CHAPTERXI
IfancyVeronicaisgoingtobeanauthoress。Hermotherthinksthismayaccountformanythingsaboutherthathavebeentroublingus。
Thestorynevergotfar。Itwaslaidasideforthemorealluringworkofplay—writing,andapparentlyforgotten。Icameacrossthecopy—bookcontainingher\"RoughNotes\"theotherday。Thereisdecidedflavouraboutthem。Itranscribeselections;thespelling,asbefore,beingmyown。
\"ThesceneislaidintheMoon。Buteverythingisjustthesameasdownhere。Withoneexception。Thechildrenrule。Thegrown—upsdonotlikeit。Buttheycannothelpit。Somethinghashappenedtothem。Theydon’tknowwhat。Andtheworldisasitusedtobe。Inthesweetoldstory—books。Beforesincame。Therearefairiesthatdanceo’nights。AndWitches。Thatlureyou。Andthenturnyouintothings。Andadragonwholivesinacave。Andspringsoutatpeople。Andeatsthem。Sothatyouhavetobecareful。Andalltheanimalstalk。Andtherearegiants。Andlotsofmagic。Anditisthechildrenwhoknoweverything。Andwhattodoforit。Andtheyhavetoteachthegrown—ups。Andthegrown—upsdon’tbelievehalfofit。Andarefartoofondofarguing。Whichisasoretrialtothechildren。Buttheyhavepatience,andarejust。
\"Ofcoursethegrown—upshavetogotoschool。Theyhavemuchtolearn。Poorthings!Andtheyhateit。Theytakenointerestinfairylore。AndwhatwouldhappentothemiftheygotwreckedonaDesertIslandtheydon’tseemtocare。Andthentherearelanguages。
Whattheywillneedwhentheycometobechildren。Andhavetotalktoalltheanimals。Andmagic。Whichisdeep。Andtheyhateit。
Andsayitisrot。Theyarefulloftricks。Onecatchesthemreadingtrashynovels。Underthedesk。Allaboutlove。Whichiswastingtheirchildren’smoney。AndGodknowsitishardenoughtoearn。Butthechildrenarenotangrywiththem。Rememberinghowtheyfeltthemselves。Whentheyweregrownup。Onlyfirm。
\"Thechildrengivethemplentyofholidays。Becauseholidaysaregoodforeveryone。Theyfreshenyouup。Butthegrown—upsareverystupid。Anddonotcareforsensiblegames。SuchasIndians。AndPirates。Whatwouldsharpentheirfaculties。Andsofitthemforthefuture。Theyonlycaretoplaywithaball。Whichisofnohelp。Tothesternrealitiesoflife。Ortalk。Lord,howtheytalk!
\"Thereisonegrown—up。Whoisveryclever。Hecantalkabouteverything。Butitleadstonothing。Andspoilstheparty。Sotheysendhimtobed。Andtherearetwogrown—ups。Amaleandafemale。
Andtheytalklove。Allthetime。Evenonfinedays。Whichismaudlin。Butthechildrenarepatientwiththem。Knowingittakesallsorts。Tomakeaworld。Andtrustingtheywillgrowoutofit。
Andofcoursetherearegrown—upswhoaregood。Andacomforttotheirchildren。
\"Andeverythingthechildrenlikeisgood。Andwholesome。Andeverythingthegrown—upslikeisbadforthem。ANDTHEYMUSTN’THAVE
IT。Theyclamourforteaandcoffee。Whatunderminestheirnervoussystem。Andwastetheirmoneyinthetuckshop。Uponchops。Andturtlesoup。Andthechildrenhavetoputthemtobed。Andgivethempills。Tilltheyfeelbetter。
\"ThereisalittlegirlnamedPrue。WholiveswithalittleboynamedSimon。Theymeanwell。Buthaven’tmuchsense。Theyhavetwogrown—ups。Amaleandafemale。NamedPeterandMartha。
Respectively。Theyarejusttheordinarygrown—ups。Neitherbetternorworse。Andmuchmightbedonewiththem。Bykindness。ButPrueandSimonGOTHEWRONGWAYTOWORK。Itisblameblamealldaylong。
Butasforpraise。Ohnever!
\"Onesummer’sdayPrueandSimontakePeterforawalk。Inthecountry。Andtheymeetacow。Andtheythinkthisagoodopportunity。TotestPeter’sknowledge。Oflanguages。Sotheytellhimtotalktothecow。Andhetalkstothecow。Andthecowdon’tunderstandhim。Andhedon’tunderstandthecow。Andtheyaremadwithhim。’Whatistheuse,’theysay。’Ofourpayingexpensivefees。Tohaveyoutaughtthelanguage。Byafirst—classcow。Andwhenyoucomeoutintothecountry。Youcan’ttalkit。’Andhesayshedidtalkit。Buttheywillnotlistentohim。Butgoonraving。
Andintheenditturnsout。ITWASAJERSEYCOW!Whattalkedadialect。Soofcoursehecouldn’tunderstandit。Butdidtheyapologise?Ohdearno。
\"Anothertime。Onemorningatbreakfast。Marthadidn’tlikeherraspberryvinegar。Soshedidn’tdrinkit。AndSimoncameintothenursery。AndhesawthatMarthahadn’tdrunkherraspberryvinegar。
Andheaskedherwhy。Andshesaidshedidn’tlikeit。Becauseitwasnasty。Andhesaiditwasn’tnasty。AndthatsheOUGHTtolikeit。Andhowitwasshocking。Thewaygrown—upsnowadaysgrumbled。
Atgoodwholesomefood。Providedforthembytheirtoo—indulgentchildren。AndhowwhenHEwasagrown—up。Hewouldneverhavedared。Andsoon。Allintheusualstyle。Andtoproveitwasn’tnasty。Hepouredhimselfoutacupful。Anddrankitoff。Inagulp。
Andhesaiditwasdelicious。Andturnedpale。Andlefttheroom。
\"AndPruecameintothenursery。AndshesawthatMarthahadn’tdrunkherraspberryvinegar。Andsheaskedherwhy。AndMarthatoldherhowshedidn’tlikeit。Becauseitwasnasty。AndPruetoldhersheoughttobeashamedofherself。Fornotlikingit。Becauseitwasgoodforher。Andreallyverynice。Andanyhowshe’dGOTtolikeit。Andnotgetstuffingherselfupwithmessyteaandcoffee。
Becauseshewouldn’thaveit。Andtherewasanendofit。Andsoon。Andtoproveitwasallright。Shepouredherselfoutacupful。
Anddrankitoff。Inagulp。Andshesaidtherewasnothingwrongwithit。Nothingwhatever。Andturnedpale。Andlefttheroom。
\"Anditwasn’traspberryvinegar。Butjustredink。Whathadgotputintotheraspberryvinegardecanter。Byanoversight。Andtheyneedn’thavebeenillatall。Ifonlytheyhadlistened。TopooroldMartha。Butno。Thatwastheirfixedidea。Thatgrown—upshadn’tanysense。Atall。Whatisamistake。Asoneperceives。\"
Othercharactershadbeensketched,someofthemtobeabandonedafterafewboldtouches:thedifficultyofavoidingtoocloseaportraituretothelivingoriginalhavingapparentlyprovedirksome。
Againstonesuch,evidentlyanattempttohelpDickseehimselfinhistruecolours,Ifindthismarginal,noteinpencil:\"Betternot。
Mightmakehimratty。\"Oppositetoanother——obviouslyofMrs。St。
Leonard,andwithinstinctforalliteration——isscribbled;\"Tooterriblytrue。She’dtwigit。\"
Anothercharacteristhatofagent:\"Withacertaingift。Fortellingstories。SomeofthemNOTBAD。\"Apromisingparty,onthewhole。Indeed,onemightsay,judgingfromdescription,aquiterationalperson:\"WHENNOTONTHERANTAN。Butinconsistent。\"Heisthegrown—upofalittlegirl:\"Notbeautiful。Butstrangelyattractive。WhomwewillcallEnid。\"OnegathersthatifallthechildrenhadbeenEnids,thensurelythelastwordinworldshadbeensaid。Shehasonlythisonegrown—upofherveryown;butshemakesitherbusinesstoadoptandreformalltheincorrigibleoldfolktheotherchildrenhavedespairedof。Itisalldonebykindness。\"SheisEVERpatient。Andjust。\"ProminentamonghernumerousPROTEGEES
