\"’But，’Isaid，’youseemed——Ireallycouldnothelpnoticing，itwassopronounced——youseemedtopositivelydislikeher。Indeed，I
gatheredfromyourremarktoafriendthathersocietywasdistinctlydistastefultoyou。’
\"’ToSmith，’hecorrectedme。’Whatjudgewouldthathowlinglittleblackguardbeofawoman’sworth！Thedislikeofsuchamanasthatisatestimonialtohermerit！’
\"’Imaybemistaken，’Isaid；’butshestruckmeasabitcommon。’
\"’Sheisnot，perhaps，whattheworldwouldcallalady，’headmitted；’butthen，mydearMac，myopinionoftheworldisnotsuchastorenderITSopinionofmuchvaluetome。Iandtheworlddifferonmostsubjects，Iamgladtosay。Sheisbeautiful，andsheisgood，andsheismychoice。’
\"’She’sajollyenoughlittlegirl，’Ireplied，’and，Ishouldsay，affectionate；buthaveyouconsidered，Smythe，whethersheisquite—
—whatshallwesay——quiteasintellectualascouldbedesired？’
\"’Really，totellthetruth，Ihavenottroubledmyselfmuchaboutherintellect，’hereplied，withoneofhissneeringsmiles。’I
havenodoubtthattheamountofintellectabsolutelynecessarytotheformationofaBritishhome，Ishallbeabletosupplymyself。
Ihavenodesireforanintellectualwife。Oneiscompelledtomeettiresomepeople，butonedoesnotlivewiththemifonecanavoidit。’
\"’No，’hecontinued，revertingtohismorenaturaltone；’themoreI
thinkofElizabeththemoreclearitbecomestomethatsheistheonewomanintheworldforwhommarriagewithmeispossible。I
perceivethattothesuperficialobservermyselectionmustappearextraordinary。Idonotpretendtoexplainit，oreventounderstandit。Thestudyofmankindisbeyondman。Onlyfoolsattemptit。Maybeitishercontrasttomyselfthatattractsme。
Maybemy，perhaps，toospiritualnaturefeelstheneedofcontactwithhercoarserclaytoperfectitself。Icannottell。Thesethingsmustalwaysremainmysteries。IonlyknowthatIloveher——
that，ifanyrelianceistobeplaceduponinstinct，sheisthematetowhomArtemisisleadingme。’
\"Itwasclearthathewasinlove，andIthereforeceasedtoarguewithhim。’Youkeptupyouracquaintanceshipwithher，then，afteryou’——Iwasgoingtosay’afteryouceasedtobeSmith，’butnotwishingtoagitatehimbymorementionofthatpersonthanIcouldhelp，Isubstituted，’afteryoureturnedtotheAlbany？’
\"’Notexactly，’hereplied；’IlostsightofherafterIleftYarmouth，andIdidnotseeheragainuntilfivedaysago，whenI
cameacrossherinanaeratedbreadshop。Ihadgoneintogetaglassofmilkandabun，andSHEbroughtthemtome。Irecognisedherinamoment。’Hisfacelightedupwithquiteahumansmile。’I
taketeathereeveryafternoonnow，’headded，glancingtowardstheclock，’atfour。’
\"’There’snotmuchneedtoaskHERviewsonthesubject，’Isaid，laughing；’herfeelingstowardsyouwereprettyevident。’
\"’Well，thatisthecuriouspartofit，’hereplied，withareturntohisformerembarrassment；’shedoesnotseemtocareformenowatall。Indeed，shepositivelyrefusesme。Shesays——toputitinthedearchild’sownracylanguage——thatshewouldn’ttakemeonatanyprice。Shesaysitwouldbelikemarryingaclockworkfigurewithoutthekey。She’smorefrankthancomplimentary，butIlikethat。’
\"’Waitaminute，’Isaid；’anideaoccurstome。DoessheknowofyouridentitywithSmith？’
\"’No，’hereplied，alarmed，’Iwouldnothaveherknowitforworlds。OnlyyesterdayshetoldmethatIremindedherofafellowshehadmetatYarmouth，andmyheartwasinmymouth。’
\"’Howdidshelookwhenshetoldyouthat？’Iasked。
\"’Howdidshelook？’herepeated，notunderstandingme。
\"’Whatwasherexpressionatthatmoment？’Isaid——’wasitsevereortender？’
\"’Well，’hereplied，’nowIcometothinkofit，shedidseemtosoftenabitjustthen。’
\"’Mydearboy，’Isaid，’thecaseisasclearasday—light。ShelovesSmith。NogirlwhoadmiredSmithcouldbeattractedbySmythe。Asyourpresentselfyouwillneverwinher。Inafewweeks’time，however，youwillbeSmith。Leavethematteroveruntilthen。ProposetoherasSmith，andshewillacceptyou。
AftermarriageyoucanbreakSmythegentlytoher。’
\"’ByJove！’heexclaimed，startledoutofhiscustomarylethargy，’I
neverthoughtofthat。Thetruthis，whenIaminmyrightsenses，Smithandallhisaffairsseemlikeadreamtome。Anyideaconnectedwithhimwouldneverentermymind。’
\"Heroseandheldouthishand。’IamsogladIcametoseeyou，’
hesaid；’yoursuggestionhasalmostreconciledmetomymiserablefate。Indeed，IquitelookforwardtoamonthofSmith，now。’
\"’I’msopleased，’Ianswered，shakinghandswithhim。’Mindyoucomeandtellmehowyougeton。Anotherman’sloveaffairsarenotusuallyabsorbing，butthereisanelementofinterestaboutyoursthatrendersthecaseexceptional。’
\"Weparted，andIdidnotseehimagainforanothermonth。Then，lateoneevening，theservantknockedatmydoortosaythataMr。
Smithwishedtoseeme。
\"’Smith，Smith，’Irepeated；’whatSmith？didn’thegiveyouacard？’
\"’No，sir，’answeredthegirl；’hedoesn’tlookthesortthatwouldhaveacard。He’snotagentleman，sir；buthesaysyou’llknowhim。’Sheevidentlyregardedthestatementasanaspersionuponmyself。
\"IwasabouttotellhertosayIwasout，whentherecollectionofSmythe’sotherselfflashedintomymind，andIdirectedhertosendhimup。
\"Aminutepassed，andthenheentered。Hewaswearinganewsuitofalouderpattern，ifpossible，thanbefore。Ithinkhemusthavedesignedithimself。Helookedhotandgreasy。Hedidnotoffertoshakehands，butsatdownawkwardlyontheextremeedgeofasmallchair，andgapedabouttheroomasifhehadneverseenitbefore。
