第3章
加入书架 A- A+
点击下载App,搜索"THE SHADOW LINE",免费读到尾

  Theword\"Delay\"enteredthesecretchamberofmybrain,resoundedtherelikeatollingbellwhichmaddenstheear,affectedallmysenses,tookonablackcolouring,abittertaste,adeadlymeaning。

  \"Iamreallysorrytoseeyouworriedlikethis。

  Indeed,Iam……\"

  ItwastheonlyhumanespeechIusedtohearatthattime。Anditcamefromadoctor,ap-

  propriatelyenough。

  Adoctorishumanebydefinition。Butthatmanwassoinreality。Hisspeechwasnotprofessional。

  Iwasnotill。Butotherpeoplewere,andthatwasthereasonofhisvisitingtheship。

  HewasthedoctorofourLegationand,ofcourse,oftheConsulate,too。Helookedaftertheship’shealth,whichgenerallywaspoor,andtrembling,asitwere,onthevergeofabreak-up。Yes。Themenailed。Andthustimewasnotonlymoney,butlifeaswell。

  Ihadneverseensuchasteadyship’scompany。

  Asthedoctorremarkedtome:\"Youseemtohaveamostrespectablelotofseamen。\"Notonlyweretheyconsistentlysober,buttheydidnotevenwanttogoashore。Carewastakentoexposethemaslittleaspossibletothesun。Theywereemployedonlightworkundertheawnings。Andthehumanedoctorcommendedme。

  \"Yourarrangementsappeartometobeveryjudicious,mydearCaptain。\"

  Itisdifficulttoexpresshowmuchthatpro-

  nouncementcomfortedme。Thedoctor’sround,fullfaceframedinalight-colouredwhiskerwastheperfectionofadignifiedamenity。Hewastheonlyhumanbeingintheworldwhoseemedtotaketheslightestinterestinme。Hewouldgenerallysitinthecabinforhalfanhourorsoateveryvisit。

  Isaidtohimoneday:

  \"IsupposetheonlythingnowistotakecareofthemasyouaredoingtillIcangettheshiptosea?\"

  Heinclinedhishead,shuttinghiseyesunderthelargespectacles,andmurmured:

  \"Thesea……undoubtedly。\"

  Thefirstmemberofthecrewfairlyknockedoverwasthesteward——thefirstmantowhomIhadspokenonboard。Hewastakenashore(withcholericsymptoms)anddiedthereattheendofaweek。Then,whileIwasstillunderthestartlingimpressionofthisfirsthome-thrustoftheclimate,Mr。Burnsgaveupandwenttobedinaragingfeverwithoutsayingawordtoanybody。

  Ibelievehehadpartlyfrettedhimselfintothatillness;theclimatedidtherestwiththeswiftnessofaninvisiblemonsterambushedintheair,inthewater,inthemudoftheriver-bank。Mr。Burnswasapredestinedvictim。

  Idiscoveredhimlyingonhisback,glaringsul-

  lenlyandradiatingheatononelikeasmallfurnace。

  Hewouldhardlyanswermyquestions,andonlygrumbled。Couldn’tamantakeanafternoonoffdutywithabadheadache——foronce?

  Thatevening,asIsatinthesaloonafterdinner,Icouldhearhimmutteringcontinuouslyinhisroom。Ransome,whowasclearingthetable,saidtome:

  \"Iamafraid,sir,Iwon’tbeabletogivethematealltheattentionhe’slikelytoneed。Iwillhavetobeforwardinthegalleyagreatpartofmytime。\"

  Ransomewasthecook。Thematehadpointedhimouttomethefirstday,standingonthedeck,hisarmscrossedonhisbroadchest,gazingontheriver。

  Evenatadistancehiswell-proportionedfigure,somethingthoroughlysailor-likeinhispoise,madehimnoticeable。Onnearerviewtheintelligent,quieteyes,awell-bredface,thedisciplinedin-

  dependenceofhismannermadeupanattractivepersonality。When,inaddition,Mr。Burnstoldmethathewasthebestseamanintheship,Iex-

  pressedmysurprisethatinhisearliestprimeandofsuchappearanceheshouldsignonascookonboardaship。

  \"It’shisheart,\"Mr。Burnshadsaid。\"There’ssomethingwrongwithit。Hemustn’texerthim-

  selftoomuchorhemaydropdeadsuddenly。\"

  Andhewastheonlyonetheclimatehadnottouched——perhapsbecause,carryingadeadlyenemyinhisbreast,hehadschooledhimselfintoasystematiccontroloffeelingsandmovements。

  Whenonewasinthesecretthiswasapparentinhismanner。Afterthepoorstewarddied,andashecouldnotbereplacedbyawhitemaninthisOrientalport,Ransomehadvolunteeredtodothedoublework。

  \"Icandoitallright,sir,aslongasIgoaboutitquietly,\"hehadassuredme。

  Butobviouslyhecouldn’tbeexpectedtotakeupsick-nursinginaddition。Moreover,thedoctorperemptorilyorderedMr。Burnsashore。

  Withaseamanoneachsideholdinghimupunderthearms,thematewentoverthegangwaymoresullenthanever。Webuilthimupwithpil-

  lowsinthegharry,andhemadeanefforttosaybrokenly:

  \"Now——you’vegot——whatyouwanted——gotmeoutof——theship。\"

  \"Youwerenevermoremistakeninyourlife,Mr。Burns,\"Isaidquietly,dulysmilingathim;

  andthetrapdroveofftoasortofsanatorium,apavilionofbrickswhichthedoctorhadinthegroundsofhisresidence。

  IvisitedMr。Burnsregularly。Afterthefirstfewdays,whenhedidn’tknowanybody,here-

  ceivedmeasifIhadcomeeithertogloatoveranenemyorelsetocurryfavourwithadeeplywrongedperson。Itwaseitheroneortheother,justasithappenedaccordingtohisfantasticsick-

  roommoods。Whicheveritwas,hemanagedtoconveyittomeevenduringtheperiodwhenheap-

  pearedalmosttooweaktotalk。Itreatedhimtomyinvariablekindliness。

  Thenoneday,suddenly,asurgeofdownrightpanicburstthroughallthiscraziness。

  IfIlefthimbehindinthisdeadlyplacehewoulddie。Hefeltit,hewascertainofit。ButI

  wouldn’thavethehearttoleavehimashore。HehadawifeandchildinSydney。

  Heproducedhiswastedforearmsfromunderthesheetwhichcoveredhimandclaspedhisfleshlessclaws。Hewoulddie!Hewoulddiehere……

  Heabsolutelymanagedtositup,butonlyforamoment,andwhenhefellbackIreallythoughtthathewoulddiethereandthen。IcalledtotheBengalidispenser,andhastenedawayfromtheroom。

  Nextdayheupsetmethoroughlybyrenewinghisentreaties。Ireturnedanevasiveanswer,andlefthimthepictureofghastlydespair。ThedayafterIwentinwithreluctance,andheattackedmeatonceinamuchstrongervoiceandwithanabundanceofargumentwhichwasquitestartling。

  Hepresentedhiscasewithasortofcrazyvigour,andaskedmefinallyhowwouldIliketohaveaman’sdeathonmyconscience?HewantedmetopromisethatIwouldnotsailwithouthim。

  IsaidthatIreallymustconsultthedoctorfirst。

  Hecriedoutatthat。Thedoctor!Never!Thatwouldbeadeathsentence。

  Theefforthadexhaustedhim。Heclosedhiseyes,butwentonramblinginalowvoice。Ihadhatedhimfromthestart。Thelatecaptainhadhatedhim,too。Hadwishedhimdead。Hadwishedallhandsdead……

