CHAPTERI
\"Itisnotalargehouse，\"Isaid。\"Wedon’twantalargehouse。
Twosparebedrooms，andthelittlethree—corneredplaceyouseemarkedthereontheplan，nexttothebathroom，andwhichwilljustdoforabachelor，willbeallweshallrequire——atallevents，forthepresent。Lateron，ifIevergetrich，wecanthrowoutawing。
ThekitchenIshallhavetobreaktoyourmothergently。Whatevertheoriginalarchitectcouldhavebeenthinkingof——\"
\"Nevermindthekitchen，\"saidDick：\"whataboutthebilliard—room？\"
Thewaychildrennowadayswillinterruptaparentisnothingshortofanationaldisgrace。IalsowishDickwouldnotsitonthetable，swinginghislegs。Itisnotrespectful。\"Why，whenIwasaboy，\"
asIsaidtohim，\"Ishouldassoonhavethoughtofsittingonatable，interruptingmyfather——\"
\"What’sthisthinginthemiddleofthehall，thatlookslikeagrating？\"demandedRobina。
\"Shemeansthestairs，\"explainedDick。
\"Thenwhydon’ttheylooklikestairs？\"commentedRobina。
\"Theydo，\"repliedDick，\"topeoplewithsense。\"
\"Theydon’t，\"persistedRobina，\"theylooklikeagrating。\"Robina，withtheplanspreadoutacrossherknee，wassittingbalancedonthearmofaneasy—chair。Really，Ihardlyseetheuseofbuyingchairsforthesepeople。Nobodyseemstoknowwhattheyarefor——exceptitbeoneoranotherofthedogs。Perchesarealltheywant。
\"Ifwethrewthedrawing—roomintothehallandcoulddoawaywiththestairs，\"thoughtRobina，\"weshouldbeabletogiveadancenowandthen。\"
\"Perhaps，\"Isuggested，\"youwouldliketoclearoutthehousealtogether，leavingnothingbutthefourbarewalls。Thatwouldgiveusstillmoreroom，thatwould。Forjustlivingin，wecouldfixupashedinthegarden；or——\"
\"I’mtalkingseriously，\"saidRobina：\"what’sthegoodofadrawing—
room？Oneonlywantsittoshowthesortofpeopleintothatonewisheshadn’tcome。They’dsitabout，lookingmiserable，justaswellanywhereelse。Ifwecouldonlygetridofthestairs——\"
\"Oh，ofcourse！wecouldgetridofthestairs，\"Iagreed。\"Itwouldbeabitawkwardatfirst，whenwewantedtogotobed。ButI
daresayweshouldgetusedtoit。Wecouldhavealadderandclimbuptoourroomsthroughthewindows。OrwemightadopttheNorwegianmethodandhavethestairsoutside。\"
\"Iwishyouwouldbesensible，\"saidRobin。
\"Iamtryingtobe，\"Iexplained；\"andIamalsotryingtoputalittlesenseintoyou。Atpresentyouarecrazyaboutdancing。Ifyouhadyourway，youwouldturnthehouseintoadancing—saloonwithprimitivesleeping—accommodationattached。Itwilllastsixmonths，yourdancingcraze。Thenyouwillwantthehousetransformedintoaswimming—bath，oraskating—rink，orclearedoutforhockey。Myideamaybeconventional。Idon’texpectyoutosympathisewithit。MynotionisjustanordinaryChristianhouse，notagymnasium。Therearegoingtobebedroomsinthishouse，andthere’sgoingtobeastaircaseleadingtothem。Itmaystrikeyouassordid，butthereisalsogoingtobeakitchen：thoughwhywhenbuildingthehousetheyshouldhaveputthekitchen—
\"Don’tforgetthebilliard—room，\"saidDick。
\"Ifyouthoughtmoreofyourfuturecareerandlessaboutbilliards，\"
Robinpointedouttohim，\"perhapsyou’dgetthroughyourLittle—gointhecourseofthenextfewyears。IfPaonlyhadsense——Imeanifhewasn’tsoabsurdlyindulgentwhereveryouareconcerned，hewouldnothaveabilliard—tableinthehouse。\"
\"Youtalklikethat，\"retortedDick，\"merelybecauseyoucan’tplay。\"
\"Icanbeatyou，anyhow，\"retortedRobin。
\"Once，\"admittedDick——\"onceinsixweeks。\"
\"Twice，\"correctedRobin。
\"Youdon’tplay，\"Dickexplainedtoher；\"youjustwhackroundandtrusttoProvidence。\"
\"Idon’twhackround，\"saidRobin；\"Ialwaysaimatsomething。Whenyoutryanditdoesn’tcomeoff，yousayit’s’hardluck；’andwhenI
tryanditdoescomeoff，yousayit’sfluking。Solikeaman。\"
\"Youbothofyou，\"Isaid，\"attachtoomuchimportancetothescore。
Whenyoutryforacannonoffthewhiteandhititonthewrongsideandsenditintoapocket，andyourownballtravelsonandmakesalosinghazardoffthered，insteadofbeingvexedwithyourselves——\"
\"Ifyougetareallygoodtable，governor，\"saidDick，\"I’llteachyoubilliards。\"
IdobelieveDickreallythinkshecanplay。Itisthesamewithgolf。Beginnersareinvariablylucky。\"IthinkIshalllikeit，\"
theytellyou；\"Iseemtohavethegameinme，ifyouunderstand。\"
’Thereisafriendofmine，anoldsea—captain。Heisthesortofmanthatwhenthethreeballsarelyinginastraightline，tuckedupunderthecushion，lookspleased；becausethenheknowshecanmakeacannonandleavetheredjustwherehewantsit。AnIrishyoungsternamedMalooney，acollegechumofDick’s，wasstayingwithus；andtheafternoonbeingwet，theCaptainsaidhewouldexplainittoMalooney，howayoungmanmightpractisebilliardswithoutanydangerofcuttingthecloth。Hetaughthimhowtoholdthecue，andhetoldhimhowtomakeabridge。Malooneywasgrateful，andworkedforaboutanhour。Hedidnotshowmuchpromise。Heisapowerfullybuiltyoungman，andhedidn’tseemabletogetitintohisheadthathewasn’tplayingcricket。Wheneverhehitalittlelowtheresultwasgenerallylostball。Tosavetime——anddamagetofurniture——DickandIfieldedforhim。Dickstoodatlong—stop，andIwasshortslip。Itwasdangerouswork，however，andwhenDickhadcaughthimouttwicerunning，weagreedthatwehadwon，andtookhimintotea。
Intheevening——noneoftherestofusbeingkeentotryourluckasecondtime——theCaptainsaid，thatjustforthejokeofthethinghewouldgiveMalooneyeighty—fiveandplayhimahundredup。Toconfessthetruth，IfindnoparticularfunmyselfinplayingbilliardswiththeCaptain。Thegameconsists，asfarasIamconcerned，inwalkingroundthetable，throwinghimbacktheballs，andsaying\"Good！\"BythetimemyturncomesIdon’tseemtocarewhathappens：everythingseemsagainstme。Heisakindoldgentlemanandhemeanswell，butthetoneinwhichhesays\"Hardlines！\"wheneverImissaneasystrokeirritatesme。IfeelI’dliketothrowtheballsathisheadandflingthetableoutofwindow。I
