Deputationsfromthefellahsandpeasantscomeperpetuallybeforetheaugustpresence，tocomplainofthecrueltyandexactionsofthechiefssetoverthem：but，asitisknownthattheArabneverwillpaywithoutthebastinado，theircomplaints，forthemostpart，meetwithbutlittleattention。HisHighness’streasurymustbefilled，andhisofficerssupportedintheirauthority。
However，therewasonevillage，ofwhichthecomplaintsweresopathetic，andtheinhabitantssosupremelywretched，thattheRoyalindignationwasmovedattheirstory，andthechiefofthevillage，SkinflintBeg，wascalledtogiveanaccountofhimselfatCairo。
Whenhecamebeforethepresence，MehemetAlireproachedhimwithhishorriblecrueltyandexactions；askedhimhowhedaredtotreathisfaithfulandbelovedsubjectsinthisway，andthreatenedhimwithdisgrace，andtheutterconfiscationofhisproperty，forthushavingreducedadistricttoruin。
\"YourHighnesssaysIhavereducedthesefellahstoruin，\"saidSkinflintBeg：\"whatisthebestwaytoconfoundmyenemies，andtoshowyouthefalsehoodoftheiraccusationsthatIhaveruinedthem？——Tobringmoremoneyfromthem。IfIbringyoufivehundredpursesfrommyvillage，willyouacknowledgethatmypeoplearenotruinedyet？\"
TheheartofthePashawastouched：\"Iwillhavenomorebastinadoing，OSkinflintBeg；youhavetorturedthesepoorpeoplesomuch，andhavegotsolittlefromthem，thatmyRoyalheartrelentsforthepresent，andIwillhavethemsuffernofarther。\"
\"Givemefreeleave——givemeyourHighness’sgraciouspardon，andI
willbringthefivehundredpursesassurelyasmynameisSkinflintBeg。Idemandonlythetimetogohome，thetimetoreturn，andafewdaystostay，andIwillcomebackashonestlyasRegulusPashadidtotheCarthaginians，——IwillcomebackandmakemyfacewhitebeforeyourHighness。\"
SkinflintBeg’sprayerforareprievewasgranted，andhereturnedtohisvillage，whereheforthwithcalledtheelderstogether。\"O
friends，\"hesaid，\"complaintsofourpovertyandmiseryhavereachedtheRoyalthrone，andthebenevolentheartoftheSovereignhasbeenmeltedbythewordsthathavebeenpouredintohisears。
’MyheartyearnstowardsmypeopleofElMuddee，’hesays；’Ihavethoughthowtorelievetheirmiseries。NearthemliesthefruitfullandofElGuanee。Itisrichinmaizeandcotton，insesameandbarley；itisworthathousandpurses；butIwillletittomychildrenforsevenhundred，andIwillgiveovertherestoftheprofittothem，asanalleviationfortheiraffliction。’\"
TheeldersofElMuddeeknewthegreatvalueandfertilityofthelandsofGuanee，buttheydoubtedthesincerityoftheirgovernor，who，however，dispelledtheirfears，andadroitlyquickenedtheireagernesstoclosewiththeprofferedbargain。\"Iwillmyselfadvancetwohundredandfiftypurses，\"hesaid；\"doyoutakecounselamongyourselves，andsubscribetheotherfivehundred；andwhenthesumisready，adeputationofyoushallcarryittoCairo，andIwillcomewithmyshare；andwewilllaythewholeatthefeetofHisHighness。\"Sothegrey-beardedonesofthevillageadvisedwithoneanother；andthosewhohadbeeninaccessibletobastinadoes，somehowfoundmoneyatthecallingofinterest；andtheSheikh，andthey，andthefivehundredpurses，setoffontheroadtothecapital。
Whentheyarrived，SkinflintBegandtheeldersofElMuddeesoughtadmissiontotheRoyalthrone，andtherelaiddowntheirpurses。
\"Hereisyourhumbleservant’scontribution，\"saidSkinflint，producinghisshare；\"andhereistheofferingofyourloyalvillageofElMuddee。DidInotbeforesaythatenemiesanddeceivershadmalignedmebeforetheaugustpresence，pretendingthatnotapiastrewasleftinmyvillage，andthatmyextortionhadentirelydenudedthepeasantry？See！hereisproofthatthereisplentyofmoneystillinElMuddee：intwelvehourstheeldershavesubscribedfivehundredpurses，andlaythematthefeetoftheirlord。\"
Insteadofthebastinado，SkinflintBegwasinstantlyrewardedwiththeRoyalfavour，andtheformermarkofattentionwasbestoweduponthefellahswhohadmalignedhim；SkinflintBegwaspromotedtotherankofSkinflintBey；andhismannerofextractingmoneyfromhispeoplemaybestudiedwithadmirationinapartoftheUnitedKingdom。{3}
