\"Yehavesaidyeshouldcontinueuponthisroad,whichisourdirectionlikewise;whereforemylord,theearlGrip,hathgivencommandmentthatyeretainthehorsesandride,andthatcertainofusridewithyeatwentymiletoafairtownthathightCambenet,whensoyeshallbeoutofperil.\"
Wecoulddonothinglessthanexpressourthanksandaccepttheoffer.
Wejoggedalong,sixintheparty,atamoderateandcomfortablegait,andinconversationlearnedthatmylordGripwasaverygreatpersonageinhisownregion,whichlayaday\'sjourneybeyondCambenet.Weloiteredtosuchadegreethatitwasnearthemiddleoftheforenoonwhenweenteredthemarketsquareofthetown.Wedismounted,andleftourthanksoncemoreformylord,andthenapproachedacrowdassembledinthecenterofthesquare,toseewhatmightbetheobjectofinterest.Itwastheremnantofthatoldperegrinatingbandofslaves!Sotheyhadbeendraggingtheirchainsabout,allthiswearytime.Thatpoorhusbandwasgone,andalsomanyothers;andsomefewpurchaseshadbeenaddedtothegang.Thekingwasnotinterested,andwantedtomovealong,butIwasabsorbed,andfullofpity.Icouldnottakemyeyesawayfromthesewornandwastedwrecksofhumanity.Theretheysat,groundedupontheground,silent,uncomplaining,withbowedheads,apatheticsight.Andbyhideouscontrast,aredundantoratorwasmakingaspeechtoanothergatheringnotthirtystepsaway,infulsomelaudationof\"ourgloriousBritishliberties!\"
Iwasboiling.IhadforgottenIwasaplebeian,IwasrememberingI
wasaman.Costwhatitmight,Iwouldmountthatrostrumand——
Click!thekingandIwerehandcuffedtogether!Ourcompanions,thoseservants,haddoneit;mylordGripstoodlookingon.Thekingburstoutinafury,andsaid:
\"Whatmeaneththisill-manneredjest?\"
Mylordmerelysaidtohisheadmiscreant,coolly:
\"Putuptheslavesandsellthem!\"
SLAVES!Thewordhadanewsound——andhowunspeakablyawful!Thekingliftedhismanaclesandbroughtthemdownwithadeadlyforce;butmylordwasoutofthewaywhentheyarrived.Adozenoftherascal\'sservantssprangforward,andinamomentwewerehelpless,withourhandsboundbehindus.Wesoloudlyandsoearnestlyproclaimedourselvesfreemen,thatwegottheinterestedattentionofthatliberty-mouthingoratorandhispatrioticcrowd,andtheygatheredaboutusandassumedaverydeterminedattitude.Theoratorsaid:
\"If,indeed,yearefreemen,yehavenoughttofear——theGod-givenlibertiesofBritainareaboutyeforyourshieldandshelter!Applause.
Yeshallsoonsee.Bringforthyourproofs.\"
\"Whatproofs?\"
\"Proofthatyearefreemen.\"
Ah——Iremembered!Icametomyself;Isaidnothing.Butthekingstormedout:
\"Thou\'rtinsane,man.Itwerebetter,andmoreinreason,thatthisthiefandscoundrelhereprovethatweareNOTfreemen.\"
Yousee,heknewhisownlawsjustasotherpeoplesooftenknowthelaws;bywords,notbyeffects.TheytakeaMEANING,andgettobeveryvivid,whenyoucometoapplythemtoyourself.
Allhandsshooktheirheadsandlookeddisappointed;someturnedaway,nolongerinterested.Theoratorsaid——andthistimeinthetonesofbusiness,notofsentiment:
\"Anyedonotknowyourcountry\'slaws,itweretimeyelearnedthem.
Yearestrangerstous;yewillnotdenythat.Yemaybefreemen,wedonotdenythat;butalsoyemaybeslaves.Thelawisclear:itdothnotrequiretheclaimanttoproveyeareslaves,itrequirethyoutoproveyearenot.\"
Isaid:
\"Dearsir,giveusonlytimetosendtoAstolat;orgiveusonlytimetosendtotheValleyofHoliness——\"
\"Peace,goodman,theseareextraordinaryrequests,andyoumaynothopetohavethemgranted.Itwouldcostmuchtime,andwouldunwarrantablyinconvenienceyourmaster——\"
\"MASTER,idiot!\"stormedtheking.\"Ihavenomaster,Imyselfamthem——\"
\"Silence,forGod\'ssake!\"
Igotthewordsoutintimetostoptheking.Wewereintroubleenoughalready;itcouldnothelpusanytogivethesepeoplethenotionthatwewerelunatics.
Thereisnouseinstringingoutthedetails.Theearlputusupandsoldusatauction.ThissameinfernallawhadexistedinourownSouthinmyowntime,morethanthirteenhundredyearslater,andunderithundredsoffreemenwhocouldnotprovethattheywerefreemenhadbeensoldintolifelongslaverywithoutthecircumstancemakinganyparticularimpressionuponme;buttheminutelawandtheauctionblockcameintomypersonalexperience,athingwhichhadbeenmerelyimproperbeforebecamesuddenlyhellish.Well,that\'sthewaywearemade.
Yes,weweresoldatauction,likeswine.Inabigtownandanactivemarketweshouldhavebroughtagoodprice;butthisplacewasutterlystagnantandsowesoldatafigurewhichmakesmeashamed,everytimeIthinkofit.TheKingofEnglandbroughtsevendollars,andhisprimeministernine;whereasthekingwaseasilyworthtwelvedollarsandIaseasilyworthfifteen.Butthatisthewaythingsalwaysgo;ifyouforceasaleonadullmarket,Idon\'tcarewhatthepropertyis,youaregoingtomakeapoorbusinessofit,andyoucanmakeupyourmindtoit.Iftheearlhadhadwitenoughto——
However,thereisnooccasionformyworkingmysympathiesuponhisaccount.Lethimgo,forthepresent;Itookhisnumber,sotospeak.
