CHAPTERI
DowntheRabbit—HoleAlicewasbeginningtogetverytiredofsittingbyhersisteronthebank,andofhavingnothingtodo:onceortwiceshehadpeepedintothebookhersisterwasreading,butithadnopicturesorconversationsinit,`andwhatistheuseofabook,’
thoughtAlice`withoutpicturesorconversation?’
Soshewasconsideringinherownmind(aswellasshecould,forthehotdaymadeherfeelverysleepyandstupid),whetherthepleasureofmakingadaisy—chainwouldbeworththetroubleofgettingupandpickingthedaisies,whensuddenlyaWhiteRabbitwithpinkeyesranclosebyher。
TherewasnothingsoVERYremarkableinthat;nordidAlicethinkitsoVERYmuchoutofthewaytoheartheRabbitsaytoitself,`Ohdear!Ohdear!Ishallbelate!’(whenshethoughtitoverafterwards,itoccurredtoherthatsheoughttohavewonderedatthis,butatthetimeitallseemedquitenatural);
butwhentheRabbitactuallyTOOKAWATCHOUTOFITSWAISTCOAT—
POCKET,andlookedatit,andthenhurriedon,Alicestartedtoherfeet,foritflashedacrosshermindthatshehadneverbeforeseenarabbitwitheitherawaistcoat—pocket,orawatchtotakeoutofit,andburningwithcuriosity,sheranacrossthefieldafterit,andfortunatelywasjustintimetoseeitpopdownalargerabbit—holeunderthehedge。
InanothermomentdownwentAliceafterit,neveronceconsideringhowintheworldshewastogetoutagain。
Therabbit—holewentstraightonlikeatunnelforsomeway,andthendippedsuddenlydown,sosuddenlythatAlicehadnotamomenttothinkaboutstoppingherselfbeforeshefoundherselffallingdownaverydeepwell。
Eitherthewellwasverydeep,orshefellveryslowly,forshehadplentyoftimeasshewentdowntolookaboutherandtowonderwhatwasgoingtohappennext。First,shetriedtolookdownandmakeoutwhatshewascomingto,butitwastoodarktoseeanything;thenshelookedatthesidesofthewell,andnoticedthattheywerefilledwithcupboardsandbook—shelves;
hereandthereshesawmapsandpictureshunguponpegs。Shetookdownajarfromoneoftheshelvesasshepassed;itwaslabelled`ORANGEMARMALADE’,buttohergreatdisappointmentitwasempty:shedidnotliketodropthejarforfearofkillingsomebody,somanagedtoputitintooneofthecupboardsasshefellpastit。
`Well!’thoughtAlicetoherself,`aftersuchafallasthis,I
shallthinknothingoftumblingdownstairs!Howbravethey’llallthinkmeathome!Why,Iwouldn’tsayanythingaboutit,evenifIfelloffthetopofthehouse!’(Whichwasverylikelytrue。)
Down,down,down。WouldthefallNEVERcometoanend!`I
wonderhowmanymilesI’vefallenbythistime?’shesaidaloud。
`Imustbegettingsomewherenearthecentreoftheearth。Letmesee:thatwouldbefourthousandmilesdown,Ithink——’(for,yousee,Alicehadlearntseveralthingsofthissortinherlessonsintheschoolroom,andthoughthiswasnotaVERYgoodopportunityforshowingoffherknowledge,astherewasnoonetolistentoher,stillitwasgoodpracticetosayitover)`——yes,that’sabouttherightdistance——butthenIwonderwhatLatitudeorLongitudeI’vegotto?’(AlicehadnoideawhatLatitudewas,orLongitudeeither,butthoughttheywerenicegrandwordstosay。)
Presentlyshebeganagain。`IwonderifIshallfallrightTHROUGHtheearth!Howfunnyit’llseemtocomeoutamongthepeoplethatwalkwiththeirheadsdownward!TheAntipathies,I
think——’(shewasrathergladthereWASnoonelistening,thistime,asitdidn’tsoundatalltherightword)`——butIshallhavetoaskthemwhatthenameofthecountryis,youknow。
Please,Ma’am,isthisNewZealandorAustralia?’(andshetriedtocurtseyasshespoke——fancyCURTSEYINGasyou’refallingthroughtheair!Doyouthinkyoucouldmanageit?)`Andwhatanignorantlittlegirlshe’llthinkmeforasking!No,it’llneverdotoask:perhapsIshallseeitwrittenupsomewhere。’
Down,down,down。Therewasnothingelsetodo,soAlicesoonbegantalkingagain。`Dinah’llmissmeverymuchto—night,I
shouldthink!’(Dinahwasthecat。)`Ihopethey’llrememberhersaucerofmilkattea—time。Dinahmydear!Iwishyouweredownherewithme!Therearenomiceintheair,I’mafraid,butyoumightcatchabat,andthat’sverylikeamouse,youknow。
Butdocatseatbats,Iwonder?’AndhereAlicebegantogetrathersleepy,andwentonsayingtoherself,inadreamysortofway,`Docatseatbats?Docatseatbats?’andsometimes,`Dobatseatcats?’for,yousee,asshecouldn’tanswereitherquestion,itdidn’tmuchmatterwhichwaysheputit。Shefeltthatshewasdozingoff,andhadjustbeguntodreamthatshewaswalkinghandinhandwithDinah,andsayingtoherveryearnestly,`Now,Dinah,tellmethetruth:didyouevereatabat?’whensuddenly,thump!thump!downshecameuponaheapofsticksanddryleaves,andthefallwasover。
Alicewasnotabithurt,andshejumpedupontoherfeetinamoment:shelookedup,butitwasalldarkoverhead;beforeherwasanotherlongpassage,andtheWhiteRabbitwasstillinsight,hurryingdownit。Therewasnotamomenttobelost:
awaywentAlicelikethewind,andwasjustintimetohearitsay,asitturnedacorner,`Ohmyearsandwhiskers,howlateit’sgetting!’Shewasclosebehinditwhensheturnedthecorner,buttheRabbitwasnolongertobeseen:shefoundherselfinalong,lowhall,whichwaslitupbyarowoflampshangingfromtheroof。
Thereweredoorsallroundthehall,buttheywerealllocked;
andwhenAlicehadbeenallthewaydownonesideanduptheother,tryingeverydoor,shewalkedsadlydownthemiddle,wonderinghowshewasevertogetoutagain。
Suddenlyshecameuponalittlethree—leggedtable,allmadeofsolidglass;therewasnothingonitexceptatinygoldenkey,andAlice’sfirstthoughtwasthatitmightbelongtooneofthedoorsofthehall;but,alas!eitherthelocksweretoolarge,orthekeywastoosmall,butatanyrateitwouldnotopenanyofthem。However,onthesecondtimeround,shecameuponalowcurtainshehadnotnoticedbefore,andbehinditwasalittledooraboutfifteenincheshigh:shetriedthelittlegoldenkeyinthelock,andtohergreatdelightitfitted!