\"Hecommunicatedhisshynesstomyself。Icouldnotthinkwhattosay，andwesatforawhileinpainfulsilence。
\"’Well，’Isaid，atlast，plunginghead—foremostintothematter，accordingtothemethodofshypeople，’andhow’s’Liza？’
\"’Oh，SHE’Sallright，’hereplied，keepinghiseyesfixedonhishat。
\"’Haveyoudoneit？’Icontinued。
\"’Donewot？’heasked，lookingup。
\"’Marriedher。’
\"’No，’heanswered，returningtothecontemplationofhishat。
\"’Hassherefusedyouthen？’Isaid。
\"’Iain’tarst’er，’hereturned。
Heseemedunwillingtoexplainmattersofhisownaccord。Ihadtoputtheconversationintotheformofacross—examination。
\"’Whynot？’Iasked；’don’tyouthinkshecaresforyouanylonger？’
Heburstintoaharshlaugh。’Thereain’tmuchfearo’that，’hesaid；’it’slike’avinganAlcock’sporousplastermashedonyer，blowedifitain’t。There’snogettin’ridof’er。Iwishshe’dgiv’somebodyelseaturn。I’mfairsickof’er。’
\"’Butyouwereenthusiasticaboutheramonthago！’Iexclaimedinastonishment。
\"’Smythemay’avebeen，’hesaid；’thereain’tnoaccountingforthatninny，’is’ead’sfullofstarch。Anyhow，Idon’ttake’eronwhileI’mmyself。I’mtoojollyfly。’
\"’Thatsorto’gal’sallrightenoughtolarkwith，’hecontinued；
’butyerdon’twanttomarry’em。Theydon’tdoyernogood。Amanwantsawifeas’ecanrespect——someoneasisacutabove’imself，aswillraise’imupapegortwo——someoneas’ecanlookuptoandworship。Aman’swifeorterbeto’imagawddess——ahangel，a——’
\"’Youappeartohavemetthelady，’Iremarked，interruptinghim。
\"Heblushedscarlet，andbecamesuddenlyabsorbedinthepatternofthecarpet。Butthenextmomenthelookedupagain，andhisfaceseemedliterallytransformed。
\"’Oh！Mr。MacShaughnassy，’heburstout，witharingofgenuinemanlinessinhisvoice，’youdon’tknow’owgood，’owbeautifulsheis。Iain’tfittobreathe’ernameinmythoughts。An’she’ssoclever。Imet’eratthatToynbee’All。Therewasapartyoftoffstherealltogether。Youwould’aveenjoyedit，Mr。MacShaughnassy，ifyoucould’ave’eard’er；shewasmakin’funofthepicturesandthepeopleroundaboutto’erpa——suchwit，suchlearnin’，such’aughtiness。Ifolleredthemoutandopenedthecarriagedoorfor’er，andshejustdrew’erskirtasideandlookedatmeasifIwasthedirtintheroad。IwishIwas，forthenperhapsonedayI’dkiss’erfeet。’
\"HisemotionwassogenuinethatIdidnotfeelinclinedtolaughathim。’Didyoufindoutwhoshewas？’Iasked。
\"’Yes，’heanswered；’I’eardtheoldgentlemansay\"’Ome\"tothecoachman，andIranafterthecarriageallthewayto’ArleyStreet。
Trevior’s’ername，HedithTrevior。’
\"’MissTrevior！’Icried，’atall，darkgirl，withuntidyhairandratherweakeyes？’
\"’Tallanddark，’hereplied’with’airthatseemstryin’toreach’erlipstokiss’em，andheyes，lightblue，likeaCambridgenecktie。A’undredandseventy—threewasthenumber。’
\"’That’sright，’Isaid；’mydearSmith，thisisbecomingcomplicated。You’vemettheladyandtalkedtoherforhalfanhour——asSmythe，don’tyouremember？’
\"’No，’hesaid，aftercogitatingforaminute，’carn’tsayIdo；I
nevercanremembermuchaboutSmythe。Heallersseemstomelikeabaddream。’
\"’Well，youmether，’Isaid；’I’mpositive。Iintroducedyoutohermyself，andsheconfidedtomeafterwardsthatshethoughtyouamostcharmingman。’
\"’No——didshe？’heremarked，evidentlysofteninginhisfeelingstowardsSmythe；’anddidIlike’ER？’
\"’Well，totellthetruth，’Ianswered，’Idon’tthinkyoudid。Youlookedintenselybored。’
\"’TheJuggins，’Iheardhimmuttertohimself，andthenhesaidaloud：’D’yerthinkIshallgetachanceo’seein’’eragen，whenI’m——whenI’mSmythe？’
\"’Ofcourse，’Isaid，’I’lltakeyouroundmyself。Bythebye，’I
added，jumpingupandlookingonthemantelpiece，’I’vegotacardforaCinderellaattheirplace——somethingtodowithabirthday。
WillyoubeSmytheonNovemberthetwentieth？’
\"’Ye——as，’hereplied；’oh，yas——boundtobebythen。’
\"’Verywell，then，’Isaid，’I’llcallroundforyouattheAlbany，andwe’llgotogether。’
\"Heroseandstoodsmoothinghishatwithhissleeve。’FusttimeI’veeverlookedfor’ardtobein’thathanimatedcorpse，Smythe，’hesaidslowly。’BlowedifIdon’ttryto’urryitup——’ponmysiveyI
will。’
\"’He’llbenogoodtoyoutillthetwentieth，’Iremindedhim。
’And，’Iadded，asIstooduptoringthebell，’you’resureit’sagenuinecasethistime。Youwon’tbegoingbackto’Liza？’
\"’Oh，don’ttalk’bout’LizainthesamebreathwithHedith，’hereplied，’itsoundslikesacrilege。’
\"Hestoodhesitatingwiththehandleofthedoorinhishand。Atlast，openingitandlookingveryhardathishat，hesaid，’I’mgoin’to’ArleyStreetnow。Iwalkupanddownoutsidethe’ouseeveryevening，andsometimes，whenthereain’tnoonelookin’，Igetachancetokissthedoorstep。’
\"Hedisappeared，andIreturnedtomychair。
\"OnNovembertwentieth，Icalledforhimaccordingtopromise。I
foundhimonthepointofstartingfortheclub：hehadforgottenallaboutourappointment。Iremindedhimofit，andhewithdifficultyrecalledit，andconsented，withoutanyenthusiasm，toaccompanyme。Byafewartfulhintstohermother（includingacasualmentionofhisincome），ImanoeuvredmatterssothathehadEdithalmostentirelytohimselfforthewholeevening。IwasproudofwhatIhaddone，andaswewerewalkinghometogetherIwaitedtoreceivehisgratitude。
\"Asitseemedslowincoming，Ihintedmyexpectations。
\"’Well，’Isaid，’IthinkImanagedthatverycleverlyforyou。’
\"’Managedwhatverycleverly？’saidhe。
\"’Why，gettingyouandMissTreviorlefttogetherforsuchalongtimeintheconservatory，’Ianswered，somewhathurt；’Ifixedthatforyou。’
