第40章
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  or,presentlyagain,“Ineverhadsuchanidea!“Andhermindopenedwithdelighttothesenewthingswhichcamefromtheman’smindsosimpleanddirect。ToBrowningtheydidcomeback,buttheVirginian,thoughinterested,conceivedadislikeforhim。

  “Heisasmarty,“saidhe,onceortwice。

  “Nowhereissomething,“saidMolly。“Ihaveneverknownwhattothink。“

  “Oh,Heavens!“murmuredthesickman,smiling。“Isitshort?“

  “Veryshort。Nowpleaseattend。“Andshereadhimtwelvelinesaboutaloverwhorowedtoabeachinthedusk,crossedafield,tappedatapane,andwasadmitted。

  “Thatisthebestyet,“saidtheVirginian。“There’sonlyonethingyu’canthinkaboutthat。“

  “Butwait,“saidthegirl,swiftly。“Hereishowtheyparted:——

  “Roundthecapeofasuddencamethesea,Andthesunlookedoverthemountain’srim——

  Andstraightwasapathofgoldforhim,Andtheneedofaworldofmenforme。“

  “Thatisvery,verytrue,“murmuredtheVirginian,droppinghiseyesfromthegirl’sintentones。

  “Hadtheyquarrelled?“sheinquired。

  “Oh,no!“

  “But——“

  “Ireckonhelovedherverymuch。“

  “Thenyou’resuretheyhadn’tquarrelled?“

  “Deadsure,ma’am。Hewouldcomebackaftehhehadplayedsomemoreofthegame。“

  “Thegame?“

  “Life,ma’am。Whateverhewasa-doin’intheworldofmen。That’sabed-rockpiece,ma’am!“

  “Well,Idon’tseewhyyouthinkit’ssomuchbetterthansomeoftheothers。“

  “Icouldsca’celyexplain,“answeredtheman。“Butthatwriterdoesknowsomething。“

  “Iamgladtheyhadn’tquarrelled,“saidMolly,thoughtfully。Andshebegantolikehavingheropinionsrefuted。

  Hisbandages,becomingalittleirksome,hadtobeshifted,andthisturnedtheirdiscoursefromliteraturetoWyoming;andMollyinquired,hadheeverbeenshotbefore?Onlyonce,hetoldher。

  “Ihavebeenluckyinhavingfewfusses,“saidhe。“Ihatethem。

  Ifamanhastobekilled——“

  “Younever——“brokeinMolly。Shehadstartedbackalittle。

  “Well,“sheaddedhastilydon’ttellmeif——“

  “Ishouldn’twonderifIgotoneofthoseIndians,“hesaidquietly。“ButIwasn’twaitin’tosee!ButIcamemightyneardoingforawhitemanthatday。Hehadbeenhurtin’ahawss。

  “Hurting?“saidMolly。

  “Injurin。’Iwillnottellyu’aboutthat。Itwouldhurtyu’tohearsuchthings。Buthawsses——don’ttheydependonus?Ain’ttheysomethin’likechildren?Ididnotlayupthemanverybad。

  Hewasabletotravel’mostrightaway。Why,you’dhavewantedtokillhimyourself!“

  SotheVirginiantalked,norknewwhathewasdoingtothegirl。

  NorwassheawareofwhatshewasreceivingfromhimasheunwittinglyspokehimselfouttoherintheseBrowningmeetingstheyhealeachday。ButMrs。Taylorgrewpleased。Thekindlydamewouldsometimescrosstheroadtoseeifshewereneeded,andstealawayagainafterapeepatthewindow。There,inside,amongtherestoredhometreasures,satthetwo:therosyalertgirl,sweetasshetalkedorreadtohim;andhe,thegrave,half-weakgiantamonghiswraps,watchingher。

  Ofherdelayedhomevisitheneveragainspoke,eithertoherortoMrs。Taylor;andMollyveeredasidefromanytrendoftalksheforesawwasleadingtowardthatsubject。Butinthosehourswhennovisitorscame,andhewasbyhimselfinthequiet,hewouldlieoftensombrelycontemplatingthegirl’sroom,herlittledaintyknickknacks,herhomephotographs,allthedelicatemanifestationsofwhatshecamefromandwhatshewas。Strengthwasflowingbackintohimeachday,andJudgeHenry’slatestmessengerhadbroughthimclothesandmailfromSunkCreekandmanyinquiriesofkindness,andreturnedtakingthenewsofthecow-puncher’simprovement,andhowsoonhewouldbepermittedthefreshair。HenceMollyfoundhimwaitinginaflannelshirtofhighlybecomingshade,andwithasilkhandkerchiefknottedroundhisthroat;andhetoldheritwasgoodtofeelrespectableagain。