AtthetimeoftheSyrianquarrel，andwhen，apprehendingsomegeneralrupturewithEngland，thePashawishedtoraisethespiritofthefellahs，andreleverlamoralenationale，heactuallymadeoneoftheastonishedArabsacolonel。Hedegradedhimthreedaysafterpeacewasconcluded。TheyoungEgyptiancolonel，whotoldmethis，laughedandenjoyedthejokewiththeutmostgusto。\"Isitnotashame，\"hesaid，\"tomakemeacolonelatthree-and-twenty；
I，whohavenoparticularmerit，andhaveneverseenanyservice？\"
Deathhassincestoppedthemodestandgood-naturedyoungfellow’sfurtherpromotion。Thedeathof——BeywasannouncedintheFrenchpapersafewweeksback。
Myabovekind-heartedandagreeableyounginformantusedtodiscourse，inoureveningsintheLazarettoatMalta，veryeloquentlyaboutthebeautyofhiswife，whomhehadleftbehindhimatCairo——herbrownhair，herbrilliantcomplexion，andherblueeyes。ItisthisCircassianblood，Isuppose，towhichtheTurkisharistocracythatgovernsEgyptmustbeindebtedforthefairnessoftheirskin。IbrahimPasha，ridingbyinhisbarouche，lookedlikeabluffjolly-facedEnglishdragoonofficer，withagreymoustacheandredcheeks，suchasyoumightseeonafield-dayatMaidstone。AllthenumerousofficialsridingthroughthetownwerequiteasfairasEuropeans。Wemadeacquaintancewithonedignitary，averyjovialandfatPasha，theproprietoroftheinn，Ibelieve，whowascontinuallyloungingabouttheEzbekiehgarden，andwho，butforaslightJewishcastofcountenance，mighthavepassedanydayforaFrenchman。Theladieswhomwesawwereequallyfair；thatis，theveryslightparticlesofthepersonsofladieswhichourluckyeyeswerepermittedtogazeon。Theselovelycreaturesgothroughthetownbypartiesofthreeorfour，mountedondonkeys，andattendedbyslavesholdingonatthecrupper，toreceivethelovelyriderslesttheyshouldfall，andshoutingoutshrillcriesof\"Schmaalek，\"\"Ameenek\"（orhoweverelsethesewordsmaybepronounced），andfloggingoffthepeoplerightandleftwiththebuffalo-thong。ButthedearcreaturesareevenmorecloselydisguisedthanatConstantinople：theirbodiesareenvelopedwithalargeblacksilkhood，likeacab-head；thefashionseemedtobetospreadtheirarmsout，andgivethiscoveringalltheamplitudeofwhichitwascapable，astheyleeredandogledyoufromundertheirblackmaskswiththeirbigrollingeyes。
Everybodyhasbigrollingeyeshere（unless，tobesure，theyloseoneofophthalmia）。TheArabwomenaresomeofthenoblestfiguresIhaveeverseen。Thehabitofcarryingjarsontheheadalwaysgivesthefiguregraceandmotion；andthedressthewomenwearcertainlydisplaysittofulladvantage。Ihavebroughtacompleteonehomewithme，attheserviceofanyladyforamasquedball。
Itconsistsofacoarsebluedressofcalico，openinfront，andfastenedwithahornbutton。Threeyardsofbluestuffforaveil；
onthetopoftheveilajartobebalancedonthehead；andalittleblackstripofsilktofalloverthenose，andleavethebeautifuleyesfulllibertytorollandroam。Butsuchacostume，notaidedbyanystaysoranyotherarticleofdresswhatever，canbewornonlybyaverygoodfigure。Isuspectitwon’tbeborrowedformanyballsnextseason。
Themen，atall，handsome，noblerace，aretreatedlikedogs。I
shallneverforgetridingthroughthecrowdedbazaars，myinterpreter，orlaquais-de-place，aheadofmetocleartheway——
whenhetookhiswhip，andstruckitovertheshouldersofamanwhocouldnotorwouldnotmakeway！
Themanturnedround——anold，venerable，handsomeface，withawfullysadeyes，andabeardlongandquitegrey。Hedidnotmaketheleastcomplaint，butslunkoutoftheway，piteouslyshakinghisshoulder。Thesightofthatindignitygavemeasickeningfeelingofdisgust。Ishoutedouttothecursedlackeytoholdhishand，andforbadehimeverinmypresencetostrikeoldoryoungmore；buteverybodyisdoingit。Thewhipisineverybody’shands：
thePasha’srunningfootman，ashegoesbustlingthroughthebazaar；thedoctor’sattendant，ashesoberlythreadsthecrowdonhismare；thenegroslave，whoisridingbyhimself，themostinsolentofall，strikesandslashesaboutwithoutmercy，andyouneverhearasinglecomplaint。