\"’Oh，itwasYOU，wasit，’hereplied；’I’vebeencursingProvidence。’
\"Istoppeddeadinthemiddleofthepavement，andfacedhim。
’Don’tyouloveher？’Isaid。
\"’Loveher！’herepeated，intheutmostastonishment；’whatonearthisthereinhertolove？She’snothingbutabadtranslationofamodernFrenchcomedy，withtheinterestomitted。’
\"This’tired’me——touseanAmericanism。’Youcametomeamonthago，’Isaid，’ravingoverher，andtalkingaboutbeingthedirtunderherfeetandkissingherdoorstep。’
\"Heturnedveryred。’Iwish，mydearMac，’hesaid，’youwouldpaymethecomplimentofnotmistakingmeforthatdetestablelittlecadwithwhomIhavethemisfortunetobeconnected。Youwouldgreatlyobligemeifnexttimeheattemptstoinflictuponyouhisvulgardrivelyouwouldkindlykickhimdownstairs。’
\"’Nodoubt，’headded，withasneer，aswewalkedon，’MissTreviorwouldbehisideal。Sheisexactlythetypeofwoman，Ishouldsay，tocharmthattypeofman。Formyself，Idonotappreciatetheartisticandliteraryfemale。’
\"’Besides，’hecontinued，inadeepertone，’youknowmyfeelings。
IshallnevercareforanyotherwomanbutElizabeth。’
\"’Andshe？’Isaid\"’She，’hesighed，’isbreakingherheartforSmith。’
\"’Whydon’tyoutellheryouareSmith？’Iasked。
\"’Icannot，’hereplied，’noteventowinher。Besides，shewouldnotbelieveme。’
\"Wesaidgood—nightatthecornerofBondStreet，andIdidnotseehimagaintilloneafternoonlateinthefollowingMarch，whenIranagainsthiminLudgateCircus。Hewaswearinghistransitionbluesuitandbowlerhat。Iwentuptohimandtookhisarm。
\"’Whichareyou？’Isaid。
\"’Neither，forthemoment，’hereplied，’thankGod。HalfanhouragoIwasSmythe，halfanhourhenceIshallbeSmith。Forthepresenthalf—hourIamaman。’
\"Therewasapleasant，heartyringinhisvoice，andagenial，kindlylightinhiseyes，andheheldhimselflikeafrankgentleman。
\"’Youarecertainlyanimprovementuponbothofthem，’Isaid。
\"Helaughedasunnylaugh，withjusttheshadowofsadnessdashedacrossit。’DoyouknowmyideaofHeaven？’hesaid。
\"’No，’Ireplied，somewhatsurprisedatthequestion。
\"’LudgateCircus，’wastheanswer。’Theonlyreallysatisfyingmomentsofmylife，’hesaid，’havebeenpassedintheneighbourhoodofLudgateCircus。IleavePiccadillyanunhealthy，unwholesomeprig。AtCharingCrossIbegintofeelmybloodstirinmyveins。
FromLudgateCircustoCheapsideIamahumanthingwithhumanfeelingthrobbinginmyheart，andhumanthoughtthrobbinginmybrain——withfancies，sympathies，andhopes。AttheBankmymindbecomesablank。AsIwalkon，mysensesgrowcoarseandblunted；
andbythetimeIreachWhitechapelIamapoorlittleuncivilisedcad。Onthereturnjourneyitisthesamethingreversed。’
\"’WhynotliveinLudgateCircus，’Isaid，’andbealwaysasyouarenow？’
\"’Because，’heanswered，’manisapendulum，andmusttravelhisarc。’
\"’MydearMac，’saidhe，layinghishanduponmyshoulder，’thereisonlyonegoodthingaboutme，andthatisamoral。ManisasGodmadehim：don’tbesosurethatyoucantakehimtopiecesandimprovehim。AllmylifeIhavesoughttomakemyselfanunnaturallysuperiorperson。Naturehasretaliatedbymakingmealsoanunnaturallyinferiorperson。Natureabhorslopsidedness。
Sheturnsoutmanasawhole，tobedevelopedasawhole。Ialwayswonder，wheneverIcomeacrossasupernaturallypious，asupernaturallymoral，asupernaturallyculturedperson，iftheyalsohaveareverseself。’
\"Iwasshockedathissuggestedargument，andwalkedbyhissideforawhilewithoutspeaking。Atlast，feelingcuriousonthesubject，Iaskedhimhowhisvariousloveaffairswereprogressing。
\"’Oh，asusual，’hereplied；’inandoutofaculdesac。WhenIamSmytheIloveEliza，andElizaloathesme。WhenIamSmithIloveEdith，andthemeresightofmemakeshershudder。Itisasunfortunateforthemasforme。Iamnotsayingitboastfully。
Heavenknowsitisanaddeddraughtofmiseryinmycup；butitisafactthatElizaisliterallypiningawayformeasSmith，and——asSmithIfinditimpossibletobeevenciviltoher；whileEdith，poorgirl，hasbeenfoolishenoughtosetherheartonmeasSmythe，andasSmythesheseemstomebuttheskinofawomanstuffedwiththehusksoflearning，andragstornfromthecorpseofwit。’
\"Iremainedabsorbedinmyownthoughtsforsometime，anddidnotcomeoutofthemtillwewerecrossingtheMinories。Then，theideasuddenlyoccurringtome，Isaid：
\"’Whydon’tyougetanewgirlaltogether？TheremustbemediumgirlsthatbothSmithandSmythecouldlike，andthatwouldputupwithbothofyou。’
\"’Nomoregirlsforthischild，’heanswered’they’remoretroublethanthey’reworth。Thoseyerwantyercarn’tget，andthoseyercan’ave，yerdon’twant。’
\"Istarted，andlookedupathim。Hewasslouchingalongwithhishandsinhispockets，andavacuouslookinhisface。
\"Asuddenrepulsionseizedme。’Imustgonow，’Isaid，stopping。
’I’dnoideaIhadcomesofar。’
\"HeseemedasgladtoberidofmeasItoberidofhim。’Oh，mustyer，’hesaid，holdingouthishand。’Well，solong。’
\"Weshookhandscarelessly。Hedisappearedinthecrowd，andthatisthelastIhaveeverseenofhim。\"
\"Isthatatruestory？\"askedJephson。
\"Well，I’vealteredthenamesanddates，\"saidMacShaughnassy；\"butthemainfactsyoucanrelyupon。\"
CHAPTERX
Thefinalquestiondiscussedatourlastmeetingbeen：Whatshallourherobe？MacShaughnassyhadsuggestedanauthor，withacriticforthevillain。Myideawasastockbroker，withanundercurrentofromanceinhisnature。SaidJephson，whohasapracticalmind：
\"Thequestionisnotwhatwelike，butwhatthefemalenovel—readerlikes。\"
