\"Ididn’twishtotelltheothersallofit，\"shesaid，\"butIwilltellyou。Inaway，Ithinkyoushouldbeheldresponsible。Canyouguessinwhatmannerthatghostawakenedmelastnight？\"
\"Rattledchains，\"suggestedTerence，aftersomethought，\"orgroaned？
Theyusuallydooneortheother。\"
\"Doyouhappentoknow，\"continuedMrs。Bellmore，withsuddenirrelevancy，\"ifIresembleanyoneofthefemalerelativesofyourrestlessancestor，’
CaptainKinsolving？\"
\"Don’tthinkso，\"saidTerence，withanextremelypuzzledair。\"Neverheardofanyofthembeingnotedbeauties。\"
\"Then，why，\"saidMrs。Bellmore，lookingtheyoungmangravelyintheeye，\"shouldthatghosthavekissedme，asI’msureitdid？\"
\"Heavens！\"exclaimedTerence，inwide-eyedamazement；\"youdon’tmeanthat，Mrs。Bellmore！Didheactuallykissyou？\"
\"Isaid_it_，\"correctedMrs。Bellmore。\"Ihopetheimpersonalpronouniscorrectlyused。\"
\"ButwhydidyousayIwasresponsible？\"
\"Becauseyouaretheonlylivingmalerelativeoftheghost。\"
\"Isee。’Untothethirdandfourthgeneration。’But，seriously，didhe——didit——howdoyou——？\"
\"Know？Howdoesanyoneknow？Iwasasleep，andthatiswhatawakenedme，I’malmostcertain。\"
\"Almost？\"
\"Well，Iawokejustas——oh，can’tyouunderstandwhatImean？Whenanythingarousesyousuddenly，youarenotpositivewhetheryoudreamed，or——andyetyouknowthat——Dearme，Terence，mustIdissectthemostelementarysensationsinordertoaccommodateyourextremelypracticalintelligence？\"
\"But，aboutkissingghosts，youknow，\"saidTerence，humbly，\"Irequirethemostprimaryinstruction。Ineverkissedaghost。Isit——isit？\"
\"Thesensation，\"saidMrs。Bellmore，withdeliberate，butslightlysmiling，emphasis，\"sinceyouareseekinginstruction，isaminglingofthematerialandthespiritual。\"
\"Ofcourse，\"saidTerence，suddenlygrowingserious，\"itwasadreamorsomekindofanhallucination。Nobodybelievesinspirits，thesedays。
Ifyoutoldthetaleoutofkindnessofheart，Mrs。Bellmore，Ican’texpresshowgratefulIamtoyou。Ithasmademymothersupremelyhappy。
ThatRevolutionaryancestorwasastunningidea。\"
Mrs。Bellmoresighed。\"Theusualfateofghost-seersismine，\"shesaid，resignedly。\"Myprivilegedencounterwithaspiritisattributedtolobstersaladormendacity。Well，Ihave，atleast，onememoryleftfromthewreck——akissfromtheunseenworld。WasCaptainKinsolvingaverybraveman，doyouknow，Terence？\"
\"HewaslickedatYorktown，Ibelieve，\"saidTerence，reflecting。\"Theysayheskedaddledwithhiscompany，afterthefirstbattlethere。\"
\"Ithoughthemusthavebeentimid，\"saidMrs。Bellmore，absently。\"Hemighthavehadanother。\"
\"Anotherbattle？\"askedTerence，dully。
\"WhatelsecouldImean？Imustgoandgetreadynow；theautowillbehereinanhour。I’veenjoyedClifftopimmensely。Suchalovelymorning，isn’tit，Terence？\"
Onherwaytothestation，Mrs。Bellmoretookfromherbagasilkhandkerchief，andlookedatitwithalittlepeculiarsmile。Thenshetieditinseveralveryhardknots，andthrewit，ataconvenientmoment，overtheedgeofthecliffalongwhichtheroadran。
Inhisroom，Terencewasgivingsomedirectionstohisman，Brooks。\"Havethisstuffdoneupinaparcel，\"hesaid，\"andshipittotheaddressonthatcard。\"
ThecardwasthatofaNewYorkcostumer。The\"stuff\"wasagentleman’scostumeofthedaysof’76，madeofwhitesatin，withsilverbuckles，whitesilkstockings，andwhitekidshoes。Apowderedwigandaswordcompletedthedress。
\"Andlookabout，Brooks，\"addedTerence，alittleanxiously，\"forasilkhandkerchiefwithmyinitialsinonecorner。Imusthavedroppeditsomewhere。\"
ItwasamonthlaterwhenMrs。BellmoreandoneortwoothersofthesmartcrowdweremakingupalistofnamesforacoachingtripthroughtheCatskills。Mrs。Bellmorelookedoverthelistforafinalcensoring。ThenameofTerenceKinsolvingwasthere。Mrs。Bellmoreranherprohibitivepencillightlythroughthename。
\"Tooshy！\"shemurmured，sweetly，inexplanation。
XIJIMMYHAYESANDMURIEL
I
Supperwasover，andtherehadfallenuponthecampthesilencethataccompaniestherollingofcorn-huskcigarettes。Thewaterholeshonefromthedarkearthlikeapatchoffallensky。Coyotesyelped。Dullthumpsindicatedtherocking-horsemovementsofthehobbledponiesastheymovedtofreshgrass。Ahalf-troopoftheFrontierBattalionofTexasRangersweredistributedaboutthefire。
Awell-knownsound——theflutteringandscrapingofchaparralagainstwoodenstirrups——camefromthethickbrushabovethecamp。Therangerslistenedcautiously。Theyheardaloudandcheerfulvoicecalloutreassuringly：
\"Braceup，Muriel，oldgirl，we’re’mosttherenow！Beenalongrideforye，ain’tit，yeoldantediluvianhandfulofanimatedcarpet-tacks？Hey，now，quitatryin’tokissme！Don’tholdontomynecksotight——thisherepainthossain’tanytooshore-footed，letmetellye。He’sliabletodumpusbothoffifwedon’twatchout。\"