Aliceopenedthedoorandfoundthatitledintoasmallpassage,notmuchlargerthanarat—hole:shekneltdownandlookedalongthepassageintotheloveliestgardenyoueversaw。
Howshelongedtogetoutofthatdarkhall,andwanderaboutamongthosebedsofbrightflowersandthosecoolfountains,butshecouldnotevengetherheadthoughthedoorway;`andevenifmyheadwouldgothrough,’thoughtpoorAlice,`itwouldbeofverylittleusewithoutmyshoulders。Oh,howIwishIcouldshutuplikeatelescope!IthinkIcould,ifIonlyknowhowtobegin。’For,yousee,somanyout—of—the—waythingshadhappenedlately,thatAlicehadbeguntothinkthatveryfewthingsindeedwerereallyimpossible。
Thereseemedtobenouseinwaitingbythelittledoor,soshewentbacktothetable,halfhopingshemightfindanotherkeyonit,oratanyrateabookofrulesforshuttingpeopleupliketelescopes:thistimeshefoundalittlebottleonit,(`whichcertainlywasnotherebefore,’saidAlice,)androundtheneckofthebottlewasapaperlabel,withthewords`DRINKME’
beautifullyprintedonitinlargeletters。
Itwasallverywelltosay`Drinkme,’butthewiselittleAlicewasnotgoingtodoTHATinahurry。`No,I’lllookfirst,’shesaid,`andseewhetherit’smarked\"poison\"ornot’;
forshehadreadseveralnicelittlehistoriesaboutchildrenwhohadgotburnt,andeatenupbywildbeastsandotherunpleasantthings,allbecausetheyWOULDnotrememberthesimplerulestheirfriendshadtaughtthem:suchas,thatared—hotpokerwillburnyouifyouholdittoolong;andthatifyoucutyourfingerVERYdeeplywithaknife,itusuallybleeds;andshehadneverforgottenthat,ifyoudrinkmuchfromabottlemarked`poison,’itisalmostcertaintodisagreewithyou,soonerorlater。
However,thisbottlewasNOTmarked`poison,’soAliceventuredtotasteit,andfindingitverynice,(ithad,infact,asortofmixedflavourofcherry—tart,custard,pine—apple,roastturkey,toffee,andhotbutteredtoast,)sheverysoonfinisheditoff。
*******
******
*******
`Whatacuriousfeeling!’saidAlice;`Imustbeshuttinguplikeatelescope。’
Andsoitwasindeed:shewasnowonlytenincheshigh,andherfacebrightenedupatthethoughtthatshewasnowtherightsizeforgoingthroughthelittledoorintothatlovelygarden。
First,however,shewaitedforafewminutestoseeifshewasgoingtoshrinkanyfurther:shefeltalittlenervousaboutthis;`foritmightend,youknow,’saidAlicetoherself,`inmygoingoutaltogether,likeacandle。IwonderwhatIshouldbelikethen?’Andshetriedtofancywhattheflameofacandleislikeafterthecandleisblownout,forshecouldnotremembereverhavingseensuchathing。
Afterawhile,findingthatnothingmorehappened,shedecidedongoingintothegardenatonce;but,alasforpoorAlice!
whenshegottothedoor,shefoundshehadforgottenthelittlegoldenkey,andwhenshewentbacktothetableforit,shefoundshecouldnotpossiblyreachit:shecouldseeitquiteplainlythroughtheglass,andshetriedherbesttoclimbuponeofthelegsofthetable,butitwastooslippery;
andwhenshehadtiredherselfoutwithtrying,thepoorlittlethingsatdownandcried。
`Come,there’snouseincryinglikethat!’saidAlicetoherself,rathersharply;`Iadviseyoutoleaveoffthisminute!’
Shegenerallygaveherselfverygoodadvice,(thoughsheveryseldomfollowedit),andsometimesshescoldedherselfsoseverelyastobringtearsintohereyes;andoncesherememberedtryingtoboxherownearsforhavingcheatedherselfinagameofcroquetshewasplayingagainstherself,forthiscuriouschildwasveryfondofpretendingtobetwopeople。`Butit’snousenow,’thoughtpoorAlice,`topretendtobetwopeople!Why,there’shardlyenoughofmelefttomakeONErespectableperson!’
Soonhereyefellonalittleglassboxthatwaslyingunderthetable:sheopenedit,andfoundinitaverysmallcake,onwhichthewords`EATME’werebeautifullymarkedincurrants。
`Well,I’lleatit,’saidAlice,`andifitmakesmegrowlarger,Icanreachthekey;andifitmakesmegrowsmaller,Icancreepunderthedoor;soeitherwayI’llgetintothegarden,andI
don’tcarewhichhappens!’
Sheatealittlebit,andsaidanxiouslytoherself,`Whichway?Whichway?’,holdingherhandonthetopofherheadtofeelwhichwayitwasgrowing,andshewasquitesurprisedtofindthatsheremainedthesamesize:tobesure,thisgenerallyhappenswhenoneeatscake,butAlicehadgotsomuchintothewayofexpectingnothingbutout—of—the—waythingstohappen,thatitseemedquitedullandstupidforlifetogooninthecommonway。
Soshesettowork,andverysoonfinishedoffthecake。
*******
******
*******
CHAPTERII
ThePoolofTears`Curiouserandcuriouser!’criedAlice(shewassomuchsurprised,thatforthemomentshequiteforgothowtospeakgoodEnglish);`nowI’mopeningoutlikethelargesttelescopethateverwas!Good—bye,feet!’(forwhenshelookeddownatherfeet,theyseemedtobealmostoutofsight,theyweregettingsofaroff)。`Oh,mypoorlittlefeet,Iwonderwhowillputonyourshoesandstockingsforyounow,dears?I’msure_I_shan’tbeable!Ishallbeagreatdealtoofarofftotroublemyselfaboutyou:youmustmanagethebestwayyoucan;——butImustbekindtothem,’thoughtAlice,`orperhapstheywon’twalkthewayIwanttogo!Letmesee:I’llgivethemanewpairofbootseveryChristmas。’
Andshewentonplanningtoherselfhowshewouldmanageit。
`Theymustgobythecarrier,’shethought;`andhowfunnyit’llseem,sendingpresentstoone’sownfeet!Andhowoddthedirectionswilllook!
ALICE’SRIGHTFOOT,ESQ。
HEARTHRUG,NEARTHEFENDER,(WITHALICE’SLOVE)。
Ohdear,whatnonsenseI’mtalking!’