  Shehadcometoreadtohimfortheallottedtime;andshethrewaroundhisshouldersthescarletandblackNavajoblanket,stripedwithitssplendidzigzagsofbarbarity。Thushehalfsat,halfleaned,languidbutatease。Inhislaplayoneofthelettersbroughtoverbythemessenger:andthoughshewasmidwayinabookthatengagedhisfullattention——DAVIDCOPPERFELD——hissilenceandabsentlookthismorningstoppedher,andsheaccusedhimofnotattending。

  “No,“headmitted;“Iamthinkingofsomethingelse。“

  Shelookedathimwiththatapprehensionwhichheknew。

  “Ithadtocome,“saidhe。“Andto-dayIseemythoughtsstraighterthanI’vebeenuptomanagingsince——sincemyhardgotclear。AndnowImustsaythesethoughts——ifIcan,ifIcan!“Hestopped。Hiseyeswereintentuponher;onehandwasgrippingthearmofhischair。

  “Youpromised——“trembledMolly。

  “Ipromisedyoushouldloveme,“hesternlyinterrupted。

  “Promisedthattomyself。Ihavebrokenthatword。“

  SheshutDAVIDCOPPERHEADmechanically,andgrewwhite。

  “Yourletterhascometomehyeh,“hecontinued,gentleagain。

  “My——“Shehadforgottenit。

  “Theletteryouwrotetotellmegood-by。Youwroteitalittlewhileago——notamonthyet,butit’sawayandawaylonggoneforme。“

  “Ihaveneverletyouknow——“beganMolly。

  “Thedoctor,“heinterruptedoncemore,butverygentlynow,“hegaveawdehsImustbekeptquiet。Ireckonyu’thoughttellin’memight——“

  “Forgiveme!“criedthegirl。“IndeedIoughttohavetoldyousooner!IndeedIhadnoexcuse!“

  “Why,shouldyu’tellmeifyu’preferrednot?Youhadwritten。

  Andyouspeak“heliftedtheletter“ofneverbeingabletorepaykindness;butyouhaveturnedthetables。Icanneverrepayyoubyanything!byanything!SoIhadfiguredIwouldjustjogbacktoSunkCreekandletyougetaway,ifyoudidnotwanttosaythatkindofgood-by。ForIsawtheboxes。Mrs。Tayloristooniceawomantoknowthetrickoflyin’,andshecouldnotdeceiveme。Ihaveknowedyu’weregoingawayforgoodeversinceIsawthoseboxes。Butnowhyehcomesyourletter,anditseemsnowaybutImustspeak。Ihavethoughtadeal,lyin’inthisroom。And——to-day——IcansaywhatIhavethought。Icouldnotmakeyouhappy。“Hestopped,butshedidnotanswer。Hisvoicehadgrownsofterthanwhispering,butyetwasnotawhisper。Fromitsquietsyllablessheturnedaway,blindedwithsuddentears。

  “Once,Ithoughtlovemustsurelybeenough,“hecontinued。“AndIthoughtifIcouldmakeyouloveme,youcouldlearnmetobeless——less-moreyourkind。AndIthinkIcouldgiveyouaprettygoodsortoflove。Butthatdon’thelpthelittlemeanpeskythingsofdaybydaythatmakeroughnessorsmoothnessforfolkstiedtogethersoawfulclose。Mrs。Taylorhyeh——shedon’tknowanythingbetterthanTaylordoes。Shedon’twantanythinghecan’tgiveher。Herfriendswilldoforhimandhisforher。AndwhenIdreamedofyouinmyhome——“heclosedhiseyesanddrewalongbreath。Atlasthelookedatheragain。“Thisisnocountryforalady。Willyu’forgetandforgivethebotheringIhavedone?“

  “Oh!“criedMolly。“Oh!“Andsheputherhandstohereyes。Shehadrisenandstoodwithherfacecovered。

  “Isurelyhadtotellyouthisallout,didn’tI?“saidthecow-puncher,faintly,inhischair。“Oh!“saidMollyagain“Ihaveputitclearhowitis,“hepursued。“IoughttohaveseenfromthestartIwasnotthesorttokeepyouhappy。“

  “But,“saidMolly——“butI——youought——pleasetrytokeepmehappy!“Andsinkingbyhischair,shehidherfaceonhisknees。

  Speechless,liebentdownandfoldedherround,puttinghishandsonthehairthathadbeenalwayshisdelight。Presentlyhewhispered:-“Youhavebeatme;howcanIfightthis?“