Twominutesofwaitingbroughtatired\"paint\"ponysingle-footingintocamp。Aganglingyouthoftwentylolledinthesaddle。Ofthe\"Muriel\"
whomhehadbeenaddressing，nothingwastobeseen。
\"Hi，fellows！\"shoutedtheridercheerfully。\"Thishere’saletterferLieutenantManning。\"
Hedismounted，unsaddled，droppedthecoilsofhisstake-rope，andgothishobblesfromthesaddle-horn。WhileLieutenantManning，incommand，wasreadingtheletter，thenewcomer，rubbedsolicitouslyatsomedriedmudintheloopsofthehobbles，showingaconsiderationfortheforelegsofhismount。
\"Boys，\"saidthelieutenant，wavinghishandtotherangers，\"thisisMr。
JamesHayes。He’sanewmemberofthecompany。CaptainMcLeansendshimdownfromElPaso。Theboyswillseethatyouhavesomesupper，Hayes，assoonasyougetyourponyhobbled。\"
Therecruitwasreceivedcordiallybytherangers。Still，theyobservedhimshrewdlyandwithsuspendedjudgment。Pickingacomradeontheborderisdonewithtentimesthecareanddiscretionwithwhichagirlchoosesasweetheart。Onyour\"side-kicker’s\"nerve，loyalty，aim，andcoolnessyourownlifemaydependmanytimes。
AfteraheartysupperHayesjoinedthesmokersaboutthefire。Hisappearancedidnotsettleallthequestionsinthemindsofhisbrotherrangers。Theysawsimplyaloose，lankyouthwithtow-coloured，sun-burnedhairandaberry-brown，ingenuousfacethatworeaquizzical，good-naturedsmile。
\"Fellows，\"saidthenewranger，\"I’mgoin’tointerducetoyoualadyfriendofmine。Ain’teverheardanybodycallherabeauty，butyou’llalladmitshe’sgotsomefinepointsabouther。Comealong，Muriel！\"
Heheldopenthefrontofhisblueflannelshirt。Outofitcrawledahornedfrog。Abrightredribbonwastiedjauntilyarounditsspikyneck。Itcrawledtoitsowner’skneeandsatthere，motionless。
\"ThishereMuriel，\"saidHayes，withanoratoricalwaveofhishand，\"hasgotqualities。Shenevertalksback，shealwaysstaysathome，andshe’ssatisfiedwithonereddressforeverydayandSunday，too。\"
\"Lookatthatblameinsect！\"saidoneoftherangerswithagrin。\"I’veseenplentyofthemhornyfrogs，butIneverknewanybodytohaveoneforaside-partner。Doestheblamethingknowyoufromanybodyelse？\"
\"Takeitoverthereandsee，\"saidHayes。
Thestumpylittlelizardknownasthehornedfrogisharmless。Hehasthehideousnessoftheprehistoricmonsterswhosereduceddescendantheis，butheisgentlerthanthedove。
TherangertookMurielfromHayes’skneeandwentbacktohisseatonarollofblankets。Thecaptivetwistedandclawedandstruggledvigorouslyinhishand。Afterholdingitforamomentortwo，therangersetitupontheground。Awkwardly，butswiftlythefrogworkeditsfouroddlymovinglegsuntilitstoppedclosebyHayes’sfoot。
\"Well，dangmyhide！\"saidtheotherranger。\"Thelittlecussknowsyou。
Neverthoughttheminsectshadthatmuchsense！\"
II
JimmyHayesbecameafavouriteintherangercamp。Hehadanendlessstoreofgood-nature，andamild，perennialqualityofhumourthatiswelladaptedtocamplife。Hewasneverwithouthishornedfrog。Inthebosomofhisshirtduringrides，onhiskneeorshoulderincamp，underhisblanketsatnight，theuglylittlebeastneverlefthim。
JimmywasahumouristofatypethatprevailsintheruralSouthandWest。Unskilledinoriginatingmethodsofamusingorinwittyconceptions，hehadhituponacomicalideaandclungtoitreverently。
IthadseemedtoJimmyaveryfunnythingtohaveabouthisperson，withwhichtoamusehisfriends，atamehornedfrogwitharedribbonarounditsneck。Asitwasahappyidea，whynotperpetuateit？
ThesentimentsexistingbetweenJimmyandthefrogcannotbeexactlydetermined。Thecapabilityofthehornedfrogforlastingaffectionisasubjectuponwhichwehavehadnosymposiums。ItiseasiertoguessJimmy’sfeelings。Murielwashischef_d’oeuvre_ofwit，andassuchhecherishedher。Hecaughtfliesforher，andshieldedherfromsuddennorthers。Yethiscarewashalfselfish，andwhenthetimecamesherepaidhimathousandfold。OtherMurielshavethusoverbalancedthelightattentionsofotherJimmies。
NotatoncedidJimmyHayesattainfullbrotherhoodwithhiscomrades。
Theylovedhimforhissimplicityanddrollness，buttherehungabovehimagreatswordofsuspendedjudgment。Tomakemerryincampisnotallofaranger’slife。Therearehorse-thievestotrail，desperatecriminalstorundown，bravostobattlewith，banditstoroutoutofthechaparral，peaceandordertobecompelledatthemuzzleofasix-shooter。Jimmyhadbeen\"’mostgenerallyacow-puncher，\"hesaid；hewasinexperiencedinrangermethodsofwarfare。Thereforetherangersspeculatedapartandsolemnlyastohowhewouldstandfire。For，letitbeknown，thehonourandprideofeachrangercompanyistheindividualbraveryofitsmembers。
Fortwomonthstheborderwasquiet。Therangerslolled，listless，incamp。Andthen——bringingjoytotherustingguardiansofthefrontier——SebastianoSaldar，aneminentMexicandesperadoandcattle-thief，crossedtheRioGrandewithhisgangandbegantolaywastetheTexasside。TherewereindicationsthatJimmyHayeswouldsoonhavetheopportunitytoshowhismettle。Therangerspatrolledwithalacrity，butSaldar’smenweremountedlikeLochinvar，andwerehardtocatch。