supposeitisthatIaminafretfulstateofmind，butthemerewayinwhichhechalkshiscueaggravatesme。Hecarrieshisownchalkinhiswaistcoatpocket——asifourchalkwasn’tgoodenoughforhim——
andwhenhehasfinishedchalking，hesmoothsthetiproundwithhisfingerandthumbandtapsthecueagainstthetable。\"Oh！goonwiththegame，\"Iwanttosaytohim；\"don’tbesofulloftricks。\"
TheCaptainledoffwithamissinbaulk。Malooneygrippedhiscue，drewinadeepbreath，andletfly。Theresultwasten：acannonandallthreeballsinthesamepocket。Asamatteroffacthemadethecannontwice；butthesecondtime，asweexplainedtohim，ofcoursedidnotcount。
\"Goodbeginning！\"saidtheCaptain。
Malooneyseemedpleasedwithhimself，andtookoffhiscoat。
Malooney’sballmissedtheredonitsfirstjourneyupthetablebyaboutafoot，butfounditlateronandsentitintoapocket。
\"Ninety—nineplaysnothing，\"saidDick，whowasmarking。\"Bettermakeitahundredandfifty，hadn’twe，Captain？\"
\"Well，I’dliketogetinashot，\"saidtheCaptain，\"beforethegameisover。Perhapswehadbettermakeitahundredandfifty，ifMr。
Malooneyhasnoobjection。\"
\"Whateveryouthinkright，sir，\"saidRoryMalooney。
Malooneyfinishedhisbreakfortwenty—two，leavinghimselfhangingoverthemiddlepocketandtheredtuckedupinbaulk。
\"Nothingplaysahundredandeight，\"saidDick。
\"WhenIwantthescore，\"saidtheCaptain，\"I’llaskforit。\"
\"Begpardon，sir，\"saidDick。
\"Ihateanoisygame，\"saidtheCaptain。
TheCaptain，makinguphismindwithoutmuchwasteoftime，senthisballunderthecushion，sixinchesoutsidebaulk。
\"WhatwillIdohere？\"askedMalooney。
\"Idon’tknowwhatyouwilldo，\"saidtheCaptain；\"I’mwaitingtosee。\"
Owingtothepositionoftheball，Malooneywasunabletoemployhiswholestrength。AllhedidthatturnwastopockettheCaptain’sballandleavehimselfunderthebottomcushion，fourinchesfromthered。TheCaptainsaidanauticalword，andgaveanothermiss。
Malooneysquareduptotheballsforthethirdtime。Theyflewbeforehim，panic—stricken。Theybangedagainstoneanother，camebackandhitoneanotheragainfornoreasonwhatever。Thered，inparticular，Malooneyhadsucceededapparentlyinfrighteningoutofitswits。Itisastupidball，generallyspeaking，ourred——itsoneideatogetunderacushionandwatchthegame。WithMalooneyitsoonfounditwassafenowhereonthetable。Itsonlyhopewaspockets。Imayhavebeenmistaken，myeyemayhavebeendeceivedbytherapidityoftheplay，butitseemedtomethattheredneverwaitedtobehit。WhenitsawMalooney’sballcomingforitattherateoffortymilesanhour，itjustmadeforthenearestpocket。Itrushedroundthetablelookingforpockets。Ifinitsexcitement，itpassedanemptypocket，itturnedbackandcrawledin。Thereweretimeswheninitsterroritjumpedthetableandtookshelterunderthesofaorbehindthesideboard。Onebegantofeelsorryforthered。
TheCaptainhadscoredalegitimatethirty—eight，andMalooneyhadgivenhimtwenty—four，whenitreallyseemedasiftheCaptain’schancehadcome。Icouldhavescoredmyselfastheballswerethen。
\"Sixty—twoplaysonehundredandtwenty—eight。Nowthen，Captain，gameinyourhands，\"saidDick。
Wegatheredround。Thechildrenlefttheirplay。Itwasaprettypicture：thebrightyoungfaces，eagerwithexpectation，theoldwornveteransquintingdownhiscue，asifafraidthatwatchingMalooney’splaymighthavegivenitthesquirms。
\"Nowfollowthis，\"IwhisperedtoMalooney。\"Don’tnoticemerelywhathedoes，buttryandunderstandwhyhedoesit。Anyfool——afteralittlepractice，thatis——canhitaball。Butwhydoyouhitit？
Whathappensafteryou’vehitit？What——\"
\"Hush，\"saidDick。
TheCaptaindrewhiscuebackandgentlypusheditforward。
\"Prettystroke，\"IwhisperedtoMalooney；\"now，that’sthesort——\"
Ioffer，bywayofexplanation，thattheCaptainbythistimewasprobablytoofullofbottled—uplanguagetobemasterofhisnerves。
Theballtravelledslowlypastthered。Dicksaidafterwardsthatyoucouldn’thaveputsomuchasasheetofpaperbetweenthem。Itcomfortsaman，sometimes，whenyoutellhimthis；andatothertimesitonlymakeshimmadder。Ittravelledonandpassedthewhite——youcouldhaveputquitealotofpaperbetweenitandthewhite——anddroppedwithacontentedthudintothetopleft—handpocket。
\"Whydoeshedothat？\"Malooneywhispered。Malooneyhasasingularlyheartywhisper。
DickandIgotthewomenandchildrenoutoftheroomasquicklyaswecould，butofcourseVeronicamanagedtotumbleoversomethingontheway——VeronicawouldfindsomethingtotumbleoverinthedesertofSahara；andafewdayslaterIoverheardexpressions，scorchingtheirwaythroughthenurserydoor，thatmademyhairriseup。I
entered，andfoundVeronicastandingonthetable。Jumbowassittinguponthemusic—stool。Thepoordoghimselfwaslookingscared，thoughhemusthaveheardabitoflanguageinhistime，onewayandanother。
\"Veronica，\"Isaid，\"areyounotashamedofyourself？Youwickedchild，howdareyou——\"
\"It’sallright，\"saidVeronica。\"Idon’treallymeananyharm。
He’sasailor，andIhavetotalktohimlikethat，elsehedon’tknowhe’sbeingtalkedto。\"
Ipayhard—working，conscientiousladiestoteachthischildthingsrightandproperforhertoknow。TheytellhercleverthingsthatJuliusCaesarsaid；observationsmadebyMarcusAureliusthat，ponderedover，mighthelphertobecomeabeautifulcharacter。Shecomplainsthatitproducesastrangebuzzyfeelinginherhead；andhermotherarguesthatperhapsherbrainisofthecreativeorder，notintendedtoremembermuch——thinksthatperhapssheisgoingtobesomething。Agoodround—dozenoathstheCaptainmusthaveletflybeforeDickandIsucceededinrollingheroutoftheroom。Shehadonlyheardthemonce，yet，sofarasIcouldjudge，shehadgotthemletterperfect。