Howtodescribethebeautyofthestreetstoyou！——thefantasticsplendour；thevarietyofthehouses，andarchways，andhangingroofs，andbalconies，andporches；thedelightfulaccidentsoflightandshadewhichchequerthem：thenoise，thebustle，thebrilliancyofthecrowd；theinterminablevastbazaarswiththeirbarbaricsplendour。ThereisafortunetobemadeforpaintersinCairo，andmaterialsforawholeAcademyofthem。Ineversawsuchavarietyofarchitecture，oflife，ofpicturesqueness，ofbrilliantcolour，andlightandshade。Thereisapictureineverystreet，andateverybazaarstall。Someoftheseourcelebratedwater-colourpainter，Mr。Lewis，hasproducedwithadmirabletruthandexceedingminutenessandbeauty；butthereisroomforahundredtofollowhim；andshouldanyartist（bysomerareoccurrence）readthis，whohasleisure，andwantstobreaknewground，lethimtakeheart，andtryawinterinCairo，wherethereisthefinestclimateandthebestsubjectsforhispencil。
Aseriesofstudiesofnegroesalonewouldformapicturebook，delightfullygrotesque。Mountingmydonkeyto-day，Itookaridetothedesolatenobleoldbuildingsoutsidethecity，knownastheTombsoftheCaliphs。Everyoneoftheseedifices，withtheirdomes，andcourts，andminarets，isstrangeandbeautiful。Inoneofthemtherewasanencampmentofnegroslavesnewlyarrived：
somescoresofthemwerehuddledagainstthesunnywall；twoorthreeoftheirmastersloungedaboutthecourt，orlaysmokinguponcarpets。Therewasoneofthesefellows，astraight-nosedebony-
facedAbyssinian，withanexpressionofsuchsinistergood-humourinhishandsomefaceaswouldformaperfecttypeofvillany。Hesatleeringatme，overhiscarpet，asIendeavouredtogetasketchofthatincarnaterascality。\"Givemesomemoney，\"saidthefellow。\"Iknowwhatyouareabout。YouwillsellmypictureformoneywhenyougetbacktoEurope；letmehavesomeofitnow！\"
Buttheveryrudeandhumbledesignerwasquiteunabletodepictsuchaconsummationandperfectionofroguery；soflunghimacigar，whichhebegantosmoke，grinningatthegiver。Irequestedtheinterpretertoinformhim，bywayofassuranceofmydisinterestedness，thathisfacewasagreatdealtoouglytobepopularinEurope，andthatwastheparticularreasonwhyIhadselectedit。
Thenoneofhiscompanionsgotupandshowedushisblackcattle。
Themaleslaveswerechieflylads，andthewomenyoung，wellformed，andabominablyhideous。Thedealerpulledherblanketoffoneofthem，andbadeherstandup，whichshedidwithagreatdealofshudderingmodesty。Shewascoalblack，herlipswerethesizeofsausages，hereyeslargeandgood-humoured；thehairorwoolonthisyoungperson’sheadwascurledandgreasedintoathousandfilthylittleringlets。Shewasevidentlythebeautyoftheflock。
Theyarenotunhappy：theylooktobeingbought，asmanyaspinsterlookstoanestablishmentinEngland；onceinafamilytheyarekindlytreatedandwellclothed，andfatten，andarethemerriestpeopleofthewholecommunity。ThesewereofamuchmoresavagesortthantheslavesIhadseeninthehorriblemarketatConstantinople，whereIrecollectthefollowingyoungcreature——{2}
（indeeditisaveryfairlikenessofher）whilstIwaslookingatherandformingpatheticconjecturesregardingherfate——smilingverygood-humouredly，andbiddingtheinterpreteraskmetobuyherfortwentypounds。
FromtheseTombsoftheCaliphstheDesertisbeforeyou。Itcomesuptothewallsofthecity，andstopsatsomegardenswhichspringupallofasuddenatitsedge。YoucanseethefirstStation-
houseontheSuezRoad；andsofromdistance-pointtopoint，couldridethitheralonewithoutaguide。
Asinustrottedgallantlyintothisdesertforthespaceofaquarterofanhour。Therewewere（takingcaretokeepourbacktothecitywalls），intherealactualdesert：moundsuponmoundsofsand，stretchingawayasfarastheeyecansee，untilthedrearyprospectfadesawayintheyellowhorizon！Ihadformedafinerideaofitoutof\"Eothen。\"Perhapsinasimoomitmaylookmoreawful。TheonlyadventurethatbefellinthisromanticplacewasthatAsinus’slegswentdeepintoahole：whereuponhisriderwentoverhishead，andbitthesand，andmeasuredhislengththere；anduponthishintroseup，androdehomeagain。Nodoubtoneshouldhavegoneoutforacoupleofdays’march——asitwas，thedesertdidnotseemtomesublime，onlyUNCOMFORTABLE。
Verysoonafterthisperilousadventurethesunlikewisedippedintothesand（butnottorisetherefromsoquicklyasIhaddone）；
andIsawthisdailyphenomenonofsunsetwithpleasure，forIwasengagedatthathourtodinewithouroldfriendJ-，whohasestablishedhimselfhereinthemostcompleteOrientalfashion。