  \"Whatdoyouwanttostandinwiththatwickedcorpsefor,sir?He’llhaveyou,too,\"heended,blinkinghisglazedeyesvacantly。

  \"Mr。Burns,\"Icried,verymuchdiscomposed,\"whatonearthareyoutalkingabout?\"

  Heseemedtocometohimself,thoughhewastooweaktostart。

  \"Idon’tknow,\"hesaidlanguidly。\"Butdon’taskthatdoctor,sir。YouareIaresailors。Don’taskhim,sir。Somedayperhapsyouwillhaveawifeandchildyourself。\"

  AndagainhepleadedforthepromisethatI

  wouldnotleavehimbehind。Ihadthefirmnessofmindnottogiveittohim。Afterwardthisstern-

  nessseemedcriminal;formymindwasmadeup。

  Thatprostratedman,withhardlystrengthenoughtobreatheandravagedbyapassionoffear,wasirresistible。And,besides,hehadhappenedtohitontherightwords。HeandIweresailors。Thatwasaclaim,forIhadnootherfamily。Astothewifeandchild(someday)argument,ithadnoforce。

  Itsoundedmerelybizarre。

  Icouldimaginenoclaimthatwouldbestrongerandmoreabsorbingthantheclaimofthatship,ofthesemensnaredintheriverbysillycommercialcomplications,asifinsomepoisonoustrap。

  However,Ihadnearlyfoughtmywayout。Outtosea。Thesea——whichwaspure,safe,andfriendly。Threedaysmore。

  Thatthoughtsustainedandcarriedmeonmywaybacktotheship。Inthesaloonthedoctor’svoicegreetedme,andhislargeformfollowedhisvoice,issuingoutofthestarboardsparecabinwheretheship’smedicinechestwaskeptsecurelylashedinthebed-place。

  FindingthatIwasnotonboardhehadgoneinthere,hesaid,toinspectthesupplyofdrugs,bandages,andsoon。Everythingwascompletedandinorder。

  Ithankedhim;Ihadjustbeenthinkingofaskinghimtodothatverything,asinacoupleofdays,asheknew,weweregoingtosea,whereallourtroublesofeverysortwouldbeoveratlast。

  Helistenedgravelyandmadenoanswer。ButwhenIopenedtohimmymindastoMr。Burnshesatdownbymyside,and,layinghishandonmykneeamicably,beggedmetothinkwhatitwasI

  wasexposingmyselfto。

  Themanwasjuststrongenoughtobearbeingmovedandnomore。Buthecouldn’tstandare-

  turnofthefever。Ihadbeforemeapassageofsixtydaysperhaps,beginningwithintricatenavi-

  gationandendingprobablywithalotofbadweather。CouldIruntheriskofhavingtogothroughitsingle-handed,withnochiefofficerandwithasecondquiteayouth?……

  Hemighthaveaddedthatitwasmyfirstcom-

  mand,too。Hedidprobablythinkofthatfact,forhecheckedhimself。Itwasverypresenttomymind。

  HeadvisedmeearnestlytocabletoSingaporeforachiefofficer,evenifIhadtodelaymysailingforaweek。

  \"Never,\"Isaid。Theverythoughtgavemetheshivers。Thehandsseemedfairlyfit,allofthem,andthiswasthetimetogetthemaway。OnceatseaIwasnotafraidoffacinganything。Theseawasnowtheonlyremedyforallmytroubles。

  Thedoctor’sglassesweredirectedatmeliketwolampssearchingthegenuinenessofmyresolution。

  Heopenedhislipsasiftoarguefurther,butshutthemagainwithoutsayinganything。IhadavisionsovividofpoorBurnsinhisexhaustion,helplessness,andanguish,thatitmovedmemorethantherealityIhadcomeawayfromonlyanhourbefore。Itwaspurgedfromthedrawbacksofhispersonality,andIcouldnotresistit。

  \"Lookhere,\"Isaid。\"UnlessyoutellmeofficiallythatthemanmustnotbemovedI’llmakearrangementstohavehimbroughtonboardto-

  morrow,andshalltaketheshipoutoftherivernextmorning,evenifIhavetoanchoroutsidethebarforacoupleofdaystogetherreadyforsea。\"

  \"Oh!I’llmakeallthearrangementsmyself,\"

  saidthedoctoratonce。\"IspokeasIdidonlyasafriend——asawell-wisher,andthatsortofthing。\"

  Heroseinhisdignifiedsimplicityandgavemeawarmhandshake,rathersolemnly,Ithought。Buthewasasgoodashisword。WhenMr。Burnsap-

  pearedatthegangwaycarriedonastretcher,thedoctorhimselfwalkedbyitsside。Theprogrammehadbeenalteredinsofarthatthistransportationhadbeenlefttothelastmoment,ontheverymorn-

  ingofourdeparture。

  Itwasbarelyanhouraftersunrise。Thedoctorwavedhisbigarmtomefromtheshoreandwalkedbackatoncetohistrap,whichhadfollowedhimemptytotheriver-side。Mr。Burns,carriedacrossthequarter-deck,hadtheappearanceofbeingabsolutelylifeless。Ransomewentdowntosettlehiminhiscabin。Ihadtoremainondecktolookaftertheship,forthetughadgotholdofourtow-

  ropealready。

  Thesplashofourshore-fastsfallinginthewaterproducedacompletechangeoffeelinginme。Itwasliketheimperfectreliefofawakeningfromanightmare。Butwhentheship’sheadswungdowntheriverawayfromthattown,Orientalandsqualid,Imissedtheexpectedelationofthatstriven-formoment。Whattherewas,un-

  doubtedly,wasarelaxationoftensionwhichtrans-

  lateditselfintoasenseofwearinessafteranin-

  gloriousfight。

  Aboutmiddayweanchoredamileoutsidethebar。Theafternoonwasbusyforallhands。

  Watchingtheworkfromthepoop,whereIre-

  mainedallthetime,Idetectedinitsomeofthelanguorofthesixweeksspentinthesteamingheatoftheriver。Thefirstbreezewouldblowthataway。Nowthecalmwascomplete。Ijudgedthatthesecondofficer——acallowyouthwithanunpromisingface——wasnot,toputitmildly,ofthatinvaluablestufffromwhichacommander’srighthandismade。ButIwasgladtocatchalongthemaindeckafewsmilesonthoseseamen’sfacesatwhichIhadhardlyhadtimetohaveagoodlookasyet。Havingthrownoffthemortalcoilofshoreaffairs,Ifeltmyselffamiliarwiththemandyetalittlestrange,likealong-lostwandereramonghiskin。

  Ransomeflittedcontinuallytoandfrobetweenthegalleyandthecabin。Itwasapleasuretolookathim。Themanpositivelyhadgrace。Healoneofallthecrewhadnothadaday’sillnessinport。ButwiththeknowledgeofthatuneasyheartwithinhisbreastIcoulddetecttherestraintheputonthenaturalsailor-likeagilityofhismovements。Itwasasthoughhehadsomethingveryfragileorveryexplosivetocarryabouthispersonandwasallthetimeawareofit。

  Ihadoccasiontoaddresshimonceortwice。Heansweredmeinhispleasant,quietvoiceandwithafaint,slightlywistfulsmile。Mr。Burnsappearedtoberesting。Heseemedfairlycomfortable。

  AftersunsetIcameoutondeckagaintomeetonlyastillvoid。Thethin,featurelesscrustofthecoastcouldnotbedistinguished。Thedarknesshadrisenaroundtheshiplikeamysteriousemana-

  tionfromthedumbandlonelywaters。Ileanedontherailandturnedmyeartotheshadowsofthenight。Notasound。Mycommandmighthavebeenaplanetflyingvertiginouslyonitsappointedpathinaspaceofinfinitesilence。Iclungtotherailasifmysenseofbalancewereleavingmeforgood。Howabsurd。Ifailednervously。