isamilitaryman,anelderlycolonel;untilshetookhiminhand,theawfulexampleofwhatagrown—upmighteasilybecome,lefttothecareofincompetentinfants。Hedefieshisownchild,avirtuousyouth,but\"lackinginsympathy;\"isrudetohislittlenephewsandnieces;aholyterrortohisgoverness。Heuseswickedwords,pickedupfromretiredpirates。\"Ofcoursewithoutunderstanding。Theirterriblesignificance。\"HestealstheIndian’sfire—water。\"Whatfewcanpartakeof。Withimpunity。\"CertainlynottheColonel。
\"Canthisbehe!Thisgibberingwreck!\"Hehidescigarsinahollowtree,andsmokesonthesly。Heplaystruant。Luresotheroldgentlemenawayfromtheirlessonstojoinhim。Theyarediscoveredinthewoods,inacave,playingwhistforsixpennypoints。
DoesEnidstormandbullyrag;threatenthatifevershecatcheshimsomuchaslookingatacardagainshewillgostraightoutandtellthedragon,whowillinhisturnbesoshockedthatinallprobabilityhewilldecideoncomingbackwithhertokillandeattheColonelonthespot?No。\"Sucharenothermethods。\"Insteadshesmiles:\"indulgently。\"Shesaysitisonlynaturalforgrown—
upstolikeplayingcards。Sheisnotangrywithhim。Andthereisnoneedforhimtorunawayandhideinanastydampcave。\"SHE
HERSELFWILLPLAYWHISTWITHHIM。\"TheeffectupontheColonelisimmediate:heburstsintotears。Sheplayswhistwithhiminthegarden:\"Afterschoolhours。WhenhehasbeenGOOD。\"Doubledummy,onepresumes。OneleavestheColonel,intheend,curedofhispassionforwhist。Whetherastheconsequenceofherplayorherinfluencethe\"RoughNotes\"givenoindication。
Intheplay,Iaminclinedtothink,Veronicareceivedassistance。
ThehousehadgotitselffinishedearlyinSeptember。YoungButehascertainlydonewonders。Weperformeditintheemptybilliard—room,followedbyaone—actpieceofmyown。Theoccasiondiddutyasahouse—warming。Wehadquiteacrowd,andendedupwithadance。
Everybodyseemedtoenjoythemselves,exceptyoungBertieSt。
Leonard,whoplayedthePrince,andcouldnotgetoutofhishelmetintimeforsupper。Itwasagoodhelmet,buthadbeenfastenedclumsily;andinexperiencedpeopletryingtohelphadonlysucceededinjambingallthescrews。Notonlywouldn’titcomeoff,itwouldnotevenopenforadrink。Allthoughtitanexcellentjoke,withtheexceptionofyoungHerbertSt。Leonard。OurMayor,acheerfullittlemanandverypopular,saidthatitoughttobesenttoPUNCH。
ThelocalreporterremindedhimthatthelateJohnLeechhadalreadymadeuseofpreciselythesameincidentforacomicillustration,afterwardsrememberingthatitwasnotLeech,butthelatePhilMay。
Heseemedtothinkthisendedthematter。St。LeonardandtheVicar,whoarerivalauthoritiesuponthesubject,fellintoanargumentuponarmouringeneral,withspecialreferencetothefourteenthcentury。Eachusedtheboy’sheadtoconfirmhisowntheory,passingittriumphantlyfromonetotheother。WehadtosendoffyoungHopkinsinthedonkey—cartfortheblacksmith。Ihavefoundout,bytheway,howitisyoungHopkinsmakesourdonkeygo。YoungHopkinsarguesitisfarlessbrutalthanwhackinghim,especiallyafterexperiencehasprovedthatheevidentlydoesnotknowwhyyouarewhackinghim。Iamnotatallsuretheboyisnotright。
JanieplayedtheFairyGodmammainawhitewigandpanniers。Shewillmakeabeautifuloldlady。Thewhitehairgiveshertheonethingthatshelacks:distinction。Ifoundmyselfglancingapprehensivelyroundtheroom,wishingwehadnotinvitedsomanyeligiblebachelors。Dickismakingmeanxious。Thesenseofhisownunworthiness,whichhascometohimquitesuddenly,andapparentlywithalltheshockofanewdiscovery,hascompletelyunnervedhim。
Itisahealthysentiment,anddoeshimgood。ButIdonotwantitcarriedtothelengthoflosingher。Thethoughtofwhathemightonedaybringhomehasbeenanightmaretomeeversinceheleftschool。Isupposeitistomostfathers。Especiallyifonethinksofthewomenonelovedoneselfwhenintheearlytwenties。Alargepale—facedgirl,whoservedinabun—shopintheStrand,isthefirstIcanrecollect。HowItrembledwhenbychanceherhandtouchedmine!Icannotrecallasingleattractionaboutherexcepthersize,yetfornearlysixmonthsIlunchedoffpastryandmineralwatersmerelytobenearher。Tothisverydayanattackofindigestionwillalwaysrecreateherimageinmymind。Anotherwasathin,sallowgirl,butwithmagnificenteyes,ImetoneafternoonintheSouthKensingtonMuseum。Shewasabrainless,vixenishgirl,butthememoryofhereyeswouldalwaysdrawmebacktoher。Morethantwo—
thirdsofourtimetogetherwespentinviolentquarrels;andallmyhopesofeternityIwouldhavegiventomakehermycompanionforlife。ButforLuck,intheshapeofawell—to—docabproprietor,asgreatanidiotasmyselfImighthavedoneit。Thethirdwasachorusgirl:onthewhole,thebestofthebunch。Herfatherwasacoachman,andshehadtenbrothersandsisters,mostofthemdoingwellinservice。Andshewassucceeded——ifIhavetheordercorrect—
—bytheex—wifeofasolicitor,asprightlylady;accordingtoherownaccountthevictimofcomplicatedinjustice。Idaresaytherewereothers,ifItookthetimetothink;butnotoneofthemcanI
rememberwithoutreturningthankstoProvidenceforhavinglosther。
Whatisonetodo?Therearedaysinspringtimewhenayoungmanoughtnottobeallowedoutsidethehouse。ThankHeavenandConventionitisnotthegirlswhopropose!Fewwomen,whowouldchoosetherightmomenttoputtheirhandsuponayoungman’sshoulders,and,lookingintohiseyes,askhimtomarrythemnextweek,wouldreceiveNoforananswer。Itisonlyourshynessthatsavesus。Awisefriendofmine,whohasobservedmuch,wouldhaveallthosemarryingunderfive—and—twentydivorcedbyautomaticeffluxionoftimeatforty,leavingthefewwhohadchosensatisfactorilytobereunitediftheywished:hisargumentbeingthattocondemngrownmenandwomentoabidebythechoiceofinexperiencedboysandgirlsisunjustandabsurd。TherewerenicegirlsIcouldhavefalleninlovewith。Theyneveroccurredtome。
Itwouldseemasifamanhadtolearntasteinwomenasinallotherthings,namely,byeducation。Hereandtheremayexistthebornconnoisseur。Butwithmostofusourfirstinstinctsaretowardsvulgarity。ItisBarrie,Ithink,whosaysthatifonlythereweresillywomenenoughtogoround,goodwomenwouldnevergetalookin。
Itiscertainlyremarkable,thenumberofsweetoldmaidsonemeets。
Almostasremarkableasthenumberofstupid,cross—grainedwives。
AsItellDick,Ihavenodesireforadaughter—in—lawofwhomhefeelshimselfworthy。Ifhecan’tdobetterthanthathehadbestremainsingle。Janieandhe,ifIknowanythingoflife,arejustsuitedforoneanother。Helpfulpeopletaketheirhappinessinhelping。Iknewjustsuchanother,once:asweet,industrious,sensiblegirl。Shemadethemistakeofmarryingathoroughlygoodman。Therewasnothingforhertodo。Sheendedbylosingallinterestinhim,devotingherselftoaHomeintheEastEndforthereformationofnewsboys。Itwasapitifulwaste:somanywomenwouldhavebeengladofhim;whiletotheordinarysinfulmanshewouldhavebeenalife—longcomfort。ImusthaveaserioustalktoDick。Ishallpointoutwhatagoodthingitwillbeforher。IcanseeDickkeepingherbusyandcontentedfortherestofherdays。
