SupposethegreatHydrographeroftheAdmiraltyhimselfcan’tdescribeit，whosurveyedtheplace；supposeMr。Fellowes，whodiscovereditafterwards——suppose，Isay，SirJohnFellowes，Knt。，can’tdoit（andIdefyanymanofimaginationtogotanimpressionofTelmessusfromhisbook）——canyou，vainman，hopetotry？Theeffectoftheartist，asItakeit，oughttobe，toproduceuponhishearer’smind，byhisart，aneffectsomethingsimilartothatproducedonhisownbythesightofthenaturalobject。Onlymusic，orthebestpoetry，candothis。Keats’s\"OdetotheGrecianUrn\"isthebestdescriptionIknowofthatsweetoldsilentruinofTelmessus。Afteryouhaveonceseenit，theremembranceremainswithyou，likeatunefromMozart，whichheseemstohavecaughtoutofheaven，andwhichringssweetharmonyinyourearsforeverafter！It’sabenefitforallafterlife！
Youhavebuttoshutyoureyes，andthink，andrecallit，andthedelightfulvisioncomessmilingback，toyourorder！——thedivineair——thedeliciouslittlepageant，whichnaturesetbeforeyouonthisluckyday。
Hereistheentrymadeinthenote-bookontheeventfulday：-\"InthemorningsteamedintothebayofGlaucus——landedatMakri——
cheerfulolddesolatevillage——theatrebythebeautifulsea-shore——
greatfertility，oleanders——apalm-treeinthemidstofthevillage，spreadingoutlikeaSultan’saigrette——sculpturedcaverns，ortombs，upthemountain——camelsoverthebridge。\"
Perhapsitisbestforamanoffancytomakehisownlandscapeoutofthesematerials：togroupthecouchedcamelsundertheplane-
trees；thelittlecrowdofwanderingraggedheathenscomedowntothecalmwater，tobeholdthenearingsteamer；tofancyamountain，inthesidesofwhichsomescoresoftombsarerudelycarved；
pillarsandporticos，andDoricentablatures。Butitisofthelittletheatrethathemustmakethemostbeautifulpicture——acharminglittleplaceoffestival，lyingoutontheshore，andlookingoverthesweetbayandtheswellingpurpleislands。Notheatre-goereverlookedoutonafairerscene。Itencouragespoetry，idleness，delicioussensualreverie。OJones！friendofmyheart！wouldyounotliketobeawhite-robedGreek，lollinglanguidly，onthecoolbencheshere，andpouringcompliments（intheIonicdialect）intotherosyearsofNeaera？InsteadofJones，yournameshouldbeIonides；insteadofasilkhat，youshouldwearachapletofrosesinyourhair：youwouldnotlistentothechorusestheyweresingingonthestage，forthevoiceofthefaironewouldbewhisperingarendezvousforthemesonuktiaishorais，andmyIonideswouldhavenoearforaughtbeside。Yonder，inthemountain，theywouldcarveaDoriccavetemple，toreceiveyoururnwhenallwasdone；andyouwouldbeaccompaniedthitherbyadirgeofthesurvivingIonidae。Thecavesofthedeadareemptynow，however，andtheirplaceknowsthemnotanymoreamongthefestalhauntsoftheliving。But，bywayofsupplyingthechoricmelodiessunghereinoldtime，oneofourcompanionsmountedonthesceneandspouted，\"MynameisNorval。\"
Onthesamedaywelaytoforawhileatanotherruinedtheatre，thatofAntiphilos。TheOxfordmen，freshwithrecollectionsofthelittle-go，boundedawayupthehillonwhichitliestotheruin，measuredthestepsofthetheatre，andcalculatedthewidthofthescene；whileothers，lessactive，watchedthemwithtelescopesfromtheship’ssides，astheyplungedinandoutofthestonesandhollows。
Twodaysafterthescenewasquitechanged。Wewereoutofsightoftheclassicalcountry，andlayinSt。George’sBay，behindahugemountain，uponwhichSt。Georgefoughtthedragon，andrescuedthelovelyLadySabra，theKingofBabylon’sdaughter。TheTurkishfleetwaslyingaboutus，commandedbythatHalilPashawhosetwochildrenthetwolastSultansmurdered。Thecrimsonflag，withthestarandcrescent，floatedatthesternofhisship。Ourdiplomatistputonhisuniformandcordons，andpaidhisExcellencyavisit。Hespokeinrapture，whenhereturned，ofthebeautyandorderoftheship，andtheurbanityoftheinfidelAdmiral。HesentusbottlesofancientCypruswinetodrink：andthecaptainofHerMajesty’sship\"Trump，\"alongsidewhichwewerelying，confirmedthatgoodopinionoftheCapitanPashawhichthereceptionoftheabovepresentledustoentertain，byrelatingmanyinstancesofhisfriendlinessandhospitalities。CaptainG-
saidtheTurkishshipswereaswellmanned，aswellkept，andaswellmanoeuvred，asanyvesselsinanyservice；andintimatedadesiretocommandaTurkishseventy-four，andaperfectwillingnesstofightheragainstaFrenchshipofthesamesize。ButI
heartilytrusthewillneitherembracetheMahometanopinions，norbecalledupontoengageanyseventy-fourwhatever。Ifhedo，letushopehewillhavehisownmentofightwith。Ifthecrewofthe\"Trump\"werealllikethecrewofthecaptain’sboat，theyneedfearnotwohundredandfiftymenoutofanycountry，withanyJoinvilleattheirhead。Wewerecarriedonshorebythisboat。
Fortwoyears，duringwhichthe\"Trump\"hadbeenlyingoffBeyrout，noneofthemenbuttheseeighthadeversetfootonshore。
Mustn’titbeahappylife？WewerelandedatthebusyquayofBeyrout，flankedbythecastlethatthefightingoldcommodorehalfbattereddown。
AlongtheBeyroutquayscivilisationflourishesundertheflagsoftheconsuls，whicharestreamingoutovertheyellowbuildingsintheclearair。HithershebringsfromEnglandherproduceofmarine-storesandwoollens，hercrockeries，herportablesoups，andherbitterale。Hithershehasbroughtpoliteness，andthelastmodesfromParis。Theywereexhibitedinthepersonofaprettylady，superintendingthegreatFrenchstore，andwho，seeingastrangersketchingonthequay，sentforwardamanwithachairtoaccommodatethatartist，andgreetedhimwithabowandasmile，suchasonlycanbefoundinFrance。ThenshefelltotalkingwithayoungFrenchofficerwithabeard，whowasgreatlysmittenwithher。TheyweremakinglovejustastheydoontheBoulevard。AnArabporterlefthisbales，andthecamelhewasunloading，tocomeandlookatthesketch。Twostumpyflat-facedTurkishsoldiers，inredcapsandwhiteundresses，peeredoverthepaper。AnoblelittleLebanoniangirl，withadeepyellowface，andcurlydun-
