Robinatalkedforabouttenminutes。BythetimeshehaddoneshehadpersuadedDickthatlifeinthebackwoodsofCanadahadbeenhisdreamfrominfancy。Sheisthatsortofgirl。
Itriedtalkingreason,buttalkingtoRobinwhenshehasgotanotioninherheadisliketryingtofixahalteronatwo—year—oldcolt。Thistumble—down,six—roomedcottagewastobethesavingofthefamily。AnecstaticlooktransfiguredRobina’sfaceevenasshespokeofit。Youmighthavefancieditashrine。Robinawoulddothecooking。Robinawouldriseearlyandmilkthecow,andgatherthemorningegg。Wewouldleadthesimplelife,learntofendforourselves。ItwouldbesogoodforVeronica。Thehighereducationcouldwait;letthehigheridealshaveachance。Veronicawouldmakethebeds,dusttherooms。IntheeveningVeronica,herlittlebasketbyherside,wouldsitandsewwhileItalked,tellingthemthings,andRobinamovedsoftlytoandfroaboutherwork,thehouseholdfairy。TheLittleMother,wheneverstrongenough,wouldcometous。
Wewouldhoverroundher,tendingherwithlovinghands。TheEnglishfarmermustknowsomething,inspiteofallthatissaid。Dickcouldarrangeforlessonsinpracticalfarming。Shedidnotsayitcrudely;buthintedthat,surroundedbyexample,evenImightcometotakeaninterestinhonestlabour,mightendbylearningtodosomethinguseful。
Robinatalked,Ishouldsay,foraquarterofanhour。Bythetimeshehaddone,itappearedtomeratherabeautifulidea。Dick’svacationhadjustcommenced。Forthenextthreemonthstherewouldbenothingelseforhimtodobut——toemployhisownexpressivephrase——\"rotround。\"Inanyevent,itwouldbekeepinghimoutofmischief。Veronica’sgovernesswasleaving。Veronica’sgovernessgenerallydoesleaveattheendofaboutayear。Ithinksometimesofadvertisingforaladywithoutaconscience。Attheendofayear,theyexplaintomethattheirconsciencewillnotallowthemtoremainlonger;theydonotfeeltheyareearningtheirsalary。Itisnotthatthechildisnotadearchild,itisnotthatsheisstupid。
Simplyitis——asaGermanladytowhomDickhadbeengivingwhathecalledfinishinglessonsinEnglish,onceputit——thatshedoesnotseemtobe\"takingany。\"Hermother’sideaisthatitis\"sinkingin。\"PerhapsifweallowedVeronicatoliefallowforawhile,somethingmightshowitself。Robina,speakingforherself,heldthataperiodofquietusefulness,awayfromthesocietyofothersillygirlsandsillierboys,wouldresultinherbecomingasensiblewoman。ItisnotoftenthatRobina’syearningstakethisdirection:
tothwartthem,whentheydid,seemedwrong。
WehadsomedifficultywiththeLittleMother。Thatthesethreebabiesofherswilleverbemenandwomencapableofrunningasix—
roomedcottageappearstotheLittleMotherinthelightofafantasticdream。IexplainedtoherthatIshouldbethere,atalleventsfortwoorthreedaysineveryweek,togiveaneyetothings。
Eventhatdidnotcontenther。ShegavewayeventuallyonRobina’ssolemnundertakingthatsheshouldbetelegraphedforthefirsttimeVeronicacoughed。
OnMondaywepackedaone—horsevanwithwhatwedeemedessential。
DickandRobinarodetheirbicycles。Veronica,supportedbyassortedbedding,madeherselfcomfortableuponthetailboard。IfolloweddownbytrainontheWednesdayafternoon。
CHAPTERIII
Itwasthecowthatwokemethefirstmorning。Ididnotknowitwasourcow——notatthetime。Ididn’tknowwehadacow。Ilookedatmywatch;itwashalf—pasttwo。Ithoughtmaybeshewouldgotosleepagain,butherideawasthatthedayhadbegun。Iwenttothewindow,themoonwasatthefull。Shewasstandingbythegate,herheadinsidethegarden;Itookitheranxietywaslestwemightmissanyofit。Herneckwasstretchedoutstraight,hereyestowardsthesky;whichgavetohertheappearanceofalong—earedalligator。I
haveneverhadmuchtodowithcows。Idon’tknowhowyoutalktothem。Itoldherto\"bequiet,\"andto\"liedown\";andmadepretencetothrowabootather。Itseemedtocheerher,havinganaudience;
sheaddedhalfadozenextranotes。Ineverknewbeforeacowhadsomuchinher。Thereisathingonesometimesmeetswithinthesuburbs——oroneusedto;Idonotknowwhetheritisstillextant,butwhenIwasaboyitwasquitecommon。Ithasahurdy—gurdyfixedtoitswaistandadrumstrappedonbehind,arowofpipeshangingfromitsface,andbellsandclappersfrommostofitsotherjoints。
Itplaysthemallatonce,andsmiles。Thiscowremindedmeofit——
withorganeffectsadded。Shedidn’tsmile;therewasthattobesaidinherfavour。
IhopedthatifImadebelievetobeasleepshewouldgetdiscouraged。SoIclosedthewindowostentatiously,andwentbacktobed。Butitonlyhadtheeffectofputtingheronhermettle。\"Hedidnotcareforthatlast,\"Iimaginedhersayingtoherself,\"I
wasn’tatmybest。Therewasn’tfeelingenoughinit。\"Shekeptitupforabouthalfanhour,andthenthegateagainstwhich,I
suppose,shehadbeenleaning,gavewaywithacrash。Thatfrightenedher,andIheardhergallopoffacrossthefield。Iwasonthepointofdozingoffagainwhenapairofpigeonssettledonthewindow—sillandbegantocoo。Itisaprettysoundwhenyouareinthemoodforit。Iwroteapoemonce——asimplething,butinstinctwithlonging——whilesittingunderatreeandlisteningtothecooingofapigeon。Butthatwasintheafternoon。Myonlylongingnowwasforagun。ThreetimesIgotoutofbedand\"shoo’d\"
themaway。ThethirdtimeIremainedbythewindowtillIhadgotitfirmlyintotheirheadsthatIreallydidnotwantthem。Mybehaviourontheformertwooccasionstheyhadevidentlyjudgedtobemereplayfulness。Ihadjustgotbacktobedagainwhenanowlbegantoscreech。ThatisanothersoundIusedtothinkattractive——soweird,somysterious。ItisSwinburne,Ithink,whosaysthatyounevergetthedesiredoneandthetimeandtheplaceallrighttogether。Ifthebelovedoneiswithyou,itisthewrongplaceoratthewrongtime;andifthetimeandtheplacehappentoberight,thenitisthepartythatiswrong。Theowlwasallright:Ilikeowls。Theplacewasallright。Hehadstruckthewrongtime,thatwasall。Eleveno’clockatnight,whenyoucan’tseehim,andnaturallyfeelthatyouwantto,isthepropertimeforanowl。
Perchedontheroofofacow—shedintheearlydawnhelookssilly。
Heclungthere,flappinghiswingsandscreechingatthetopofhisvoice。WhatitwashewantedIamsureIdon’tknow;andanyhowitdidn’tseemthewaytogetit。Hecametothisconclusionhimselfattheendoftwentyminutes,andshuthimselfupandwenthome。I
