第57章
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  Nosoonerhadsheretiredtorestthatnightthanthewindbegantorise,and,afterafewprefatoryblasts,tobeaccompaniedbyrain。Thewindgrewmoreviolent,andasthestormwenton,itwasdifficulttobelievethatnoopaquebody,butonlyaninvisiblecolorlessthing,wastramplingandclimbingovertheroof,makingbranchescreak,springingoutofthetreesuponthechimney,poppingitsheadintotheflue,andshriekingandblasphemingateverycornerofthewalls。Asintheoldstory,theassailantwasaspectrewhichcouldbefeltbutnotseen。Shehadneverbeforebeensostruckwiththedevilryofagustynightinawood,becauseshehadneverbeensoentirelyaloneinspiritasshewasnow。Sheseemedalmosttobeapartfromherself——avacuousduplicateonly。Therecentselfofphysicalanimationandclearintentionswasnotthere。

  Sometimesaboughfromanadjoiningtreewasswayedsolowastosmitetheroofinthemannerofagigantichandsmitingthemouthofanadversary,tobefollowedbyatrickleofrain,asbloodfromthewound。ToallthisweatherGilesmustbemoreorlessexposed;howmuch,shedidnotknow。

  AtlastGracecouldhardlyenduretheideaofsuchahardshipinrelationtohim。Whateverhewassuffering,itwasshewhohadcausedit;hevacatedhishouseonaccountofher。Shewasnotworthsuchself-sacrifice;sheshouldnothaveaccepteditofhim。

  Andthen,asheranxietyincreasedwithincreasingthought,therereturneduponhermindsomeincidentsofherlateintercoursewithhim,whichshehadheededbutlittleatthetime。Thelookofhisface——whathadtherebeenabouthisfacewhichseemeddifferentfromitsappearanceasofyore?Wasitnotthinner,lessrichinhue,lesslikethatofripeautumn’sbrothertowhomshehadformerlycomparedhim?Andhisvoice;shehaddistinctlynoticedachangeintone。Andhisgait;surelyithadbeenfeebler,stiffer,morelikethegaitofawearyman。Thatslightoccasionalnoiseshehadheardintheday,andattributedtosquirrels,itmighthavebeenhiscoughafterall。

  ThusconvictiontookrootinherperturbedmindthatWinterbornewasill,orhadbeenso,andthathehadcarefullyconcealedhisconditionfromherthatshemighthavenoscruplesaboutacceptingahospitalitywhichbythenatureofthecaseexpelledherentertainer。

  “Myown,own,truel——,mydearkindfriend!”shecriedtoherself。“Oh,itshallnotbe——itshallnotbe!”

  Shehastilywrappedherselfup,andobtainedalight,withwhichsheenteredtheadjoiningroom,thecotpossessingonlyonefloor。

  Settingdownthecandleonthetablehere,shewenttothedoorwiththekeyinherhand,andplaceditinthelock。Beforeturningitshepaused,herfingersstillclutchingit;andpressingherotherhandtoherforehead,shefellintoagitatingthought。

  Atattooonthewindow,causedbythetree-droppingsblowingagainstit,broughtherindecisiontoaclose。Sheturnedthekeyandopenedthedoor。

  Thedarknesswasintense,seemingtotouchherpupilslikeasubstance。Sheonlynowbecameawarehowheavytherainfallhadbeenandwas;thedrippingoftheeavessplashedlikeafountain。

  Shestoodlisteningwithpartedlips,andholdingthedoorinonehand,tillhereyes,growingaccustomedtotheobscurity,discernedthewildbrandishingoftheirboughsbytheadjoiningtrees。Atlastshecriedloudlywithaneffort,“Giles!youmaycomein!”

  Therewasnoimmediateanswertohercry,andoverpoweredbyherowntemerity,Graceretreatedquickly,shutthedoor,andstoodlookingonthefloor。Butitwasnotforlong。Sheagainliftedthelatch,andwithfarmoredeterminationthanatfirst。

  “Giles,Giles!”shecried,withthefullstrengthofhervoice,andwithoutanyoftheshamefacednessthathadcharacterizedherfirstcry。“Oh,comein——comein!Whereareyou?Ihavebeenwicked。Ihavethoughttoomuchofmyself!Doyouhear?Idon’twanttokeepyououtanylonger。Icannotbearthatyoushouldsufferso。Gi-i-iles!”

