Theold\"Sauvage\"stoodbeforeherruineddwelling，armedwithhergun，herson’sgun，forfearoneofthosemenmightescape.
Whenshesawthatitwasended，shethrewherweaponintothebrasier.
Aloudreportfollowed.
Peoplewerecoming，thepeasants，thePrussians.
Theyfoundthewomanseatedonthetrunkofatree，calmandsatisfied.
AGermanofficer，butspeakingFrenchlikeasonofFrance，demanded：
\"Whereareyoursoldiers？\"
Shereachedherbonyarmtowardtheredheapoffirewhichwasalmostoutandansweredwithastrongvoice：
\"There！\"
Theycrowdedroundher.ThePrussianasked：
\"Howdidittakefire？\"
\"ItwasIwhosetitonfire.\"
Theydidnotbelieveher，theythoughtthatthesuddendisasterhadmadehercrazy.Whileallpressedroundandlistened，shetoldthestoryfrombeginningtoend，fromthearrivalofthelettertothelastshriekofthemenwhowereburnedwithherhouse，andneveromittedadetail.
Whenshehadfinished，shedrewtwopiecesofpaperfromherpocket，and，inordertodistinguishthembythelastgleamsofthefire，sheagainadjustedherspectacles.Thenshesaid，showingone：
\"That，thatisthedeathofVictor.\"Showingtheother，sheadded，indicatingtheredruinswithabendofthehead：\"Herearetheirnames，sothatyoucanwritehome.\"Shequietlyheldasheetofpaperouttotheofficer，whoheldherbytheshoulders，andshecontinued：
\"Youmustwritehowithappened，andyoumustsaytotheirmothersthatitwasIwhodidthat，VictoireSimon，laSauvage！Donotforget.\"
TheofficershoutedsomeordersinGerman.Theyseizedher，theythrewheragainstthewallsofherhouse，stillhot.Thentwelvemendrewquicklyupbeforeher，attwentypaces.Shedidnotmove.Shehadunderstood;shewaited.
Anorderrangout，followedinstantlybyalongreport.Abelatedshotwentoffbyitself，aftertheothers.
Theoldwomandidnotfall.Shesankasthoughtheyhadcutoffherlegs.
ThePrussianofficerapproached.Shewasalmostcutintwo，andinherwitheredhandsheheldherletterbathedwithblood.
MyfriendServaladded：
\"ItwasbywayofreprisalthattheGermansdestroyedthechateauofthedistrict，whichbelongedtome.\"
Ithoughtofthemothersofthosefourfinefellowsburnedinthathouseandofthehorribleheroismofthatothermothershotagainstthewall.
AndIpickedupalittlestone，stillblackenedbytheflames.
EPIPHANY
IshouldsayIdidrememberthatEpiphanysupperduringthewar！
exclaimedCountdeGarens，anarmycaptain.
Iwasquartermasterofcavalryatthetime，andforafortnighthadbeenscoutinginfrontoftheGermanadvanceguard.TheeveningbeforewehadcutdownafewUhlansandhadlostthreemen，oneofwhomwasthatpoorlittleRaudeville.YourememberJosephdeRaudeville，ofcourse.
Well，onthatdaymycommandingofficerorderedmetotakesixtroopersandtogoandoccupythevillageofPorterin，wheretherehadbeenfiveskirmishesinthreeweeks，andtoholditallnight.Therewerenottwentyhousesleftstanding，notadozenhousesinthatwasps’nest.SoItooktentroopersandsetoutaboutfouro’clock，andatfiveo’clock，whileitwasstillpitchdark，wereachedthefirsthousesofPorterin.
IhaltedandorderedMarchas——youknowPierredeMarchas，whoafterwardmarriedlittleMartel—Auvelin，thedaughteroftheMarquisdeMartel—
Auvelin——togoaloneintothevillage，andtoreporttomewhathesaw.
Ihadselectednothingbutvolunteers，allmenofgoodfamily.Itispleasantwhenondutynottobeforcedtobeonintimatetermswithunpleasantfellows.ThisMarchaswasassmartaspossible，cunningasafoxandsuppleasaserpent.HecouldscentthePrussiansasadogcanscentahare，coulddiscoverfoodwhereweshouldhavediedofhungerwithouthim，andobtainedinformationfromeverybody，andinformationwhichwasalwaysreliable，withincrediblecleverness.
Intenminuteshereturned.\"Allright，\"hesaid;\"therehavebeennoPrussianshereforthreedays.Itisasinisterplace，isthisvillage.
IhavebeentalkingtoaSisterofMercy，whoiscaringforfourorfivewoundedmeninanabandonedconvent.\"
Iorderedthemtorideon，andweenteredtheprincipalstreet.Ontherightandleftwecouldvaguelyseerooflesswalls，whichwerehardlyvisibleintheprofounddarkness.Hereandtherealightwasburninginaroom;somefamilyhadremainedtokeepitshousestandingaswellastheywereable;afamilyofbraveorofpoorpeople.Therainbegantofall，afine，icycoldrain，whichfrozeasitfellonourcloaks.
Thehorsesstumbledagainststones，againstbeams，againstfurniture.
Marchasguidedus，goingbeforeusonfoot，andleadinghishorsebythebridle.
\"Whereareyoutakingusto？\"Iaskedhim.Andhereplied：\"Ihaveaplaceforustolodgein，andararegoodone.\"Andwepresentlystoppedbeforeasmallhouse，evidentlybelongingtosomeproprietorofthemiddleclass.Itstoodonthestreet，wasquiteinclosed，andhadagardenintherear.
Marchasforcedopenthelockbymeansofabigstonewhichhepickedupnearthegardengate;thenhemountedthesteps，smashedinthefrontdoorwithhisfeetandshoulders，litabitofwaxcandle，whichhewasneverwithout，andwentbeforeusintothecomfortableapartmentsofsomerichprivateindividual，guidinguswithadmirableassurance，asifhelivedinthishousewhichhenowsawforthefirsttime.
Twotroopersremainedoutsidetotakecareofourhorses，andMarchassaidtostoutPonderel，whofollowedhim：\"Thestablesmustbeontheleft;Isawthataswecamein;goandputtheanimalsupthere，forwedonotneedthem\";andthen，turningtome，hesaid：\"Giveyourorders，confounditall！\"
Thisfellowalwaysastonishedme，andIrepliedwithalaugh：\"Iwillpostmysentinelsatthecountryapproachesandwillreturntoyouhere.\"
\"Howmanymenareyougoingtotake？\"
\"Five.Theotherswillrelievethematfiveo’clockintheevening.\"
\"Verywell.Leavemefourtolookafterprovisions，todothecookingandtosetthetable.Iwillgoandfindoutwherethewineishidden.\"
Iwentoff，toreconnoitrethedesertedstreetsuntiltheyendedintheopencountry，soastopostmysentriesthere.