VeronicaplayedthePrincess,——withlittleboyFoy——\"SirRobertoftheCurse\"——asherpage。Anythingmoredignifiedhas,Ishouldsay,rarelybeenseenupontheEnglishstage。Amongherweddingpresentswere:TwoVotesforWomen,presentedbythelocalFireBrigade;aFlyingMachineof\"provedstability。Mightbeusedasabathingtent;\"aNationalTheatre,\"withColdWaterDoucheinBasementforreceptionofEnglishDramatists;\"RecipeforbuildingaNavy,withoutpayingforit,\"GiftofthatgreatFinancialExpert,SirHocusPocus;\"oneConscientiousIncomeTaxpayer,\"hasbeendrivenbyaLady;\"twoSocialistsinagreementastowhatitmeans,\"smalleroneslightlydamaged;\"oneContentedFarmer,\"BabylonianPeriod;\"andoneextra—sizedbottle,\"SolutionoftheServantProblem。\"
Dickplayedthe\"DragonwithoutaTail。\"Wehadtomakehimwithoutatailowingtothesmallnessofthestage。Hehadoncehadatail。
Butthatwasalongstory:addedtowhichtherewasnottimetotellit。LittleSallySt。Leonardplayedhiswife,andRobinawashismother—in—law。Somuchdependsuponone’smood。Whatanoceanofboredommightbesavedifsciencecouldbutgiveusabarometerforetellingusourchangesoftemperament!Howmuchmoretoourcomfortwecouldplanourlives,knowingthatonMonday,say,weshouldbefeelingfrivolous;onSaturday\"dulltobad—tempered。\"
ItookamanoncetoseeThePrivateSecretary。Ibeganbyenjoyingmyself,andendedbyfeelingashamedofmyselfandvexedwiththeschemeofcreation。Thatauthorsshouldwritesuchplays,thatactorsshouldbewillingtodegradeourcommonnaturebyappearinginthemwasexplainable,hesupposed,bythelawofsupplyanddemand。
Whathecouldnotunderstandwashowthepubliccouldcontrivetoextractamusementfromthem。Whatwastherefunnyinseeingapoorgentlemanshutupinabox?Whyshouldeverybodyroarwithlaughterwhenheaskedforabun?Peopleaskedforbunseveryday——peopleinrailwayrefreshmentrooms,inaeratedbreadshops。Wherewasthejoke?AmonthlaterIfoundmyselfbychanceoccupyingtheseatjustbehindhimatthepantomime。Thelowcomedianwasbathingababy,andtearsofmerrimentwererollingdownhischeeks。Tomethewholebusinessseemedpainfulandrevolting。Wewerebeingaskedtofinddelightinthespectacleofafather——scouringdownaninfantoftenderyearswithascrubbing—brush。Howwomen——manyofthemmothers——couldremainthroughsuchanexhibitionwithoutrisinginprotestappearedtomeanargumentagainstfemalesuffrage。Aladyentered,thewife,sotheprogrammeinformedme,ofaBaron!AllI
cansayisthatamorevulgar,lessprepossessingfemaleIneverwishtomeet。Ievendoubtedhersobriety。Shesatdownplumpuponthebaby。Shemusthavebeenawomanrisingsixteenstone,andforoneminutefifteensecondsbymywatchthewholehouserockedwithlaughter。ThatthethingwasonlyastagepropertyIfeltwasnoexcuse。Thehumour——heavensavethemark——layinthesuppositionthatwhatwewerewitnessingwastheagonyanddeath——fornochildcouldhavesurvivedthatwoman’sweight——ofarealbaby。HadIbeenabletotapmyselfbeforehandIshouldhavelearnedthatonthatparticularSaturdayIwasgoingtobe\"set—serious。\"InsteadofbookingaseatforthepantomimeIshouldhavegonetoalectureonEgyptianpotterywhichwasbeinggivenbyafriendofmineattheLondonLibrary,andhavehadagoodtime。
Childrencouldtaptheirparents,warneachotherthatfatherwas\"goingdown;\"thatmothernextweekwaslikelytobe\"gusty。\"
Childrenthemselvesmighthangouttheirlittlebarometers。I
rememberarainydayinacountryhouseduringtheChristmasholidays。WehadamongusaMemberofParliament:amanofsunnydisposition,extremelyfondofchildren。Hesaiditwasawfullyhardlinesonthelittlebeggarscoopedupinanursery;andborrowinghishost’smotor—coat,pretendedhewasabear。Heploddedroundonhishandsandkneesandgrowledagooddeal,andthechildrensatonthesofaandwatchedhim。Buttheydidn’tseemtobeenjoyingit,notmuch;andafteraquarterofanhourorsohenoticedthishimself。
Hethoughtitwas,maybe,thattheyweretiredofbears,andfanciedthatawhalemightrousethem。Heturnedthetableupsidedownandplacedthechildreninitonthreechairs,explainingtothemthattheywereship—wreckedsailorsonaraft,andthattheymustbecarefulthewhaledidnotgetunderneathitandupsetthem。Hedrapedasheetoverthetowel—horsetorepresentaniceberg,androlledhimselfupinamackintoshandfloppedabouttheflooronhisstomach,buttinghisheadoccasionallyagainstthetableinordertosuggesttothemtheirdanger。Theattitudeofthechildrenstillremainedthatofpolitespectators。True,theyoungestboydidmakethesuggestionofborrowingthekitchentoasting—fork,andemployingitasaharpoon;buteventhisappearedtobetheoutcomeratherofadesiretopleasethanofanywarmerinterest;and,thewhaleobjecting,theideafellthrough。Afterthatheclimbeduponthedresserandannouncedtothemthathewasanourang—outang。Theywatchedhimbreakasoup—tureen,andthentheeldestboy,steppingoutintothemiddleoftheroom,helduphisarm,andtheMemberofParliament,somewhatsurprised,satdownonthedresserandlistened。
\"Please,sir,\"saidtheeldestboy,\"we’reawfullysorry。It’sawfullygoodofyou,sir。Butsomehowwe’renotfeelinginthemoodforwildbeaststhisafternoon。\"
TheMemberofParliamentbroughtthemdownintothedrawing—room,wherewehadmusic;andthechildren,attheirownrequest,wereallowedtosinghymns。Thenextdaytheycameoftheirownaccord,andaskedtheMemberofParliamenttoplayatbeastswiththem;butitseemedhehadletterstowrite。
Therearetimeswhenjokesaboutmothers—in—lawstrikemeaslackingbothintasteandfreshness。Onthisparticulareveningtheycametomebringingwiththemallthefragranceofthedaysthatarenomore。
ThefirstplayIeversawdealtwiththesubjectofthemother—in—
law——the\"Problem\"Ithinkitwascalledinthosedays。TheoccasionwasanamateurperformancegiveninaidofthelocalRaggedSchool。
Acousinofmine,latelymarried,playedthewife;andmyaunt,I
remember,gotupandwalkedoutinthemiddleofthesecondact。
Robina,inspectaclesandanearlyVictorianbonnet,remindedmeofher。YoungButeplayedacomiccabman。ItwasattheoldHaymarket,inBuckstone’stime,thatIfirstmetthecabmanofartandliterature。Dearbibulous,becoatedcreature,withever—wrathfuloutstretchedpalmandhusky\"’Ere!Wot’sthis?\"Howgooditwastoseehimonceagain!IfeltIwantedtoclimboverthefoot—lightsandshakehimbythehand。ThetwinsplayedacoupleofYoungTurks,muchconcernedabouttheirconstitutions;andmadequiteahitwithatopicalduettotherefrain:\"AndsoyouseeThereasonheIsnottheBossforus。\"WeallagreeditwasapunworthyofTomHoodhimself。TheVicarthoughthehadhearditbefore,butthisseemedimprobable。TherewasaunanimouscallforAuthor,givingrisetosoundsofdiscussionbehindthecurtain。Eventuallythewholecompanyappeared,withVeronicainthecentre。IhadnoticedthroughoutthatthecentreofthestageappearedtobeVeronica’sfavouritespot。IcanseethemakingsofaleadingactressinVeronica。