Theslave-dealerboughtusboth,andhitchedusontothatlongchainofhis,andweconstitutedtherearofhisprocession.WetookupourlineofmarchandpassedoutofCambenetatnoon;anditseemedtomeunaccountablystrangeandoddthattheKingofEnglandandhischiefminister,marchingmanacledandfetteredandyoked,inaslaveconvoy,couldmovebyallmannerofidlemenandwomen,andunderwindowswheresatthesweetandthelovely,andyetneverattractacuriouseye,neverprovokeasingleremark.Dear,dear,itonlyshowsthatthereisnothingdivineraboutakingthanthereisaboutatramp,afterall.Heisjustacheapandhollowartificialitywhenyoudon\'tknowheisaking.Butrevealhisquality,anddearmeittakesyourverybreathawaytolookathim.Ireckonweareallfools.
Bornso,nodoubt.
AConnecticutYankeeinKingArthur\'sCourt-Chapter35Chapter35-APitifulIncidentIT\'Saworldofsurprises.Thekingbrooded;thiswasnatural.Whatwouldhebroodabout,shouldyousay?Why,abouttheprodigiousnatureofhisfall,ofcourse——fromtheloftiestplaceintheworldtothelowest;
fromthemostillustriousstationintheworldtotheobscurest;fromthegrandestvocationamongmentothebasest.No,Itakemyoaththatthethingthatgraveledhimmost,tostartwith,wasnotthis,butthepricehehadfetched!Hecouldn\'tseemtogetoverthatsevendollars.Well,itstunnedmeso,whenIfirstfounditout,thatIcouldn\'tbelieveit;
itdidn\'tseemnatural.ButassoonasmymentalsightclearedandIgotarightfocusonit,IsawIwasmistaken;itWASnatural.Forthisreason:
akingisamereartificiality,andsoaking\'sfeelings,liketheimpulsesofanautomaticdoll,aremereartificialities;butasaman,heisareality,andhisfeelings,asaman,arereal,notphantoms.Itshamestheaveragemantobevaluedbelowhisownestimateofhisworth,andthekingcertainlywasn\'tanythingmorethananaverageman,ifhewasupthathigh.
Confoundhim,heweariedmewithargumentstoshowthatinanythinglikeafairmarkethewouldhavefetchedtwenty-fivedollars,sure——athingwhichwasplainlynonsense,andfullorthebaldestconceit;Iwasn\'tworthitmyself.Butitwastendergroundformetoargueon.Infact,Ihadtosimplyshirkargumentanddothediplomaticinstead.Ihadtothrowconscienceaside,andbrazenlyconcedethatheoughttohavebroughttwenty-fivedollars;whereasIwasquitewellawarethatinalltheages,theworldhadneverseenakingthatwasworthhalfthemoney,andduringthenextthirteencenturieswouldn\'tseeonethatwasworththefourthofit.Yes,hetiredme.Ifhebegantotalkaboutthecrops;orabouttherecentweather;orabouttheconditionofpolitics;oraboutdogs,orcats,ormorals,ortheology——nomatterwhat——Isighed,forIknewwhatwascoming;hewasgoingtogetoutofitapalliationofthattiresomeseven-dollarsale.Whereverwehaltedwheretherewasacrowd,hewouldgivemealookwhichsaidplainly:\"ifthatthingcouldbetriedoveragainnow,withthiskindoffolk,youwouldseeadifferentresult.\"Well,whenhewasfirstsold,itsecretlytickledmetoseehimgoforsevendollars;
butbeforehewasdonewithhissweatingandworryingIwishedhehadfetchedahundred.Thethingnevergotachancetodie,foreveryday,atoneplaceoranother,possiblepurchaserslookedusover,and,asoftenasanyotherway,theircommentonthekingwassomethinglikethis:
\"Here\'satwo-dollar-and-a-halfchumpwithathirtydollarstyle.Pitybutstylewasmarketable.\"
Atlastthissortofremarkproducedanevilresult.Ourownerwasapracticalpersonandheperceivedthatthisdefectmustbemendedifhehopedtofindapurchaserfortheking.Sohewenttoworktotakethestyleoutofhissacredmajesty.Icouldhavegiventhemansomevaluableadvice,butIdidn\'t;youmustn\'tvolunteeradvicetoaslave-driverunlessyouwanttodamagethecauseyouarearguingfor.Ihadfounditasufficientlydifficultjobtoreducetheking\'sstyletoapeasant\'sstyle,evenwhenhewasawillingandanxiouspupil;nowthen,toundertaketoreducetheking\'sstyletoaslave\'sstyle——andbyforce——goto!itwasastatelycontract.Nevermindthedetails——itwillsavemetroubletoletyouimaginethem.Iwillonlyremarkthatattheendofaweektherewasplentyofevidencethatlashandclubandfisthaddonetheirworkwell;theking\'sbodywasasighttosee——andtoweepover;buthisspirit?——why,itwasn\'tevenphased.Eventhatdullclodofaslave-driverwasabletoseethattherecanbesuchathingasaslavewhowillremainamantillhedies;whosebonesyoucanbreak,butwhosemanhoodyoucan\'t.Thismanfoundthatfromhisfirsteffortdowntohislatest,hecouldn\'tevercomewithinreachoftheking,butthekingwasreadytoplungeforhim,anddidit.Sohegaveupatlast,andleftthekinginpossessionofhisstyleunimpaired.Thefactis,thekingwasagooddealmorethanaking,hewasaman;andwhenamanisaman,youcan\'tknockitoutofhim.