colouredhair，andabluetattooedchin，andforallclothingalittleraggedshiftofbluecloth，stoodbylikealittlestatue，holdingherurn，andstaredwithwonderingbrowneyes。Howmagnificentlybluethewaterwas！——howbrighttheflagsandbuildingsastheyshoneaboveit，andthelinesoftheriggingtossinginthebay！Thewhitecrestsofthebluewavesjumpedandsparkledlikequicksilver；theshadowswereasbroadandcoolasthelightswerebrilliantandrosy；thebatteredoldtowersofthecommodorelookedquitecheerfulinthedeliciousatmosphere；andthemountainsbeyondwereofanamethystcolour。TheFrenchofficerandtheladywentonchatteringquitehappilyaboutlove，thelastnewbonnet，orthebattleofIsly，orthe\"JuifErrant。\"
Howneatlyhergownandsleevesfittedherprettylittleperson！
Wehadnotseenawomanforamonth，excepthonestMrs。Flanigan，thestewardess，andtheladiesofourparty，andthetipsofthenosesoftheConstantinoplebeautiesastheypassedbyleeringfromtheiryakmacs，waddlingandplappingintheirodiousyellowpapooshes。
Andthisdayistobemarkedwithasecondwhitestone，forhavinggiventheluckywriterofthepresent，occasiontobeholdasecondbeauty。ThiswasanativeSyriandamsel，whoborethesweetnameofMariam。Soitwasshestoodastwoofus（Imentionthenumberforfearofscandal）tookherpicture。
Soitwasthatthegood-naturedblackcooklookedbehindheryoungmistress，withabenevolentgrin，thatonlytheadmirableLesliecouldpaint。
Mariamwasthesisteroftheyoungguidewhomwehiredtoshowusthroughthetown，andtoletusbecheatedinthepurchaseofgiltscarfsandhandkerchiefs，whichstrangersthinkpropertobuy。Andbeforethefollowingauthenticdrawingcouldbemade，manywerethestratagemsthewilyartistswereobligedtoemploy，tosubduetheshynessofthelittleMariam。Inthefirstplace，shewouldstandbehindthedoor（fromwhichinthedarknessherbeautifulblackeyesgleamedoutlikepennytapers）；norcouldtheentreatiesofherbrotherandmammabringherfromthathiding-place。Inordertoconciliatethelatter，webeganbymakingapictureofhertoo——
thatis，notofher，whowasanenormousoldfatwomaninyellow，quiveringalloverwithstringsofpearls，andnecklacesofsequins，andotherornaments，thewhichdescendedfromherneck，anddownheramplestomacher：wedidnotdepictthatbigoldwoman，whowouldhavebeenfrightenedatanaccuraterepresentationofherownenormity；butanidealbeing，allgraceandbeauty，dressedinhercostume，andstillsimperingbeforemeinmysketch-
booklikealadyinabookoffashions。
Thisportraitwasshowntotheoldwoman，whohandeditovertotheblackcook，who，grinning，carriedittolittleMariam——andtheresultwas，thattheyoungcreaturesteppedforward，andsubmitted；
andhascomeovertoEuropeasyousee。{2}
AverysnugandhappyfamilydidthisofMariam’sappeartobe。Ifyoucouldjudgebyallthelaughterandgiggling，bythesplendourofthewomen’sattire，bytheneatnessofthelittlehouse，prettilydecoratedwitharabesquepaintings，neatmats，andgaycarpets，theywereafamilywelltodointheBeyroutworld，andlivedwithasmuchcomfortasanyEuropeans。Theyhadonebook；
and，onthewalloftheprincipalapartment，ablackpictureoftheVirgin，whosenameisbornebyprettyMariam。
Thecamelsandthesoldiers，thebazaarsandkhans，thefountainsandawnings，whichchequer，withsuchdelightfulvarietyoflightandshade，thealleysandmarketsofanOrientaltown，aretobeseeninBeyroutinperfection；andanartistmighthereemployhimselfformonthswithadvantageandpleasure。Anewcostumewashereaddedtothemotleyandpicturesqueassemblyofdresses。Thiswasthedressoftheblue-veiledwomenfromtheLebanon，stalkingsolemnlythroughthemarkets，withhugehorns，nearayardhigh，ontheirforeheads。Forthousandsofyears，sincethetimetheHebrewprophetswrote，thesehornshavesobeenexaltedintheLebanon。
AtnightCaptainLewisgaveasplendidballandsuppertothe\"Trump。\"Wehadthe\"Trump’s\"bandtoperformthemusic；andagrandsightitwastoseethecaptainhimselfenthusiasticallyleadingonthedrum。Bluelightsandrocketswereburnedfromtheyardsofourship；whichfestivesignalswereansweredpresentlyfromthe\"Trump，\"andfromanotherEnglishvesselintheharbour。
TheymusthavestrucktheCapitanPashawithwonder，forhesenthissecretaryonboardofustoinquirewhatthefireworksmeant。
AndtheworthyTurkhadscarcelyputhisfootonthedeck，whenhefoundhimselfseizedroundthewaistbyoneofthe\"Trump’s\"
officers，andwhirlingroundthedeckinawaltz，tohisownamazement，andthehugedelightofthecompany。Hisfaceofwonderandgravity，ashewentontwirling，couldnothavebeenexceededbythatofadancingdervishatScutari；andthemannerinwhichhemanagedtoenjamberthewaltzexciteduniversalapplause。
IforgotwhetherheaccommodatedhimselftoEuropeanwayssomuchfurtherastodrinkchampagneatsupper-time；tosaythathedidwouldbetellingtalesoutofschool，andmightinterferewiththefutureadvancementofthatjollydancingTurk。
WemadeacquaintancewithanotheroftheSultan’ssubjects，who，I
fear，willhaveoccasiontodoubtofthehonouroftheEnglishnation，afterthefoultreacherywithwhichhewastreated。