Inmyownpiece,whichfollowed,RobinaandButeplayedayoungmarriedcouplewhodonotknowhowtoquarrel。Ithasalwaysstruckmehowmuchmoresatisfactorilypeoplequarrelonthestagethaninreallife。Onthestagetheman,havingmadeuphismind——tohaveitout,entersandclosesthedoor。Helightsacigarette;ifnotateetotallermixeshimselfabrandy—and—soda。Hiswifeallthistimeiscarefultoremainsilent。Quiteevidentitisthatheispreparingforherbenefitsomethingunpleasant,andchattermightdisturbhim。Tofillupthetimeshetoyswithanovelortouchessoftlythekeysofthepianountilheisquitecomfortableandreadytobegin。Heglidesintohissubjectwiththestudiedcalmofonewithalltheafternoonbeforehim。Shelistenstohiminraptattention。Shedoesnotdreamofinterruptinghim;wouldscornthesuggestionofchippinginwithanylittlenotionofherownlikelytodisarrangehistrainofthought。Allshedoeswhenhepauses,asoccasionallyhehastoforthepurposeoftakingbreath,istocometohisassistancewithshortencouragingremarks,such,forinstance,as:\"Well。\"\"Youthinkthat。\"\"AndifIdid?\"Herobjectseemstobetohelphimon。\"Goon,\"shesaysfromtimetotime,bitterly。
Andhegoeson。Towardstheend,whenheshowssignsofeasingup,sheputsittohimasonesportsmantoanother:Ishequitefinished?Isthatall?Sometimesitisn’t。Asoftenasnothehasbeensavingthepickofthebasketforthelast。
\"No,\"hesays,\"thatisnotall。Thereissomethingelse!\"
Thatisquiteenoughforher。Thatisallshewantedtoknow。Shemerelyaskedincasetheremightbe。Asitappearsthereis,shere—
settlesherselfinherchairandisagainallears。
Whenitdoescome——whenheisquitesurethereisnothinghehasforgotten,nolittlepointthathehasoverlooked,sherises。
\"Ihavelistenedpatiently,\"shebegins,\"toallthatyouhavesaid。\"
(Thedevilhimselfcouldnotdenythis。\"Patience\"hardlyseemstheword。\"Enthusiastically\"shemightalmosthavesaid)。\"Now\"——withrisinginflection——\"youlistentome。\"
Thestagehusband——alwaysthegentleman——bows;——stifflymaybe,butquitepolitely;andpreparesinhisturntooccupytheroleofdumbbutdignifieddefendant。Toemphasisethecomingchangeintheirpositions,theladymostprobablycrossesovertowhathashithertobeenhissideofthestage;whilehe,startingatthesamemoment,andpassingheraboutthecentre,settleshimselfdowninwhatmustberegardedasthelistener’sendoftheroom。Wethenhavethewholestoryoveragainfromherpointofview;andthistimeitisthegentlemanwhowouldbiteoffhistongueratherthanmakearetortcalculatedtoputtheladyoff。
Intheenditisthepartywhoisintherightthatconquers。Offthestagethisismoreorlessofatoss—up;onthestage,never。Ifjusticebewiththehusband,thenitishisvoicethat,graduallygrowinglouderandlouder,ringsatlasttriumphantthroughthehouse。Theladyseesherselfthatshehasbeentoblame,andwonderswhyitdidnotoccurtoherbefore——isgratefulfortherevelation,andaskstobeforgiven。If,ontheotherhand,itwasthehusbandwhowasatfault,thenitistheladywhowillbefoundeventuallyoccupyingthecentreofthestage;themiserablehusbandwho,morallyspeaking,willbetryingtogetunderthetable。
Now,inreallifethingsdon’thappenquitelikethis。Whatthequarrelinreallifesuffersfromiswantofsystem。Thereisnoorder,nosettledplan。Thereismuchtoomuchgo—as—you—pleaseaboutthequarrelinreallife,andtheresultisnaturallypuremuddle。Theman,turningthingsoverinthemorningwhileshaving,makesuphismindtohavethismatteroutandhavedonewithit。Heknowsexactlywhatheisgoingtosay。Herepeatsittohimselfatintervalsduringtheday。HewillfirstsayThis,andthenhewillgoontoThat;whileheisaboutithewillperhapsmentiontheOther。Hereckonsitwilltakehimaquarterofanhour。Whichwilljustgivehimtimetodressfordinner。
Afteritisover,andhelooksathiswatch,hefindsithastakenhimlongerthanthat。Addedtowhichhehassaidnexttonothing——
nexttonothing,thatis,ofwhathemeanttosay。Itwentwrongfromtheverystart。Asamatteroffacttherewasn’tanystart。Heenteredtheroomandclosedthedoor。Thatisasfarashegot。Thecigaretteheneverevenlighted。Thereoughttohavebeenaboxofmatchesonthemantelpiecebehindthephoto—frame。Andofcoursetherewerenonethere。Forhertoflyintoatempermerelybecauseheremindedherthathehadspokenaboutthisverymatteratleastahundredtimesbefore,andaccusehimofgoingabouthisownhouse\"stealing\"hisownmatcheswaspositivelylaughable。Theyhadquarrelledforaboutfiveminutesoverthosewretchedmatches,andthenforanothertenbecausehesaidthatwomenhadnosenseofhumour,andshewantedtoknowhowheknew。Afterthattherehadcroppedupthelastquarter’sgas—bill,andthatbyaprocessstillmysterioustohimhadledthemintothesubjectofhisbehaviouronthenightoftheHockeyClubdance。Byaneffortofalmostsupernaturalself—controlhehadcontrivedatlengthtointroducethesubjecthehadcomehomehalfanhourearlierthanusualonpurposetodiscuss。Itdidn’tinterestherintheleast。WhatshewasfullofbythistimewasagirlnamedArabellaJones。Shegotinquitealotwhilehewasvainlytryingtorememberwherehehadlastseenthedamnedgirl。HehadjustsucceededingettingbacktohisowntopicwhentheCuddifordgirlfromnextdoordashedinwithoutahattoborrowatuning—fork。Ithadbeenquiteabusinessfindingthetuning—fork,andwhenshewasgonetheyhadtobeginalloveragain。
Theyhadquarrelledaboutthedrawing—roomcarpet;abouthersisterFlorrie’sbirthdaypresent;andthewayhedrovethemotor—car。Ithadtakenthemoveranhourandahalf,andratherthanwastetheticketsforthetheatre,theyhadgonewithouttheirdinner。Thematterofthecoldchiselstillremainedtobethrashedout。
IthadoccurredtomethatthroughthemediumofthedramaImightshowhowthedomesticquarrelcouldsoeasilybeimproved。AdolphusGoodbody,aworthyyoungmandeeplyattachedtohiswife,feelsneverthelessthatthedinnerssheisinflictinguponhimarethreateningwithpermanentdamagehisdigestivesystem。Hedetermines,comewhatmay,toinsistuponachange。ElviraGoodbody,acharminggirl,admiringanddevotedtoherhusband,isnotwithstandingatrifleentete,especiallywhenherdomesticarrangementshappentobethethemeofdiscussion。Adolphus,hiscouragescrewedtothesticking—point,broachesthedifficultsubject;andforthefirsthalfoftheactmyaimwastopicturetheprogressofthehumanquarrel,notasitshouldbe,butasitis。
Theyneverreachthecook。Thefirstmentionoftheword\"dinner\"
remindsElvira(quicktoperceivethatargumentisbrewing,andalivetotheadvantageofgettinginfirst)thattwicethemonthbeforehehaddinedout,notreturningtillthesmallhoursofthemorning。
Whatshewantstoknowiswherethissortofthingisgoingtoend?