Oneevening，aboutsundown，therangershaltedforsupperafteralongride。Theirhorsesstoodpanting，withtheirsaddleson。Themenwerefryingbaconandboilingcoffee。Suddenly，outofthebrush，SebastianoSaldarandhisgangdasheduponthemwithblazingsix-shootersandhigh-voicedyells。Itwasaneatsurprise。Therangerssworeinannoyedtones，andgottheirWinchestersbusy；buttheattackwasonlyaspectaculardashofthepurestMexicantype。Afterthefloriddemonstrationtheraidersgallopedaway，yelling，downtheriver。Therangersmountedandpursued；butinlessthantwomilesthefaggedponieslabouredsothatLieutenantManninggavethewordtoabandonthechaseandreturntothecamp。
ThenitwasdiscoveredthatJimmyHayeswasmissing。Someonerememberedhavingseenhimrunforhisponywhentheattackbegan，butnoonehadseteyesonhimsince。Morningcame，butnoJimmy。Theysearchedthecountryaround，onthetheorythathehadbeenkilledorwounded，butwithoutsuccess。ThentheyfollowedafterSaldar’sgang，butitseemedtohavedisappeared。ManningconcludedthatthewilyMexicanhadrecrossedtheriverafterhistheatricfarewell。And，indeed，nofurtherdepredationsfromhimwerereported。
Thisgavetherangerstimetonurseasorenesstheyhad。Ashasbeensaid，theprideandhonourofthecompanyistheindividualbraveryofitsmembers。AndnowtheybelievedthatJimmyHayeshadturnedcowardatthewhizofMexicanbullets。Therewasnootherdeduction。BuckDavispointedoutthatnotashotwasfiredbySaldar’sgangafterJimmywasseenrunningforhishorse。Therewasnowayforhimtohavebeenshot。
No，hehadfledfromhisfirstfight，andafterwardhewouldnotreturn，awarethatthescornofhiscomradeswouldbeaworsethingtofacethanthemuzzlesofmanyrifles。
SoManning’sdetachmentofMcLean’scompany，FrontierBattalion，wasgloomy。Itwasthefirstblotonitsescutcheon。Neverbeforeinthehistoryoftheservicehadarangershownthewhitefeather。AllofthemhadlikedJimmyHayes，andthatmadeitworse。
Days，weeks，andmonthswentby，andstillthatlittlecloudofunforgottencowardicehungabovethecamp。
III
Nearlyayearafterward——aftermanycampinggroundsandmanyhundredsofmilesguardedanddefended——LieutenantManning，withalmostthesamedetachmentofmen，wassenttoapointonlyafewmilesbelowtheiroldcampontherivertolookaftersomesmugglingthere。Oneafternoon，whiletheywereridingthroughadensemesquiteflat，theycameuponapatchofopenhog-wallowprairie。Theretheyrodeuponthesceneofanunwrittentragedy。
Inabighog-wallowlaytheskeletonsofthreeMexicans。Theirclothingaloneservedtoidentifythem。ThelargestofthefigureshadoncebeenSebastianoSaldar。Hisgreat，costlysombrero，heavywithgoldornamentation——ahatfamousallalongtheRioGrande——laytherepiercedbythreebullets。Alongtheridgeofthehog-wallowrestedtherustingWinchestersoftheMexicans——allpointinginthesamedirection。
Therangersrodeinthatdirectionforfiftyyards。There，inalittledepressionoftheground，withhisriflestillbearinguponthethree，layanotherskeleton。Ithadbeenabattleofextermination。Therewasnothingtoidentifythesolitarydefender。Hisclothing——suchastheelementshadleftdistinguishable——seemedtobeofthekindthatanyranchmanorcowboymighthaveworn。
\"Somecow-puncher，\"saidManning，\"thattheycaughtoutalone。Goodboy！
Heputupadandyscrapbeforetheygothim。Sothat’swhywedidn’thearfromDonSebastianoanymore！\"
Andthen，frombeneaththeweather-beatenragsofthedeadman，therewriggledoutahornedfrogwithafadedredribbonarounditsneck，andsatupontheshoulderofitslongquietmaster。Mutelyittoldthestoryoftheuntriedyouthandtheswift\"paint\"pony——howtheyhadoutstrippedalltheircomradesthatdayinthepursuitoftheMexicanraiders，andhowtheboyhadgonedownupholdingthehonourofthecompany。
Therangertroopherdedclose，andasimultaneouswildyellarosefromtheirlips。Theoutburstwasatonceadirge，anapology，anepitaph，andapaeanoftriumph。Astrangerequiem，youmaysay，overthebodyofafallen，comrade；butifJimmyHayescouldhaveheardithewouldhaveunderstood。
XIITHEDOOROFUNREST
Isatanhourbysun，intheeditor’sroomoftheMontopolis_WeeklyBugle_。Iwastheeditor。
ThesaffronraysofthedecliningsunlightfilteredthroughthecornstalksinMicajahWiddup’sgarden-patch，andcastanambergloryuponmypaste-pot。Isatattheeditorialdeskinmynon-rotaryrevolvingchair，andpreparedmyeditorialagainsttheoligarchies。Theroom，withitsonewindow，wasalreadyapreytothetwilight。Onebyone，withmytrenchantsentences，Iloppedofftheheadsofthepoliticalhydra，whileI
listened，fullofkindlypeace，tothehome-comingcow-bellsandwonderedwhatMrs。Flanaganwasgoingtohaveforsupper。
