Therehadbeensomethingremarkablyamiableabouther。
FannyinthoseearlydayshadpreferredhertoSusan；
andwhenthenewsofherdeathhadatlastreachedMansfield，hadforashorttimebeenquiteafflicted。ThesightofBetseybroughttheimageoflittleMarybackagain，butshewouldnothavepainedhermotherbyalludingtoherfortheworld。Whileconsideringherwiththeseideas，Betsey，atasmalldistance，washoldingoutsomethingtocatchhereyes，meaningtoscreenitatthesametimefromSusan’s。
“Whathaveyougotthere，mylove？“saidFanny；
“comeandshewittome。“
Itwasasilverknife。UpjumpedSusan，claimingitasherown，andtryingtogetitaway；butthechildrantohermother’sprotection，andSusancouldonlyreproach，whichshedidverywarmly，andevidentlyhopingtointerestFannyonherside。“Itwasveryhardthatshewasnottohaveher_own_knife；itwasherownknife；
littlesisterMaryhadleftittoheruponherdeathbed，andsheoughttohavehadittokeepherselflongago。
Butmamakeptitfromher，andwasalwayslettingBetseygetholdofit；andtheendofitwouldbethatBetseywouldspoilit，andgetitforherown，thoughmamahad_promised_herthatBetseyshouldnothaveitinherownhands。“
Fannywasquiteshocked。Everyfeelingofduty，honour，andtendernesswaswoundedbyhersister’sspeechandhermother’sreply。
“Now，Susan，“criedMrs。Price，inacomplainingvoice，“now，howcanyoubesocross？Youarealwaysquarrellingaboutthatknife。Iwishyouwouldnotbesoquarrelsome。
PoorlittleBetsey；howcrossSusanistoyou!Butyoushouldnothavetakenitout，mydear，whenIsentyoutothedrawer。YouknowItoldyounottotouchit，becauseSusanissocrossaboutit。Imusthideitanothertime，Betsey。PoorMarylittlethoughtitwouldbesuchaboneofcontentionwhenshegaveitmetokeep，onlytwohoursbeforeshedied。Poorlittlesoul!shecouldbutjustspeaktobeheard，andshesaidsoprettily，“LetsisterSusanhavemyknife，mama，whenIamdeadandburied。“
Poorlittledear!shewassofondofit，Fanny，thatshewouldhaveitlaybyherinbed，allthroughherillness。
Itwasthegiftofhergoodgodmother，oldMrs。AdmiralMaxwell，onlysixweeksbeforeshewastakenfordeath。
Poorlittlesweetcreature!Well，shewastakenawayfromeviltocome。MyownBetsey“fondlingher，“_you_havenottheluckofsuchagoodgodmother。
AuntNorrislivestoofarofftothinkofsuchlittlepeopleasyou。“
FannyhadindeednothingtoconveyfromauntNorris，butamessagetosayshehopedthathergod-daughterwasagoodgirl，andlearntherbook。Therehadbeenatonemomentaslightmurmurinthedrawing-roomatMansfieldParkaboutsendingheraprayer-book；
butnosecondsoundhadbeenheardofsuchapurpose。
Mrs。Norris，however，hadgonehomeandtakendowntwooldprayer-booksofherhusbandwiththatidea；but，uponexamination，theardourofgenerositywentoff。
Onewasfoundtohavetoosmallaprintforachild’seyes，andtheothertobetoocumbersomeforhertocarryabout。
Fanny，fatiguedandfatiguedagain，wasthankfultoacceptthefirstinvitationofgoingtobed；andbeforeBetseyhadfinishedhercryatbeingallowedtosituponlyonehourextraordinaryinhonourofsister，shewasoff，leavingallbelowinconfusionandnoiseagain；theboysbeggingfortoastedcheese，herfathercallingoutforhisrumandwater，andRebeccaneverwheresheoughttobe。
TherewasnothingtoraiseherspiritsintheconfinedandscantilyfurnishedchamberthatshewastosharewithSusan。Thesmallnessoftheroomsaboveandbelow，indeed，andthenarrownessofthepassageandstaircase，struckherbeyondherimagination。ShesoonlearnedtothinkwithrespectofherownlittleatticatMansfieldPark，inthathousereckonedtoosmallforanybody’scomfort。
Chapter39CHAPTERXXXIX
CouldSirThomashaveseenallhisniece’sfeelings，whenshewroteherfirstlettertoheraunt，hewouldnothavedespaired；forthoughagoodnight’srest，apleasantmorning，thehopeofsoonseeingWilliamagain，andthecomparativelyquietstateofthehouse，fromTomandCharlesbeinggonetoschool，Samonsomeprojectofhisown，andherfatheronhisusuallounges，enabledhertoexpressherselfcheerfullyonthesubjectofhome，therewerestill，toherownperfectconsciousness，manydrawbackssuppressed。Couldhehaveseenonlyhalfthatshefeltbeforetheendofaweek，hewouldhavethoughtMr。Crawfordsureofher，andbeendelightedwithhisownsagacity。
Beforetheweekended，itwasalldisappointment。
Inthefirstplace，Williamwasgone。TheThrushhadhadherorders，thewindhadchanged，andhewassailedwithinfourdaysfromtheirreachingPortsmouth；
