第3章
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  Buthe’sjustthesortofmanwho’scapableofcarryingyouofffarawaysomewhereandthencuttingyourthroatsomedayforyourmoney。\"

  Therewasagoodhalfofthelengthoftheverandahbetweentheirchairs。Icameoutandsatdownfiercelymidwaybetweenthem。

  \"Yes,that’swhatwedowithgirlsinEurope,\"Ibeganinagrimlymatter—of—facttone。IthinkMissJacobuswasdisconcertedbymysuddenappearance。Iturneduponherwithcoldferocity:

  \"Astoobjectionableoldwomen,theyarefirststrangledquietly,thencutupintosmallpiecesandthrownaway,abithereandabitthere。Theyvanish—\"

  IcannotgosofarastosayIhadterrifiedher。Butshewastroubledbymytruculence,themoresobecauseIhadbeenalwaysaddressingherwithapolitenessshedidnotdeserve。Herplump,knittinghandsfellslowlyonherknees。ShesaidnotawordwhileIfixedherwithseveredetermination。ThenasIturnedawayfromheratlast,shelaiddownherworkgentlyand,withnoiselessmovements,retreatedfromtheverandah。Infact,shevanished。

  ButIwasnotthinkingofher。Iwaslookingatthegirl。ItwaswhatIwascomingfordaily;troubled,ashamed,eager;findinginmynearnesstoherauniquesensationwhichIindulgedwithdread,self—contempt,anddeeppleasure,asifitwereasecretviceboundtoendinmyundoing,likethehabitofsomedrugorotherwhichruinsanddegradesitsslave。

  Ilookedherover,fromthetopofherdishevelledhead,downthelovelylineoftheshoulder,followingthecurveofthehip,thedrapedformofthelonglimb,rightdowntoherfineanklebelowatorn,soiledflounce;andasfarasthepointoftheshabby,high—

  heeled,blueslipper,danglingfromherwell—shapedfoot,whichshemovedslightly,withquick,nervousjerks,asifimpatientofmypresence。AndinthescentofthemassedflowersIseemedtobreatheherspecialandinexplicablecharm,theheadyperfumeoftheeverlastinglyirritatedcaptiveofthegarden。

  Ilookedatherroundedchin,theJacobuschin;atthefull,redlipspoutinginthepowdered,sallowface;atthefirmmodellingofthecheek,thegrainsofwhiteinthehairsofthestraightsombreeyebrows;atthelongeyes,anarrowedgleamofliquidwhiteandintensemotionlessblack,withtheirgazesoemptyofthought,andsoabsorbedintheirfixitythatsheseemedtobestaringatherownlonelyimage,insomefar—offmirrorhiddenfrommysightamongstthetrees。

  Andsuddenly,withoutlookingatme,withtheappearanceofapersonspeakingtoherself,sheasked,inthatvoiceslightlyharshyetmellowandalwaysirritated:

  \"Whydoyoukeeponcominghere?\"

  \"WhydoIkeeponcominghere?\"Irepeated,takenbysurprise。I

  couldnothavetoldher。IcouldnoteventellmyselfwithsinceritywhyIwascomingthere。\"What’sthegoodofyouaskingaquestionlikethat?\"

  \"Nothingisanygood,\"sheobservedscornfullytotheemptyair,herchinproppedonherhand,thathandneverextendedtoanyman,thatnoonehadevergrasped—forIhadonlygraspedhershoulderonce—thatgenerous,fine,somewhatmasculinehand。Iknewwellthepeculiarlyefficientshape—broadatthebase,taperingatthefingers—ofthathand,forwhichtherewasnothingintheworldtolayholdof。Ipretendedtobeplayful。

  \"No!Butdoyoureallycaretoknow?\"

  Sheshruggedindolentlyhermagnificentshoulders,fromwhichthedingythinwrapperwasslippingalittle。

  \"Oh—nevermind—nevermind!\"

  Therewassomethingsmoulderingunderthoseairsoflassitude。Sheexasperatedmebytheprovocationofhernonchalance,bysomethingelusiveanddefiantinherveryformwhichIwantedtoseize。I

  saidroughly:

  \"Why?Don’tyouthinkIshouldtellyouthetruth?\"

  Hereyesglidedmywayforasidelonglook,andshemurmured,movingonlyherfull,poutinglips:

  \"Ithinkyouwouldnotdare。\"

  \"DoyouimagineIamafraidofyou?Whatonearth……Well,it’spossible,afterall,thatIdon’tknowexactlywhyIamcominghere。Letussay,withMissJacobus,thatitisfornogood。Youseemtobelievetheoutrageousthingsshesays,ifyoudohavearowwithhernowandthen。\"

  Shesnappedoutviciously:

  \"WhoelseamItobelieve?

  \"Idon’tknow,\"Ihadtoown,seeinghersuddenlyveryhelplessandcondemnedtomoralsolitudebytheverdictofarespectablecommunity。\"Youmightbelieveme,ifyouchose。\"

  Shemadeaslightmovementandaskedmeatonce,withaneffortasifmakinganexperiment:

  \"Whatisthebusinessbetweenyouandpapa?\"

  \"Don’tyouknowthenatureofyourfather’sbusiness?Come!Hesellsprovisionstoships。\"

  Shebecamerigidagaininhercrouchingpose。

  \"Notthat。Whatbringsyouhere—tothishouse?\"

  \"Andsupposeit’syou?Youwouldnotcallthatbusiness?Wouldyou?Andnowletusdropthesubject。It’snouse。Myshipwillbereadyforseathedayafterto—morrow。\"

  Shemurmuredadistinctlyscared\"Sosoon,\"andgettingupquickly,wenttothelittletableandpouredherselfaglassofwater。Shewalkedwithrapidstepsandwithanindolentswayingofherwholeyoungfigureabovethehips;whenshepassednearmeIfeltwithtenfoldforcethecharmofthepeculiar,promisingsensationIhadformedthehabittoseeknearher。Ithoughtwithsuddendismaythatthiswastheendofit;thatafteronemoredayIwouldbenolongerabletocomeintothisverandah,sitonthischair,andtasteperverselytheflavourofcontemptinherindolentposes,drinkintheprovocationofherscornfullooks,andlistentothecurt,insolentremarksutteredinthatharshandseductivevoice。

  Asifmyinnermostnaturehadbeenalteredbytheactionofsomemoralpoison,Ifeltanabjectdreadofgoingtosea。

  Ihadtoexerciseasuddenself—control,asoneputsonabrake,topreventmyselfjumpinguptostrideabout,shout,gesticulate,makeherascene。Whatfor?Whatabout?Ihadnoidea。ItwasjustthereliefofviolencethatIwanted;andIlolledbackinmychair,tryingtokeepmylipsformedinasmile;thathalf—

  indulgent,half—mockingsmilewhichwasmyshieldagainsttheshaftsofhercontemptandtheinsultingsalliesflungatmebytheoldwoman。

  Shedrankthewateratadraught,withtheavidityofragingthirst,andletherselffallonthenearestchair,asifutterlyovercome。Herattitude,likecertaintonesofhervoice,hadinitsomethingmasculine:thekneesapartintheamplewrapper,theclaspedhandshangingbetweenthem,herbodyleaningforward,withdroopinghead。Istaredattheheavyblackcoiloftwistedhair。