  Areply!Itwasareply!Throughthedarknessandwindavoicereachedher,floatingupontheweatherasthoughapartofit。

  “HereIam——allright。Don’ttroubleaboutme。”

  “Don’tyouwanttocomein?Areyounotill?Idon’tmindwhattheysay,orwhattheythinkanymore。”

  “Iamallright。”herepeated。“Itisnotnecessaryformetocome。Good-night!good-night!”

  Gracesighed,turnedandshutthedoorslowly。Couldshehavebeenmistakenabouthishealth?Perhaps,afterall,shehadperceivedachangeinhimbecauseshehadnotseenhimforsolong。Timesometimesdidhisageingworkinjerks,assheknew。

  Well,shehaddoneallshecould。Hewouldnotcomein。Sheretiredtorestagain。

  ThenextmorningGracewasatthewindowearly。Shefeltdeterminedtoseehimsomehowthatday,andpreparedhisbreakfasteagerly。Eighto’clockstruck,andshehadrememberedthathehadnotcometoarouseherbyaknocking,asusual,herownanxietyhavingcausedhertostir。

  Thebreakfastwassetinitsplacewithout。Buthedidnotarrivetotakeit;andshewaitedon。Nineo’clockarrived,andthebreakfastwascold;andstilltherewasnoGiles。Athrush,thathadbeenrepeatingitselfagooddealonanoppositebushforsometime,cameandtookamorselfromtheplateandboltedit,waited,lookedaround,andtookanother。Atteno’clockshedrewinthetray,andsatdowntoherownsolitarymeal。Hemusthavebeencalledawayonbusinessearly,therainhavingclearedoff。

  Yetshewouldhavelikedtoassureherself,bythoroughlyexploringtheprecinctsofthehut,thathewasnowhereinitsvicinity;butasthedaywascomparativelyfine,thedreadlestsomestraypassengerorwoodmanshouldencounterherinsuchareconnoitreparalyzedherwish。Thesolitudewasfurtheraccentuatedto-daybythestoppingoftheclockforwantofwinding,andthefallintothechimney-cornerofflakesofsootloosenedbytherains。Atnoonsheheardaslightrustlingoutsidethewindow,andfoundthatitwascausedbyaneftwhichhadcreptoutoftheleavestobaskinthelastsun-raysthatwouldbeworthhavingtillthefollowingMay。

  Shecontinuallypeepedoutthroughthelattice,butcouldseelittle。Infrontlaythebrownleavesoflastyear,anduponthemsomeyellowish-greenonesofthisseasonthathadbeenprematurelyblowndownbythegale。Abovestretchedanoldbeech,withvastarmpits,andgreatpocket-holesinitssideswherebrancheshadbeenamputatedinpasttimes;ablackslugwastryingtoclimbit。

  Deadboughswerescatteredaboutlikeichthyosauriinamuseum,andbeyondthemwereperishingwoodbinestemsresemblingoldropes。

  Fromtheotherwindowallshecouldseeweremoretrees,jacketedwithlichenandstockingedwithmoss。Attheirrootswerestemlessyellowfungilikelemonsandapricots,andtallfungiwithmorestemthanstool。Nextweremoretreesclosetogether,wrestlingforexistence,theirbranchesdisfiguredwithwoundsresultingfromtheirmutualrubbingsandblows。Itwasthestrugglebetweentheseneighborsthatshehadheardinthenight。

  Beneaththemweretherottingstumpsofthoseofthegroupthathadbeenvanquishedlongago,risingfromtheirmossysettinglikedecayedteethfromgreengums。Fartheronwereothertuftsofmossinislandsdividedbytheshedleaves——varietyuponvariety,darkgreenandpalegreen;moss-likelittlefir-trees,likeplush,likemalachitestars,likenothingonearthexceptmoss。

  ThestrainuponGrace’smindinvariouswayswassogreatonthisthemostdesolatedayshehadpassedtherethatshefeltitwouldbewell-nighimpossibletospendanotherinsuchcircumstances。

  Theeveningcameatlast;thesun,whenitschinwasontheearth,foundanopeningthroughwhichtopiercetheshade,andstretchedirradiatedgauzesacrossthedampatmosphere,makingthewettrunksshine,andthrowingsplotchesofsuchruddinessontheleavesbeneaththebeechthattheywereturnedtogoryhues。Whennightatlastarrived,andwithitthetimeforhisreturn,shewasnearlybrokendownwithsuspense。

