Itfellfromagreatheight,butitlookedquitelow,anditwashalfamileaway,thoughitdidnotseemfiftypaces。Ilovedtolistentoitatnight,butitwasthenthatIbecamesorestless。
SometimesIwentandclimbedthemountainandstoodthereinthemidstofthetallpines,allaloneintheterriblesilence,withourlittlevillageinthedistance,andtheskysoblue,andthesunsobright,andanoldruinedcastleonthemountain-side,faraway。Iusedtowatchthelinewhereearthandskymet,andlongedtogoandseektherethekeyofallmysteries,thinkingthatImightfindthereanewlife,perhapssomegreatcitywherelifeshouldbegranderandricher——andthenitstruckmethatlifemaybegrandenougheveninaprison。\"
\"Ireadthatlastmostpraiseworthythoughtinmymanual,whenI
wastwelveyearsold,\"saidAglaya。
\"Allthisispurephilosophy,\"saidAdelaida。\"Youareaphilosopher,prince,andhavecomeheretoinstructusinyourviews。\"
\"Perhapsyouareright,\"saidtheprince,smiling。\"IthinkIamaphilosopher,perhaps,andwhoknows,perhapsIdowishtoteachmyviewsofthingstothoseImeetwith?\"
\"Yourphilosophyisratherlikethatofanoldwomanweknow,whoisrichandyetdoesnothingbuttryhowlittleshecanspend。
Shetalksofnothingbutmoneyallday。YourgreatphilosophicalideaofagrandlifeinaprisonandyourfourhappyyearsinthatSwissvillagearelikethis,rather,\"saidAglaya。
\"Astolifeinaprison,ofcoursetheremaybetwoopinions,\"
saidtheprince。\"Ionceheardthestoryofamanwholivedtwelveyearsinaprison——Ihearditfromthemanhimself。Hewasoneofthepersonsundertreatmentwithmyprofessor;hehadfits,andattacksofmelancholy,thenhewouldweep,andoncehetriedtocommitsuicide。HISlifeinprisonwassadenough;hisonlyacquaintanceswerespidersandatreethatgrewoutsidehisgrating-butIthinkIhadbettertellyouofanothermanImetlastyear。Therewasaverystrangefeatureinthiscase,strangebecauseofitsextremelyrareoccurrence。Thismanhadoncebeenbroughttothescaffoldincompanywithseveralothers,andhadhadthesentenceofdeathbyshootingpasseduponhimforsomepoliticalcrime。Twentyminuteslaterhehadbeenreprievedandsomeotherpunishmentsubstituted;buttheintervalbetweenthetwosentences,twentyminutes,oratleastaquarterofanhour,hadbeenpassedinthecertaintythatwithinafewminuteshemustdie。Iwasveryanxioustohearhimspeakofhisimpressionsduringthatdreadfultime,andIseveraltimesinquiredofhimastowhathethoughtandfelt。Herememberedeverythingwiththemostaccurateandextraordinarydistinctness,anddeclaredthathewouldneverforgetasingleiotaoftheexperience。
\"Abouttwentypacesfromthescaffold,wherehehadstoodtohearthesentence,werethreeposts,fixedintheground,towhichtofastenthecriminalsofwhomtherewereseveral。Thefirstthreecriminalsweretakentotheposts,dressedinlongwhitetunics,withwhitecapsdrawnovertheirfaces,sothattheycouldnotseetheriflespointedatthem。Thenagroupofsoldierstooktheirstandoppositetoeachpost。Myfriendwastheeighthonthelist,andthereforehewouldhavebeenamongthethirdlottogoup。Apriestwentaboutamongthemwithacross:andtherewasaboutfiveminutesoftimeleftforhimtolive。
\"Hesaidthatthosefiveminutesseemedtohimtobeamostinterminableperiod,anenormouswealthoftime;heseemedtobeliving,intheseminutes,somanylivesthattherewasnoneedasyettothinkofthatlastmoment,sothathemadeseveralarrangements,dividingupthetimeintoportions——oneforsayingfarewelltohiscompanions,twominutesforthat;thenacouplemoreforthinkingoverhisownlifeandcareerandallabouthimself;andanotherminuteforalastlookaround。Herememberedhavingdividedhistimelikethisquitewell。Whilesayinggood-
byetohisfriendsherecollectedaskingoneofthemsomeveryusualeverydayquestion,andbeingmuchinterestedintheanswer。
Thenhavingbadefarewell,heembarkeduponthosetwominuteswhichhehadallottedtolookingintohimself;heknewbeforehandwhathewasgoingtothinkabout。Hewishedtoputittohimselfasquicklyandclearlyaspossible,thatherewashe,aliving,thinkingman,andthatinthreeminuteshewouldbenobody;orifsomebodyorsomething,thenwhatandwhere?Hethoughthewoulddecidethisquestiononceforallintheselastthreeminutes。Alittlewayofftherestoodachurch,anditsgildedspireglitteredinthesun。Herememberedstaringstubbornlyatthisspire,andattheraysoflightsparklingfromit。Hecouldnottearhiseyesfromtheseraysoflight;hegottheideathattheserayswerehisnewnature,andthatinthreeminuteshewouldbecomeoneofthem,amalgamatedsomehowwiththem。
\"Therepugnancetowhatmustensuealmostimmediately,andtheuncertainty,weredreadful,hesaid;butworstofallwastheidea,’WhatshouldIdoifIwerenottodienow?WhatifIweretoreturntolifeagain?Whataneternityofdays,andallmine!
HowIshouldgrudgeandcountupeveryminuteofit,soastowastenotasingleinstant!’Hesaidthatthisthoughtweighedsouponhimandbecamesuchaterribleburdenuponhisbrainthathecouldnotbearit,andwishedtheywouldshoothimquicklyandhavedonewithit。\"
Theprincepausedandallwaited,expectinghimtogoonagainandfinishthestory。
\"Isthatall?\"askedAglaya。
\"All?Yes,\"saidtheprince,emergingfromamomentaryreverie。
\"Andwhydidyoutellusthis?\"
\"Oh,Ihappenedtorecallit,that’sall!Itfittedintotheconversation——\"
\"Youprobablywishtodeduce,prince,\"saidAlexandra,\"thatmomentsoftimecannotbereckonedbymoneyvalue,andthatsometimesfiveminutesareworthpricelesstreasures。Allthisisverypraiseworthy;butmayIaskaboutthisfriendofyours,whotoldyoutheterribleexperienceofhislife?Hewasreprieved,yousay;inotherwords,theydidrestoretohimthat’eternityofdays。’Whatdidhedowiththeserichesoftime?Didhekeepcarefulaccountofhisminutes?\"
\"Ohno,hedidn’t!Iaskedhimmyself。Hesaidthathehadnotlivedabitashehadintended,andhadwastedmany,andmanyaminute。\"
\"Verywell,thenthere’sanexperiment,andthethingisproved;
onecannotliveandcounteachmoment;saywhatyoulike,butoneCANNOT。\"
\"Thatistrue,\"saidtheprince,\"Ihavethoughtsomyself。Andyet,whyshouldn’tonedoit?\"
\"Youthink,then,thatyoucouldlivemorewiselythanotherpeople?\"saidAglaya。
\"Ihavehadthatidea。\"
\"Andyouhaveitstill?\"
\"Yes——Ihaveitstill,\"theprincereplied。
HehadcontemplatedAglayauntilnow,withapleasantthoughrathertimidsmile,butasthelastwordsfellfromhislipshebegantolaugh,andlookedathermerrily。
\"Youarenotverymodest!\"saidshe。
\"Buthowbraveyouare!\"saidhe。\"Youarelaughing,andI——
thatman’staleimpressedmesomuch,thatIdreamtofitafterwards;yes,Idreamtofthosefiveminutes……\"
Helookedathislistenersagainwiththatsameserious,searchingexpression。
\"Youarenotangrywithme?\"heaskedsuddenly,andwithakindofnervoushurry,althoughhelookedthemstraightintheface。
\"Whyshouldwebeangry?\"theycried。
\"OnlybecauseIseemtobegivingyoualecture,allthetime!\"
Atthistheylaughedheartily。
\"Pleasedon’tbeangrywithme,\"continuedtheprince。\"IknowverywellthatIhaveseenlessoflifethanotherpeople,andhavelessknowledgeofit。Imustappeartospeakstrangelysometimes……\"
Hesaidthelastwordsnervously。
\"Yousayyouhavebeenhappy,andthatprovesyouhavelived,notless,butmorethanotherpeople。Whymakealltheseexcuses?\"
interruptedAglayainamockingtoneofvoice。\"Besides,youneednotmindaboutlecturingus;youhavenothingtoboastof。Withyourquietism,onecouldlivehappilyforahundredyearsatleast。Onemightshowyoutheexecutionofafelon,orshowyouone’slittlefinger。Youcoulddrawamoralfromeither,andbequitesatisfied。Thatsortofexistenceiseasyenough。\"
\"Ican’tunderstandwhyyoualwaysflyintoatemper,\"saidMrs。