  Sheanswerednothing。TheNavajo’sscarletandblackfoldsfelloverboth。Notwithwords,notevenwithmeetingeyes,didthetwoplighttheirtrothinthisfirstnewhour。Sotheyremainedlong,thefairheadnestinginthegreatarms,andtheblackheadlaidagainstit,whileoverthesilentroompresidedthelittleGrandmotherStarkinherframe,rosy,blue,andflaxen,notquitefamiliar,notquitesmiling。

  Foralongwhileaftershehadlefthim,helaystill,stretchedinhischair。Hiseyeswerefixedsteadilyupontheopenwindowandthesunshineoutside。Therehewatchedthemovementoftheleavesuponthegreencottonwoods。Whathadshesaidtohimwhenshewent?Shehadsaid,“NowIknowhowunhappyIhavebeen。“

  Thesesweetwordsherepeatedtohimselfoverandover,fearinginsomewaythathemightlosethem。Theyalmostslippedfromhimattimes;butwithajumpofhismindhecaughtthemagainandheldthem,——andthen-“I’mnotallstrongyet,“hemurmured。“I

  musthavebeenverysick。“And,weakfromhisbulletwoundandfever,heclosedhiseyeswithoutknowingit。Therewerethecottonwoodsagain,waving,waving;andhefeltthecool,pleasantairfromthewindow。Hesawthelightdraughtstirtheashesinthegreatstonefireplace。“Ihavebeenasleep,“hesaid。“Butshewascert’nlyhereherself。Oh,yes。Surely。Shealwayshastogoawayeverydaybecausethedoctorsays——why,shewasreadin’!“

  hebrokeoff,aloud。“DAVIDCOPPERFIELD。“Thereitwasonthefloor。“Aha!nailedyouanyway!“hesaid。“ButhowscaredIamofmyself!——You’reafool。Ofcourseit’sso。Nofeverbusinesscouldmakeyu’feellikethis。“

  Hiseyedweltawhileonthefireplace,nextonthedeerhorns,andnextittravelledtowardtheshelfwhereherbookswere;butitstoppedbeforereachingthem。

  “BettersayoffthenamesbeforeIlook,“saidhe。“I’vehadaheapo’misreadingvisions。And——andsupposin’——ifthiswasjustmysicknessfoolingmesomemore——I’dwanttodie。Iwoulddie!

  Nowwe’llsee。IfCOPPERFIELDisonthefloor“helookedstealthilytobesurethatitwas,“thenshewasreadin’tomewheneverythinghappened,andthenthereshouldbeaholeinthebookrow,top,left。Top,left,“herepeated,andwarilybroughthisglancetotheplace。“Proved!“hecried。“It’sallso!“

  HenownoticedtheminiatureofGrandmotherStark。“Youareawfullikeher,“hewhispered。“You’recert’nlyawfullikeher。MayI

  kissyoutoo,ma’am?“

  Then,tottering,herosefromhissick-chair。TheNavajoblanketfellfromhisshoulders,andgradually,experimentally,hestoodupright。

  Helpinghimselfwithhishandslowlyalongthewalloftheroom,androundtotheoppositewallwithmanyapause,hereachedthepicture,andverygentlytouchedtheforeheadoftheancestraldamewithhislips。“Ipromisetomakeyourlittlegirlhappy,hewhispered。

  Healmostfellinstoopingtotheportrait,butcaughthimselfandstoodcarefullyquiet,trembling,andspeakingtohimself。

  “Whereisyourstrength?“hedemanded。“Ireckonitisjoythathasunsteadiedyourlaigs。“

  Thedooropened。Itwasshe,comebackwithhisdinner。

  “MyHeavens!“shesaid;andsettingthetraydown,sherushedtohim。Shehelpedhimbacktohischair,andcoveredhimagain。Hehadsufferednohurt,butsheclungtohim;andpresentlyhemovedandlethimselfkissherwithfullerpassion。

  “Iwillbegood,“hewhispered。

  “Youmust,“shesaid。“Youlookedsopale!“

  “Youarespeakin’lowlikeme,“heanswered。“Butwehavenodreamwecanwakefrom。“

  Hadshesurrenderedonthisdaytohercowpuncher,herwildman?

  Wassheforeverwhollyhis?HadtheVirginian’sfiresomeltedherheartthatnoriftinitremained?Soshewouldhavethoughtifanythoughthadcometoher。Butinhisarmsto-day,thoughtwaslostinsomethingmoredivine。

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