Justthenherheadstruckagainsttheroofofthehall:infactshewasnowmorethanninefeethigh,andsheatoncetookupthelittlegoldenkeyandhurriedofftothegardendoor。
PoorAlice!Itwasasmuchasshecoulddo,lyingdownononeside,tolookthroughintothegardenwithoneeye;buttogetthroughwasmorehopelessthanever:shesatdownandbegantocryagain。
`Yououghttobeashamedofyourself,’saidAlice,`agreatgirllikeyou,’(shemightwellsaythis),`togooncryinginthisway!Stopthismoment,Itellyou!’Butshewentonallthesame,sheddinggallonsoftears,untiltherewasalargepoolallroundher,aboutfourinchesdeepandreachinghalfdownthehall。
Afteratimesheheardalittlepatteringoffeetinthedistance,andshehastilydriedhereyestoseewhatwascoming。
ItwastheWhiteRabbitreturning,splendidlydressed,withapairofwhitekidglovesinonehandandalargefanintheother:hecametrottingalonginagreathurry,mutteringtohimselfashecame,`Oh!theDuchess,theDuchess!Oh!won’tshebesavageifI’vekeptherwaiting!’Alicefeltsodesperatethatshewasreadytoaskhelpofanyone;so,whentheRabbitcamenearher,shebegan,inalow,timidvoice,`Ifyouplease,sir——’TheRabbitstartedviolently,droppedthewhitekidglovesandthefan,andskurriedawayintothedarknessashardashecouldgo。
Alicetookupthefanandgloves,and,asthehallwasveryhot,shekeptfanningherselfallthetimeshewentontalking:
`Dear,dear!Howqueereverythingisto—day!Andyesterdaythingswentonjustasusual。IwonderifI’vebeenchangedinthenight?Letmethink:wasIthesamewhenIgotupthismorning?IalmostthinkIcanrememberfeelingalittledifferent。ButifI’mnotthesame,thenextquestionis,WhointheworldamI?Ah,THAT’Sthegreatpuzzle!’Andshebeganthinkingoverallthechildrensheknewthatwereofthesameageasherself,toseeifshecouldhavebeenchangedforanyofthem。
`I’msureI’mnotAda,’shesaid,`forherhairgoesinsuchlongringlets,andminedoesn’tgoinringletsatall;andI’msureIcan’tbeMabel,forIknowallsortsofthings,andshe,oh!sheknowssuchaverylittle!Besides,SHE’Sshe,andI’mI,and——ohdear,howpuzzlingitallis!I’lltryifIknowallthethingsIusedtoknow。Letmesee:fourtimesfiveistwelve,andfourtimessixisthirteen,andfourtimessevenis——ohdear!
Ishallnevergettotwentyatthatrate!However,theMultiplicationTabledoesn’tsignify:let’stryGeography。
LondonisthecapitalofParis,andParisisthecapitalofRome,andRome——no,THAT’Sallwrong,I’mcertain!ImusthavebeenchangedforMabel!I’lltryandsay\"Howdoththelittle——\"’
andshecrossedherhandsonherlapasifsheweresayinglessons,andbegantorepeatit,buthervoicesoundedhoarseandstrange,andthewordsdidnotcomethesameastheyusedtodo:——
`HowdoththelittlecrocodileImprovehisshiningtail,AndpourthewatersoftheNileOneverygoldenscale!
`Howcheerfullyheseemstogrin,Howneatlyspreadhisclaws,AndwelcomelittlefishesinWithgentlysmilingjaws!’
`I’msurethosearenottherightwords,’saidpoorAlice,andhereyesfilledwithtearsagainasshewenton,`ImustbeMabelafterall,andIshallhavetogoandliveinthatpokylittlehouse,andhavenexttonotoystoplaywith,andoh!eversomanylessonstolearn!No,I’vemadeupmymindaboutit;ifI’mMabel,I’llstaydownhere!It’llbenousetheirputtingtheirheadsdownandsaying\"Comeupagain,dear!\"Ishallonlylookupandsay\"WhoamIthen?Tellmethatfirst,andthen,ifI
likebeingthatperson,I’llcomeup:ifnot,I’llstaydownheretillI’msomebodyelse\"——but,ohdear!’criedAlice,withasuddenburstoftears,`IdowishtheyWOULDputtheirheadsdown!IamsoVERYtiredofbeingallalonehere!’
Asshesaidthisshelookeddownatherhands,andwassurprisedtoseethatshehadputononeoftheRabbit’slittlewhitekidgloveswhileshewastalking。`HowCANIhavedonethat?’shethought。`Imustbegrowingsmallagain。’Shegotupandwenttothetabletomeasureherselfbyit,andfoundthat,asnearlyasshecouldguess,shewasnowabouttwofeethigh,andwasgoingonshrinkingrapidly:shesoonfoundoutthatthecauseofthiswasthefanshewasholding,andshedroppedithastily,justintimetoavoidshrinkingawayaltogether。
`ThatWASanarrowescape!’saidAlice,agooddealfrightenedatthesuddenchange,butverygladtofindherselfstillinexistence;`andnowforthegarden!’andsheranwithallspeedbacktothelittledoor:but,alas!thelittledoorwasshutagain,andthelittlegoldenkeywaslyingontheglasstableasbefore,`andthingsareworsethanever,’thoughtthepoorchild,`forIneverwassosmallasthisbefore,never!AndIdeclareit’stoobad,thatitis!’
Asshesaidthesewordsherfootslipped,andinanothermoment,splash!shewasuptoherchininsaltwater。Herfirstideawasthatshehadsomehowfallenintothesea,`andinthatcaseIcangobackbyrailway,’shesaidtoherself。(Alicehadbeentotheseasideonceinherlife,andhadcometothegeneralconclusion,thatwhereveryougotoontheEnglishcoastyoufindanumberofbathingmachinesinthesea,somechildrendigginginthesandwithwoodenspades,thenarowoflodginghouses,andbehindthemarailwaystation。)However,shesoonmadeoutthatshewasinthepooloftearswhichshehadweptwhenshewasninefeethigh。
`IwishIhadn’tcriedsomuch!’saidAlice,assheswamabout,tryingtofindherwayout。`Ishallbepunishedforitnow,I
suppose,bybeingdrownedinmyowntears!ThatWILLbeaqueerthing,tobesure!However,everythingisqueerto—day。’
Justthensheheardsomethingsplashingaboutinthepoolalittlewayoff,andsheswamnearertomakeoutwhatitwas:atfirstshethoughtitmustbeawalrusorhippopotamus,butthensherememberedhowsmallshewasnow,andshesoonmadeoutthatitwasonlyamousethathadslippedinlikeherself。
`Woulditbeofanyuse,now,’thoughtAlice,`tospeaktothismouse?Everythingissoout—of—the—waydownhere,thatIshouldthinkverylikelyitcantalk:atanyrate,there’snoharmintrying。’Soshebegan:`OMouse,doyouknowthewayoutofthispool?Iamverytiredofswimmingabouthere,OMouse!’
(Alicethoughtthismustbetherightwayofspeakingtoamouse:
shehadneverdonesuchathingbefore,butsherememberedhavingseeninherbrother’sLatinGrammar,`Amouse——ofamouse——toamouse——amouse——Omouse!’TheMouselookedatherratherinquisitively,andseemedtohertowinkwithoneofitslittleeyes,butitsaidnothing。
`Perhapsitdoesn’tunderstandEnglish,’thoughtAlice;`I
daresayit’saFrenchmouse,comeoverwithWilliamtheConqueror。’(For,withallherknowledgeofhistory,Alicehadnoveryclearnotionhowlongagoanythinghadhappened。)Soshebeganagain:`Ouestmachatte?’whichwasthefirstsentenceinherFrenchlesson—book。TheMousegaveasuddenleapoutofthewater,andseemedtoquiveralloverwithfright。`Oh,Ibegyourpardon!’criedAlicehastily,afraidthatshehadhurtthepooranimal’sfeelings。`Iquiteforgotyoudidn’tlikecats。’
`Notlikecats!’criedtheMouse,inashrill,passionatevoice。`WouldYOUlikecatsifyouwereme?’