HalfanhourlaterIwasback，andfoundMarchaslounginginagreateasy—chair，thecoveringofwhichhehadtakenoff，fromloveofluxury，ashesaid.Hewaswarminghisfeetatthefireandsmokinganexcellentcigar，whoseperfumefilledtheroom.Hewasalone，hiselbowsrestingonthearmsofthechair，hisheadsunkbetweenhisshoulders，hischeeksflushed，hiseyesbright，andlookingdelighted.
Iheardthenoiseofplatesanddishesinthenextroom，andMarchassaidtome，smilinginacontentedmanner：\"Thisisfamous;Ifoundthechampagneundertheflightofstepsoutside，thebrandy——fiftybottlesoftheveryfinestinthekitchengardenunderapeartree，whichdidnotseemtometobequitestraightwhenIlookedatitbythelightofmylantern.Asforsolids，wehavetwofowls，agoose，aduck，andthreepigeons.Theyarebeingcookedatthismoment.Itisadelightfuldistrict.\"
Isatdownoppositehim，andthefireinthegratewasburningmynoseandcheeks.\"Wheredidyoufindthiswood？\"Iasked.\"Splendidwood，\"
hereplied.\"Theowner’scarriage.Itisthepaintwhichiscausingallthisflame，anessenceofpunchandvarnish.Acapitalhouse！\"
Ilaughed，forIsawthecreaturewasfunny，andhewenton：\"FancythisbeingtheEpiphany！Ihavehadabeanputintothegoosedressing;butthereisnoqueen;itisreallyveryannoying！\"AndIrepeatedlikeanecho：\"Itisannoying，butwhatdoyouwantmetodointhematter？\"
\"Tofindsome，ofcourse.\"\"Somewomen.Women？——youmustbemad？\"\"I
managedtofindthebrandyunderthepeartree，andthechampagneunderthesteps;andyettherewasnothingtoguideme，whileasforyou，apetticoatisasurebait.Goandlook，oldfellow.\"
Helookedsograve，soconvinced，thatIcouldnottellwhetherhewasjokingornot，andsoIreplied：\"Lookhere，Marchas，areyouhavingajokewithme？\"\"Ineverjokeonduty.\"\"Butwherethedevildoyouexpectmetofindanywomen？\"\"Whereyoulike;theremustbetwoorthreeremainingintheneighborhood，soferretthemoutandbringthemhere.\"
Igotup，foritwastoohotinfrontofthefire，andMarchaswentoff：
\"Doyouwantanidea？\"\"Yes.\"\"Goandseethepriest.\"\"Thepriest？
Whatfor？\"\"Askhimtosupper，andbeghimtobringawomanwithhim.\"
\"Thepriest！Awoman！Ha！ha！ha！\"
ButMarchascontinuedwithextraordinarygravity：\"Iamnotlaughing;goandfindthepriestandtellhimhowwearesituated，and，ashemustbehorriblydull，hewillcome.Buttellhimthatwewantonewomanatleast，alady，ofcourse，sincewe，areallmenoftheworld.Heissuretoknowhisfemaleparishionersonthetipsofhisfingers，andifthereisonetosuitus，andyoumanageitwell，hewillsuggesthertoyou.\"
\"Come，come，Marchas，whatareyouthinkingof？\"\"MydearGarens，youcandothisquitewell.Itwillevenbeveryfunny.Wearewellbred，byJove！andwewillputonourmostdistinguishedmannersandourgrandeststyle.Telltheabbewhoweare，makehimlaugh，softenhisheart，coaxhimandpersuadehim！\"\"No，itisimpossible.\"
Hedrewhischairclosetomine，andasheknewmyspecialweakness，thescampcontinued：\"Justthinkwhataswaggeringthingitwillbetodoandhowamusingtotellabout;thewholearmywilltalkaboutit，anditwillgiveyouafamousreputation.\"
Ihesitated，fortheadventurerathertemptedme，andhepersisted：
\"Come，mylittleGarens.Youaretheheadofthisdetachment，andyoualonecangoandcallontheheadofthechurchinthisneighborhood.
Ibegofyoutogo，andIpromiseyouthatafterthewarIwillrelatethewholeaffairinverseintheRevuedeDeuxMondes.Youowethismuchtoyourmen，foryouhavemadethemmarchenoughduringthelastmonth.\"
Igotupatlastandasked：\"Whereisthepriest’shouse？\"\"Takethesecondturningattheendofthestreet，youwillseeanavenue，andattheendoftheavenueyouwillfindthechurch.Theparsonageisbesideit.\"AsIwentout，hecalledout：\"Tellhimthebilloffare，tomakehimhungry！\"
Idiscoveredtheecclesiastic’slittlehousewithoutanydifficulty;itwasbythesideofalarge，uglybrickchurch.Iknockedatthedoorwithmyfist，astherewasneitherbellnorknocker，andaloudvoicefrominsideasked：\"Whoisthere？\"TowhichIreplied：\"Aquartermasterofhussars.\"
Iheardthenoiseofboltsandofakeybeingturned，andfoundmyselffacetofacewithatallpriestwithalargestomach，thechestofaprizefighter，formidablehandsprojectingfromturned—upsleeves，aredface，andthelookofakindman.Igavehimamilitarysaluteandsaid：
\"Good—day，MonsieurleCure.\"
Hehadfearedasurprise，somemarauders’ambush，andhesmiledashereplied：\"Good—day，myfriend;comein.\"Ifollowedhimintoasmallroomwitharedtiledfloor，inwhichasmallfirewasburning，verydifferenttoMarchas’furnace，andhegavemeachairandsaid：\"WhatcanIdoforyou？\"\"Monsieur，allowmefirstofalltointroducemyself\";andIgavehimmycard，whichhetookandreadhalfaloud：\"LeComtedeGarens.\"
Icontinued：\"Thereareelevenofushere，Monsieurl’Abbe，fiveonpicketduty，andsixinstalledatthehouseofanunknowninhabitant.