TheCaptain，nownolongerunderthenecessityofemployingallhisenergiestosuppresshisnaturalinstincts，graduallyrecoveredform，andeventuallythegamestoodatonehundredandforty—nineall，Malooneytoplay。TheCaptainhadlefttheballsinapositionthatwouldhavedisheartenedanyotheropponentthanMalooney。ToanyotheropponentthanMalooneytheCaptainwouldhaveofferedirritatingsympathy。\"Afraidtheballsarenotrollingwellforyouto—night，\"theCaptainwouldhavesaid；or，\"Sorry，sir，Idon’tseemtohaveleftyouverymuch。\"To—nighttheCaptainwasn’tfeelingplayful。
\"Well，ifhescoresoffthat！\"saidDick。
\"Shortoflockinguptheballsandturningoutthelights，Idon’tmyselfseehowoneisgoingtostophim，\"sighedtheCaptain。
TheCaptain’sballwasinhand。Malooneywentfortheredandhit——
perhapsitwouldbemorecorrecttosay，frightened——itintoapocket。Malooney’sball，withthetabletoitself，thengaveasoloperformance，andendedupbybreakingawindow。Itwaswhatthelawyerscallanicepoint。Whatwastheeffectuponthescore？
Malooneyarguedthat，seeinghehadpocketedtheredbeforehisownballleftthetable，histhreeshouldbecountedfirst，andthatthereforehehadwon。Dickmaintainedthataballthathadendedupinaflower—bedcouldn’tbedeemedtohavescoredanything。TheCaptaindeclinedtoassist。Hesaidthat，althoughhehadbeenplayingbilliardsforupwardsoffortyyears，theincidentwasnewtohim。Myownfeelingwasthatofthankfulnessthatwehadgotthroughthegamewithoutanybodybeingreallyinjured。WeagreedthatthepersontodecidethepointwouldbetheeditorofTheField。
Itremainsstillundecided。TheCaptaincameintomystudythenextmorning。Hesaid：\"Ifyouhaven’twrittenthatlettertoTheField，don’tmentionmyname。TheyknowmeonTheField。IwouldratheritdidnotgetaboutthatIhavebeenplayingwithamanwhocannotkeephisballwithinthefourwallsofabilliard—room。\"
\"Well，\"Ianswered，\"IknowmostofthefellowsonTheFieldmyself。
Theydon’toftengetholdofanythingnovelinthewayofastory。
Whentheydo，theyareapttoharpuponit。Myideawastokeepmyownnameoutofitaltogether。\"
\"Itisnotapointlikelytocropupoften，\"saidtheCaptain。\"I’dletitrestifIwereyou。\"
Ishouldliketohavehaditsettled。Intheend，Iwrotetheeditoracarefulletter，inadisguisedhand，givingafalsenameandaddress。ButifanyanswereverappearedImusthavemissedit。
MyselfIhaveasortofconsciousnessthatsomewhereinsidemethereisquiteagoodplayer，ifonlyIcouldpersuadehimtocomeout。Heisshy，thatisall。Hedoesnotseemabletoplaywhenpeoplearelookingon。Theshotshemisseswhenpeoplearelookingonwouldgiveyouawrongideaofhim。Whennobodyisabout，aprettiergameyoudonotoftensee。Ifsomefolkswhofancythemselvescouldseemewhenthereisnobodyabout，itmighttaketheconceitoutofthem。
OnlyonceIplayeduptowhatIfeelismyrealform，andthenitledtoargument。IwasstayingatanhotelinSwitzerland，andthesecondeveningapleasant—spokenyoungfellow，whosaidhehadreadallmybooks——later，heappearedsurprisedonlearningIhadwrittenmorethantwo——askedmeifIwouldcaretoplayahundredup。Weplayedeven，andIpaidforthetable。ThenexteveninghesaidhethoughtitwouldmakeabettergameifhegavemefortyandIbroke。
Itwasafairlyclosefinish，andafterwardshesuggestedthatI
shouldputdownmynameforthehandicaptheywerearranging。
\"Iamafraid，\"Ianswered，\"thatIhardlyplaywellenough。Justaquietgamewithyouisonething；butinahandicapwithacrowdlookingon——\"
\"Ishouldnotletthattroubleyou，\"hesaid；\"therearesomeherewhoplayworsethanyou——justoneortwo。Itpassestheevening。\"
Itwasmerelyafriendlyaffair。Ipaidmytwentymarks，andwasgivenplusahundred。Idrewformyfirstgameachattytypeofman，whostartedminustwenty。Weneitherofusdidmuchforthefirstfiveminutes，andthenImadeabreakofforty—four。
Therewasnotaflukeinitfrombeginningtoend。Iwasnevermoreastonishedinmylife。Itseemedtomeitwasthecuewasdoingit。
MinusTwentywasevenmoreastonished。IheardhimasIpassed：
\"Whohandicappedthisman？\"heasked。
\"Idid，\"saidthepleasant—spokenyoungster。
\"Oh，\"saidMinusTwenty——\"friendofyours，Ipresume？\"
Thereareeveningsthatseemtobelongtoyou。Wefinishedthattwohundredandfiftyunderthethree—quartersofanhour。IexplainedtoMinusTwenty——hewasplussixty—threeattheend——thatmyplaythatnighthadbeenexceptional。Hesaidthathehadheardofcasessimilar。Ilefthimtalkingvolublytothecommittee。Hewasnotanicemanatall。
AfterthatIdidnotcaretowin；andthatofcoursewasfatal。ThelessItried，themoreimpossibleitseemedformetodowrong。I
wasleftinatthelastwithamanfromanotherhotel。ButforthatIamconvincedIshouldhavecarriedoffthehandicap。Ourhoteldidn’t，anyhow，wanttheotherhoteltowin。Sotheygatheredroundme，andofferedmesoundadvice，andbeggedmetobecareful；withthenaturalresultthatIwentbacktomyusualformquitesuddenly。
NeverbeforeorsincehaveIplayedasIplayedthatweek。ButitshowedmewhatIcoulddo。Ishallgetanewtable，withproperpocketsthistime。Thereissomethingwrongaboutourpockets。Theballsgointothemandthencomeoutagain。Youwouldthinktheyhadseensomethingtheretofrightenthem。Theycomeouttremblingandholdontothecushion。
Ishallalsogetanewredball。Ifancyitmustbeaveryoldball，ourred。Itseemstometobealwaystired。
\"Thebilliard—room，\"IsaidtoDick，\"Iseemywaytoeasilyenough。
Addinganothertenfeettowhatisnowthedairywillgiveustwenty—
eightbytwenty。IamhopefulthatwillbesufficientevenforyourfriendMalooney。Thedrawing—roomistoosmalltobeofanyuse。I
maydecide——asRobinahassuggested——to’throwitintothehall。’