andduringthosedaysshehadseenhimonlytwice，inashortandhurriedway，whenhehadcomeashoreonduty。Therehadbeennofreeconversation，nowalkontheramparts，novisittothedockyard，noacquaintancewiththeThrush，nothingofallthattheyhadplannedanddependedon。Everythinginthatquarterfailedher，exceptWilliam’saffection。Hislastthoughtonleavinghomewasforher。Hesteppedbackagaintothedoortosay，“TakecareofFanny，mother。Sheistender，andnotusedtoroughitliketherestofus。Ichargeyou，takecareofFanny。“
Williamwasgone：andthehomehehadleftherinwas，Fannycouldnotconcealitfromherself，inalmosteveryrespecttheveryreverseofwhatshecouldhavewished。
Itwastheabodeofnoise，disorder，andimpropriety。
Nobodywasintheirrightplace，nothingwasdoneasitoughttobe。Shecouldnotrespectherparentsasshehadhoped。
Onherfather，herconfidencehadnotbeensanguine，buthewasmorenegligentofhisfamily，hishabitswereworse，andhismannerscoarser，thanshehadbeenpreparedfor。
Hedidnotwantabilitiesbuthehadnocuriosity，andnoinformationbeyondhisprofession；hereadonlythenewspaperandthenavy-list；hetalkedonlyofthedockyard，theharbour，Spithead，andtheMotherbank；
hesworeandhedrank，hewasdirtyandgross。
Shehadneverbeenabletorecallanythingapproachingtotendernessinhisformertreatmentofherself。
Therehadremainedonlyageneralimpressionofroughnessandloudness；andnowhescarcelyevernoticedher，buttomakehertheobjectofacoarsejoke。
Herdisappointmentinhermotherwasgreater：
_there_shehadhopedmuch，andfoundalmostnothing。
Everyflatteringschemeofbeingofconsequencetohersoonfelltotheground。Mrs。Pricewasnotunkind；
but，insteadofgainingonheraffectionandconfidence，andbecomingmoreandmoredear，herdaughternevermetwithgreaterkindnessfromherthanonthefirstdayofherarrival。Theinstinctofnaturewassoonsatisfied，andMrs。Price’sattachmenthadnoothersource。
Herheartandhertimewerealreadyquitefull；
shehadneitherleisurenoraffectiontobestowonFanny。
Herdaughtersneverhadbeenmuchtoher。Shewasfondofhersons，especiallyofWilliam，butBetseywasthefirstofhergirlswhomshehadevermuchregarded。Tohershewasmostinjudiciouslyindulgent。Williamwasherpride；
Betseyherdarling；andJohn，Richard，Sam，Tom，andCharlesoccupiedalltherestofhermaternalsolicitude，alternatelyherworriesandhercomforts。Thesesharedherheart：
hertimewasgivenchieflytoherhouseandherservants。
Herdayswerespentinakindofslowbustle；allwasbusywithoutgettingon，alwaysbehindhandandlamentingit，withoutalteringherways；wishingtobeaneconomist，withoutcontrivanceorregularity；dissatisfiedwithherservants，withoutskilltomakethembetter，andwhetherhelping，orreprimanding，orindulgingthem，withoutanypowerofengagingtheirrespect。
Ofhertwosisters，Mrs。PriceverymuchmoreresembledLadyBertramthanMrs。Norris。Shewasamanagerbynecessity，withoutanyofMrs。Norris’sinclinationforit，oranyofheractivity。Herdispositionwasnaturallyeasyandindolent，likeLadyBertram’s；andasituationofsimilaraffluenceanddo-nothingnesswouldhavebeenmuchmoresuitedtohercapacitythantheexertionsandself-denialsoftheonewhichherimprudentmarriagehadplacedherin。
ShemighthavemadejustasgoodawomanofconsequenceasLadyBertram，butMrs。Norriswouldhavebeenamorerespectablemotherofninechildrenonasmallincome。
MuchofallthisFannycouldnotbutbesensibleof。
Shemightscrupletomakeuseofthewords，butshemustanddidfeelthathermotherwasapartial，ill-judgingparent，adawdle，aslattern，whoneithertaughtnorrestrainedherchildren，whosehousewasthesceneofmismanagementanddiscomfortfrombeginningtoend，andwhohadnotalent，noconversation，noaffectiontowardsherself；nocuriositytoknowherbetter，nodesireofherfriendship，andnoinclinationforhercompanythatcouldlessenhersenseofsuchfeelings。
Fannywasveryanxioustobeuseful，andnottoappearaboveherhome，orinanywaydisqualifiedordisinclined，byherforeigneducation，fromcontributingherhelptoitscomforts，andthereforesetaboutworkingforSamimmediately；
andbyworkingearlyandlate，withperseveranceandgreatdespatch，didsomuchthattheboywasshippedoffatlast，withmorethanhalfhislinenready。
Shehadgreatpleasureinfeelingherusefulness，butcouldnotconceivehowtheywouldhavemanagedwithouther。