ItmightbeexpectedthatIshouldgivesomeaccountofthe
natureofthewickedpracticesofthiswoman，inwhosehands
Iwasnowfallen；butitwouldbetoomuchencouragementto
thevice，tolettheworldseewhateasymeasureswerehere
takentoridthewomen’sunwelcomeburthenofachild
clandestinelygotten。
Thisgravematronhadseveralsortsof
practice，andthiswasoneparticular，thatifachildwasborn，
thoughnotinherhouseforshehadoccasiontobecalledto
manyprivatelabours，shehadpeopleathand，whoforapiece
ofmoneywouldtakethechildofftheirhands，andofffrom
thehandsoftheparishtoo；andthosechildren，asshesaid，
werehonestlyprovidedforandtakencareof。
Whatshould
becomeofthemall，consideringsomany，asbyheraccount
shewasconcernedwith，Icannotconceive。
Ihadmanytimesdiscoursesuponthatsubjectwithher；but
shewasfullofthisargument，thatshesavethelifeofmanyan
innocentlamb，asshecalledthem，whichwouldotherwise
perhapshavebeenmurdered；andofmanywomenwho，made
desperatebythemisfortune，wouldotherwisebetemptedto
destroytheirchildren，andbringthemselvestothegallows。
grantedherthatthiswastrue，andaverycommendablething，
providedthepoorchildrenfellintogoodhandsafterwards，
andwerenotabused，starved，andneglectedbythenurses
thatbredthemup。
Sheanswered，thatshealwaystookcare
ofthat，andhadnonursesinherbusinessbutwhatwerevery
good，honestpeople，andsuchasmightbedependedupon。
Icouldsaynothingtothecontrary，andsowasobligedtosay，
’Madam，Idonotquestionyoudoyourparthonestly，butwhat
thosepeopledoafterwardsisthemainquestion’；andshe
stoppedmymouthagainwithsayingthatshetooktheutmost
careaboutit。
TheonlythingIfoundinallherconversationonthesesubjects
thatgavemeanydistaste，was，thatonetimeindiscouraging
aboutmybeingfargonewithchild，andthetimeIexpected
tocome，shesaidsomethingthatlookedasifshecouldhelp
meoffwithmyburthensooner，ifIwaswilling；or，inEnglish，
thatshecouldgivemesomethingtomakememiscarry，ifI
hadadesiretoputanendtomytroublesthatway；butIsoon
letherseethatIabhorredthethoughtsofit；and，todoher
justice，sheputitoffsocleverly，thatIcouldnotsayshereally
intendedit，orwhethersheonlymentionedthepracticeasa
horriblething；forshecouchedherwordssowell，andtookmy
meaningsoquickly，thatshegavehernegativebeforeIcould
explainmyself。
Tobringthispartintoasnarrowacompassaspossible，Iquitted
mylodgingatSt。Jones’sandwenttomynewgoverness，for
sotheycalledherinthehouse，andthereIwasindeedtreated
withsomuchcourtesy，socarefullylookedto，sohandsomely
provided，andeverythingsowell，thatIwassurprisedatit，and
couldnotatfirstseewhatadvantagemygovernessmadeofit；
butIfoundafterwardsthatsheprofessedtomakenoprofitof
lodgers’diet，norindeedcouldshegetmuchbyit，butthat
herprofitlayintheotherarticlesofhermanagement，andshe
madeenoughthatway，Iassureyou；for’tisscarcecredible
whatpracticeshehad，aswellabroadasathome，andyetall
upontheprivateaccount，or，inplainEnglish，thewhoring
account。
WhileIwasinherhouse，whichwasnearfourmonths，she
hadnolessthantwelveladiesofpleasurebroughttobedwithin
thedoors，andIthinkshehadtwo-and-thirty，orthereabouts，
underherconductwithoutdoors，whereofone，asniceasshe
waswithme，waslodgedwithmyoldlandladyatSt。Jones’s。