Butthestairswillremain。Fordancing，privatetheatricals——thingstokeepyouchildrenoutofmischief——IhaveanideaIwillexplaintoyoulateron。Thekitchen——\"
\"CanIhavearoomtomyself？\"askedVeronica。
Veronicawassittingonthefloor，staringintothefire，herchinsupportedbyherhand。Veronica，inthoseraremomentswhensheisrestingfromhertroubles，wearsaholy，far—awayexpressionapttomisleadthestranger。Governesses，newtoher，havetheirdoubtswhetherontheseoccasionstheyarejustifiedindraggingherbacktodiscussmeredatesandtables。Poetswhoarefriendsofmine，comingunexpectedlyuponVeronicastandingbythewindow，gazingupwardattheeveningstar，havethoughtitwasavision，untiltheygotcloserandfoundthatshewassuckingpeppermints。
\"Ishouldsoliketohavearoomalltomyself，\"addedVeronica。
\"Itwouldbearoom！\"commentedRobin。
\"Itwouldn’thaveyourhairpinsstickingupalloverthebed，anyhow，\"murmuredVeronicadreamily。
\"Ilikethat！\"saidRobin；\"why——\"
\"You’reharderthanIam，\"saidVeronica。
\"Ishouldwishyoutohavearoom，Veronica，\"Isaid。\"Myfearisthatinplaceofoneuntidybedroominthehouse——aroomthatmakesmeshuddereverytimeIseeitthroughtheopendoor；andthedoor，inspiteofallIcansay，generallyiswideopen——\"
\"I’mnotuntidy，\"saidRobin，\"notreally。Iknowwhereeverythingisinthedark——ifpeoplewouldonlyleavethemalone。\"
\"Youare。You’reaboutthemostuntidygirlIknow，\"saidDick。
\"I’mnot，\"saidRobin；\"youdon’tseeothergirls’rooms。LookatyoursatCambridge。Malooneytoldusyou’dhadafire，andweallbelievedhimatfirst。\"
\"Whenaman’sworking——\"saidDick。
\"Hemusthaveanorderlyplacetoworkin，\"suggestedRobin。
Dicksighed。\"It’sneveranygoodtalkingtoyou，\"saidDick。\"Youdon’tevenseeyourownfaults。\"
\"Ican，\"saidRobin；\"Iseethemmorethananyone。AllIclaimisjustice。\"
\"Showme，Veronica，\"Isaid，\"thatyouareworthytopossessaroom。
Atpresentyouappeartoregardthewholehouseasyourroom。Ifindyourgaitersonthecroquetlawn。Aportionofyourcostume——anarticlethatanyonepossessedofthetruefeelingsofaladywoulddesiretokeephiddenfromtheworld——isdiscoveredwavingfromthestaircasewindow。\"
\"Iputitouttobemended，\"explainedVeronica。
\"Youopenedthedoorandflungitout。Itoldyouofitatthetime，\"saidRobin。\"Youdothesamewithyourboots。\"
\"Youaretoohigh—spiritedforyoursize，\"explainedDicktoher。
\"Trytobelessdashing。\"
\"Icouldalsowish，Veronica，\"Icontinued，\"thatyoushedyourbackcomblesseasily，oratleastthatyouknewwhenyouhadshedit。Asforyourgloves——well，huntingyourgloveshascometobeourleadingwintersport。\"
\"Peoplelookinsuchfunnyplacesforthem，\"saidVeronica。
\"Granted。Butbejust，Veronica，\"Ipleaded。\"Admitthatitisinfunnyplacesweoccasionallyfindthem。Whenlookingforyourthingsonelearns，Veronica，nevertodespair。Solongasthereremainsacornerunexploredinsideoroutsidethehouse，withinthehalf—mileradius，hopeneednotbeabandoned。\"
Veronicawasstillgazingdreamilyintothefire。
\"Isuppose，\"saidVeronica，\"it’sreditty。\"
\"It’swhat？\"Isaid。
\"Shemeansheredity，\"suggestedDick——\"cheekyyoungbeggar！Iwonderyoulethertalktoyouthewayshedoes。\"
\"Besides，\"addedRobin，\"asIamalwaysexplainingtoyou，Paisaliteraryman。Withhimitispartofhistemperament。\"
\"It’shardonuschildren，\"saidVeronica。
Wewereallagreed——withtheexceptionofVeronica——thatitwastimeVeronicawenttobed。AschairmanItookituponmyselftoclosurethedebate。
CHAPTERII
\"Doyoumean，Governor，thatyouhaveactuallyboughtthehouse？\"
demandedDick，\"orareweonlytalkingaboutit？\"
\"Thistime，Dick，\"Ianswered，\"Ihavedoneit。\"
Dicklookedserious。\"Isitwhatyouwanted？\"heasked。
\"No，Dick，\"Ireplied，\"itisnotwhatIwanted。Iwantedanold—
fashioned，picturesque，ramblingsortofaplace，allgablesandivyandorielwindows。\"
\"Youaremixingthingsup，\"Dickinterrupted，\"gablesandorielwindowsdon’tgotogether。\"
\"Ibegyourpardon，Dick，\"Icorrectedhim，\"inthehouseIwanted，theydo。ItisthestyleofhouseyoufindintheChristmasnumber。
Ihaveneverseenitanywhereelse，butItookafancytoitfromthefirst。Itisnottoofarfromthechurch，anditlightsupwellatnight。’Oneofthesedays，’Iusedtosaytomyselfwhenaboy，’I’llbeaclevermanandliveinahousejustlikethat。’Itwasmydream。\"
\"Andwhatisthisplacelike？\"demandedRobin，\"thisplaceyouhavebought。\"
\"Theagent，\"Iexplained，\"claimsforitthatitiscapableofimprovement。Iaskedhimtowhatschoolofarchitecturehewouldsayitbelonged；hesaidhethoughtthatitmusthavebeenalocalschool，andpointedout——whatseemstobethetruth——thatnowadaystheydonotbuildsuchhouses。\"
\"Neartotheriver？\"demandedDick。
\"Well，bytheroad，\"Ianswered，\"Idaresayitmaybeacoupleofmiles。\"
\"Andbytheshortestway？\"questionedDick。
\"Thatistheshortestway，\"Iexplained；\"there’saprettierwaythroughthewoods，butthatisaboutthreemilesandahalf。\"
\"Butwehaddecideditwastobeneartheriver，\"saidRobin。
\"Wealsodecided，\"Ireplied，\"thatitwastobeonsandysoil，withasouth—westaspect。Onlyonethinginthishousehasasouth—westaspect，andthat’sthebackdoor。Iaskedtheagentaboutthesand。
Headvisedme，ifIwanteditinanyquantity，togetanestimatefromtheRailwayCompany。Iwanteditonahill。Itisonahill，withabiggerhillinfrontofit。Ididn’twantthatotherhill。I
wantedanuninterruptedviewofthesouthernhalfofEngland。I
wantedtotakepeopleoutonthestep，andcramthemwithstoriesaboutourbeingableoncleardaystoseetheBristolChannel。Theymightnothavebelievedme，butwithoutthathillIcouldhavestucktoit，andtheycouldnothavebeencertain——notdeadcertain——Iwaslying。