\"Thatisso，\"agreedMacShaughnassy。\"Iproposethatwecollectfeminineopinionuponthispoint。Iwillwritetomyauntandobtainfromhertheoldlady’sview。You，\"hesaid，turningtome，\"canputthecasetoyourwife，andgettheyounglady’sideal。LetBrownwritetohissisteratNewnham，andfindoutwhomtheintellectualmaidenfavours，whileJephsoncanlearnfromMissMedburywhatismostattractivetothecommon—sensedgirl。\"
Thisplanwehadadopted，andtheresultwasnowunderconsideration。MacShaughnassyopenedtheproceedingsbyreadinghisaunt’sletter。Wrotetheoldlady：
\"Ithink，ifIwereyou，mydearboy，Ishouldchooseasoldier。
Youknowyourpoorgrandfather，whoranawaytoAmericawiththatWICKEDMrs。Featherly，thebanker’swife，wasasoldier，andsowasyourpoorcousinRobert，wholosteightthousandpoundsatMonteCarlo。Ihavealwaysfeltsingularlydrawntowardssoldiers，evenasagirl；thoughyourpoordearunclecouldnotbearthem。YouwillfindmanyallusionstosoldiersandmenofwarintheOldTestament（seeJer。xlviii。14）。Ofcourseonedoesnotliketothinkoftheirfightingandkillingeachother，butthentheydonotseemtodothatsortofthingnowadays。\"
\"Somuchfortheoldlady，\"saidMacShaughnassy，ashefoldeduptheletterandreturnedittohispocket。\"Whatsaysculture？\"
Brownproducedfromhiscigar—casealetteraddressedinaboldroundhand，andreadasfollows：
\"Whatacuriouscoincidence！AfewofuswerediscussingthisverysubjectlastnightinMillicentHightopper’srooms，andImaytellyouatoncethatourdecisionwasunanimousinfavourofsoldiers。
Yousee，mydearSelkirk，inhumannaturetheattractionistowardstheopposite。Toamilliner’sapprenticeapoetwouldnodoubtbesatisfying；toawomanofintelligencehewouldheanunutterablebore。Whattheintellectualwomanrequiresinmanisnotsomethingtoarguewith，butsomethingtolookat。Toanempty—headedwomanI
canimaginethesoldiertypeprovingvapidanduninteresting；tothewomanofmindherepresentsheridealofman——acreaturestrong，handsome，well—dressed，andnottooclever。\"
\"Thatgivesustwovotesforthearmy，\"remarkedMacShaughnassy，asBrowntorehissister’sletterintwo，andthrewthepiecesintothewaste—paperbasket。\"Whatsaysthecommon—sensedgirl？\"
\"Firstcatchyourcommon—sensedgirl，\"mutteredJephson，alittlegrumpily，asitseemedtome。\"Wheredoyouproposefindingher？\"
\"Well，\"returnedMacShaughnassy，\"IlookedtofindherinMissMedbury。\"
Asarule，thementionofMissMedbury’snamebringsaflushofjoytoJephson’sface；butnowhisfeaturesworeanexpressiondistinctlyapproachingascowl。
\"Oh！\"hereplied，\"didyou？Well，then，thecommon—sensedgirllovesthemilitaryalso。\"
\"ByJove！\"exclaimedMacShaughnassy，\"whatanextraordinarything。
Whatreasondoesshegive？\"
\"Thatthere’sasomethingaboutthem，andthattheydancesodivinely，\"answeredJephson，shortly。
\"Well，youdosurpriseme，\"murmuredMacShaughnassy，\"Iamastonished。\"
Thentomehesaid：\"Andwhatdoestheyoungmarriedwomansay？
Thesame？\"
\"Yes，\"Ireplied，\"preciselythesame。\"
\"DoesSHEgiveareason？\"heasked。
\"Ohyes，\"Iexplained；\"becauseyoucan’thelplikingthem。\"
Therewassilenceforthenextfewminutes，whilewesmokedandthought。Ifancywewereallwishingwehadneverstartedthisinquiry。
Thatfourdistinctlydifferenttypesofeducatedwomanhoodshould，withpromptnessandunanimityquiteunfeminine，haveselectedthesoldierastheirideal，wascertainlydiscouragingtothecivilianheart。Hadtheybeennursemaidsorservantgirls，Ishouldhaveexpectedit。TheworshipofMarsbytheVenusofthewhitecapisoneofthefewvitalreligionslefttothisdevoutlessage。AyearortwoagoIlodgednearabarracks，andthesighttobeseenrounditshugeirongatesonSundayafternoonsIshallneverforget。Thegirlsbegantoassembleabouttwelveo’clock。Bytwo，atwhichhourthearmy，withitshairnicelyoiledandacaneinitshand，wasreadyforastroll，therewouldbesomefourorfivehundredofthemwaitinginaline。Formerlytheyhadcollectedinawildmob，andasthesoldierswereletouttothemtwoatatime，hadfoughtforthem，aslionsforearlyChristians。This，however，hadledtoscenesofsuchdisorderandbrutality，thatthepolicehadbeenobligedtointerfere；andthegirlswerenowmarshalledinQUEUE，twoabreast，andcompelled，byaforceofconstablesspeciallytoldoffforthepurpose，tokeeptheirplacesandwaittheirproperturn。
Atthreeo’clockthesentryondutywouldcomedowntothewicketandcloseit。\"They’reallgone，mydears，\"hewouldshoutouttothegirlsstillleft；\"it’snogoodyourstopping，we’venomoreforyouto—day。\"
\"Oh，notone！\"somepoorchildwouldmurmurpleadingly，whilethetearswelledupintoherbigroundeyes，\"notevenalittleone。
I’vebeenwaitingSUCHalongtime。\"
\"Can’thelpthat，\"thehonestfellowwouldreply，gruffly，butnotunkindly，turningasidetohidehisemotion；\"you’vehad’emallbetweenyou。Wedon’tmake’em，youknow：youcan’thave’emifwehaven’tgot’em，canyou？Comeearliernexttime。\"
Thenhewouldhurryawaytoescapefurtherimportunity；andthepolice，whoappearedtohavebeenwaitingforthismomentwithgloatinganticipation，wouldjeeringlyhustleawaytheweepingremnant。\"Nowthen，passalong，yougirls，passalong，\"theywouldsay，inthatirritatinglyunsympatheticvoiceoftheirs。\"You’vehadyourchance。Can’thavetheroadwayblockedupalltheafternoonwiththis’eredemonstrationoftheunloved。Passalong。\"