Amongtheoccupiersofthelittlebazaarmatchboxes，vendorsofembroideredhandkerchiefsandotherarticlesofshowyEasternhaberdashery，wasagood-lookingneatyoungfellow，whospokeEnglishveryfluently，andwasparticularlyattentivetoallthepassengersonboardourship。Thisgentlemanwasnotonlyapocket-handkerchiefmerchantinthebazaar，butearnedafurtherlivelihoodbylettingoutmulesanddonkeys；andhekeptasmalllodging-house，orinn，fortravellers，aswewereinformed。
NowonderhespokegoodEnglish，andwasexceedinglypoliteandwell-bred；fortheworthymanhadpassedsometimeinEngland，andinthebestsocietytoo。ThathumblehaberdasheratBeyrouthadbeenalionhere，attheverybesthousesofthegreatpeople，andhadactuallymadehisappearanceatWindsor，wherehewasreceivedasaSyrianPrince，andtreatedwithgreathospitalitybyRoyaltyitself。
Idon’tknowwhatwaggishpropensitymovedoneoftheofficersofthe\"Trump\"tosaythattherewasanequerryofHisRoyalHighnessthePrinceonboard，andtopointmeoutasthedignifiedpersonageinquestion。SotheSyrianPrincewasintroducedtotheRoyalequerry，andagreatmanycomplimentspassedbetweenus。IevenhadtheaudacitytostatethatonmyverylastinterviewwithmyRoyalmaster，HisRoyalHighnesshadsaid，\"ColonelTitmarsh，whenyougotoBeyrout，youwillmakespecialinquiriesregardingmyinterestingfriendCogiaHassan。\"
PoorCogiaHassan（Iforgetwhetherthatwashisname，butitisasgoodasanother）wasoverpoweredwiththisRoyalmessage；andwehadanintimateconversationtogether，atwhichthewaggishofficerofthe\"Trump\"assistedwiththegreatestglee。
Butseetheconsequencesofdeceit！Thenextday，asweweregettingunderway，whoshouldcomeonboardbutmyfriendtheSyrianPrince，mosteagerforalastinterviewwiththeWindsorequerry；andhebeggedmetocarryhisprotestationsofunalterablefidelitytothegraciousconsortofHerMajesty。Norwasthisall。
CogiaHassanactuallyproducedagreatboxofsweetmeats，ofwhichhebeggedmyExcellencytoaccept，andalittlefigureofadolldressedinthecostumeofLebanon。Thenthepunishmentofimposturebegantobefeltseverelybyme。Howtoacceptthepoordevil’ssweetmeats？Howtorefusethem？Andasweknowthatonefibleadstoanother，soIwasobligedtosupportthefirstfalsehoodbyanother；andputtingonadignifiedair——\"CogiaHassan，\"saysI，\"Iamsurprisedyoudon’tknowthehabitsoftheBritishCourtbetter，andarenotawarethatourgraciousmastersolemnlyforbidshisservantstoacceptanysortofbacksheeshuponourtravels。\"
SoPrinceCogiaHassanwentoverthesidewithhischestofsweetmeats，butinsistedonleavingthedoll，whichmaybeworthtwopence-halfpenny；ofwhich，andofthecostumeofthewomenofLebanon，thefollowingisanaccuratelikeness：-
CHAPTERXI：ADAYANDNIGHTINSYRIA
When，afterbeingforfivewholeweeksatsea，withageneralbeliefthatattheendofafewdaysthemarinemaladyleavesyouforgood，youfindthatabriskwindandaheavyrollingswellcreateexactlythesameinwardeffectswhichtheyoccasionedattheverycommencementofthevoyage——youbegintofancythatyouareunfairlydealtwith：andI，formypart，hadthoughtofcomplainingtotheCompanyofthisatrociousviolationoftherulesoftheirprospectus；butwewereperpetuallycomingtoanchorinvariousports，atwhichintervalsofpeaceandgood-humourwererestoredtous。
Onthe3rdofOctoberourcablerushedwithahugerattleintotheblueseabeforeJaffa，atadistanceofconsiderablymorethanamileoffthetown，whichlaybeforeusveryclear，withtheflagsoftheconsulsflaringinthebrightskyandmakingacheerfulandhospitableshow。Thehousesagreatheapofsun-bakedstones，surmountedhereandtherebyminaretsandcountlesslittlewhitewasheddomes；afewdate-treesspreadouttheirfan-likeheadsoverthesedull-lookingbuildings；longsandsstretchedawayoneitherside，withlowpurplehillsbehindthem；wecouldseespecksofcamelscrawlingovertheseyellowplains；andthosepersonswhowereabouttolandhadtheleisuretobeholdthesea-sprayflashingoverthesands，andoveraheapofblackrockswhichliebeforetheentrytothetown。Theswellisverygreat，thepassagebetweentherocksnarrow，andthedangersometimesconsiderable。SotheguidebegantoentertaintheladiesandotherpassengersinthehugecountryboatwhichbroughtusfromthesteamerwithanagreeablestoryofalieutenantandeightseamenofoneofHerMajesty’sships，whowereupset，dashedtopieces，anddrownedupontheserocks，throughwhichtwomenandtwoboys，withaverymoderateportionofclothing，eachstandingandpullinghalfanoar——therewerebuttwooarsbetweenthem，andanotherbywayofrudder——wereendeavouringtoguideus。
Whenthedangeroftherocksandsurfwaspassed，cameanotherdangerofthehideousbrutesinbrownskinsandthebriefestshirts，whocametowardstheboat，straddlingthroughthewaterwithoutstretchedarms，grinningandyellingtheirArabinvitationstomounttheirshoulders。Ithinkthesefellowsfrightenedtheladiesstillmorethantherocksandthesurf；butthepoorcreatureswereobligedtosubmit；and，trembling，wereaccommodatedsomehowuponthemahoganybacksoftheseruffians，carriedthroughtheshallows，andflunguptoaledgebeforethecitygate，wherecrowdsmoreofdarkpeoplewereswarming，howlingaftertheirfashion。Thegentlemen，meanwhile，werehavingargumentsabouttheeternalbacksheeshwiththeroaringArabboatmen；andIrecallwithwonderanddelightespecially，thecursesandscreamsofonesmallandextremelyloud-lungedfellow，whoexpresseddiscontentatreceivingafive，insteadofasix-piastrepiece。Buthowisonetoknow，withoutpossessingthelanguage？Bothcoinsaremadeofagreasypewterysortoftin；andIthoughtthebiggestwasthemostvaluable：butthefellowshowedasenseoftheirvalue，andadispositionseeminglytocutanyman’sthroatwhodidnotunderstandit。Men’sthroatshavebeencutforalessdifferencebeforenow。