Epanchin,whohadbeenlisteningtotheconversationandexaminingthefacesofthespeakersinturn。\"Idonotunderstandwhatyoumean。Whathasyourlittlefingertodowithit?Theprincetalkswell,thoughheisnotamusing。Hebeganallright,butnowheseemssad。\"
\"Nevermind,mamma!Prince,Iwishyouhadseenanexecution,\"
saidAglaya。\"Ishouldliketoaskyouaquestionaboutthat,ifyouhad。\"
\"Ihaveseenanexecution,\"saidtheprince。
\"Youhave!\"criedAglaya。\"Imighthaveguessedit。That’safittingcrowntotherestofthestory。Ifyouhaveseenanexecution,howcanyousayyoulivedhappilyallthewhile?\"
\"Butistherecapitalpunishmentwhereyouwere?\"askedAdelaida。
\"IsawitatLyons。Schneidertookusthere,andassoonaswearrivedwecameinforthat。\"
\"Well,anddidyoulikeitverymuch?Wasitveryedifyingandinstructive?\"askedAglaya。
\"No,Ididn’tlikeitatall,andwasillafterseeingit;butI
confessIstaredasthoughmyeyeswerefixedtothesight。I
couldnottearthemaway。\"
\"I,too,shouldhavebeenunabletotearmyeyesaway,\"saidAglaya。
\"Theydonotatallapproveofwomengoingtoseeanexecutionthere。Thewomenwhodogoarecondemnedforitafterwardsinthenewspapers。\"
\"Thatis,bycontendingthatitisnotasightforwomentheyadmitthatitisasightformen。Icongratulatethemonthededuction。Isupposeyouquiteagreewiththem,prince?\"
\"Tellusabouttheexecution,\"putinAdelaida。
\"Iwouldmuchrathernot,justnow,\"saidtheprince,alittledisturbedandfrowningslightly;
\"Youdon’tseemtowanttotellus,\"saidAglaya,withamockingair。
\"No,——thethingis,Iwastellingallabouttheexecutionalittlewhileago,and——\"
\"Whomdidyoutellaboutit?\"
\"Theman-servant,whileIwaswaitingtoseethegeneral。\"
\"Ourman-servant?\"exclaimedseveralvoicesatonce。
\"Yes,theonewhowaitsintheentrancehall,agreyish,red-
facedman——\"
\"Theprinceisclearlyademocrat,\"remarkedAglaya。
\"Well,ifyoucouldtellAlekseyaboutit,surelyyoucantellustoo。\"
\"Idosowanttohearaboutit,\"repeatedAdelaida。
\"Justnow,Iconfess,\"begantheprince,withmoreanimation,\"whenyouaskedmeforasubjectforapicture,IconfessIhadseriousthoughtsofgivingyouone。Ithoughtofaskingyoutodrawthefaceofacriminal,oneminutebeforethefalloftheguillotine,whilethewretchedmanisstillstandingonthescaffold,preparatorytoplacinghisneckontheblock。\"
\"What,hisface?onlyhisface?\"askedAdelaida。\"Thatwouldbeastrangesubjectindeed。Andwhatsortofapicturewouldthatmake?\"
\"Oh,whynot?\"theprinceinsisted,withsomewarmth。\"WhenIwasinBasleIsawapictureverymuchinthatstyle——Ishouldliketotellyouaboutit;Iwillsometimeorother;itstruckmeveryforcibly。\"
\"Oh,youshalltellusabouttheBaslepictureanothertime;nowwemusthaveallabouttheexecution,\"saidAdelaida。\"Tellusaboutthatfaceas;itappearedtoyourimagination-howshoulditbedrawn?——justthefacealone,doyoumean?\"
\"Itwasjustaminutebeforetheexecution,\"begantheprince,readily,carriedawaybytherecollectionandevidentlyforgettingeverythingelseinamoment;\"justattheinstantwhenhesteppedofftheladderontothescaffold。Hehappenedtolookinmydirection:Isawhiseyesandunderstoodall,atonce——buthowamItodescribeit?Idosowishyouorsomebodyelsecoulddrawit,you,ifpossible。Ithoughtatthetimewhatapictureitwouldmake。Youmustimagineallthatwentbefore,ofcourse,all——all。Hehadlivedintheprisonforsometimeandhadnotexpectedthattheexecutionwouldtakeplaceforatleastaweekyet——hehadcountedonalltheformalitiesandsoontakingtime;butitsohappenedthathispapershadbeengotreadyquickly。Atfiveo’clockinthemorninghewasasleep——itwasOctober,andatfiveinthemorningitwascoldanddark。Thegovernoroftheprisoncomesinontip-toeandtouchesthesleepingman’sshouldergently。Hestartsup。’Whatisit?’hesays。’Theexecutionisfixedforteno’clock。’Hewasonlyjustawake,andwouldnotbelieveatfirst,butbegantoarguethathispaperswouldnotbeoutforaweek,andsoon。Whenhewaswideawakeandrealizedthetruth,hebecameverysilentandarguednomore——sotheysay;butafterabithesaid:’Itcomesveryhardononesosuddenly’andthenhewassilentagainandsaidnothing。
\"Thethreeorfourhourswentby,ofcourse,innecessarypreparations——thepriest,breakfast,coffee,meat,andsomewinetheygavehim;doesn’titseemridiculous?AndyetI
believethesepeoplegivethemagoodbreakfastoutofpurekindnessofheart,andbelievethattheyaredoingagoodaction。
Thenheisdressed,andthenbeginstheprocessionthroughthetowntothescaffold。Ithinkhe,too,mustfeelthathehasanagetolivestillwhiletheycarthimalong。Probablyhethought,ontheway,’Oh,Ihavealong,longtimeyet。Threestreetsoflifeyet!Whenwe’vepassedthisstreetthere’llbethatotherone;andthenthatonewherethebaker’sshopisontheright;
andwhenshallwegetthere?It’sages,ages!’Aroundhimarecrowdsshouting,yelling——tenthousandfaces,twentythousandeyes。Allthishastobeendured,andespeciallythethought:
’Herearetenthousandmen,andnotoneofthemisgoingtobeexecuted,andyetIamtodie。’Well,allthatispreparatory。
\"Atthescaffoldthereisaladder,andjustthereheburstintotears——andthiswasastrongman,andaterriblywickedone,theysay!Therewasapriestwithhimthewholetime,talking;eveninthecartastheydrovealong,hetalkedandtalked。Probablytheotherheardnothing;hewouldbegintolistennowandthen,andatthethirdwordorsohehadforgottenallaboutit。
\"Atlasthebegantomountthesteps;hislegsweretied,sothathehadtotakeverysmallsteps。Thepriest,whoseemedtobeawiseman,hadstoppedtalkingnow,andonlyheldthecrossforthewretchedfellowtokiss。Atthefootoftheladderhehadbeenpaleenough;butwhenhesetfootonthescaffoldatthetop,hisfacesuddenlybecamethecolourofpaper,positivelylikewhitenotepaper。Hislegsmusthavebecomesuddenlyfeebleandhelpless,andhefeltachokinginhisthroat——youknowthesuddenfeelingonehasinmomentsofterriblefear,whenonedoesnotloseone’swits,butisabsolutelypowerlesstomove?Ifsomedreadfulthingweresuddenlytohappen;ifahousewerejustabouttofallonone;——don’tyouknowhowonewouldlongtositdownandshutone’seyesandwait,andwait?Well,whenthisterriblefeelingcameoverhim,thepriestquicklypressedthecrosstohislips,withoutaword——alittlesilvercrossitwas-
andhekeptonpressingittotheman’slipseverysecond。Andwheneverthecrosstouchedhislips,theeyeswouldopenforamoment,andthelegsmovedonce,andhekissedthecrossgreedily,hurriedly——justasthoughhewereanxioustocatchholdofsomethingincaseofitsbeingusefultohimafterwards,thoughhecouldhardlyhavehadanyconnectedreligiousthoughtsatthetime。Andsouptotheveryblock。
\"Howstrangethatcriminalsseldomswoonatsuchamoment!Onthecontrary,thebrainisespeciallyactive,andworksincessantly——
probablyhard,hard,hard——likeanengineatfullpressure。I
imaginethatvariousthoughtsmustbeatloudandfastthroughhishead——allunfinishedones,andstrange,funnythoughts,verylikely!——likethis,forinstance:’Thatmanislookingatme,andhehasawartonhisforehead!andtheexecutionerhasburstoneofhisbuttons,andthelowestoneisallrusty!’Andmeanwhilehenoticesandrememberseverything。Thereisonepointthatcannotbeforgotten,roundwhicheverythingelsedancesandturnsabout;andbecauseofthispointhecannotfaint,andthislastsuntiltheveryfinalquarterofasecond,whenthewretchedneckisontheblockandthevictimlistensandwaitsandKNOWS——
that’sthepoint,heKNOWSthatheisjustNOWabouttodie,andlistensfortheraspoftheironoverhishead。IfIlaythere,I
shouldcertainlylistenforthatgratingsound,andhearit,too!