`Well,perhapsnot,’saidAliceinasoothingtone:`don’tbeangryaboutit。AndyetIwishIcouldshowyouourcatDinah:
Ithinkyou’dtakeafancytocatsifyoucouldonlyseeher。
Sheissuchadearquietthing,’Alicewenton,halftoherself,assheswamlazilyaboutinthepool,`andshesitspurringsonicelybythefire,lickingherpawsandwashingherface——andsheissuchanicesoftthingtonurse——andshe’ssuchacapitaloneforcatchingmice——oh,Ibegyourpardon!’criedAliceagain,forthistimetheMousewasbristlingallover,andshefeltcertainitmustbereallyoffended。`Wewon’ttalkaboutheranymoreifyou’drathernot。’
`Weindeed!’criedtheMouse,whowastremblingdowntotheendofhistail。`AsifIwouldtalkonsuchasubject!OurfamilyalwaysHATEDcats:nasty,low,vulgarthings!Don’tletmehearthenameagain!’
`Iwon’tindeed!’saidAlice,inagreathurrytochangethesubjectofconversation。`Areyou——areyoufond——of——ofdogs?’
TheMousedidnotanswer,soAlicewentoneagerly:`ThereissuchanicelittledognearourhouseIshouldliketoshowyou!
Alittlebright—eyedterrier,youknow,withoh,suchlongcurlybrownhair!Andit’llfetchthingswhenyouthrowthem,andit’llsitupandbegforitsdinner,andallsortsofthings——I
can’trememberhalfofthem——anditbelongstoafarmer,youknow,andhesaysit’ssouseful,it’sworthahundredpounds!
Hesaysitkillsalltheratsand——ohdear!’criedAliceinasorrowfultone,`I’mafraidI’veoffendeditagain!’FortheMousewasswimmingawayfromherashardasitcouldgo,andmakingquiteacommotioninthepoolasitwent。
Soshecalledsoftlyafterit,`Mousedear!Docomebackagain,andwewon’ttalkaboutcatsordogseither,ifyoudon’tlikethem!’WhentheMouseheardthis,itturnedroundandswamslowlybacktoher:itsfacewasquitepale(withpassion,Alicethought),anditsaidinalowtremblingvoice,`Letusgettotheshore,andthenI’lltellyoumyhistory,andyou’llunderstandwhyitisIhatecatsanddogs。’
Itwashightimetogo,forthepoolwasgettingquitecrowdedwiththebirdsandanimalsthathadfallenintoit:therewereaDuckandaDodo,aLoryandanEaglet,andseveralothercuriouscreatures。Aliceledtheway,andthewholepartyswamtotheshore。
CHAPTERIII
ACaucus—RaceandaLongTaleTheywereindeedaqueer—lookingpartythatassembledonthebank——thebirdswithdraggledfeathers,theanimalswiththeirfurclingingclosetothem,andalldrippingwet,cross,anduncomfortable。
Thefirstquestionofcoursewas,howtogetdryagain:theyhadaconsultationaboutthis,andafterafewminutesitseemedquitenaturaltoAlicetofindherselftalkingfamiliarlywiththem,asifshehadknownthemallherlife。Indeed,shehadquitealongargumentwiththeLory,whoatlastturnedsulky,andwouldonlysay,`Iamolderthanyou,andmustknowbetter’;
andthisAlicewouldnotallowwithoutknowinghowolditwas,and,astheLorypositivelyrefusedtotellitsage,therewasnomoretobesaid。
AtlasttheMouse,whoseemedtobeapersonofauthorityamongthem,calledout,`Sitdown,allofyou,andlistentome!I’LL
soonmakeyoudryenough!’Theyallsatdownatonce,inalargering,withtheMouseinthemiddle。Alicekepthereyesanxiouslyfixedonit,forshefeltsureshewouldcatchabadcoldifshedidnotgetdryverysoon。
`Ahem!’saidtheMousewithanimportantair,`areyouallready?
ThisisthedriestthingIknow。Silenceallround,ifyouplease!
\"WilliamtheConqueror,whosecausewasfavouredbythepope,wassoonsubmittedtobytheEnglish,whowantedleaders,andhadbeenoflatemuchaccustomedtousurpationandconquest。EdwinandMorcar,theearlsofMerciaandNorthumbria——\"’
`Ugh!’saidtheLory,withashiver。
`Ibegyourpardon!’saidtheMouse,frowning,butverypolitely:`Didyouspeak?’
`NotI!’saidtheLoryhastily。
`Ithoughtyoudid,’saidtheMouse。`——Iproceed。\"EdwinandMorcar,theearlsofMerciaandNorthumbria,declaredforhim:
andevenStigand,thepatrioticarchbishopofCanterbury,founditadvisable——\"’
`FoundWHAT?’saidtheDuck。
`FoundIT,’theMouserepliedrathercrossly:`ofcourseyouknowwhat\"it\"means。’
`Iknowwhat\"it\"meanswellenough,whenIfindathing,’saidtheDuck:`it’sgenerallyafrogoraworm。Thequestionis,whatdidthearchbishopfind?’
TheMousedidnotnoticethisquestion,buthurriedlywenton,`\"——founditadvisabletogowithEdgarAthelingtomeetWilliamandofferhimthecrown。William’sconductatfirstwasmoderate。ButtheinsolenceofhisNormans——\"Howareyougettingonnow,mydear?’itcontinued,turningtoAliceasitspoke。
`Aswetasever,’saidAliceinamelancholytone:`itdoesn’tseemtodrymeatall。’
`Inthatcase,’saidtheDodosolemnly,risingtoitsfeet,`I
movethatthemeetingadjourn,fortheimmediateadoptionofmoreenergeticremedies——’
`SpeakEnglish!’saidtheEaglet。`Idon’tknowthemeaningofhalfthoselongwords,and,what’smore,Idon’tbelieveyoudoeither!’AndtheEagletbentdownitsheadtohideasmile:
someoftheotherbirdstitteredaudibly。
`WhatIwasgoingtosay,’saidtheDodoinanoffendedtone,`was,thatthebestthingtogetusdrywouldbeaCaucus—race。’
`WhatISaCaucus—race?’saidAlice;notthatshewantedmuchtoknow,buttheDodohadpausedasifitthoughtthatSOMEBODY
oughttospeak,andnooneelseseemedinclinedtosayanything。
`Why,’saidtheDodo,`thebestwaytoexplainitistodoit。’
(And,asyoumightliketotrythethingyourself,somewinterday,IwilltellyouhowtheDodomanagedit。)
Firstitmarkedoutarace—course,inasortofcircle,(`theexactshapedoesn’tmatter,’itsaid,)andthenallthepartywereplacedalongthecourse,hereandthere。Therewasno`One,two,three,andaway,’buttheybeganrunningwhentheyliked,andleftoffwhentheyliked,sothatitwasnoteasytoknowwhentheracewasover。However,whentheyhadbeenrunninghalfanhourorso,andwerequitedryagain,theDodosuddenlycalledout`Theraceisover!’andtheyallcrowdedroundit,panting,andasking,`Butwhohaswon?’