\"Personally，Ishouldhavelikedahousewheresomethinghadhappened。Ishouldhaveliked，myself，ablood—stain——notafussyblood—stain，aneatunobtrusiveblood—stainthatwouldhavebeencontent，mostofitstime，toremainhiddenunderthemat，shownonlyoccasionallyasatreattovisitors。Ihadhopesevenofaghost。I
don’tmeanoneofthosenoisyghoststhatdoesn’tseemtoknowitisdead。Aladyghostwouldhavebeenmyfancy，agentleghostwithquiet，prettyways。Thishouse——well，itissuchasensible—lookinghouse，thatismychiefobjectiontoit。Ithasgotanecho。Ifyougototheendofthegardenandshoutatitveryloudly，itanswersyouback。Thisistheonlybitoffunyoucanhavewithit。Eventhenitanswersyouinsuchatoneyoufeelitthinksthewholethingsilly——isdoingitmerelytohumouryou。Itisoneofthosehousesthatalwaysseemstobethinkingofitsratesandtaxes。\"
\"Anyreasonatallforyourhavingboughtit？\"askedDick。
\"Yes，Dick，\"Ianswered。\"Weareallofustiredofthissuburb。Wewanttoliveinthecountryandbegood。Toliveinthecountrywithanycomfortitisnecessarytohaveahousethere。Thisbeingadmitted，itfollowswemusteitherbuildahouseorbuyone。I
wouldrathernotbuildahouse。Talboysbuilthimselfahouse。YouknowTalboys。WhenIfirstmethim，beforehestartedbuilding，hewasacheerfulsoulwithakindlywordforeveryone。Thebuilderassureshimthatinanothertwentyyears，whenthecolourhashadtimetotonedown，hishousewillbeapicture。Atpresentitmakeshimbilious，themeresightofit。Yearbyyear，theytellhim，asthedampnesswearsitselfaway，hewillsufferlessandlessfromrheumatism，ague，andlumbago。Hehasahedgeroundthegarden；itiseighteenincheshigh。Tokeeptheboysouthehasputupbarbed—
wirefencing。Butwirefencingaffordsnorealprivacy。WhentheTalboysaretakingcoffeeonthelawn，thereisgenerallyacrowdfromthevillagewatchingthem。Therearetreesinthegarden；youknowtheyaretrees——thereisalabeltiedtoeachonetellingyouwhatsortoftreeitis。Forthemomentthereisasimilarityaboutthem。Thirtyyearshence，Talboysestimates，theywillaffordhimshadeandcomfort；butbythattimehehopestobedead。Iwantahousethathasgotoverallitstroubles；Idon’twanttospendtherestofmylifebringingupayoungandinexperiencedhouse。\"
\"Butwhythisparticularhouse？\"urgedRobin，\"if，asyousay，itisnotthehouseyouwanted。\"
\"Because，mydeargirl，\"Ianswered，\"itislessunlikethehouseI
wantedthanotherhousesIhaveseen。Whenweareyoungwemakeupourmindstotryandgetwhatwewant；whenwehavearrivedatyearsofdiscretionwedecidetotryandwantwhatwecanget。Itsavestime。DuringthelasttwoyearsIhaveseenaboutsixtyhouses，andoutofthelottherewasonlyonethatwasreallythehouseIwanted。
HithertoIhavekeptthestorytomyself。Evennow，thinkingaboutitirritatesme。Itwasnotanagentwhotoldmeofit。Imetamanbychanceinarailwaycarriage。Hehadablackeye。IfeverImeethimagainI’llgivehimanother。Heaccountedforitbyexplainingthathehadhadtroublewithagolfball，andatthetimeIbelievedhim。ImentionedtohiminconversationIwaslookingforahouse。
Hedescribedthisplacetome，anditseemedtomehoursbeforethetrainstoppedatastation。WhenitdidIgotoutandtookthenexttrainback。Ididnotevenwaitforlunch。Ihadmybicyclewithme，andIwentstraightthere。Itwas——well，itwasthehouseI
wanted。Ifithadvanishedsuddenly，andIhadfoundmyselfinbed，thewholethingwouldhaveseemedmorereasonable。Theproprietoropenedthedoortomehimself。Hehadthebearingofaretiredmilitaryman。ItwasafterwardsIlearnthewastheproprietor。
\"Isaid，’Goodafternoon；ifitisnottroublingyou，Iwouldliketolookoverthehouse。’Wewerestandingintheoak—panelledhall。I
noticedthecarvedstaircaseaboutwhichthemaninthetrainhadtoldme，alsotheTudorfireplaces。ThatisallIhadtimetonotice。ThenextmomentIwaslyingonmybackinthemiddleofthegravelwiththedoorshut。Ilookedup。Isawtheoldmaniac’sheadstickingoutofalittlewindow。Itwasanevilface。Hehadaguninhishand。
\"’I’mgoingtocounttwenty，’hesaid。’Ifyouarenottheothersideofthegatebythen，Ishoot。’
\"Iranoverthefiguresmyselfonmywaytothegate。Imadeiteighteen。
\"Ihadanhourtowaitforthetrain。Italkedthematteroverwiththestation—master。
\"’Yes，’hesaid，’there’llbetroubleupthereoneofthesedays。’
\"Isaid，’Itseemstometohavebegun。’
\"Hesaid，’It’stheIndiansun。Itgetsintotheirheads。Wehaveoneortwointheneighbourhood。Theyarequietenoughtillsomethinghappens。’
\"’IfI’dbeentwosecondslonger，’Isaid，’Ibelievehe’dhavedoneit。’
\"’It’satakinghouse，’saidthestation—master；’nottoobigandnottoolittle。It’sthesortofhousepeopleseemtobelookingfor。’
\"’Idon’tenvy，’Isaid，’thenextpersonthatfindsit。’
\"’Hesettledhimselfdownhere，’saidthestation—master，’abouttenyearsago。Sincethen，ifonepersonhasofferedtotakethehouseoffhishands，Isupposeathousandhave。Atfirsthewouldlaughatthemgood—temperedly——explaintothemthathisideawastolivetherehimself，inpeaceandquietness，tillhedied。Twooutofeverythreeofthemwouldexpresstheirwillingnesstowaitforthat，andsuggestsomearrangementbywhichtheymightenterintopossession，say，aweekafterthefuneral。Thelastfewmonthsithasbeenworsethanever。Ireckonyou’reabouttheeighththathasbeenuptherethisweek，andto—dayonlyThursday。There’ssomethingtobesaid，youknow，fortheoldman。’\"
\"Anddidhe，\"askedDick——\"didheshootthenextpartythatcamealong？\"
\"Don’tbesosilly，Dick，\"saidRobin；\"it’sastory。Tellusanother，Pa。\"
\"Idon’tknowwhatyoumean，Robina，byastory，\"Isaid。\"Ifyoumeantoimply——\"
Robinasaidshedidn’t；butIknowquitewellshedid。BecauseIamanauthor，andhavetotellstoriesformyliving，peoplethinkI
don’tknowanytruth。Itisvexingenoughtobedoubtedwhenoneisexaggerating；tohavesneersflungatonebyone’sownkithandkinwhenoneisstrugglingtoconfineoneselftobald，barenarrative——