Wehadaroughtimeforamonth,trampingtoandfrointheearth,andsuffering.AndwhatEnglishmanwasthemostinterestedintheslaveryquestionbythattime?Hisgracetheking!Yes;frombeingthemostindifferent,hewasbecomethemostinterested.HewasbecomethebitteresthateroftheinstitutionIhadeverheardtalk.AndsoIventuredtoaskoncemoreaquestionwhichIhadaskedyearsbeforeandhadgottensuchasharpanswerthatIhadnotthoughtitprudenttomeddleinthematterfurther.Wouldheabolishslavery?
Hisanswerwasassharpasbefore,butitwasmusicthistime;Ishouldn\'teverwishtohearpleasanter,thoughtheprofanitywasnotgood,beingawkwardlyputtogether,andwiththecrash-wordalmostinthemiddleinsteadofattheend,where,ofcourse,itoughttohavebeen.
Iwasreadyandwillingtogetfreenow;Ihadn\'twantedtogetfreeanysooner.No,Icannotquitesaythat.Ihadwantedto,butIhadnotbeenwillingtotakedesperatechances,andhadalwaysdissuadedthekingfromthem.Butnow——ah,itwasanewatmosphere!Libertywouldbeworthanycostthatmightbeputuponitnow.Isetaboutaplan,andwasstraightwaycharmedwithit.Itwouldrequiretime,yes,andpatience,too,agreatdealofboth.Onecouldinventquickerways,andfullyassureones;butnonethatwouldbeaspicturesqueasthis;nonethatcouldbemadesodramatic.
AndsoIwasnotgoingtogivethisoneup.Itmightdelayusmonths,butnomatter,Iwouldcarryitoutorbreaksomething.
Nowandthenwehadanadventure.Onenightwewereovertakenbyasnow-stormwhilestillamilefromthevillageweweremakingfor.Almostinstantlywewereshutupasinafog,thedrivingsnowwassothick.Youcouldn\'tseeathing,andweweresoonlost.Theslave-driverlashedusdesperately,forhesawruinbeforehim,buthislashingsonlymademattersworse,fortheydroveusfurtherfromtheroadandfromlikelihoodofsuccor.Sowehadtostopatlastandslumpdowninthesnowwherewewere.Thestormcontinueduntiltowardmidnight,thenceased.Bythistimetwoofourfeeblermenandthreeofourwomenweredead,andotherspastmovingandthreatenedwithdeath.Ourmasterwasnearlybesidehimself.Hestirreduptheliving,andmadeusstand,jump,slapourselves,torestoreourcirculation,andhehelpedaswellashecouldwithhiswhip.
Nowcameadiversion.Weheardshrieksandyells,andsoonawomancamerunningandcrying;andseeingourgroup,sheflungherselfintoourmidstandbeggedforprotection.Amobofpeoplecametearingafterher,somewithtorches,andtheysaidshewasawitchwhohadcausedseveralcowstodiebyastrangedisease,andpracticedherartsbyhelpofadevilintheformofablackcat.Thispoorwomanhadbeenstoneduntilshehardlylookedhuman,shewassobatteredandbloody.Themobwantedtoburnher.
Well,now,whatdoyousupposeourmasterdid?Whenweclosedaroundthispoorcreaturetoshelterher,hesawhischance.Hesaid,burnherhere,ortheyshouldn\'thaveheratall.Imaginethat!Theywerewilling.
Theyfastenedhertoapost;theybroughtwoodandpileditabouther;
theyappliedthetorchwhilesheshriekedandpleadedandstrainedhertwoyoungdaughterstoherbreast;andourbrute,withaheartsolelyforbusiness,lashedusintopositionaboutthestakeandwarmedusintolifeandcommercialvaluebythesamefirewhichtookawaytheinnocentlifeofthatpoorharmlessmother.Thatwasthesortofmasterwehad.ItookHISnumber.Thatsnow-stormcosthimnineofhisflock;andhewasmorebrutaltousthanever,afterthat,formanydaystogether,hewassoenragedoverhisloss.
Wehadadventuresallalong.Onedayweranintoaprocession.Andsuchaprocession!Alltheriffraffofthekingdomseemedtobecomprehendedinit;andalldrunkatthat.Inthevanwasacartwithacoffininit,andonthecoffinsatacomelyyounggirlofabouteighteensucklingababy,whichshesqueezedtoherbreastinapassionofloveeverylittlewhile,andeverylittlewhilewipedfromitsfacethetearswhichhereyesraineddownuponit;andalwaysthefoolishlittlethingsmiledupather,happyandcontent,kneadingherbreastwithitsdimpledfathand,whichshepattedandfondledrightoverherbreakingheart.
Menandwomen,boysandgirls,trottedalongbesideorafterthecart,hooting,shoutingprofaneandribaldremarks,singingsnatchesoffoulsong,skipping,dancing——averyholidayofhellions,asickeningsight.
WehadstruckasuburbofLondon,outsidethewalls,andthiswasasampleofonesortofLondonsociety.Ourmastersecuredagoodplaceforusnearthegallows.Apriestwasinattendance,andhehelpedthegirlclimbup,andsaidcomfortingwordstoher,andmadetheunder-sheriffprovideastoolforher.Thenhestoodtherebyheronthegallows,andforamomentlookeddownuponthemassofupturnedfacesathisfeet,thenoutoverthesolidpavementofheadsthatstretchedawayoneverysideoccupyingthevacanciesfarandnear,andthenbegantotellthestoryofthecase.