Theninfromthedusky，quietstreettheredriftedandperchedhimselfuponacornerofmydeskoldFatherTime’syoungerbrother。HisfacewasbeardlessandasgnarledasanEnglishwalnut。Ineversawclothessuchashewore。TheywouldhavereducedJoseph’scoattoamonochrome。Butthecolourswerenotthedyer’s。Stainsandpatchesandtheworkofsunandrustwereresponsibleforthediversity。Onhiscoarseshoeswasthedust，conceivably，ofathousandleagues。Icandescribehimnofurther，excepttosaythathewaslittleandweirdandold——oldIbegantoestimateincenturieswhenIsawhim。Yes，andIrememberthattherewasanodour，afaintodourlikealoes，orpossiblylikemyrrhorleather；andIthoughtofmuseums。
AndthenIreachedforapadandpencil，forbusinessisbusiness，andvisitsoftheoldestinhabitantsaresacredandhonourable，requiringtobechronicled。
\"Iamgladtoseeyou，sir，\"Isaid。\"Iwouldofferyouachair，but——
yousee，sir，\"Iwenton，\"IhavelivedinMontopolisonlythreeweeks，andIhavenotmetmanyofourcitizens。\"Iturnedadoubtfuleyeuponhisdust-stainedshoes，andconcludedwithanewspaperphrase，\"Isupposethatyouresideinourmidst？\"
Myvisitorfumbledinhisraiment，drewforthasoiledcard，andhandedittome。Uponitwaswritten，inplainbutunsteadilyformedcharacters，thename\"MichobAder。\"
\"Iamgladyoucalled，Mr。Ader，\"Isaid。\"Asoneofouroldercitizens，youmustviewwithpridetherecentgrowthandenterpriseofMontopolis。
Amongotherimprovements，IthinkIcanpromisethatthetownwillnowbeprovidedwithalive，enterprisingnewspa——\"
\"Doyeknowthenameonthatcard？\"askedmycaller，interruptingme。
\"Itisnotafamiliaronetome，\"Isaid。
Againhevisitedthedepthsofhisancientvestments。Thistimehebroughtoutatornleafofsomebookorjournal，brownandflimsywithage。Theheadingofthepagewasthe_TurkishSpy_inold-styletype；theprintinguponitwasthis：
\"ThereisamancometoParisinthisyear1643whopretendstohavelivedthesesixteenhundredyears。HesaysofhimselfthathewasashoemakerinJerusalematthetimeoftheCrucifixion；thathisnameisMichobAder；
andthatwhenJesus，theChristianMessias，wascondemnedbyPontiusPilate，theRomanpresident，hepausedtorestwhilebearinghiscrosstotheplaceofcrucifixionbeforethedoorofMichobAder。TheshoemakerstruckJesuswithhisfist，saying：’Go；whytarriestthou？’TheMessiasansweredhim：’Iindeedamgoing；butthoushalttarryuntilIcome’；
therebycondemninghimtoliveuntilthedayofjudgment。Helivesforever，butattheendofeveryhundredyearshefallsintoafitortrance，onrecoveringfromwhichhefindshimselfinthesamestateofyouthinwhichhewaswhenJesussuffered，beingthenaboutthirtyyearsofage。
\"SuchisthestoryoftheWanderingJew，astoldbyMichobAder，whorelates——\"Heretheprintingended。
ImusthavemutteredaloudsomethingtomyselfabouttheWanderingJew，fortheoldmanspakeup，bitterlyandloudly。
\"’Tisalie，\"saidhe，\"likeninetenthsofwhatyecallhistory。’TisaGentileIam，andnoJew。IamafterfootingitoutofJerusalem，myson；
butifthatmakesmeaJew，theneverythingthatcomesoutofabottleisbabies’milk。Yehavemynameonthecardyehold；andyehavereadthebitofpapertheycallthe_TurkishSpy_thatprintedthenewswhenI
steppedintotheirofficeonthe12thdayofJune，intheyear1643，justasIhavecalleduponyeto-day。\"
Ilaiddownmypencilandpad。Clearlyitwouldnotdo。Herewasanitemforthelocalcolumnofthe_Bugle_that——butitwouldnotdo。Still，fragmentsoftheimpossible\"personal\"begantoflitthroughmyconventionalizedbrain。\"UncleMichobisasspryonhislegsasayoungchapofonlyathousandorso。\"\"Ourvenerablecallerrelateswith’pridethatGeorgeWash——no，PtolemytheGreat——oncedandledhimonhiskneeathisfather’shouse。\"\"UncleMichobsaysthatourwetspringwasnothingincomparisonwiththedampnessthatruinedthecropsaroundMountAraratwhenhewasaboy——\"Butno，no——itwouldnotdo。
Iwastryingtothinkofsomeconversationalsubjectwithwhichtointerestmyvisitor，andwashesitatingbetweenwalkingmatchesandthePlioceneage，whentheoldmansuddenlybegantoweeppoignantlyanddistressfully。
\"Cheerup，Mr。Ader，\"Isaid，alittleawkwardly；\"thismattermayblowoverinafewhundredyearsmore。TherehasalreadybeenadecidedreactioninfavourofJudasIscariotandColonelBurrandthecelebratedviolinist，SignorNero。Thisistheageofwhitewash。Youmustnotallowyourselftobecomedown-hearted。\"
Unknowingly，Ihadstruckachord。Theoldmanblinkedbelligerentlythroughhisseniletears。
\"’Tistime，\"hesaid，\"thattheliarsbedoin’justicetosomebody。Yerhistoriansarenomorethanapackofoldwomengabblin’atawake。A
finermanthantheImperorNeroniverworesandals。Man，Iwasattheburnin’ofRome。IknowedtheImperorwell，forinthemdaysIwasawell-knownchar-acter。Inthimdaystheyhadrayspectforamanthatlivedforever。
\"But’twasoftheImperorNeroIwasgoin’totellye。IstruckintoRome，uptheAppianWay，onthenightofJulythe16th，theyear64。I