  Thesimpleeveningmeal,partlytea,partlysupper,whichGracehadprepared,stoodwaitinguponthehearth;andyetGilesdidnotcome。Itwasnownearlytwenty-fourhourssinceshehadseenhim。

  Astheroomgrewdarker,andonlythefirelightbrokeagainstthegloomofthewalls,shewasconvincedthatitwouldbebeyondherstayingpowertopassthenightwithouthearingfromhimorfromsomebody。Yeteighto’clockdrewon,andhisformatthewindowdidnotappear。

  Themealremaineduntasted。Suddenlyrisingfrombeforethehearthofsmoulderingembers,whereshehadbeencrouchingwithherhandsclaspedoverherknees,shecrossedtheroom,unlockedthedoor,andlistened。Everybreathofwindhadceasedwiththedeclineofday,buttherainhadresumedthesteadydrippingofthenightbefore。Gracemighthavestoodtherefiveminuteswhenshefanciedsheheardthatoldsound,acough,atnogreatdistance;anditwaspresentlyrepeated。IfitwereWinterborne’s,hemustbenearher;why,then,hadhenotvisitedher?

  AhorridmisgivingthathecouldnotvisithertookpossessionofGrace,andshelookedupanxiouslyforthelantern,whichwashangingaboveherhead。Tolightitandgointhedirectionofthesoundwouldbetheobviouswaytosolvethedreadproblem;buttheconditionsmadeherhesitate,andinamomentacoldsweatpervadedheratfurthersoundsfromthesamequarter。

  Theywerelowmutterings;atfirstlikepersonsinconversation,butgraduallyresolvingthemselvesintovarietiesofonevoice。

  Itwasanendlessmonologue,likethatwesometimeshearfrominanimatenatureindeepsecretplaceswherewaterflows,orwhereivyleavesflapagainststones;butbydegreesshewasconvincedthatthevoicewasWinterborne’s。Yetwhocouldbehislistener,somuteandpatient;forthoughhearguedsorapidlyandpersistently,nobodyreplied。

  AdreadfulenlightenmentspreadthroughthemindofGrace。“Oh。”

  shecried,inheranguish,asshehastilypreparedherselftogoout,“howselfishlycorrectIamalways——too,toocorrect!Cruelproprietyiskillingthedearestheartthateverwomanclaspedtoherown。”

  Whilespeakingthustoherselfshehadlitthelantern,andhasteningoutwithoutfurtherthought,tookthedirectionwhencethemutteringshadproceeded。Thecoursewasmarkedbyalittlepath,whichendedatadistanceofaboutfortyyardsinasmallerectionofhurdles,notmuchlargerthanashockofcorn,suchaswerefrequentinthewoodsandcopseswhenthecuttingseasonwasgoingon。Itwastooslighteventobecalledahovel,andwasnothighenoughtostanduprightin;appearing,inshort,tobeerectedforthetemporaryshelteroffuel。ThesidetowardsGracewasopen,andturningthelightupontheinterior,shebeheldwhatherprescientfearhadpicturedinsnatchesallthewaythither。

  Uponthestrawwithin,Winterbornelayinhisclothes,justasshehadseenhimduringthewholeofherstayhere,exceptthathishatwasoff,andhishairmattedandwild。

  Bothhisclothesandthestrawweresaturatedwithrain。Hisarmswereflungoverhishead;hisfacewasflushedtoanunnaturalcrimson。Hiseyeshadaburningbrightness,andthoughtheymetherown,sheperceivedthathedidnotrecognizeher。

  “Oh,myGiles。”shecried,“whathaveIdonetoyou!”

  Butshestoppednolongereventoreproachherself。Shesawthatthefirstthingtobethoughtofwastogethimindoors。

  HowGraceperformedthatlaborshenevercouldhaveexactlyexplained。Butbydintofclaspingherarmsroundhim,rearinghimintoasittingposture,andstrainingherstrengthtotheuttermost,sheputhimononeofthehurdlesthatwasloosealongside,andtakingtheendofitinbothherhands,draggedhimalongthepathtotheentranceofthehut,and,afterapauseforbreath,inatthedoor-way。

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