Andtherewaspityinhisvoice——howseldomasoundthatwasinthatignorantandsavageland!Iremembereverydetailofwhathesaid,exceptthewordshesaiditin;andsoIchangeitintomyownwords:
\"Lawisintendedtometeoutjustice.Sometimesitfails.Thiscannotbehelped.Wecanonlygrieve,andberesigned,andprayforthesoulofhimwhofallsunfairlybythearmofthelaw,andthathisfellowsmaybefew.Alawsendsthispooryoungthingtodeath——anditisright.
Butanotherlawhadplacedherwhereshemustcommithercrimeorstarvewithherchild——andbeforeGodthatlawisresponsibleforbothhercrimeandherignominiousdeath!
\"Alittlewhileagothisyoungthing,thischildofeighteenyears,wasashappyawifeandmotherasanyinEngland;andherlipswereblithewithsong,whichisthenativespeechofgladandinnocenthearts.Heryounghusbandwasashappyasshe;forhewasdoinghiswholeduty,heworkedearlyandlateathishandicraft,hisbreadwashonestbreadwellandfairlyearned,hewasprospering,hewasfurnishingshelterandsustenancetohisfamily,hewasaddinghismitetothewealthofthenation.Byconsentofatreacherouslaw,instantdestructionfelluponthisholyhomeandsweptitaway!Thatyounghusbandwaswaylaidandimpressed,andsenttosea.Thewifeknewnothingofit.Shesoughthimeverywhere,shemovedthehardestheartswiththesupplicationsofhertears,thebrokeneloquenceofherdespair.Weeksdraggedby,shewatching,waiting,hoping,hermindgoingslowlytowreckundertheburdenofhermisery.Littlebylittleallhersmallpossessionswentforfood.Whenshecouldnolongerpayherrent,theyturnedheroutofdoors.Shebegged,whileshehadstrength;
whenshewasstarvingatlast,andhermilkfailing,shestoleapieceoflinenclothofthevalueofafourthpartofacent,thinkingtosellitandsaveherchild.Butshewasseenbytheownerofthecloth.Shewasputinjailandbroughttotrial.Themantestifiedtothefacts.A
pleawasmadeforher,andhersorrowfulstorywastoldinherbehalf.
Shespoke,too,bypermission,andsaidshedidstealthecloth,butthathermindwassodisorderedoflatebytroublethatwhenshewasoverbornewithhungerallacts,criminalorother,swammeaninglessthroughherbrainandsheknewnothingrightly,exceptthatshewassohungry!Foramomentallweretouched,andtherewasdispositiontodealmercifullywithher,seeingthatshewassoyoungandfriendless,andhercasesopiteous,andthelawthatrobbedherofhersupporttoblameasbeingthefirstandonlycauseofhertransgression;buttheprosecutingofficerrepliedthatwhereasthesethingswerealltrue,andmostpitifulaswell,stilltherewasmuchsmalltheftinthesedays,andmistimedmercyherewouldbeadangertoproperty——oh,myGod,istherenopropertyinruinedhomes,andorphanedbabes,andbrokenheartsthatBritishlawholdsprecious!——
andsohemustrequiresentence.
\"Whenthejudgeputonhisblackcap,theownerofthestolenlinenrosetremblingup,hislipquivering,hisfaceasgrayasashes;andwhentheawfulwordscame,hecriedout,\'Oh,poorchild,poorchild,Ididnotknowitwasdeath!\'andfellasatreefalls.Whentheyliftedhimuphisreasonwasgone;beforethesunwasset,hehadtakenhisownlife.
Akindlyman;amanwhoseheartwasright,atbottom;addhismurdertothisthatistobenowdonehere;andchargethembothwheretheybelong——totherulersandthebitterlawsofBritain.Thetimeiscome,mychild;
letmeprayoverthee——notFORthee,dearabusedpoorheartandinnocent,butforthemthatbeguiltyofthyruinanddeath,whoneeditmore.\"
Afterhisprayertheyputthenoosearoundtheyounggirl\'sneck,andtheyhadgreattroubletoadjusttheknotunderherear,becauseshewasdevouringthebabyallthetime,wildlykissingit,andsnatchingittoherfaceandherbreast,anddrenchingitwithtears,andhalfmoaning,halfshriekingallthewhile,andthebabycrowing,andlaughing,andkickingitsfeetwithdelightoverwhatittookforrompandplay.Eventhehangmancouldn\'tstandit,butturnedaway.Whenallwasreadythepriestgentlypulledandtuggedandforcedthechildoutofthemother\'sarms,andsteppedquicklyoutofherreach;butsheclaspedherhands,andmadeawildspringtowardhim,withashriek;buttherope——andtheunder-sheriff——heldhershort.Thenshewentonherkneesandstretchedoutherhandsandcried:
\"Onemorekiss——oh,myGod,onemore,onemore,——itisthedyingthatbegsit!\"
Shegotit;shealmostsmotheredthelittlething.Andwhentheygotitawayagain,shecriedout:
\"Oh,mychild,mydarling,itwilldie!Ithasnohome,ithasnofather,nofriend,nomother——\"
\"Ithasthemall!\"saidthatgoodpriest.\"AllthesewillIbetoittillIdie.\"
Youshouldhaveseenherfacethen!Gratitude?Lord,whatdoyouwantwithwordstoexpressthat?Wordsareonlypaintedfire;alookisthefireitself.Shegavethatlook,andcarrieditawaytothetreasuryofheaven,whereallthingsthataredivinebelong.