Therewouldprobablybebutthetenthpartofaninstantlefttohearitin,butonewouldcertainlyhearit。Andimagine,somepeopledeclarethatwhentheheadfliesoffitisCONSCIOUSofhavingflownoff!Justimaginewhatathingtorealize!Fancyifconsciousnessweretolastforevenfiveseconds!
\"Drawthescaffoldsothatonlythetopstepoftheladdercomesinclearly。Thecriminalmustbejuststeppingontoit,hisfaceaswhiteasnote-paper。Thepriestisholdingthecrosstohisbluelips,andthecriminalkissesit,andknowsandseesandunderstandseverything。Thecrossandthehead——there’syourpicture;thepriestandtheexecutioner,withhistwoassistants,andafewheadsandeyesbelow。Thosemightcomeinassubordinateaccessories——asortofmist。There’sapictureforyou。\"Theprincepaused,andlookedaround。
\"Certainlythatisn’tmuchlikequietism,\"murmuredAlexandra,halftoherself。
\"Nowtellusaboutyourloveaffairs,\"saidAdelaida,afteramoment’spause。
Theprincegazedatherinamazement。
\"Youknow,\"Adelaidacontinued,\"youoweusadescriptionoftheBaslepicture;butfirstIwishtohearhowyoufellinlove。
Don’tdenythefact,foryoudid,ofcourse。Besides,youstopphilosophizingwhenyouaretellingaboutanything。\"
\"Whyareyouashamedofyourstoriesthemomentafteryouhavetoldthem?\"askedAglaya,suddenly。
\"Howsillyyouare!\"saidMrs。Epanchin,lookingindignantlytowardsthelastspeaker。
\"Yes,thatwasn’tacleverremark,\"saidAlexandra。
\"Don’tlistentoher,prince,\"saidMrs。Epanchin;\"shesaysthatsortofthingoutofmischief。Don’tthinkanythingoftheirnonsense,itmeansnothing。Theylovetochaff,buttheylikeyou。Icanseeitintheirfaces——Iknowtheirfaces。\"
\"Iknowtheirfaces,too,\"saidtheprince,withapeculiarstressonthewords。
\"Howso?\"askedAdelaida,withcuriosity。
\"WhatdoYOUknowaboutourfaces?\"exclaimedtheothertwo,inchorus。
Buttheprincewassilentandserious。Allawaitedhisreply。
\"I’lltellyouafterwards,\"hesaidquietly。
\"Ah,youwanttoarouseourcuriosity!\"saidAglaya。\"Andhowterriblysolemnyouareaboutit!\"
\"Verywell,\"interruptedAdelaida,\"thenifyoucanreadfacessowell,youmusthavebeeninlove。Comenow;I’veguessed——let’shavethesecret!\"
\"Ihavenotbeeninlove,\"saidtheprince,asquietlyandseriouslyasbefore。\"Ihavebeenhappyinanotherway。\"
\"How,how?\"
\"Well,I’lltellyou,\"saidtheprince,apparentlyinadeepreverie。
VI。
\"Hereyouallare,\"begantheprince,\"settlingyourselvesdowntolistentomewithsomuchcuriosity,thatifIdonotsatisfyyouyouwillprobablybeangrywithme。No,no!I’monlyjoking!\"headded,hastily,withasmile。
\"Well,then——theywereallchildrenthere,andIwasalwaysamongchildrenandonlywithchildren。TheywerethechildrenofthevillageinwhichIlived,andtheywenttotheschoolthere——allofthem。Ididnotteachthem,ohno;therewasamasterforthat,oneJulesThibaut。Imayhavetaughtthemsomethings,butIwasamongthemjustasanoutsider,andIpassedallfouryearsofmylifethereamongthem。Iwishedfornothingbetter;Iusedtotellthemeverythingandhidnothingfromthem。Theirfathersandrelationswereveryangrywithme,becausethechildrencoulddonothingwithoutmeatlast,andusedtothrongaftermeatalltimes。Theschoolmasterwasmygreatestenemyintheend!Ihadmanyenemies,andallbecauseofthechildren。EvenSchneiderreproachedme。Whatweretheyafraidof?Onecantellachildeverything,anything。Ihaveoftenbeenstruckbythefactthatparentsknowtheirchildrensolittle。Theyshouldnotconcealsomuchfromthem。Howwellevenlittlechildrenunderstandthattheirparentsconcealthingsfromthem,becausetheyconsiderthemtooyoungtounderstand!Childrenarecapableofgivingadviceinthemostimportantmatters。Howcanonedeceivethesedearlittlebirds,whentheylookatonesosweetlyandconfidingly?Icallthembirdsbecausethereisnothingintheworldbetterthanbirds!