ThisquestiontheDodocouldnotanswerwithoutagreatdealofthought,anditsatforalongtimewithonefingerpresseduponitsforehead(thepositioninwhichyouusuallyseeShakespeare,inthepicturesofhim),whiletherestwaitedinsilence。AtlasttheDodosaid,`EVERYBODYhaswon,andallmusthaveprizes。’
`Butwhoistogivetheprizes?’quiteachorusofvoicesasked。
`Why,SHE,ofcourse,’saidtheDodo,pointingtoAlicewithonefinger;andthewholepartyatoncecrowdedroundher,callingoutinaconfusedway,`Prizes!Prizes!’
Alicehadnoideawhattodo,andindespairsheputherhandinherpocket,andpulledoutaboxofcomfits,(luckilythesaltwaterhadnotgotintoit),andhandedthemroundasprizes。
Therewasexactlyonea—pieceallround。
`Butshemusthaveaprizeherself,youknow,’saidtheMouse。
`Ofcourse,’theDodorepliedverygravely。`Whatelsehaveyougotinyourpocket?’hewenton,turningtoAlice。
`Onlyathimble,’saidAlicesadly。
`Handitoverhere,’saidtheDodo。
Thentheyallcrowdedroundheroncemore,whiletheDodosolemnlypresentedthethimble,saying`Webegyouracceptanceofthiselegantthimble’;and,whenithadfinishedthisshortspeech,theyallcheered。
Alicethoughtthewholethingveryabsurd,buttheyalllookedsogravethatshedidnotdaretolaugh;and,asshecouldnotthinkofanythingtosay,shesimplybowed,andtookthethimble,lookingassolemnasshecould。
Thenextthingwastoeatthecomfits:thiscausedsomenoiseandconfusion,asthelargebirdscomplainedthattheycouldnottastetheirs,andthesmalloneschokedandhadtobepattedontheback。However,itwasoveratlast,andtheysatdownagaininaring,andbeggedtheMousetotellthemsomethingmore。
`Youpromisedtotellmeyourhistory,youknow,’saidAlice,`andwhyitisyouhate——CandD,’sheaddedinawhisper,halfafraidthatitwouldbeoffendedagain。
`Mineisalongandasadtale!’saidtheMouse,turningtoAlice,andsighing。
`ItISalongtail,certainly,’saidAlice,lookingdownwithwonderattheMouse’stail;`butwhydoyoucallitsad?’AndshekeptonpuzzlingaboutitwhiletheMousewasspeaking,sothatherideaofthetalewassomethinglikethis:——
`Furysaidtoamouse,Thathemetinthehouse,\"Letusbothgotolaw:IwillprosecuteYOU。——Come,I’lltakenodenial;Wemusthaveatrial:ForreallythismorningI’venothingtodo。\"
Saidthemousetothecur,\"Suchatrial,dearSir,Withnojuryorjudge,wouldbewastingourbreath。\"
\"I’llbejudge,I’llbejury,\"
SaidcunningoldFury:
\"I’lltrythewholecause,andcondemnyoutodeath。\"’
`Youarenotattending!’saidtheMousetoAliceseverely。
`Whatareyouthinkingof?’
`Ibegyourpardon,’saidAliceveryhumbly:`youhadgottothefifthbend,Ithink?’
`IhadNOT!’criedtheMouse,sharplyandveryangrily。
`Aknot!’saidAlice,alwaysreadytomakeherselfuseful,andlookinganxiouslyabouther。`Oh,doletmehelptoundoit!’
`Ishalldonothingofthesort,’saidtheMouse,gettingupandwalkingaway。`Youinsultmebytalkingsuchnonsense!’
`Ididn’tmeanit!’pleadedpoorAlice。`Butyou’resoeasilyoffended,youknow!’
TheMouseonlygrowledinreply。
`Pleasecomebackandfinishyourstory!’Alicecalledafterit;andtheothersalljoinedinchorus,`Yes,pleasedo!’buttheMouseonlyshookitsheadimpatiently,andwalkedalittlequicker。
`Whatapityitwouldn’tstay!’sighedtheLory,assoonasitwasquiteoutofsight;andanoldCrabtooktheopportunityofsayingtoherdaughter`Ah,mydear!LetthisbealessontoyounevertoloseYOURtemper!’`Holdyourtongue,Ma!’saidtheyoungCrab,alittlesnappishly。`You’reenoughtotrythepatienceofanoyster!’
`IwishIhadourDinahhere,IknowIdo!’saidAlicealoud,addressingnobodyinparticular。`She’dsoonfetchitback!’
`AndwhoisDinah,ifImightventuretoaskthequestion?’
saidtheLory。
Alicerepliedeagerly,forshewasalwaysreadytotalkaboutherpet:`Dinah’sourcat。Andshe’ssuchacapitaloneforcatchingmiceyoucan’tthink!Andoh,Iwishyoucouldseeherafterthebirds!Why,she’lleatalittlebirdassoonaslookatit!’
Thisspeechcausedaremarkablesensationamongtheparty。
Someofthebirdshurriedoffatonce:oneoldMagpiebeganwrappingitselfupverycarefully,remarking,`Ireallymustbegettinghome;thenight—airdoesn’tsuitmythroat!’andaCanarycalledoutinatremblingvoicetoitschildren,`Comeaway,mydears!It’shightimeyouwereallinbed!’Onvariouspretextstheyallmovedoff,andAlicewassoonleftalone。
`IwishIhadn’tmentionedDinah!’shesaidtoherselfinamelancholytone。`Nobodyseemstolikeher,downhere,andI’msureshe’sthebestcatintheworld!Oh,mydearDinah!I
wonderifIshalleverseeyouanymore!’AndherepoorAlicebegantocryagain,forshefeltverylonelyandlow—spirited。
Inalittlewhile,however,sheagainheardalittlepatteringoffootstepsinthedistance,andshelookedupeagerly,halfhopingthattheMousehadchangedhismind,andwascomingbacktofinishhisstory。
CHAPTERIV
TheRabbitSendsinaLittleBillItwastheWhiteRabbit,trottingslowlybackagain,andlookinganxiouslyaboutasitwent,asifithadlostsomething;
andshehearditmutteringtoitself`TheDuchess!TheDuchess!