AConnecticutYankeeinKingArthur\'sCourt-Chapter36Chapter36-AnEncounterintheDarkLONDON——toaslave——wasasufficientlyinterestingplace.Itwasmerelyagreatbigvillage;andmainlymudandthatch.Thestreetsweremuddy,crooked,unpaved.Thepopulacewasaneverflockinganddriftingswarmofrags,andsplendors,ofnoddingplumesandshiningarmor.Thekinghadapalacethere;hesawtheoutsideofit.Itmadehimsigh;yes,andswearalittle,inapoorjuvenilesixthcenturyway.Wesawknightsandgrandeeswhomweknew,buttheydidn\'tknowusinourragsanddirtandrawweltsandbruises,andwouldn\'thaverecognizedusifwehadhailedthem,norstoppedtoanswer,either,itbeingunlawfultospeakwithslavesonachain.Sandypassedwithintenyardsofmeonamule——huntingforme,Iimagined.Butthethingwhichcleanbrokemyheartwassomethingwhichhappenedinfrontofouroldbarrackinasquare,whilewewereenduringthespectacleofamanbeingboiledtodeathinoilforcounterfeitingpennies.Itwasthesightofanewsboy——andIcouldn\'tgetathim!Still,Ihadonecomfort——herewasproofthatClarencewasstillaliveandbangingaway.Imeanttobewithhimbeforelong;thethoughtwasfullofcheer.
Ihadonelittleglimpseofanotherthing,oneday,whichgavemeagreatuplift.Itwasawirestretchingfromhousetoptohousetop.Telegraphortelephone,sure.IdidverymuchwishIhadalittlepieceofit.ItwasjustwhatIneeded,inordertocarryoutmyprojectofescape.Myideawastogetloosesomenight,alongwiththeking,thengagandbindourmaster,changeclotheswithhim,batterhimintotheaspectofastranger,hitchhimtotheslave-chain,assumepossessionoftheproperty,marchtoCamelot,and——
Butyougetmyidea;youseewhatastunningdramaticsurpriseIwouldwindupwithatthepalace.Itwasallfeasible,ifIcouldonlygetholdofaslenderpieceofironwhichIcouldshapeintoalock-pick.Icouldthenundothelumberingpadlockswithwhichourchainswerefastened,wheneverImightchoose.ButIneverhadanyluck;nosuchthingeverhappenedtofallinmyway.However,mychancecameatlast.Agentlemanwhohadcometwicebeforetodickerforme,withoutresult,orindeedanyapproachtoaresult,cameagain.Iwasfarfromexpectingevertobelongtohim,forthepriceaskedformefromthetimeIwasfirstenslavedwasexorbitant,andalwaysprovokedeitherangerorderision,yetmymasterstuckstubbornlytoit——twenty-twodollars.Hewouldn\'tbateacent.Thekingwasgreatlyadmired,becauseofhisgrandphysique,buthiskinglystylewasagainsthim,andhewasn\'tsalable;nobodywantedthatkindofaslave.Iconsideredmyselfsafefrompartingfromhimbecauseofmyextravagantprice.No,IwasnotexpectingtoeverbelongtothisgentlemanwhomIhavespokenof,buthehadsomethingwhichIexpectedwouldbelongtomeeventually,ifhewouldbutvisitusoftenenough.Itwasasteelthingwithalongpintoit,withwhichhislongclothoutsidegarmentwasfastenedtogetherinfront.Therewerethreeofthem.Hehaddisappointedmetwice,becausehedidnotcomequitecloseenoughtometomakemyprojectentirelysafe;
butthistimeIsucceeded;Icapturedthelowerclaspofthethree,andwhenhemissedithethoughthehadlostitontheway.
Ihadachancetobegladaboutaminute,thenstraightwayachancetobesadagain.Forwhenthepurchasewasabouttofail,asusual,themastersuddenlyspokeupandsaidwhatwouldbewordedthus——inmodernEnglish:
\"I\'lltellyouwhatI\'lldo.I\'mtiredsupportingthesetwofornogood.
Givemetwenty-twodollarsforthisone,andI\'llthrowtheotheronein.\"
Thekingcouldn\'tgethisbreath,hewasinsuchafury.Hebegantochokeandgag,andmeantimethemasterandthegentlemanmovedawaydiscussing.
\"Anyewillkeeptheofferopen——\"
\"\'Tisopentillthemorrowatthishour.\"
\"ThenIwillansweryouatthattime,\"saidthegentleman,anddisappeared,themasterfollowinghim.
Ihadatimeofittocoolthekingdown,butImanagedit.Iwhisperedinhisear,tothiseffect:
\"YourgraceWILLgofornothing,butafteranotherfashion.AndsoshallI.To-nightweshallbothbefree.\"
\"Ah!Howisthat?\"
\"WiththisthingwhichIhavestolen,Iwillunlocktheselocksandcastoffthesechainsto-night.Whenhecomesaboutnine-thirtytoinspectusforthenight,wewillseizehim,gaghim,batterhim,andearlyinthemorningwewillmarchoutofthistown,proprietorsofthiscaravanofslaves.\"
ThatwasasfarasIwent,butthekingwascharmedandsatisfied.Thateveningwewaitedpatientlyforourfellow-slavestogettosleepandsignifyitbytheusualsign,foryoumustnottakemanychancesonthosepoorfellowsifyoucanavoidit.Itisbesttokeepyourownsecrets.Nodoubttheyfidgetedonlyaboutasusual,butitdidn\'tseemsotome.Itseemedtomethattheyweregoingtobeforevergettingdowntotheirregularsnoring.AsthetimedraggedonIgotnervouslyafraidweshouldn\'thaveenoughofitleftforourneeds;soImadeseveralprematureattempts,andmerelydelayedthingsbyit;forIcouldn\'tseemtotouchapadlock,thereinthedark,withoutstartingarattleoutofitwhichinterruptedsomebody\'ssleepandmadehimturnoverandwakesomemoreofthegang.