IfthepurposeofFreemasonryistheruinofthehomeandthedesertionofwomen,thenallshehastosay——itturnsouttobequiteagooddeal。Adolphus,whenabletogetinaword,suggeststhateleveno’clockatthelatestcanhardlybedescribedasthe\"smallhoursofthemorning\":thefaultwithwomenisthattheyneverwillconfinethemselvestothesimpletruth。Fromthatpointonwards,ascanbeimagined,thescenealmostwroteitself。Theyhavepassedthroughallthecustomarystages,andareplanning,withexaggeratedcalm,arrangementsfortheseparationwhicheachnowfeelstobeinevitable,whenaknockcomestothefront—door,andthereentersamutualfriend。
Theirhastyattemptstocoverupthetracesofmentaldisorderwithwhichtheatmosphereisstreweddonotdeceivehim。Therehasbeen,letussay,arippleonthewatersofperfectagreement。Come!Whatwasitallabout?
\"About!\"Theylookfromonetotheother。SurelyitwouldbesimplertotellhimwhatithadNOTbeenabout。Ithadbeenabouttheparrot,aboutherwantofpunctuality,abouthisusingthebutter—knifeforthemarmalade,aboutapairofslippershehadlostatChristmas,abouttheeducationquestion,andherdressmaker’sbill,andhisfriendGeorge,andthenext—doordog—
Themutualfriendcutsshortthecatalogue。Clearlythereisnothingforitbuttobeginthequarrelalloveragain;andthistime,iftheywillputthemselvesintohishands,hefeelssurehecanpromisevictorytowhicheveroneisintheright。
Elvira——shehasasweet,impulsivenature——throwsherarmsaroundhim:thatisallshewants。IfonlyAdolphuscouldbebroughttosee!Adolphusgripshimbythehand。IfonlyElvirawouldlistentosense!
Themutualfriend——heisanoldstage—manager——arrangesthescene:
Elviraineasy—chairbyfirewithcrochet。EnterAdolphus。Helightsacigarette;flingsthematchonthefloor;withhishandsinhispocketspacesupanddowntheroom;kicksafootstooloutofhisway。
\"TellmewhenIamtobegin,\"saysElvira。
Themutualfriendpromisestogivehertherightcue。
Adolphuscomestoahaltinthecentreoftheroom。
\"Iamsorry,mydear,\"hesays,\"butthereissomethingImustsaytoyou——somethingthatmaynotbealtogetherpleasantforyoutohear。\"
TowhichElvira,stillcrocheting,replies,\"Oh,indeed。Andpraywhatmaythatbe?\"
ThiswasnotElvira’sownidea。Springingfromherchair,shehadgotasfaras:\"Lookhere。Ifyouhavecomehomeearlymerelyforthepurposeofmakingarow——\"beforethemutualfriendcouldstopher。Themutualfriendwasfirm。Onlybyexactingstrictobediencecouldheguaranteeasuccessfulissue。Whatshehadgottosaywas,\"Oh,indeed。Etcetera。\"Themutualfriendhadneedofallhistacttopreventitsbecomingaquarrelofthree。
Adolphus,allowedtoproceed,explainedthatthesubjectaboutwhichhewishedtospeakwasthesubjectofdinner。Themutualfriendthistimewasbeforehand。Elvira’sretorttothatwas:\"Dinner!YoucomplainofthedinnersIprovideforyou?\"enablinghimtoreply,\"Yes,madam,Idocomplain,\"andtogivereasons。ItseemedtoElvirathatthemutualfriendhadlosthissenses。Totellherto\"wait\";that\"hertimewouldcome\";ofwhatusewasthat!Halfofwhatshewantedtosaywouldbegoneoutofherhead。AdolphusbroughttoaconclusionhiscriticismofElvira’skitchen;andthenElvira,incapableofrestrainingherselffurther,rosemajestically。
ThemutualfriendwassavedthetroubleofsuppressingAdolphus。
UntilElvirahadfinishedAdolphusnevergotanopening。Hegrumbledattheirdinners。He!whocandinenightafternightwithhispreciousFreemasons。Doeshethinkshelikesthemanybetter?She,doomedtostayathomeandeatthem。Whatdoeshetakeherfor?Anostrich?Whosefaultisitthattheykeepanincompetentcooktoooldtolearnandtooobstinatetowantto?Whoseoldfamilyservantwasshe?NotElvira’s。IthasbeentopleaseAdolphusthatshehassufferedthewoman。Andthisisherreward。This!Shebreaksdown。
Adolphusisastonishedandtroubled。Personallyheneverlikedthewoman。Faithfulshemayhavebeen,butacooknever。Hisownidea,hadhebeenconsulted,wouldhavebeenasmallpension。Elvirafallsuponhisneck。Whydidhenotsaysobefore?Adolphuspresseshertohisbosom。Ifonlyhehadknown!Theypromisethemutualfriendnevertoquarrelagainwithouthisassistance。
Theactingallroundwasquitegood。Ourcurate,whoisabachelor,saidittaughtalesson。Veronicahadtearsinhereyes。Shewhisperedtomethatshethoughtitbeautiful。ThereismoreinVeronicathanpeoplethink。
CHAPTERXII
Iamsorrythehouseisfinished。Thereisaproverb:\"Foolsbuildhousesforwisementolivein。\"Itdependsuponwhatyouareafter。
Thefoolgetsthefun,andthewisementhebricksandmortar。I
rememberawhimsicalstoryIpickedupatthebookstalloftheGaredeLyon。IreaditbetweenParisandFontainebleaumanyyearsago。
Threefriends,youthfulBohemians,smokingtheirpipesafterthemeagredinnerofacheaprestaurantintheLatinQuarter,felltothinkingoftheirpoverty,ofthelongandbitterstrugglethatlaybeforethem。
\"Mythemesaresooriginal,\"sighedtheMusician。\"Itwilltakemeayearoffetedaystoteachthepublictounderstandthem,evenifeverIdosucceed。AndmeanwhileIshallliveunknown,neglected;
watchingthemenwithoutidealspassingmebyintherace,splashedwiththemudfromtheircarriage—wheelsasIbeatthepavementswithwornshoes。Itisreallyamostunjustworld。\"
\"Anabominableworld,\"agreedthePoet。\"Butthinkofme!Mycaseisfarharderthanyours。Yourgiftlieswithinyou。Mineistotranslatewhatliesaroundme;andthat,forsofaraheadasIcansee,willalwaysbetheshadowsideoflife。TodevelopmygeniustoitsfullestIneedthesunshineofexistence。Mysoulisbeingstarvedforlackofthebeautifulthingsoflife。AlittleofthewealththatvulgarpeoplewastewouldmakeagreatpoetforFrance。
ItisnotonlyofmyselfthatIamthinking。\"
ThePainterlaughed。\"Icannotsoartoyourheights,\"hesaid。
\"Franklyspeaking,itismyselfthatchieflyappealstome。Whynot?