\"However,mostofthepeoplewereangrywithmeaboutoneandthesamething;butThibautsimplywasjealousofme。AtfirsthehadwaggedhisheadandwonderedhowitwasthatthechildrenunderstoodwhatItoldthemsowell,andcouldnotlearnfromhim;andhelaughedlikeanythingwhenIrepliedthatneitherhenorIcouldteachthemverymuch,butthatTHEYmightteachusagooddeal。
\"Howhecouldhatemeandtellscandalousstoriesaboutme,livingamongchildrenashedid,iswhatIcannotunderstand。
Childrensootheandhealthewoundedheart。Iremembertherewasonepoorfellowatourprofessor’swhowasbeingtreatedformadness,andyouhavenoideawhatthosechildrendidforhim,eventually。Idon’tthinkhewasmad,butonlyterriblyunhappy。ButI’lltellyouallabouthimanotherday。NowImustgetonwiththisstory。
\"Thechildrendidnotlovemeatfirst;Iwassuchasickly,awkwardkindofafellowthen——andIknowIamugly。Besides,I
wasaforeigner。Thechildrenusedtolaughatme,atfirst;andtheyevenwentsofarastothrowstonesatme,whentheysawmekissMarie。Ionlykissedheronceinmylife——no,no,don’tlaugh!\"Theprincehastenedtosuppressthesmilesofhisaudienceatthispoint。\"ItwasnotamatterofLOVEatall!Ifonlyyouknewwhatamiserablecreatureshewas,youwouldhavepitiedher,justasIdid。Shebelongedtoourvillage。Hermotherwasanold,oldwoman,andtheyusedtosellstringandthread,andsoapandtobacco,outofthewindowoftheirlittlehouse,andlivedonthepittancetheygainedbythistrade。Theoldwomanwasillandveryold,andcouldhardlymove。Mariewasherdaughter,agirloftwenty,weakandthinandconsumptive;
butstillshedidheavyworkatthehousesaround,daybyday。
Well,onefinedayacommercialtravellerbetrayedherandcarriedheroff;andaweeklaterhedesertedher。Shecamehomedirty,draggled,andshoeless;shehadwalkedforawholeweekwithoutshoes;shehadsleptinthefields,andcaughtaterriblecold;herfeetwereswollenandsore,andherhandstornandscratchedallover。Sheneverhadbeenprettyevenbefore;buthereyeswerequiet,innocent,kindeyes。
\"Shewasveryquietalways——andIrememberonce,whenshehadsuddenlybegunsingingatherwork,everyonesaid,’Marietriedtosingtoday!’andshegotsochaffedthatshewassilentforeverafter。Shehadbeentreatedkindlyintheplacebefore;butwhenshecamebacknow——illandshunnedandmiserable——notoneofthemallhadtheslightestsympathyforher。Cruelpeople!Oh,whathazyunderstandingstheyhaveonsuchmatters!Hermotherwasthefirsttoshowtheway。Shereceivedherwrathfully,unkindly,andwithcontempt。’Youhavedisgracedme,’shesaid。
Shewasthefirsttocastherintoignominy;butwhentheyallheardthatMariehadreturnedtothevillage,theyranouttoseeherandcrowdedintothelittlecottage——oldmen,children,women,girls——suchahurrying,stamping,greedycrowd。Mariewaslyingonthefloorattheoldwoman’sfeet,hungry,torn,draggled,crying,miserable。
\"Wheneveryonecrowdedintotheroomshehidherfaceinherdishevelledhairandlaycoweringonthefloor。Everyonelookedatherasthoughshewereapieceofdirtofftheroad。Theoldmenscoldedandcondemned,andtheyoungoneslaughedather。Thewomencondemnedhertoo,andlookedathercontemptuously,justasthoughsheweresomeloathsomeinsect。
\"Hermotherallowedallthistogoon,andnoddedherheadandencouragedthem。Theoldwomanwasveryillatthattime,andknewshewasdyingshereallydiddieacoupleofmonthslater,andthoughshefelttheendapproachingsheneverthoughtofforgivingherdaughter,totheverydayofherdeath。Shewouldnotevenspeaktoher。Shemadehersleeponstrawinashed,andhardlygaveherfoodenoughtosupportlife。
\"Mariewasverygentletohermother,andnursedher,anddideverythingforher;buttheoldwomanacceptedallherserviceswithoutawordandnevershowedhertheslightestkindness。Marieboreallthis;andIcouldseewhenIgottoknowherthatshethoughtitquiterightandfitting,consideringherselfthelowestandmeanestofcreatures。
\"Whentheoldwomantooktoherbedfinally,theotheroldwomeninthevillagesatwithherbyturns,asthecustomisthere;andthenMariewasquitedrivenoutofthehouse。Theygavehernofoodatall,andshecouldnotgetanyworkinthevillage;nonewouldemployher。Themenseemedtoconsiderhernolongerawoman,theysaidsuchdreadfulthingstoher。SometimesonSundays,iftheyweredrunkenough,theyusedtothrowherapennyortwo,intothemud,andMariewouldsilentlypickupthemoney。Shehadbegantospitbloodatthattime。
\"Atlastherragsbecamesotatteredandtornthatshewasashamedofappearinginthevillageanylonger。Thechildrenusedtopeltherwithmud;soshebeggedtobetakenonasassistantcowherd,butthecowherdwouldnothaveher。Thenshetooktohelpinghimwithoutleave;andhesawhowvaluableherassistancewastohim,anddidnotdriveherawayagain;onthecontrary,heoccasionallygavehertheremnantsofhisdinner,breadandcheese。Heconsideredthathewasbeingverykind。Whenthemotherdied,thevillageparsonwasnotashamedtoholdMarieuptopublicderisionandshame。Mariewasstandingatthecoffin’shead,inallherrags,crying。
\"Acrowdofpeoplehadcollectedtoseehowshewouldcry。Theparson,ayoungfellowambitiousofbecomingagreatpreacher,beganhissermonandpointedtoMarie。’There,’hesaid,’thereisthecauseofthedeathofthisvenerablewoman’——whichwasalie,becauseshehadbeenillforatleasttwoyears——’thereshestandsbeforeyou,anddaresnotlifthereyesfromtheground,becausesheknowsthatthefingerofGodisuponher。Lookathertattersandrags——thebadgeofthosewholosetheirvirtue。Whoisshe?herdaughter!’andsoontotheend。
\"Andjustfancy,thisinfamypleasedthem,allofthem,nearly。
Onlythechildrenhadaltered——forthentheywereallonmysideandhadlearnedtoloveMarie。
\"Thisishowitwas:IhadwishedtodosomethingforMarie;I
longedtogivehersomemoney,butIneverhadafarthingwhileI
wasthere。ButIhadalittlediamondpin,andthisIsoldtoatravellingpedlar;hegavemeeightfrancsforit——itwasworthatleastforty。
\"IlongsoughttomeetMariealone;andatlastIdidmeether,onthehillsidebeyondthevillage。IgavehertheeightfrancsandaskedhertotakecareofthemoneybecauseIcouldgetnomore;andthenIkissedherandsaidthatshewasnottosupposeIkissedherwithanyevilmotivesorbecauseIwasinlovewithher,forthatIdidsosolelyoutofpityforher,andbecausefromthefirstIhadnotaccountedherasguiltysomuchasunfortunate。Ilongedtoconsoleandencouragehersomehow,andtoassureherthatshewasnotthelow,basethingwhichsheandothersstrovetomakeout;butIdon’tthinksheunderstoodme。
Shestoodbeforeme,dreadfullyashamedofherself,andwithdowncasteyes;andwhenIhadfinishedshekissedmyhand。I
wouldhavekissedhers,butshedrewitaway。Justatthismomentthewholetroopofchildrensawus。Ifoundoutafterwardsthattheyhadlongkeptawatchuponme。Theyallbeganwhistlingandclappingtheirhands,andlaughingatus。Marieranawayatonce;
andwhenItriedtotalktothem,theythrewstonesatme。Allthevillageheardofitthesameday,andMarie’spositionbecameworsethanever。Thechildrenwouldnotletherpassnowinthestreets,butannoyedherandthrewdirtathermorethanbefore。
Theyusedtorunafterher——sheracingawaywithherpoorfeeblelungspantingandgasping,andtheypeltingherandshoutingabuseather。
\"OnceIhadtointerferebyforce;andafterthatItooktospeakingtothemeverydayandwheneverIcould。Occasionallytheystoppedandlistened;buttheyteasedMarieallthesame。
\"ItoldthemhowunhappyMariewas,andafterawhiletheystoppedtheirabuseofher,andlethergobysilently。Littlebylittlewegotintothewayofconversingtogether,thechildrenandI。Iconcealednothingfromthem,Itoldthemall。TheylistenedveryattentivelyandsoonbegantobesorryforMarie。
Atlastsomeofthemtooktosaying’Good-morning’toher,kindly,whentheymether。Itisthecustomtheretosaluteanyoneyoumeetwith’Good-morning’whetheracquaintedornot。I
canimaginehowastonishedMariewasatthesefirstgreetingsfromthechildren。
\"Oncetwolittlegirlsgotholdofsomefoodandtookittoher,andcamebackandtoldme。Theysaidshehadburstintotears,andthattheylovedherverymuchnow。VerysoonafterthattheyallbecamefondofMarie,andatthesametimetheybegantodevelopthegreatestaffectionformyself。Theyoftencametomeandbeggedmetotellthemstories。IthinkImusthavetoldstorieswell,fortheydidsolovetohearthem。AtlastItooktoreadingupinterestingthingsonpurposetopassthemontothelittleones,andthiswentonforalltherestofmytimethere,threeyears。Later,wheneveryone——evenSchneider——wasangrywithmeforhidingnothingfromthechildren,Ipointedouthowfoolishitwas,fortheyalwaysknewthings,onlytheylearnttheminawaythatsoiledtheirmindsbutnotsofromme。Onehasonlytorememberone’sownchildhoodtoadmitthetruthofthis。
Butnobodywasconvinced……ItwastwoweeksbeforehermotherdiedthatIhadkissedMarie;andwhentheclergymanpreachedthatsermonthechildrenwereallonmyside。
\"WhenItoldthemwhatashameitwasoftheparsontotalkashehaddone,andexplainedmyreason,theyweresoangrythatsomeofthemwentandbrokehiswindowswithstones。OfcourseI
stoppedthem,forthatwasnotright,butallthevillageheardofit,andhowIcaughtitforspoilingthechildren!EveryonediscoverednowthatthelittleoneshadtakentobeingfondofMarie,andtheirparentswereterriblyalarmed;butMariewassohappy。Thechildrenwereforbiddentomeether;buttheyusedtorunoutofthevillagetotheherdandtakeherfoodandthings;
andsometimesjustranoffthereandkissedher,andsaid,’Jevousaime,Marie!’andthentrottedbackagain。TheyimaginedthatIwasinlovewithMarie,andthiswastheonlypointonwhichIdidnotundeceivethem,fortheygotsuchenjoymentoutofit。Andwhatdelicacyandtendernesstheyshowed!