well，whereistheinducementtobetruthful？TherearetimeswhenI
almostsaytomyselfthatIwillnevertellthetruthagain。
\"Asithappens，\"Isaid，\"thestoryistrue，inmanyplaces。IpassoveryourindifferencetotheriskIran；thoughanicegirlatthepointwherethegunwasmentionedwouldhaveexpressedalarm。
Anyhow，attheendyoumighthavesaidsomethingmoresympatheticthanmerely，’Tellusanother。’Hedidnotshootthenextpartythatarrived，forthereasonthattheverynextdayhiswife，alarmedatwhathadhappened，wentuptoLondonandconsultedanexpert——nonetoosoon，asitturnedout。Thepooroldfellowdiedsixmonthslaterinaprivatelunaticasylum；Ihaditfromthestation—masteronpassingthroughthejunctionagainthisspring。Thehousefellintothepossessionofhisnephew，whoislivinginitnow。Heisayoungishmanwithalargefamily，andpeoplehavelearntthattheplaceisnotforsale。Itseemstomeratherasadstory。TheIndiansun，asthestation—masterthinks，mayhavestartedthetrouble；buttheendwasundoubtedlyhastenedbytheannoyancetowhichtheunfortunategentlemanhadbeensubjected；andImyselfmighthavebeenshot。Theonlythingthatcomfortsmeisthinkingofthatfool’sblackeye——thefoolthatsentmethere。\"
\"Andnoneoftheotherhouses，\"suggestedDick，\"wereanygoodatall？\"
\"Thereweredrawbacks，Dick，\"Iexplained。\"TherewasahouseinEssex；itwasoneofthefirstyourmotherandIinspected。InearlyshedtearsofjoywhenIreadtheadvertisement。Ithadoncebeenapriory。QueenElizabethhadsleptthereonherwaytoGreenwich。A
photographofthehouseaccompaniedtheadvertisement。Ishouldnothavebelievedthethinghaditbeenapicture。ItwasundertwelvemilesfromCharingCross。Theowner，itwasstated，wasopentooffers。\"
\"Allhumbug，Isuppose，\"suggestedDick。
\"Theadvertisement，ifanything，\"Ireplied，\"hadunder—estimatedtheattractivenessofthathouse。AllIblametheadvertisementforisthatitdidnotmentionotherthings。Itdidnotmention，forinstance，thatsinceQueenElizabeth’stimetheneighbourhoodhadchanged。Itdidnotmentionthattheentrancewasbetweenapublic—
houseonesideofthegateandafried—fishshopontheother；thattheGreatEasternRailway—Companyhadestablishedagoodsdepotatthebottomofthegarden；thatthedrawing—roomwindowslookedoutonextensivechemicalworks，andthedining—roomwindows，whichwereroundthecorner，onastonemason’syard。Thehouseitselfwasadream。\"
\"Butwhatisthesenseofit？\"demandedDick。\"Whatdohouseagentsthinkisthegoodofit？Dotheythinkpeoplelikelytotakeahouseafterreadingtheadvertisementwithoutevergoingtoseeit？\"
\"Iaskedanagentoncethatveryquestion，\"Ireplied。\"Hesaidtheydiditfirstandforemosttokeepupthespiritsoftheowner——themanwhowantedtosellthehouse。Hesaidthatwhenamanwastryingtopartwithahousehehadtolistentosomuchabuseofitfrompeoplewhocametoseeitthatifsomebodydidnotstickupforthehouse——sayallthatcouldbesaidforit，andglossoveritsdefects—
—hewouldendbybecomingsoashamedofithewouldwanttogiveitaway，orblowitupwithdynamite。Hesaidthatreadingtheadvertisementintheagent’scataloguewastheonlythingthatreconciledhimtobeingtheownerofthehouse。Hesaidoneclientofhishadbeentryingtosellhishouseforyears——untilonedayintheofficehereadbychancetheagent’sdescriptionofit。Uponwhichhewentstraighthome，tookdowntheboard，andhaslivedtherecontentedlyeversince。Fromthatpointofviewthereisreasoninthesystem；butforthehouse—hunteritworksbadly。
\"Oneagentsentmeaday’sjourneytoseeahousestandinginthemiddleofabrickfield，withaviewoftheGrandJunctionCanal。I
askedhimwherewastheriverhehadmentioned。Heexplaineditwastheothersideofthecanal，butonalowerlevel；thatwastheonlyreasonwhyfromthehouseyoucouldn’tseeit。Iaskedhimforhispicturesquescenery。Heexplaineditwasfartheron，roundthebend。
Heseemedtothinkmeunreasonable，expectingtofindeverythingI
wantedjustoutsidethefront—door。Hesuggestedmyshuttingoutthebrickfield——ifIdidn’tlikethebrickfield——withtrees。Hesuggestedtheeucalyptus—tree。Hesaiditwasarapidgrower。Healsotoldmethatityieldedgum。
\"AnotherhouseItravelleddownintoDorsetshiretosee。Itcontained，accordingtotheadvertisement，’perhapsthemostperfectspecimenofNormanarchextantinSouthernEngland。’ItwastobefoundmentionedinDugdale，anddatedfromthethirteenthcentury。I
don’tquiteknowwhatIexpected。Iarguedtomyselfthattheremusthavebeenruffiansofonlymoderatemeanseveninthosedays。Hereandtheresomerobberbaronwhohadstruckapoorlineofcountrywouldhavehadtobecontentwithahomelylittlecastle。Afewsuch，hiddenawayinunfrequenteddistricts，hadescapeddestruction。
Moreciviliseddescendantshadadaptedthemtolaterrequirements。I
hadinmymind，beforethetrainreachedDorchester，somethingbetweenaminiatureTowerofLondonandamediaevaleditionofAnnHathaway’scottageatStratford。Ipictureddungeonsandadrawbridge，perhapsasecretpassage。Lamchickhasasecretpassage，leadingfrombehindasortofportraitinthedining—roomtothebackofthekitchenchimney。Theyuseitforalinencloset。Itseemstomeapity。Ofcourseoriginallyitwentonfarther。Thevicar，whoisabitofanantiquarian，believesitcomesoutsomewhereinthechurchyard。ItellLamchickheoughttohaveitopenedup，buthiswifedoesn’twantittouched。Sheseemstothinkitjustrightasitis。Ihavealwayshadafancyforasecretpassage。IdecidedI
wouldhavethedrawbridgerepairedandmadepracticable。Flankedoneachsidewithflowersintubs，itwouldhavebeenanovelandpicturesqueapproach。\"
\"Wasthereadrawbridge？\"askedDick。
\"Therewasnodrawbridge，\"Iexplained。\"Theentrancetothehousewasthroughwhatthecaretakercalledtheconservatory。Itwasnotthesortofhousethatgoeswithadrawbridge。\"