IgivetheworldBeauty,andinreturnwhatdoesitgiveme?Thisdingyrestaurant,whereIeatill—flavouredfoodoffhideousplatters,afoulgarretgivingontochimney—pots。Afterlongyearsofill—requitedlabourImay——asothershavebeforeme——comeintomykingdom:possessmystudiointheChampsElysees,myfinehouseatNeuilly;buttheprospectoftheinterveningperiod,Iconfess,appalsme。\"
Absorbedinthemselves,theyhadnotnoticedthatastranger,seatedataneighbouringtable,hadbeenlisteningwithattention。Heroseand,apologisingwitheasygraceforintrusionintoaconversationhecouldhardlyhaveavoidedoverhearing,requestedpermissiontobeofservice。Therestaurantwasdimlylighted;thethreefriendsonenteringhadchosenitsobscurestcorner。TheStrangerappearedtobewell—dressed;hisvoiceandbearingsuggestedthemanofaffairs;
hisface——whatfeeblelighttherewasbeingbehindhim——remainedinshadow。
Thethreefriendseyedhimfurtively:possiblysomerichbuteccentricpatronofthearts;notbeyondtheboundsofspeculationthathewasacquaintedwiththeirwork,hadreadthePoet’sversesinoneoftheminormagazines,hadstumbleduponsomesketchofthePainter’swhilebargain—huntingamongthedealersoftheQuartierSt。
Antoine,beenstruckbythebeautyoftheComposer’sNocturneinF
heardatsomestudent’sconcert;havingmadeenquiriesconcerningtheirhaunts,hadchosenthismethodofintroducinghimself。Theyoungmenmaderoomforhimwithfeelingsofhopemingledwithcuriosity。TheaffableStrangercalledforliqueurs,andhandedroundhiscigar—case。Andalmosthisfirstwordsbroughtthemjoy。
\"Beforewegofurther,\"saidthesmilingStranger,\"itismypleasuretoinformyouthatallthreeofyouaredestinedtobecomegreat。\"
Theliqueurstotheirunaccustomedpalateswereprovingpotent。TheStranger’scigarsweresingularlyaromatic。ItseemedthemostreasonablethingintheworldthattheStrangershouldbethusabletoforetelltothemtheirfuture。
\"Fame,fortunewillbeyours,\"continuedtheagreeableStranger。
\"Allthingsdelightfulwillbetoyourhand:theadorationofwomen,thehonourofmen,theincenseofSociety,joysspiritualandmaterial,beauteoussurroundings,choicefoods,allluxuryandease,theworldyourpleasure—ground。\"
Thestainedwallsofthedingyrestaurantwerefadingintospacebeforetheyoungmen’seyes。Theysawthemselvesasgodswalkinginthegardenoftheirhearts’desires。
\"But,alas,\"wentontheStranger——andwiththefirstnoteofhischangedvoicethevisionsvanished,thedingywallscameback——\"thesethingstaketime。Youwill,allthree,bewellpastmiddle—agebeforeyouwillreapthejustrewardofyourtoilandtalents。
Meanwhile——\"thesympatheticStrangershruggedhisshoulders——\"itistheoldstory:geniusspendingitsyouthbattlingforrecognitionagainstindifference,ridicule,envy;thespiritcrushedbyitssordidenvironment,thedrabmonotonyofnarrowdays。Therewillbewinternightswhenyouwilltrampthestreets,cold,hungry,forlorn;
summerdayswhenyouwillhideinyourattics,ashamedofthesunlightonyourraggedgarments;chilldawnswhenyouwillwatchwild—eyedthesufferingofthoseyoulove,helplessbyreasonofyourpovertytoalleviatetheirpain。\"
TheStrangerpausedwhiletheancientwaiterreplenishedtheemptyglasses。Thethreefriendsdrankinsilence。
\"Ipropose,\"saidtheStranger,withapleasantlaugh,\"thatwepassoverthiscustomaryperiodofprobation——thatweskiptheinterveningyears——arriveatonceatourtruedestination。\"
TheStranger,leaningbackinhischair,regardedthethreefriendswithasmiletheyfeltratherthansaw。AndsomethingabouttheStranger——theycouldnothavetoldthemselveswhat——madeallthingspossible。
\"Aquitesimplematter,\"theStrangerassuredthem。\"Alittlesleepandaforgetting,andtheyearsliebehindus。Come,gentlemen。
HaveIyourconsent?\"
Itseemedaquestionhardlyneedinganswer。Toescapeatonestridethelong,wearystruggle;toenterwithoutfightingintovictory!
Theyoungmenlookedatoneanother。Andeachone,thinkingofhisgain,barteredthebattleforthespoil。
Itseemedtothemthatsuddenlythelightswentout;andadarknesslikearushingwindsweptpastthem,filledwithmanysounds。Andthenforgetfulness。Andthenthecomingbackoflight。
Theywereseatedatatable,glitteringwithsilveranddaintychinaware,towhichtheredwineinVenetiangoblets,thevariedfruitandflowers,gavecolour。Theroom,furnishedtoogorgeouslyfortaste,theyjudgedtobeaprivatecabinetinoneofthegreatrestaurants。Ofsuchinteriorstheyhadoccasionallycaughtglimpsesthroughopenwindowsonsummernights。Itwassoftlyilluminatedbyshadedlamps。TheStranger’sfacewasstillinshadow。Butwhatsurprisedeachofthethreemostwastoobserveoppositehimtwomoreorlessbald—headedgentlemenofsomewhatflabbyappearance,whosefeatures,however,insomemysteriouswayappearedfamiliar。TheStrangerhadhiswine—glassraisedinhishand。
\"OurdearPaul,\"theStrangerwassaying,\"hasdeclined,withhiscustomarymodesty,anypublicrecognitionofhistriumph。Hewillnotrefusethreeoldfriendstheprivilegeofofferinghimtheirheartiestcongratulations。Gentlemen,IdrinknotonlytoourdearPaul,buttotheFrenchAcademy,whichinhonouringhimhashonouredFrance。\"
TheStranger,risingfromhischair,turnedhispiercingeyes——theonlypartofhimthatcouldbeclearlyseen——upontheastonishedPoet。Thetwoelderlygentlemenopposite,evidentlyasbewilderedasPaulhimself,takingtheircuefromtheStranger,drainedtheirglasses。StillfollowingtheStranger’slead,leanteachacrossthetableandshookhimwarmlybythehand。
\"Ibegpardon,\"saidthePoet,\"butreallyIamafraidImusthavebeenasleep。Woulditsoundrudetoyou\"——headdressedhimselftotheStranger:thefacesoftheelderlygentlemenoppositedidnotsuggesttheirbeingofmuchassistancetohim——\"ifIaskedyouwhereIwas?\"
AgainthereflickeredacrosstheStranger’sfacethesmilethatwasfeltratherthanseen。\"YouareinaprivateroomoftheCafePretali,\"heanswered。\"WearemetthiseveningtocelebrateyourrecentelevationintothecompanyoftheImmortals。\"
\"Oh,\"saidthePoet,\"thankyou。\"
\"TheAcademy,\"continuedtheStranger,\"isalwaysalittlelateintheseaffairs。Myself,Icouldhavewishedyourelectionhadtakenplacetenyearsago,whenallFrance——allFrancethatcounts,thatis——wastalkingofyou。Atfifty—three\"——theStrangertouchedlightlywithhisfingersthePoet’sfathand——\"onedoesnotwriteaswhenthesapwasrunningup,insteadofdown。\"