Thenamesofthesixare：Garens，myself;PierredeMarchas，LudovicdePonderel，Barond’Streillis，KarlMassouligny，thepainter’sson，andJosephHerbon，ayoungmusician.Ihavecometoaskyou，intheirnameandmyown，todousthehonorofsuppingwithus.ItisanEpiphanysupper，MonsieurleCure，andweshouldliketomakeitalittlecheerful.\"
Thepriestsmiledandmurmured：\"Itseemstometobehardlyasuitableoccasionforamusingone’sself.\"AndIreplied：\"Wearefightingduringtheday，monsieur.Fourteenofourcomradeshavebeenkilledinamonth，andthreefellaslateasyesterday.Itiswartime.Westakeourlifeateverymoment;havewenot，therefore，therighttoamuseourselvesfreely？WeareFrenchmen，weliketolaugh，andwecanlaugheverywhere.
Ourfatherslaughedonthescaffold！Thiseveningweshouldliketocheerourselvesupalittle，likegentlemen，andnotlikesoldiers;youunderstandme，Ihope.Arewewrong？\"
Herepliedquickly：\"Youarequiteright，myfriend，andIacceptyourinvitationwithgreatpleasure.\"Thenhecalledout：\"Hermance！\"
Anoldbent，wrinkled，horriblepeasantwomanappearedandsaid：\"Whatdoyouwant？\"\"Ishallnotdineathome，mydaughter.\"\"Whereareyougoingtodinethen？\"\"Withsomegentlemen，thehussars.\"
Ifeltinclinedtosay：\"Bringyourservantwithyou，\"justtoseeMarchas’face，butIdidnotventure，andcontinued：\"Doyouknowanyoneamongyourparishioners，maleorfemale，whomIcouldinviteaswell？\"
Hehesitated，reflected，andthensaid：，\"No，Idonotknowanybody！\"
Ipersisted：\"Nobody！Come，monsieur，think;itwouldbeverynicetohavesomeladies，Imeantosay，somemarriedcouples！Iknownothingaboutyourparishioners.Thebakerandhiswife，thegrocer，the——the——
the——watchmaker——the——shoemaker——the——thedruggistwithMrs.Druggist.
Wehaveagoodspreadandplentyofwine，andweshouldbeenchantedtoleavepleasantrecollectionsofourselveswiththepeoplehere.\"
Thepriestthoughtagainforalongtime，andthensaidresolutely：\"No，thereisnobody.\"Ibegantolaugh.\"ByJove，MonsieurleCure，itisveryannoyingnottohaveanEpiphanyqueen，forwehavethebean.Come，think.Istherenotamarriedmayor，oramarrieddeputymayor，oramarriedmunicipalcouncillororaschoolmaster？\"\"No，alltheladieshavegoneaway.\"\"What，istherenotinthewholeplacesomegoodtradesman’swifewithhergoodtradesman，towhomwemightgivethispleasure，foritwouldbeapleasuretothem，agreatpleasureunderpresentcircumstances？\"
But，suddenly，thecurebegantolaugh，andlaughedsoviolentlythathefairlyshook，andpresentlyexclaimed：\"Ha！ha！ha！Ihavegotwhatyouwant，yes.Ihavegotwhatyouwant！Ha！ha！ha！Wewilllaughandenjoyourselves，mychildren;wewillhavesomefun.Howpleasedtheladieswillbe，Isay，howdelightedtheywillbe！Ha！ha！Whereareyoustaying？\"
Idescribedthehouse，andheunderstoodwhereitwas.\"Verygood，\"hesaid.\"ItbelongstoMonsieurBertin—Lavaille.Iwillbethereinhalfanhour，withfourladies！Ha！ha！ha！fourladies！\"
Hewentoutwithme，stilllaughing，andleftme，repeating：\"Thatiscapital;inhalfanhouratBertin—Lavaille’shouse.\"
Ireturnedquickly，verymuchastonishedandverymuchpuzzled.\"Coversforhowmany？\"Marchasasked，assoonashesawme.\"Eleven.Therearesixofushussars，besidesthepriestandfourladies.\"Hewasthunderstruck，andIwastriumphant.Herepeated：\"Fourladies！Didyousay，fourladies？\"\"Isaidfourwomen.\"\"Realwomen？\"\"Realwomen.\"
\"Well，acceptmycompliments！\"\"Iwill，forIdeservethem.\"
Hegotoutofhisarmchair，openedthedoor，andIsawabeautifulwhitetableclothonalongtable，roundwhichthreehussarsinblueapronsweresettingouttheplatesandglasses.\"Therearesomewomencoming！\"
Marchascried.Andthethreemenbegantodanceandtocheerwithalltheirmight.
Everythingwasready，andwewerewaiting.Wewaitedfornearlyanhour，whileadelicioussmellofroastpoultrypervadedthewholehouse.Atlast，however，aknockagainsttheshuttersmadeusalljumpupatthesamemoment.StoutPonderelrantoopenthedoor，andinlessthanaminutealittleSisterofMercyappearedinthedoorway.Shewasthin，wrinkledandtimid，andsuccessivelygreetedthefourbewilderedhussarswhosawherenter.Behindher，thenoiseofstickssoundedonthetiledfloorinthevestibule，andassoonasshehadcomeintothedrawing—
room，Isawthreeoldheadsinwhitecaps，followingeachotheronebyone，whocamein，swayingwithdifferentmovements，oneincliningtotheright，whiletheotherinclinedtotheleft.Andthreeworthywomenappeared，limping，draggingtheirlegsbehindthem，crippledbyillnessanddeformedthrougholdage，threeinfirmoldwomen，pastservice，theonlythreepensionerswhowereabletowalkinthehomepresidedoverbySisterSaint—Benedict.
Shehadturnedroundtoherinvalids，fullofanxietyforthem，andthen，seeingmyquartermaster’sstripes，shesaidtome：\"Iammuchobligedtoyouforthinkingofthesepoorwomen.Theyhaveverylittlepleasureinlife，andyouareatthesametimegivingthemagreattreatanddoingthemagreathonor.\"
Isawthepriest，whohadremainedinthedarkhallway，andwaslaughingheartily，andIbegantolaughinmyturn，especiallywhenIsawMarchas’
face.Then，motioningthenuntotheseats，Isaid：
\"Sitdown，sister;weareveryproudandveryhappythatyouhaveacceptedourunpretentiousinvitation.\"
Shetookthreechairswhichstoodagainstthewall，setthembeforethefire，ledherthreeoldwomentothem，settledthemonthem，tooktheirsticksandshawls，whichsheputintoacorner，andthen，pointingtothefirst，athinwomanwithanenormousstomach，whowasevidentlysufferingfromthedropsy，shesaid：\"ThisisMotherPaumelle;whosehusbandwaskilledbyfallingfromaroof，andwhosesondiedinAfrica;sheissixtyyearsold.\"Thenshepointedtoanother，atallwoman，whoseheadtrembledunceasingly：\"ThisisMotherJean—Jean，whoissixty—seven.Sheisnearlyblind，forherfacewasterriblysingedinafire，andherrightlegwashalfburnedoff.\"
Thenshepointedtothethird，asortofdwarf，withprotruding，round，stupideyes，whichsherolledincessantlyinalldirections，\"ThisisLaPutois，anidiot.Sheisonlyforty—four.\"
IbowedtothethreewomenasifIwerebeingpresentedtosomeroyalhighnesses，andturningtothepriest，Isaid：\"Youareanexcellentman，Monsieurl’Abbe，towhomallofushereoweadebtofgratitude.\"
Everybodywaslaughing，infact，exceptMarchas，whoseemedfurious，andjustthenKarlMassoulignycried：\"SisterSaint—Benedict，supperisonthetable！\"
Imadehergofirstwiththepriest，thenIhelpedupMotherPaumelle，whosearmItookanddraggedherintothenextroom，whichwasnoeasytask，forsheseemedheavierthanalumpofiron.