  Itwasenormous,crowningthebowedheadwithacrushinganddisdainedglory。Theescapedwispshungstraightdown。AndsuddenlyIperceivedthatthegirlwastremblingfromheadtofoot,asthoughthatglassoficedwaterhadchilledhertothebone。

  \"What’sthematternow?\"Isaid,startled,butinnoverysympatheticmood。

  Sheshookherbowed,overweightedheadandcriedinastifledvoicebutwitharisinginflection:

  \"Goaway!Goaway!Goaway!\"

  Igotupthenandapproachedher,withastrangesortofanxiety。

  Ilookeddownatherround,strongneck,thenstoopedlowenoughtopeepatherface。AndIbegantotremblealittlemyself。

  \"Whatonearthareyougonewildabout,MissDon’tCare?\"

  Sheflungherselfbackwardsviolently,herheadgoingoverthebackofthechair。Andnowitwashersmooth,full,palpitatingthroatthatlayexposedtomybewilderedstare。Hereyeswerenearlyclosed,withonlyahorriblewhitegleamunderthelidsasifsheweredead。

  \"Whathascometoyou?\"Iaskedinawe。\"Whatareyouterrifyingyourselfwith?\"

  Shepulledherselftogether,hereyesopenfrightfullywidenow。

  Thetropicalafternoonwaslengtheningtheshadowsonthehot,wearyearth,theabodeofobscuredesires,ofextravaganthopes,ofunimaginableterrors。

  \"Nevermind!Don’tcare!\"Then,afteragasp,shespokewithsuchfrightfulrapiditythatIcouldhardlymakeouttheamazingwords:

  \"Forifyouweretoshutmeupinanemptyplaceassmoothallroundasthepalmofmyhand,Icouldalwaysstranglemyselfwithmyhair。\"

  Foramoment,doubtingmyears,Iletthisinconceivabledeclarationsinkintome。Itiseverimpossibletoguessatthewildthoughtsthatpassthroughtheheadsofourfellow—creatures。

  Whatmonstrousimaginingsofviolencecouldhavedweltunderthelowforeheadofthatgirlwhohadbeentaughttoregardherfatheras\"capableofanything\"moreinthelightofamisfortunethanthatofadisgrace;as,evidently,somethingtoberesentedandfearedratherthantobeashamedof?Sheseemed,indeed,asunawareofshameasofanythingelseintheworld;butinherignorance,herresentmentandfeartookachildishandviolentshape。

  Ofcourseshespokewithoutknowingthevalueofwords。Whatcouldsheknowofdeath—shewhoknewnothingoflife?Itwasmerelyastheproofofherbeingbesideherselfwithsomeodiousapprehension,thatthisextraordinaryspeechhadmovedme,nottopity,buttoafascinated,horrifiedwonder。Ihadnoideawhatnotionshehadofherdanger。Somesortofabduction。Itwasquitepossiblewiththetalkofthatatrociousoldwoman。Perhapsshethoughtshecouldbecarriedoff,boundhandandfootandevengagged。AtthatsurmiseIfeltasifthedoorofafurnacehadbeenopenedinfrontofme。

  \"Uponmyhonour!\"Icried。\"Youshallendbygoingcrazyifyoulistentothatabominableoldauntofyours—\"

  Istudiedherhaggardexpression,hertremblinglips。Hercheeksevenseemedsunkalittle。ButhowI,theassociateofherdisreputablefather,the\"lowestofthelow\"fromthecriminalEurope,couldmanagetoreassureherIhadnoconception。Shewasexasperating。

  \"Heavensandearth!WhatdoyouthinkIcando?\"

  \"Idon’tknow。\"

  Herchincertainlytrembled。Andshewaslookingatmewithextremeattention。Imadeastepnearertoherchair。

  \"Ishalldonothing。Ipromiseyouthat。Willthatdo?Doyouunderstand?Ishalldonothingwhatever,ofanykind;andthedayafterto—morrowIshallbegone。\"

  WhatelsecouldIhavesaid?Sheseemedtodrinkinmywordswiththethirstyaviditywithwhichshehademptiedtheglassofwater。

  Shewhisperedtremulously,inthattouchingtoneIhadheardoncebeforeonherlips,andwhichthrilledmeagainwiththesameemotion:

  \"Iwouldbelieveyou。Butwhataboutpapa—\"

  \"Hebehanged!\"Myemotionbetrayeditselfbythebrutalityofmytone。\"I’vehadenoughofyourpapa。AreyousostupidastoimaginethatIamfrightenedofhim?Hecan’tmakemedoanything。\"

  Allthatsoundedfeebletomeinthefaceofherignorance。ButI

  mustconcludethatthe\"accentofsincerity\"has,assomepeoplesay,areallyirresistiblepower。Theeffectwasfarbeyondmyhopes,—andevenbeyondmyconception。Towatchthechangeinthegirlwaslikewatchingamiracle—thegradualbutswiftrelaxationofhertenseglance,ofherstiffenedmuscles,ofeveryfibreofherbody。Thatblack,fixedstareintowhichIhadreadatragicmeaningmorethanonce,inwhichIhadfoundasombreseduction,wasperfectlyemptynow,voidofallconsciousnesswhatever,andnotevenawareanylongerofmypresence;ithadbecomealittlesleepy,intheJacobusfashion。

  But,manbeingaperverseanimal,insteadofrejoicingatmycompletesuccess,Ibehelditwithastoundedandindignanteyes。

  Therewassomethingcynicalinthatunconcealedalteration,thetrueJacobusshamelessness。IfeltasthoughIhadbeencheatedinsomerathercomplicateddealintowhichIhadenteredagainstmybetterjudgment。Yes,cheatedwithoutanyregardfor,atleast,theformsofdecency。

  Withaneasy,indolent,andinitsindolencesupple,felinemovement,sherosefromthechair,soprovokinglyignoringmenow,thatforveryrageIheldmygroundwithinlessthanafootofher。

  Leisurelyandtranquil,behavingrightbeforemewiththeeaseofapersonaloneinaroom,sheextendedherbeautifularms,withherhandsclenched,herbodyswaying,herheadthrownbackalittle,revellingcontemptuouslyinasenseofrelief,easingherlimbsinfreedomafterallthesedaysofcrouching,motionlessposeswhenshehadbeensofuriousandsoafraid。

  Allthiswithsupremeindifference,incredible,offensive,exasperating,likeingratitudedoubledwithtreachery。

  Ioughttohavebeenflattered,perhaps,but,onthecontrary,myangergrew;hermovementtopassbymeasifIwereawoodenpostorapieceoffurniture,thatunconcernedmovementbroughtittoahead。

  Iwon’tsayIdidnotknowwhatIwasdoing,but,certainly,coolreflectionhadnothingtodowiththecircumstancethatnextmomentbothmyarmswereroundherwaist。Itwasanimpulsiveaction,asonesnatchesatsomethingfallingorescaping;andithadnohypocriticalgentlenessaboutiteither。Shehadnotimetomakeasound,andthefirstkissIplantedonherclosedlipswasviciousenoughtohavebeenabite。