thoughtIwasgoingtohaveatlastsomepeace,whenacorncrake——acreatureuponwhomNaturehasbestowedasongliketothetearingofcalico—sheetsmingledwiththesharpeningofsaws——settledsomewhereinthegardenandsettoworktopraiseitsMakeraccordingtoitslights。Ihaveafriend,apoet,wholivesjustofftheStrand,andspendshiseveningsattheGarrickClub。Hewritesoccasionalversefortheeveningpapers,andtalksaboutthe\"silentcountry,drowsywiththeweightoflanguors。\"OneofthesetimesI’lllurehimdownforaSaturdaytoMondayandlethimfindoutwhatthecountryreallyis——lethimhearit。Heisbecomingtoomuchofadreamer:itwilldohimgood,wakehimupabit。Thecorncrakeafterawhilestoppedquitesuddenlywithajerk,andforquitefiveminutestherewassilence。
\"Ifthiscontinuesforanotherfive,\"Isaidtomyself,\"I’llbeasleep。\"Ifeltitcomingoverme。Ihadhardlymurmuredthewordswhenthecowturnedupagain。Ishouldsayshehadbeensomewhereandhadhadadrink。Shewasinbettervoicethanever。
Itoccurredtomethatthiswouldbeanopportunitytomakeafewnotesonthesunrise。Theliterarymanislookedtoforoccasionaldescriptionofthesunrise。Theearnestreaderwhohasheardaboutthissunrisethirstsforfullparticulars。Myself,forpurposesofobservation,IhavegenerallychosenDecemberortheearlypartofJanuary。Butoneneverknows。MaybeoneofthesedaysI’llwantasummersunrise,withbirdsanddew—besprinkledflowers:itgoeswellwiththerusticheroine,themiller’sdaughter,orthegirlwhobringsupchickensandhasdreams。Imetabrotherauthoronceatseveno’clockinthemorninginKensingtonGardens。HelookedhalfasleepandsodisagreeablethatIhesitatedforawhiletospeaktohim:heisamanthatasarulebreakfastsateleven。ButI
summonedmycourageandaccostedhim。
\"Thisisearlyforyou,\"Isaid。
\"It’searlyforanyonebutabornfool,\"heanswered。
\"What’sthematter?\"Iasked。\"Can’tyousleep?\"
\"Can’tIsleep?\"heretortedindignantly。\"Why,Idaren’tsitdownuponaseat,Idaren’tleanupagainstatree。IfIdidI’dbeasleepinhalfasecond。\"
\"What’stheidea?\"Ipersisted。\"BeenreadingSmiles’s’SelfHelpandtheSecretofSuccess’?Don’tbeabsurd,\"Iadvisedhim。
\"You’llbegoingtoSundayschoolnextandkeepingadiary。Youhaveleftittoolate:wedon’treformatforty。Gohomeandgotobed。\"
Icouldseehewasdoinghimselfnogood。
\"I’mgoingtobed,\"heanswered,\"I’mgoingtobedforamonthwhenI’vefinishedthisconfoundednovelthatI’mon。Takemyadvice,\"hesaid——helaidhishanduponmyshoulder——\"Neverchooseacolonialgirlforyourheroine。Atourageitissimplemadness。\"
\"She’safinegirl,\"hecontinued,\"andgood。Hasaheartofgold。
She’swearingmetoashadow。Iwantedsomethingfreshandunconventional。Ididn’tgraspwhatitwasgoingtodo。She’sthegirlthatgetsupearlyinthemorningandridesbare—back——thehorse,Imean,ofcourse;don’tbesosilly。OverinNewSouthWalesitdidn’tmatter。Ithrewintheusuallocalcolour——theeucalyptus—
treeandthekangaroo——andletherride。ItisnowthatsheisoverhereinLondonthatIwishIhadneverthoughtofher。Shegetsupatfiveandwandersaboutthesilentcity。Thatmeans,ofcourse,thatIhavetogetupatfiveinordertorecordherimpressions。I
havewalkedsixmilesthismorning。FirsttoSt。Paul’sCathedral;
shelikesitwhenthere’snobodyabout。You’dthinkitwasn’tbigenoughforhertoseeifanybodyelsewasinthestreet。Shethinksofitasofamotherwatchingoverhersleepingchildren;she’sfullofallthatsortofthing。AndfromtheretoWestminsterBridge。
ShesitsontheparapetandreadsWordsworth,tillthepolicemanturnsheroff。Thisisanotherofherfavouritespots。\"Heindicatedwithalookofconcentrateddisgusttheavenuewherewewerestanding。\"Thisiswhereshelikestofinishup。Shecomesheretolistentoablackbird。\"
\"Well,youarethroughwithitnow,\"Isaidtoconsolehim。\"You’vedoneit;andit’sover。\"
\"Throughwithit!\"helaughedbitterly。\"I’mjustbeginningit。
There’stheentireEastEndtobedoneyet:she’sgottomeetafellowthereasbigacrankasherself。Andwalkingisn’ttheworst。
She’sgoingtohaveahorse;youcanguesswhatthatmeans。——HydeParkwillbenogoodtoher。She’llfindoutRichmondandHamCommon。I’vegottodescribethesceneryandthemadjoyofthething。\"
\"Can’tyouimagineit?\"Isuggested。
\"I’mgoingtoimaginealltheenjoyablepartofit,\"heanswered。\"I
musthaveagroundworktogoupon。She’sgottohavefeelingscometoheruponthishorse。Youcan’tenterintoarider’sfeelingswhenyou’vealmostforgottenwhichsideofthehorseyougetup。\"
IwalkedwithhimtotheSerpentine。Ihadbeenwonderinghowitwashehadgrownstoutsosuddenly。Hehadabathtowelroundhimunderneathhiscoat。
\"It’llgivememydeathofcold,Iknowitwill,\"hechatteredwhileunlacinghisboots。
\"Can’tyouleaveittillthesummer—time,\"Isuggested,\"andtakehertoOstend?\"
\"Itwouldn’tbeunconventional,\"hegrowled。\"Shewouldn’ttakeaninterestinit。\"
\"ButdotheyallowladiestobatheintheSerpentine?\"Ipersisted。
\"Itwon’tbetheSerpentine,\"heexplained。\"It’sgoingtobetheThamesatGreenwich。Butitmustbethesamesortoffeeling。She’sgottotellthemallaboutitduringalunchinQueen’sGate,andshockthemall。That’sallshedoesitfor,inmyopinion。\"
Heemergedamottledblue。Ihelpedhimintohisclothes,andhewasfortunateenoughtofindanearlycab。ThebookappearedatChristmas。Thecriticsagreedthattheheroinewasadelightfulcreation。Someofthemsaidtheywouldliketohaveknownher。
Rememberingmypoorfriend,itoccurredtomethatbygoingoutnowandmakingafewnotesaboutthemorning,Imightbesavingmyselftroublelateron。Islippedonafewthings——nothingelaborate——putanotebookinmypocket,openedthedoorandwentdown。
Perhapsitwouldbemorecorrecttosay\"openedthedoorandwasdown。\"Itwasmyownfault,Iadmit。Wehadtalkedthisthingoverbeforegoingtobed,andImyselfhadimpresseduponVeronicatheneedforcaution。Thearchitectofthecountrycottagedoesnotwastespace。Hedispenseswithlandings;thebedroomdooropensontothetopstair。Itdoesnotdotowalkoutofyourbedroom,forthereasonthereisnothingoutsidetowalkon。IhadsaidtoVeronica,pointingoutthisfacttoher:
\"Nowdon’t,inthemorning,comeburstingoutoftheroominyourusualvolcanicstyle,becauseifyoudotherewillbetrouble。Asyouperceive,thereisnolanding。Thestairscommenceatonce;theyaresteep,andtheyleaddowntoabrickfloor。Openthedoorquietly,lookwhereyouaregoing,andstepcarefully。\"
Dickhadaddedhisadvicetomine。\"Ididthatmyselfthefirstmorning,\"Dickhadsaid。\"Isteppedstraightoutofthebedroomintothekitchen;andIcantellyou,ithurts。Youbecareful,young’un。Thiscottagedoesn’tlenditselftodash。\"
Robinahadfallendownwithatrayinherhand。Shesaidthatnevershouldsheforgetthehorrorofthatmoment,when,sittingonthekitchenfloor,shehadcriedtoDick——herownvoicesoundingtoherasifitcamefromsomewherequitefaroff:\"Isitbroken?Tellmethetruth。Isitbrokenanywhere?\"andDickhadreplied:\"Broken!