\"IntheeveningIusedtowalktothewaterfall。Therewasaspottherewhichwasquiteclosedinandhiddenfromviewbylargetrees;andtothisspotthechildrenusedtocometome。TheycouldnotbearthattheirdearLeonshouldloveapoorgirlwithoutshoestoherfeetanddressedallinragsandtatters。
So,wouldyoubelieveit,theyactuallyclubbedtogether,somehow,andboughthershoesandstockings,andsomelinen,andevenadress!Ican’tunderstandhowtheymanagedit,buttheydidit,alltogether。WhenIaskedthemaboutittheyonlylaughedandshouted,andthelittlegirlsclappedtheirhandsandkissedme。IsometimeswenttoseeMariesecretly,too。Shehadbecomeveryill,andcouldhardlywalk。Shestillwentwiththeherd,butcouldnothelptheherdsmananylonger。Sheusedtositonastonenear,andwaittherealmostmotionlessallday,tilltheherdwenthome。Herconsumptionwassoadvanced,andshewassoweak,thatsheusedtositwithclosedeyes,breathingheavily。Herfacewasasthinasaskeleton’s,andsweatusedtostandonherwhitebrowinlargedrops。Ialwaysfoundhersittingjustlikethat。Iusedtocomeupquietlytolookather;
butMariewouldhearme,openhereyes,andtrembleviolentlyasshekissedmyhands。Ididnottakemyhandawaybecauseitmadeherhappytohaveit,andsoshewouldsitandcryquietly。
Sometimesshetriedtospeak;butitwasverydifficulttounderstandher。Shewasalmostlikeamadwoman,withexcitementandecstasy,wheneverIcame。Occasionallythechildrencamewithme;whentheydidso,theywouldstandsomewayoffandkeepguardoverus,soastotellmeifanybodycamenear。Thiswasagreatpleasuretothem。
\"Whenwelefther,Marieusedtorelapseatonceintoheroldcondition,andsitwithclosedeyesandmotionlesslimbs。Onedayshecouldnotgooutatall,andremainedathomeallaloneintheemptyhut;butthechildrenverysoonbecameawareofthefact,andnearlyallofthemvisitedherthatdayasshelayaloneandhelplessinhermiserablebed。
\"Fortwodaysthechildrenlookedafterher,andthen,whenthevillagepeoplegottoknowthatMariewasreallydying,someoftheoldwomencameandtookitinturnstositbyherandlookafterherabit。Ithinktheybegantobealittlesorryforherinthevillageatlast;atalleventstheydidnotinterferewiththechildrenanymore,onheraccount。
\"Marielayinastateofuncomfortabledeliriumthewholewhile;
shecougheddreadfully。Theoldwomenwouldnotletthechildrenstayintheroom;buttheyallcollectedoutsidethewindoweachmorning,ifonlyforamoment,andshouted’Bonjour,notrebonneMarie!’andMarienosoonercaughtsightof,orheardthem,andshebecamequiteanimatedatonce,and,inspiteoftheoldwomen,wouldtrytositupandnodherheadandsmileatthem,andthankthem。Thelittleonesusedtobringhernicethingsandsweetstoeat,butshecouldhardlytouchanything。Thankstothem,Iassureyou,thegirldiedalmostperfectlyhappy。Shealmostforgothermisery,andseemedtoaccepttheirloveasasortofsymbolofpardonforheroffence,thoughsheneverceasedtoconsiderherselfadreadfulsinner。Theyusedtoflutteratherwindowjustlikelittlebirds,callingout:’Noust’aimons,Marie!’
\"Shediedverysoon;Ihadthoughtshewouldlivemuchlonger。
ThedaybeforeherdeathIwenttoseeherforthelasttime,justbeforesunset。Ithinksherecognizedme,forshepressedmyhand。
\"NextmorningtheycameandtoldmethatMariewasdead。Thechildrencouldnotberestrainednow;theywentandcoveredhercoffinwithflowers,andputawreathoflovelyblossomsonherhead。Thepastordidnotthrowanymoreshamefulwordsatthepoordeadwoman;buttherewereveryfewpeopleatthefuneral。
However,whenitcametocarryingthecoffin,allthechildrenrushedup,tocarryitthemselves。Ofcoursetheycouldnotdoitalone,buttheyinsistedonhelping,andwalkedalongsideandbehind,crying。
\"Theyhaveplantedrosesallroundhergrave,andeveryyeartheylookaltertheflowersandmakeMarie’sresting-placeasbeautifulastheycan。Iwasinillodourafterallthiswiththeparentsofthechildren,andespeciallywiththeparsonandschoolmaster。SchneiderwasobligedtopromisethatIshouldnotmeetthemandtalktothem;butweconversedfromadistancebysigns,andtheyusedtowritemesweetlittlenotes。AfterwardsI
camecloserthanevertothoselittlesouls,buteventhenitwasverydeartome,tohavethemsofondofme。
\"SchneidersaidthatIdidthechildrengreatharmbymypernicious’system’;whatnonsensethatwas!Andwhatdidhemeanbymysystem?HesaidafterwardsthathebelievedIwasachildmyself——justbeforeIcameaway。’Youhavetheformandfaceofanadult’hesaid,’butasregardssoul,andcharacter,andperhapsevenintelligence,youareachildinthecompletestsenseoftheword,andalwayswillbe,ifyoulivetobesixty。’Ilaughedverymuch,forofcoursethatisnonsense。ButitisafactthatIdonotcaretobeamonggrown-uppeopleandmuchpreferthesocietyofchildren。Howeverkindpeoplemaybetome,Ineverfeelquiteathomewiththem,andamalwaysgladtogetbacktomylittlecompanions。Nowmycompanionshavealwaysbeenchildren,notbecauseIwasachildmyselfonce,butbecauseyoungthingsattractme。OnoneofthefirstdaysofmystayinSwitzerland,Iwasstrollingaboutaloneandmiserable,whenI
cameuponthechildrenrushingnoisilyoutofschool,withtheirslatesandbags,andbooks,theirgames,theirlaughterandshouts——andmysoulwentouttothem。IstoppedandlaughedhappilyasIwatchedtheirlittlefeetmovingsoquickly。Girlsandboys,laughingandcrying;forastheywenthomemanyofthemfoundtimetofightandmakepeace,toweepandplay。Iforgotmytroublesinlookingatthem。Andthen,allthosethreeyears,I
triedtounderstandwhymenshouldbeforevertormentingthemselves。Ilivedthelifeofachildthere,andthoughtI
shouldneverleavethelittlevillage;indeed,IwasfarfromthinkingthatIshouldeverreturntoRussia。ButatlastI
recognizedthefactthatSchneidercouldnotkeepmeanylonger。
Andthensomethingsoimportanthappened,thatSchneiderhimselfurgedmetodepart。Iamgoingtoseenowifcangetgoodadviceaboutit。Perhapsmylotinlifewillbechanged;butthatisnottheprincipalthing。Theprincipalthingistheentirechangethathasalreadycomeoverme。Ileftmanythingsbehindme——toomany。Theyhavegone。OnthejourneyIsaidtomyself,’Iamgoingintotheworldofmen。Idon’tknowmuch,perhaps,butanewlifehasbegunforme。’Imadeupmymindtobehonest,andsteadfastinaccomplishingmytask。PerhapsIshallmeetwithtroublesandmanydisappointments,butIhavemadeupmymindtobepoliteandsinceretoeveryone;morecannotbeaskedofme。
Peoplemayconsidermeachildiftheylike。Iamoftencalledanidiot,andatonetimeIcertainlywassoillthatIwasnearlyasbadasanidiot;butIamnotanidiotnow。HowcanIpossiblybesowhenIknowmyselfthatIamconsideredone?