  Shedidnotresist,andofcourseIdidnotstopatone。Sheletmegoon,notasifshewereinanimate—Ifeltherthere,closeagainstme,young,fullofvigour,oflife,astrongdesirablecreature,butasifshedidnotcareintheleast,intheabsoluteassuranceofhersafety,whatIdidorleftundone。Ourfacesbroughtclosetogetherinthisstormofhaphazardcaresses,herbig,black,wide—openeyeslookedintominewithoutthegirlappearingeitherangryorpleasedormovedinanyway。InthatsteadygazewhichseemedimpersonallytowatchmymadnessIcoulddetectaslightsurprise,perhaps—nothingmore。Ishoweredkissesuponherfaceandtheredidnotseemtobeanyreasonwhythisshouldnotgoonforever。

  Thatthoughtflashedthroughmyhead,andIwasonthepointofdesisting,when,allatonce,shebegantostrugglewithasuddenviolencewhichallbutfreedherinstantly,whichrevivedmyexasperationwithher,indeedafiercedesirenevertolethergoanymore。Itightenedmyembraceintime,gaspingout:\"No—youdon’t!\"asifsheweremymortalenemy。Onherpartnotawordwassaid。Puttingherhandsagainstmychest,shepushedwithallhermightwithoutsucceedingtobreakthecircleofmyarms。Exceptthatsheseemedthoroughlyawakenow,hereyesgavemenocluewhatever。Tomeetherblackstarewaslikelookingintoadeepwell,andIwastotallyunpreparedforherchangeoftactics。

  Insteadoftryingtotearmyhandsapart,sheflungherselfuponmybreastandwithadownward,undulating,serpentinemotion,aquickslidingdive,shegotawayfrommesmoothly。Itwasallveryswift;Isawherpickupthetailofherwrapperandrunforthedoorattheendoftheverandahnotverygracefully。Sheappearedtobelimpingalittle—andthenshevanished;thedoorswungbehindhersonoiselesslythatIcouldnotbelieveitwascompletelyclosed。IhadadistinctsuspicionofherblackeyebeingatthecracktowatchwhatIwoulddo。Icouldnotmakeupmymindwhethertoshakemyfistinthatdirectionorblowakiss。

  CHAPTERVI

  Eitherwouldhavebeenperfectlyconsistentwithmyfeelings。I

  gazedatthedoor,hesitating,butintheendIdidneither。Themonitionofsomesixthsense—thesenseofguilt,maybe,thatsensewhichalwaysactstoolate,alas!—warnedmetolookround;

  andatonceIbecameawarethattheconclusionofthistumultuousepisodewaslikelytobeamatteroflivelyanxiety。Jacobuswasstandinginthedoorwayofthedining—room。Howlonghehadbeenthereitwasimpossibletoguess;andrememberingmystrugglewiththegirlIthoughthemusthavebeenitsmutewitnessfrombeginningtoend。Butthissuppositionseemedalmostincredible。

  Perhapsthatimpenetrablegirlhadheardhimcomeinandhadgotawayintime。

  Hesteppedontotheverandahinhisusualmanner,heavy—eyed,withgluedlips。Imarvelledatthegirl’sresemblancetothisman。

  Thoselong,Egyptianeyes,thatlowforeheadofastupidgoddess,shehadfoundinthesawdustofthecircus;butalltherestoftheface,thedesignandthemodelling,theroundedchin,theverylips—allthatwasJacobus,fineddown,morefinished,moreexpressive。

  Histhickhandfellonandgraspedwithforcethebackofalightchair(therewereseveralstandingabout)andIperceivedthechanceofabrokenheadattheendofallthis—mostlikely。Mymortificationwasextreme。Thescandalwouldbehorrible;thatwasunavoidable。ButhowtoactsoastosatisfymyselfIdidnotknow。Istoodonmyguardandatanyratefacedhim。Therewasnothingelseforit。OfonethingIwascertain,that,howeverbrazenmyattitude,itcouldneverequalthecharacteristicJacobusimpudence。

  Hegavemehismelancholy,gluedsmileandsatdown。IownIwasrelieved。Theperspectiveofpassingfromkissestoblowshadnothingparticularlyattractiveinit。Perhaps—perhapshehadseennothing?Hebehavedasusual,buthehadneverbeforefoundmealoneontheverandah。Ifhehadalludedtoit,ifhehadasked:\"Where’sAlice?\"orsomethingofthesort,Iwouldhavebeenabletojudgefromthetone。Hewouldgivemenoopportunity。

  Thestrikingpeculiaritywasthathehadneverlookedupatmeyet。

  \"Heknows,\"Isaidtomyselfconfidently。Andmycontemptforhimrelievedmydisgustwithmyself。

  \"Youareearlyhome,\"Iremarked。

  \"Thingsareveryquiet;nothingdoingatthestoreto—day,\"heexplainedwithacast—downair。

  \"Oh,well,youknow,Iamoff,\"Isaid,feelingthatthis,perhaps,wasthebestthingtodo。

  \"Yes,\"hebreathedout。\"Dayafterto—morrow。\"

  ThiswasnotwhatIhadmeant;butashegazedpersistentlyonthefloor,Ifollowedthedirectionofhisglance。Intheabsolutestillnessofthehousewestaredatthehigh—heeledslipperthegirlhadlostinherflight。Westared。Itlayoverturned。

  Afterwhatseemedaverylongtimetome,Jacobushitchedhischairforward,stoopedwithextendedarmandpickeditup。Itlookedaslenderthinginhisbig,thickhands。Itwasnotreallyaslipper,butalowshoeofblue,glazedkid,rubbedandshabby。Ithadstrapstogoovertheinstep,butthegirlonlythrustherfeetin,afterherslovenlymanner。Jacobusraisedhiseyesfromtheshoetolookatme。

  \"Sitdown,Captain,\"hesaidatlast,inhissubduedtone。

  Asifthesightofthatshoehadrenewedthespell,Igaveupsuddenlytheideaofleavingthehousethereandthen。Ithadbecomeimpossible。Isatdown,keepingmyeyesonthefascinatingobject。Jacobusturnedhisdaughter’sshoeoverandoverinhiscushionedpawsasifstudyingthewaythethingwasmade。Hecontemplatedthethinsoleforatime;thenglancinginsidewithanabsorbedair:

  \"IamgladIfoundyouhere,Captain。\"

  Iansweredthisbysomesortofgrunt,watchinghimcovertly。ThenIadded:\"Youwon’thavemuchmoreofmenow。\"

  Hewasstilldeepintheinteriorofthatshoeonwhichmyeyestoowereresting。

  \"HaveyouthoughtanymoreofthisdealinpotatoesIspoketoyouabouttheotherday?\"

  \"No,Ihaven’t,\"Iansweredcurtly。Hecheckedmymovementtorisebyanaustere,commandinggestureofthehandholdingthatfatalshoe。Iremainedseatedandglaredathim。\"YouknowIdon’ttrade。\"

  \"Yououghtto,Captain。Yououghtto。\"