\"ThenwhatabouttheNormanarches？\"arguedDick。
\"Notarches，\"Icorrectedhim；\"Arch。TheNormanarchwasdownstairsinthekitchen。Itwasthekitchen，thathadbeenbuiltinthethirteenthcentury——andhadnothadmuchdonetoitsince，apparently。Originally，Ishouldsay，ithadbeenthetorturechamber；itgaveyouthatidea。Ithinkyourmotherwouldhaveraisedobjectionstothekitchen——anyhow，whenshecametothinkofthecook。Itwouldhavebeennecessarytoputittothewomanbeforeengagingher：—
\"’Youdon’tmindcookinginadungeoninthedark，doyou？’
\"Somecookswould。TherestofthehousewaswhatIshoulddescribeaspresent—daymixedstyle。Thelasttenantbutonehadthrownoutabathroomincorrugatediron。\"
\"ThentherewasahouseinBerkshirethatItookyourmothertosee，withatroutstreamrunningthroughthegrounds。Iimaginedmyselfgoingoutafterlunch，catchingtroutfordinner；invitingswaggerfriendsdownto’mylittleplaceinBerkshire’forafewdays’trout—
fishing。ThereisamanIonceknewwhoisnowabaronet。Heusedtobekeenonfishing。IthoughtmaybeI’dgethim。ItwouldhavelookedwellintheLiteraryGossipcolumn：’Amongtheotherdistinguishedguests’——youknowthesortofthing。Ihadtheparagraphalreadyinmymind。ThewonderisIdidn’tbuyarod。\"
\"Wasn’tthereanytroutstream？\"questionedRobin。
\"Therewasastream，\"Ianswered；\"ifanything，toomuchstream。Thestreamwasthefirstthingyourmothernoticed。Shenoticeditaquarterofanhourbeforewecametoit——beforeweknewitwasthestream。Wedrovebacktothetown，andsheboughtasmelling—bottle，thelargersize。
\"Itgaveyourmotheraheadache，thatstream，andmadememad。Theagent’sofficewasoppositethestation。IallowedmyselfhalfanhouronmywaybacktotellhimwhatIthoughtofhim，andthenI
missedthetrain。Icouldhavegotitinifhehadletmetalkallthetime，buthewouldinterrupt。Hesaiditwasthepeopleatthepaper—mill——thathehadspokentothemaboutitmorethanonce；heseemedtothinksympathywasallIwanted。Heassuredme，onhiswordasahouse—agent，thatithadoncebeenatroutstream。Thefactwashistorical。IsaacWaltonhadfishedthere——thatwaspriortothepaper—mill。Hethoughtacollectionoftrout，maleandfemale，mightbeboughtandplacedinit；preferencebeinggiventosomehardybreedoftrout，accustomedtoroughingit。ItoldhimI
wasn’tlookingforaplacewhereIcouldplayatbeingNoah；andlefthim，asIexplainedtohim，withtheintentionofgoingstraighttomysolicitorsandinstitutingproceedingsagainsthimfortalkinglikeafool；andheputonhishatandwentacrosstohissolicitorstocommenceproceedingsagainstmeforlibel。
\"Isupposethat，withmyself，hethoughtbetterofitintheend。
ButI’mtiredofhavingmylifeturnedintooneperpetualfirstofApril。ThishousethatIhaveboughtisnotmyheart’sdesire，butaboutittherearepossibilities。Wewillputinlatticewindows，andfuss—upthechimneys。Maybewewillletinatabletoverthefront—door，withadate——alwayslookswell：itisapicturesquefigure，theold—fashionedfive。Bythetimewehavedonewithit——
forallpracticalpurposes——itwillbeaTudormanor—house。IhavealwayswantedanoldTudormanor—house。Thereisnoreason，sofarasIcansee，whythereshouldnotbestoriesconnectedwiththishouse。WhyshouldnotwehavearoominwhichSomebodyonceslept？
Wewon’thaveQueenElizabeth。I’mtiredofQueenElizabeth。
Besides，Idon’tbelieveshe’dhavebeennice。WhynotQueenAnne？
Aquiet，gentleoldlady，fromallaccounts，whowouldnothavegiventrouble。Or，betterstill，Shakespeare。HewasconstantlytoandfrobetweenLondonandStratford。Itwouldnothavebeensoverymuchoutofhisway。’TheroomwhereShakespeareslept！’Why，it’sanewidea。NobodyeverseemstohavethoughtofShakespeare。Thereisthefour—postbedstead。Yourmotherneverlikedit。Shewillinsist，itharboursthings。Wemighthangthewallwithscenesfromhisplays，andhaveabustoftheoldgentlemanhimselfoverthedoor。IfI’mleftaloneandnotworried，I’llprobablyendbybelievingthathereallydidsleepthere。\"
\"Whataboutcupboards？\"suggestedDick。\"TheLittleMotherwillclamourforcupboards。\"
Itisunexplainable，theaveragewoman’spassionforcupboards。Inheaven，herfirstrequest，Iamsure，isalways，\"CanIhaveacupboard？\"Shewouldkeepherhusbandandchildrenincupboardsifshehadherway：thatwouldbeherideaoftheperfecthome，everybodywrappedupwithapieceofcamphorinhisorherownpropercupboard。Iknewawomanoncewhowashappy——forawoman。Shelivedinahousewithtwenty—ninecupboards：Ithinkitmusthavebeenbuiltbyawoman。Theywerespaciouscupboards，manyofthem，withdoorsinnowaydifferentfromotherdoors。Visitorswouldwisheachothergood—nightanddisappearwiththeircandlesintocupboards，staggeringoutbackwardsthenextmoment，lookingscared。Onepoorgentleman，thiswoman’shusbandtoldme，havingtogodownstairsagainforsomethinghehadforgotten，andunableonhisreturntostrikeanythingelsebutcupboards，lostheartandfinishedupthenightinacupboard。Atbreakfast—timeguestswouldhurrydown，andburstopencupboarddoorswithacheery\"Good—morning。\"Whenthatwomanwasout，nobodyinthathouseeverknewwhereanythingwas；andwhenshecamehomesheherselfonlyknewwhereitoughttohavebeen。
Yetonce，whenoneofthosetwenty—ninecupboardshadtobeclearedouttemporarilyforrepairs，sheneversmiled，herhusbandtoldme，formorethanthreeweeks——nottilltheworkmenwereoutofthehouse，andthatcupboardinworkingorderagain。Shesaiditwassoconfusing，havingnowheretoputherthings。
Theaveragewomandoesnotwantahouse，intheordinarysenseoftheword。Whatshewantsissomethingmadebyagenii。Youhavefound，asyouthink，theidealhouse。YoushowhertheAdamsfireplaceinthedrawing—room。Youtapthewainscotingofthehallwithyourumbrella：\"Oak，\"youimpressuponher，\"alloak。\"Youdrawherattentiontotheview：youtellherthelocallegend。Byfixingherheadagainstthewindow—paneshecanseethetreeonwhichthemanwashanged。Youdwelluponthesundial；youmentionforasecondtimetheAdamsfireplace。