why,it’ssmashedtoatoms。Whatdidyouexpect?\"Robinahadaskedthequestionwithreferencetoherhead,whileDickhadthoughtshewasalludingtotheteapot。Inthatmoment,hadsaidRobina,herwholelifehadpassedbeforeher。SheletVeronicafeelthebump。
Veronicawasdisappointedwiththebump,havingexpectedsomethingbigger,buthadpromisedtobecareful。Wehadallagreedthatifinspiteofourwarningssheforgot,andcameblunderingdowninthemorning,itwouldserveherright。Itwasthinkingofallthisthat,asIlayuponthefloor,mademefeelangrywitheverybody。Ihatepeoplewhocansleepthroughnoisesthatwakemeup。WhywasItheonlypersoninthehousetobedisturbed?Dick’sroomwasroundthecorner;therewassomeexcuseforhim。ButRobinaandVeronica’swindowlookedstraightdownuponthecow。IfRobinaandVeronicawerenotacoupleoflogs,thecowwouldhavearousedthem。Weshouldhavediscussedthematterwiththedoorajar。Robinawouldhavesaid,\"Whateveryoudo,becarefulofthestairs,Pa,\"andI
shouldhaveremembered。Themodernchildappearstometohavenofeelingforitsparent。
Ipickedmyselfupandstartedforthedoor。Thecowcontinuedbellowingsteadily。Mywholeanxietywastogettoherquicklyandtohither。ButthedoortookmorefindingthanIcouldhavebelievedpossible。Theshutterswereclosedandthewholeplacewasinpitchdarkness。Theideahadbeentofurnishthiscottageonlywiththingsthatwereabsolutelynecessary,buttheroomappearedtometobeovercrowded。Therewasamilking—stool,whichisathingmadepurposelyheavysothatitmaynotbeeasilyupset。IfI
tumbledoveritonceItumbledoveritadozentimes。Igotholdofitatlastandcarrieditaboutwithme。IthoughtIwoulduseittohitthecow——thatis,whenIhadfoundthefront—door。Iknewitledoutoftheparlour,butcouldnotrecollectitsexactposition。I
arguedthatifIkeptalongthewallIshouldbeboundtocometoit。
Ifoundthewall,andsetofffullofhope。Isupposetheexplanationwasthat,withoutknowingit,Imusthavestartedwiththedoor,notthefront—door,theotherdoor,leadingintothekitchen。Icreptalong,carefullyfeelingmyway,andstruckquitenewthingsaltogether——thingsIhadnorecollectionofandthathitmeinfreshplaces。IclimbedoverwhatIpresumedtobeabeer—
barrelandlandedamongbottles;thereweredozensupondozensofthem。TogetawayfromthesebottlesIhadtoleavethewall;butI
founditagain,asIthought,andIfeltalongitforanotherhalfadozenyardsorsoandthencameagainuponbottles:theroomappearedtobepavedwithbottles。AlittlefartheronIrolledoveranotherbeer—barrel:asamatteroffactitwasthesamebeer—
barrel,butIdidnotknowthis。AtthetimeitseemedtomethatRobinahadmadeuphermindtorunapublic—house。Ifoundthemilking—stoolagainandstartedafresh,andbeforeIhadgoneadozenstepswasinamongbottlesagain。Lateron,inthebroaddaylight,itwaseasyenoughtounderstandwhathadhappened。Ihadbeencarefullyfeelingmywayroundandroundascreen。Igotsosickofthesebottlesandsotiredofrollingovertheseeverlastingbeer—
barrels,thatIabandonedthewallandplungedboldlyintospace。
Ihadbarelystarted,when,lookingup,Isawtheskyaboveme:astarwastwinklingjustabovemyhead。HadIbeenwideawake,andhadthecowstoppedbellowingforjustoneminute,IshouldhaveguessedthatsomehoworanotherIhadgotintoachimney。Butasthingswere,thewonderandthemysteryofitallappalledme。
\"Alice’sAdventuresinWonderland\"wouldhaveappearedtome,atthatmoment,inthenatureofaguidetotravellers。Hadarocking—horseoralobstersuddenlyappearedtomeIshouldhavesatandtalkedtoit;andifithadnotansweredmeIshouldhavethoughtitsulkyandbeenhurt。Itookastepforwardandthestardisappeared,justasifsomebodyhadblownitout。Iwasnotsurprisedintheleast。I
wasexpectinganythingtohappen。
Ifoundadooranditopenedquiteeasily。Awoodwasinfrontofme。Icouldn’tseeanycowanywhere,butIstillheardher。Itallseemedquitenatural。Iwouldwanderintothewood;mostlikelyI
shouldmeetherthere,andshewouldbesmokingapipe。Inallprobabilityshewouldknowsomepoetry。
Withthefreshairmysensesgraduallycamebacktome,andIbegantounderstandwhyitwasIcouldnotseethecow。Thereasonwasthatthehousewasbetweenus。BysomemysteriousprocessIhadbeendischargedintothebackgarden。Istillhadthemilking—stoolinmyhand,butthecownolongertroubledme。LetherseeifshecouldwakeVeronicabymerelybellowingoutsidethedoor;itwasmorethanIhadeverbeenabletodo。
Isatdownonthestoolandopenedmynote—book。Iheadedthepage:
\"SunriseinJuly:observationsandemotions,\"andIwrotedownatonce,lestIshouldforgetit,thattowardsthreeo’clockafaintlightisdiscernible,andaddedthatthislightgetsstrongerasthetimegoeson。
Itsoundedfootlingeventomyself,butIhadbeenreadinganoveloftherealisticschoolthathadbeengreatlypraisedforitsactuality。
Thereisademandinsomequartersforthisclassofobservation。I
likewisemadeanotethatthepigeonandthecorncrakeappeartobeamongtheearliestofNature’schildrentowelcomethecomingday;
andaddedthatthescreech—owlmaybeheard,perhapsatitsbest,byanyonecaringtoriseforthepurpose,somequarterofanhourbeforethedawn。ThatwasallIcouldthinkofjustthen。Asregardsemotions,Ididnotseemtohaveany。
Ilitapipeandwaitedforthesun。Theskyinfrontofmewastingedwithafaintpink。Everymomentitflushedadeeperred。I
maintainthatanyone,notanexpert,wouldhavesaidthatwastheportionofthehorizononwhichtokeepone’seye。Ikeptmyeyeuponit,butnosunappeared。Ilitanotherpipe。Theskyinfrontofmewasnowablazeofglory。Iscribbledafewlines,likeningthescatteredcloudstobridesblushingattheapproachofthebridegroom。Thatwouldhavebeenallrightiflaterontheyhadn’tbeguntoturngreen:itseemedthewrongcolourforabride。Lateronstilltheywentyellow,andthatspoiltthesimilepasthope。Onecannotwaxpoeticalaboutabridewhoattheapproachofthebridegroomturnsfirstgreenandthenyellow:youcanonlyfeelsorryforher。Iwaitedsomemore。Theskyinfrontofmegrewpalereverymoment。Ibegantofearthatsomethinghadhappenedtothatsun。IfIhadn’tknownsomuchastronomyIshouldhavesaidthathehadchangedhismindandhadgonebackagain。Irosewiththeideaofseeingintothings。Hehadbeenupapparentlyforhours:
hehadgotupatthebackofme。Itseemedtobenobody’sfault。I
putmypipeintomypocketandstrolledroundtothefront。Thecowwasstillthere;shewaspleasedtoseeme,andstartedbellowingagain。
Iheardasoundofwhistling。Itproceededfromafarmer’sboy。I
hailedhim,andheclimbedagateandcametomeacrossthefield。
Hewasacheerfulyouth。Henoddedtothecowandhopedshehadhadagoodnight:hepronouncedit\"nihet。\"
\"Youknowthecow?\"Isaid。
\"Well,\"heexplained,\"wedon’tpreciselymoveinthesimeset。Sorto’businessrelytionshipmorelike——ifyouunderstandme?\"
Somethingaboutthisboywasworryingme。Hedidnotseemlikearealfarmer’sboy。Butthennothingseemedquiterealthismorning。
Myfeelingwastoletthingsgo。
\"Whosecowisit?\"Iasked。
Hestaredatme。
\"Iwanttoknowtowhomitbelongs,\"Isaid。\"Iwanttorestoreittohim。\"
\"Excuseme,\"saidtheboy,\"butwheredoyoulive?\"
Hewasmakingmecross。\"WheredoIlive?\"Iretorted。\"Why,inthiscottage。Youdon’tthinkI’vegotupearlyandcomefromadistancetolistentothiscow?Don’ttalksomuch。Doyouknowwhosecowitis,ordon’tyou?\"
\"It’syourcow,\"saidtheboy。
Itwasmyturntostare。
\"ButIhaven’tgotacow,\"Itoldhim。
\"Yusyouhave,\"hepersisted;\"you’vegotthatcow。\"
Shehadstoppedbellowingforamoment。ShewasnotthecowIfeltI
couldevertakeapridein。Atsometimeoranother,quiterecently,shemusthavesatdowninsomemud。
\"HowdidIgether?\"Idemanded。
\"Theyounglydy,\"explainedtheboy,\"shecamerahndtoourpliceonTuesday——\"
Ibegantoseelight。\"Anexcitableyounglady——talksveryfast——
neverwaitsfortheanswer?\"
\"Withjollyfineeyes,\"addedtheboyapprovingly。
\"Andsheorderedacow?\"
\"Didn’tseemto’avestrengthenoughtoliveanotherdywithahtit。\"
\"Anystipulationmadeconcerningthepriceofthecow?\"
\"Anywhat?\"
\"Theyoungladywiththeeyes——didshethinktoaskthepriceofthecow?\"
\"Nosordiddetailswasenteredinto,sofarasIcould’ear,\"repliedtheboy。
Theywouldnothavebeen——byRobina。
\"Anyhintletfallastowhatthecowwaswantedfor?\"
\"Thelydygivesustounderstand,\"saidtheboy,\"thatfreshmilkwas’eridea。\"
Thatsurprisedme:thatwasthoughtfulofRobina。\"Andthisisthecow?\"
\"Itowedherrahndlastnight。Ididn’tknockatthedoorandtellyerabaht’er,cos,tobequitefrankwithyer,therewasn’tanybodyin。\"
\"Whatisshebellowingfor?\"Iasked。
\"Well,\"saidtheboy,\"it’sonlyatheory,o’course,butIshouldsy,fromthelookof’er,thatshewantedtobemilked。\"
\"Butitstartedbellowingathalf—pasttwo,\"Iargued。\"Itdoesn’texpecttobemilkedathalf—pasttwo,doesit?\"
\"Meself,\"saidtheboy,\"I’vegivenuplookingforsenseincows。\"
Insomeunaccountablewaythisboywashypnotisingme。Everythinghadsuddenlybecomeoutofplace。
Thecowhadsuddenlybecomeabsurd:sheoughttohavebeenamilk—
can。Thewoodstruckmeasneglected:thereoughttohavebeennotice—boardsabout,\"KeepofftheGrass,\"\"SmokingStrictlyProhibited\":therewasn’taseattobeseen。Thecottagehadsurelygotitselftherebyaccident:wherewasthestreet?Thebirdswerealloutoftheircages;everythingwasupsidedown。
\"Areyouarealfarmer’sboy?\"Iaskedhim。
\"O’courseIam,\"heanswered。\"Whatdoyertikemefor——ahartistindisguise?\"
Itcametome。\"Whatisyourname?\"
\"’Enery——’Enery’Opkins。\"
\"Wherewereyouborn?\"
\"CamdenTahn。\"
Herewasanicebeginningtoarurallife!WhatplacecouldbethecountrywhilethisboyHopkinswasabout?HewouldhavegiventotheGardenofEdentheatmosphereofanoutlyingsuburb。
\"Doyouwanttoearnanoccasionalshilling?\"Iputittohim。
\"I’dratheritcomereggler,\"saidHopkins。\"Betterformekerrickter。\"
\"YoudropthatCockneyaccentandlearnBerkshire,andI’llgiveyouhalfasovereignwhenyoucantalkit,\"Ipromisedhim。\"Don’t,forinstance,say’ain’t,’\"Iexplainedtohim。\"Say’bain’t。’Don’tsay’Theyounglydy,shecamerahndtoourplice;’say’Themissy,’ercoomeddown;’ercoomed,and’ersestothemaister,’erses……’That’sthesortofthingIwanttosurroundmyselfwithhere。
Whenyouinformedmethatthecowwasmine,youshouldhavesaid:
’Whoi,’erbeyourcow,surelie’erbe。’\"
\"Sureit’sBerkshire?\"demandedHopkins。\"You’reconfidentaboutit?\"Thereisatypethatisbynaturesuspicious。
\"ItmaynotbeBerkshirepureandundefiled,\"Iadmitted。\"Itiswhatinliteratureweterm’dialect。’Itdoesformostplacesoutsidethetwelve—mileradius。Theobjectistoconveyafeelingofrusticsimplicity。Anyhow,itisn’tCamdenTown。\"
Istartedhimwithashillingthenandtheretoencouragehim。Hepromisedtocomeroundintheeveningforoneortwobooks,writtenbyfriendsofmine,thatIreckonedwouldbeofhelptohim;andI
returnedtothecottageandsettoworktorouseRobina。Hertonewasapologetic。ShehadgotthenotionintoherheadthatIhadbeencallingherforquitealongtime。Iexplainedthatthiswasnotthecase。
\"Howfunny!\"sheanswered。\"IsaidtoVeronicamorethananhourago:’I’msurethat’sPacallingus。’IsupposeImusthavebeendreaming。\"
\"Well,don’tdreamanymore,\"Isuggested。\"Comedownandseetothisconfoundedcowofyours。\"
\"Oh,\"saidVeronica,\"hasitcome?\"
\"Ithascome,\"Itoldher。\"Asamatteroffact,ithasbeenheresometime。Itoughttohavebeenmilkedfourhoursago,accordingtoitsownidea。\"
Robinasaidshewouldbedowninaminute。
Shewasdownintwenty—five,whichwassoonerthanIhadexpected。
ShebroughtVeronicawithher。ShesaidshewouldhavebeendownsoonerifshehadnotwaitedforVeronica。ItappearedthatthiswasjustpreciselywhatVeronicahadbeentellingher。Iwasfeelingirritable。Ihadbeenuphalfaday,andhadn’thadmybreakfast。