YourememberJ-，andwhatadandyhewas，thefaultlessnessofhisbootsandcravats，thebrilliancyofhiswaistcoatsandkid-gloves；
wehaveseenhissplendourinRegentStreet，intheTuileries，orontheToledo。Myfirstobjectonarrivingherewastofindouthishouse，whichhehastakenfarawayfromthehauntsofEuropeancivilisation，intheArabquarter。Itissituatedinacool，shady，narrowalley；sonarrow，thatitwaswithgreatdifficulty——
HisHighnessIbrahimPashahappeningtopassatthesamemoment——
thatmylittleprocessionoftwodonkeys，mountedbyselfandvalet-de-place，withthetwodonkey-boysourattendants，couldrangeourselvesalongthewall，andleaveroomfortheaugustcavalcade。HisHighnesshavingrushedon（withanaffableandgood-humouredsalutetoourimposingparty），wemadeJ。’squarters；
and，inthefirstplace，enteredabroadcoveredcourtorporch，whereaswarthytawnyattendant，dressedinblue，withwhiteturban，keepsaperpetualwatch。ServantsintheEastlieaboutallthedoors，itappears；andyouclapyourhands，astheydointhedearold\"ArabianNights，\"tosummonthem。
Thisservantdisappearedthroughanarrowwicket，whichheclosedafterhim；andwentintotheinnerchambers，toaskifhislordwouldreceiveus。Hecamebackpresently，andrisingupfrommydonkey，Iconfidedhimtohisattendant（ladsmoresharp，arch，andwickedthanthesedonkey-boysdon’twalkthepaveofParisorLondon），andpassedthemysteriousouterdoor。
Firstwecameintoabroadopencourt，withacoveredgalleryrunningalongonesideofit。Acamelwasrecliningonthegrassthere；nearhimwasagazelle，togladJ-withhisdarkblueeye；
andanumerousbroodofhensandchickens，whofurnishhisliberaltable。Ontheoppositesideofthecoveredgalleryroseupthewallsofhislong，queer，many-windowed，many-galleriedhouse。
Therewerewoodenlatticestothosearchedwindows，throughthediamondsofoneofwhichIsawtwoofthemostbeautiful，enormous，oglingblackeyesintheworld，lookingdownupontheinterestingstranger。Pigeonswereflapping，andhopping，andfluttering，andcooingabout。Happypigeons，youare，nodoubt，fedwithcrumbsfromthehenne-tippedfingersofZuleika！Allthiscourt，cheerfulinthesunshine，cheerfulwiththeastonishingbrilliancyoftheeyespeeringoutfromthelattice-bars，wasasmouldy，ancient，andruinous——asanygentleman’shouseinIreland，letussay。Thepaintwaspeelingoffthericketyoldcarvedgalleries；thearabesquesoverthewindowswerechippedandworn；——theancientnessoftheplacerendereditdoublypicturesque。Ihavedetainedyoualongtimeintheoutercourt。WhythedeucewasZuleikathere，withthebeautifulblackeyes？
Hencewepassedintoalargeapartment，wheretherewasafountain；
andanotherdomesticmadehisappearance，takingmeincharge，andrelievingthetawnyporterofthegate。Thisfellowwascladinbluetoo，witharedsashandagreybeard。Heconductedmeintoagreathall，wheretherewasagreat，largeSaracenicorielwindow。
Heseatedmeonadivan；andstalkingoff，foramoment，returnedwithalongpipeandabrasschafing-dish：heblewthecoalforthepipe，whichhemotionedmetosmoke，andleftmetherewitharespectfulbow。Thisdelay，thismysteryofservants，thatoutercourtwiththecamels，gazelles，andotherbeautiful-eyedthings，affectedmeprodigiouslyallthetimehewasstayingaway；andwhileIwasexaminingthestrangeapartmentanditscontents，myrespectandawefortheownerincreasedvastly。
AsyouwillbegladtoknowhowanOrientalnobleman（suchasJ——
undoubtedlyis）islodgedandgarnished，letmedescribethecontentsofthishallofaudience。Itisaboutfortyfeetlong，andeighteenortwentyhigh。Alltheceilingiscarved，gilt，paintedandembroideredwitharabesques，andchoicesentencesofEasternwriting。SomeMamelukeAga，orBey，whomMehemetAliinvitedtobreakfastandmassacred，wastheproprietorofthismansiononce：ithasgrowndingier，but，perhaps，handsomer，sincehistime。Oppositethedivanisagreatbay-window，withadivanlikewiseroundtheniche。ItlooksoutuponagardenaboutthesizeofFountainCourt，Temple；surroundedbythetallhousesofthequarter。Thegardenisfullofgreen。Agreatpalm-treespringsupinthemidst，withplentifulshrubberies，andatalkingfountain。Theroombesidethedivanisfurnishedwithonedealtable，valuefiveshillings；fourwoodenchairs，valuesixshillings；andacoupleofmatsandcarpets。ThetableandchairsareluxuriesimportedfromEurope。TheregularOrientaldinnerisputuponcoppertrays，whicharelaiduponlowstools。HenceJ-