Inconnectionwiththissamebarracks，ourchar—womantoldAmenda，whotoldEthelbertha，whotoldmeastory，whichInowtoldtheboys。
Intoacertainhouse，inacertainstreetintheneighbourhood，theremovedonedayacertainfamily。Theirservanthadleftthem——
mostoftheirservantsdidattheendofaweek——andthedayafterthemoving—inanadvertisementforadomesticwasdrawnupandsenttotheChronicle。Itranthus：
WANTED，GENERALSERVANT，insmallfamilyofeleven。Wages，6
pounds；nobeermoney。Mustbeearlyriserandhardworker。
Washingdoneathome。Mustbegoodcook，andnotobjecttowindow—
cleaning。Unitarianpreferred。——Apply，withreferences，toA。B。，etc。
ThatadvertisementwassentoffonWednesdayafternoon。Atseveno’clockonThursdaymorningthewholefamilywereawakenedbycontinuousringingofthestreet—doorbell。Thehusband，lookingoutofwindow，wassurprisedtoseeacrowdofaboutfiftygirlssurroundingthehouse。Heslippedonhisdressing—gownandwentdowntoseewhatwasthematter。Themomentheopenedthedoor，fifteenofthemchargedtumultuouslyintothepassage，sweepinghimcompletelyoffhislegs。Onceinside，thesefifteenfacedround，foughttheotherthirty—fiveorsobackontothedoor—step，andslammedthedoorintheirfaces。Thentheypickedupthemasterofthehouse，andaskedhimpolitelytoconductthemtoA。B。\"
Atfirst，owingtotheclamourofthemoboutside，whowerehammeringatthedoorandshoutingcursesthroughthekeyhole，hecouldunderstandnothing，butatlengththeysucceededinexplainingtohimthattheyweredomesticservantscomeillanswertohiswife’sadvertisement。Themanwentandtoldhiswife，andhiswifesaidshewouldseethem，oneatatime。
Whichoneshouldhaveaudiencefirstwasadelicatequestiontodecide。Theman，onbeingappealedto，saidhewouldprefertoleaveittothem。Theyaccordinglydiscussedthematteramongthemselves。Attheendofaquarterofanhour，thevictor，havingborrowedsomehair—pinsandalooking—glassfromourcharwoman，whohadsleptinthehouse，wentupstairs，whiletheremainingfourteensatdowninthehall，andfannedthemselveswiththeirbonnets。
\"A。B。\"wasagooddealastonishedwhenthefirstapplicantpresentedherself。Shewasatall，genteel—lookinggirl。UptoyesterdayshehadbeenheadhousemaidatLadyStanton’s，andbeforethatshehadbeenunder—cookfortwoyearstotheDuchessofYork。
\"AndwhydidyouleaveLadyStanton？\"asked\"A。B。\"
\"Tocomehere，mum，\"repliedthegirl。Theladywaspuzzled。
\"Andyou’llbesatisfiedwithsixpoundsayear？\"sheasked。
\"Certainly，mum，Ithinkitample。\"
\"Andyoudon’tmindhardwork？\"
\"Iloveit，mum。\"
\"Andyou’reanearlyriser？\"
\"Ohyes，mum，itupsetsmestoppinginbedafterhalf—pastfive。\"
\"Youknowwedothewashingathome？\"
\"Yes，mum。Ithinkitsomuchbettertodoitathome。Thoselaundriesruingoodclothes。They’resocareless。\"
\"AreyouaUnitarian？\"continuedthelady。
\"Notyet，mum，\"repliedthegirl，\"butIshouldliketobeone。\"
Theladytookherreference，andsaidshewouldwrite。
Thenextapplicantofferedtocomeforthreepounds——thoughtsixpoundstoomuch。Sheexpressedherwillingnesstosleepinthebackkitchen：ashakedownunderthesinkwasallshewanted。ShelikewisehadyearningstowardsUnitarianism。
Thethirdgirldidnotrequireanywagesatall——couldnotunderstandwhatservantswantedwithwages——thoughtwagesonlyencouragedaloveoffoolishfinery——thoughtacomfortablehomeinaUnitarianfamilyoughttobesufficientwagesforanygirl。
Thisgirlsaidtherewasonestipulationsheshouldliketomake，andthatwasthatsheshouldbeallowedtopayforallbreakagescausedbyherowncarelessnessorneglect。Sheobjectedtoholidaysandeveningsout；sheheldthattheydistractedagirlfromherwork。
Thefourthcandidateofferedapremiumoffivepoundsfortheplace；
andthen\"A。B。\"begantogetfrightened，andrefusedtoseeanymoreofthegirls，convincedthattheymustbelunaticsfromsomeneighbouringasylumoutforawalk。
Laterintheday，meetingthenext—doorladyonthedoor—step，sherelatedhermorning’sexperiences。
\"Oh，that’snothingextraordinary，\"saidthenext—doorlady；\"noneofusonthissideofthestreetpaywages；andwegetthepickofallthebestservantsinLondon。Why，girlswillcomefromtheotherendofthekingdomtogetintooneofthesehouses。It’sthedreamoftheirlives。Theysaveupforyears，soastobeabletocomeherefornothing。\"
\"What’stheattraction？\"asked\"A。B。，\"moreamazedthanever。
\"Why，don’tyousee，\"explainedthenextdoorlady，\"ourbackwindowsopenuponthebarrackyard。Agirllivinginoneofthesehousesisalwaysclosetosoldiers。Bylookingoutofwindowshecanalwaysseesoldiers；andsometimesasoldierwillnodtoherorevencalluptoher。Theyneverdreamofaskingforwages。They’llworkeighteenhoursaday，andputupwithanythingjusttobeallowedtostop。\"
\"A。B。\"profitedbythisinformation，andengagedthegirlwhoofferedthefivepoundspremium。Shefoundheraperfecttreasureofaservant。Shewasinvariablywillingandrespectful，sleptonasofainthekitchen，andwasalwayscontentedwithaneggforherdinner。
ThetruthofthisstoryIcannotvouchfor。Myself，Icanbelieveit。BrownandMacShaughnassymadenoattempttodoso，whichseemedunfriendly。Jephsonexcusedhimselfonthepleaofaheadache。I
admittherearepointsinitpresentingdifficultiestotheaverageintellect。AsIexplainedatthecommencement，itwastoldtomebyEthelbertha，whohaditfromAmenda，whogotitfromthechar—woman，andexaggerationsmayhavecreptintoit。Thefollowing，however，wereincidentsthatcameundermyownpersonalobservation。TheyaffordedastillstrongerexampleoftheinfluenceexercisedbyTommyAtkinsupontheBritishdomestic，andIthereforethoughtitrighttorelatethem。