  \"Ondeckthere!\"

  Theimmediateanswer,\"Yes,sir,\"brokethespell。Theanchor-watchmanranupthepoopladdersmartly。Itoldhimtoreportatoncetheslightestsignofabreezecoming。

  GoingbelowIlookedinonMr。Burns。Infact,Icouldnotavoidseeinghim,forhisdoorstoodopen。Themanwassowastedthat,inthiswhitecabin,underawhitesheet,andwithhisdiminishedheadsunkinthewhitepillow,hisredmoustachescapturedtheireyesexclusively,likesomethingarti-

  ficial——apairofmoustachesfromashopexhibitedthereintheharshlightofthebulkhead-lampwithoutashade。

  WhileIstaredwithasortofwonderheassertedhimselfbyopeninghiseyesandevenmovingtheminmydirection。Aminutestir。

  \"Deadcalm,Mr。Burns,\"Isaidresignedly。

  InanunexpectedlydistinctvoiceMr。Burnsbe-

  ganaramblingspeech。Itstonewasverystrange,notasifaffectedbyhisillness,butasifofadiffer-

  entnature。Itsoundedunearthly。Astothematter,Iseemedtomakeoutthatitwasthefaultofthe\"oldman\"——thelatecaptain——ambusheddownthereundertheseawithsomeevilintention。

  Itwasaweirdstory。

  Ilistenedtotheend;thensteppingintothecabinIlaidmyhandonthemate’sforehead。Itwascool。Hewaslight-headedonlyfromextremeweakness。Suddenlyheseemedtobecomeawareofme,andinhisownvoice——ofcourse,veryfeeble——heaskedregretfully:

  \"Istherenochanceatalltogetunderway,sir?\"

  \"What’sthegoodoflettinggoourholdofthegroundonlytodrift,Mr。Burns?\"Ianswered。

  HesighedandIlefthimtohisimmobility。Hisholdonlifewasasslenderashisholdonsanity。I

  wasoppressedbymylonelyresponsibilities。I

  wentintomycabintoseekreliefinafewhours’

  sleep,butalmostbeforeIclosedmyeyesthemanondeckcamedownreportingalightbreeze。

  Enoughtogetunderwaywith,hesaid。

  Anditwasnomorethanjustenough。Iorderedthewindlassmanned,thesailsloosed,andthetop-

  sailsset。ButbythetimeIhadcasttheshipI

  couldhardlyfeelanybreathofwind。Neverthe-

  less,Itrimmedtheyardsandputeverythingonher。Iwasnotgoingtogiveuptheattempt。

  part2-1ChapterIV

  WITHheranchoratthebowandclothedincanvastoherverytrucks,mycommandseemedtostandasmotionlessasamodelshipsetonthegleamsandshadowsofpolishedmarble。Itwasimpossibletodistinguishlandfromwaterintheenigmaticaltranquillityoftheimmenseforcesoftheworld。

  Asuddenimpatiencepossessedme。

  \"Won’tsheanswerthehelmatall?\"Isaidirritablytothemanwhosestrongbrownhandsgraspingthespokesofthewheelstoodoutlightedonthedarkness;likeasymbolofmankind’sclaimtothedirectionofitsownfate。

  Heansweredme。

  \"Yes,sir。She’scoming-toslowly。\"

  \"Letherheadcomeuptosouth。\"

  \"Aye,aye,sir。\"

  Ipacedthepoop。Therewasnotasoundbutthatofmyfootsteps,tillthemanspokeagain。

  \"Sheisatsouthnow,sir。\"

  IfeltaslighttightnessofthechestbeforeIgaveoutthefirstcourseofmyfirstcommandtothesilentnight,heavywithdewandsparklingwithstars。Therewasafinalityintheactcommit-

  tingmetotheendlessvigilanceofmylonelytask。

  \"Steadyherheadatthat,\"Isaidatlast。\"Thecourseissouth。\"

  \"South,sir,\"echoedtheman。

  Isentbelowthesecondmateandhiswatchandremainedincharge,walkingthedeckthroughthechill,somnolenthoursthatprecedethedawn。

  Slightpuffscameandwent,andwhenevertheywerestrongenoughtowakeuptheblackwaterthemurmuralongsideranthroughmyveryheartinadelicatecrescendoofdelightanddiedawayswiftly。

  Iwasbitterlytired。Theverystarsseemedwearyofwaitingfordaybreak。Itcameatlastwithamother-of-pearlsheenatthezenith,suchasIhadneverseenbeforeinthetropics,unglowing,almostgray,withastrangereminderofhighlatitudes。

  Thevoiceofthelook-outmanhailedfromfor-

  ward:

  \"Landontheportbow,sir。\"

  \"Allright。\"

  LeaningontherailIneverevenraisedmyeyes。

  Themotionoftheshipwasimperceptible。Pres-

  entlyRansomebroughtmethecupofmorningcoffee。AfterIhaddrunkitIlookedahead,andinthestillstreakofverybrightpaleorangelightI

  sawthelandprofiledflatlyasifcutoutofblackpaperandseemingtofloatonthewateraslightascork。Buttherisingsunturneditintomeredarkvapour,adoubtful,massiveshadowtremblinginthehotglare。

  Thewatchfinishedwashingdecks。Iwentbe-

  lowandstoppedatMr。Burns’door(hecouldnotbeartohaveitshut),buthesitatedtospeaktohimtillhemovedhiseyes。Igavehimthenews。

  \"SightedCapeLiantatdaylight。Aboutfifteenmiles。\"

  Hemovedhislipsthen,butIheardnosoundtillIputmyeardown,andcaughtthepeevishcomment:\"Thisiscrawling……Noluck。\"

  \"Betterluckthanstandingstill,anyhow,\"I

  pointedoutresignedly,andlefthimtowhateverthoughtsorfancieshauntedhisawfulimmobility。

  Laterthatmorning,whenrelievedbymysecondofficer,IthrewmyselfonmycouchandforsomethreehoursorsoIreallyfoundoblivion。ItwassoperfectthatonwakingupIwonderedwhereIwas。

  Thencametheimmensereliefofthethought:onboardmyship!Atsea!Atsea!

  Throughtheport-holesIbeheldanunruffled,sun-smittenhorizon。Thehorizonofawindlessday。Butitsspaciousnessalonewasenoughtogivemeasenseofafortunateescape,amomentaryexultationoffreedom。

  Isteppedoutintothesaloonwithmyheartlighterthanithadbeenfordays。Ransomewasatthesideboardpreparingtolaythetableforthefirstseadinnerofthepassage。Heturnedhishead,andsomethinginhiseyescheckedmymodestelation。

  InstinctivelyIasked:\"Whatisitnow?\"notex-

  pectingintheleasttheanswerIgot。Itwasgivenwiththatsortofcontainedserenitywhichwascharacteristicoftheman。

  \"Iamafraidwehaven’tleftallsicknessbehindus,sir。\"

  \"Wehaven’t!What’sthematter?\"

  Hetoldmethenthattwoofourmenhadbeentakenbadwithfeverinthenight。Oneofthemwasburningandtheotherwasshivering,buthethoughtthatitwasprettymuchthesamething。

  Ithoughtso,too。Ifeltshockedbythenews。

  \"Oneburning,theothershivering,yousay?No。

  Wehaven’tleftthesicknessbehind。Dotheylookveryill?\"