Effendi’shousemaybesaidtobemuchmoresumptuouslyfurnishedthanthoseoftheBeysandAgashisneighbours。
Whenthesethingshadbeenexaminedatleisure，J-appeared。Coulditbetheexquisiteofthe\"Europa\"andthe\"TroisFreres\"？Aman——
inalongyellowgown，withalongbeardsomewhattingedwithgrey，withhisheadshaved，andwearingonit，first，awhitewaddedcottonnightcap；second，aredtarboosh——madehisappearanceandwelcomedmecordially。Itwassometime，astheAmericanssay，beforeIcould\"realise\"thesemillantJ-ofoldtimes。
Heshuffledoffhisouterslippersbeforehecurleduponthedivanbesideme。Heclappedhishands，andlanguidlycalled\"Mustapha。\"
Mustaphacamewithmorelights，pipes，andcoffee；andthenwefelltotalkingaboutLondon，andIgavehimthelastnewsofthecomradesinthatdearcity。Aswetalked，hisOrientalcoolnessandlanguorgavewaytoBritishcordiality；hewasthemostamusingcompanionofthecluboncemore。
Hehasadaptedhimselfoutwardly，however，totheOrientallife。
Whenhegoesabroadheridesagreyhorsewithredhousings，andhastwoservantstowalkbesidehim。Hewearsaveryhandsomegravecostumeofdarkblue，consistingofanembroideredjacketandgaiters，andapairoftrousers，whichwouldmakeasetofdressesforanEnglishfamily。Hisbeardcurlsnoblyoverhischest，hisDamascusscimitaronhisthigh。HisredcapgiveshimavenerableandBey-likeappearance。Thereisnogewgaworparadeabouthim，asinsomeofyourdandifiedyoungAgas。IshouldsaythatheisaMajor-GeneralofEngineers，oragraveofficerofState。WeandtheTurkifiedEuropean，whofoundusatdinner，satsmokinginsolemndivan。
Hisdinnerswereexcellent；theywerecookedbyaregularEgyptianfemalecook。Wehaddelicatecucumbersstuffedwithforced-meats；
yellowsmokingpilaffs，theprideoftheOrientalcuisine；kidandfowlsal’AboukirandalaPyramide：anumberoflittlesavouryplatesoflegumesofthevegetable-marrowsort：kibobswithanexcellentsauceofplumsandpiquantherbs。Weendedtherepastwithrubypomegranates，pulledtopieces，deliciouslycoolandpleasant。Forthemeats，wecertainlyatethemwiththeInfidelknifeandfork；butforthefruit，weputourhandsintothedishandflickedthemintoourmouthsinwhatcannotbutbethetrueOrientalmanner。Iaskedforlambandpistachio-nuts，andcream-
tartsaupoivre；butJ。’scookdidnotfurnishuswitheitherofthosehistoricdishes。Andfordrink，wehadwaterfreshenedintheporouslittlepotsofgreyclay，atwhosespouteverytravellerintheEasthassuckeddelighted。Also，itmustbeconfessed，wedrankcertainsherbets，preparedbythetwogreatrivals，HadjiHodsonandBassBey——thebitterestandmostdeliciousofdraughts！
OdivineHodson！acamel’sloadofthybeercamefromBeyrouttoJerusalemwhilewewerethere。HowshallIeverforgetthejoyinspiredbyoneofthosefoamingcoolflasks？
Wedon’tknowtheluxuryofthirstinEnglishclimes。Sedentarymenincitiesatleasthaveseldomascertainedit；butwhentheytravel，ourcountrymenguardagainstitwell。TheroadbetweenCairoandSuezisjonchewithsoda-watercorks。TomThumbandhisbrothersmighttracktheirwayacrossthedesertbythoselandmarks。
Cairoismagnificentlypicturesque：itisfinetohavepalm-treesinyourgardens，andrideaboutonacamel；but，afterall，IwasanxioustoknowwhatweretheparticularexcitementsofEasternlife，whichdetainedJ-，whoisatown-bredman，fromhisnaturalpleasuresandoccupationsinLondon；wherehisfamilydon’thearfromhim，wherehisroomisstillkeptreadyathome，andhisnameisonthelistofhisclub；andwherehisneglectedsisterstrembletothinkthattheirFrederickisgoingaboutwithagreatbeardandacrookedsword，dresseduplikeanodiousTurk。Ina\"lark\"suchacostumemaybeverywell；buthome，London，arazor，yoursistertomaketea，apairofmoderateChristianbreechesinlieuofthoseenormousTurkishshulwars，arevastlymoreconvenientinthelongrun。Whatwasitthatkepthimawayfromthesedecentandaccustomeddelights？