  Ireflected。IfIleftthathousenowIwouldneverseethegirlagain。AndIfeltImustseeheroncemore,ifonlyforaninstant。Itwasaneed,nottobereasonedwith,nottobedisregarded。No,Ididnotwanttogoaway。Iwantedtostayforonemoreexperienceofthatstrangeprovokingsensationandofindefinitedesire,thehabitofwhichhadmademe—meofallpeople!—dreadtheprospectofgoingtosea。

  \"Mr。Jacobus,\"Ipronouncedslowly。\"Doyoureallythinkthatuponthewholeandtakingvarious’mattersintoconsideration—Imeaneverything,doyouunderstand?—itwouldbeagoodthingformetotrade,letussay,withyou?\"

  Iwaitedforawhile。Hewentonlookingattheshoewhichheheldnowcrushedinthemiddle,thewornpointofthetoeandthehighheelprotrudingoneachsideofhisheavyfist。

  \"Thatwillbeallright,\"hesaid,facingmesquarelyatlast。

  \"Areyousure?\"

  \"You’llfinditquitecorrect,Captain。\"Hehadutteredhishabitualphrasesinhisusualplacid,breath—savingvoiceandstoodmyhard,inquisitivestaresleepilywithoutasmuchasawink。

  \"Thenletustrade,\"Isaid,turningmyshouldertohim。\"Iseeyouarebentonit。\"

  Ididnotwantanopenscandal,butIthoughtthatoutwarddecencymaybeboughttoodearlyattimes。IincludedJacobus,myself,thewholepopulationoftheisland,inthesamecontemptuousdisgustasthoughwehadbeenpartnersinanignobletransaction。Andtherememberedvisionatsea,diaphanousandblue,ofthePearloftheOceanatsixtymilesoff;theunsubstantial,clearmarvelofitasifevokedbytheartofabeautifulandpuremagic,turnedintoathingofhorrorstoo。Wasthisthefortunethisvaporousandrareapparitionhadheldformeinitshardheart,hiddenwithintheshapeasoffairdreamsandmist?Wasthismyluck?

  \"Ithink\"—Jacobusbecamesuddenlyaudibleafterwhatseemedthesilenceofvilemeditation—\"thatyoumightconvenientlytakesomethirtytons。Thatwouldbeaboutthelot,Captain。\"

  \"Wouldit?Thelot!Idaresayitwouldbeconvenient,butI

  haven’tgotenoughmoneyforthat。\"

  Ihadneverseenhimsoanimated。

  \"No!\"heexclaimedwithwhatItookfortheaccentofgrimmenace。

  \"That’sapity。\"Hepaused,then,unrelenting:\"Howmuchmoneyhaveyougot,Captain?\"heinquiredwithawfuldirectness。

  Itwasmyturntofacehimsquarely。IdidsoandmentionedtheamountIcoulddisposeof。AndIperceivedthathewasdisappointed。Hethoughtitover,hiscalculatinggazelostinmine,forquitealongtimebeforehecameoutinathoughtfultonewiththerapacioussuggestion:

  \"Youcoulddrawsomemorefromyourcharterers。Thatwouldbequiteeasy,Captain。\"

  \"No,Icouldn’t,\"Iretortedbrusquely。\"I’vedrawnmysalaryuptodate,andbesides,theship’saccountsareclosed。\"

  Iwasgrowingfurious。Ipursued:\"AndI’lltellyouwhat:ifI

  coulddoitIwouldn’t。\"Thenthrowingoffallrestraint,Iadded:

  \"YouareabittoomuchofaJacobus,Mr。Jacobus。\"

  Thetonealonewasinsultingenough,butheremainedtranquil,onlyalittlepuzzled,tillsomethingseemedtodawnuponhim;buttheunwontedlightinhiseyesdiedoutinstantly。AsaJacobusonhisnativeheath,whatamereskipperchosetosaycouldnottouchhim,outcastashewas。Asaship—chandlerhecouldstandanything。

  AllIcaughtofhismumblewasavague—\"quitecorrect,\"thanwhichnothingcouldhavebeenmoreegregiouslyfalseatbottom—tomyview,atleast。ButIremembered—Ihadneverforgotten—thatImustseethegirl。Ididnotmeantogo。ImeanttostayinthehousetillIhadseenheroncemore。

  \"Lookhere!\"Isaidfinally。\"I’lltellyouwhatI’lldo。I’lltakeasmanyofyourconfoundedpotatoesasmymoneywillbuy,onconditionthatyougooffatoncedowntothewharftoseethemloadedinthelighterandsentalongsidetheshipstraightaway。

  Taketheinvoiceandasignedreceiptwithyou。Here’sthekeyofmydesk。GiveittoBurns。Hewillpayyou。

  HegotupfromhischairbeforeIhadfinishedspeaking,butherefusedtotakethekey。Burnswouldneverdoit。Hewouldn’tliketoaskhimeven。

  \"Well,then,\"Isaid,eyeinghimslightingly,\"there’snothingforit,Mr。Jacobus,butyoumustwaitonboardtillIcomeofftosettlewithyou。\"

  \"Thatwillbeallright,Captain。Iwillgoatonce。\"

  Heseemedatalosswhattodowiththegirl’sshoehewasstillholdinginhisfist。Finally,lookingdullyatme,heputitdownonthechairfromwhichhehadrisen。

  \"Andyou,Captain?Won’tyoucomealong,too,justtosee—\"

  \"Don’tbotheraboutme。I’lltakecareofmyself。\"

  Heremainedperplexedforamoment,asiftryingtounderstand;andthenhisweighty:\"Certainly,certainly,Captain,\"seemedtobetheoutcomeofsomesuddenthought。Hisbigchestheaved。Wasitasigh?Ashewentouttohurryoffthosepotatoesheneverlookedbackatme。

  Iwaitedtillthenoiseofhisfootstepshaddiedoutofthedining—room,andIwaitedalittlelonger。ThenturningtowardsthedistantdoorIraisedmyvoicealongtheverandah:

  \"Alice!\"

  Nothingansweredme,notevenastirbehindthedoor。Jacobus’shousemighthavebeenmadeemptyformetomakemyselfathomein。

  Ididnotcallagain。Ihadbecomeawareofagreatdiscouragement。Iwasmentallyjaded,morallydejected。Iturnedtothegardenagain,sittingdownwithmyelbowsspreadonthelowbalustrade,andtookmyheadinmyhands。

  Theeveningcloseduponme。Theshadowslengthened,deepened,mingledtogetherintoapooloftwilightinwhichtheflower—bedsglowedlikecolouredembers;whiffsofheavyscentcametomeasiftheduskofthishemispherewerebutthedimnessofatempleandthegardenanenormouscenserswingingbeforethealtarofthestars。Thecoloursoftheblossomsdeepened,losingtheirglowonebyone。

  Thegirl,whenIturnedmyheadataslightnoise,appearedtomeverytallandslender,advancingwithaswayinglimp,afloatingandunevenmotionwhichendedinthesinkingofhershadowyformintothedeeplowchair。AndIdon’tknowwhyorwhenceIreceivedtheimpressionthatshehadcometoolate。Sheoughttohaveappearedatmycall。Sheoughttohave……Itwasasifasupremeopportunityhadbeenmissed。

  Iroseandtookaseatclosetoher,nearlyoppositeherarm—chair。

  Hereverdiscontentedvoiceaddressedmeatonce,contemptuously:

  \"Youarestillhere。\"

  Ipitchedminelow。

  \"Youhavecomeoutatlast。\"

  \"Icametolookformyshoe—beforetheybringinthelights。\"

  Itwasherharsh,enticingwhisper,subdued,notverysteady,butitslowtremulousnessgavemenothrillnow。Icouldonlymakeouttheovalofherface,heruncoveredthroat,thelong,whitegleamofhereyes。Shewasmysteriousenough。Herhandswererestingonthearmsofthechair。Butwherewasthemysteriousandprovokingsensationwhichwasliketheperfumeofherflower—likeyouth?I

  saidquietly:

  \"Ihavegotyourshoehere。\"ShemadenosoundandIcontinued:

  \"YouhadbettergivemeyourfootandIwillputitonforyou。\"

  Shemadenomovement。Ibentlowdownandgropedforherfootundertheflouncesofthewrapper。ShedidnotwithdrawitandI

  putontheshoe,buttoningtheinstep—strap。Itwasaninanimatefoot。Ilowereditgentlytothefloor。

  \"Ifyoubuttonedthestrapyouwouldnotbelosingyourshoe,MissDon’tCare,\"Isaid,tryingtobeplayfulwithoutconviction。I

  feltmorelikewailingoverthelostillusionofvaguedesire,overthesuddenconvictionthatIwouldneverfindagainnearherthestrange,half—evil,half—tendersensationwhichhadgivenitsacridflavourtosomanydays,whichhadmadeherappeartragicandpromising,pitifulandprovoking。Thatwasallover。

  \"Yourfatherpickeditup,\"Isaid,thinkingshemayjustaswellbetoldofthefact。

  \"Iamnotafraidofpapa—byhimself,\"shedeclaredscornfully。

  \"Oh!It’sonlyinconjunctionwithhisdisreputableassociates,strangers,the’riff—raffofEurope’asyourcharmingauntorgreat—auntsays—menlikeme,forinstance—thatyou—\"

  \"Iamnotafraidofyou,\"shesnappedout。

  \"That’sbecauseyoudon’tknowthatIamnowdoingbusinesswithyourfather。Yes,Iaminfactdoingexactlywhathewantsmetodo。I’vebrokenmypromisetoyou。That’sthesortofmanIam。

  Andnow—aren’tyouafraid?Ifyoubelievewhatthatdear,kind,truthfuloldladysaysyououghttobe。\"

  Itwaswithunexpectedmodulatedsoftnessthattheaffirmed:

  \"No。Iamnotafraid。\"Shehesitated……\"Notnow。\"

  \"Quiteright。Youneedn’tbe。IshallnotseeyouagainbeforeI

  gotosea。\"Iroseandstoodnearherchair。\"ButIshalloftenthinkofyouinthisoldgarden,passingunderthetreesoverthere,walkingbetweenthesegorgeousflower—beds。Youmustlovethisgarden—\"

  \"Ilovenothing。\"

  IheardinhersullentonethefaintechoofthatresentfullytragicnotewhichIhadfoundoncesoprovoking。ButitleftmeunmovedexceptforasuddenandwearyconvictionoftheemptinessofallthingsunderHeaven。

  \"Good—bye,Alice,\"Isaid。

  Shedidnotanswer,shedidnotmove。Tomerelytakeherhand,shakeit,andgoawayseemedimpossible,almostimproper。I

  stoopedwithouthasteandpressedmylipstohersmoothforehead。

  ThiswasthemomentwhenIrealisedclearlywithasortofterrormycompletedetachmentfromthatunfortunatecreature。AndasI

  lingeredinthatcruelself—knowledgeIfeltthelighttouchofherarmsfallinglanguidlyonmyneckandreceivedahasty,awkward,haphazardkisswhichmissedmylips。No!Shewasnotafraid;butIwasnolongermoved。Herarmsslippedoffmyneckslowly,shemadenosound,thedeepwickerarm—chaircreakedslightly;onlyasenseofmydignitypreventedmefleeingheadlongfromthatcatastrophicrevelation。

  Itraversedthedining—roomslowly。Ithought:She’slisteningtomyfootsteps;shecan’thelpit;she’llhearmeopenandshutthatdoor。AndIcloseditasgentlybehindmeasifIhadbeenathiefretreatingwithhisill—gottenbooty。DuringthatstealthyactI

  experiencedthelasttouchofemotioninthathouse,atthethoughtofthegirlIhadleftsittingthereintheobscurity,withherheavyhairandemptyeyesasblackasthenightitself,staringintothewalledgarden,silent,warm,odorouswiththeperfumeofimprisonedflowers,which,likeherself,werelosttosightinaworldburiedindarkness。

  Thenarrow,ill—lighted,rusticstreetsIknewsowellonmywaytotheharbourwereextremelyquiet。Ifeltinmyheartthatthefurtheroneventuresthebetteroneunderstandshoweverythinginourlifeiscommon,short,andempty;thatitisinseekingtheunknowninoursensationsthatwediscoverhowmediocreareourattemptsandhowsoondefeated!Jacobus’sboatmanwaswaitingatthestepswithanunusualairofreadiness。Heputmealongsidetheship,butdidnotgivemehisconfidential\"Good—evening,sah,\"

  and,insteadofshovingoffatonce,remainedholdingbytheladder。

  Iwasathousandmilesfromcommercialaffairs,whenonthedarkquarter—deckMr。Burnspositivelyrushedatme,stammeringwithexcitement。Hehadbeenpacingthedeckdistractedlyforhoursawaitingmyarrival。Justbeforesunsetalighterloadedwithpotatoeshadcomealongsidewiththatfatship—chandlerhimselfsittingonthepileofsacks。Hewasnowstuckimmovableinthecabin。Whatwasthemeaningofitall?SurelyIdidnot—

  \"Yes,Mr。Burns,Idid,\"Icuthimshort。HewasbeginningtomakegesturesofdespairwhenIstoppedthat,too,bygivinghimthekeyofmydeskanddesiringhim,inatonewhichadmittedofnoargument,togobelowatonce,payMr。Jacobus’sbill,andsendhimoutoftheship。

  \"Idon’twanttoseehim,\"Iconfessedfrankly,climbingthepoop—

  ladder。Ifeltextremelytired。Droppingontheseatoftheskylight,Igavemyselfuptoidlegazingatthelightsaboutthequayandattheblackmassofthemountainonthesouthsideoftheharbour。IneverheardJacobusleavetheshipwitheverysinglesovereignofmyreadycashinhispocket。Ineverheardanythingtill,alongtimeafterwards,Mr。Burns,unabletocontainhimselfanylonger,intrudeduponmewithhisridiculouslyangrylamentationsatmyweaknessandgoodnature。

  \"Ofcourse,there’splentyofroomintheafter—hatch。Buttheyaresuretogorottendownthere。Well!Ineverheard……

  seventeentons!IsupposeImusthoistinthatlotfirstthingto—

  morrowmorning。\"

  \"Isupposeyoumust。Unlessyoudropthemoverboard。ButI’mafraidyoucan’tdothat。Iwouldn’tmindmyself,butit’sforbiddentothrowrubbishintotheharbour,youknow。\"