  \"Middlingbad,sir。\"Ransome’seyesgazedsteadilyintomine。Weexchangedsmiles。Ran-

  some’salittlewistful,asusual,minenodoubtgrimenough,tocorrespondwithmysecretexasperation。

  Iasked:

  \"Wasthereanywindatallthismorning?\"

  \"Canhardlysaythat,sir。We’vemovedallthetimethough。Thelandaheadseemsalittlenearer。\"

  Thatwasit。Alittlenearer。Whereasifwehadonlyhadalittlemorewind,onlyaverylittlemore,wemight,weshould,havebeenabreastofLiantbythistimeandincreasingourdistancefromthatcontaminatedshore。Anditwasnotonlythedistance。Itseemedtomethatastrongerbreezewouldhaveblownawaythecontaminationwhichclungtotheship。Itobviouslydidclingtotheship。Twomen。Oneburning,oneshivering。I

  feltadistinctreluctancetogoandlookatthem。

  Whatwasthegood?Poisonispoison。Tropicalfeveristropicalfever。Butthatitshouldhavestretcheditsclawafterusovertheseaseemedtomeanextraordinaryandunfairlicense。Icouldhardlybelievethatitcouldbeanythingworsethanthelastdesperatepluckoftheevilfromwhichwewereescapingintothecleanbreathofthesea。Ifonlythatbreathhadbeenalittlestronger。How-

  ever,therewasthequinineagainstthefever。I

  wentintothesparecabinwherethemedicinechestwaskepttopreparetwodoses。Iopeneditfulloffaithasamanopensamiraculousshrine。Theupperpartwasinhabitedbyacollectionofbottles,allsquare-shoulderedandaslikeeachotheraspeas。Underthatorderlyarraythereweretwodrawers,stuffedasfullofthingsasonecouldim-

  agine——paperpackages,bandages,cardboardboxesofficiallylabelled。Thelowerofthetwo,inoneofitscompartments,containedourprovisionofquinine。

  Therewerefivebottles,allroundandallofasize。Onewasaboutathirdfull。Theotherfourremainedstillwrappedupinpaperandsealed。

  ButIdidnotexpecttoseeanenvelopelyingontopofthem。Asquareenvelope,belonging,infact,totheship’sstationery。

  ItlaysothatIcouldseeitwasnotcloseddown,andonpickingitupandturningitoverIperceivedthatitwasaddressedtomyself。Itcontainedahalf-sheetofnotepaper,whichIunfoldedwithaqueersenseofdealingwiththeuncanny,butwith-

  outanyexcitementaspeoplemeetanddoex-

  traordinarythingsinadream。

  \"MydearCaptain,\"itbegan,butIrantothesignature。Thewriterwasthedoctor。Thedatewasthatofthedayonwhich,returningfrommyvisittoMr。Burnsinthehospital,Ihadfoundtheexcellentdoctorwaitingformeinthecabin;andwhenhetoldmethathehadbeenputtingintimeinspectingthemedicinechestforme。Howbizarre!Whileexpectingmetocomeinatanymomenthehadbeenamusinghimselfbywritingmealetter,andthenasIcameinhadhastenedtostuffitintothemedicine-chestdrawer。Aratherincredibleproceeding。Iturnedtothetextinwonder。

  Inalarge,hurried,butlegiblehandthegood,sympatheticmanforsomereason,eitherofkind-

  nessormorelikelyimpelledbytheirresistiblede-

  siretoexpresshisopinion,withwhichhedidn’twanttodampmyhopesbefore,waswarningmenottoputmytrustinthebeneficialeffectsofachangefromlandtosea。\"Ididn’twanttoaddtoyourworriesbydiscouragingyourhopes,\"hewrote。\"Iamafraidthat,medicallyspeaking,theendofyourtroublesisnotyet。\"Inshort,heex-

  pectedmetohavetofightaprobablereturnoftropicalillness。FortunatelyIhadagoodpro-

  visionofquinine。Ishouldputmytrustinthat,andadministeritsteadily,whentheship’shealthwouldcertainlyimprove。

  Icrumpleduptheletterandrammeditintomypocket。Ransomecarriedofftwobigdosestothemenforward。Astomyself,Ididnotgoondeckasyet。IwentinsteadtothedoorofMr。Burns’

  room,andgavehimthatnews,too。

  Itwasimpossibletosaytheeffectithadonhim。

  AtfirstIthoughtthathewasspeechless。Hisheadlaysunkinthepillow。Hemovedhislipsenough,however,toassuremethathewasgettingmuchstronger;astatementshockinglyuntrueonthefaceofit。

  ThatafternoonItookmywatchasamatterofcourse。Agreatover-heatedstillnessenvelopedtheshipandseemedtoholdhermotionlessinaflamingambiencecomposedintwoshadesofblue。

  Faint,hotpuffseddiednervelesslyfromhersails。

  Andyetshemoved。Shemusthave。For,asthesunwassetting,wehaddrawnabreastofCapeLiantanddroppeditbehindus:anominousre-

  treatingshadowinthelastgleamsoftwilight。

  Intheevening,underthecrudeglareofhislamp,Mr。Burnsseemedtohavecomemoretothesurfaceofhisbedding。Itwasasifadepressinghandhadbeenliftedoffhim。Heansweredmyfewwordsbyacomparativelylong,connectedspeech。Heassertedhimselfstrongly。Ifheescapedbeingsmotheredbythisstagnantheat,hesaid,hewasconfidentthatinaveryfewdayshewouldbeabletocomeupondeckandhelpme。

  WhilehewasspeakingItrembledlestthiseffortofenergyshouldleavehimlifelessbeforemyeyes。

  ButIcannotdenythattherewassomethingcom-

  fortinginhiswillingness。Imadeasuitablereply,butpointedouttohimthattheonlythingthatcouldreallyhelpuswaswind——afairwind。

  Herolledhisheadimpatientlyonthepillow。

  Anditwasnotcomfortingintheleasttohearhimbegintomuttercrazilyaboutthelatecaptain,thatoldmanburiedinlatitude8d20’,rightinourway——ambushedattheentranceoftheGulf。

  \"Areyoustillthinkingofyourlatecaptain,Mr。

  Burns?\"Isaid。\"Iimaginethedeadfeelnoanimos-

  ityagainsttheliving。Theycarenothingforthem。\"

  \"Youdon’tknowthatone,\"hebreathedoutfeebly。

  \"No。Ididn’tknowhim,andhedidn’tknowme。Andsohecan’thaveanygrievanceagainstme,anyway。\"

  \"Yes。Butthere’salltherestofusonboard,\"heinsisted。

  Ifelttheinexpugnablestrengthofcommonsensebeinginsidiouslymenacedbythisgruesome,bythisinsane,delusion。AndIsaid:

  \"Youmustn’ttalksomuch。Youwilltireyourself。\"

  \"Andthereistheshipherself,\"hepersistedinawhisper。

  \"Now,notawordmore,\"Isaid,steppinginandlayingmyhandonhiscoolforehead。Itprovedtomethatthisatrociousabsurditywasrootedinthemanhimselfandnotinthedisease,which,ap-

  parently,hademptiedhimofeverypower,mentalandphysical,exceptthatonefixedidea。

  IavoidedgivingMr。Burnsanyopeningforcon-

  versationforthenextfewdays。Imerelyusedtothrowhimahasty,cheerywordwhenpassinghisdoor。Ibelievethatifhehadhadthestrengthhewouldhavecalledoutaftermemorethanonce。

  Buthehadn’tthestrength。Ransome,however,observedtomeoneafternoonthatthemate\"seemedtobepickingupwonderfully。\"