\"Don’tstandtherearguing,\"Itoldthem。\"Forgoodness’sakelet’sgettoworkandmilkthiscow。Weshallhavethepoorcreaturedyingonourhandsifwe’renotcareful。\"
Robinawaswanderingroundtheroom。
\"Youhaven’tcomeacrossamilking—stoolanywhere,haveyou,Pa?\"
askedRobina。
\"Ihavecomeacrossyourmilking—stool,Iestimate,somethirteentimes,\"Itoldher。IfetcheditfromwhereIhadleftit,andgaveittoher;andwefiledoutinprocession;Veronicawithagalvanisedironbucketbringinguptherear。
Theproblemthatwasforcingitselfuponmymindwas:didRobinaknowhowtomilkacow?Robina,Iargued,theideaonceinhermind,wouldimmediatelyhaveorderedacow,clamouringforit——asHopkinshadpicturesquelyexpressedit——asthoughshehadnotstrengthtoliveanotherdaywithoutacow。Hernextproceedingwouldhavebeentobuyamilking—stool。Itwasatastefulmilking—stool,thisoneshehadselected,ornamentedwiththeroughdrawingofacowinpokerwork:alittletoosolidformytaste,butonethatIshouldsaywouldwearwell。Thepailshehadnotasyethadtimetoseeabout。
Thisgalvanisedbucketwewereusingwas,Itookit,atemporarymakeshift。WhenRobinahadleisureshewouldgointothetownandpurchasesomethingatanartstores。That,tocompletethescheme,shewouldhavedonewelltohavetakenafewpracticallessonsinmilkingwouldcometoher,asaninspiration,withthearrivalofthecow。InoticedthatRobina’sstepsasweapproachedthecowwerelesselastic。JustoutsidethecowRobinahalted。
\"Isuppose,\"saidRobina,\"there’sonlyonewayofmilkingacow?\"
\"Theremaybefancyways,\"Ianswered,\"necessarytoyouiflateronyouthinkofenteringacompetition。Thismorning,seeingwearelate,Ishouldn’tworrytoomuchaboutstyle。IfIwereyou,thismorningIshouldadopttheordinaryunimaginativemethod,andaimonlyatresults。\"
Robinasatdownandplacedherbucketunderneaththecow。
\"Isuppose,\"saidRobina,\"itdoesn’tmatterwhich——whichoneIbeginwith?\"
Itwasperfectlyplainshehadn’ttheleastnotionhowtomilkacow。
Itoldherso,addingcomments。Nowandthenalittlefatherlytalkdoesgood。AsaruleIhavetoworkmyselfupfortheseoccasions。
ThismorningIwasfeelingfairlyfit:thingshadconspiredtothisend。IputbeforeRobinatheaimsandprivilegesofthehouseholdfairyastheyappeared,nottoher,buttome。IalsoconfidedtoVeronicatheresultofmanyweeks’reflectionsconcerningherandherbehaviour。IalsotoldthembothwhatIthoughtaboutDick。Idothissortofthingonceeverysixmonths:ithasanexcellenteffectforaboutthreedays。
Robinawipedawayhertears,andseizedthefirstonethatcametoherhand。Thecow,withoutsayingaword,kickedovertheemptybucket,andwalkedaway,disgustexpressedineveryhairofherbody。
Robina,cryingquietly,followedher。Bypattingheronherneck,andlettingherwipehernoseuponmycoat——whichseemedtocomforther——IpersuadedhertokeepstillwhileRobinaworkedfortenminutesathighpressure。Theresultwasaboutaglassfulandahalf,thecow’scapacity,toallappearance,beingbythistimesomefiveorsixgallons。
Robinabrokedown,andacknowledgedshehadbeenawickedgirl。Ifthecowdied,soshesaid,sheshouldneverforgiveherself。
Veronicaatthisburstintotearsalso;andthecow,whethermovedafreshbyherowntroublesorbytheirs,commencedagaintobellow。
Iwasfortunatelyabletofindanelderlylabourersmokingapipeandeatingbaconunderneathatree;andwithhimIbargainedthatforashillingadayheshouldmilkthecowtillfurthernotice。
Welefthimbusy,andreturnedtothecottage。Dickmetusatthedoorwithacheery\"Goodmorning。\"Hewantedtoknowifwehadheardthestorm。Healsowantedtoknowwhenbreakfastwouldbeready。
Robinathoughtthathappyeventwouldbeshortlyafterhehadboiledthekettleandmadetheteaandfriedthebacon,whileVeronicawaslayingthetable。
\"ButIthought——\"
Robinasaidthatifhedaredtomentiontheword\"household—fairy\"
shewouldboxhisears,andgostraightuptobed,andleaveeverybodytodoeverything。Shesaidshemeantit。
Dickhasonevirtue:itisphilosophy。\"Comeon,young’un,\"saidDicktoVeronica。\"Troubleisgoodforusall。\"
\"Someofus,\"saidVeronica,\"itmakesbitter。\"
Wesatdowntobreakfastateight—thirty。
CHAPTERIV
OurarchitectarrivedonFridayafternoon,orrather,hisassistant。
IfeltfromthefirstIwasgoingtolikehim。Heisshy,andthat,ofcourse,makeshimappearawkward。But,asIexplainedtoRobina,itistheshyyoungmenwho,generallyspeaking,turnoutbest:fewmencouldhavebeenmorepainfullyshyuptotwenty—fivethanmyself。
Robinasaidthatwasdifferent:inthecaseofanauthoritdidnotmatter。Robina’sattitudetowardstheliteraryprofessionwouldnotannoymesomuchwereitnottypical。Tobealiterarymanis,inRobina’sopinion,tobealicensedidiot。ItwasonlyaweekortwoagothatIoverheardfrommystudywindowaconversationbetweenVeronicaandRobinauponthisverypoint。Veronica’seyehadcaughtsomethinglyingonthegrass。Icouldnotmyselfseewhatitwas,inconsequenceofaninterveninglaurelbush。Veronicastoopeddownandexamineditwithcare。Thenextinstant,utteringapiercingwhoop,sheleaptintotheair;then,clappingherhands,begantodance。
Herfacewasradiantwithaholyjoy。Robina,passingnear,stoppedanddemandedexplanation。
\"Pa’stennisracket!\"shoutedVeronica——Veronicaneverseestheuseoftalkinginanordinarytoneofvoicewhenshoutingwilldojustaswell。Shecontinuedclappingherhandsandtakinglittleboundsintotheair。
\"Well,whatareyougoingonlikethatfor?\"askedRobina。\"Ithasn’tbityou,hasit?\"
\"It’sbeenoutallnightinthewet,\"shoutedVeronica。\"Heforgottobringitin。\"
\"Youwickedchild!\"saidRobinaseverely。\"It’snothingtobepleasedabout。\"
\"Yes,itis,\"explainedVeronica。\"Ithoughtatfirstitwasmine。
Oh,wouldn’ttherehavebeenatalkaboutit,ifithadbeen!Ohmy!