\"It’sallverynice，\"sheanswers，\"butwherearethechildrengoingtosleep？\"
Itissodisheartening。
Ifitisn’tthechildren，it’sthewater。Shewantswater——wantstoknowwhereitcomesfrom。Youshowherwhereitcomesfrom。
\"What，outofthatnastyplace！\"sheexclaims。
Sheisequallydissatisfiedwhetheritbedrawnfromawell，orwhetheritbewaterthathasfallenfromheavenandbeenstoredintanks。ShehasnofaithinNature’swater。Awomanneverbelievesthatwatercanbegoodthatdoesnotcomefromawater—works。HerideaappearstobethattheCompanymakesitfresheverymorningfromsomeoldfamilyrecipe。
Ifyoudosucceedinreconcilinghertothewater，thenshefeelssurethatthechimneyssmoke；theylookasiftheysmoked。Why——asyoutellher——thechimneysarethebestpartofthehouse。Youtakeheroutsideandmakeherlookatthem。Theyaregenuinesixteenth—
centurychimneys，withcarvingonthem。Theycouldn’tsmoke。Theywouldn’tdoanythingsoinartistic。Shesayssheonlyhopesyouareright，andsuggestscowls，iftheydo。
Afterthatshewantstoseethekitchen——where’sthekitchen？Youdon’tknowwhereitis。Youdidn’tbotheraboutthekitchen。Theremustbeakitchen，ofcourse。Youproceedtosearchforthekitchen。
Whenyoufinditsheisworriedbecauseitistheoppositeendofthehousetothedining—room。Youpointouttohertheadvantageofbeingawayfromthesmellofthecooking。Atthatshegetspersonal：
tellsyouthatyouarethefirsttogrumblewhenthedinneriscold；
andinhermadnessaccusesthewholemalesexofbeingimpractical。
Themeresightofanemptyhousemakesawomanfretful。
Ofcoursethestoveiswrong。Thekitchenstovealwaysiswrong。
Youpromisesheshallhaveanewone。Sixmonthslatershewillwanttheoldonebackagain：butitwouldbecrueltotellherthis。Thepromiseofthatnewstovecomfortsher。Thewomanneverloseshopethatonedayitwillcome——theall—satisfyingkitchenstove，thestoveofhergirlishdreams。
Thequestionofthestovesettled，youimagineyouhavesilencedallopposition。Atonceshebeginstotalkaboutthingsthatnobodybutawomanorasanitaryinspectorcantalkaboutwithoutblushing。
Itcallsfortact，gettingawomanintoanewhouse。Sheisnervous，suspicious。
\"Iamglad，mydearDick，\"Ianswered；\"thatyouhavementionedcupboards。ItiswithcupboardsthatIamhopingtolureyourmother。Thecupboards，fromherpointofview，willbetheonebrightspot；therearefourteenofthem。Iamtrustingtocupboardstotidemeovermanythings。Ishallwantyoutocomewithme，Dick。
Wheneveryourmotherbeginsasentencewith：’Butnowtobepractical，dear，’Iwantyoutomurmursomethingaboutcupboards——notirritatinglyasifithadbeenprearranged：havealittlegumption。\"
\"Willthereberoomforatenniscourt？\"demandedDick。
\"Anexcellenttenniscourtalreadyexists，\"Iinformedhim。\"Ihavealsopurchasedtheadjoiningpaddock。Weshallbeabletokeepourowncow。Maybewe’llbreedhorses。\"
\"Wemighthaveacroquetlawn，\"suggestedRobin。
\"Wemighteasilyhaveacroquetlawn，\"Iagreed。\"Onafull—sizedlawnIbelieveVeronicamightbetaughttoplay。Therearenaturesthatdemandspace。Onafull—sizedlawn，protectedbyastoutironborder，lesstimemightbewastedexploringthesurroundingsceneryforVeronica’slostball。\"
\"Nochanceofagolflinksanywhereintheneighbourhood？\"fearedDick。
\"Iamnotsosure，\"Ianswered。\"Barelyamileawaythereisaprettypieceofgorselandthatappearstobenogoodtoanyone。I
daresayforareasonableoffer——\"
\"Isay，whenwillthisshowbeready？\"interruptedDick。
\"Iproposebeginningthealterationsatonce，\"Iexplained。\"Bylucktherehappenstobeagamekeeper’scottagevacantandwithindistance。Theagentisgoingtogetmetheuseofitforayear——aprimitivelittleplace，butcharminglysituateontheedgeofawood。
Ishallfurnishacoupleofrooms；andforpartofeveryweekIshallmakeapointofbeingdownthere，superintending。Ihavealwaysbeenconsideredgoodatsuperintending。MypoorfatherusedtosayitwastheonlyworkIseemedtotakeaninterestin。BybeingonthespottohurryeverybodyonIhopetohavethe’show，’asyoutermit，readybythespring。\"
\"Ishallnevermarry，\"saidRobin。
\"Don’tbesoeasilydiscouraged，\"advisedDick；\"youarestillyoung。\"
\"Idon’teverwanttogetmarried，\"continuedRobin。\"Ishouldonlyquarrelwithmyhusband，ifIdid。AndDickwillneverdoanything——
notwithhishead。\"
\"ForgivemeifIamdull，\"Ipleaded，\"butwhatistheconnectionbetweenthishouse，yourquarrelswithyourhusbandifyouevergetone，andDick’shead？\"
Bywayofexplanation，Robinsprangtotheground，andbeforehecouldstopherhadflungherarmsaroundDick’sneck。
\"Wecan’thelpit，Dickdear，\"shetoldhim。\"Cleverparentsalwayshaveduffingchildren。Butwe’llbeofsomeuseintheworldafterall，youandI。\"
TheideawasthatDick，whenhehadfinishedfailinginexaminations，shouldgoouttoCanadaandstartafarm，takingRobinwithhim。
Theywouldbreedcattle，andgallopovertheprairies，andcampoutintheprimevalforest，andslideaboutonsnow—shoes，andcarrycanoesontheirbacks，andshootrapids，andstalkthings——sofarasIcouldgather，haveasortofeverlastingBuffalo—Bill’sshowalltothemselves。Howandwhenthefarmworkwastogetitselfdonewasnotatallclear。TheLittleMotherandmyselfweretoendourdayswiththem。Weweretositaboutinthesunforatime，andthenpasspeacefullyaway。Robinshedafewtearsatthispoint，butregainedherspirits，thinkingofVeronica，whowastobeluredoutonavisitandmarriedtosometrue—heartedyeoman：whichisnotatpresentVeronica’sambition。Veronica’sconvictionisthatshewouldlookwellinacoronet：herownideaissomethingintheducalline。