Itcouldn’tbetheblackeyesinthebalcony——uponhishonourshewasonlytheblackcook，whohasdonethepilaff，andstuffedthecucumbers。No，itwasanindulgenceoflazinesssuchasEuropeans，Englishmen，atleast，don’tknowhowtoenjoy。HereheliveslikealanguidLotus-eater——adreamy，hazy，lazy，tobaccofiedlife。Hewasawayfromeveningparties，hesaid：heneedn’twearwhitekidgloves，orstarchedneckcloths，orreadanewspaper。AndeventhislifeatCairowastoocivilisedforhim：Englishmenpassedthrough；oldacquaintanceswouldcall：thegreatpleasureofpleasureswaslifeinthedesert，——underthetents，withstillmorenothingtodothaninCairo；nowsmoking，nowcanteringonArabs，andnocrowdtojostleyou；solemncontemplationsofthestarsatnight，asthecamelswerepicketed，andthefiresandthepipeswerelighted。
Thenight-sceneinthecityisverystrikingforitsvastnessandloneliness。Everybodyhasgonetorestlongbeforeteno’clock。
Therearenolightsintheenormousbuildings；onlythestarsblazingabove，withtheirastonishingbrilliancy，inthebluepeacefulsky。Yourguidescarryacoupleoflittlelanternswhichredoublethedarknessinthesolitaryechoingstreet。Mysteriouspeoplearecurledupandsleepingintheporches。Apatrolofsoldierspasses，andhailsyou。Thereisalightyetinonemosque，wheresomedevoteesareatprayersallnight；andyouhearthequeerestnasalmusicproceedingfromthosepiousbelievers。Asyoupassthemadhouse，thereisonepoorfellowstilltalkingtothemoon——nosleepforhim。Hehowlsandsingsthereallthenight——quitecheerfully，however。Hehasnotlosthisvanitywithhisreason：heisaPrinceinspiteofthebarsandthestraw。
Whattosayaboutthosefamousedifices，whichhasnotbeenbettersaidelsewhere？——butyouwillnotbelievethatwevisitedthem，unlessIbringsometokenfromthem。Hereisone：-{2}
Thatwhite-cappedladskippedupthestoneswithajugofwaterinhishand，torefreshwearyclimbers；andsquattinghimselfdownonthesummit，wasdesignedasyousee。Thevastflatlandscapestretchesbehindhim；thegreatwindingriver；thepurplecity，withforts，anddomes，andspires；thegreenfields，andpalm-
groves，andspeckledvillages；theplainsstillcoveredwithshininginundations——thelandscapestretchesfarfaraway，untilitislostandmingledinthegoldenhorizon。Itispoorworkthislandscape-paintinginprint。Shelley’stwosonnetsarethebestviewsthatIknowofthePyramids——betterthanthereality；foramanmaylaydownthebook，andinquietfancyconjureupapictureoutofthesemagnificentwords，whichshan’tbedisturbedbyanypettinessesormeanrealities，——suchastheswarmsofhowlingbeggars，whojostleyouabouttheactualplace，andscreaminyourearsincessantly，andhangonyourskirts，andbawlformoney。
TheridetothePyramidsisoneofthepleasantestpossible。Inthefalloftheyear，thoughtheskyisalmostcloudlessaboveyou，thesunisnottoohottobear；andthelandscape，refreshedbythesubsidinginundations，delightfullygreenandcheerful。Wemadeupapartyofsomehalf-dozenfromthehotel，alady（thekindsoda-
waterprovider，forwhosehospitalitythemostgratefulcomplimentsareherebyoffered）beingofthecompany，bentliketherestupongoingtothesummitofCheops。Thosewhowerecautiousandwise，tookabraceofdonkeys。Atleastfivetimesduringtheroutedidmyanimalsfallwithme，causingmetorepeatthedesertexperimentoveragain，butwithmoresuccess。Thespacebetweenamoderatepairoflegsandtheground，isnotmanyinches。Byeschewingstirrups，thedonkeycouldfall，andtherideralightontheground，withthegreatesteaseandgrace。Almosteverybodywasdownandupagaininthecourseoftheday。
WepassedthroughtheEzbekiehandbythesuburbsofthetown，wherethegarden-housesoftheEgyptiannoblessearesituated，toOldCairo，whereaferry-boattookthewholepartyacrosstheNile，withthatnoiseandbawlingvolubilityinwhichtheArabpeopleseemtobesounlikethegraveandsilentTurks；andsotookourcourseforsomeeightortenmilesoverthedevioustractwhichthestilloutlyingwatersobligedustopursue。ThePyramidswereinsightthewholeway。Oneortwothinsilverycloudswerehoveringoverthem，andcastingdelicaterosyshadowsuponthegrandsimpleoldpiles。AlongthetrackwesawascoreofpleasantpicturesofEasternlife：-ThePasha’shorsesandslavesstoodcaparisonedathisdoor；atthegateofonecountry-house，Iamsorrytosay，theBey’sGIGwasinwaiting，——amostunromanticchariot；thehusbandmenwerecomingintothecity，withtheirstringsofdonkeysandtheirloads；astheyarrived，theystoppedandsuckedatthefountain：acolumnofred-cappedtroopspassedtodrill，withslouchedgait，whiteuniforms，andglitteringbayonets。