ButfinallyIdidgetmylastironoff,andwasafreemanoncemore.
Itookagoodbreathofrelief,andreachedfortheking\'sirons.Toolate!
incomesthemaster,withalightinonehandandhisheavywalkingstaffintheother.Isnuggledcloseamongthewallowofsnorers,toconcealasnearlyaspossiblethatIwasnakedofirons;andIkeptasharplookoutandpreparedtospringformymanthemomentheshouldbendoverme.
Buthedidn\'tapproach.Hestopped,gazedabsentlytowardourduskymassaminute,evidentlythinkingaboutsomethingelse;thensetdownhislight,movedmusinglytowardthedoor,andbeforeabodycouldimaginewhathewasgoingtodo,hewasoutofthedoorandhadcloseditbehindhim.
\"Quick!\"saidtheking.\"Fetchhimback!\"
Ofcourse,itwasthethingtodo,andIwasupandoutinamoment.
But,dearme,therewerenolampsinthosedays,anditwasadarknight.
ButIglimpsedadimfigureafewstepsaway.Idartedforit,threwmyselfuponit,andthentherewasastateofthingsandlively!Wefoughtandscuffledandstruggled,anddrewacrowdinnotime.Theytookanimmenseinterestinthefightandencouragedusalltheycould,and,infact,couldn\'thavebeenpleasanterormorecordialifithadbeentheirownfight.Thenatremendousrowbrokeoutbehindus,andasmuchashalfofouraudienceleftus,witharush,toinvestsomesympathyinthat.Lanternsbegantoswinginalldirections;itwasthewatchgatheringfromfarandnear.
Presentlyahalberdfellacrossmyback,asareminder,andIknewwhatitmeant.Iwasincustody.Sowasmyadversary.Weweremarchedofftowardprison,oneoneachsideofthewatchman.Herewasdisaster,herewasafineschemegonetosuddendestruction!ItriedtoimaginewhatwouldhappenwhenthemastershoulddiscoverthatitwasIwhohadbeenfightinghim;
andwhatwouldhappeniftheyjailedustogetherinthegeneralapartmentforbrawlersandpettylaw-breakers,aswasthecustom;andwhatmight——
Justthenmyantagonistturnedhisfacearoundinmydirection,thefreckledlightfromthewatchman\'stinlanternfellonit,and,byGeorge,hewasthewrongman!
AConnecticutYankeeinKingArthur\'sCourt-Chapter37Chapter37-AnAwfulPredicamentSLEEP?Itwasimpossible.Itwouldnaturallyhavebeenimpossibleinthatnoisomecavernofajail,withitsmangycrowdofdrunken,quarrelsome,andsong-singingrapscallions.Butthethingthatmadesleepallthemoreathingnottobedreamedof,wasmyrackingimpatiencetogetoutofthisplaceandfindoutthewholesizeofwhatmighthavehappenedyonderintheslave-quartersinconsequenceofthatintolerablemiscarriageofmine.
Itwasalongnight,butthemorninggotaroundatlast.Imadeafullandfrankexplanationtothecourt.IsaidIwasaslave,thepropertyofthegreatEarlGrip,whohadarrivedjustafterdarkattheTabardinninthevillageontheothersideofthewater,andhadstoppedthereovernight,bycompulsion,hebeingtakendeadlysickwithastrangeandsuddendisorder.Ihadbeenorderedtocrosstothecityinallhasteandbringthebestphysician;Iwasdoingmybest;naturallyIwasrunningwithallmymight;thenightwasdark,Iranagainstthiscommonpersonhere,whoseizedmebythethroatandbegantopummelme,althoughItoldhimmyerrand,andimploredhim,forthesakeofthegreatearlmymaster\'smortalperil——
Thecommonpersoninterruptedandsaiditwasalie;andwasgoingtoexplainhowIrusheduponhimandattackedhimwithoutaword——
\"Silence,sirrah!\"fromthecourt.\"Takehimhenceandgivehimafewstripeswherebytoteachhimhowtotreattheservantofanoblemanafteradifferentfashionanothertime.Go!\"
Thenthecourtbeggedmypardon,andhopedIwouldnotfailtotellhislordshipitwasinnowisethecourt\'sfaultthatthishigh-handedthinghadhappened.IsaidIwouldmakeitallright,andsotookmyleave.
Tookitjustintime,too;hewasstartingtoaskmewhyIdidn\'tfetchoutthesefactsthemomentIwasarrested.IsaidIwouldifIhadthoughtofit——whichwastrue——butthatIwassobatteredbythatmanthatallmywitwasknockedoutofme——andsoforthandsoon,andgotmyselfaway,stillmumbling.Ididn\'twaitforbreakfast.Nograssgrewundermyfeet.Iwassoonattheslavequarters.Empty——everybodygone!Thatis,everybodyexceptonebody——theslave-master\'s.Itlaythereallbatteredtopulp;andallaboutweretheevidencesofaterrificfight.Therewasarudeboardcoffinonacartatthedoor,andworkmen,assistedbythepolice,werethinningaroadthroughthegapingcrowdinorderthattheymightbringitin.
IpickedoutamanhumbleenoughinlifetocondescendtotalkwithonesoshabbyasI,andgothisaccountofthematter.