Ohmydearpaws!Ohmyfurandwhiskers!She’llgetmeexecuted,assureasferretsareferrets!WhereCANIhavedroppedthem,Iwonder?’Aliceguessedinamomentthatitwaslookingforthefanandthepairofwhitekidgloves,andsheverygood—naturedlybeganhuntingaboutforthem,buttheywerenowheretobeseen——everythingseemedtohavechangedsinceherswiminthepool,andthegreathall,withtheglasstableandthelittledoor,hadvanishedcompletely。
VerysoontheRabbitnoticedAlice,asshewenthuntingabout,andcalledouttoherinanangrytone,`Why,MaryAnn,whatARE
youdoingouthere?Runhomethismoment,andfetchmeapairofglovesandafan!Quick,now!’AndAlicewassomuchfrightenedthatsheranoffatonceinthedirectionitpointedto,withouttryingtoexplainthemistakeithadmade。
`Hetookmeforhishousemaid,’shesaidtoherselfassheran。
`Howsurprisedhe’llbewhenhefindsoutwhoIam!ButI’dbettertakehimhisfanandgloves——thatis,ifIcanfindthem。’
Asshesaidthis,shecameuponaneatlittlehouse,onthedoorofwhichwasabrightbrassplatewiththename`W。RABBIT’
engraveduponit。Shewentinwithoutknocking,andhurriedupstairs,ingreatfearlestsheshouldmeettherealMaryAnn,andbeturnedoutofthehousebeforeshehadfoundthefanandgloves。
`Howqueeritseems,’Alicesaidtoherself,`tobegoingmessagesforarabbit!IsupposeDinah’llbesendingmeonmessagesnext!’Andshebeganfancyingthesortofthingthatwouldhappen:`\"MissAlice!Comeheredirectly,andgetreadyforyourwalk!\"\"Cominginaminute,nurse!ButI’vegottoseethatthemousedoesn’tgetout。\"OnlyIdon’tthink,’Alicewenton,`thatthey’dletDinahstopinthehouseifitbeganorderingpeopleaboutlikethat!’
Bythistimeshehadfoundherwayintoatidylittleroomwithatableinthewindow,andonit(asshehadhoped)afanandtwoorthreepairsoftinywhitekidgloves:shetookupthefanandapairofthegloves,andwasjustgoingtoleavetheroom,whenhereyefelluponalittlebottlethatstoodnearthelooking—
glass。Therewasnolabelthistimewiththewords`DRINKME,’
butneverthelesssheuncorkeditandputittoherlips。`IknowSOMETHINGinterestingissuretohappen,’shesaidtoherself,`wheneverIeatordrinkanything;soI’lljustseewhatthisbottledoes。Idohopeit’llmakemegrowlargeagain,forreallyI’mquitetiredofbeingsuchatinylittlething!’
Itdidsoindeed,andmuchsoonerthanshehadexpected:
beforeshehaddrunkhalfthebottle,shefoundherheadpressingagainsttheceiling,andhadtostooptosaveherneckfrombeingbroken。Shehastilyputdownthebottle,sayingtoherself`That’squiteenough——IhopeIshan’tgrowanymore——Asitis,I
can’tgetoutatthedoor——IdowishIhadn’tdrunkquitesomuch!’
Alas!itwastoolatetowishthat!Shewentongrowing,andgrowing,andverysoonhadtokneeldownonthefloor:inanotherminutetherewasnotevenroomforthis,andshetriedtheeffectoflyingdownwithoneelbowagainstthedoor,andtheotherarmcurledroundherhead。Stillshewentongrowing,and,asalastresource,sheputonearmoutofthewindow,andonefootupthechimney,andsaidtoherself`NowIcandonomore,whateverhappens。WhatWILLbecomeofme?’
LuckilyforAlice,thelittlemagicbottlehadnowhaditsfulleffect,andshegrewnolarger:stillitwasveryuncomfortable,and,asthereseemedtobenosortofchanceofherevergettingoutoftheroomagain,nowondershefeltunhappy。
`Itwasmuchpleasanterathome,’thoughtpoorAlice,`whenonewasn’talwaysgrowinglargerandsmaller,andbeingorderedaboutbymiceandrabbits。IalmostwishIhadn’tgonedownthatrabbit—hole——andyet——andyet——it’srathercurious,youknow,thissortoflife!IdowonderwhatCANhavehappenedtome!
WhenIusedtoreadfairy—tales,Ifanciedthatkindofthingneverhappened,andnowhereIaminthemiddleofone!Thereoughttobeabookwrittenaboutme,thatthereought!AndwhenIgrowup,I’llwriteone——butI’mgrownupnow,’sheaddedinasorrowfultone;`atleastthere’snoroomtogrowupanymoreHERE。’
`Butthen,’thoughtAlice,`shallINEVERgetanyolderthanI
amnow?That’llbeacomfort,oneway——nevertobeanoldwoman——
butthen——alwaystohavelessonstolearn!Oh,Ishouldn’tlikeTHAT!’
`Oh,youfoolishAlice!’sheansweredherself。`Howcanyoulearnlessonsinhere?Why,there’shardlyroomforYOU,andnoroomatallforanylesson—books!’
Andsoshewenton,takingfirstonesideandthentheother,andmakingquiteaconversationofitaltogether;butafterafewminutessheheardavoiceoutside,andstoppedtolisten。
`MaryAnn!MaryAnn!’saidthevoice。`Fetchmemyglovesthismoment!’Thencamealittlepatteringoffeetonthestairs。AliceknewitwastheRabbitcomingtolookforher,andshetrembledtillsheshookthehouse,quiteforgettingthatshewasnowaboutathousandtimesaslargeastheRabbit,andhadnoreasontobeafraidofit。
PresentlytheRabbitcameuptothedoor,andtriedtoopenit;
but,asthedooropenedinwards,andAlice’selbowwaspressedhardagainstit,thatattemptprovedafailure。Alicehearditsaytoitself`ThenI’llgoroundandgetinatthewindow。’
`THATyouwon’t’thoughtAlice,and,afterwaitingtillshefanciedsheheardtheRabbitjustunderthewindow,shesuddenlyspreadoutherhand,andmadeasnatchintheair。Shedidnotgetholdofanything,butsheheardalittleshriekandafall,andacrashofbrokenglass,fromwhichsheconcludedthatitwasjustpossibleithadfallenintoacucumber—frame,orsomethingofthesort。
Nextcameanangryvoice——theRabbit’s——`Pat!Pat!Whereareyou?’Andthenavoiceshehadneverheardbefore,`SurethenI’mhere!Diggingforapples,yerhonour!’
`Diggingforapples,indeed!’saidtheRabbitangrily。`Here!
ComeandhelpmeoutofTHIS!’(Soundsofmorebrokenglass。)
`Nowtellme,Pat,what’sthatinthewindow?’
`Sure,it’sanarm,yerhonour!’(Hepronouncedit`arrum。’)
`Anarm,yougoose!Whoeversawonethatsize?Why,itfillsthewholewindow!’
`Sure,itdoes,yerhonour:butit’sanarmforallthat。’
`Well,it’sgotnobusinessthere,atanyrate:goandtakeitaway!’