\"WhenIreceivedaletterfromthosedearlittlesouls,whilepassingthroughBerlin,IonlythenrealizedhowmuchIlovedthem。Itwasvery,verypainful,gettingthatfirstlittleletter。Howmelancholytheyhadbeenwhentheysawmeoff!Foramonthbefore,theyhadbeentalkingofmydepartureandsorrowingoverit;andatthewaterfall,ofanevening,whenwepartedforthenight,theywouldhugmesotightandkissmesowarmly,farmoresothanbefore。AndeverynowandthentheywouldturnuponebyonewhenIwasalone,justtogivemeakissandahug,toshowtheirloveforme。Thewholeflockwentwithmetothestation,whichwasaboutamilefromthevillage,andeverynowandthenoneofthemwouldstoptothrowhisarmsroundme,andallthelittlegirlshadtearsintheirvoices,thoughtheytriedhardnottocry。Asthetrainsteamedoutofthestation,Isawthemallstandingontheplatformwavingtomeandcrying’Hurrah!’tilltheywerelostinthedistance。
\"Iassureyou,whenIcameinherejustnowandsawyourkindfacesIcanreadfaceswellmyheartfeltlightforthefirsttimesincethatmomentofparting。IthinkImustbeoneofthosewhoareborntobeinluck,foronedoesnotoftenmeetwithpeoplewhomonefeelshecanlovefromthefirstsightoftheirfaces;andyet,nosoonerdoIstepoutoftherailwaycarriagethanIhappenuponyou!
\"Iknowitismoreorlessashamefacedthingtospeakofone’sfeelingsbeforeothers;andyethereamItalkinglikethistoyou,andamnotabitashamedorshy。Iamanunsociablesortoffellowandshallverylikelynotcometoseeyouagainforsometime;butdon’tthinktheworseofmeforthat。ItisnotthatIdonotvalueyoursociety;andyoumustneversupposethatIhavetakenoffenceatanything。
\"Youaskedmeaboutyourfaces,andwhatIcouldreadinthem;I
willtellyouwiththegreatestpleasure。You,AdelaidaIvanovna,haveaveryhappyface;itisthemostsympatheticofthethree。
Nottospeakofyournaturalbeauty,onecanlookatyourfaceandsaytoone’sself,’Shehasthefaceofakindsister。’Youaresimpleandmerry,butyoucanseeintoanother’sheartveryquickly。That’swhatIreadinyourface。
\"Youtoo,AlexandraIvanovna,haveaverylovelyface;butI
thinkyoumayhavesomesecretsorrow。Yourheartisundoubtedlyakind,goodone,butyouarenotmerry。Thereisacertainsuspicionof’shadow’inyourface,likeinthatofHolbein’sMadonnainDresden。Somuchforyourface。HaveIguessedright?
\"Asforyourface,LizabethaProkofievna,Inotonlythink,butamperfectlySURE,thatyouareanabsolutechild——inall,inall,mind,bothgoodandbad-andinspiteofyouryears。Don’tbeangrywithmeforsayingso;youknowwhatmyfeelingsforchildrenare。AnddonotsupposethatIamsocandidoutofpuresimplicityofsoul。Ohdearno,itisbynomeansthecase!
PerhapsIhavemyownveryprofoundobjectinview。\"
VII。
Whentheprinceceasedspeakingallweregazingmerrilyathim——
evenAglaya;butLizabethaProkofievnalookedthejolliestofall。
\"Well!\"shecried,\"weHAVE’puthimthroughhispaces,’withavengeance!Mydears,youimagined,Ibelieve,thatyouwereabouttopatronizethisyounggentleman,likesomepoorprotegepickedupsomewhere,andtakenunderyourmagnificentprotection。Whatfoolswewere,andwhataspeciallybigfoolisyourfather!Welldone,prince!Iassureyouthegeneralactuallyaskedmetoputyouthroughyourpaces,andexamineyou。Astowhatyousaidaboutmyface,youareabsolutelycorrectinyourjudgment。Iamachild,andknowit。Iknewitlongbeforeyousaidso;youhaveexpressedmyownthoughts。Ithinkyournatureandminemustbeextremelyalike,andIamverygladofit。Weareliketwodropsofwater,onlyyouareamanandIawoman,andI’venotbeentoSwitzerland,andthatisallthedifferencebetweenus。\"
\"Don’tbeinahurry,mother;theprincesaysthathehassomemotivebehindhissimplicity,\"criedAglaya。
\"Yes,yes,sohedoes,\"laughedtheothers。
\"Oh,don’tyoubeginbanteringhim,\"saidmamma。\"Heisprobablyagooddealclevererthanallthreeofyougirlsputtogether。Weshallsee。Onlyyouhaven’ttoldusanythingaboutAglayayet,prince;andAglayaandIarebothwaitingtohear。\"
\"Icannotsayanythingatpresent。I’lltellyouafterwards。\"
\"Why?Herfaceisclearenough,isn’tit?\"
\"Ohyes,ofcourse。Youareverybeautiful,AglayaIvanovna,sobeautifulthatoneisafraidtolookatyou。\"
\"Isthatall?Whatabouthercharacter?\"persistedMrs。Epanchin。
\"Itisdifficulttojudgewhensuchbeautyisconcerned。Ihavenotpreparedmyjudgment。Beautyisariddle。\"
\"ThatmeansthatyouhavesetAglayaariddle!\"saidAdelaida。
\"Guessit,Aglaya!Butshe’spretty,prince,isn’tshe?\"
\"Mostwonderfullyso,\"saidthelatter,warmly,gazingatAglayawithadmiration。\"AlmostaslovelyasNastasiaPhilipovna,butquiteadifferenttype。\"
Allpresentexchangedlooksofsurprise。
\"AslovelyasWHO?\"saidMrs。Epanchin。\"AsNASTASIAPHILIPOVNA?