\"Theheroineofthem，\"Isaid，\"isourAmenda。Now，youwouldcallheratolerablywell—behaved，orderlyyoungwoman，wouldyounot？\"
\"Sheismyidealofunostentatiousrespectability，\"answeredMacShaughnassy\"Thatwasmyopinionalso，\"Ireplied。\"Youcan，therefore，imaginemyfeelingsonpassingheroneeveningintheFolkestoneHighStreetwithaPanamahatuponherhead（MYPanamahat），andasoldier’sarmroundherwaist。ShewasoneofamobfollowingthebandoftheThirdBerkshireInfantry，thenincampatSandgate。Therewasanecstatic，far—awaylookinhereyes。Shewasdancingratherthanwalking，andwithherlefthandshebeattimetothemusic。
\"Ethelberthawaswithmeatthetime。Westaredaftertheprocessionuntilithadturnedthecorner，andthenwestaredateachother。
\"’Oh，it’simpossible，’saidEthelberthatome。
\"’Butthatwasmyhat，’IsaidtoEthelbertha。
\"ThemomentwereachedhomeEthelberthalookedforAmenda，andI
lookedformyhat。Neitherwastobefound。
\"Nineo’clockstruck，teno’clockstruck。Athalf—pastten，wewentdownandgotourownsupper，andhaditinthekitchen。Ataquarter—pasteleven，Amendareturned。Shewalkedintothekitchenwithoutaword，hungmyhatupbehindthedoor，andcommencedclearingawaythesupperthings。
\"Ethelbertharose，calmbutsevere。
\"’Wherehaveyoubeen，Amenda？’sheinquired。
\"’Gaddinghalfoverthecountywithalotoflowsoldiers，’answeredAmenda，continuingherwork。
\"’Youhadonmyhat，’Iadded。
\"’Yes，sir，’repliedAmenda，stillcontinuingherwork，’itwasthefirstthingthatcametohand。WhatI’mthankfulforisthatitwasn’tmissis’sbestbonnet。’
\"WhetherEthelberthawasmollifiedbytheproperspiritdisplayedinthislastremark，Icannotsay，butIthinkitprobable。Atallevents，itwasinavoicemoreofsorrowthanofangerthatsheresumedherexamination。
\"’Youwerewalkingwithasoldier’sarmaroundyourwaistwhenwepassedyou，Amenda？’sheobservedinterrogatively。
\"’Iknow，mum，’admittedAmenda，’Ifoundittheremyselfwhenthemusicstopped。’
\"Ethelberthalookedherinquiries。Amendafilledasaucepanwithwater，andthenrepliedtothem。
\"’I’madisgracetoadecenthousehold，’shesaid；’nomistresswhorespectedherselfwouldkeepmeamoment。Ioughttobeputonthedoorstepwithmyboxandamonth’swages。’
\"’Butwhydidyoudoitthen？’saidEthelbertha，withnaturalastonishment。
\"’BecauseI’mahelplessninny，mum。Ican’thelpmyself；ifIseesoldiersI’mboundtofollowthem。Itrunsinourfamily。MypoorcousinEmmawasjustsuchanotherfool。Shewasengagedtobemarriedtoaquiet，respectableyoungfellowwithashopofhisown，andthreedaysbeforetheweddingsheranoffwitharegimentofmarinestoChathamandmarriedthecolour—sergeant。That’swhatI
shallendbydoing。I’vebeenallthewaytoSandgatewiththatlotyousawmewith，andI’vekissedfourofthem——thenastywretches。
I’manicesortofgirltobewalkingoutwitharespectablemilkman。’
\"Shewassodeeplydisgustedwithherselfthatitseemedsuperfluousforanybodyelsetobeindignantwithher；andEthelberthachangedhertoneandtriedtocomforther。
\"’Oh，you’llgetoverallthatnonsense，Amenda，’shesaid，laughingly；’youseeyourselfhowsillyitis。YoumusttellMr。
Bowlestokeepyouawayfromsoldiers。’
\"’Ah，Ican’tlookatitinthesamelightwaythatyoudo，mum，’
returnedAmenda，somewhatreprovingly；’agirlthatcan’tseeabitofredmarchingdownthestreetwithoutwantingtorushoutandfollowitain’tfittobeanybody’swife。Why，Ishouldbeleavingtheshopwithnobodyinitabouttwiceaweek，andhe’dhavetogotheroundofallthebarracksinLondon，lookingforme。Ishallsaveupandgetmyselfintoalunaticasylum，that’swhatIshalldo。’
\"Ethelberthabegantogrowquitetroubled。’Butsurelythisissomethingaltogethernew，Amenda，’shesaid；’youmusthaveoftenmetsoldierswhenyou’vebeenoutinLondon？’
\"’Ohyes，oneortwoatatime，walkingaboutanyhow，Icanstandthatallright。It’swhenthere’salotofthemwithabandthatI
losemyhead。’
\"’Youdon’tknowwhatit’slike，mum，’sheadded，noticingEthelbertha’spuzzledexpression；’you’veneverhadit。Ionlyhopeyounevermay。’
\"WekeptacarefulwatchoverAmendaduringtheremainderofourstayatFolkestone，andananxioustimewehadofit。Everydaysomeregimentorotherwouldmarchthroughthetown，andatthefirstsoundofitsmusicAmendawouldbecomerestlessandexcited。
ThePiedPiper’sreedcouldnothavestirredtheHamelinchildrendeeperthandidthoseSandgatebandstheheartofourdomestic。
Fortunately，theygenerallypassedearlyinthemorningwhenwewereindoors，butoneday，returninghometolunch，wehearddistantstrainsdyingawayupontheHytheRoad。Wehurriedin。Ethelbertharandownintothekitchen；itwasempty！——upintoAmenda’sbedroom；
itwasvacant！Wecalled。Therewasnoanswer。
\"’Thatmiserablegirlhasgoneoffagain，’saidEthelbertha。’Whataterriblemisfortuneitisforher。It’squiteadisease。’
\"EthelberthawantedmetogotoSandgatecampandinquireforher。
Iwassorryforthegirlmyself，butthepictureofayoungandinnocent—lookingmanwanderingaboutacomplicatedcamp，inquiringforalostdomestic，presentingitselftomymind，IsaidthatI’drathernot。