Therewasalongsilenceafterthis,andAlicecouldonlyhearwhispersnowandthen;suchas,`Sure,Idon’tlikeit,yerhonour,atall,atall!’`DoasItellyou,youcoward!’andatlastshespreadoutherhandagain,andmadeanothersnatchintheair。ThistimetherewereTWOlittleshrieks,andmoresoundsofbrokenglass。`Whatanumberofcucumber—framestheremustbe!’thoughtAlice。`Iwonderwhatthey’lldonext!Asforpullingmeoutofthewindow,IonlywishtheyCOULD!I’msureI
don’twanttostayinhereanylonger!’
Shewaitedforsometimewithouthearinganythingmore:atlastcamearumblingoflittlecartwheels,andthesoundofagoodmanyvoicesalltalkingtogether:shemadeoutthewords:
`Where’stheotherladder?——Why,Ihadn’ttobringbutone;
Bill’sgottheother——Bill!fetchithere,lad!——Here,put’emupatthiscorner——No,tie’emtogetherfirst——theydon’treachhalfhighenoughyet——Oh!they’lldowellenough;don’tbeparticular——
Here,Bill!catchholdofthisrope——Willtheroofbear?——Mindthatlooseslate——Oh,it’scomingdown!Headsbelow!’(aloudcrash)——`Now,whodidthat?——ItwasBill,Ifancy——Who’stogodownthechimney?——Nay,Ishan’t!YOUdoit!——ThatIwon’t,then!——Bill’stogodown——Here,Bill!themastersaysyou’retogodownthechimney!’
`Oh!SoBill’sgottocomedownthechimney,hashe?’saidAlicetoherself。`Shy,theyseemtoputeverythinguponBill!
Iwouldn’tbeinBill’splaceforagooddeal:thisfireplaceisnarrow,tobesure;butITHINKIcankickalittle!’
Shedrewherfootasfardownthechimneyasshecould,andwaitedtillsheheardalittleanimal(shecouldn’tguessofwhatsortitwas)scratchingandscramblingaboutinthechimneycloseaboveher:then,sayingtoherself`ThisisBill,’shegaveonesharpkick,andwaitedtoseewhatwouldhappennext。
Thefirstthingsheheardwasageneralchorusof`TheregoesBill!’thentheRabbit’svoicealong——`Catchhim,youbythehedge!’thensilence,andthenanotherconfusionofvoices——`Holduphishead——Brandynow——Don’tchokehim——Howwasit,oldfellow?
Whathappenedtoyou?Tellusallaboutit!’
Lastcamealittlefeeble,squeakingvoice,(`That’sBill,’
thoughtAlice,)`Well,Ihardlyknow——Nomore,thankye;I’mbetternow——butI’madealtooflusteredtotellyou——allIknowis,somethingcomesatmelikeaJack—in—the—box,andupIgoeslikeasky—rocket!’
`Soyoudid,oldfellow!’saidtheothers。
`Wemustburnthehousedown!’saidtheRabbit’svoice;andAlicecalledoutasloudasshecould,`Ifyoudo。I’llsetDinahatyou!’
Therewasadeadsilenceinstantly,andAlicethoughttoherself,`IwonderwhattheyWILLdonext!Iftheyhadanysense,they’dtaketheroofoff。’Afteraminuteortwo,theybeganmovingaboutagain,andAliceheardtheRabbitsay,`A
barrowfulwilldo,tobeginwith。’
`AbarrowfulofWHAT?’thoughtAlice;butshehadnotlongtodoubt,forthenextmomentashoweroflittlepebblescamerattlinginatthewindow,andsomeofthemhitherintheface。
`I’llputastoptothis,’shesaidtoherself,andshoutedout,`You’dbetternotdothatagain!’whichproducedanotherdeadsilence。
Alicenoticedwithsomesurprisethatthepebbleswereallturningintolittlecakesastheylayonthefloor,andabrightideacameintoherhead。`IfIeatoneofthesecakes,’shethought,`it’ssuretomakeSOMEchangeinmysize;andasitcan’tpossiblymakemelarger,itmustmakemesmaller,I
suppose。’
Sosheswallowedoneofthecakes,andwasdelightedtofindthatshebeganshrinkingdirectly。Assoonasshewassmallenoughtogetthroughthedoor,sheranoutofthehouse,andfoundquiteacrowdoflittleanimalsandbirdswaitingoutside。
ThepoorlittleLizard,Bill,wasinthemiddle,beingheldupbytwoguinea—pigs,whoweregivingitsomethingoutofabottle。
TheyallmadearushatAlicethemomentsheappeared;butsheranoffashardasshecould,andsoonfoundherselfsafeinathickwood。
`ThefirstthingI’vegottodo,’saidAlicetoherself,asshewanderedaboutinthewood,`istogrowtomyrightsizeagain;
andthesecondthingistofindmywayintothatlovelygarden。
Ithinkthatwillbethebestplan。’
Itsoundedanexcellentplan,nodoubt,andveryneatlyandsimplyarranged;theonlydifficultywas,thatshehadnotthesmallestideahowtosetaboutit;andwhileshewaspeeringaboutanxiouslyamongthetrees,alittlesharpbarkjustoverherheadmadeherlookupinagreathurry。
Anenormouspuppywaslookingdownatherwithlargeroundeyes,andfeeblystretchingoutonepaw,tryingtotouchher。
`Poorlittlething!’saidAlice,inacoaxingtone,andshetriedhardtowhistletoit;butshewasterriblyfrightenedallthetimeatthethoughtthatitmightbehungry,inwhichcaseitwouldbeverylikelytoeatherupinspiteofallhercoaxing。
Hardlyknowingwhatshedid,shepickedupalittlebitofstick,andhelditouttothepuppy;whereuponthepuppyjumpedintotheairoffallitsfeetatonce,withayelpofdelight,andrushedatthestick,andmadebelievetoworryit;thenAlicedodgedbehindagreatthistle,tokeepherselffrombeingrunover;andthemomentsheappearedontheotherside,thepuppymadeanotherrushatthestick,andtumbledheadoverheelsinitshurrytogetholdofit;thenAlice,thinkingitwasverylikehavingagameofplaywithacart—horse,andexpectingeverymomenttobetrampledunderitsfeet,ranroundthethistleagain;thenthepuppybeganaseriesofshortchargesatthestick,runningaverylittlewayforwardseachtimeandalongwayback,andbarkinghoarselyallthewhile,tillatlastitsatdownagoodwayoff,panting,withitstonguehangingoutofitsmouth,anditsgreateyeshalfshut。
ThisseemedtoAliceagoodopportunityformakingherescape;
soshesetoffatonce,andrantillshewasquitetiredandoutofbreath,andtillthepuppy’sbarksoundedquitefaintinthedistance。
`Andyetwhatadearlittlepuppyitwas!’saidAlice,assheleantagainstabuttercuptorestherself,andfannedherselfwithoneoftheleaves:`Ishouldhavelikedteachingittricksverymuch,if——ifI’donlybeentherightsizetodoit!Ohdear!I’dnearlyforgottenthatI’vegottogrowupagain!Letmesee——howISittobemanaged?IsupposeIoughttoeatordrinksomethingorother;butthegreatquestionis,what?’