wouldn’ttherehavebeenarow!\"Shesettleddowntoasteadyrhythmicdance,suggestiveofaGreekchorusexpressingsatisfactionwiththegods。
Robinaseizedherbytheshouldersandshookherbackintoherself。
\"Ifithadbeenyours,\"saidRobina,\"youwoulddeservetohavebeensenttobed。\"
\"Well,then,whydon’thegotobed?\"arguedVeronica。
Robinatookherbythearmandwalkedherupanddownjustunderneathmywindow。Ilistened,becausetheconversationinterestedme。
\"Pa,asIamalwaysexplainingtoyou,\"saidRobina,\"isaliteraryman。Hecannothelpforgettingthings。\"
\"Well,Ican’thelpforgettingthings,\"insistedVeronica。
\"Youfindithard,\"explainedRobinakindly;\"butifyoukeepontryingyouwillsucceed。Youwillgetmorethoughtful。Iusedtobeforgetfulanddofoolishthingsonce,whenIwasalittlegirl。\"
\"Goodthingforusifwewasallliterary,\"suggestedVeronica。
\"Ifwe’were’allliterary,\"Robinacorrectedher。\"Butyouseewearenot。YouandIandDick,wearejustordinarymortals。Wemusttryandthink,andbesensible。Inthesameway,whenPagetsexcitedandraves——Imean,seemstorave——it’stheliterarytemperament。Hecan’thelpit。\"
\"Can’tyouhelpdoinganythingwhenyouareliterary?\"askedVeronica。
\"There’sagooddealyoucan’thelp,\"answeredRobina。\"Itisn’tfairtojudgethembytheordinarystandard。\"
Theydriftedtowardsthekitchengarden——itwasthetimeofstrawberries——andtheremainderofthetalkIlost。InoticedthatforsomedaysafterwardsVeronicadisplayedatendencytoshuttingherselfupintheschoolroomwithacopybook,andthatleadpencilshadawayofdisappearingfrommydesk。OneinparticularthathadsuitedmeIdeterminedifpossibletorecover。AsubtleinstinctguidedmetoVeronica’ssanctum。Ifoundherthoughtfullysuckingit。Sheexplainedtomethatshewaswritingalittleplay。
\"Yougetthingsfromyourfather,don’tyou?\"sheenquiredofme。
\"Youdo,\"Iadmitted;\"butyououghtnottotakethemwithoutasking。
Iamalwaystellingyouofit。ThatpencilistheonlyoneIcanwritewith。\"
\"Ididn’tmeanthepencil,\"explainedVeronica。\"IwaswonderingifIhadgotyourliterarytemper。\"
Itispuzzling,whenyoucometothinkofit,thisestimateaccordedbythegeneralpublictothelitterateur。Itstandstoreasonthatthemanwhowritesbooks,explainingeverythingandputtingeverybodyright,mustbehimselfanexceptionallycleverman;elsehowcouldhedoit!Thethingispurelogic。YettolistentoRobinaandherlikeyoumightthinkwehadnotsenseenoughtorunourselves,asthesayingis——letalonerunningtheuniverse。IfIwouldlether,Robinawouldsitandgivemeinformationbythehour。
\"Theordinarygirl……\"Robinawillbegin,withtheairofaUniversityExtensionLecturer。
Itissoexasperating。AsifIdidnotknowallthereistobeknownaboutgirls!Why,itismybusiness。IpointthisouttoRobina。
\"Yes,Iknow,\"Robinawillanswersweetly。\"ButIwasmeaningtherealgirl。\"
ItwouldmakenottheslightestdifferencewereIevenquiteahigh—
classliteraryman——RobinathinksIam:sheisadearchild。WereI
Shakespearehimself,andcouldIinconsequencesaytoher:
\"Methinks,child,thecreatorofOpheliaandJuliet,andRosamundandBeatrice,mustsurelyknowsomethingaboutgirls,\"Robinawouldstillmakeanswer:
\"Ofcourse,Padear。Everybodyknowshowcleveryouare。ButIwasthinkingforthemomentofrealgirls。\"
Iwondertomyselfsometimes,Isliteraturetothegeneralreadereveranythingmorethanafairy—tale?Wewritewithourheart’sblood,asweputit。Weaskourconscience,Isitrightthustolaybarethesecretsofoursouls?Thegeneralreaderdoesnotgraspthatwearewritingwithourheart’sblood:tohimitisjustink。
Hedoesnotbelievewearelayingbarethesecretsofoursouls:hetakesitwearejustpretending。\"OnceuponatimetherelivedagirlnamedAngelinawholovedapartybythenameofEdwin。\"Heimagines——he,thegeneralreader——whenwetellhimallthewonderfulthoughtsthatwereinsideAngelina,thatitwaswewhoputthemthere。Hedoesnotknow,hewillnottrytounderstand,thatAngelinaisinrealitymorerealthanisMissJones,whoridesupeverymorninginthe’buswithhim,andhasaprettyknackofrenderingconversationabouttheweathernovelandsuggestive。AsaboyIwonsomepopularityamongmyschoolmatesasatellerofstories。Oneafternoon,toasmallcollectionwithwhomIwashomingacrossRegent’sPark,ItoldthestoryofabeautifulPrincess。ButshewasnottheordinaryPrincess。ShewouldnotbehaveasaPrincessshould。Icouldnothelpit。Theothersheardonlymyvoice,butIwaslisteningtothewind。ShethoughtshelovedthePrince——untilhehadwoundedtheDragonuntodeathandhadcarriedherawayintothewood。Then,whilethePrincelaysleeping,sheheardtheDragoncallingtoherinitspain,andcreptbacktowhereitlaybleeding,andputherarmsaboutitsscalyneckandkissedit;
andthathealedit。Iwashopingmyselfthatatthispointitwouldturnintoaprinceitself,butitdidn’t;itjustremainedadragon——
sothewindsaid。YetthePrincesslovedit:itwasn’thalfabaddragon,whenyouknewit。IcouldnottellthemwhatbecameofthePrince:thewinddidn’tseemtocareahangaboutthePrince。
Myself,Ilikedthestory,butHocker,whowasaFifthFormboy,voicingourlittlepublic,saiditwasrot,sofar,andthatIhadgottohurryupandfinishthingsrightly。
\"Butthatisall,\"Itoldthem。
\"No,itisn’t,\"saidHocker。\"She’sgottomarrythePrinceintheend。He’llhavetokilltheDragonagain;andmindhedoesitproperlythistime。WhoeverheardofaPrincessleavingaPrinceforaDragon!\"
\"Butshewasn’ttheordinarysortofPrincess,\"Iargued。
\"Thenshe’sgottobe,\"criticisedHocker。\"Don’tyougiveyourselfsomanyairs。YoumakehermarrythePrince,andbeslippyaboutit。
I’vegottocatchthefour—fifteenfromChalkFarmstation。\"
\"Butshedidn’t,\"Ipersistedobstinately。\"ShemarriedtheDragonandlivedhappyeverafterwards。\"
Hockeradoptedsternermeasures。Heseizedmyarmandtwisteditbehindme。
\"Shemarriedwho?\"demandedHocker:grammarwasnotHocker’sstrongpoint。
\"TheDragon,\"Igrowled。
\"Shemarriedwho?\"repeatedHocker。
\"TheDragon,\"Iwhined。
\"Shemarriedwho?\"forthethirdtimeurgedHocker。
Hockerwasstrong,andthetearswereforcingthemselvesintomyeyesinspiteofme。SothePrincessinreturnforhealingtheDragonmadeitpromisetoreform。ItwentbackwithhertothePrince,andmadeitselfgenerallyusefultobothofthemfortherestofthetour。AndthePrincetookthePrincesshomewithhimandmarriedher;andtheDragondiedandwasburied。Theotherslikedthestorybetter,butIhatedit;andthewindsighedanddiedaway。
Thelittlecrowdbecomesthereadingpublic,andHockergrowsintoaneditor;hetwistsmyarminotherways。Somearebrave,sothecrowdkicksthemandscurriesofftocatchthefour—fifteen。Butmostofus,Ifear,areslavestoHocker。Then,afterawhile,thewindgrowssulkyandwillnottellusstoriesanymore,andwehavetomakethemupoutofourownheads。Perhapsitisjustaswell。Whatweredoorsandwindowsmadeforbuttokeepoutthewind。
Heisadangerousfellow,thiswanderingWind;heleadsmeastray。I
wastalkingaboutourarchitect。