Slowly,memoryofthedingycafeintheRueSt。Louis,ofthestrangehappeningthattookplacetherethatnightwhenhewasyoung,creptbackintothePoet’sbrain。
\"Wouldyoumind,\"saidthePoet,\"woulditbetroublingyoutoomuchtotellmesomethingofwhathasoccurredtome?\"
\"Notintheleast,\"respondedtheagreeableStranger。\"Yourcareerhasbeenmostinteresting——forthefirstfewyearschieflytoyourself。YoumarriedMarguerite。YourememberMarguerite?\"
ThePoetrememberedher。
\"Amadthingtodo,somostpeoplewouldhavesaid,\"continuedtheStranger。\"Youhadnotasoubetweenyou。But,myself,Ithinkyouwerejustified。Youthcomestousbutonce。Andattwenty—fiveourbusinessistolive。Undoubtedlythemarriagehelpedyou。Youlivedanidyllicexistence,foratime,inatumble—downcottageatSuresnes,withagardenthatwentdowntotheriver。Poor,ofcourseyouwere;pooraschurchmice。Butwhofearspovertywhenhopeandlovearesingingonthebough!IreallythinkquiteyourbestworkwasdoneduringthoseyearsatSuresnes。Ah,thesweetness,thetendernessofit!TherehasbeennothinglikeitinFrenchpoetry。
Itmadenomarkatthetime;buttenyearslaterthepublicwentmadaboutit。Shewasdeadthen。Poorchild,ithadbeenahardstruggle。And,asyoumayremember,shewasalwaysfragile。YeteveninherdeathIthinkshehelpedyou。Thereenteredanewnoteintoyourpoetry,adepththathadhithertobeenwanting。Itwasthebestthingthatevercametoyou,yourloveforMarguerite。\"
TheStrangerrefilledhisglass,andpassedthedecanter。ButthePoetleftthewineunheeded。
\"Andthen,ah,yes,thenfollowedthatexcursionintopolitics。
ThosescathingarticlesyouwroteforLaLiberte!ItishardlyanexaggerationtosaythattheyalteredthewholeaspectofFrenchpoliticalthought。ThosewonderfulspeechesyoumadeduringyourelectioncampaignatAngers。Howthepeopleworshippedyou!Youmighthavecarriedyourportfoliohadyoupersisted。Butyoupoetsaresuchrestlessfellows。Andafterall,Idaresayyouhavereallyaccomplishedmorebyyourplays。Youremember——no,ofcourse,howcouldyou?——thefirstnightofLaConquette。ShallIeverforgetit!
Ihavealwaysreckonedthatthecrownofyourcareer。YourmarriagewithMadameDeschenelle——Idonotthinkitwasforthepublicgood。
PoorDeschenelle’smillions——isitnotso?Poetryandmillionsinterferewithoneanother。Butathousandpardons,mydearPaul。
Youhavedonesomuch。Itisonlyrightyoushouldnowbetakingyourease。Yourworkisfinished。\"
ThePoetdoesnotanswer。Sitsstaringbeforehimwitheyesturnedinward。ThePainter,theMusician:whatdidtheyearsbringtothem?TheStrangertellsthemalsoofallthattheyhavelost:ofthegriefsandsorrows,ofthehopesandfearstheyhavenevertasted,oftheirtearsthatendedinlaughter,ofthepainthatgavesweetnesstojoy,ofthetriumphsthatcametotheminthedaysbeforetriumphhadlostitssavour,ofthelovesandthelongingsandfervourstheywouldneverknow。Allwasended。TheStrangerhadgiventhemwhathehadpromised,whattheyhaddesired:thegainwithoutthegetting。
Thentheybreakout。
\"Whatisittome,\"criesthePainter,\"thatIwaketofindmyselfwearingthegoldmedaloftheSalon,robbedofthememoryofallbywhichitwasearned?\"
TheStrangerpointsouttohimthatheisillogical;suchmemorieswouldhaveincludedlongvistasofmeagredinnersindingyrestaurants,ofatticstudios,ofalifethechiefpartofwhichhadbeenpassedamiduglysurroundings。Itwastoescapefromallsuchthathehadclamoured。ThePoetissilent。
\"Iaskedbutforrecognition,\"criestheMusician,\"thatmenmightlistentome;notformymusictobetakenfrommeinexchangefortherecompenseofasuccessfultradesman。Myinspirationisburntout;Ifeelit。Themusicthatoncefilledmysoulismute。\"
\"Itwasbornofthestrifeandanguish,\"theStrangertellshim,\"ofthelovesthatdied,ofthehopesthatfaded,ofthebeatingofyouth’swingsagainstthebarsofsorrow,ofthegloryandmadnessandtormentcalledLife,ofthestruggleyoushrankfromfacing。\"
ThePoettakesupthetale。
\"YouhaverobbedusofLife,\"hecries。\"Youtellusofdeadlipswhosekisseswehaveneverfelt,ofsongsofvictorysungtoourdeafears。Youhavetakenourfires,youhaveleftusbuttheashes。\"
\"Thefiresthatscorchandsear,\"theStrangeradds,\"thelipsthatcriedintheirpain,thevictoryboughtofwounds。\"
\"Itisnotyettoolate,\"theStrangertellsthem。\"Allthiscanbebutatroubleddream,growingfainterwitheachwakingmoment。WillyoubuybackyourYouthatthecostofease?WillyoubuybackLifeatthepriceoftears?\"
Theycrywithonevoice,\"GiveusbackourYouthwithitsburdens,andahearttobearthem!GiveusbackLifewithitsmingledbitterandsweet!\"
ThensuddenlytheStrangerstandsrevealedbeforethem。TheyseethatheisLife——Lifebornofbattle,Lifemadestrongbyendeavour,Lifelearningsongfromsuffering。
Therefollowsmoretalk;whichstruckme,whenIreadthestory,asamistake;forallthathetellsthemtheyhavenowlearnt:thatlifetobeenjoyedmustbelived;thatvictorytobesweetmustbewon。
TheyawakeinthedingycafeintheRueSt。Louis。Theancientwaiterispilingupthechairspreparatorytoclosingtheshutters。
ThePoetdrawsforthhissmallhandfulofcoins;askswhatistopay。
\"Nothing,\"thewaiteranswers。Astrangerwhosatwiththemandtalkedawhilebeforetheyfellasleephaspaidthebill。Theylookatoneanother,butnoonespeaks。
Thestreetsareempty。Athinrainisfalling。Theyturnupthecollarsoftheircoats;strikeoutintothenight。Andastheirfootstepsechoontheglisteningpavementitcomestoeachofthemthattheyarewalkingwithanew,bravestep。
IfeelsosorryforDick——forthetensofthousandsofhappy,healthy,cared—forladsofwhomDickisthetype。Theremustbemillionsofyoungstersintheworldwhohaveneverknownhunger,exceptasanappetisertotheirdinner;whohaveneverfeltwhatitwastobetired,withouttheknowledgethatacomfortablebedwasawaitingthem。
Tothewell—to—domanorwomanlifeisoneperpetualnursery。Theyarewakenedinthemorning——nottooearly,nottillthenurseryhasbeensweptoutandmadeready,andthefirelighted——awakenedgentlywithacupofteatogivethemstrengthandcourageforthisgreatbusinessofgettingup——awakenedwithwhisperedwords,lestanysuddenstartshouldmaketheirlittleheadsache——theblindscarefullyarrangedtoexcludethenaughtysun,whichotherwisemightshineintotheirlittleeyesandmakethemfretful。Thewater,withthenastychilloff,isputreadyforthem;theywashtheirlittlehandsandfaces,allbythemselves!Thentheyareshavedandhavetheirhairdone;theirlittlehandsaremanicured,theirlittlecornscutforthem。Whentheyareneatandclean,theytoddleintobreakfast;theyareshownintotheirlittlechairs,theirlittlenapkinshandedtothem;thenicefoodthatissogoodforthemisputupontheirlittleplates;thedrinkispouredoutforthemintotheircups。Iftheywanttoplay,thereisthedaynursery。Theyhaveonlytotellkindnursewhatgameitistheyfancy。Thetoysareatoncebroughtout。Thelittlegunisputintotheirhand;thelittlehorseisdraggedforthfromitscorner,theirlittlefeetcarefullyplacedinthestirrups。Thelittleballandbatistakenfromitsbox。