\"Thereweresixteenslaveshere.Theyroseagainsttheirmasterinthenight,andthouseesthowitended.\"
\"Yes.Howdiditbegin?\"
\"Therewasnowitnessbuttheslaves.Theysaidtheslavethatwasmostvaluablegotfreeofhisbondsandescapedinsomestrangeway——bymagicarts\'twasthought,byreasonthathehadnokey,andthelockswereneitherbrokenorinanywiseinjured.Whenthemasterdiscoveredhisloss,hewasmadwithdespair,andthrewhimselfuponhispeoplewithhisheavystick,whoresistedandbrakehisbackandinotheranddiverswaysdidgivehimhurtsthatbroughthimswiftlytohisend.\"
\"Thisisdreadful.Itwillgohardwiththeslaves,nodoubt,uponthetrial.\"
\"Marry,thetrialisover.\"
\"Over!\"
\"Wouldtheybeaweek,thinkyou——andthemattersosimple?Theywerenotthehalfofaquarterofanhouratit.\"
\"Why,Idon\'tseehowtheycoulddeterminewhichweretheguiltyonesinsoshortatime.\"
\"WHICHones?Indeed,theyconsiderednotparticularsliketothat.Theycondemnedtheminabody.Wityenotthelaw?——whichmensaytheRomansleftbehindthemherewhentheywent——thatifoneslavekillethhismasteralltheslavesofthatmanmustdieforit.\"
\"True.Ihadforgotten.Andwhenwillthesedie?\"
\"Belikewithinafourandtwentyhours;albeitsomesaytheywillwaitapairofdaysmore,ifperadventuretheymayfindthemissingonemeantime.\"
Themissingone!Itmademefeeluncomfortable.
\"Isitlikelytheywillfindhim?\"
\"Beforethedayisspent——yes.Theyseekhimeverywhere.Theystandatthegatesofthetown,withcertainoftheslaveswhowilldiscoverhimtothemifhecometh,andnonecanpassoutbuthewillbefirstexamined.\"
\"Mightoneseetheplacewheretherestareconfined?\"
\"Theoutsideofit——yes.Theinsideofit——butyewillnotwanttoseethat.\"
Itooktheaddressofthatprisonforfuturereferenceandthensaunteredoff.Atthefirstsecond-handclothingshopIcameto,upabackstreet,Igotaroughrigsuitableforacommonseamanwhomightbegoingonacoldvoyage,andboundupmyfacewithaliberalbandage,sayingIhadatoothache.Thisconcealedmyworstbruises.Itwasatransformation.
Inolongerresembledmyformerself.ThenIstruckoutforthatwire,founditandfollowedittoitsden.Itwasalittleroomoverabutcher\'sshop——whichmeantthatbusinesswasn\'tverybriskinthetelegraphicline.Theyoungchapinchargewasdrowsingathistable.Ilockedthedoorandputthevastkeyinmybosom.Thisalarmedtheyoungfellow,andhewasgoingtomakeanoise;butIsaid:
\"Saveyourwind;ifyouopenyourmouthyouaredead,sure.Tackleyourinstrument.Lively,now!CallCamelot.\"
\"Thisdothamazeme!Howshouldsuchasyouknowaughtofsuchmattersas——\"
\"CallCamelot!Iamadesperateman.CallCamelot,orgetawayfromtheinstrumentandIwilldoitmyself.\"
\"What——you?\"
\"Yes——certainly.Stopgabbling.Callthepalace.\"
Hemadethecall.
\"Now,then,callClarence.\"
\"ClarenceWHO?\"
\"NevermindClarencewho.SayyouwantClarence;you\'llgetananswer.\"
Hedidso.Wewaitedfivenerve-strainingminutes——tenminutes——
howlongitdidseem!——andthencameaclickthatwasasfamiliartomeasahumanvoice;forClarencehadbeenmyownpupil.
\"Now,mylad,vacate!TheywouldhaveknownMYtouch,maybe,andsoyourcallwassurest;butI\'mallrightnow.\"
Hevacatedtheplaceandcockedhiseartolisten——butitdidn\'twin.
Iusedacipher.Ididn\'twasteanytimeinsociabilitieswithClarence,butsquaredawayforbusiness,straight-off——thus:
\"Thekingishereandindanger.Wewerecapturedandbroughthereasslaves.Weshouldnotbeabletoproveouridentity——andthefactis,Iamnotinapositiontotry.Sendatelegramforthepalaceherewhichwillcarryconvictionwithit.\"
Hisanswercamestraightback:
\"Theydon\'tknowanythingaboutthetelegraph;theyhaven\'thadanyexperienceyet,thelinetoLondonissonew.Betternotventurethat.
Theymighthangyou.Thinkupsomethingelse.\"
Mighthangus!Littleheknewhowcloselyhewascrowdingthefacts.
Icouldn\'tthinkupanythingforthemoment.Thenanideastruckme,andIstarteditalong:
\"SendfivehundredpickedknightswithLauncelotinthelead;andsendthemonthejump.Letthementerbythesouthwestgate,andlookoutforthemanwithawhiteclotharoundhisrightarm.\"
Theanswerwasprompt:
\"Theyshallstartinhalfanhour.\"
\"Allright,Clarence;nowtellthisladherethatI\'mafriendofyoursandadead-head;andthathemustbediscreetandsaynothingaboutthisvisitofmine.\"
TheinstrumentbegantotalktotheyouthandIhurriedaway.Ifelltociphering.Inhalfanhouritwouldbenineo\'clock.Knightsandhorsesinheavyarmorcouldn\'ttravelveryfast.Thesewouldmakethebesttimetheycould,andnowthatthegroundwasingoodcondition,andnosnowormud,theywouldprobablymakeaseven-milegait;theywouldhavetochangehorsesacoupleoftimes;theywouldarriveaboutsix,oralittleafter;itwouldstillbeplentylightenough;theywouldseethewhiteclothwhichIshouldtiearoundmyrightarm,andIwouldtakecommand.