StoutPonderelgavehisarmtoMotherJean—Jean，whobemoanedhercrutch，andlittleJosephHerbontooktheidiot，LaPutois，tothedining—room，whichwasfilledwiththeodoroftheviands.
Assoonaswewereoppositeourplates，thesisterclappedherhandsthreetimes，and，withtheprecisionofsoldierspresentingarms，thewomenmadearapidsignofthecross，andthenthepriestslowlyrepeatedtheBenedictusinLatin.Thenwesatdown，andthetwofowlsappeared，broughtinbyMarchas，whochosetowaitattable，ratherthantositdownasaguesttothisridiculousrepast.
ButIcried：\"Bringthechampagneatonce！\"andacorkflewoutwiththenoiseofapistol，andinspiteoftheresistanceofthepriestandofthekindsister，thethreehussars，sittingbythesideofthethreeinvalids，emptiedtheirthreefullglassesdowntheirthroatsbyforce.
Massouligny，whopossessedthefacultyofmakinghimselfathome，andofbeingongoodtermswitheveryone，whereverhewas，madelovetoMotherPaumelleinthedrollestmanner.Thedropsicalwoman，whohadretainedhercheerfulnessinspiteofhermisfortunes，answeredhimbanteringlyinahighfalsettovoicewhichappearedasifitwereputon，andshelaughedsoheartilyatherneighbor’sjokesthatitwasquitealarming.
LittleHerbonhadseriouslyundertakenthetaskofmakingtheidiotdrunk，andBarond’Streillis，whosewitswerenotalwaysparticularlysharp，wasquestioningoldJean—Jeanaboutthelife，thehabits，andtherulesofthehospital.
ThenunsaidtoMassoulignyinconsternation：
\"Oh！oh！youwillmakeherill;praydonotmakeherlaughlikethat，monsieur.Oh！monsieur——\"ThenshegotupandrushedatHerbontotakefromhimafullglasswhichhewashastilyemptyingdownLaPutois’
throat，whilethepriestshookwithlaughter，andsaidtothesister：
\"Nevermind;justthisonce，itwillnothurtthem.Doleavethemalone.\"
Afterthetwofowlstheyatetheduck，whichwasflankedbythethreepigeonsandtheblackbird，andthenthegooseappeared，smoking，golden—
brown，anddiffusingawarmodorofhot，brownedroastmeat.LaPaumelle，whowasgettinglively，clappedherhands;LaJean—Jeanleftoffansweringthebaron’snumerousquestions，andLaPutoisuttered.
gruntsofpleasure，halfcriesandhalfsighs，aslittlechildrendowhenoneshowsthemcandy.\"Allowmetotakechargeofthisanimal，\"thecuresaid.\"Iunderstandthesesortofoperationsbetterthanmostpeople.\"
\"Certainly，Monsieurl’Abbe，\"andthesistersaid：\"Howwoulditbetoopenthewindowalittle？Theyaretoowarm，andIamafraidtheywillbeill.\"
IturnedtoMarchas：\"Openthewindowforaminute.\"Hedidso;thecoldouterairasitcameinmadethecandlesflare，andthesteamfromthegoose，whichthecurewasscientificallycarving，withatablenapkinroundhisneck，whirlabout.Wewatchedhimdoingit，withoutspeakingnow，forwewereinterestedinhisattractivehandiwork，andseizedwithrenewedappetiteatthesightofthatenormousgolden—brownbird，whoselimbsfelloneafteranotherintothebrowngravyatthebottomofthedish.Atthatmoment，inthemidstofthatgreedysilencewhichkeptusallattentive，thedistantreportofashotcameinattheopenwindow.
Istartedtomyfeetsoquicklythatmychairfelldownbehindme，andI
shouted：\"Tosaddle，allofyou！You，Marches，taketwomenandgoandseewhatitis.Ishallexpectyoubackhereinfiveminutes.\"Andwhilethethreeriderswentoffatfullgallopthroughthenight，Igotintothesaddlewithmythreeremaininghussars，infrontofthestepsofthevilla，whilethecure，thesisterandthethreeoldwomenshowedtheirfrightenedfacesatthewindow.
Weheardnothingmore，exceptthebarkingofadoginthedistance.Therainhadceased，anditwascold，verycold，andsoonIheardthegallopofahorse，ofasinglehorse，comingback.ItwasMarchas，andIcalledouttohim：\"Well？\"\"Itisnothing;Francoishaswoundedanoldpeasantwhorefusedtoanswerhischallenge：’Whogoesthere？’andwhocontinuedtoadvanceinspiteoftheordertokeepoff;buttheyarebringinghimhere，andweshallseewhatisthematter.\"
Igaveordersforthehorsestobeputbackinthestable，andIsentmytwosoldierstomeettheothers，andreturnedtothehouse.Thenthecure，Marchas，andItookamattressintotheroomtolaythewoundedmanon;thesistertoreupatablenapkininordertomakelint，whilethethreefrightenedwomenremainedhuddledupinacorner.
SoonIheardtherattleofsabresontheroad，andItookacandletoshowalighttothemenwhowerereturning;andtheysoonappeared，carryingthatinert，soft，long，sinisterobjectwhichahumanbodybecomeswhenlifenolongersustainsit.