WherehaveyouseenNastasiaPhilipovna?WhatNastasiaPhilipovna?\"
\"GavrilaArdalionovitchshowedthegeneralherportraitjustnow。\"
\"Howso?Didhebringtheportraitformyhusband?\"
\"Onlytoshowit。NastasiaPhilipovnagaveittoGavrilaArdalionovitchtoday,andthelatterbroughtitheretoshowtothegeneral。\"
\"Imustseeit!\"criedMrs。Epanchin。\"Whereistheportrait?Ifshegaveittohim,hemusthaveit;andheisstillinthestudy。Heneverleavesbeforefouro’clockonWednesdays。SendforGavrilaArdalionovitchatonce。No,Idon’tlongtoseeHIM
somuch。Lookhere,dearprince,BEsokind,willyou?Juststeptothestudyandfetchthisportrait!Saywewanttolookatit。
Pleasedothisforme,willyou?\"
\"Heisanicefellow,butalittletoosimple,\"saidAdelaida,astheprincelefttheroom。
\"Heis,indeed,\"saidAlexandra;\"almostlaughablysoattimes。\"
Neitheronenortheotherseemedtogiveexpressiontoherfullthoughts。
\"Hegotoutofitveryneatlyaboutourfaces,though,\"saidAglaya。Heflatteredusallround,evenmamma。\"
\"Nonsense\"criedthelatter。\"Hedidnotflatterme。ItwasIwhofoundhisappreciationflattering。Ithinkyouareagreatdealmorefoolishthanheis。Heissimple,ofcourse,butalsoveryknowing。Justlikemyself。\"
\"Howstupidofmetospeakoftheportrait,\"thoughttheprinceasheenteredthestudy,withafeelingofguiltathisheart,\"andyet,perhapsIwasrightafterall。\"Hehadanidea,unformedasyet,butastrangeidea。
GavrilaArdalionovitchwasstillsittinginthestudy,buriedinamassofpapers。Helookedasthoughhedidnottakehissalaryfromthepubliccompany,whoseservanthewas,forasinecure。
Hegrewverywrothandconfusedwhentheprinceaskedfortheportrait,andexplainedhowitcameaboutthathehadspokenofit。
\"Oh,curseitall,\"hesaid;\"whatonearthmustyougoblabbingfor?Youknownothingaboutthething,andyet——idiot!\"headded,mutteringthelastwordtohimselfinirrepressiblerage。
\"Iamverysorry;Iwasnotthinkingatthetime。ImerelysaidthatAglayawasalmostasbeautifulasNastasiaPhilipovna。\"
Ganiaaskedforfurtherdetails;andtheprinceoncemorerepeatedtheconversation。Ganialookedathimwithironicalcontemptthewhile。
\"NastasiaPhilipovna,\"hebegan,andtherepaused;hewasclearlymuchagitatedandannoyed。Theprinceremindedhimoftheportrait。
\"Listen,prince,\"saidGania,asthoughanideahadjuststruckhim,\"Iwishtoaskyouagreatfavour,andyetIreallydon’tknow——\"
Hepausedagain,hewastryingtomakeuphismindtosomething,andwasturningthematterover。Theprincewaitedquietly。OncemoreGaniafixedhimwithintentandquestioningeyes。
\"Prince,\"hebeganagain,\"theyareratherangrywithme,inthere,owingtoacircumstancewhichIneednotexplain,sothatIdonotcaretogoinatpresentwithoutaninvitation。I
particularlywishtospeaktoAglaya,butIhavewrittenafewwordsincaseIshallnothavethechanceofseeingher\"heretheprinceobservedasmallnoteinhishand,\"andIdonotknowhowtogetmycommunicationtoher。Don’tyouthinkyoucouldundertaketogiveittoheratonce,butonlytoher,mind,andsothatnooneelseshouldseeyougiveit?Itisn’tmuchofasecret,butstill——Well,willyoudoit?\"
\"Idon’tquitelikeit,\"repliedtheprince。
\"Oh,butitisabsolutelynecessaryforme,\"Ganiaentreated。
\"Believeme,ifitwerenotso,Iwouldnotaskyou;howelseamItogetittoher?Itismostimportant,dreadfullyimportant!\"
Ganiawasevidentlymuchalarmedattheideathattheprincewouldnotconsenttotakehisnote,andhelookedathimnowwithanexpressionofabsoluteentreaty。
\"Well,Iwilltakeitthen。\"
\"Butmind,nobodyistosee!\"criedthedelightedGania\"AndofcourseImayrelyonyourwordofhonour,eh?\"
\"Iwon’tshowittoanyone,\"saidtheprince。
\"Theletterisnotsealed——\"continuedGania,andpausedinconfusion。
\"Oh,Iwon’treadit,\"saidtheprince,quitesimply。
Hetookuptheportrait,andwentoutoftheroom。
Gania,leftalone,clutchedhisheadwithhishands。
\"Onewordfromher,\"hesaid,\"onewordfromher,andImayyetbefree。\"
Hecouldnotsettlehimselftohispapersagain,foragitationandexcitement,butbeganwalkingupanddowntheroomfromcornertocorner。
Theprincewalkedalong,musing。Hedidnotlikehiscommission,anddislikedtheideaofGaniasendinganotetoAglayaatall;butwhenhewastworoomsdistantfromthedrawing-room,wheretheyallwere,hestoppedathoughrecallingsomething;wenttothewindow,nearerthelight,andbegantoexaminetheportraitinhishand。
HelongedtosolvethemysteryofsomethinginthefaceNastasiaPhilipovna,somethingwhichhadstruckhimashelookedattheportraitforthefirsttime;theimpressionhadnotlefthim。Itwaspartlythefactofhermarvellousbeautythatstruckhim,andpartlysomethingelse。Therewasasuggestionofimmenseprideanddisdaininthefacealmostofhatred,andatthesametimesomethingconfidingandveryfullofsimplicity。Thecontrastarousedadeepsympathyinhisheartashelookedatthelovelyface。Theblindinglovelinessofitwasalmostintolerable,thispalethinfacewithitsflamingeyes;itwasastrangebeauty。
Theprincegazedatitforaminuteortwo,thenglancedaroundhim,andhurriedlyraisedtheportraittohislips。When,aminuteafter,hereachedthedrawing-roomdoor,hisfacewasquitecomposed。ButjustashereachedthedoorhemetAglayacomingoutalone。
\"GavrilaArdalionovitchbeggedmetogiveyouthis,\"hesaid,handingherthenote。
Aglayastopped,tooktheletter,andgazedstrangelyintotheprince’seyes。Therewasnoconfusioninherface;alittlesurprise,perhaps,butthatwasall。ByherlooksheseemedmerelytochallengetheprincetoanexplanationastohowheandGaniahappenedtobeconnectedinthismatter。Butherexpressionwasperfectlycoolandquiet,andevencondescending。
Sotheystoodforamomentortwo,confrontingoneanother。Atlengthafaintsmilepassedoverherface,andshepassedbyhimwithoutaword。
Mrs。EpanchinexaminedtheportraitofNastasiaPhilipovnaforsomelittlewhile,holdingitcriticallyatarm’slength。
\"Yes,sheispretty,\"shesaidatlast,\"evenverypretty。Ihaveseenhertwice,butonlyatadistance。Soyouadmirethiskindofbeauty,doyou?\"sheaskedtheprince,suddenly。
\"Yes,Ido——thiskind。\"
\"Doyoumeanespeciallythiskind?\"
\"Yes,especiallythiskind。\"
\"Why?\"
\"Thereismuchsufferinginthisface,\"murmuredtheprince,moreasthoughtalkingtohimselfthanansweringthequestion。
\"Ithinkyouarewanderingalittle,prince,\"Mrs。Epanchindecided,afteralengthenedsurveyofhisface;andshetossedtheportraitontothetable,haughtily。
Alexandratookit,andAdelaidacameup,andboththegirlsexaminedthephotograph。JustthenAglayaenteredtheroom。
\"Whatapower!\"criedAdelaidasuddenly,assheearnestlyexaminedtheportraitoverhersister’sshoulder。
\"Whom?Whatpower?\"askedhermother,crossly。
\"Suchbeautyisrealpower,\"saidAdelaida。\"Withsuchbeautyasthatonemightoverthrowtheworld。\"Shereturnedtohereaselthoughtfully。
Aglayamerelyglancedattheportrait——frowned,andputoutherunderlip;thenwentandsatdownonthesofawithfoldedhands。
Mrs。Epanchinrangthebell。
\"AskGavrilaArdalionovitchtostepthisway,\"saidshetothemanwhoanswered。
\"Mamma!\"criedAlexandra,significantly。
\"Ishalljustsaytwowordstohim,that’sall,\"saidhermother,silencingallobjectionbyhermanner;shewasevidentlyseriouslyputout。\"Yousee,prince,itisallsecretswithus,justnow——allsecrets。Itseemstobetheetiquetteofthehouse,forsomereasonor,other。Stupidnonsense,andinamatterwhichoughttobeapproachedwithallcandourandopen-