Beingcastupontheledge，thefirstcareofourgallantrywastolookaftertheladies，whowerescaredandastonishedbythenakedsavagebrutes，whowereshoulderingthepoorthingstoandfro；andbearingthemthroughtheseandadarkarchway，wecameintoastreetcrammedwithdonkeysandtheirpacksanddrivers，andtoweringcamelswithleeringeyeslookingintothesecond-floorrooms，andhugesplayfeet，throughwhichmesdamesetmesdemoisellesweretobeconducted。Wemadearushatthefirstopendoor，andpassedcomfortablyundertheheelsofsomehorsesgatheredunderthearchedcourt，andupastonestaircase，whichturnedouttobethatoftheRussianconsul’shouse。Hispeoplewelcomedusmostcordiallytohisabode，andtheladiesandtheluggage（objectsofoursolicitude）wereledupmanystairsandacrossseveralterracestoamostcomfortablelittleroom，underadomeofitsown，wheretherepresentativeofRussiasat。Womenwithbrownfacesanddraggle-tailedcoatsandturbans，andwonderingeyes，andnostays，andbluebeadsandgoldcoinshangingroundtheirnecks，cametogaze，astheypassed，uponthefairneatEnglishwomen。Blowsyblackcookspuffingoverfiresandthestrangestpotsandpansontheterraces，childrenpaddlingaboutinlongstripedrobes，interruptedtheirsportsorlabourstocomeandstare；andtheconsul，inhiscooldomedchamber，withalatticeoverlookingthesea，withcleanmats，andpicturesoftheEmperor，theVirgin，andSt。George，receivedthestrangerswithsmilingcourtesies，regalingtheladieswithpomegranatesandsugar，thegentlemenwithpipesoftobacco，whereofthefragranttubeswerethreeyardslong。
TheRussianamenitiesconcluded，welefttheladiesstillunderthecomfortablecooldomeoftheRussianconsulate，andwenttoseeourownrepresentative。Thestreetsofthelittletownareneitheragreeabletohorsenorfoottravellers。Manyofthestreetsaremereflightsofroughsteps，leadingabruptlyintoprivatehouses：
youpassunderarchwaysandpassagesnumberless；asteepdirtylabyrinthofstone-vaultedstablesandshedsoccupiestheground-
floorofthehabitations；andyoupassfromflattoflatoftheterraces；atvariousirregularcornersofwhich，littlechambers，withlittleprivatedomes，areerected，andthepeopleliveseeminglyasmuchupontheterraceasintheroom。
WefoundtheEnglishconsulinaqueerlittlearchedchamber，withastrangeoldpictureoftheKing’sarmstodecorateonesideofit：andheretheconsul，ademureoldman，dressedinredflowingrobes，withafeeblejanissarybearingashabbytin-mountedstaff，ormace，todenotehisoffice，receivedsuchofournationascametohimforhospitality。Hedistributedpipesandcoffeetoallandeveryone；hemadeusapresentofhishouseandallhisbedsforthenight，andwenthimselftoliequietlyontheterrace；andforallthishospitalityhedeclinedtoreceiveanyrewardfromus，andsaidhewasbutdoinghisdutyintakingusin。Thisworthyman，I
thought，mustdoubtlessbeverywellpaidbyourGovernmentformakingsuchsacrifices；butitappearsthathedoesnotgetonesinglefarthing，andthatthegreaternumberofourLevantconsulsarepaidatasimilarrateofeasyremuneration。Ifwehavebadconsularagents，havewearighttocomplain？Iftheworthygentlemencheatoccasionally，canwereasonablybeangry？Butintravellingthroughthesecountries，Englishpeople，whodon’ttakeintoconsiderationthemiserablepovertyandscantyresourcesoftheircountry，andareapttobragandbeproudofit，havetheirvanityhurtbyseeingtherepresentativesofeverynationbuttheirownwellanddecentlymaintained，andfeelashamedatsittingdownundertheshabbyprotectionofourmeanconsularflag。
Theactiveyoungmenofourpartyhadbeenonshorelongbeforeus，andseizeduponalltheavailablehorsesinthetown；butwerelieduponaletterfromHalilPasha，enjoiningallgovernorsandpashastohelpusinallways：andhearingwewerethebearersofthisdocument，thecadiandvice-governorofJaffacametowaitupontheheadofourparty；declaredthatitwashisdelightandhonourtoseteyesuponus；thathewoulddoeverythingintheworldtoserveus；thattherewerenohorses，unluckily，buthewouldsendandgetsomeinthreehours；andsoleftuswithaworldofgrinningbowsandmanychoicecomplimentsfromonesidetotheother，whichcametoeachfilteredthroughanobsequiousinterpreter。Buthourspassed，andtheclatterofhorses’hoofswasnotheard。Wehadourdinnerofeggsandflapsofbread，andthesunsetgunfired：wehadourpipesandcoffeeagain，andthenightfell。Isthismanthrowingdirtuponus？webegantothink。Ishelaughingatourbeards，andareourmothers’gravesill-treatedbythissmilingswindlingcadi？Wedeterminedtogoandseekinhisowndenthisshufflingdispenserofinfideljustice。Thistimewewouldbenomorebamboozledbycompliments；butwewouldusethelanguageofsternexpostulation，and，beingroused，wouldlettherascalheartheroaroftheindignantBritishlion；soweroseupinourwrath。
Thepoorconsulgotalampforuswithabitofwax-candle，suchasIwonderhismeanscouldafford；theshabbyjanissarymarchedaheadwithhistinmace；thetwolaquais-de-place，thattwoofourcompanyhadhired，steppedforward，eachwithanoldsabre，andwewentclatteringandstumblingdownthestreetsofthetown，inordertoseizeuponthiscadiinhisowndivan。Iwasglad，formypart（thoughoutwardlymajesticandindignantindemeanour），thatthehorseshadnotcome，andthatwehadachanceofseeingthislittlequeerglimpseofOrientallife，whichthemagistrate’sfaithlessnessprocuredforus。