Ethelberthathoughtmeheartless，andsaidthatifIwouldnotgoshewouldgoherself。IrepliedthatIthoughtonefemalememberofmyhouseholdwasenoughinthatcampatatime，andrequestedhernotto。Ethelberthaexpressedhersenseofmyinhumanbehaviourbyhaughtilydecliningtoeatanylunch，andIexpressedmysenseofherunreasonablenessbysweepingthewholemealintothegrate，afterwhichEthelberthasuddenlydevelopedexuberantaffectionforthecat（whodidn’twantanybody’slove，butwantedtogetunderthegrateafterthelunch），andIbecamesupernaturallyabsorbedintheday—before—yesterday’snewspaper。
\"Intheafternoon，strollingoutintothegarden，Iheardthefaintcryofafemaleindistress。Ilistenedattentively，andthecrywasrepeated。IthoughtitsoundedlikeAmenda’svoice，butwhereitcamefromIcouldnotconceive。Itdrewnearer，however，asI
approachedthebottomofthegarden，andatlastIlocateditinasmallwoodenshed，usedbytheproprietorofthehouseasadark—
roomfordevelopingphotographs。
\"Thedoorwaslocked。’Isthatyou，Amenda？’Icriedthroughthekeyhole。
\"’Yes，sir，’camebackthemuffledanswer。’Willyoupleaseletmeout？you’llfindthekeyonthegroundnearthedoor。’
\"Idiscovereditonthegrassaboutayardaway，andreleasedher。
’Wholockedyouin？’Iasked。
\"’Idid，sir，’shereplied；’Ilockedmyselfin，andpushedthekeyoutunderthedoor。Ihadtodoit，orIshouldhavegoneoffwiththosebeastlysoldiers。’
\"’IhopeIhaven’tinconveniencedyou，sir，’sheadded，steppingout；’Ileftthelunchalllaid。’\"
Amenda’spassionforsoldierswasheronetributetosentiment。
Towardsallothersofthemalesexshemaintainedanattitudeofcallousunsusceptibility，andherengagementswiththem（whichwerenumerous）wereenteredintoorabandonedongroundssosordidastoseriouslyshockEthelbertha。
Whenshecametousshewasengagedtoaporkbutcher——withamilkmaninreserve。ForAmenda’ssakewedealtwiththeman，butweneverlikedhim，andwelikedhisporkstillless。When，therefore，Amendaannouncedtousthatherengagementwithhimwas\"off，\"andintimatedthatherfeelingswouldinnowaysufferbyourgoingelsewhereforourbacon，wesecretlyrejoiced。
\"Iamconfidentyouhavedoneright，Amenda，\"saidEthelbertha；\"youwouldneverhavebeenhappywiththatman。\"
\"No，mum，Idon’tthinkIevershould，\"repliedAmenda。\"Idon’tseehowanygirlcouldashadn’tthedigestionofanostrich。\"
Ethelberthalookedpuzzled。\"Butwhathasdigestiongottodowithit？\"sheasked。
\"Aprettygooddeal，mum，\"answeredAmenda，\"whenyou’rethinkingofmarryingamanascan’tmakeasausagefittoeat。\"
\"But，surely，\"exclaimedEthelbertha，\"youdon’tmeantosayyou’rebreakingoffthematchbecauseyoudon’tlikehissausages！\"
\"Well，Isupposethat’swhatitcomesto，\"agreedAmenda，unconcernedly。
\"Whatanawfulidea！\"sighedpoorEthelbertha，afteralongpause。
\"Doyouthinkyoueverreallylovedhim？\"
\"Ohyes，\"saidAmenda，\"Ilovedhimrightenough，butit’snogoodlovingamanthatwantsyoutoliveonsausagesthatkeepyouawakeallnight。\"
\"Butdoeshewantyoutoliveonsausages？\"persistedEthelbertha。
\"Oh，hedoesn’tsayanythingaboutit，\"explainedAmenda；\"butyouknowwhatitis，mum，whenyoumarryaporkbutcher；you’reexpectedtoeatwhat’sleftover。That’sthemistakemypoorcousinElizamade。Shemarriedamuffinman。Ofcourse，whathedidn’tselltheyhadtofinishupthemselves。Why，onewinter，whenhehadarunofbadluck，theylivedfortwomonthsonnothingbutmuffins。
Ineversawagirlsochangedinallmylife。Onehastothinkofthesethings，youknow。\"
ButthemostshamefullymercenaryengagementthatIthinkAmendaeverenteredinto，wasonewitha’busconductor。WewerelivinginthenorthofLondonthen，andshehadayoungman，acheesemonger，whokeptashopinLupusStreet，Chelsea。Hecouldnotcomeuptoherbecauseoftheshop，soonceaweeksheusedtogodowntohim。
Onedidnotridetenmilesforapennyinthosedays，andshefoundthefarefromHollowaytoVictoriaandbackaseveretaxuponherpurse。Thesame’busthattookherdownatsixbroughtherbackatten。Duringthefirstjourneythe’busconductorstaredatAmenda；
duringthesecondhetalkedtoher，duringthethirdhegaveheracocoanut，duringthefourthheproposedtoher，andwaspromptlyaccepted。Afterthat，Amendawasenabledtovisithercheesemongerwithoutexpense。
Hewasaquaintcharacterhimself，this’busconductor。IoftenrodewithhimtoFleetStreet。Heknewmequitewell（IsupposeAmendamusthavepointedmeouttohim），andwouldalwaysaskmeafterher——aloud，beforealltheotherpassengers，whichwastrying—
—andgivememessagestotakebacktoher。Wherewomenwereconcernedhehadwhatiscalled\"away\"withhim，andfromtheextentandvarietyofhisfemaleacquaintance，andtheevidenttendernesswithwhichthemajorityofthemregardedhim，IaminclinedtohopethatAmenda’sdesertionofhim（whichhappenedcontemporaneouslywithherjiltingofthecheesemonger）causedhimlessprolongedsufferingthanmightotherwisehavebeenthecase。
HewasamanfromwhomIderivedagooddealofamusementonewayandanother。Thinkingofhimbringsbacktomymindasomewhatoddincident。
Oneafternoon，Ijumpeduponhis’busintheSevenSistersRoad。AnelderlyFrenchmanwastheonlyotheroccupantofthevehicle。\"Youvilnotforgetme，\"theFrenchmanwassayingasIentered，\"IdesireSharingCross。\"
\"Iwon’tforgetyer，\"answeredtheconductor，\"youshall’aveyerSharingCross。Don’tmakeafussaboutit。\"
\"That’sthethirdtime’ee’sarstmenottoforget’im，\"heremarkedtomeinastentorianaside；\"’eedon’tgiv’yermuchchanceofdoin’it，does’ee？\"
AtthecorneroftheHollowayRoadwedrewup，andourconductorbegantoshoutafterthemannerofhisspecies：\"CharingCross——