hadjuststeppeddownbywayofSiberiaandAfghanistan；andonefootofmehadafrost-bite，andtheotherablisterburnedbythesandofthedesert；andIwasfeelin’abitbluefromdoin’patroldutyfromtheNorthPoledowntotheLastChancecornerinPatagonia，andbein’miscalledaJewinthebargain。Well，I’mtellin’yeIwaspassin’theCircusMaximus，anditwasdarkaspitchovertheway，andthenIheardsomebodysingout，’Isthatyou，Michob？’
\"Overag’instthewall，hidoutamongstapileofbarrelsandolddry-goodsboxes，wastheImperorNerowidhistogywrappedaroundhistoes，smokin’along，blacksegar。
\"’Haveone，Michob？’sayshe。
\"’Noneoftheweedsforme，’saysI——’naytherpipenorsegar。What’stheuse，’saysI，’ofsmokin’whenye’venotgottheghostofachanceofkillin’yeselfbydoin’it？’
\"’Trueforye，MichobAder，myperpetualJew，’saystheImperor；’ye’renotalwayswandering。Sure，’tisdangergivesthespiceofourpleasures——nexttotheirbein’forbidden。’
\"’Andforwhat，’saysI，’doyesmokebenightindarkplaceswidoutevenacinturioninplainclothestoattendye？’
\"’Haveyeeverheard，Michob，’saystheImperor，’ofpredestinarianism？’
\"’I’vehadthecousinofit，’saysI。’I’vebeenonthetrotwithpedestrianismformanyayear，andmoretocome，asyewellknow。’
\"’Thelongerword，’saysmefriendNero，’isthetachin’ofthisnewsectofpeopletheycalltheChristians。’Tisthemthat’sraysponsibleformesmokin’benightinholesandcornersofthedark。’
\"AndthenIsetsdownandtakesoffashoeandrubsmefootthatisfrosted，andtheImperortellsmeaboutit。ItseemsthatsinceIpassedthatwaybefore，theImperorhadmandamusedtheImpresswidadivorcesuit，andMissesPoppaea，acilibratedlady，wasingaged，widoutriferences，ashousekeeperatthepalace。’Allinoneday，’saystheImperor，’sheputsupnewlacewindy-curtainsinthepalaceandjoinstheanti-tobaccosociety，andwhinIfeelstheneedofasmokeImustbeaftersneakin’outtothesepilesoflumberinthedark。’SothereinthedarkmeandtheImperorsat，andItoldhimofmetravels。AndwhentheysaytheImperorwasanincindiary，theylie。’Twasthatnightthefirestartedthatburntthecity。’Tismyopinionthatitbeganfromastumpofsegarthathethrewdownamongtheboxes。And’tisaliethathefiddled。Hedidallhecouldforsixdaystostopit，sir。\"
AndnowIdetectedanewflavourtoMr。MichobAder。IthadnotbeenmyrrhorbalmorhyssopthatIhadsmelled。Theemanationwastheodourofbadwhiskey——and，worsestill，oflowcomedy——thesortthatsmallhumoristsmanufacturebyclothingthegraveandreverendthingsoflegendandhistoryinthevulgar，topicalfripperythatpassesforacertainkindofwit。MichobAderasanimpostor，claimingnineteenhundredyears，andplayinghispartwiththedecencyofrespectablelunacy，Icouldendure；
butasatediouswag，cheapeninghisegregiousstorywithsong-booklevity，hisimportanceasanentertainergrewless。
Andthen，asifhesuspectedmythoughts，hesuddenlyshiftedhiskey。
\"You’llexcuseme，sir，\"hewhined，\"butsometimesIgetalittlemixedinmyhead。Iamaveryoldman；anditishardtoremembereverything。\"
Iknewthathewasright，andthatIshouldnottrytoreconcilehimwithRomanhistory；soIaskedfornewsconcerningotherancientswithwhomhehadwalkedfamiliar。
AbovemydeskhunganengravingofRaphael’scherubs。Youcouldyetmakeouttheirforms，thoughthedustblurredtheiroutlinesstrangely。
\"Yecallsthem’cher-rubs’，\"cackledtheoldman。\"Babes，yefancytheyare，withwings。Andthere’sonewidlegsandabowandarrowthatyecallCupid——Iknowwheretheywasfound。Thegreat-great-great-grandfatherofthimallwasabilly-goat。Bein’aneditor，sir，doyehappentoknowwhereSolomonsTemplestood？\"
Ifanciedthatitwasin——inPersia？Well，Ididnotknow。
\"’TisnotinhistorynorintheBiblewhereitwas。ButIsawit，meself。Thefirstpicturesofcher-rubsandcupidswassculptureduponthimwallsandpillars。Twoofthebiggest，sir，stoodintheadytumtoformthebaldachinovertheArk。Butthewingsofthimsculptureswasintindidforhorns。Andthefaceswasthefacesofgoats。Tenthousandgoatstherewasinandaboutthetemple。Andyourcher-rubswasbilly-goatsinthedaysofKingSolomon，butthepaintersmisconstruedthehornsintowings。
\"AndIknewTamerlane，thelameTimour，sir，verywell。IsawhimatKeghutandatZaranj。Hewasalittlemannolargerthanyerself，withhairthecolourofanamberpipestem。TheyburiedhimatSamarkandIwasatthewake，sir。Oh，hewasafine-builtmaninhiscoffin，sixfeetlong，withblackwhiskerstohisface。AndIsee’emthrowturnipsattheImperorVispacianinAfrica。AllovertheworldIhavetramped，sir，withoutthebodyofmefindin’anyrest。’TwassocommandedIsawJerusalemdestroyed，andPompeiigoupinthefireworks；andIwasatthecoronationofCharlemagneandthelynchin’ofJoanofArc。AndeverywhereIgotherecomesstormsandrevolutionsandplaguesandfires。’Twassocommanded。YehaveheardoftheWanderingJew。’Tisallso，exceptthatdivilabitamIaJew。Buthistorylies，asIhavetoldye。Areyequitesure，sir，thatyehaven’tadropofwhiskeyconvenient？YewellknowthatIhavemanymilesofwalkingbeforeme。\"