Theyputthewoundedmanonthemattressthathadbeenpreparedforhim，andIsawatthefirstglancethathewasdying.Hehadthedeathrattleandwasspittingupblood，whichranoutofthecornersofhismouthateverygasp.Themanwascoveredwithblood！Hischeeks，hisbeard，hishair，hisneckandhisclothesseemedtohavebeensoaked，tohavebeendippedinaredtub;andthatbloodstucktohim，andhadbecomeadullcolorwhichwashorribletolookat.
Thewoundedman，wrappedupinalargeshepherd’scloak，occasionallyopenedhisdull，vacanteyes，whichseemedstupidwithastonishment，likethoseofanimalswoundedbyasportsman，whichfallathisfeet，morethanhalfdeadalready，stupefiedwithterrorandsurprise.
Thecureexclaimed：\"Ah，itisoldPlacide，theshepherdfromLesMoulins.Heisdeaf，poorman，andheardnothing.Ah！Oh，God！theyhavekilledtheunhappyman！\"Thesisterhadopenedhisblouseandshirt，andwaslookingatalittleblueholeinhischest，whichwasnotbleedinganymore.\"Thereisnothingtobedone，\"shesaid.
Theshepherdwasgaspingterriblyandbringingupbloodwitheverylastbreath，andinhisthroat，totheverydepthofhislungs，theycouldhearanominousandcontinuedgurgling.Thecure，standinginfrontofhim，raisedhisrighthand，madethesignofthecross，andinaslowandsolemnvoicepronouncedtheLatinwordswhichpurifymen’ssouls，butbeforetheywerefinished，theoldman’sbodytrembledviolently，asifsomethinghadgivenwayinsidehim，andheceasedtobreathe.Hewasdead.
WhenIturnedround，Isawasightwhichwasevenmorehorriblethanthedeathstruggleofthisunfortunateman;thethreeoldwomenwerestandinguphuddledclosetogether，hideous，andgrimacingwithfearandhorror.
Iwentuptothem，andtheybegantouttershrillscreams，whileLaJean—
Jean，whoseburnedlegcouldnolongersupporther，felltothegroundatfulllength.
SisterSaint—Benedictleftthedeadman，ranuptoherinfirmoldwomen，andwithoutawordoralookforme，wrappedtheirshawlsroundthem，gavethemtheircrutches，pushedthemtothedoor，madethemgoout，anddisappearedwiththemintothedarknight.
IsawthatIcouldnotevenletahussaraccompanythem，forthemererattleofaswordwouldhavesentthemmadwithfear.
Thecurewasstilllookingatthedeadman;butatlastheturnedroundtomeandsaid：
\"Oh！Whatahorriblething！\"
THEMUSTACHE
CHATEAUDESOLLES，July30，1883.
MyDearLucy：
Ihavenonews.Weliveinthedrawing—room，lookingoutattherain.
Wecannotgooutinthisfrightfulweather，sowehavetheatricals.
Howstupidtheyare，mydear，thesedrawingentertainmentsintherepertoryofreallife！Allisforced，coarse，heavy.Thejokesarelikecannonballs，smashingeverythingintheirpassage.Nowit，nothingnatural，nosprightliness，noelegance.Theseliterarymen，intruth，knownothingofsociety.Theyareperfectlyignorantofhowpeoplethinkandtalkinourset.Idonotmindiftheydespiseourcustoms，ourconventionalities，butIdonotforgivethemfornotknowingthem.Whentheywanttobehumoroustheymakepunsthatwoulddoforabarrack;whentheytrytobejolly，theygiveusjokesthattheymusthavepickedupontheouterboulevardinthosebeerhousesartistsaresupposedtofrequent，whereonehasheardthesamestudents’jokesforfiftyyears.
SowehavetakentoTheatricals.Asweareonlytwowomen，myhusbandtakesthepartofasoubrette，and，inordertodothat，hehasshavedoffhismustache.Youcannotimagine，mydearLucy，howitchangeshim！
Inolongerrecognizehim—bydayoratnight.IfhedidnotletitgrowagainIthinkIshouldnolongerlovehim;helookssohorridlikethis.
Infact，amanwithoutamustacheisnolongeraman.Idonotcaremuchforabeard;italmostalwaysmakesamanlookuntidy.Butamustache，oh，amustacheisindispensabletoamanlyface.No，youwouldneverbelievehowtheselittlehairbristlesontheupperliparearelieftotheeyeandgoodinotherways.Ihavethoughtoverthematteragreatdealbuthardlydaretowritemythoughts.Wordslooksodifferentonpaperandthesubjectissodifficult，sodelicate，sodangerousthatitrequiresinfiniteskilltotackleit.
Well，whenmyhusbandappeared，shaven，IunderstoodatoncethatInevercouldfallinlovewithastrollingactornorapreacher，evenifitwereFatherDidon，themostcharmingofall！LaterwhenIwasalonewithhim（myhusband）itwasworsestill.Oh，mydearLucy，neverletyourselfbekissedbyamanwithoutamustache;theirkisseshavenoflavor，nonewhatever！Theynolongerhavethecharm，themellownessandthesnap—
yes，thesnap——ofarealkiss.Themustacheisthespice.
Imagineplacingtoyourlipsapieceofdry——ormoist——parchment.Thatisthekissofthemanwithoutamustache.Itisnotworthwhile.
Whencecomesthischarmofthemustache，willyoutellme？DoIknowmyself？Itticklesyourface，youfeelitapproachingyourmouthanditsendsalittleshiverthroughyoudowntothetipsofyourtoes.
Andonyourneck！Haveyoueverfeltamustacheonyourneck？Itintoxicatesyou，makesyoufeelcreepy，goestothetipsofyourfingers.
Youwriggle，shakeyourshoulders，tossbackyourhead.Youwishtogetawayandatthesametimetoremainthere;itisdelightful，butirritating.Buthowgooditis！
Alipwithoutamustacheislikeabodywithoutclothing;andonemustwearclothes，veryfew，ifyoulike，butstillsomeclothing.
Irecallasentence（utteredbyapolitician）whichhasbeenrunninginmymindforthreemonths.Myhusband，whokeepsupwiththenewspapers，readmeoneeveningaverysingularspeechbyourMinisterofAgriculture，whowascalledM.Meline.Hemayhavebeensupersededbythistime.Idonotknow.
Iwaspayingnoattention，butthenameMelinestruckme.Itrecalled，Idonotexactlyknowwhy，the’Scenesdelaviedeboheme’.Ithoughtitwasaboutsomegrisette.Thatshowshowscrapsofthespeechenteredmymind.ThisM.MelinewasmakingthisstatementtothepeopleofAmiens，Ibelieve，andIhaveeversincebeentryingtounderstandwhathemeant：\"Thereisnopatriotismwithoutagriculture！\"Well，Ihavejustdiscoveredhismeaning，andIaffirminmyturnthatthereisnolovewithoutamustache.Whenyousayitthatwayitsoundscomical，doesitnot？
Thereisnolovewithoutamustache！
\"Thereisnopatriotismwithoutagriculture，\"saidM.Meline，andhewasright，thatminister;Inowunderstandwhy.