Thiswasastrangetestimonyofthegrowingviceoftheage，
andsuchaone，thatasbadasIhadbeenmyself，itshocked
myverysenses。
IbegantonauseatetheplaceIwasinand，
aboutall，thewickedpractice；andyetImustsaythatInever
saw，ordoIbelievetherewastobeseen，theleastindecency
inthehousethewholetimeIwasthere。
Notamanwaseverseentocomeupstairs，excepttovisitthe
lying-inladieswithintheirmonth，northenwithouttheoldlady
withthem，whomadeitapieceofhonourofhermanagement
thatnomanshouldtouchawoman，no，nothisownwife，within
themonth；norwouldshepermitanymantolieinthehouse
uponanypretencewhatever，no，notthoughshewassureit
waswithhisownwife；andhergeneralsayingforitwas，that
shecarednothowmanychildrenwereborninherhouse，but
shewouldhavenonegotthereifshecouldhelpit。
Itmightperhapsbecarriedfurtherthanwasneedful，butitwas
anerroroftherighthandifitwasanerror，forbythisshekept
upthereputation，suchasitwas，ofherbusiness，andobtained
thischaracter，thatthoughshedidtakecareofthewomenwhen
theyweredebauched，yetshewasnotinstrumentaltotheirbeing
debauchedatall；andyetitwasawickedtradeshedrovetoo。
WhileIwasthere，andbeforeIwasbroughttobed，Ireceived
aletterfrommytrusteeatthebank，fullofkind，obligingthings，
andearnestlypressingmetoreturntoLondon。
Itwasneara
fortnightoldwhenitcametome，becauseithadbeenfirstsent
intoLancashire，andthenreturnedtome。
Heconcludeswith
tellingmethathehadobtainedadecree，Ithinkhecalledit，
againsthiswife，andthathewouldbereadytomakegoodhis
engagementtome，ifIwouldacceptofhim，addingagreat
manyprotestationsofkindnessandaffection，suchashewould
havebeenfarfromofferingifhehadknownthecircumstances
Ihadbeenin，andwhichasitwasIhadbeenveryfarfrom
deserving。
Ireturnedananswertohisletter，anddateditatLiverpool，
butsentitbymessenger，allegingthatitcameincovertoa
friendintown。
Igavehimjoyofhisdeliverance，butraised
somescruplesatthelawfulnessofhismarryingagain，andtold
himIsupposedhewouldconsiderveryseriouslyuponthat
pointbeforeheresolvedonit，theconsequencebeingtoogreat
foramanofhisjudgmenttoventurerashlyuponathingofthat
nature；soconcluded，wishinghimverywellinwhateverhe
resolved，withoutlettinghimintoanythingofmyownmind，
orgivinganyanswertohisproposalofmycomingtoLondon
tohim，butmentionedatadistancemyintentiontoreturnthe
latterendoftheyear，thisbeingdatedinApril。
IwasbroughttobedaboutthemiddleofMayandhadanother
braveboy，andmyselfinasgoodconditionasusualonsuch
occasions。
Mygovernessdidherpartasamidwifewiththe
greatestartanddexterityimaginable，andfarbeyondallthat
everIhadhadanyexperienceofbefore。
Hercareofmeinmytravail，andafterinmylyingin，was
such，thatifshehadbeenmyownmotheritcouldnothave
beenbetter。
Letnonebeencouragedintheirloosepractices
fromthisdexterouslady’smanagement，forsheisgonetoher
place，andIdaresayhasleftnothingbehindherthatcanor
willcomeuponit。
IthinkIhadbeenbroughttobedabouttwenty-twodayswhen
Ireceivedanotherletterfrommyfriendatthebank，withthe
surprisingnewsthathehadobtainedafinalsentenceofdivorce
againsthiswife，andhadservedherwithitonsuchaday，and
thathehadsuchananswertogivetoallmyscruplesabouthis
marryingagain，asIcouldnotexpect，andashehadnodesire
of；forthathiswife，whohadbeenundersomeremorsebefore