  \"Didhetalkanynonsensetoyouoflate?\"I

  askedcasually。

  \"No,sir。\"Ransomewasstartledbythedirectquestion;but,afterapause,headdedequably:

  \"Hetoldmethismorning,sir,thathewassorryhehadtoburyourlatecaptainrightintheship’sway,asonemaysay,outoftheGulf。\"

  \"Isn’tthisnonsenseenoughforyou?\"Iasked,lookingconfidentlyattheintelligent,quietfaceonwhichthesecretuneasinessintheman’sbreasthadthrownatransparentveilofcare。

  Ransomedidn’tknow。Hehadnotgivenathoughttothematter。Andwithafaintsmileheflittedawayfrommeonhisnever-endingduties,withhisusualguardedactivity。

  Twomoredayspassed。Wehadadvancedalittleway——averylittleway——intothelargerspaceoftheGulfofSiam。Seizingeagerlyupontheelationofthefirstcommandthrownintomylap,bytheagencyofCaptainGiles,Ihadyetanuneasyfeelingthatsuchluckasthishasgotperhapstobepaidforinsomeway。Ihadheld,professionally,areviewofmychances。Iwascompetentenoughforthat。Atleast,Ithoughtso。Ihadageneralsenseofmypreparednesswhichonlyamanpur-

  suingacallinghelovescanknow。Thatfeelingseemedtomethemostnaturalthingintheworld。

  Asnaturalasbreathing。IimaginedIcouldnothavelivedwithoutit。

  Idon’tknowwhatIexpected。Perhapsnothingelsethanthatspecialintensityofexistencewhichisthequintessenceofyouthfulaspirations。What-

  everIexpectedIdidnotexpecttobebesetbyhurricanes。Iknewbetterthanthat。IntheGulfofSiamtherearenohurricanes。ButneitherdidI

  expecttofindmyselfboundhandandfoottothehopelessextentwhichwasrevealedtomeasthedayswenton。

  Notthattheevilspellheldusalwaysmotionless。

  Mysteriouscurrentsdriftedushereandthere,withastealthypowermademanifestonlybythechang-

  ingvistasoftheislandsfringingtheeastshoreoftheGulf。Andtherewerewinds,too,fitfulanddeceitful。Theyraisedhopesonlytodashthemintothebitterestdisappointment,promisesofadvanceendinginlostground,expiringinsighs,dyingintodumbstillnessinwhichthecurrentshaditalltheirownway——theirowninimicalway。

  TheislandofKoh-ring,agreat,black,up-

  heavedridgeamongstalotoftinyislets,lyingupontheglassywaterlikeatritonamongstmin-

  nows,seemedtobethecentreofthefatalcircle。Itseemedimpossibletogetawayfromit。Dayafterdayitremainedinsight。Morethanonce,inafavourablebreeze,Iwouldtakeitsbearingsinthefast-ebbingtwilight,thinkingthatitwasforthelasttime。Vainhope。Anightoffitfulairswouldundothegainsoftemporaryfavour,andtherisingsunwouldthrowouttheblackreliefofKoh-ringooking。

  part2-5

  ChapterV

  IHEARDtheclatterofthescissorsescapingfromhishand,notedtheperilousheaveofhiswholepersonovertheedgeofthebunkafterthem,andthen,returningtomyfirstpurpose,pursuedmycourseonthedeck。Thesparkleoftheseafilledmyeyes。Itwasgorgeousandbarren,monotonousandwithouthopeundertheemptycurveofthesky。Thesailshungmotionlessandslack,theveryfoldsoftheirsaggingsurfacesmovednomorethancarvedgranite。Theimpetuosityofmyad-

  ventmadethemanatthehelmstartslightly。A

  blockaloftsqueakedincomprehensibly,forwhatonearthcouldhavemadeitdoso?Itwasawhistlingnotelikeabird’s。Foralong,longtimeIfacedanemptyworld,steepedinaninfinityofsilence,throughwhichthesunshinepouredandflowedforsomemysteriouspurpose。ThenIheardRansome’svoiceatmyelbow。

  \"IhaveputMr。Burnsbacktobed,sir。\"

  \"Youhave。\"

  \"Well,sir,hegotout,allofasudden,butwhenheletgotheedgeofhisbunkhefelldown。Heisn’tlight-headed,though,itseemstome。\"

  \"No,\"Isaiddully,withoutlookingatRansome。

  Hewaitedforamoment,thencautiously,asifnottogiveoffence:\"Idon’tthinkweneedlosemuchofthatstuff,sir,\"hesaid,\"Icansweepitup,everybitofitalmost,andthenwecouldsifttheglassout。

  Iwillgoaboutitatonce。Itwillnotmakethebreakfastlate,nottenminutes。\"

  \"Oh,yes,\"Isaidbitterly。\"Letthebreakfastwait,sweepupeverybitofit,andthenthrowthedamnedlotoverboard!\"

  Theprofoundsilencereturned,andwhenI

  lookedovermyshoulder,Ransome——theintelli-

  gent,sereneRansome——hadvanishedfrommyside。Theintenselonelinessoftheseaactedlikepoisononmybrain。WhenIturnedmyeyestotheship,Ihadamorbidvisionofherasafloatinggrave。Whohasn’theardofshipsfoundfloating,haphazard,withtheircrewsalldead?Ilookedattheseamanatthehelm,Ihadanimpulsetospeaktohim,and,indeed,hisfacetookonanexpectantcastasifhehadguessedmyintention。ButintheendIwentbelow,thinkingIwouldbealonewiththegreatnessofmytroubleforalittlewhile。ButthroughhisopendoorMr。Burnssawmecomedown,andaddressedmegrumpily:\"Well,sir?\"

  Iwentin。\"Itisn’twellatall,\"Isaid。

  Mr。Burns,reestablishedinhisbed-place,wasconcealinghishirsutecheekinthepalmofhishand。

  \"Thatconfoundedfellowhastakenawaythescissorsfromme,\"werethenextwordshesaid。

  ThetensionIwassufferingfromwassogreatthatitwasperhapsjustaswellthatMr。Burnshadstartedonhisgrievance。Heseemedverysoreaboutitandgrumbled,\"DoeshethinkIammad,orwhat?\"

  \"Idon’tthinkso,Mr。Burns,\"Isaid。Ilookeduponhimatthatmomentasamodelofself-

  possession。Ievenconceivedonthataccountasortofadmirationforthatman,whohad(apartfromtheintensematerialityofwhatwasleftofhisbeard)comeasneartobeingadisembodiedspiritasanymancandoandlive。Inoticedthepre-

  ternaturalsharpnessoftheridgeofhisnose,thedeepcavitiesofhistemples,andIenviedhim。Hewassoreducedthathewouldprobablydieverysoon。Enviableman!Sonearextinction——whileIhadtobearwithinmeatumultofsufferingvitality,doubt,confusion,self-reproach,andanin-

  definitereluctancetomeetthehorridlogicofthesituation。Icouldnothelpmuttering:\"IfeelasifIweregoingmadmyself。\"

  Mr。Burnsglaredspectrally,butotherwisewonderfullycomposed。

  \"Ialwaysthoughthewouldplayussomedeadlytrick,\"

  hesaid,withapeculiaremphasisontheHE。

  Itgavemeamentalshock,butIhadneitherthemind,northeheart,northespirittoarguewithhim。Myformofsicknesswasindifference。Thecreepingparalysisofahopelessoutlook。SoI

  onlygazedathim。Mr。Burnsbrokeintofurtherspeech。

  \"Eh!What!No!Youwon’tbelieveit?Well,howdoyouaccountforthis?Howdoyouthinkitcouldhavehappened?\"