  \"Thatisthetruestwordyouhavesaidformanyaday,sir—

  rubbish。That’sjustwhatIexpecttheyare。Nearlyeightygoodgoldsovereignsgone;aperfectlycleansweepofyourdrawer,sir。

  BlessmeifIunderstand!\"

  AsitwasimpossibletothrowtherightlightonthiscommercialtransactionIlefthimtohislamentationsandundertheimpressionthatIwasahopelessfool。NextdayIdidnotgoashore。Foronething,Ihadnomoneytogoashorewith—no,notenoughtobuyacigarette。Jacobushadmadeacleansweep。Butthatwasnottheonlyreason。ThePearloftheOceanhadinafewshorthoursgrownodioustome。AndIdidnotwanttomeetanyone。Myreputationhadsuffered。IknewIwastheobjectofunkindandsarcasticcomments。

  Thefollowingmorningatsunrise,justasourstern—fastshadbeenletgoandthetugpluckedusoutfrombetweenthebuoys,IsawJacobusstandingupinhisboat。Theniggerwaspullinghard;

  severalbasketsofprovisionsforshipswerestowedbetweenthethwarts。ThefatherofAlicewasgoinghismorninground。Hiscountenancewastranquilandfriendly。Heraisedhisarmandshoutedsomethingwithgreatheartiness。Buthisvoicewasofthesortthatdoesn’tcarryanydistance;allIcouldcatchfaintly,orratherguessat,werethewords\"nexttime\"and\"quitecorrect。\"

  AnditwasonlyoftheselastthatIwascertain。Raisingmyarmperfunctorilyforallresponse,Iturnedaway。Iratherresentedthefamiliarityofthething。Hadn’tIsettledaccountsfinallywithhimbymeansofthatpotatobargain?

  Thisbeingaharbourstoryitisnotmypurposetospeakofourpassage。Iwasgladenoughtobeatsea,butnotwiththegladnessofolddays。FormerlyIhadnomemoriestotakeawaywithme。I

  sharedintheblessedforgetfulnessofsailors,thatforgetfulnessnaturalandinvincible,whichresemblesinnocenceinsofarthatitpreventsself—examination。NowhoweverIrememberedthegirl。

  DuringthefirstfewdaysIwasforeverquestioningmyselfastothenatureoffactsandsensationsconnectedwithherpersonandwithmyconduct。

  AndImustsayalsothatMr。Burns’intolerablefussingwiththosepotatoeswasnotcalculatedtomakemeforgetthepartwhichIhadplayed。Helookeduponitasapurelycommercialtransactionofaparticularlyfoolishkind,andhisdevotion—ifitwasdevotionandnotmerecussednessasIcametoregarditbeforelong—

  inspiredhimwithazealtominimisemylossasmuchaspossible。

  Oh,yes!Hetookcareofthoseinfamouspotatoeswithavengeance,asthesayinggoes。

  Everlastingly,therewasatackleovertheafter—hatchandeverlastinglythewatchondeckwerepullingup,spreadingout,pickingover,rebagging,andloweringdownagain,somepartofthatlotofpotatoes。Mybargainwithallitsremotestassociations,mentalandvisual—thegardenofflowersandscents,thegirlwithherprovokingcontemptandhertragiclonelinessofahopelesscastaway—waseverlastinglydangledbeforemyeyes,forthousandsofmilesalongtheopensea。Andasifbyasatanicrefinementofironyitwasaccompaniedbyamostawfulsmell。Whiffsfromdecayingpotatoespursuedmeonthepoop,theymingledwithmythoughts,withmyfood,poisonedmyverydreams。Theymadeanatmosphereofcorruptionfortheship。

  IremonstratedwithMr。Burnsaboutthisexcessivecare。Iwouldhavebeenwellcontenttobattenthehatchdownandletthemperishunderthedeck。

  Thatperhapswouldhavebeenunsafe。Thehorridemanationsmighthaveflavouredthecargoofsugar。Theyseemedstrongenoughtotainttheveryironwork。InadditionMr。Burnsmadeitapersonalmatter。Heassuredmeheknewhowtotreatacargoofpotatoesatsea—hadbeeninthetradeasaboy,hesaid。Hemeanttomakemylossassmallaspossible。Whatbetweenhisdevotion—itmusthavebeendevotion—andhisvanity,Ipositivelydarednotgivehimtheordertothrowmycommercial—ventureoverboard。Ibelievehewouldhaverefusedpointblanktoobeymylawfulcommand。AnunprecedentedandcomicalsituationwouldhavebeencreatedwithwhichIdidnotfeelequaltodeal。

  Iwelcomedthecomingofbadweatherasnosailorhadeverdone。

  WhenatlastIhovetheshipto,topickupthepilotoutsidePortPhilipHeads,theafter—hatchhadnotbeenopenedformorethanaweekandImighthavebelievedthatnosuchthingasapotatohadeverbeenonboard。

  Itwasanabominableday,raw,blustering,withgreatsquallsofwindandrain;thepilot,acheeryperson,lookedaftertheshipandchattedtome,streamingfromheadtofoot;andtheheavierthelashofthedownpourthemorepleasedwithhimselfandeverythingaroundhimheseemedtobe。Herubbedhiswethandswithasatisfaction,whichtome,whohadstoodthatkindofthingforseveraldaysandnights,seemedinconceivableinanynon—aquaticcreature。

  \"Youseemtoenjoygettingwet,Pilot,\"Iremarked。

  Hehadabitoflandroundhishouseinthesuburbsanditwasofhisgardenhewasthinking。Atthesoundofthewordgarden,unheard,unspokenforsomanydays,Ihadavisionofgorgeouscolour,ofsweetscents,ofagirlishfigurecrouchinginachair。

  Yes。ThatwasadistinctemotionbreakingintothepeaceIhadfoundinthesleeplessanxietiesofmyresponsibilityduringaweekofdangerousbadweather。TheColony,thepilotexplained,hadsufferedfromunparalleleddrought。Thiswasthefirstdecentdropofwatertheyhadhadforsevenmonths。Therootcropswerelost。

  And,tryingtobecasual,butwithvisibleinterest,heaskedmeifIhadperchanceanypotatoestospare。

  Potatoes!Ihadmanagedtoforgetthem。InamomentIfeltplungedintocorruptionuptomyneck。Mr。Burnswasmakingeyesatmebehindthepilot’sback。

  Finally,heobtainedaton,andpaidtenpoundsforit。ThiswastwicethepriceofmybargainwithJacobus。Thespiritofcovetousnesswokeupinme。Thatnight,inharbour,beforeI

  slept,theCustomHousegalleycamealongside。Whilehisunderlingswereputtingsealsonthestorerooms,theofficerinchargetookmeasideconfidentially。\"Isay,Captain,youdon’thappentohaveanypotatoestosell。\"

  Clearlytherewasapotatofamineintheland。Ilethimhaveatonfortwelvepoundsandhewentawayjoyfully。ThatnightI

  dreamtofapileofgoldintheformofagraveinwhichagirlwasburied,andwokeupcallouswithgreed。Oncallingatmyship—

  broker’soffice,thatman,aftertheusualbusinesshadbeentransacted,pushedhisspectaclesuponhisforehead。