Fromaverydifferentpointofviewthemustacheisessential.Itgivescharactertotheface.Itmakesamanlookgentle，tender，violent，amonster，arake，enterprising！Thehairyman，whodoesnotshaveoffhiswhiskers，neverhasarefinedlook，forhisfeaturesareconcealed;andtheshapeofthejawandthechinbetraysagreatdealtothosewhounderstand.
Themanwithamustacheretainshisownpeculiarexpressionandhisrefinementatthesametime.
Andhowmanydifferentvarietiesofmustachesthereare！Sometimestheyaretwisted，curled，coquettish.Thoseseemtobechieflydevotedtowomen.
Sometimestheyarepointed，sharpasneedles，andthreatening.Thatkindpreferswine，horsesandwar.
Sometimestheyareenormous，overhanging，frightful.Thesebigonesgenerallyconcealafinedisposition，akindlinessthatbordersonweaknessandagentlenessthatsavorsoftimidity.
ButwhatIadoreaboveallinthemustacheisthatitisFrench，altogetherFrench.Itcamefromourancestors，theGauls，andhasremainedtheinsigniaofournationalcharacter.
Itisboastful，gallantandbrave.Itsipswinegracefullyandknowshowtolaughwithrefinement，whilethebroad—beardedjawsareclumsyineverythingtheydo.
Irecallsomethingthatmademeweepallmytearsandalso——Iseeitnow——mademeloveamustacheonaman’sface.
Itwasduringthewar，whenIwaslivingwithmyfather.Iwasayounggirlthen.Onedaytherewasaskirmishnearthechateau.Ihadheardthefiringofthecannonandoftheartilleryallthemorning，andthateveningaGermancolonelcameandtookuphisabodeinourhouse.Heleftthefollowingday.
Myfatherwasinformedthattherewereanumberofdeadbodiesinthefields.Hehadthembroughttoourplacesothattheymightbeburiedtogether.Theywerelaidallalongthegreatavenueofpinesasfastastheybroughtthemin，onbothsidesoftheavenue，andastheybegantosmellunpleasant，theirbodieswerecoveredwithearthuntilthedeeptrenchcouldbedug.Thusonesawonlytheirheadswhichseemedtoprotrudefromtheclayeyearthandwerealmostasyellow，withtheirclosedeyes.
Iwantedtoseethem.ButwhenIsawthosetworowsoffrightfulfaces，IthoughtIshouldfaint.However，Ibegantolookatthem，onebyone，tryingtoguesswhatkindofmenthesehadbeen.
Theuniformswereconcealedbeneaththeearth，andyetimmediately，yes，immediately，mydear，IrecognizedtheFrenchmenbytheirmustache！
Someofthemhadshavedontheverydayofthebattle，asthoughtheywishedtobeelegantuptothelast;othersseemedtohaveaweek’sgrowth，butallworetheFrenchmustache，veryplain，theproudmustachethatseemstosay：\"Donottakemeformybeardedfriend，littleone;I
amabrother.\"
AndIcried，oh，IcriedagreatdealmorethanIshouldifIhadnotrecognizedthem，thepoordeadfellows.
Itwaswrongofmetotellyouthis.NowIamsadandcannotchatteranylonger.Well，good—by，dearLucy.Isendyouaheartykiss.Longlivethemustache！
JEANNE.
MADAMEBAPTISTE
ThefirstthingIdidwastolookattheclockasIenteredthewaiting—
roomofthestationatLoubain，andIfoundthatIhadtowaittwohoursandtenminutesfortheParisexpress.
Ihadwalkedtwentymilesandfeltsuddenlytired.Notseeinganythingonthestationwallstoamuseme，Iwentoutsideandstoodthererackingmybrainstothinkofsomethingtodo.Thestreetwasakindofboulevard，plantedwithacacias，andoneithersidearowofhousesofvaryingshapeanddifferentstylesofarchitecture，housessuchasoneonlyseesinasmalltown，andascendedaslighthill，attheextremeendofwhichthereweresometrees，asthoughitendedinapark.
Fromtimetotimeacatcrossedthestreetandjumpedoverthegutterscarefully.Acursniffedateverytreeandhuntedforscrapsfromthekitchens，butIdidnotseeasinglehumanbeing，andIfeltlistlessanddisheartened.WhatcouldIdowithmyself？Iwasalreadythinkingoftheinevitableandinterminablevisittothesmallcafeattherailwaystation，whereIshouldhavetositoveraglassofundrinkablebeerandtheillegiblenewspaper，whenIsawafuneralprocessioncomingoutofasidestreetintotheoneinwhichIwas，andthesightofthehearsewasarelieftome.Itwould，atanyrate，givemesomethingtodofortenminutes.
Suddenly，however，mycuriositywasaroused.Thehearsewasfollowedbyeightgentlemen，oneofwhomwasweeping，whiletheotherswerechattingtogether，buttherewasnopriest，andIthoughttomyself：
\"Thisisanon—religiousfuneral，\"andthenIreflectedthatatownlikeLoubainmustcontainatleastahundredfreethinkers，whowouldhavemadeapointofmakingamanifestation.Whatcoulditbe，then？Therapidpaceoftheprocessionclearlyprovedthatthebodywastobeburiedwithoutceremony，and，consequently，withouttheinterventionoftheChurch.
Myidlecuriosityframedthemostcomplicatedsurmises，andasthehearsepassedme，astrangeideastruckme，whichwastofollowit，withtheeightgentlemen.Thatwouldtakeupmytimeforanhour，atleast，andI
accordinglywalkedwiththeothers，withasadlookonmyface，and，onseeingthis，thetwolastturnedroundinsurprise，andthenspoketoeachotherinalowvoice.
NodoubttheywereaskingeachotherwhetherIbelongedtothetown，andthentheyconsultedthetwoinfrontofthem，whostaredatmeinturn.
Thisclosescrutinyannoyedme，andtoputanendtoitIwentuptothem，and，afterbowing，Isaid：
\"Ibegyourpardon，gentlemen，forinterruptingyourconversation，but，seeingacivilfuneral，Ihavefollowedit，althoughIdidnotknowthedeceasedgentlemanwhomyouareaccompanying.\"
\"Itwasawoman，\"oneofthemsaid.