\"Ihavenone，\"saidI，\"and，ifyouplease，Iamabouttoleaveformysupper。\"
Ipushedmychairbackcreakingly。Thisancientlandlubberwasbecomingasgreatanafflictionasanycross-bowedmariner。Heshookamustyeffluviumfromhispiebaldclothes，overturnedmyinkstand，andwentonwithhisinsufferablenonsense。
\"Iwouldn’tminditsomuch，\"hecomplained，\"ifitwasn’tfortheworkI
mustdoonGoodFridays。YeknowaboutPontiusPilate，sir，ofcourse。
Hisbody，whinhekilledhimself，waspitchedintoalakeontheAlpsmountains。Now，listentothejobthat’tisminetoperformonthenightofiveryGoodFriday。TheoulddivilgoesdowninthepoolanddragsupPontius，andthewaterisbilin’andspewin’likeawashpot。Andtheoulddivilsetsthebodyontopofathroneontherocks，andthincomesmeshareofthejob。Oh，sir，yewouldpitymethin——yewouldprayforthepoorWanderingJewthatniverwasaJewifyecouldseethehorrorofthethingthatImustdo。’TisIthatmustfetchabowlofwaterandkneeldownbeforeittillitwashesitshands。IdeclaretoyethatPontiusPilate，amandeadtwohundredyears，draggedupwiththelakeslimecoverin’himandfisheswrigglin’insideofhimwidouteyes，andinthediscompositionofthebody，sitsthere，sir，andwasheshishandsinthebowlIholdforhimonGoodFridays。’Twassocommanded。\"
Clearly，thematterhadprogressedfarbeyondthescopeofthe_Bugle’s_
localcolumn。Theremighthavebeenemploymenthereforthealienistorforthosewhocirculatethepledge；butIhadhadenoughofit。Igotup，andrepeatedthatImustgo。
Atthisheseizedmycoat，grovelleduponmydesk，andburstagainintodistressfulweeping。Whateveritwasabout，Isaidtomyselfthathisgriefwasgenuine。
\"Comenow，Mr。Ader，\"Isaid，soothingly；\"whatisthematter？\"
Theanswercamebrokenlythroughhisrackingsobs：
\"BecauseIwouldnot……letthepoorChrist……rest……uponthestep。\"
Hishallucinationseemedbeyondallreasonableanswer；yettheeffectofituponhimscarcelymeriteddisrespect。ButIknewnothingthatmightassuageit；andItoldhimoncemorethatbothofusshouldbeleavingtheofficeatonce。
Obedientatlast，heraisedhimselffrommydishevelleddesk，andpermittedmetohalflifthimtothefloor。Thegaleofhisgriefhadblownawayhiswords；hisfreshetoftearshadsoakedawaythecrustofhisgrief。Reminiscencediedinhim——atleast，thecoherentpartofit。
\"’Twasmethatdidit，\"hemuttered，asIledhimtowardthedoor——\"me，theshoemakerofJerusalem。\"
Igothimtothesidewalk，andintheaugmentedlightIsawthathisfacewassearedandlinedandwarpedbyasadnessalmostincrediblytheproductofasinglelifetime。
Andthenhighupinthefirmamentaldarknessweheardtheclamantcriesofsomegreat，passingbirds。MyWanderingJewliftedhishand，withside-tiltedhead。
\"TheSevenWhistlers！\"hesaid，asoneintroduceswell-knownfriends。
\"Wildgeese，\"saidI；\"butIconfessthattheirnumberisbeyondme。\"
\"Theyfollowmeeverywhere，\"hesaid。\"’Twassocommanded。WhatyehearisthesoulsofthesevenJewsthathelpedwiththeCrucifixion。
Sometimesthey’reploversandsometimesgeese，butye’llfindthemalwaysflyin’whereIgo。\"
Istood，uncertainhowtotakemyleave。Ilookeddownthestreet，shuffledmyfeet，lookedbackagain——andfeltmyhairrise。Theoldmanhaddisappeared。
Andthenmycapillariesrelaxed，forIdimlysawhimfootingitawaythroughthedarkness。Buthewalkedsoswiftlyandsilentlyandcontrarytothegaitpromisedbyhisagethatmycomposurewasnotallrestored，thoughIknewnotwhy。
ThatnightIwasfoolishenoughtotakedownsomedust-coveredvolumesfrommymodestshelves。Isearched\"HermippusRedivvus\"and\"Salathiel\"
andthe\"PepysCollection\"invain。Andtheninabookcalled\"TheCitizenoftheWorld，\"andinonetwocenturiesold，IcameuponwhatI
desired。MichobAderhadindeedcometoParisintheyear1643，andrelatedtothe_TurkishSpy_anextraordinarystory。HeclaimedtobetheWanderingJew，andthat——
ButhereIfellasleep，formyeditorialdutieshadnotbeenlightthatday。
JudgeHooverwasthe_Bugle’s_candidateforcongress。Havingtoconferwithhim，Isoughthishomeearlythenextmorning；andwewalkedtogetherdowntownthroughalittlestreetwithwhichIwasunfamiliar。
\"DidyoueverhearofMichobAder？\"Iaskedhim，smiling。
\"Why，yes，\"saidthejudge。\"Andthatremindsmeofmyshoeshehasformending。Hereishisshopnow。\"
JudgeHooversteppedintoadingy，smallshop。Ilookedupatthesign，andsaw\"MikeO’Bader，BootandShoeMaker，\"onit。Somewildgeesepassedabove，honkingclearly。Iscratchedmyearandfrowned，andthentrailedintotheshop。
TheresatmyWanderingJewonhisshoemaker’sbench，trimmingahalf-sole。Hewasdrabbledwithdew，grass-stained，unkempt，andmiserable；andonhisfacewasstilltheunexplainedwretchedness，theproblematicsorrow，theesotericwoe，thathadbeenwrittentherebynothingless，itseemed，thanthestylusofthecenturies。