Thenwehadthepicturesatthequay：theferryboat，andthered-sailedriver-boat，gettingunderway，andboundupthestream。Therewasthegrainmarket，andthehutsontheoppositeside；andthatbeautifulwoman，withsilverarmlets，andafacethecolourofgold，which（thenose-baghavingbeenluckilyremoved）beamedsolemnlyonusEuropeans，likeagreatyellowharvestmoon。Thebunchesofpurplingdateswerependingfromthebranches；greycranesorheronswereflyingoverthecoolshininglakes，thattheriver’soverflowhadleftbehind；waterwasgurglingthroughthecoursesbytherudelocksandbarriersformedthere，andoverflowingthispatchofground；whilsttheneighbouringfieldwasfastbuddingintothemorebrilliantfreshgreen。Singledromedariesweresteppingalong，theirriderslollingontheirhunches；lowsail-boatswerelyinginthecanals；now，wecrossedanoldmarblebridge；now，wewent，onebyone，overaridgeofslipperyearth；now，weflounderedthroughasmalllakeofmud。Atlast，atabouthalf-a-mileoffthePyramid，wecametoapieceofwatersometwo-scoreyardsbroad，wherearegimentofhalf-nakedArabs，seizinguponeachindividualoftheparty，boreusoffontheirshoulders，tothelaughterofall，andthegreatperplexityofseveral，whoeverymomentexpectedtobepitchedintooneofthemanyholeswithwhichthetreacherouslakeabounded。
Itwasnothingbutjokingandlaughter，bullyingofguides，shoutingforinterpreters，quarrellingaboutsixpences。Wewereactingafarce，withthePyramidsforthescene。Theretheyroseupenormousunderoureyes，andthemostabsurdtrivialthingsweregoingonundertheirshadow。Thesublimehaddisappeared，vastastheywere。DoyourememberhowGulliverlosthisaweofthetremendousBrobdingnagladies？Everytravellermustgothroughallsortsofchaffering，andbargaining，andpaltryexperiences，atthisspot。Youlookupthetremendoussteps，withascoreofsavageruffiansbellowingroundyou；youhearfaintcheersandcrieshighup，andcatchsightoflittlereptilescrawlingupwards；
or，havingachievedthesummit，theycomehoppingandbouncingdownagainfromdegreetodegree，——thecheersandcriesswelllouderandmoredisagreeable；presentlythelittlejumpingthing，nobiggerthananinsectamomentago，bouncesdownuponyouexpandedintoapantingMajorofBengalcavalry。HedrivesofftheArabswithanoath，——wipeshisredshiningfacewithhisyellowhandkerchief，dropspuffingonthesandinashadycorner，wherecoldfowlandhardeggsareawaitinghim，andthenextminuteyouseehisnoseplungedinafoamingbeakerofbrandyandsoda-water。Hecansaynow，andforever，hehasbeenupthePyramid。Thereisnothingsublimeinit。Youcastyoureyeoncemoreupthatstaggeringperspectiveofazigzagline，whichendsatthesummit，andwishyouwereupthere——anddownagain。Forwards！——Upwithyou！Itmustbedone。SixArabsarebehindyou，whowon’tletyouescapeifyouwould。
Theimportunityoftheseruffiansisaludicrousannoyancetowhichatravellermustsubmit。FortwomilesbeforeyoureachthePyramidstheyseizeonyouandneverceasehowling。Fiveorsixofthempounceupononevictim，andneverleavehimuntiltheyhavecarriedhimupanddown。Sometimestheyconspiretorunamanupthehugestair，andbringhim，half-killedandfainting，tothetop。Alwaysacoupleofbrutesinsistuponimpellingyousternwards；fromwhomtheonlymeanstoreleaseyourselfistokickoutvigorouslyandunmercifully，whentheArabswillpossiblyretreat。Theascentisnottheleastromantic，ordifficult，orsublime：youwalkupagreatbrokenstaircase，ofwhichsomeofthestepsarefourfeethigh。It’snothard，onlyalittlehigh。
Youseenobetterviewfromthetopthanyoubeholdfromthebottom；onlyalittlemoreriver，andsand，andricefield。Youjumpdownthebigstepsatyourleisure；butyourmeditationsyoumustkeepforafter-times，——thecursedshriekingoftheArabspreventsallthoughtorleisure-
AndthisisallyouhavetotellaboutthePyramids？Oh！forshame！Notacomplimenttotheirageandsize？Notabigphrase，——
notarapture？Doyoumeantosaythatyouhadnofeelingofrespectandawe？Try，man，andbuildupamonumentofwordsasloftyastheyare——they，whom\"imberedax\"and\"aquiloimpotens\"
andtheflightofageshavenotbeenabletodestroy-