AspietyforbidstheTurkstoeatduringthewearydaylighthoursoftheRamazan，theyspendtheirtimeprofitablyinsleepinguntilthewelcomesunset，whenthetownwakens：allthelanternsarelightedup；allthepipesbegintopuff，andthenarghilestobubble；allthesour-milk-and-sherbet-menbegintoyellouttheexcellenceoftheirwares；allthefrying-pansinthelittledirtycookshopsbegintofriz，andthepotstosendforthasteam：andthroughthisdingy，ragged，bustling，beggarly，cheerfulscene，webegannowtomarchtowardstheBowStreetofJaffa。Webustledthroughacrowdednarrowarchwaywhichledtothecadi’spolice-
office，enteredthelittleroom，atrociouslyperfumedwithmusk，andpassingbytherail-board，wherethecommonsortstood，mountedthestageuponwhichhisworshipandfriendssat，andsquatteddownonthedivansinsternandsilentdignity。Hishonourordereduscoffee，hiscountenanceevidentlyshowingconsiderablealarm。A
blackslave，whosedutyseemedtobetopreparethisbeverageinaside-roomwithafurnace，preparedforeachofusaboutateaspoonfuloftheliquor：hisworship’sclerk，Ipresume，atallTurkofanobleaspect，presentedittous；andhavinglappedupthelittlemodicumofdrink，theBritishlionbegantospeak。
Alltheothertravellers（saidthelionwithperfectreason）havegoodhorsesandaregone；theRussianshavegothorses，theSpaniardshavehorses，theEnglishhavehorses，butwe，wevizirsinourcountry，comingwithlettersofHalilPasha，arelaughedat，spitupon！AreHalilPasha’slettersdirt，thatyouattendtotheminthisway？AreBritishlionsdogsthatyoutreatthemso？——andsoon。Thisspeechwithmanyvariationswasmadeonoursideforaquarterofanhour；andwefinallysworethatunlessthehorseswereforthcomingwewouldwritetoHalilPashathenextmorning，andtoHisExcellencytheEnglishMinisterattheSublimePorte。
ThenyoushouldhaveheardthechorusofTurksinreply：adozenvoicesroseupfromthedivan，shouting，screaming，ejaculating，expectorating（theArabicspokenlanguageseemstorequireagreatemploymentofthetwolatteroratoricalmethods），andutteringwhatthemeekinterpreterdidnottranslatetous，butwhatIdaresaywerebynomeanscomplimentaryphrasestowardsusandournation。
Finally，thepalaverconcludedbythecadideclaringthatbythewillofHeavenhorsesshouldbeforthcomingatthreeo’clockinthemorning；andthatifnot，why，then，wemightwritetoHalilPasha。
Thisposedus，andweroseupandhaughtilytookleave。Ishouldliketoknowthatfellow’srealopinionofuslionsverymuch：andespeciallytohavehadthetranslationofthespeechesofahuge-
breechedturbanedroaringinfidel，wholookedandspokeasifhewouldhavelikedtoflingusallintothesea，whichwashoarselymurmuringunderourwindowsanaccompanimenttotheconcertwithin。
Wethenmarchedthroughthebazaars，thatwereloftyandgrim，andprettyfullofpeople。Inadesolatebrokenbuilding，somehundredsofchildrenwereplayingandsinging；inmanycornerssatpartiesovertheirwater-pipes，oneofwhomeverynowandthenwouldbegintwangingoutamostqueerchant；otherstherewereplayingatcasino——acrowdsquattedaroundthesquallinggamblers，andtalkingandlookingonwitheagerinterest。Inoneplaceofthebazaarwefoundahundredpeopleatleastlisteningtoastory-
tellerwhodeliveredhistalewithexcellentaction，voice，andvolubility：inanothertheywereplayingasortofthimble-rigwithcoffee-cups，allintentuponthegame，andtheplayerhimselfverywildlestoneofourparty，whohaddiscoveredwherethepealay，shouldtellthecompany。Thedevotionandenergywithwhichallthesepastimeswerepursued，struckmeasmuchasanything。
Thesepeoplehavebeenplayingthimble-rigandcasino；thatstory-
tellerhasbeenshoutinghistaleofAntarforfortyyears；andtheyarejustashappywiththisamusementnowaswhenfirsttheytriedit。IstherenoennuiintheEasterncountries，andareblue-devilsnotallowedtogoabroadthere？
FromthebazaarswewenttoseethehouseofMustapha，saidtobethebesthouseandthegreatestmanofJaffa。Butthegreatmanhadabscondedsuddenly，andhadfledintoEgypt。TheSultanhadmadeademanduponhimforsixteenthousandpurses，80，000l。——
Mustapharetired——theSultanpounceddownuponhishouse，andhisgoods，hishorsesandhismules。Hisharemwasdesolate。Mr。
Milnescouldhavewrittensixaffectingpoems，hadhebeenwithus，onthedarklonelinessofthatviolatedsanctuary。Wepassedfromhalltohall，terracetoterrace——afewfellowswereslumberingonthenakedfloors，andscarceturnedaswewentbythem。WeenteredMustapha’sparticulardivan——therewastheraisedfloor，butnobeardedfriendssquattingawaythenightofRamazan；therewasthelittlecoffeefurnace，butwherewastheslaveandthecoffeeandtheglowingembersofthepipes？Mustapha’sfavouritepassagesfromtheKoranwerestillpainteduponthewalls，butnobodywasthewiserforthem。Wewalkedoverasleepingnegro，andopenedthewindowswhichlookedintohisgardens。Thehorsesanddonkeys，thecamelsandmuleswerepicketedtherebelow，butwhereisthesaidMustapha？Fromthefrying-panofthePorte，hashenotfallenintothefireofMehemetAli？Andwhichisbest，tobroilortofry？Ifitbebuttoreadthe\"ArabianNights\"againongettinghome，itisgoodtohavemadethislittlevoyageandseenthesestrangeplacesandfaces。