JudgeHooverinquiredkindlyconcerninghisshoes。Theoldshoemakerlookedup，andspokesanelyenough。Hehadbeenill，hesaid，forafewdays。Thenextdaytheshoeswouldbeready。Helookedatme，andI
couldseethatIhadnoplaceinhismemory。Sooutwewent，andonourway。
\"OldMike，\"remarkedthecandidate，\"hasbeenononeofhissprees。Hegetscrazydrunkregularlyonceamonth。Buthe’sagoodshoemaker。\"
\"Whatishishistory？\"Iinquired。
\"Whiskey，\"epitomizedJudgeHoover。\"Thatexplainshim。\"
Iwassilent，butIdidnotaccepttheexplanation。Andso，whenIhadthechance，IaskedoldmanSellers，whobrowseddailyonmyexchanges。
\"MikeO’Bader，\"saidhe，\"wasmakin’shoesinMontopoliswhenIcomeheregoin’onfifteenyearago。Iguesswhiskey’shistrouble。Onceamonthhegetsoffthetrack，andstayssoaweek。He’sgotarigmarolesomethin’abouthisbein’aJewpedlerthathetellsev’rybody。Nobodywon’tlistentohimanymore。Whenhe’ssoberheain’tsichafool——
he’sgotasightofbooksinthebackroomofhisshopthathereads。I
guessyoucanlayallhistroubletowhiskey。\"
ButagainIwouldnot。NotyetwasmyWanderingJewrightlyconstruedforme。Itrustthatwomenmaynotbeallowedatitletoallthecuriosityintheworld。SowhenMontopolis’soldestinhabitant（someninetyscoreyearsyoungerthanMichobAder）droppedintoacquirepromulgationinprint，Isiphonedhisperpetualtrickleofreminiscenceinthedirectionoftheuninterpretedmakerofshoes。
UncleAbnerwastheCompleteHistoryofMontopolis，boundinbutternut。
\"O’Bader，\"hequavered，\"comeherein’69。Hewasthefirstshoemakerintheplace。Folksgenerallyconsidershimcrazyattimesnow。Buthedon’tharmnobody。Is’posedrinkin’upsethismind——yes，drinkin’verylikelydoneit。It’sapowerfulbadthing，drinkin’。I’manold，oldman，sir，andIneverseenogoodindrinkin’。\"
Ifeltdisappointment。Iwaswillingtoadmitdrinkinthecaseofmyshoemaker，butIpreferreditasarecourseinsteadofacause。Whyhadhepitcheduponhisperpetual，strangenoteoftheWanderingJew？Whyhisunutterablegriefduringhisaberration？Icouldnotyetacceptwhiskeyasanexplanation。
\"DidMikeO’Badereverhaveagreatlossortroubleofanykind？\"Iasked。
\"Lemmesee！Aboutthirtyyearagotherewassomethin’ofthekind，I
recollect。Montopolis，sir，inthemdaysusedtobeamightystrictplace。
\"Well，MikeO’Baderhadadaughterthen——arightprettygirl。ShewastoogayasortforMontopolissoonedaysheslipsofftoanothertownandrunsawaywithacircus。Itwastwoyearsbeforeshecomesback，allfixedupinfineclothesandringsandjewellery，toseeMike。Hewouldn’thavenothin’todowithher，soshestaysaroundtownawhile，anyway。Ireckonthemenfolkswouldn’thaveraisednoobjections，butthewomenegged’emontoorderhertoleavetown。Butshehadplentyofspunk，andtold’emtomindtheirownbusiness。
\"Soonenighttheydecidedtorunheraway。Acrowdofmenandwomendroveheroutofherhouse，andchasedherwithsticksandstones。Sheruntoherfather’sdoor，callin’forhelp。Mikeopensit，andwhenheseeswhoitishehitsherwithhisfistandknocksherdownandshutsthedoor。
\"Andthenthecrowdkeptonchunkin’hertillsherunclearoutoftown。
AndthenextdaytheyfindsherdrowneddeadinHunter’smillpond。I
minditallnow。Thatwasthirtyyearago。\"
Ileanedbackinmynon-rotaryrevolvingchairandnoddedgently，likeamandarin，atmypaste-pot。
\"WhenoldMikehasaspell，\"wentonUncleAbner，tepidlygarrulous，\"hethinkshe’stheWanderin’Jew。\"
\"Heis，\"saidI，noddingaway。
AndUncleAbnercackledinsinuatinglyattheeditor’sremark，forhewasexpectingatleasta\"stickful\"inthe\"PersonalNotes\"ofthe_Bugle_。
XIIITHEDUPLICITYOFHARGRAVES
WhenMajorPendletonTalbot，ofMobile，sir，andhisdaughter，MissLydiaTalbot，cametoWashingtontoreside，theyselectedforaboardingplaceahousethatstoodfiftyyardsbackfromoneofthequietestavenues。Itwasanold-fashionedbrickbuilding，withaporticoupheldbytallwhitepillars。Theyardwasshadedbystatelylocustsandelms，andacatalpatreeinseasonraineditspinkandwhiteblossomsuponthegrass。Rowsofhighboxbusheslinedthefenceandwalks。ItwastheSouthernstyleandaspectoftheplacethatpleasedtheeyesoftheTalbots。
Inthispleasant，privateboardinghousetheyengagedrooms，includingastudyforMajorTalbot，whowasaddingthefinishingchapterstohisbook，\"AnecdotesandReminiscencesoftheAlabamaArmy，Bench，andBar。\"
MajorTalbotwasoftheold，oldSouth。Thepresentdayhadlittleinterestorexcellenceinhiseyes。HismindlivedinthatperiodbeforetheCivilWar，whentheTalbotsownedthousandsofacresoffinecottonlandandtheslavestotillthem；whenthefamilymansionwasthesceneofprincelyhospitality，anddrewitsguestsfromthearistocracyoftheSouth。Outofthatperiodhehadbroughtallitsoldprideandscruplesofhonour，anantiquatedandpunctiliouspoliteness，and（youwouldthink）