  \"Happened?\"Irepeateddully。\"Why,yes,howinthenameoftheinfernalpowersdidthisthinghappen?\"

  Indeed,onthinkingitout,itseemedincompre-

  hensiblethatitshouldjustbelikethis:thebottlesemptied,refilled,rewrapped,andreplaced。Asortofplot,asinisterattempttodeceive,athingre-

  semblingslyvengeance,butforwhat?Orelseafiendishjoke。ButMr。Burnswasinpossessionofatheory。Itwassimple,andheuttereditsolemnlyinahollowvoice。

  \"IsupposetheyhavegivenhimaboutfifteenpoundsinHaiphongforthatlittlelot。\"

  \"Mr。Burns!\"Icried。

  Henoddedgrotesquelyoverhisraisedlegs,liketwobroomsticksinthepyjamas,withenormousbarefeetattheend。

  \"Whynot?Thestuffisprettyexpensiveinthispartoftheworld,andtheywereveryshortofitinTonkin。Andwhatdidhecare?Youhavenotknownhim。Ihave,andIhavedefiedhim。HefearedneitherGod,nordevil,norman,norwind,norsea,norhisownconscience。AndIbelievehehatedeverybodyandeverything。ButIthinkhewasafraidtodie。IbelieveIamtheonlymanwhoeverstooduptohim。Ifacedhiminthatcabinwhereyoulivenow,whenhewassick,andI

  cowedhimthen。HethoughtIwasgoingtotwisthisneckforhim。IfhehadhadhiswaywewouldhavebeenbeatingupagainsttheNord-Eastmon-

  soon,aslongashelivedandafterward,too,foragesandages。ActingtheFlyingDutchmanintheChinaSea!Ha!Ha!\"

  \"Butwhyshouldhereplacethebottleslikethis?\"……Ibegan。

  \"Whyshouldn’the?Whyshouldhewanttothrowthebottlesaway?Theyfitthedrawer。

  Theybelongtothemedicinechest。\"

  \"Andtheywerewrappedup,\"Icried。

  \"Well,thewrapperswerethere。Diditfromhabit,Isuppose,andastorefilling,thereisalwaysalotofstufftheysendinpaperparcelsthatburstafteratime。Andthen,whocantell?Isupposeyoudidn’ttasteit,sir?But,ofcourse,youaresure……\"

  \"No,\"Isaid。\"Ididn’ttasteit。Itisallover-

  boardnow。\"

  Behindme,asoft,cultivatedvoicesaid:\"Ihavetastedit。Itseemedamixtureofallsorts,sweet-

  ish,saltish,veryhorrible。\"

  Ransome,steppingoutofthepantry,hadbeenlisteningforsometime,asitwasveryexcusableinhimtodo。

  \"Adirtytrick,\"saidMr。Burns。\"Ialwayssaidhewould。\"

  Themagnitudeofmyindignationwasun-

  bounded。Andthekind,sympatheticdoctor,too。

  TheonlysympatheticmanIeverknew……

  insteadofwritingthatwarningletter,theveryre-

  finementofsympathy,whydidn’tthemanmakeaproperinspection?But,asamatteroffact,itwashardlyfairtoblamethedoctor。Thefittingswereinorderandthemedicinechestisanofficiallyar-

  rangedaffair。Therewasnothingreallytoarousetheslightestsuspicion。ThepersonIcouldneverforgivewasmyself。Nothingshouldeverbetakenforgranted。Theseedofeverlastingremorsewassowninmybreast。

  \"Ifeelit’sallmyfault,\"Iexclaimed,\"mineandnobodyelse’s。That’showIfeel。Ishallneverforgivemyself。\"

  \"That’sveryfoolish,sir,\"saidMr。Burnsfiercely。

  Andafterthisefforthefellbackexhaustedonhisbed。Heclosedhiseyes,hepanted;thisaffair,thisabominablesurprisehadshakenhimup,too。

  AsIturnedawayIperceivedRansomelookingatmeblankly。Heappreciatedwhatitmeant,butmanagedtoproducehispleasant,wistfulsmile。

  Thenhesteppedbackintohispantry,andIrushedupondeckagaintoseewhethertherewasanywind,anybreathunderthesky,anystiroftheair,anysignofhope。Thedeadlystillnessmetmeagain。Nothingwaschangedexceptthattherewasadifferentmanatthewheel。Helookedill。

  Hiswholefiguredrooped,andheseemedrathertoclingtothespokesthanholdthemwithacontroll-

  inggrip。Isaidtohim:

  \"Youarenotfittobehere。\"

  \"Icanmanage,sir,\"hesaidfeebly。

  Asamatteroffact,therewasnothingforhimtodo。

  Theshiphadnosteerageway。Shelaywithherheadtothewestward,theeverlastingKoh-ringvisibleoverthestern,withafewsmallislets,blackspotsinthegreatblaze,swimmingbeforemytroubledeyes。Andbutforthosebitsoflandtherewasnospeckonthesky,nospeckonthewater,noshapeofvapour,nowispofsmoke,nosail,noboat,nostirofhumanity,nosignoflife,nothing!

  Thefirstquestionwas,whattodo?Whatcouldonedo?Thefirstthingtodoobviouslywastotellthemen。Ididitthatveryday。Iwasn’tgoingtolettheknowledgesimplygetabout。Iwouldfacethem。Theywereassembledonthequarter-

  deckforthepurpose。JustbeforeIsteppedouttospeaktothemIdiscoveredthatlifecouldholdterriblemoments。Noconfessedcriminalhadeverbeensooppressedbyhissenseofguilt。Thisiswhy,perhaps,myfacewassethardandmyvoicecurtandunemotionalwhileImademydeclarationthatIcoulddonothingmoreforthesickinthewayofdrugs。Astosuchcareascouldbegiventhemtheyknewtheyhadhadit。

  Iwouldhaveheldthemjustifiedintearingmelimbfromlimb。Thesilencewhichfolloweduponmywordswasalmosthardertobearthantheangriestuproar。Iwascrushedbytheinfinitedepthofitsreproach。But,asamatteroffact,I

  wasmistaken。InavoicewhichIhadgreatdiffi-

  cultyinkeepingfirm,Iwenton:\"Isuppose,men,youhaveunderstoodwhatIsaid,andyouknowwhatitmeans。\"

  Avoiceortwowereheard:\"Yes,sir……Weunderstand。\"

  Theyhadkeptsilentsimplybecausetheythoughtthattheywerenotcalledtosayanything;

  andwhenItoldthemthatIintendedtorunintoSingaporeandthatthebestchancefortheshipandthemenwasintheeffortsallofus,sickandwell,mustmaketogetheralongoutofthis,Ire-

  ceivedtheencouragementofalowassentingmur-

  murandofaloudervoiceexclaiming:\"Surelythereisawayoutofthisblamedhole。\"

  ***

  HereisanextractfromthenotesIwroteatthetime。

  \"WehavelostKoh-ringatlast。FormanydaysnowIdon’tthinkIhavebeentwohoursbelowal-

  together。Iremainondeck,ofcourse,nightandday,andthenightsandthedayswheeloverusinsuccession,whetherlongorshort,whocansay?