Thenwewentoutthroughthearchedloweringgatewayofthetownintotheplainbeyond，andthatwasanotherfamousandbrilliantsceneofthe\"ArabianNights。\"Theheavenshonewithamarvellousbrilliancy——theplaindisappearedfarinthehaze——thetowersandbattlementsofthetownroseblackagainstthesky——oldoutlandishtreesroseuphereandthere——clumpsofcamelswerecouchedintherareherbage——dogswerebayingabout——groupsofmenlaysleepingundertheirhaicksroundabout——roundaboutthetallgatesmanylightsweretwinkling——andtheybroughtuswater-pipesandsherbet——
andwewonderedtothinkthatLondonwasonlythreeweeksoff。
Thencamethenightattheconsul’s。Thepoordemureoldgentlemanbroughtouthismattresses；andtheladiessleepingroundonthedivans，welaydownquitehappy；andIformypartintendedtomakeasdelightfuldreamsasAlnaschar；but——lo，thedelicatemosquitosoundedhishorn：theactivefleajumpedup，andcametofeastonChristianflesh（theEasternfleabitesmorebitterlythanthemostsavagebuginChristendom），andthebug——oh，theaccursed！Whywashemade？Whatdutyhasthatinfamousruffiantoperformintheworld，savetomakepeoplewretched？OnlyBulwerinhismostpatheticstylecoulddescribethemiseriesofthatnight——themoaning，thegroaning，thecursing，thetumbling，theblistering，theinfamousdespairanddegradation！IheardallthecocksinJaffacrow；thechildrencrying，andthemothershushingthem；thedonkeysbrayingfitfullyinthemoonlight；atlastIheardtheclatterofhoofsbelow，andthehailingofmen。Itwasthreeo’clock，thehorseswereactuallycome；nay，therewerecamelslikewise；assesandmules，pack-saddlesanddrivers，allbustlingtogetherunderthemoonlightinthecheerfulstreet——andthefirstnightinSyriawasover。
CHAPTERXII：FROMJAFFATOJERUSALEM
Ittookanhourormoretogetourlittlecaravanintomarchingorder，toaccommodateallthepackstothehorses，thehorsestotheriders；toseetheladiescomfortablyplacedintheirlitter，withasleekandlargeblackmuleforeandaft，agroomtoeachmule，andatallandexceedinglygood-naturedandmahogany-colouredinfideltowalkbythesideofthecarriage，tobalanceitasitswayedtoandfro，andtoofferhisbackasasteptotheinmateswhenevertheyweremindedtoascendoralight。Thesethreefellows，fastingthroughtheRamazan，andoverasrougharoad，forthegreaterpart，asevershookmortalbones，performedtheirfourteenhours’walkofnearfortymileswiththemostadmirablecourage，alacrity，andgood-humour。Theyonceortwicedrankwateronthemarch，andsofarinfringedtherule；buttheyrefusedallbreadorediblerefreshmentofferedtothem，andtuggedonwithanenergythatthebestcamel，andIamsurethebestChristian，mightenvy。Whatalessonofgood-humouredenduranceitwastocertainPallMallSardanapaluses，whogrumbleifclubsofacushionsarenotsoftenough！
IfIcouldwritesonnetsatleisure，IwouldliketochronicleinfourteenlinesmysensationsonfindingmyselfonahighTurkishsaddle，withapairoffire-shovelstirrupsandworstedreins，redpaddedsaddle-cloth，andinnumerabletags，fringes，glass-beads，endsofrope，todecoratetheharnessofthehorse，thegallantsteedonwhichIwasabouttogallopintoSyrianlife。Whatafigurewecutinthemoonlight，andhowtheywouldhavestaredintheStrand！Ay，orinLeicestershire，whereIwarrantsuchahorseandriderarenotoftenvisible！Theshovelstirrupsaredeucedlyshort；theclumsyleatherscuttheshinsofsomeequestriansabominably；yousitoveryourhorseasitwereonatower，fromwhichthedescentwouldbeveryeasy，butforthebigpeakofthesaddle。Agoodwayfortheinexperiencedistoputastickorumbrellaacrossthesaddlepeakagain，sothatitisnexttoimpossibletogooveryourhorse’sneck。Ifoundthisavastcomfortingoingdownthehills，andrecommenditconscientiouslytootherdearsimplebrethrenofthecity。
Peacefulmen，wedidnotornamentourgirdleswithpistols，yataghans，&c。，suchassomepilgrimsappearedtobristlealloverwith；andasalessontosuchrashpeople，astorymaybetoldwhichwasnarratedtousatJerusalem，andcarriesawholesomemoral。TheHonourableHogginArmer，whowaslatelytravellingintheEast，woreabouthisstomachtwobraceofpistols，ofsuchexquisitefinishandmake，thataSheikh，intheJerichocountry，robbedhimmerelyforthesakeofthepistols。Idon’tknowwhetherhehastoldthestorytohisfriendsathome。
AnotherstoryaboutSheikhsmayherebetoldapropos。ThatcelebratedIrishPeer，LordOldgent（whowasdistinguishedintheBuckinghamshireDragoons），havingpaidasortofblackmailtotheSheikhofJerichocountry，wassuddenlysetuponbyanotherSheikh，whoclaimedtobetherealJerichoniangovernor；andthesetwinsquarrelledoverthebodyofLordOldgent，asthewidowsfortheinnocentbabybeforeSolomon。Therewasenoughforboth——butthesedigressionsareinterminable。
Thepartygotunderwayatnearfouro’clock：theladiesinthelitter，theFrenchfemme-de-chambremanfullycaracolingonagreyhorse；thecavaliers，likeyourhumbleservant，ontheirhighsaddles；thedomestics，flunkeys，guides，andgrooms，onallsortsofanimals，——somefourteeninall。Addtothese，twomostgraveandstatelyArabsinwhitebeards，whiteturbans，whitehaicksandraiments；sabrescurlingroundtheirmilitarythighs，andimmenselonggunsattheirbacks。MorevenerablewarriorsIneversaw；