Hemadeabadstart,sofarasRobinawasconcerned,bycominginattheback—door。Robina,inabigapron,waswashingup。Heapologisedforhavingblunderedintothekitchen,andofferedtogooutagainandworkroundtothefront。Robinareplied,withunnecessaryseverityasIthought,thatanarchitect,ifanyone,mighthaveknownthedifferencebetweentherightsideofahouseandthewrong;butpresumedthatyouthandinexperiencecouldalwaysbepleadedasexcuseforstupidity。IcannotmyselfseewhyRobinashouldhavebeensomuchannoyed。Labour,asRobinahadbeenexplainingtoVeronicaonlyafewhoursbefore,exaltsawoman。Inoldendays,ladies——thehighestintheland——wereproud,notashamed,oftheirabilitytoperformdomesticduties。This,lateron,I
pointedouttoRobina。Heranswerwasthatinoldendaysyoudidn’thavechitsofboysgoingabout,callingthemselvesarchitects,andopeningback—doorswithoutknocking;oriftheydidknock,knockingsothatnobodyonearthcouldhearthem。
Robinawipedherhandsonthetowelbehindthedoor,andbroughthimintothefront—room,wheresheannouncedhim,coldly,as\"Theyoungmanfromthearchitect’soffice。\"Heexplained——butquitemodestly——
thathewasnotexactlyMessrs。Spreight’syoungman,butanarchitecthimself,ajuniormemberofthefirm。Tomakeitclearheproducedhiscard,whichwasthatofMr。ArchibaldT。Bute,F。R。I。B。A。Practicallyspeaking,allthiswasunnecessary。ThroughtheopendoorIhad,ofcourse,heardeveryword;andoldSpreighthadtoldmeofhisintentiontosendmeoneofhismostpromisingassistants,whowouldbeabletodevotehimselfentirelytomywork。
IputmattersrightbyintroducinghimformallytoRobina。Theybowedtooneanotherratherstiffly。Robinasaidthatifhewouldexcusehershewouldreturntoherwork;andheanswered\"Charmed,\"
andalsothathedidn’tmeanit。AsIhavetriedtogetitintoRobina’shead,theyoungfellowwasconfused。Hehadmeant——itwasself—evident——thathewascharmedatbeingintroducedtoher,notatherdesiretoreturntothekitchen。ButRobinaappearstohavetakenadisliketohim。
Igavehimacigar,andwestartedforthehouse。Itliesjustamilefromthiscottage,theothersideofthewood。OneexcellenttraitinhimIsoondiscovered——heisintelligentwithoutknowingeverything。
Iconfessittomyshame,buttheyoungmanwhoknowseverythinghascometopalluponme。AccordingtoEmerson,thisisaproofofmyownintellectualfeebleness。Thestrongman,intellectually,cultivatesthesocietyofhissuperiors。Hewantstogeton,hewantstolearnthings。IfIlovedknowledgeasoneshould,Iwouldhavenoonebutyoungmenaboutme。TherewasafriendofDick’s,agentlemanfromRugby。Atonetimehehadhopesofme;Ifelthehad。
Buthewastooimpatient。Hetriedtobringmeontooquickly。Youmusttakeintoconsiderationnaturalcapacity。Afterlisteningtohimforanhourortwomymindwouldwander。Icouldnothelpit。
Thecarelesslaughterofuninformedmiddle—agedgentlemenandladieswouldcreeptomefromthecroquetlawnorfromthebilliard—room。I
longedtobeamongthem。SometimesIwouldbattlewithmylowernature。Whatdidtheyknow?Whatcouldtheytellme?MoreoftenI
wouldsuccumb。TherewereoccasionswhenIusedtogetupandgoawayfromhim,quitesuddenly。
ItalkedwithyoungButeduringourwalkaboutdomesticarchitectureingeneral。Hesaidheshoulddescribethepresenttendencyindomesticarchitectureastowardscorners。ThedesireoftheBritishpublicwastogointoacornerandlive。AladyforwhosehusbandhisfirmhadlatelybuiltahouseinSurreyhadpropoundedtohimaprobleminconnectionwiththispoint。Sheagreeditwasacharminghouse;nohouseinSurreyhadmorecorners,andthatwassayingmuch。
Butshecouldnotseehowforthefutureshewasgoingtobringupherchildren。Shewasahumanelymindedlady。Hithertoshehadpunishedthem,whenneedful,byputtingtheminthecorner;theshameofithadalwaysexerciseduponthemasalutaryeffect。Butinthenewhousecornersarereckonedtheprimepartsofeveryroom。Itisthehonouredguestwhoissentintothecorner。Thefatherhasacornersacredtohimself,withhighupabovehisheadacomplicatedcupboard,whereinwiththehelpofastep—ladder,hemaykeephispipesandhistobacco,andthusbyslowdegreescurehimselfofthehabitofsmoking。Themotherlikewisehashercorner,wherestandsherspinning—wheel,incasetheideacomestohertoweavesheetsandunderclothing。Italsohasabook—shelfsupportingthirteenvolumes,arrangedinaslopingpositiontolooknatural;thelastonemaintainedatitsangleofforty—fivedegreesbyaginger—jarinoldblueNankin。Youarenotsupposedtotouchthem,becausethatwoulddisarrangethem。Besideswhich,foolingabout,youmightupsettheginger—jar。Theconsequenceofallthisisthecornerisnolongerdisgraceful。Theparentcannomoresaytotheerringchild:
\"Youwickedboy!Gointothecosycornerthisveryminute!\"
Inthehouseofthefuturetheplaceofpunishmentwillhavetobethemiddleoftheroom。Theangrymotherwillexclaim:
\"Don’tyouanswerme,yousaucyminx!Yougostraightintothemiddleoftheroom,anddon’tyoudaretocomeoutofittillItellyou!\"
Thedifficultywiththeartistichouseisfindingtherightpeopletoputintoit。Inthepicturetheartisticroomneverhasanybodyinit。Thereisastripofartembroideryuponthetable,togetherwithabowlofroses。Upontheancienthigh—backedsetteeliesanitemoffancywork,unfinished——justassheleftit。Inthe\"study\"anopenbook,facedownwards,hasbeenleftonachair。Itisthelastbookhewasreading——ithasneverbeendisturbed。Apipeofquaintdesigniscolduponthelintelofthelatticewindow。Noonewilleversmokethatpipeagain:itmusthavebeendifficulttosmokeatanytime。Thesightoftheartisticroom,asdepictedinthefurniturecatalogue,alwaysbringstearstomyeyes。Peopleonceinhabitedtheserooms,readtherethoseoldvolumesboundinvellum,smoked——ortriedtosmoke——theseimpracticablepipes;whitehands,thatsomeonemaybehadlovedtokiss,onceflutteredamongthefoldsoftheseunfinishedantimacassars,orBerlinwool—workslippers,andwentaway,leavingthethingsabout。
Onetakesitthatthepeoplewhoonceoccupiedtheseartisticroomsarenowalldead。Thiswastheir\"Dining—Room。\"Theysatonthoseartisticchairs。TheycouldhardlyhaveusedthedinnerservicesetoutupontheElizabethandresser,becausethatwouldhaveleftthedresserbare:oneassumestheyhadanextraserviceforuse,orelsethattheytooktheirmealsinthekitchen。The\"EntranceHall\"isasingularlychasteapartment。Thereisnonecessityforadoor—mat:
peoplewithmuddyboots,itistobepresumed,weresentroundtotheback。Ariding—cloak,therelicapparentlyofahighwayman,hangsbehindthedoor。Itisthesortofcloakyouwouldexpecttofindthere——adecorativecloak。Anumbrellaorawaterproofcapewouldbefataltothewholeeffect。
Nowandagaintheillustratoroftheartisticroomwillpermitayounggirltocomeandsitthere。Butshehastobeaverycarefullyselectedgirl。Tobeginwith,shehasgottolookanddressasthoughshehadbeenbornatleastthreehundredyearsago。Shehasgottohavethatsortofclothes,andshehasgottohaveherhairdonejustthatway。
Shehasgottolooksad;acheerfulgirlintheartisticroomwouldjarone’sartisticsense。Oneimaginestheartistconsultingwiththeproudpossessorofthehouse。
\"Youhaven’tgotsuchathingasamiserabledaughter,haveyou?