Wewouldsurroundthatprisonandhavethekingoutinnotime.Itwouldbeshowyandpicturesqueenough,allthingsconsidered,thoughIwouldhavepreferrednoonday,onaccountofthemoretheatricalaspectthethingwouldhave.
Now,then,inordertoincreasethestringstomybow,IthoughtIwouldlookupsomeofthosepeoplewhomIhadformerlyrecognized,andmakemyselfknown.Thatwouldhelpusoutofourscrape,withouttheknights.ButI
mustproceedcautiously,foritwasariskybusiness.Imustgetintosumptuousraiment,anditwouldn\'tdotorunandjumpintoit.No,Imustworkuptoitbydegrees,buyingsuitaftersuitofclothes,inshopswideapart,andgettingalittlefinerarticlewitheachchange,untilIshouldfinallyreachsilkandvelvet,andbereadyformyproject.SoIstarted.
Buttheschemefellthroughlikescat!ThefirstcornerIturned,I
cameplumpupononeofourslaves,snoopingaroundwithawatchman.Icoughedatthemoment,andhegavemeasuddenlookthatbitrightintomymarrow.
Ijudgehethoughthehadheardthatcoughbefore.Iturnedimmediatelyintoashopandworkedalongdownthecounter,pricingthingsandwatchingoutofthecornerofmyeye.Thosepeoplehadstopped,andweretalkingtogetherandlookinginatthedoor.Imadeupmymindtogetoutthebackway,iftherewasabackway,andIaskedtheshopwomanifIcouldstepoutthereandlookfortheescapedslave,whowasbelievedtobeinhidingbacktheresomewhere,andsaidIwasanofficerindisguise,andmypardwasyonderatthedoorwithoneofthemurderersincharge,andwouldshebegoodenoughtostepthereandtellhimheneedn\'twait,buthadbettergoatoncetothefurtherendofthebackalleyandbereadytoheadhimoffwhenIroustedhimout.
Shewasblazingwitheagernesstoseeoneofthosealreadycelebratedmurderers,andshestartedontheerrandatonce.Islippedoutthebackway,lockedthedoorbehindme,putthekeyinmypocketandstartedoff,chucklingtomyselfandcomfortable.
Well,Ihadgoneandspoileditagain,madeanothermistake.Adoubleone,infact.Therewereplentyofwaystogetridofthatofficerbysomesimpleandplausibledevice,butno,Imustpickoutapicturesqueone;
itisthecryingdefectofmycharacter.Andthen,Ihadorderedmyprocedureuponwhattheofficer,beinghuman,wouldNATURALLYdo;whereaswhenyouareleastexpectingit,amanwillnowandthengoanddotheverythingwhichit\'sNOTnaturalforhimtodo.Thenaturalthingfortheofficertodo,inthiscase,wastofollowstraightonmyheels;hewouldfindastoutoakendoor,securelylocked,betweenhimandme;beforehecouldbreakitdown,Ishouldbefarawayandengagedinslippingintoasuccessionofbafflingdisguiseswhichwouldsoongetmeintoasortofraimentwhichwasasurerprotectionfrommeddlinglaw-dogsinBritainthananyamountofmereinnocenceandpurityofcharacter.Butinsteadofdoingthenaturalthing,theofficertookmeatmyword,andfollowedmyinstructions.Andso,asIcametrottingoutofthatculdesac,fullofsatisfactionwithmyowncleverness,heturnedthecornerandIwalkedrightintohishandcuffs.
IfIhadknownitwasaculdesac——however,thereisn\'tanyexcusingablunderlikethat,letitgo.Chargeituptoprofitandloss.
Ofcourse,Iwasindignant,andsworeIhadjustcomeashorefromalongvoyage,andallthatsortofthing——justtosee,youknow,ifitwoulddeceivethatslave.Butitdidn\'t.Heknewme.ThenIreproachedhimforbetrayingme.Hewasmoresurprisedthanhurt.Hestretchedhiseyeswide,andsaid:
\"What,wouldsthavemeletthee,ofallmen,escapeandnothangwithus,whenthou\'rttheveryCAUSEofourhanging?Goto!\"
\"Goto\"wastheirwayofsaying\"Ishouldsmile!\"or\"Ilikethat!\"
Queertalkers,thosepeople.
Well,therewasasortofbastardjusticeinhisviewofthecase,andsoIdroppedthematter.Whenyoucan\'tcureadisasterbyargument,whatistheusetoargue?Itisn\'tmyway.SoIonlysaid:
\"You\'renotgoingtobehanged.Noneofusare.\"
Bothmenlaughed,andtheslavesaid:
\"Yehavenotrankedasafool——before.Youmightbetterkeepyourreputation,seeingthestrainwouldnotbeforlong.\"
\"Itwillstandit,Ireckon.Beforeto-morrowweshallbeoutofprison,andfreetogowherewewill,besides.\"
Thewittyofficerliftedathisleftearwithhisthumb,madearaspingnoiseinhisthroat,andsaid:
\"Outofprison——yes——yesaytrue.Andfreelikewisetogowhereyewill,soyewandernotoutofhisgracetheDevil\'ssultryrealm.\"
Ikeptmytemper,andsaid,indifferently:
\"NowIsupposeyoureallythinkwearegoingtohangwithinadayortwo.\"
\"Ithoughtitnotmanyminutesago,forsothethingwasdecidedandproclaimed.\"
\"Ah,thenyou\'vechangedyourmind,isthatit?\"