  Allsenseoftimeislostinthemonotonyofex-

  pectation,ofhope,andofdesire——whichisonlyone:Gettheshiptothesouthward!Gettheshiptothesouthward!Theeffectiscuriouslyme-

  chanical;thesunclimbsanddescends,thenightswingsoverourheadsasifsomebodybelowthehorizonwereturningacrank。Itistheprettiest,themostaimless!……andallthroughthatmiserableperformanceIgoon,tramping,tramp-

  ingthedeck。HowmanymileshaveIwalkedonthepoopofthatship!Astubbornpilgrimageofsheerrestlessness,diversifiedbyshortexcursionsbelowtolookuponMr。Burns。Idon’tknowwhetheritisanillusion,butheseemstobecomemoresubstantialfromdaytoday。Hedoesn’tsaymuch,for,indeed,thesituationdoesn’tlenditselftoidleremarks。InoticethisevenwiththemenasIwatchthemmovingorsittingaboutthedecks。

  Theydon’ttalktoeachother。Itstrikesmethatifthereexistsaninvisibleearcatchingthewhispersoftheearth,itwillfindthisshipthemostsilentspotonit……

  \"No,Mr。Burnshasnotmuchtosaytome。Hesitsinhisbunkwithhisbeardgone,hismoustachesflaming,andwithanairofsilentdeterminationonhischalkyphysiognomy。Ransometellsmehedevoursallthefoodthatisgivenhimtothelastscrap,butthat,apparently,hesleepsverylittle。

  Evenatnight,whenIgobelowtofillmypipe,I

  noticethat,thoughdozingflatonhisback,hestilllooksverydetermined。Fromthesideglancehegivesmewhenawakeitseemsasthoughhewereannoyedatbeinginterruptedinsomearduousmentaloperation;andasIemergeondecktheorderedarrangementofthestarsmeetsmyeye,un-

  clouded,infinitelywearisome。Theretheyare:

  stars,sun,sea,light,darkness,space,greatwaters;

  theformidableWorkoftheSevenDays,intowhichmankindseemstohaveblunderedunbidden。Orelsedecoyed。EvenasIhavebeendecoyedintothisawful,thisdeath-hauntedcommand……\"

  ***

  Theonlyspotoflightintheshipatnightwasthatofthecompass-lamps,lightingupthefacesofthesucceedinghelmsmen;fortherestwewerelostinthedarkness,Iwalkingthepoopandthemenlyingaboutthedecks。Theywereallsoreducedbysicknessthatnowatchescouldbekept。Thosewhowereabletowalkremainedallthetimeonduty,lyingaboutintheshadowsofthemaindeck,tillmyvoiceraisedforanorderwouldbringthemtotheirenfeebledfeet,atotteringlittlegroup,mov-

  ingpatentlyabouttheship,withhardlyamur-

  mur,awhisperamongstthemall。AndeverytimeIhadtoraisemyvoiceitwaswithapangofremorseandpity。

  Thenaboutfouro’clockinthemorningalightwouldgleamforwardinthegalley。TheunfailingRansomewiththeuneasyheart,immune,serene,andactive,wasgettingreadyfortheearlycoffeeforthemen。Presentlyhewouldbringmeacupuponthepoop,anditwasthenthatIallowedmyselftodropintomydeckchairforacoupleofhoursofrealsleep。NodoubtImusthavebeensnatchingshortdozeswhenleaningagainsttherailforamo-

  mentinsheerexhaustion;but,honestly,Iwasnotawareofthem,exceptinthepainfulformofcon-

  vulsivestartsthatseemedtocomeonmeevenwhileIwalked。Fromaboutfive,however,untilaftersevenIwouldsleepopenlyunderthefadingstars。

  Iwouldsaytothehelmsman:\"Callmeatneed,\"anddropintothatchairandclosemyeyes,feelingthattherewasnomoresleepformeonearth。AndthenIwouldknownothingtill,sometimebetweensevenandeight,IwouldfeelatouchonmyshoulderandlookupatRansome’sface,withitsfaint,wistfulsmileandfriendly,grayeyes,asthoughheweretenderlyamusedatmyslumbers。Occasionallythesecondmatewouldcomeupandrelievemeatearlycoffeetime。Butitdidn’treallymatter。Generallyitwasadeadcalm,orelsefaintairssochangingandfugitivethatitreallywasn’tworthwhiletotouchabraceforthem。Iftheairsteadiedatalltheseamanatthehelmcouldbetrustedforawarningshout:

  \"Ship’sallaback,sir!\"whichlikeatrumpet-

  callwouldmakemespringafootabovethedeck。

  Thosewerethewordswhichitseemedtomewouldhavemademespringupfrometernalsleep。Butthiswasnotoften。Ihavenevermetsincesuchbreathlesssunrises。Andifthesecondmatehap-

  penedtobethere(hehadgenerallyonedayinthreefreeoffever)Iwouldfindhimsittingontheskylighthalfsenseless,asitwere,andwithanidioticgazefastenedonsomeobjectnearby——arope,acleat,abelayingpin,aringbolt。

  Thatyoungmanwasrathertroublesome。Heremainedcubbishinhissufferings。Heseemedtohavebecomecompletelyimbecile;andwhenthere-

  turnoffeverdrovehimtohiscabinbelow,thenextthingwouldbethatwewouldmisshimfromthere。

  ThefirsttimeithappenedRansomeandIwereverymuchalarmed。WestartedaquietsearchandultimatelyRansomediscoveredhimcurledupinthesail-locker,whichopenedintothelobbybyaslidingdoor。Whenremonstratedwith,hemut-

  teredsulkily,\"It’scoolinthere。\"Thatwasn’ttrue。Itwasonlydarkthere。

  Thefundamentaldefectsofhisfacewerenotim-

  provedbyitsuniformlividhue。Thediseasedis-

  closeditslowtypeinastartlingway。Itwasnotsowithmanyofthemen。Thewastageofill-

  healthseemedtoidealisethegeneralcharacterofthefeatures,bringingouttheunsuspectednobilityofsome,thestrengthofothers,andinonecasere-

  vealinganessentiallycomicaspect。Hewasashort,gingery,activemanwithanoseandchinofthePunchtype,andwhomhisshipmatescalled\"Frenchy。\"Idon’tknowwhy。HemayhavebeenaFrenchman,butIhaveneverheardhimutterasinglewordinFrench。

  Toseehimcomingafttothewheelcomfortedone。Thebluedungareetrousersturnedupthecalf,onelegalittlehigherthantheother,thecleancheckshirt,thewhitecanvascap,evidentlymadebyhimself,madeupawholeofpeculiarsmartness,andthepersistentjauntinessofhisgait,even,poorfellow,whenhecouldn’thelptottering,toldofhisinvinciblespirit。TherewasalsoamancalledGambril。Hewastheonlygrizzledpersonintheship。Hisfacewasofanausteretype。ButifIre-

  memberalltheirfaces,wastingtragicallybeforemyeyes,mostoftheirnameshavevanishedfrommymemory。

  Thewordsthatpassedbetweenuswerefewandpuerileinregardofthesituation。Ihadtoforcemyselftolookthemintheface。Iexpectedtomeetreproachfulglances。Therewerenone。Theexpressionofsufferingintheireyeswasindeedhardenoughtobear。Butthattheycouldn’thelp。

  Fortherest,Iaskmyselfwhetheritwasthetemperoftheirsoulsorthesympathyoftheirimaginationthatmadethemsowonderful,soworthyofmyun-

  dyingregard。

  Formyself,neithermysoulwashighlytempered,normyimaginationproperlyundercontrol。ThereweremomentswhenIfelt,notonlythatIwouldgomad,butthatIhadgonemadalready;sothatI

  darednotopenmylipsforfearofbetrayingmyselfbysomeinsaneshriek。LuckilyIhadonlyorderstogive,andanorderhasasteadyinginfluenceuponhimwhohastogiveit。Moreover,theseaman,theofficerofthewatch,inmewassufficientlysane。