Iwasmuchsurprisedathearingthis，andasked：
\"Butitisacivilfuneral，isitnot？\"
Theothergentleman，whoevidentlywishedtotellmeallaboutit，thensaid：\"Yesandno.Theclergyhaverefusedtoallowustheuseofthechurch.\"
OnhearingthisIutteredaprolonged\"A—h！\"ofastonishment.Icouldnotunderstanditatall，butmyobligingneighborcontinued：
\"Itisratheralongstory.Thisyoungwomancommittedsuicide，andthatisthereasonwhyshecannotbeburiedwithanyreligiousceremony.
Thegentlemanwhoiswalkingfirst，andwhoiscrying，isherhusband.\"
Irepliedwithsomehesitation：
\"Yousurpriseandinterestmeverymuch，monsieur.ShallIbeindiscreetifIaskyoutotellmethefactsofthecase？IfIamtroublingyou，forgetthatIhavesaidanythingaboutthematter.\"
Thegentlemantookmyarmfamiliarly.
\"Notatall，notatall.Letuslingeralittlebehindtheothers，andI
willtellityou，althoughitisaverysadstory.Wehaveplentyoftimebeforegettingtothecemetery，thetreesofwhichyouseeupyonder，foritisastiffpullupthishill.\"
Andhebegan：
\"Thisyoungwoman，MadamePaulHamot，wasthedaughterofawealthymerchantintheneighborhood，MonsieurFontanelle.Whenshewasamerechildofeleven，shehadashockingadventure;afootmanattackedherandshenearlydied.Aterriblecriminalcasewastheresult，andthemanwassentencedtopenalservitudeforlife.
\"Thelittlegirlgrewup，stigmatizedbydisgrace，isolated，withoutanycompanions;andgrown—uppeoplewouldscarcelykissher，fortheythoughtthattheywouldsoiltheirlipsiftheytouchedherforehead，andshebecameasortofmonster，aphenomenontoallthetown.Peoplesaidtoeachotherinawhisper：’Youknow，littleFontanelle，’andeverybodyturnedawayinthestreetswhenshepassed.Herparentscouldnotevengetanursetotakeheroutforawalk，astheotherservantsheldalooffromher，asifcontactwithherwouldpoisoneverybodywhocamenearher.
\"Itwaspitiabletoseethepoorchildgoandplayeveryafternoon.Sheremainedquitebyherself，standingbyhermaidandlookingattheotherchildrenamusingthemselves.Sometimes，yieldingtoanirresistibledesiretomixwiththeotherchildren，sheadvancedtimidly，withnervousgestures，andmingledwithagroup，withfurtivesteps，asifconsciousofherowndisgrace.Andimmediatelythemothers，auntsandnurseswouldcomerunningfromeveryseatandtakethechildrenentrustedtotheircarebythehandanddragthembrutallyaway.
\"LittleFontanelleremainedisolated，wretched，withoutunderstandingwhatitmeant，andthenshebegantocry，nearlyheartbrokenwithgrief，andthensheusedtorunandhideherheadinhernurse’slap，sobbing.
\"Asshegrewup，itwasworsestill.Theykeptthegirlsfromher，asifshewerestrickenwiththeplague.Rememberthatshehadnothingtolearn，nothing;thatshenolongerhadtherighttothesymbolicalwreathoforange—flowers;thatalmostbeforeshecouldreadshehadpenetratedthatredoubtablemysterywhichmothersscarcelyallowtheirdaughterstoguessat，tremblingastheyenlightenthemonthenightoftheirmarriage.
\"Whenshewentthroughthestreets，alwaysaccompaniedbyhergoverness，asif，herparentsfearedsomefresh，terribleadventure，withhereyescastdownundertheloadofthatmysteriousdisgracewhichshefeltwasalwaysweighinguponher，theothergirls，whowerenotnearlysoinnocentaspeoplethought，whisperedandgiggledastheylookedatherknowingly，andimmediatelyturnedtheirheadsabsently，ifshehappenedtolookatthem.Peoplescarcelygreetedher;onlyafewmenbowedtoher，andthemotherspretendednottoseeher，whilesomeyoungblackguardscalledherMadameBaptiste，afterthenameofthefootmanwhohadattackedher.
\"Nobodyknewthesecrettortureofhermind，forshehardlyeverspoke，andneverlaughed，andherparentsthemselvesappeareduncomfortableinherpresence，asiftheyboreheraconstantgrudgeforsomeirreparablefault.
\"Anhonestmanwouldnotwillinglygivehishandtoaliberatedconvict，wouldhe，evenifthatconvictwerehisownson？AndMonsieurandMadameFontanellelookedontheirdaughterastheywouldhavedoneonasonwhohadjustbeenreleasedfromthehulks.Shewasprettyandpale，tall，slender，distinguished—looking，andshewouldhavepleasedmeverymuch，monsieur，butforthatunfortunateaffair.
\"Well，whenanewsub—prefectwasappointedhere，eighteenmonthsago，hebroughthisprivatesecretarywithhim.Hewasaqueersortoffellow，whohadlivedintheLatinQuarter，itappears.HesawMademoiselleFontanelleandfellinlovewithher，andwhentoldofwhatoccurred，hemerelysaid：
’Bah！Thatisjustaguaranteeforthefuture，andIwouldratheritshouldhavehappenedbeforeImarriedherthanafterward.Ishalllivetranquillywiththatwoman.’
\"Hepaidhisaddressestoher，askedforherhandandmarriedher，andthen，notbeingdeficientinassurance，hepaidweddingcalls，asifnothinghadhappened.Somepeoplereturnedthem，othersdidnot;but，atlast，theaffairbegantobeforgotten，andshetookherproperplaceinsociety.
\"Sheadoredherhusbandasifhehadbeenagod;for，youmustremember，hehadrestoredhertohonorandtosociallife，hadbravedpublicopinion，facedinsults，and，inaword，performedsuchacourageousactasfewmenwouldundertake，andshefeltthemostexaltedandtenderloveforhim.
\"Whenshebecameenceinte，anditwasknown，themostparticularpeopleandthegreateststicklersopenedtheirdoorstoher，asifshehadbeendefinitelypurifiedbymaternity.
\"Itisstrange，butsoitis，andthuseverythingwasgoingonaswellaspossibleuntiltheotherday，whichwasthefeastofthepatronsaintofourtown.Theprefect，surroundedbyhisstaffandtheauthorities，presidedatthemusicalcompetition，andwhenhehadfinishedhisspeechthedistributionofmedalsbegan，whichPaulHamot，hisprivatesecretary，handedtothosewhowereentitledtothem.