Thegreatquestioncertainlywas,what?Alicelookedallroundherattheflowersandthebladesofgrass,butshedidnotseeanythingthatlookedliketherightthingtoeatordrinkunderthecircumstances。Therewasalargemushroomgrowingnearher,aboutthesameheightasherself;andwhenshehadlookedunderit,andonbothsidesofit,andbehindit,itoccurredtoherthatshemightaswelllookandseewhatwasonthetopofit。
Shestretchedherselfupontiptoe,andpeepedovertheedgeofthemushroom,andhereyesimmediatelymetthoseofalargecaterpillar,thatwassittingonthetopwithitsarmsfolded,quietlysmokingalonghookah,andtakingnotthesmallestnoticeofherorofanythingelse。
CHAPTERV
AdvicefromaCaterpillarTheCaterpillarandAlicelookedateachotherforsometimeinsilence:atlasttheCaterpillartookthehookahoutofitsmouth,andaddressedherinalanguid,sleepyvoice。
`WhoareYOU?’saidtheCaterpillar。
Thiswasnotanencouragingopeningforaconversation。Alicereplied,rathershyly,`I——Ihardlyknow,sir,justatpresent——
atleastIknowwhoIWASwhenIgotupthismorning,butIthinkImusthavebeenchangedseveraltimessincethen。’
`Whatdoyoumeanbythat?’saidtheCaterpillarsternly。
`Explainyourself!’
`Ican’texplainMYSELF,I’mafraid,sir’saidAlice,`becauseI’mnotmyself,yousee。’
`Idon’tsee,’saidtheCaterpillar。
`I’mafraidIcan’tputitmoreclearly,’Alicerepliedverypolitely,`forIcan’tunderstanditmyselftobeginwith;andbeingsomanydifferentsizesinadayisveryconfusing。’
`Itisn’t,’saidtheCaterpillar。
`Well,perhapsyouhaven’tfounditsoyet,’saidAlice;`butwhenyouhavetoturnintoachrysalis——youwillsomeday,youknow——andthenafterthatintoabutterfly,Ishouldthinkyou’llfeelitalittlequeer,won’tyou?’
`Notabit,’saidtheCaterpillar。
`Well,perhapsyourfeelingsmaybedifferent,’saidAlice;
`allIknowis,itwouldfeelveryqueertoME。’
`You!’saidtheCaterpillarcontemptuously。`WhoareYOU?’
Whichbroughtthembackagaintothebeginningoftheconversation。AlicefeltalittleirritatedattheCaterpillar’smakingsuchVERYshortremarks,andshedrewherselfupandsaid,verygravely,`Ithink,yououghttotellmewhoYOUare,first。’
`Why?’saidtheCaterpillar。
Herewasanotherpuzzlingquestion;andasAlicecouldnotthinkofanygoodreason,andastheCaterpillarseemedtobeinaVERYunpleasantstateofmind,sheturnedaway。
`Comeback!’theCaterpillarcalledafterher。`I’vesomethingimportanttosay!’
Thissoundedpromising,certainly:Aliceturnedandcamebackagain。
`Keepyourtemper,’saidtheCaterpillar。
`Isthatall?’saidAlice,swallowingdownherangeraswellasshecould。
`No,’saidtheCaterpillar。
Alicethoughtshemightaswellwait,asshehadnothingelsetodo,andperhapsafterallitmighttellhersomethingworthhearing。Forsomeminutesitpuffedawaywithoutspeaking,butatlastitunfoldeditsarms,tookthehookahoutofitsmouthagain,andsaid,`Soyouthinkyou’rechanged,doyou?’
`I’mafraidIam,sir,’saidAlice;`Ican’trememberthingsasIused——andIdon’tkeepthesamesizefortenminutestogether!’
`Can’trememberWHATthings?’saidtheCaterpillar。
`Well,I’vetriedtosay\"HOWDOTHTHELITTLEBUSYBEE,\"butitallcamedifferent!’Alicerepliedinaverymelancholyvoice。
`Repeat,\"YOUAREOLD,FATHERWILLIAM,\"’saidtheCaterpillar。
Alicefoldedherhands,andbegan:——
`Youareold,FatherWilliam,’theyoungmansaid,`Andyourhairhasbecomeverywhite;
Andyetyouincessantlystandonyourhead——
Doyouthink,atyourage,itisright?’
`Inmyyouth,’FatherWilliamrepliedtohisson,`Ifeareditmightinjurethebrain;
But,nowthatI’mperfectlysureIhavenone,Why,Idoitagainandagain。’
`Youareold,’saidtheyouth,`asImentionedbefore,Andhavegrownmostuncommonlyfat;
Yetyouturnedaback—somersaultinatthedoor——
Pray,whatisthereasonofthat?’
`Inmyyouth,’saidthesage,asheshookhisgreylocks,`IkeptallmylimbsverysuppleBytheuseofthisointment——oneshillingthebox——
Allowmetosellyouacouple?’
`Youareold,’saidtheyouth,`andyourjawsaretooweakForanythingtougherthansuet;
Yetyoufinishedthegoose,withthebonesandthebeak——
Prayhowdidyoumanagetodoit?’
`Inmyyouth,’saidhisfather,`Itooktothelaw,Andarguedeachcasewithmywife;
Andthemuscularstrength,whichitgavetomyjaw,Haslastedtherestofmylife。’
`Youareold,’saidtheyouth,`onewouldhardlysupposeThatyoureyewasassteadyasever;
Yetyoubalancedaneelontheendofyournose——
Whatmadeyousoawfullyclever?’
`Ihaveansweredthreequestions,andthatisenough,’
Saidhisfather;`don’tgiveyourselfairs!
DoyouthinkIcanlistenalldaytosuchstuff?
Beoff,orI’llkickyoudownstairs!’
`Thatisnotsaidright,’saidtheCaterpillar。
`NotQUITEright,I’mafraid,’saidAlice,timidly;`someofthewordshavegotaltered。’
`Itiswrongfrombeginningtoend,’saidtheCaterpillardecidedly,andtherewassilenceforsomeminutes。
TheCaterpillarwasthefirsttospeak。
`Whatsizedoyouwanttobe?’itasked。
`Oh,I’mnotparticularastosize,’Alicehastilyreplied;
`onlyonedoesn’tlikechangingsooften,youknow。’
`IDON’Tknow,’saidtheCaterpillar。
Alicesaidnothing:shehadneverbeensomuchcontradictedinherlifebefore,andshefeltthatshewaslosinghertemper。
`Areyoucontentnow?’saidtheCaterpillar。
`Well,IshouldliketobeaLITTLElarger,sir,ifyouwouldn’tmind,’saidAlice:`threeinchesissuchawretchedheighttobe。’
`Itisaverygoodheightindeed!’saidtheCaterpillarangrily,rearingitselfuprightasitspoke(itwasexactlythreeincheshigh)。
`ButI’mnotusedtoit!’pleadedpoorAliceinapiteoustone。