Somefairlygood—lookinggirlwhohasbeencrossedinlove,orismisunderstood。Becauseifso,youmightdressherupinsomethingoutofthelocalmuseumandsendheralong。Alittlethinglikethatgivesverisimilitudetoadesign。\"
Shemustnottouchanything。Allshemaydoistoreadabook——notreallyreadit,thatwouldsuggesttoomuchlifeandmovement:shesitswiththebookinherlapandgazesintothefire,ifithappenstobethedining—room:oroutofthewindowifithappenstobeamorning—room,andthearchitectwishestocallattentiontothewindow—seat。Nothingofthemalespecies,asfarasIhavebeenabletoascertain,haseverenteredtheserooms。IoncethoughtIhadfoundamanwhohadbeenallowedintohisown\"Smoking—Den,\"butoncloserexaminationitturnedouthewasonlyaportrait。
Sometimesoneisgiven\"Vistas。\"Doorsstandopen,andyoucanseerightawaythrough\"TheNook\"intothegarden。Thereisneveralivingsoulabouttheplace。Thewholefamilyhasbeensentoutforawalkorlockedupinthecellars。Thisstrikesyouasodduntilyoucometothinkthematterout。Themodernmanandwomanisnotartistic。Iamnotartistic——notwhatIcallreallyartistic。I
don’tgowellwithGobelintapestryandwarming—pans。IfeelI
don’t。Robinaisnotartistic,notinthatsense。ItriedheroncewithaharpsichordIpickedupcheapinWardourStreet,andareproductionofaRomanstool。Thethingwasanutterfailure。A
cottagepiano,withaphoto—frameandafernupon,itiswhatthesoulcriesoutforinconnectionwithRobina。Dickisnotartistic。
Dickdoesnotgowithpeacocks’feathersandguitars。IcanseeDickwithasinglepeacock’sfeatheratSt。Giles’sFair,whenthebulldogsarenotlooking;butthedecorativepanelofpeacock’sfeathersistoomuchforhim。Icanimaginehimwithabanjo——butaguitardecoratedwithpinkribbons!Tobeginwithheisnotdressedforit。Unlessafamilybepreparedtomakethemselvesupastroubadoursorcavaliersandtotalkblankverse,Idon’tseehowtheycanexpecttobehappylivinginthesefifteenth—centuryhouses。
Themodernfamily——theoldmaninbaggytrousersandafrock—coathecouldnotbuttonifhetriedto;themotheroffiguredistinctlyVictorian;theboysinflannelsuitsandcollarsuptotheirears;
thegirlsinmotorcaps——areasincongruousinthesemediaevaldwellingsasapartyofCook’stouristsdrinkingbottledbeerinthestreetsofPompeii。
Thedesignerof\"TheArtisticHome\"isrightinkeepingtostilllife。Intheartistichome——toparaphraseDr。Watts——everyprospectpleasesandonlymanisinartistic。Inthepicture,theartisticbedroom,\"inapplegreen,thebedsteadofcherry—wood,withatouchofturkey—redthroughoutthedraperies,\"ischarming。Itneedhardlybesaidthebedisempty。Putamanorwomaninthatcherry—woodbed——Idon’tcarehowartistictheymaythinkthemselves——thecharmwouldbegone。Thereallyartisticparty,onesupposes,hasalittleroombehind,wherehesleepsanddresseshimself。Hepeepsinatthedoorofthisartisticbedroom,maybeoccasionallyenterstochangetheroses。
Imaginetheartisticnurseryfiveminutesaftertherealchildhadbeenletlooseinit。Iknowaladywhooncespenthundredsofpoundsonanartisticnursery。Sheshowedittoherfriendswithpride。ThechildrenwereallowedinthereonSundayafternoons。I
didanequallysillythingmyselfnotlongago。Luredbyafurniturecatalogue,IstartedRobinainaboudoir。Igaveittoherasabirthday—present。Wehavebothregrettediteversince。Robinareckonsshecouldhavehadabicycle,adiamondbracelet,andamandoline,andIshouldhavesavedmoney。Ididthethingwell。I
toldthefurniturepeopleIwanteditjustasitstoodinthepicture:\"Designforbedroomandboudoircombined,suitableforyounggirl,inteak,withsparrowbluehangings。\"Wehadeverything:
theantiquefirearrangementsthatavestalvirginmightpossiblyhaveunderstood;thecandlesticks,thatwerepicturesinthemselves,untilwetriedtoputcandlesinthem;thebook—caseandwriting—deskcombined,thatwasn’tbigenoughtowriteon,andoutofwhichitwasimpossibletogetabookuntilyouhadabandonedtheideaofwritingandhadclosedthecover;theenclosedwashstand,thatshutdownandlookedlikeanoldbureau,withtheinevitablebowlofflowersuponitthathadtobetakenoffandputonthefloorwheneveryouwantedtousethethingasawashstand;thetoilet—table,withitscunninglittleglass,justbigenoughtoseeyournosein;thebedstead,hiddenawaybehindthe\"thinkingcorner,\"wherethegirlcouldn’tgetatittomakeit。Aprettierroomyoucouldnothaveimagined,tillRobinastartedsleepinginit。Ithinkshetried。Girlfriendsofhers,towhomshehadbraggedaboutit,woulddropinandasktobeallowedtoseeit。Robinawouldsay,\"Waitaminute,\"andwouldrunupandslamthedoor;andwewouldhearherforthenexthalf—hourorsorushingroundopeningandshuttingdrawersanddraggingthingsabout。Bythetimeitwasaboudoiragainshewasexhaustedandirritable。ShewantsnowtogiveituptoVeronica,butVeronicaobjectstotheposition,whichisbetweenthebathroomandmystudy。
Herideaisaroommoreremoved,whereshewouldbeabletoshutherselfinanddoherwork,assheexplains,withoutfearofinterruption。
YoungButetoldmethatafriendofhis,awell—to—doyoungfellow,wholivedinPiccadilly,hadhadthewhimtomakehisflatthereproductionofaRomanvilla。Therewereofcoursenofires,theroomswerewarmedbyhotairfromthekitchen。TheyhadacheerlessaspectonaNovemberafternoon,andnobodyknewexactlywheretosit。
LightwasobtainedintheeveningfromGrecianlamps,whichmadeiteasytounderstandwhytheancientAthenians,asarule,wenttobedearly。Youdinedsprawlingonacouch。Thiswasnodoubtpracticablewhenyoutookyourplateintoyourhandandfedyourselfwithyourfingers;butwithaknifeandforkthemealhadalltheadvantagesofahotpicnic。Youdidnotfeelluxuriousorevenwicked:youonlyfeltnervousaboutyourclothes。Thethinglackedcompleteness。HecouldnotexpecthisfriendstocometohiminRomantogas,andevenhisownmandeclinedfirmlytowearthecostumeofaRomanslave。Thecompromisewasunsatisfactory,evenfromthepurelypictorialpointofview。YoucannotbeaRomanpatricianofthetimeofAntoninuswhenyouhappentoliveinPiccadillyattheopeningofthetwentiethcentury。Allyoucandoistomakeyourfriendsuncomfortableandspoiltheirdinnerforthem。YoungButesaidthat,sofarashewasconcerned,hewouldalwaysratherhavespenttheeveningwithhislittlenephewsandnieces,playingathorses;itseemedtohimamoresensiblegame。