No：bethatworkforgreatgeniuses，greatpainters，greatpoets！Thisquillwasnevermadetotakesuchflights；itcomesofthewingofahumbledomesticbird，whowalksacommon；whotalksagreatdeal（andhissessometimes）；whocan’tflyfarorhigh，anddropsalwaysveryquickly；andwhoseunromanticendis，tobelaidonaMichaelmasorChristmastable，andtheretobediscussedforhalf-an-hour——letushope，withsomerelish。
***
AnotherweeksawusintheQuarantineHarbouratMalta，whereseventeendaysofprisonandquietwerealmostagreeable，aftertheincessantsight-seeingofthelasttwomonths。Intheinterval，betweenthe23rdofAugustandthe27thofOctober，wemayboastofhavingseenmoremenandcitiesthanmosttravellershaveseeninsuchatime：-Lisbon，Cadiz，Gibraltar，Malta，Athens，Smyrna，Constantinople，Jerusalem，Cairo。Ishallhavethecarpet-bag，whichhasvisitedtheseplacesincompanywithitsowner，embroideredwiththeirnames；asmilitaryflagsareemblazoned，andlaidupinordinary，tobelookedatinoldage。Withwhatanumberofsightsandpictures，——ofnovelsensations，andlastinganddelightfulremembrances，doesamanfurnishhismindaftersuchatour！Youforgetalltheannoyancesoftravel；butthepleasureremainswithyou，throughthatkindprovisionofnaturebywhichamanforgetsbeingill，butthinkswithjoyofgettingwell，andcanrememberalltheminutecircumstancesofhisconvalescence。I
forgetwhatsea-sicknessisnow：thoughitoccupiesawofulportionofmyJournal。Therewasatimeonboardwhenthebitteralewasdecidedlymuddy；andthecookoftheshipdesertingatConstantinople，itmustbeconfessedhissuccessorwasforsometimebeforehegothishandin。Thesesorrowshavepassedawaywiththesoothinginfluenceoftime：thepleasuresofthevoyageremain，letushope，aslongaslifewillendure。ItwasbutforacoupleofdaysthatthoseshiningcolumnsoftheParthenonglowedundertheblueskythere；buttheexperienceofalifecouldscarcelyimpressthemmorevividly。WesawCadizonlyforanhour；
butthewhitebuildings，andthegloriousbluesea，howcleartheyaretothememory！——withthetangofthatgipsy’sguitardancinginthemarket-place，inthemidstofthefruit，andthebeggars，andthesunshine。WhocanforgettheBosphorus，thebrightestandfairestsceneinalltheworld；orthetoweringlinesofGibraltar；
orthegreatpilesofMafra，aswerodeintotheTagus？AsIwritethis，andthink，backcomesRhodes，withitsoldtowersandartillery，andthatwonderfulatmosphere，andthatastonishingblueseawhichenvironstheisland。TheArabridersgopacingovertheplainsofSharon，intherosytwilight，justbeforesunrise；andI
canseetheghastlyMoabmountains，withtheDeadSeagleamingbeforethem，fromthemosqueonthewaytowardsBethany。TheblackgnarledtreesofGethsemanelieatthefootofOlivet，andtheyellowrampartsofthecityriseuponthestonyhillsbeyond。
Butthehappiestandbestofalltherecollections，perhaps，arethoseofthehourspassedatnightonthedeck，whenthestarswereshiningoverhead，andthehoursweretolledattheirtime，andyourthoughtswerefixeduponhomefaraway。AsthesunroseIonceheardthepriest，fromtheminaretofConstantinople，cryingout，\"Cometoprayer，\"withhisshrillvoiceringingthroughtheclearair；andsaw，atthesamehour，theArabprostratehimselfandpray，andtheJewRabbi，bendingoverhisbook，andworshippingtheMakerofTurkandJew。SittingathomeinLondon，andwritingthislastlineoffarewell，thosefigurescomebacktheclearestofalltothememory，withthepicture，too，ofourshipsailingoverthepeacefulSabbathsea，andourownprayersandservicescelebratedthere。Soeach，inhisfashion，andafterhiskind，isbowingdown，andadoringtheFather，whoisequallyaboveall。Cavilnot，youbrotherorsister，ifyourneighbour’svoiceisnotlikeyours；
onlyhopethathiswordsarehonest（asfarastheymaybe），andhishearthumbleandthankful。
Footnotes：
{1}SaintPaulspeakingfromtheAreopagus，andrebukingthesesuperstitionsaway，yetspeakstenderlytothepeoplebeforehim，whosedevotionshehadmarked；quotestheirpoets，tobringthemtothinkoftheGodunknown，whomtheyhadignorantlyworshipped；andsays，thatthetimesofthisignoranceGodwinkedat，butthatnowitwastimetorepent。NorebukecansurelybemoregentlethanthisdeliveredbytheuprightApostle。
{2}Thackeray’sdrawingisshownatthispointinthebook。
{3}AtDerrynaneBeg，forinstance。