Ortheywilltaketheair,asthewisedoctorhasordered。Thelittlecarriagewillbereadyinfiveminutes;thenicewarmcloakisbuttonedroundthem,thefootstoolplacedbeneaththeirfeet,thecushionattheirback。
Thedayisdone。Thegameshavebeenplayed;thetoyshavebeentakenfromtheirtiredhands,putbackintothecupboard。Thefoodthatissogoodforthem,thatmakesthemstronglittlemenandwomen,hasallbeeneaten。TheyhavebeendressedforgoingoutintotheprettyPark,undressedanddressedagainforgoingouttoteawiththelittleboysandgirlsnextdoor;undressedanddressedagainfortheparty。Theyhavereadtheirlittlebook?haveseenalittleplay,havelookedatprettypictures。Thekindgentlemanwiththelonghairhasplayedthepianotothem。Theyhavedanced。Theirlittlefeetarereallyquitetired。Thefootmanbringsthemhome。
Theyareputintotheirlittlenighties。Thecandleisblownout,thenurserydoorissoftlyclosed。
Nowandagainsomerestlesslittleman,wearyingofthesmugnursery,willrunoutpastthegardengate,anddownthelongwhiteroad;willfindtheNorthPoleor,failingthat,theSouthPole,orwheretheNilerises,orhowitfeelstofly;willclimbtheMountainsoftheMoon——doanything,goanywhere,toescapefromNurseCivilisation’severlastingapronstrings。
Orsomequeerlittlewoman,wonderingwherethepeoplecomefrom,willrunandruntillshecomestothegreattown,watchinwonderthestrangefolkthatsweatandgroan——thepeacefulnursery,withthetoys,theprettyfrocksneverquitethesameagaintoher。
Buttothenineteen—twentiethsofthewell—to—dotheworldbeyondthenurseryisanunknownland。Terriblethingsoccurouttheretolittlemenandwomenwhohavenoprettynurserytolivein。Peoplepushandshoveyouabout,willeventreadonyourtoesifyouarenotcareful。Outthereisnokind,strongNurseBank—Balancetoholdone’slittlehand,andseethatnoharmcomestoone。Outthere,onehastofightone’sownbattles。Oftenoneiscoldandhungry,outthere。
Onehastofendforoneself,outthere;earnone’sdinnerbeforeoneeatsit,neverquitesureoftheweekafternext。Terriblethingstakeplace,outthere:strainandcontestandfierceendeavour;thewaysarefullofdangersandsurprises;folkgoup,folkgodown;youhavetosetyourteethandfight。Well—to—dolittlemenandwomenshudder。Drawdownthenurseryblinds。
Robinahadalittledog。Itledtheusualdog’slife:sleptinabasketonaneiderdowncushion,shelteredfromanychancedraughtbysilkcurtains;itsmilkwarmedandsweetened;itscosychairreservedforit,inwinter,nearthefire;insummer,wherethesunmightreachit;itsthreemealsadaythatagourmetmighthaveeatengladly;itsveryfleastakenoffitshands。
Andtwiceayearstillextracarewasneeded,lestitshouldwantonlyflingasideitsdaysandnightsofluxuriousease,claimitssmallshareofthepassionandpainthatgotothemakingofdogsandmen。
Fortwiceayeartherecameawind,saltwiththebrineofearth’sceaselesstides,whisperingtoitofawondrouslandwhosesharpeststonesaresweeterthanthesilkencushionsofalltheworldwithout。
Onewinter’snighttherewasgreatcommotion。Babettewasnowheretobefound。Wewerelivinginthecountry,milesawayfromeverywhere。
\"Babette,Babette,\"criedpoorfrenziedRobina;andforanswercameonlythelaughterofthewind,pausinginhisgameofrompswiththesnow—flakes。
NextmorninganoldwomanfromthetownfourmilesawaybroughtbackBabetteattheendofastring。Oh,suchasoaked,bedraggledBabette!Theoldwomanhadfoundhercrouchinginadoorway,abewilderedlittleheapofpalpitatingfemininity;and,readingtheaddressuponhercollar,andmaybescentinganotimpossiblereward,hadthoughtshemightaswellearnitforherself。
Robinawasshocked,disgusted。TothinkthatBabette——dainty,petted,spoiltBabette——shouldhavechosenofherownaccordtogodownintothemudanddarknessofthevulgartown;toleavehercurtainedeiderdowntotrampthestreetslikeanydrab!Robina,towhomBabettehadhithertobeentheidealdog,movedawaytohidehertearsofvexation。Theolddamesmiled。Shehadbornehergoodmaneleven,soshetoldus。Ithadbeenahardstruggle,andsomehadgonedown,andsomeweredead;butsome,thankGod,weredoingwell。
Theolddamewishedusgoodday;butassheturnedtogoanimpulseseizedher。ShecrossedtowhereBabette,ashamed,yethalfdefiant,satawet,woefullittleimageonthehearthrug,stoopedandliftedthelittlecreatureinherthin,wornarms。
\"It’stroubleyou’vebroughtyourself,\"saidtheolddame。\"Youcouldn’thelpit,couldyou?\"
Babette’slittlepinktonguestoleout。
\"Weunderstand,weknow——weMothers,\"theyseemedtobesayingtooneanother。
Andsothetwokissed。
Ithinktheterracewillbemyfavouritespot。Ethelberthathinks,too,thatonsunnydaysshewillliketositthere。Fromit,throughanopeningIhavemadeinthetrees,Icanseethecottagejustamileawayattheedgeofthewood。YoungButetellsmeitistheveryplacehehasbeenlookingfor。Mostofhistime,ofcourse,hehastopassintown,buthisFridaystoMondayshelikestospendinthecountry。MaybeIshallhanditovertohim。St。Leonard’schimneyswecanalsoseeabovethetrees。Dicktellsmehehasquitemadeuphismindtobecomeafarmer。Hethinksitwouldbeagoodplan,forabeginning,togointopartnershipwithSt。Leonard。ItisnotunlikelythatSt。Leonard’srestlesstemperamentmayprompthimeventuallytotireoffarming。HehasabrotherinCanadadoingwellinthelumberbusiness,andSt。Leonardoftentalksoftheadvantagesofthecoloniestoamanwhoisbringingupalargefamily。Ishallbesorrytolosehimasaneighbour;thoughIseetheadvantages,undercertainpossibilities,ofMrs。St。Leonard’saddressbeingManitoba。
Veronicaalsothinkstheterracemaycometobeherfavouriteresting—place。
\"Isuppose,\"saidVeronica,\"thatifanythingwastohappentoRobina,everythingwouldfallonme。\"
\"Itwouldbeachange,Veronica,\"Isuggested。\"Hithertoitisyouwhohavedonemostofthefalling。\"
\"SupposeI’vegottoseeaboutgrowingup,\"saidVeronica。