itswardrobe。
Suchclothesweresurelynevermadewithinfiftyyears。Themajorwastall，butwheneverhemadethatwonderful，archaicgenuflexionhecalledabow，thecornersofhisfrockcoatsweptthefloor。ThatgarmentwasasurpriseeventoWashington，whichhaslongagoceasedtoshyatthefrocksandbroadbrimmedhatsofSoutherncongressmen。Oneoftheboarderschristenedita\"FatherHubbard，\"anditcertainlywashighinthewaistandfullintheskirt。
Butthemajor，withallhisqueerclothes，hisimmenseareaofplaited，ravellingshirtbosom，andthelittleblackstringtiewiththebowalwaysslippingononeside，bothwassmiledatandlikedinMrs。Vardeman’sselectboardinghouse。Someoftheyoungdepartmentclerkswouldoften\"stringhim，\"astheycalledit，gettinghimstarteduponthesubjectdearesttohim——thetraditionsandhistoryofhisbelovedSouthland。
Duringhistalkshewouldquotefreelyfromthe\"AnecdotesandReminiscences。\"Buttheywereverycarefulnottolethimseetheirdesigns，forinspiteofhissixty-eightyears，hecouldmaketheboldestofthemuncomfortableunderthesteadyregardofhispiercinggrayeyes。
MissLydiawasaplump，littleoldmaidofthirty-five，withsmoothlydrawn，tightlytwistedhairthatmadeherlookstillolder。Oldfashioned，too，shewas；butante-bellumglorydidnotradiatefromherasitdidfromthemajor。Shepossessedathriftycommonsense；anditwasshewhohandledthefinancesofthefamily，andmetallcomerswhentherewerebillstopay。Themajorregardedboardbillsandwashbillsascontemptiblenuisances。Theykeptcominginsopersistentlyandsooften。Why，themajorwantedtoknow，couldtheynotbefiledandpaidinalumpsumatsomeconvenientperiod——saywhenthe\"AnecdotesandReminiscences\"hadbeenpublishedandpaidfor？MissLydiawouldcalmlygoonwithhersewingandsay，\"We’llpayaswegoaslongasthemoneylasts，andthenperhapsthey’llhavetolumpit。\"
MostofMrs。Vardeman’sboarderswereawayduringtheday，beingnearlyalldepartmentclerksandbusinessmen；buttherewasoneofthemwhowasaboutthehouseagreatdealfrommorningtonight。ThiswasayoungmannamedHenryHopkinsHargraves——everyoneinthehouseaddressedhimbyhisfullname——whowasengagedatoneofthepopularvaudevilletheatres。Vaudevillehasrisentosucharespectableplaneinthelastfewyears，andMr。Hargraveswassuchamodestandwell-manneredperson，thatMrs。Vardemancouldfindnoobjectiontoenrollinghimuponherlistofboarders。
AtthetheatreHargraveswasknownasanall-rounddialectcomedian，havingalargerepertoireofGerman，Irish，Swede，andblack-facespecialties。ButMr。Hargraveswasambitious，andoftenspokeofhisgreatdesiretosucceedinlegitimatecomedy。
ThisyoungmanappearedtoconceiveastrongfancyforMajorTalbot。
WheneverthatgentlemanwouldbeginhisSouthernreminiscences，orrepeatsomeoftheliveliestoftheanecdotes，Hargravescouldalwaysbefound，themostattentiveamonghislisteners。
Foratimethemajorshowedaninclinationtodiscouragetheadvancesofthe\"playactor，\"asheprivatelytermedhim；butsoontheyoungman’sagreeablemannerandindubitableappreciationoftheoldgentleman’sstoriescompletelywonhimover。
Itwasnotlongbeforethetwowerelikeoldchums。Themajorsetaparteachafternoontoreadtohimthemanuscriptofhisbook。DuringtheanecdotesHargravesneverfailedtolaughatexactlytherightpoint。ThemajorwasmovedtodeclaretoMissLydiaonedaythatyoungHargravespossessedremarkableperceptionandagratifyingrespectfortheoldregime。Andwhenitcametotalkingofthoseolddays——ifMajorTalbotlikedtotalk，Mr。Hargraveswasentrancedtolisten。
Likealmostalloldpeoplewhotalkofthepast，themajorlovedtolingeroverdetails。Indescribingthesplendid，almostroyal，daysoftheoldplanters，hewouldhesitateuntilhehadrecalledthenameoftheNegrowhoheldhishorse，ortheexactdateofcertainminorhappenings，orthenumberofbalesofcottonraisedinsuchayear；butHargravesnevergrewimpatientorlostinterest。Onthecontrary，hewouldadvancequestionsonavarietyofsubjectsconnectedwiththelifeofthattime，andheneverfailedtoextractreadyreplies。
Thefoxhunts，the’possumsuppers，thehoedownsandjubileesintheNegroquarters，thebanquetsintheplantation-househall，wheninvitationswentforfiftymilesaround；theoccasionalfeudswiththeneighbouringgentry；themajor’sduelwithRathboneCulbertsonaboutKittyChalmers，whoafterwardmarriedaThwaiteofSouthCarolina；andprivateyachtracesforfabuloussumsonMobileBay；thequaintbeliefs，improvidenthabits，andloyalvirtuesoftheoldslaves——alltheseweresubjectsthatheldboththemajorandHargravesabsorbedforhoursatatime。
Sometimes，atnight，whentheyoungmanwouldbecomingupstairstohisroomafterhisturnatthetheatrewasover，themajorwouldappearatthedoorofhisstudyandbeckonarchlytohim。Goingin，Hargraveswouldfindalittletablesetwithadecanter，sugarbowl，fruit，andabigbunchoffreshgreenmint。