heartedness。Thereisamarriagebeingtalkedof,andIdon’tlikethismarriage——\"
\"Mamma,whatareyousaying?\"saidAlexandraagain,hurriedly。
\"Well,what,mydeargirl?Asifyoucanpossiblylikeityourself?Theheartisthegreatthing,andtherestisallrubbish——thoughonemusthavesenseaswell。Perhapssenseisreallythegreatthing。Don’tsmilelikethat,Aglaya。Idon’tcontradictmyself。Afoolwithaheartandnobrainsisjustasunhappyasafoolwithbrainsandnoheart。Iamoneandyouaretheother,andthereforebothofussuffer,bothofusareunhappy。\"
\"Whyareyousounhappy,mother?\"askedAdelaida,whoaloneofallthecompanyseemedtohavepreservedhergoodtemperandspiritsuptonow。
\"Inthefirstplace,becauseofmycarefullybrought-updaughters,\"saidMrs。Epanchin,cuttingly;\"andasthatisthebestreasonIcangiveyouweneednotbotheraboutanyotheratpresent。Enoughofwords,now!WeshallseehowbothofyouI
don’tcountAglayawillmanageyourbusiness,andwhetheryou,mostreveredAlexandraIvanovna,willbehappywithyourfinemate。\"
\"Ah!\"sheadded,asGaniasuddenlyenteredtheroom,\"here’sanothermarryingsubject。Howdoyoudo?\"shecontinued,inresponsetoGania’sbow;butshedidnotinvitehimtositdown。
\"Youaregoingtobemarried?\"
\"Married?how——whatmarriage?\"murmuredGania,overwhelmedwithconfusion。
\"Areyouabouttotakeawife?Iask,——ifyoupreferthatexpression。\"
\"No,noI-I——no!\"saidGania,bringingouthisliewithatell-
taleblushofshame。HeglancedkeenlyatAglaya,whowassittingsomewayoff,anddroppedhiseyesimmediately。
Aglayagazedcoldly,intently,andcomposedlyathim,withouttakinghereyesoffhisface,andwatchedhisconfusion。
\"No?Yousayno,doyou?\"continuedthepitilessMrs。General。
\"Verywell,IshallrememberthatyoutoldmethisWednesdaymorning,inanswertomyquestion,thatyouarenotgoingtobemarried。Whatdayisit,Wednesday,isn’tit?\"
\"Yes,Ithinkso!\"saidAdelaida。
\"Youneverknowthedayoftheweek;what’sthedayofthemonth?\"
\"Twenty-seventh!\"saidGania。
\"Twenty-seventh;verywell。Good-byenow;youhaveagooddealtodo,I’msure,andImustdressandgoout。Takeyourportrait。
Givemyrespectstoyourunfortunatemother,NinaAlexandrovna。
Aurevoir,dearprince,comeinandseeusoften,do;andIshalltelloldPrincessBielokonskiaboutyou。Ishallgoandseeheronpurpose。Andlisten,mydearboy,IfeelsurethatGodhassentyoutoPetersburgfromSwitzerlandonpurposeforme。Maybeyouwillhaveotherthingstodo,besides,butyouaresentchieflyformysake,Ifeelsureofit。Godsentyoutome!Aurevoir!Alexandra,comewithme,mydear。\"
Mrs。Epanchinlefttheroom。
Gania——confused,annoyed,furious——tookuphisportrait,andturnedtotheprincewithanastysmileonhisface。
\"Prince,\"hesaid,\"Iamjustgoinghome。Ifyouhavenotchangedyourmindastolivingwithus,perhapsyouwouldliketocomewithme。Youdon’tknowtheaddress,Ibelieve?\"
\"Waitaminute,prince,\"saidAglaya,suddenlyrisingfromherseat,\"dowritesomethinginmyalbumfirst,willyou?Fathersaysyouareamosttalentedcaligraphist;I’llbringyoumybookinaminute。\"Shelefttheroom。
\"Well,aurevoir,prince,\"saidAdelaida,\"Imustbegoingtoo。\"
Shepressedtheprince’shandwarmly,andgavehimafriendlysmileasshelefttheroom。ShedidnotsomuchaslookatGania。
\"Thisisyourdoing,prince,\"saidGania,turningonthelattersosoonastheotherswerealloutoftheroom。\"Thisisyourdoing,sir!YOUhavebeentellingthemthatIamgoingtobemarried!\"Hesaidthisinahurriedwhisper,hiseyesflashingwithrageandhisfaceablaze。\"Youshamelesstattler!\"
\"Iassureyou,youareunderadelusion,\"saidtheprince,calmlyandpolitely。\"Ididnotevenknowthatyouweretobemarried。\"
\"Youheardmetalkingaboutit,thegeneralandme。YouheardmesaythateverythingwastobesettledtodayatNastasiaPhilipovna’s,andyouwentandblurteditouthere。Youlieifyoudenyit。WhoelsecouldhavetoldthemDeviltakeit,sir,whocouldhavetoldthemexceptyourself?Didn’ttheoldwomanasgoodashintasmuchtome?\"
\"Ifshehintedtoyouwhotoldheryoumustknowbest,ofcourse;
butIneversaidawordaboutit。\"
\"Didyougivemynote?Isthereananswer?\"interruptedGania,impatiently。
ButatthismomentAglayacameback,andtheprincehadnotimetoreply。
\"There,prince,\"saidshe,\"there’smyalbum。Nowchooseapageandwritemesomething,willyou?There’sapen,anewone;doyoumindasteelone?Ihaveheardthatyoucaligraphistsdon’tlikesteelpens。\"
Conversingwiththeprince,AglayadidnotevenseemtonoticethatGaniawasintheroom。Butwhiletheprincewasgettinghispenready,findingapage,andmakinghispreparationstowrite,GaniacameuptothefireplacewhereAglayawasstanding,totherightoftheprince,andintrembling,brokenaccentssaid,almostinherear:
\"Oneword,justonewordfromyou,andI’msaved。\"
Theprinceturnedsharplyroundandlookedatbothofthem。
Gania’sfacewasfullofrealdespair;heseemedtohavesaidthewordsalmostunconsciouslyandontheimpulseofthemoment。
Aglayagazedathimforsomesecondswithpreciselythesamecomposureandcalmastonishmentasshehadshownalittlewhilebefore,whentheprincehandedherthenote,anditappearedthatthiscalmsurpriseandseeminglyabsoluteincomprehensionofwhatwassaidtoher,weremoreterriblyoverwhelmingtoGaniathaneventhemostplainlyexpresseddisdainwouldhavebeen。
\"WhatshallIwrite?\"askedtheprince。
\"I’lldictatetoyou,\"saidAglaya,cominguptothetable。\"Nowthen,areyouready?Write,’Inevercondescendtobargain!’Nowputyournameandthedate。Letmeseeit。\"
Theprincehandedherthealbum。
\"Capital!Howbeautifullyyouhavewrittenit!Thankssomuch。Aurevoir,prince。Waitaminute,\";sheadded,\"Iwanttogiveyousomethingforakeepsake。Comewithmethisway,willyou?\"
Theprincefollowedher。Arrivedatthedining-room,shestopped。
\"Readthis,\"shesaid,handinghimGania’snote。
Theprincetookitfromherhand,butgazedatherinbewilderment。
\"Oh!IKNOWyouhaven’treadit,andthatyoucouldneverbethatman’saccomplice。Readit,Iwishyoutoreadit。\"
Theletterhadevidentlybeenwritteninahurry:
\"Myfateistobedecidedtoday\"itran,\"youknowhow。ThisdayImustgivemywordirrevocably。Ihavenorighttoaskyourhelp,andIdarenotallowmyselftoindulgeinanyhopes;butonceyousaidjustoneword,andthatwordlightedupthenightofmylife,andbecamethebeaconofmydays。Sayonemoresuchword,andsavemefromutterruin。Onlytellme,’breakoffthewholething!’andIwilldosothisveryday。Oh!whatcanitcostyoutosayjustthisoneword?Indoingsoyouwillbutbegivingmeasignofyoursympathyforme,andofyourpity;onlythis,onlythis;nothingmore,NOTHING。Idarenotindulgeinanyhope,becauseIamunworthyofit。Butifyousaybutthisword,Iwilltakeupmycrossagainwithjoy,andreturnoncemoretomybattlewithpoverty。Ishallmeetthestormandbegladofit;
Ishallriseupwithrenewedstrength。
\"Sendmebackthenthisonewordofsympathy,onlysympathy,I
sweartoyou;andoh!donotbeangrywiththeaudacityofdespair,withthedrowningmanwhohasdaredtomakethislastefforttosavehimselffromperishingbeneaththewaters。
\"G。L。\"
\"Thismanassuresme,\"saidAglaya,scornfully,whentheprincehadfinishedreadingtheletter,\"thatthewords’breakoffeverything’donotcommitmetoanythingwhatever;andhimselfgivesmeawrittenguaranteetothateffect,inthisletter。