theywentbythesideofthelittersoberlyprancing。Whenweemergedfromthesteepclatteringstreetsofthecityintothegreyplains，lightedbythemoonandstarlight，thesemilitariesrodeonward，leadingthewaythroughthehugeavenuesofstrangediabolical-lookingpricklypears（plantsthatlookasiftheyhadgrowninTartarus），bywhichthefirstmileortwoofroutefromthecityisbounded；andasthedawnarosebeforeus，exhibitingfirstastreakofgrey，thenofgreen，thenofredinthesky，itwasfinetoseethesemartialfiguresdefinedagainsttherisinglight。Thesightofthatlittlecavalcade，andofthenaturearoundit，willalwaysremainwithme，Ithink，asoneofthefreshestandmostdelightfulsensationsIhaveenjoyedsincethedayIfirstsawCalaispier。ItwasfulldaywhentheygavetheirhorsesadrinkatalargeprettyOrientalfountain，andthenpresentlyweenteredtheopenplain——thefamousplainofSharon——sofruitfulinrosesonce，nowhardlycultivated，butalwaysbeautifulandnoble。
Herepresently，inthedistance，wesawanothercavalcadeprickingovertheplain。Ourtwowhitewarriorsspreadtotherightandleft，andgallopedtoreconnoitre。We，too，putoursteedstothecanter，andhandlingourumbrellasasRicharddidhislanceagainstSaladin，wentundauntedtochallengethiscaravan。Thefactis，wecoulddistinguishthatitwasformedofthepartyofourpiousfriendsthePoles，andwehailedthemwithcheerfulshouting，andpresentlythetwocaravansjoinedcompany，andscouredtheplainattherateofnearfourmilesperhour。Thehorse-master，acourierofthiscompany，rodethreemilesforourone。Hewasabroken-
nosedArab，withpistols，asabre，afusee，ayellowDamascusclothflappingoverhishead，andhisnoseornamentedwithdiachylon。Herodeahog-neckedgreyArab，bristlingoverwithharness，andjumped，andwhirled，andreared，andhalted，totheadmirationofall。
ScarcehadthediachylonianArabfinishedhisevolutions，whenlo！
yetanothercloudofdustwasseen，andanotherpartyofarmedandglitteringhorsemenappeared。They，too，wereledbyanArab，whowasfollowedbytwojanissaries，withsilvermacesshininginthesun。’TwasthepartyofthenewAmericanConsul-GeneralofSyriaandJerusalem，hasteningtothatcity，withtheinferiorconsulsofRamlehandJaffatoescorthim。HeexpectstoseetheMillenniuminthreeyears，andhasacceptedtheofficeofconsulatJerusalem，soastobeonthespotinreadiness。
WhenthediachylonArabsawtheAmericanArab，hestraightwaygallopedhissteedtowardshim，tookhispipe，whichhedeliveredathisadversaryinguiseofajereed，andgallopedroundandround，andinandout，andthereandbackagain，asinaplayofwar。TheAmericanrepliedinasimilarplayfulferocity——thetwowarriorsmadealittletournamentforusthereontheplainsbeforeJaffa，inthewhichdiachylon，beingalittleworsted，challengedhisadversarytoarace，andfledawayonhisgrey，theAmericanfollowingonhisbay。Herepoorsticking-plasterwasagainworsted，theYankeecontemptuouslyridingroundhim，andthendecliningfurtherexercise。
Whatmorecouldmortalmanwant？Atroopofknightsandpaladinscouldhavedonenomore。InnopageofWalterScotthaveIreadascenemorefairandsparkling。Thesoberwarriorsofourescortdidnotjoininthegambolsoftheyoungmen。Theretheyrodesoberly，intheirwhiteturbans，bytheirladies’litter，theirlonggunsrisingupbehindthem。
Therewasnolackofcompanyalongtheroad：donkeysnumberless，camelsbytwosandthrees；nowamule-driver，trudgingalongtheroad，chantingamostqueermelody；nowalady，inwhiteveil，blackmask，andyellowpapooshes，bestridingherass，andfollowedbyherhusband，——metusontheway；andmostpeoplegaveasalutation。PresentlywesawRamleh，inasmokingmist，ontheplainbeforeus，flankedtotherightbyatalllonelytower，thatmighthaveheldthebellsofsomemoutierofCaenorEvreux。Asweentered，aboutthreehoursandahalfafterstarting，amongthewhitedomesandstonehousesofthelittletown，wepassedtheplaceoftombs。Twowomenweresittingononeofthem，——theonebendingherheadtowardsthestone，androckingtoandfro，andmoaningoutaverysweetpitifullamentation。TheAmericanconsulinvitedustobreakfastatthehouseofhissubaltern，thehospitableone-eyedArmenian，whorepresentstheUnitedStatesatJaffa。Thestarsandstripeswereflauntingoverhisterraces，towhichweascended，leavingourhorsestothecareofamultitudeofroaringraggedArabsbeneath，whotookchargeofandfedtheanimals，thoughIcan’tsayintheleastwhy；but，inthesamewayasgettingoffmyhorseonenteringJerusalem，Igavethereinintothehandofthefirstpersonnearme，andhaveneverheardoftheworthybrutesince。AttheAmericanconsul’swewereservedfirstwithricesoupinpishpash，flavouredwithcinnamonandspice；thenwithboiledmutton，thenwithsteweddittoandtomatoes；thenwithfowlsswimmingingrease；thenwithbrownragoutsbelabouredwithonions；thenwithasmokingpilaffofrice：severalofwhichdishesIcanpronouncetobeofexcellentmaterialandflavour。
Whenthegentryhadconcludedthisrepast，itwashandedtoasidetable，wherethecommonaltyspeedilydiscussedit。Weleftthemlickingtheirfingersaswehastenedawayuponthesecondpartoftheride。
AndaswequittedRamleh，thescenerylostthatsweetandpeacefullookwhichcharacterisestheprettyplainwehadtraversed；andthesun，too，risingintheheaven，dissipatedallthosefreshbeautifultintsinwhichGod’sworldisclothedofearlymorning，andwhichcitypeoplehavesoseldomthechanceofbeholding。Theplainoverwhichwerodelookedyellowandgloomy；thecultivationlittleornone；thelandacrosstheroadsidefringed，forthemostpart，withstragglingwild-carrotplants；apatchofgreenonlyhereandthere。Wepassedseveralherdsoflean，small，well-