CharingCross——’ereyerare——Comealong，lady——CharingCross。\"
ThelittleFrenchmanjumpedup，andpreparedtoexit；theconductorpushedhimback。
\"Sitdownanddon’tbesilly，\"hesaid；\"thisain’tCharingCross。\"
TheFrenchmanlookedpuzzled，butcollapsedmeekly。Wepickedupafewpassengers，andproceededonourway。HalfamileuptheLiverpoolRoadaladystoodonthekerbregardingusaswepassedwiththatpatheticminglingofdesireanddistrustwhichistheaveragewoman’sattitudetowardsconveyancesofallkinds。Ourconductorstopped。
\"Whered’yerwanttogoto？\"heaskedherseverely——\"Strand——CharingCross？\"
TheFrenchmandidnothearordidnotunderstandthefirstpartofthespeech，buthecaughtthewords\"CharingCross，\"andbouncedupandoutontothestep。Theconductorcollaredhimashewasgettingoff，andjerkedhimbacksavagely。
\"Carn’tyerkeepstillaminute，\"hecriedindignantly；\"blessedifyoudon’twantlookin’afterlikeabloomin’kid。\"
\"IvonttobeputdownatSharingCross，\"answeredtheFrenchman，humbly。
\"YouvonttobeputdownatSharingCross，\"repeatedtheotherbitterly，asheledhimbacktohisseat。\"IshallputyerdowninthemiddleoftheroadifI’avemuchmoreofyer。YoustoptheretillIcomeandslingyerout。Iain’tlikelytoletyergomuchpastyerSharingCross，Ishallbetoojollygladtogetrido’
yer。\"
ThepoorFrenchmansubsided，andwejoltedon。At\"TheAngel\"we，ofcourse，stopped。\"CharingCross，\"shoutedtheconductor，andupsprangtheFrenchman。
\"Oh，myGawd，\"saidtheconductor，takinghimbytheshouldersandforcinghimdownintothecornerseat，\"wotamItodo？Carn’tsomebodysiton’im？\"
Heheldhimfirmlydownuntilthe’busstarted，andthenreleasedhim。AtthetopofChanceryLanethesamescenetookplace，andthepoorlittleFrenchmanbecameexasperated。
\"HekeepsayingSharingCross，SharingCross，\"heexclaimed，turningtotheotherpassengers；\"anditisNOSharingCross。Heisfool。\"
\"Carn’tyerunderstand，\"retortedtheconductor，equallyindignant；
\"ofcourseIsaySharingCross——ImeanCharingCross，butthatdon’tmeanthatitISCharingCross。Thatmeans——\"andthenperceivingfromtheblanklookontheFrenchman’sfacetheutterimpossibilityofevermakingthemattercleartohim，heturnedtouswithanappealinggesture，andasked：
\"DoesanygentlemanknowtheFrenchfor’bloomin’idiot’？\"
Adayortwoafterwards，Ihappenedtoenterhisomnibusagain。
\"Well，\"Iaskedhim，\"didyougetyourFrenchfriendtoCharingCrossallright？\"
\"No，sir，\"hereplied，\"you’ll’ardlybelieveit，butI’adabitofarowwithapolicemanjustbeforeIgottothecorner，anditput’imcleanouto’my’ead。BlessedifIdidn’trun’imontoVictoria。\"
CHAPTERXI
SaidBrownoneevening，\"Thereisbutonevice，andthatisselfishness。\"
Jephsonwasstandingbeforethefirelightinghispipe。Hepuffedthetobaccointoaglow，threwthematchintotheembers，andthensaid：
\"Andtheseedofallvirtuealso。\"
\"Sitdownandgetonwithyourwork，\"saidMacShaughnassyfromthesofawherehelayatfulllengthwithhisheelsonachair；\"we’rediscussingthenovel。Paradoxesnotadmittedduringbusinesshours。\"
Jephson，however，wasinanargumentativemood。
\"Selfishness，\"hecontinued，\"ismerelyanothernameforWill。
Everydeed，goodorbad，thatwedoispromptedbyselfishness。Wearecharitabletosecureourselvesagoodplaceinthenextworld，tomakeourselvesrespectedinthis，toeaseourowndistressattheknowledgeofsuffering。Onemaniskindbecauseitgiveshimpleasuretobekind，justasanotheriscruelbecausecrueltypleaseshim。Agreatmandoeshisdutybecausetohimthesenseofdutydoneisadeeperdelightthanwouldbethecaseresultingfromavoidanceofduty。Thereligiousmanisreligiousbecausehefindsajoyinreligion；themoralmanmoralbecausewithhisstrongself—
respect，viciousnesswouldmeanwretchedness。Self—sacrificeitselfisonlyasubtleselfishness：wepreferthementalexaltationgainedtherebytothesensualgratificationwhichisthealternativereward。Mancannotbeanythingelsebutselfish。Selfishnessisthelawofalllife。Eachthing，fromthefarthestfixedstartothesmallestinsectcrawlingontheearth，fightingforitselfaccordingtoitsstrength；andbroodingoverall，theEternal，workingforHIMSELF：thatistheuniverse。\"
\"Havesomewhisky，\"saidMacShaughnassy；\"anddon’tbesocomplicatedlymetaphysical。Youmakemyheadache。\"
\"Ifallaction，goodandbad，springfromselfishness，\"repliedBrown，\"thentheremustbegoodselfishnessandbadselfishness：
andyourbadselfishnessismyplainselfishness，withoutanyadjective，sowearebackwherewestarted。Isayselfishness——badselfishness——istherootofallevil，andthereyouareboundtoagreewithme。\"
\"Notalways，\"persistedJephson；\"I’veknownselfishness——
selfishnessaccordingtotheordinarilyacceptedmeaningoftheterm——tobeproductiveofgoodactions。Icangiveyouaninstance，ifyoulike。\"
\"Hasitgotamoral？\"askedMacShaughnassy，drowsily，Jephsonmusedamoment。\"Yes，\"hesaidatlength；\"averypracticalmoral——andoneveryusefultoyoungmen。\"
\"That’sthesortofstorywewant，\"saidtheMacShaughnassy，raisinghimselfintoasittingposition。\"Youlistentothis，Brown。\"
Jephsonseatedhimselfuponachair，inhisfavouriteattitude，withhiselbowsrestingupontheback，andsmokedforawhileinsilence。
\"Therearethreepeopleinthisstory，\"hebegan；\"thewife，thewife’shusband，andtheotherman。Inmostdramasofthistype，itisthewifewhoisthechiefcharacter。Inthiscase，theinterestingpersonistheotherman。