forherusageofhim，assoonasshehadtheaccountthathe
hadgainedhispoint，hadveryunhappilydestroyedherselfthat
sameevening。
Heexpressedhimselfveryhandsomelyastohisbeingconcerned
atherdisaster，butclearedhimselfofhavinganyhandinit，
andthathehadonlydonehimselfjusticeinacaseinwhichhe
wasnotoriouslyinjuredandabused。
However，hesaidthat
hewasextremelyafflictedatit，andhadnoviewofany
satisfactionleftinhisworld，butonlyinthehopethatIwould
comeandrelievehimbymycompany；andthenhepressedme
violentlyindeedtogivehimsomehopesthatIwouldatleast
comeuptotownandlethimseeme，whenhewouldfurther
enterintodiscourseaboutit。
Iwasexceedinglysurprisedatthenews，andbegannow
seriouslytoreflectonmypresentcircumstances，andthe
inexpressiblemisfortuneitwastometohaveachilduponmy
hands，andwhattodoinitIknewnot。
AtlastIopenedmy
caseatadistancetomygoverness。
Iappearedmelancholy
anduneasyforseveraldays，andshelayatmecontinuallyto
knowwhattroubleme。
IcouldnotformylifetellherthatI
hadanofferofmarriage，afterIhadsooftentoldherthatI
hadahusband，sothatIreallyknewnotwhattosaytoher。
ownedIhadsomethingwhichverymuchtroubledme，butat
thesametimetoldherIcouldnotspeakofittoanyonealive。
Shecontinuedimportuningmeseveraldays，butitwas
impossible，Itoldher，formetocommitthesecrettoanybody。
This，insteadofbeingananswertoher，increasedher
importunities；sheurgedherhavingbeentrustedwiththe
greatestsecretsofthisnature，thatitwasherbusinessto
concealeverything，andthattodiscoverthingsofthatnature
wouldbeherruin。
SheaskedmeifeverIhadfoundhertattling
tomeofotherpeople’saffairs，andhowcouldIsuspecther？
Shetoldme，tounfoldmyselftoherwastellingittonobody；
thatshewassilentasdeath；thatitmustbeaverystrangecase
indeedthatshecouldnothelpmeoutof；buttoconcealitwas
todeprivemyselfofallpossiblehelp，ormeansofhelp，andto
depriveheroftheopportunityofservingme。
Inshort，shehad
suchabewitchingeloquence，andsogreatapowerofpersuasion
thattherewasnoconcealinganythingfromher。
SoIresolvedtounbosommyselftoher。
Itoldherthehistory
ofmyLancashiremarriage，andhowbothofushadbeen
disappointed；howwecametogether，andhowweparted；how
heabsolutelydischargedme，asfaraslayinhim，freelibertyto
marryagain，protestingthatifheknewithewouldneverclaim
me，ordisturborexposeme；thatIthoughtIwasfree，butwas
dreadfullyafraidtoventure，forfearoftheconsequencesthat
mightfollowincaseofadiscovery。
ThenItoldherwhatagoodofferIhad；showedhermyfriend’s
twolastletters，invitingmetocometoLondon，andlethersee
withwhataffectionandearnestnesstheywerewritten，but
blottedoutthename，andalsothestoryaboutthedisasterof
hiswife，onlythatshewasdead。
Shefella-laughingatmyscruplesaboutmarrying，andtold
metheotherwasnomarriage，butacheatonbothsides；and
that，aswewerepartedbymutualconsent，thenatureofthe
contractwasdestroyed，andtheobligationwasmutually
discharged。
Shehadargumentsforthisatthetipofhertongue；
and，inshort，reasonedmeoutofmyreason；notbutthatit
wastoobythehelpofmyowninclination。
Butthencamethegreatandmaindifficulty，andthatwasthe
child；this，shetoldmeinsomanywords，mustberemoved，
andthatsoasthatitshouldneverbepossibleforanyoneto
discoverit。