  \"Iwasthinking,Captain,thatcomingfromthePearloftheOceanyoumayhavesomepotatoestosell。\"

  Isaidnegligently:\"Oh,yes,Icouldspareyouaton。Fifteenpounds。\"

  Heexclaimed:\"Isay!\"Butafterstudyingmyfaceforawhileacceptedmytermswithafaintgrimace。Itseemsthatthesepeoplecouldnotexistwithoutpotatoes。Icould。Ididn’twanttoseeapotatoaslongasIlived;butthedemonoflucrehadtakenpossessionofme。HowthenewsgotaboutIdon’tknow,but,returningonboardratherlate,Ifoundasmallgroupofmenofthecostertypehangingaboutthewaist,whileMr。Burnswalkedtoandfrothequarterdeckloftily,keepingatriumphanteyeonthem。

  Theyhadcometobuypotatoes。

  \"Thesechapshavebeenwaitinghereinthesunforhours,\"Burnswhisperedtomeexcitedly。\"Theyhavedrankthewater—caskdry。

  Don’tyouthrowawayyourchances,sir。Youaretoogood—natured。\"

  Iselectedamanwiththicklegsandamanwithacastinhiseyetonegotiatewith;simplybecausetheywereeasilydistinguishablefromtherest。\"Youhavethemoneyonyou?\"Iinquired,beforetakingthemdownintothecabin。

  \"Yes,sir,\"theyansweredinonevoice,slappingtheirpockets。I

  likedtheirairofquietdetermination。LongbeforetheendofthedayallthepotatoesweresoldataboutthreetimesthepriceIhadpaidforthem。Mr。Burns,feverishandexulting,congratulatedhimselfonhisskilfulcareofmycommercialventure,buthintedplainlythatIoughttohavemademoreofit。

  ThatnightIdidnotsleepverywell。IthoughtofJacobusbyfitsandstarts,betweensnatchesofdreamsconcernedwithcastawaysstarvingonadesertislandcoveredwithflowers。Itwasextremelyunpleasant。Inthemorning,tiredandunrefreshed,Isatdownandwrotealonglettertomyowners,givingthemacarefully—thought—

  outschemefortheship’semploymentintheEastandabouttheChinaSeasforthenexttwoyears。Ispentthedayatthattaskandfeltsomewhatmoreatpeacewhenitwasdone。

  Theirreplycameinduecourse。Theyweregreatlystruckwithmyproject;butconsideringthat,notwithstandingtheunfortunatedifficultywiththebags(whichtheytrustedIwouldknowhowtoguardagainstinthefuture),thevoyageshowedaveryfairprofit,theythoughtitwouldbebettertokeeptheshipinthesugartrade—atleastforthepresent。

  Iturnedoverthepageandreadon:

  \"WehavehadaletterfromourgoodfriendMr。Jacobus。Wearepleasedtoseehowwellyouhavehititoffwithhim;for,nottospeakofhisassistanceintheunfortunatematterofthebags,hewritesusthatshouldyou,byusingallpossibledispatch,managetobringtheshipbackearlyintheseasonhewouldbeabletogiveusagoodrateoffreight。Wehavenodoubtthatyourbestendeavours……etc……etc。\"

  Idroppedtheletterandsatmotionlessforalongtime。ThenI

  wrotemyanswer(itwasashortone)andwentashoremyselftopostit。ButIpassedoneletter—box,thenanother,andintheendfoundmyselfgoingupCollinsStreetwiththeletterstillinmypocket—againstmyheart。CollinsStreetatfouro’clockintheafternoonisnotexactlyadesertsolitude;butIhadneverfeltmoreisolatedfromtherestofmankindaswhenIwalkedthatdayitscrowdedpavement,battlingdesperatelywithmythoughtsandfeelingalreadyvanquished。

  TherecameamomentwhentheawfultenacityofJacobus,themanofonepassionandofoneidea,appearedtomealmostheroic。Hehadnotgivenmeup。Hehadgoneagaintohisodiousbrother。Andthenheappearedtomeodioushimself。Wasitforhisownsakeorforthesakeofthepoorgirl?Andonthatlastsuppositionthememoryofthekisswhichmissedmylipsappalledme;forwhateverhehadseen,orguessedat,orrisked,heknewnothingofthat。

  Unlessthegirlhadtoldhim。HowcouldIgobacktofanthatfatalsparkwithmycoldbreath?No,no,thatunexpectedkisshadtobepaidforatitsfullprice。

  Atthefirstletter—boxIcametoIstoppedandreachingintomybreast—pocketItookouttheletter—itwasasifIwerepluckingoutmyveryheart—anddroppeditthroughtheslit。ThenIwentstraightonboard。

  IwonderedwhatdreamsIwouldhavethatnight;butasitturnedoutIdidnotsleepatall。AtbreakfastIinformedMr。BurnsthatIhadresignedmycommand。

  Hedroppedhisknifeandforkandlookedatmewithindignation。

  \"Youhave,sir!Ithoughtyoulovedtheship。\"

  \"SoIdo,Burns,\"Isaid。\"ButthefactisthattheIndianOceanandeverythingthatisinithaslostitscharmforme。IamgoinghomeaspassengerbytheSuezCanal。\"

  \"Everythingthatisinit,\"herepeatedangrily。\"I’veneverheardanybodytalklikethis。Andtotellyouthetruth,sir,allthetimewehavebeentogetherI’veneverquitemadeyouout。What’soneoceanmorethananother?Charm,indeed!\"

  Hewasreallydevotedtome,Ibelieve。ButhecheeredupwhenI

  toldhimthatIhadrecommendedhimformysuccessor。

  \"Anyhow,\"heremarked,\"letpeoplesaywhattheylike,thisJacobushasservedyourturn。Imustadmitthatthispotatobusinesshaspaidextremelywell。Ofcourse,ifonlyyouhad—\"

  \"Yes,Mr。Burns,\"Iinterrupted。\"Quiteasmileoffortune。\"

  ButIcouldnottellhimthatitwasdrivingmeoutoftheshipI

  hadlearnedtolove。AndasIsatheavy—heartedatthatparting,seeingallmyplansdestroyed,mymodestfutureendangered—forthiscommandwaslikeafootinthestirrupforayoungman—hegaveupcompletelyforthefirsttimehiscriticalattitude。