  Iwaslikeamadcarpentermakingabox。

  WereheeversoconvincedthathewasKingofJerusalem,theboxhewouldmakewouldbeasanebox。WhatIfearedwasashrillnoteescapingmeinvoluntarilyandupsettingmybalance。Luckily,again,therewasnonecessitytoraiseone’svoice。

  Thebroodingstillnessoftheworldseemedsensitivetotheslightestsound,likeawhisperinggallery。

  Theconversationaltonewouldalmostcarryawordfromoneendoftheshiptotheother。TheterriblethingwasthattheonlyvoicethatIeverheardwasmyown。Atnightespeciallyitreverber-

  atedverylonelyamongsttheplanesoftheun-

  stirringsails。

  Mr。Burns,stillkeepingtohisbedwiththatairofsecretdetermination,wasmovedtogrumbleatmanythings。Ourinterviewswereshortfive-

  minuteaffairs,butfairlyfrequent。Iwaseverlast-

  inglydivingdownbelowtogetalight,thoughIdidnotconsumemuchtobaccoatthattime。Thepipewasalwaysgoingout;forintruthmymindwasnotcomposedenoughtoenablemetogetadecentsmoke。Likewise,formostofthetimeduringthetwenty-fourhoursIcouldhavestruckmatchesondeckandheldthemalofttilltheflameburntmyfingers。ButIalwaysusedtorunbelow。Itwasachange。Itwastheonlybreakintheincessantstrain;and,ofcourse,Mr。Burnsthroughtheopendoorcouldseemecomeinandgoouteverytime。

  Withhiskneesgatheredupunderhischinandstaringwithhisgreenisheyesoverthem,hewasaweirdfigure,andwithmyknowledgeofthecrazynotioninhishead,notaveryattractiveoneforme。

  Still,Ihadtospeaktohimnowandthen,andonedayhecomplainedthattheshipwasverysilent。

  Forhoursandhours,hesaid,hewaslyingthere,nothearingasound,tillhedidnotknowwhattodowithhimself。

  \"WhenRansomehappenstobeforwardinhisgalleyeverything’ssostillthatonemightthinkeverybodyintheshipwasdead,\"hegrumbled。

  \"TheonlyvoiceIdohearsometimesisyours,sir,andthatisn’tenoughtocheermeup。What’sthematterwiththemen?Isn’tthereoneleftthatcansingoutattheropes?\"

  \"Notone,Mr。Burns,\"Isaid。\"Thereisnobreathtospareonboardthisshipforthat。AreyouawarethattherearetimeswhenIcan’tmustermorethanthreehandstodoanything?\"

  Heaskedswiftlybutfearfully:

  \"Nobodydeadyet,sir?\"

  \"No。\"

  \"Itwouldn’tdo,\"Mr。Burnsdeclaredforcibly。

  \"Mustn’tlethim。Ifhegetsholdofonehewillgetthemall。\"

  Icriedoutangrilyatthis。IbelieveIevensworeatthedisturbingeffectofthesewords。

  Theyattackedalltheself-possessionthatwaslefttome。InmyendlessvigilinthefaceoftheenemyIhadbeenhauntedbygruesomeimagesenough。I

  hadhadvisionsofashipdriftingincalmsandswinginginlightairs,withallhercrewdyingslowlyaboutherdecks。Suchthingshadbeenknowntohappen。

  Mr。Burnsmetmyoutburstbyamysterioussilence。

  \"Lookhere,\"Isaid。\"Youdon’tbelieveyour-

  selfwhatyousay。Youcan’t。It’simpossible。

  Itisn’tthesortofthingIhavearighttoexpectfromyou。Myposition’sbadenoughwithoutbeingworriedwithyoursillyfancies。\"

  Heremainedunmoved。OnaccountofthewayinwhichthelightfellonhisheadIcouldnotbesurewhetherhehadsmiledfaintlyornot。I

  changedmytone。

  \"Listen,\"Isaid。\"It’sgettingsodesperatethatIhadthoughtforamoment,sincewecan’tmakeourwaysouth,whetherIwouldn’ttrytosteerwestandmakeanattempttoreachthemail-

  boattrack。Wecouldalwaysgetsomequininefromher,atleast。Whatdoyouthink?\"

  Hecriedout:\"No,no,no。Don’tdothat,sir。

  Youmustn’tforamomentgiveupfacingthatoldruffian。Ifyoudohewillgettheupperhandofus。\"

  Ilefthim。Hewasimpossible。Itwaslikeacaseofpossession。Hisprotest,however,wasessentiallyquitesound。Asamatteroffact,mynotionofheadingoutwestonthechanceofsight-

  ingaproblematicalsteamercouldnotbearcalmexamination。Onthesidewherewewerewehadenoughwind,atleastfromtimetotime,tostruggleontowardthesouth。Enough,atleast,tokeephopealive。ButsupposethatIhadusedthosecapriciousgustsofwindtosailawaytothewest-

  ward,intosomeregionwheretherewasnotabreathofairfordaysonend,whatthen?Perhapsmyappallingvisionofashipfloatingwithadeadcrewwouldbecomearealityforthediscoveryweeksafterwardbysomehorror-strickenmariners。

  ThatafternoonRansomebroughtmeupacupoftea,andwhilewaitingthere,trayinhand,here-

  markedintheexactlyrighttoneofsympathy:

  \"Youareholdingoutwell,sir。\"

  \"Yes,\"Isaid。\"YouandIseemtohavebeenforgotten。\"

  \"Forgotten,sir?\"

  \"Yes,bythefever-devilwhohasgotonboardthisship,\"Isaid。

  Ransomegavemeoneofhisattractive,intelli-

  gent,quickglancesandwentawaywiththetray。

  ItoccurredtomethatIhadbeentalkingsome-

  whatinMr。Burns’manner。Itannoyedme。YetoftenindarkermomentsIforgotmyselfintoanattitudetowardourtroublesmorefitforacontestagainstalivingenemy。

  Yes。Thefever-devilhadnotlaidhishandyeteitheronRansomeoronme。Buthemightatanytime。Itwasoneofthosethoughtsonehadtofightdown,keepatarm’slengthatanycost。ItwasunbearabletocontemplatethepossibilityofRansome,thehousekeeperoftheship,beinglaidlow。AndwhatwouldhappentomycommandifIgotknockedover,withMr。Burnstooweaktostandwithoutholdingontohisbed-placeandthesecondmatereducedtoastateofpermanentim-

  becility?Itwasimpossibletoimagine,orrather,itwasonlytooeasytoimagine。

  Iwasaloneonthepoop。Theshiphavingnosteerageway,Ihadsentthehelmsmanawaytositdownorliedownsomewhereintheshade。Themen’sstrengthwassoreducedthatallunnecessarycallsonithadtobeavoided。ItwastheaustereGambrilwiththegrizzlybeard。Hewentawayreadilyenough,buthewassoweakenedbyre-

  peatedboutsoffever,poorfellow,thatinordertogetdownthepoopladderhehadtoturnsidewaysandhangonwithbothhandstothebrassrail。Itwasjustsimplyheart-breakingtowatch。Yethewasneitherverymuchworsenormuchbetterthanmostofthehalf-dozenmiserablevictimsIcouldmusterupondeck。

  Itwasaterriblylifelessafternoon。Forseveraldaysinsuccessionlowcloudshadappearedinthedistance,whitemasseswithdarkconvolutionsrest-

  ingonthewater,motionless,almostsolid,andyetallthetimechangingtheiraspectssubtly。To-

  wardeveningtheyvanishedasarule。Butthisdaytheyawaitedthesettingsun,whichglowedandsmoulderedsulkilyamongstthembeforeitsankdown。Thepunctualandwearisomestarsre-

  appearedoverourmastheads,buttheairremainedstagnantandoppressive。

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