conditionedcattle：manyflocksofblackgoats，tendednowandthenbyaraggednegroshepherd，hislonggunslungoverhisback，hishandoverhiseyestoshadethemashestaredatourlittlecavalcade。Mostofthehalf-nakedcountryfolkswemethadthisdismalappendagetoEasternrusticlife；andtheweaponcouldhardlybeoneofmeredefence，for，beyondthefadedskull-cap，ortatteredcoatofblueordirtywhite，thebrawny，brown-chested，solemn-lookingfellowshadnothingseeminglytoguard。Asbefore，therewasnolackoftravellersontheroad：moredonkeystrottedby，lookingsleekandstrong；camelssinglyandbypairs，ladenwithalittlehumbleraggedmerchandise，ontheirwaybetweenthetwotowns。AboutnoonwehaltedeagerlyatashortdistancefromanArabvillageandwell，whereallweregladofadrinkoffreshwater。Avillageofbeavers，oracolonyofants，makehabitationsnotunlikethesedismalhutspiledtogetherontheplainhere。
Therewerenosinglehutsalongthewholelineofroad；poorandwretchedastheyare，theFellahshuddlealltogetherforprotectionfromtheotherthievestheirneighbours。Thegovernment（whichwerestoredtothem）hasnopowertoprotectthem，andisonlystrongenoughtorobthem。Thewomen，withtheirlongbluegownsandraggedveils，cametoandfrowithpitchersontheirheads。RebeccahadsuchanonewhenshebroughtdrinktothelieutenantofAbraham。Theboyscamestaringround，bawlingafteruswiththeirfathersfortheinevitablebacksheesh。Thevillagedogsbarkedroundtheflocks，astheyweredriventowaterorpasture。
Wesawagloomy，notverylofty-lookingridgeofhillsinfrontofus；thehighestofwhichtheguidepointingouttous，toldusthatfromitweshouldseeJerusalem。Itlookedverynear，andweallsetupatrotofenthusiasmtogetintothishillcountry。
Butthatburstofenthusiasm（itmayhavecarriedusnearlyaquarterofamileinthreeminutes）wassoondestinedtobecheckedbythedisagreeablenatureofthecountrywehadtotraverse。
Beforewegottotherealmountaindistrict，wewereinamannerpreparedforit，bythemountinganddescentofseverallonelyoutlyinghills，upanddownwhichourroughstonytrackwound。
Thenweenteredthehilldistrict，andourpathlaythroughtheclatteringbedofanancientstream，whosebrawlingwatershaverolledawayintothepast，alongwiththefierceandturbulentracewhoonceinhabitedthesesavagehills。Theremayhavebeencultivationheretwothousandyearsago。Themountains，orhugestonymoundsenvironingthisroughpath，havelevelridgesallthewayuptotheirsummits；ontheseparallelledgesthereisstillsomeverdureandsoil：whenwaterflowedhere，andthecountrywasthrongedwiththatextraordinarypopulation，which，accordingtotheSacredHistories，wascrowdedintotheregion，thesemountainstepsmayhavebeengardensandvineyards，suchasweseenowthrivingalongthehillsoftheRhine。Nowthedistrictisquitedeserted，andyourideamongwhatseemtobesomanypetrifiedwaterfalls。Wesawnoanimalsmovingamongthestonybrakes；
scarcelyevenadozenlittlebirdsinthewholecourseoftheride。
ThesparrowsareallatJerusalem，amongthehousetops，wheretheirceaselesschirpingandtwitteringformsthemostcheerfulsoundoftheplace。
ThecompanyofPoles，thecompanyofOxfordmen，andthelittleAmericanarmy，travelledtooquickforourcaravan，whichwasmadetofollowtheslowprogressoftheladies’litter，andwehadtomakethejourneythroughthemountainsinaverysmallnumber。Notoneofourpartyhadasingleweaponmoredreadfulthananumbrella：andacoupleofArabs，wickedlyinclined，mighthavebroughtusalltothehalt，andrifledeverycarpet-bagandpocketbelongingtous。NorcanIsaythatwejourneyedwithoutcertainqualmsoffear。Whenswarthyfellows，withgirdlesfullofpistolsandyataghans，passeduswithoutunslingingtheirlongguns——whenscowlingcamel-riders，withawfullongbendinglances，decoratedwithtuftsofrags，orsavageplumesofscarletfeathers，wentbywithoutmolestation——Ithinkwewererathergladthattheydidnotstopandparley：for，afterall，aBritishlionwithanumbrellaisnomatchforanArabwithhisinfernallonggun。What，too，wouldhavebecomeofourwomen？Sowetriedtothinkthatitwasentirelyoutofanxietyforthemthatwewereinclinedtopushon。
Thereisashadyresting-placeandvillageinthemidstofthemountaindistrictwherethetravellersareaccustomedtohaltforanhour’sreposeandrefreshment；andtheothercaravanswerejustquittingthisspot，havingenjoyeditscoolshadesandwaters，whenwecameup。Shouldwestop？Regardfortheladies（ofcoursenootherearthlyconsideration）madeussay，\"No！\"Whatadmirableself-denialandchivalrousdevotion！Soourpoordevilsofmulesandhorsesgotnorestandnowater，ourpantinglitter-mennobreathingtime，andwestaggereddesperatelyaftertheprocessionaheadofus。Itwoundupthemountaininfrontofus：thePoleswiththeirgunsandattendants，theAmericanwithhisjanissaries；
fiftyorsixtyallridingslowlyliketheprocessionin\"Bluebeard。\"
Butalas，theyheadedusverysoon；whenwegotupthewearyhilltheywerealloutofsight。PerhapsthoughtsofFleetStreetdidcrossthemindsofsomeofusthen，andavaguedesiretoseeafewpolicemen。Thedistrictnowseemedpeopled，andwithanuglyrace。
Savagepersonagespeeredatusoutofhuts，andgrimholesintherocks。Themulesbegantoloitermostabominably——waterthemuleteersmusthave——and，behold，wecametoapleasant-lookingvillageoftreesstandingonahill；childrenwereshakingfigsfromthetrees——womenweregoingabout——beforeuswasthemosqueofaholyman——thevillage，lookinglikeacollectionoflittleforts，roseuponthehilltoourright，withalongviewofthefieldsandgardensstretchingfromit，andcamelsarrivingwiththeirburdens。Herewemuststop；Paolo，thechiefservant，knewtheSheikhofthevillage——heverygoodman——givehimwaterandsupper——
waterverygoodhere——infactwebegantothinkoftheproprietyofhaltinghereforthenight，andmakingourentryintoJerusalemonthenextday。