  \"Awonderfulpieceofluck!\"hesaid。

  THESECRETSHARER—ANEPISODEFROMTHECOAST

  Onmyrighthandtherewerelinesoffishing—stakesresemblingamysterioussystemofhalf—submergedbamboofences,incomprehensibleinitsdivisionofthedomainoftropicalfishes,andcrazyofaspectasifabandonedforeverbysomenomadtribeoffishermennowgonetotheotherendoftheocean;fortherewasnosignofhumanhabitationasfarastheeyecouldreach。Totheleftagroupofbarrenislets,suggestingruinsofstonewalls,towers,andblockhouses,haditsfoundationssetinablueseathatitselflookedsolid,sostillandstablediditliebelowmyfeet;eventhetrackoflightfromthewesteringsunshonesmoothly,withoutthatanimatedglitterwhichtellsofanimperceptibleripple。AndwhenIturnedmyheadtotakeapartingglanceatthetugwhichhadjustleftusanchoredoutsidethebar,Isawthestraightlineoftheflatshorejoinedtothestablesea,edgetoedge,withaperfectandunmarkedcloseness,inonelevelledfloorhalfbrown,halfblueundertheenormousdomeofthesky。Correspondingintheirinsignificancetotheisletsofthesea,twosmallclumpsoftrees,oneoneachsideoftheonlyfaultintheimpeccablejoint,markedthemouthoftheriverMeinamwehadjustleftonthefirstpreparatorystageofourhomewardjourney;and,farbackontheinlandlevel,alargerandloftiermass,thegrovesurroundingthegreatPaknampagoda,wastheonlythingonwhichtheeyecouldrestfromthevaintaskofexploringthemonotonoussweepofthehorizon。Hereandtheregleamsasofafewscatteredpiecesofsilvermarkedthewindingsofthegreatriver;andonthenearestofthem,justwithinthebar,thetugsteamingrightintothelandbecamelosttomysight,hullandfunnelandmasts,asthoughtheimpassiveearthhadswallowedherupwithoutaneffort,withoutatremor。Myeyefollowedthelightcloudofhersmoke,nowhere,nowthere,abovetheplain,accordingtothedeviouscurvesofthestream,butalwaysfainterandfartheraway,tillIlostitatlastbehindthemitre—shapedhillofthegreatpagoda。AndthenIwasleftalonewithmyship,anchoredattheheadoftheGulfofSiam。

  Shefloatedatthestarting—pointofalongjourney,verystillinanimmensestillness,theshadowsofhersparsflungfartotheeastwardbythesettingsun。AtthatmomentIwasaloneonherdecks。Therewasnotasoundinher—andaroundusnothingmoved,nothinglived,notacanoeonthewater,notabirdintheair,notacloudinthesky。Inthisbreathlesspauseatthethresholdofalongpassageweseemedtobemeasuringourfitnessforalongandarduousenterprise,theappointedtaskofbothourexistencestobecarriedout,farfromallhumaneyes,withonlyskyandseaforspectatorsandforjudges。

  Theremusthavebeensomeglareintheairtointerferewithone’ssight,becauseitwasonlyjustbeforethesunleftusthatmyroamingeyesmadeoutbeyondthehighestridgeoftheprincipalisletofthegroupsomethingwhichdidawaywiththesolemnityofperfectsolitude。Thetideofdarknessflowedonswiftly;andwithtropicalsuddennessaswarmofstarscameoutabovetheshadowyearth,whileIlingeredyet,myhandrestinglightlyonmyship’srailasifontheshoulderofatrustedfriend。But,withallthatmultitudeofcelestialbodiesstaringdownatone,thecomfortofquietcommunionwithherwasgoneforgood。Andtherewerealsodisturbingsoundsbythistime—voices,footstepsforward;thestewardflittedalongthemaindeck,abusilyministeringspirit;ahand—belltinkledurgentlyunderthepoop—deck……

  Ifoundmytwoofficerswaitingformenearthesuppertable,inthelightedcuddy。Wesatdownatonce,andasIhelpedthechiefmate,Isaid:

  \"Areyouawarethatthereisashipanchoredinsidetheislands?I

  sawhermastheadsabovetheridgeasthesunwentdown。\"

  Heraisedsharplyhissimpleface,overchargedbyaterriblegrowthofwhisker,andemittedhisusualejaculations:\"Blessmysoul,sir!Youdon’tsayso!\"

  Mysecondmatewasaround—cheeked,silentyoungman,gravebeyondhisyears,Ithought;butasoureyeshappenedtomeetIdetectedaslightquiveronhislips。Ilookeddownatonce。Itwasnotmyparttoencouragesneeringonboardmyship。Itmustbesaid,too,thatIknewverylittleofmyofficers。Inconsequenceofcertaineventsofnoparticularsignificance,excepttomyself,Ihadbeenappointedtothecommandonlyafortnightbefore。NeitherdidI

  knowmuchofthehandsforward。Allthesepeoplehadbeentogetherforeighteenmonthsorso,andmypositionwasthatoftheonlystrangeronboard。Imentionthisbecauseithassomebearingonwhatistofollow。ButwhatIfeltmostwasmybeingastrangertotheship;andifallthetruthmustbetold,Iwassomewhatofastrangertomyself。Theyoungestmanonboard(barringthesecondmate),anduntriedasyetbyapositionofthefullestresponsibility,Iwaswillingtotaketheadequacyoftheothersforgranted。Theyhadsimplytobeequaltotheirtasks;butI

  wonderedhowfarIshouldturnoutfaithfultothatidealconceptionofone’sownpersonalityeverymansetsupforhimselfsecretly。

  Meantimethechiefmate,withanalmostvisibleeffectofcollaborationonthepartofhisroundeyesandfrightfulwhiskers,wastryingtoevolveatheoryoftheanchoredship。Hisdominanttraitwastotakeallthingsintoearnestconsideration。Hewasofapainstakingturnofmind。Asheusedtosay,he\"likedtoaccounttohimself\"forpracticallyeverythingthatcameinhisway,downtoamiserablescorpionhehadfoundinhiscabinaweekbefore。Thewhyandthewhereforeofthatscorpion—howitgotonboardandcametoselecthisroomratherthanthepantry(whichwasadarkplaceandmorewhatascorpionwouldbepartialto),andhowonearthitmanagedtodrownitselfintheinkwellofhiswriting—

  desk—hadexercisedhiminfinitely。Theshipwithintheislandswasmuchmoreeasilyaccountedfor;andjustaswewereabouttorisefromtablehemadehispronouncement。Shewas,hedoubtednot,ashipfromhomelatelyarrived。Probablyshedrewtoomuchwatertocrossthebarexceptatthetopofspringtides。

  Thereforeshewentintothatnaturalharbourtowaitforafewdaysinpreferencetoremaininginanopenroadstead。

  \"That’sso,\"confirmedthesecondmate,suddenly,inhisslightlyhoarsevoice。\"Shedrawsovertwentyfeet。She’stheLiverpoolshipSephorawithacargoofcoal。Hundredandtwenty—threedaysfromCardiff。\"

  Welookedathiminsurprise。

  \"Thetugboatskippertoldmewhenhecameonboardforyourletters,sir,\"explainedtheyoungman。\"Heexpectstotakeheruptheriverthedayafterto—morrow。\"

  Afterthusoverwhelminguswiththeextentofhisinformationheslippedoutofthecabin。Themateobservedregretfullythathe\"couldnotaccountforthatyoungfellow’swhims。\"Whatpreventedhimtellingusallaboutitatonce,hewantedtoknow。

  Idetainedhimashewasmakingamove。Forthelasttwodaysthecrewhadhadplentyofhardwork,andthenightbeforetheyhadverylittlesleep。IfeltpainfullythatI—astranger—wasdoingsomethingunusualwhenIdirectedhimtoletallhandsturninwithoutsettingananchor—watch。Iproposedtokeepondeckmyselftilloneo’clockorthereabouts。Iwouldgetthesecondmatetorelievemeatthathour。

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