\"Asyouknow，therearealwaysjealousiesandrivalries，whichmakepeopleforgetallpropriety.Alltheladiesofthetownwerethereontheplatform，and，inhisturn，thebandmasterfromthevillageofMourmilloncameup.Thisbandwasonlytoreceiveasecond—classmedal，foronecannotgivefirst—classmedalstoeverybody，canone？Butwhentheprivatesecretaryhandedhimhisbadge，themanthrewitinhisfaceandexclaimed：
\"’YoumaykeepyourmedalforBaptiste.Youowehimafirst—classone，also，justasyoudome.’
\"Therewereanumberofpeopletherewhobegantolaugh.Thecommonherdareneithercharitablenorrefined，andeveryeyewasturnedtowardthatpoorlady.Haveyoueverseenawomangoingmad，monsieur？Well，wewerepresentatthesight！Shegotupandfellbackonherchairthreetimesinsuccession，asifshewishedtomakeherescape，butsawthatshecouldnotmakeherwaythroughthecrowd，andthenanothervoiceinthecrowdexclaimed：
\"’Oh！Oh！MadameBaptiste！’
\"Andagreatuproar，partlyoflaughterandpartlyofindignation，arose.
Thewordwasrepeatedoverandoveragain;peoplestoodontiptoetoseetheunhappywoman’sface;husbandsliftedtheirwivesupintheirarms，sothattheymightseeher，andpeopleasked：
\"’Whichisshe？Theoneinblue？’
\"Theboyscrowedlikecocks，andlaughterwasheardallovertheplace.
\"Shedidnotmovenowonherstatechair，butsatjustasifshehadbeenputthereforthecrowdtolookat.Shecouldnotmove，norconcealherself，norhideherface.Hereyelidsblinkedquickly，asifavividlightwereshiningonthem，andshebreathedheavily，likeahorsethatisgoingupasteephill，sothatitalmostbrokeone’shearttoseeher.
Meanwhile，however，MonsieurHamothadseizedtheruffianbythethroat，andtheywererollingonthegroundtogether，amidasceneofindescribableconfusion，andtheceremonywasinterrupted.
\"Anhourlater，astheHamotswerereturninghome，theyoungwoman，whohadnotutteredawordsincetheinsult，butwhowastremblingasifallhernerveshadbeensetinmotionbysprings，suddenlysprangovertheparapetofthebridgeandthrewherselfintotheriverbeforeherhusbandcouldpreventher.Thewaterisverydeepunderthearches，anditwastwohoursbeforeherbodywasrecovered.Ofcourse，shewasdead.\"
Thenarratorstoppedandthenadded：
\"Itwas，perhaps，thebestthingshecoulddounderthecircumstances.
Therearesomethingswhichcannotbewipedout，andnowyouunderstandwhytheclergyrefusedtohavehertakenintochurch.Ah！Ifithadbeenareligiousfuneralthewholetownwouldhavebeenpresent，butyoucanunderstandthathersuicideaddedtotheotheraffairandmadefamiliesabstainfromattendingherfuneral;andthen，itisnotaneasymatterheretoattendafuneralwhichisperformedwithoutreligiousrites.\"
WepassedthroughthecemeterygatesandIwaited，muchmovedbywhatI
hadheard，untilthecoffinhadbeenloweredintothegrave，beforeI
wentuptothepoorfellowwhowassobbingviolently，topresshishandwarmly.Helookedatmeinsurprisethroughhistearsandthensaid：
\"Thankyou，monsieur.\"AndIwasnotsorrythatIhadfollowedthefuneral.
THEQUESTIONOFLATIN
ThissubjectofLatinthathasbeendinnedintoourearsforsometimepastrecallstomymindastory——astoryofmyyouth.
Iwasfinishingmystudieswithateacher，inabigcentraltown，attheInstitutionRobineau，celebratedthroughtheentireprovinceforthespecialattentionpaidtheretothestudyofLatin.
Forthepasttenyears，theRobineauInstitutebeattheimperiallyceeofthetownateverycompetitiveexamination，andallthecollegesofthesubprefecture，andtheseconstantsuccessesweredue，theysaid，toanusher，asimpleusher，M.Piquedent，orratherPerePiquedent.
Hewasoneofthosemiddle—agedmenquitegray，whoserealageitisimpossibletotell，andwhosehistorywecanguessatfirstglance.
HavingenteredasanusherattwentyintothefirstinstitutionthatpresenteditselfsothathecouldproceedtotakefirsthisdegreeofMasterofArtsandafterwardthedegreeofDoctorofLaws，hefoundhimselfsoenmeshedinthisroutinethatheremainedanusherallhislife.ButhisloveforLatindidnotleavehimandharassedhimlikeanunhealthypassion.Hecontinuedtoreadthepoets，theprosewriters，thehistorians，tointerpretthemandpenetratetheirmeaning，tocommentonthemwithaperseveranceborderingonmadness.
Oneday，theideacameintohisheadtoobligeallthestudentsinhisclasstoanswerhiminLatinonly;andhepersistedinthisresolutionuntilatlasttheywerecapableofsustaininganentireconversationwithhimjustastheywouldintheirmothertongue.Helistenedtothem，asaleaderofanorchestralistenstohismusiciansrehearsing，andstrikinghisdeskeverymomentwithhisruler，heexclaimed：
\"MonsieurLefrere，MonsieurLefrere，youarecommittingasolecism！Youforgettherule.
\"MonsieurPlantel，yourwayofexpressingyourselfisaltogetherFrenchandinnowayLatin.Youmustunderstandthegeniusofalanguage.Lookhere，listentome.\"
Now，itcametopassthatthepupilsoftheInstitutionRobineaucarriedoff，attheendoftheyear，alltheprizesforcomposition，translation，andLatinconversation.
Nextyear，theprincipal，alittleman，ascunningasanape，whomheresembledinhisgrinningandgrotesqueappearance，hadhadprintedonhisprogrammes，onhisadvertisements，andpaintedonthedoorofhisinstitution：
\"LatinStudiesaSpecialty.Fivefirstprizescarriedoffinthefiveclassesofthelycee.
\"TwohonorprizesatthegeneralexaminationsincompetitionwithallthelyceesandcollegesofFrance.\"
FortenyearstheInstitutionRobineautriumphedinthesamefashion.
Nowmyfather，alluredbythesesuccesses，sentmeasadaypupiltoRobineau’s——or，aswecalledit，RobinettoorRobinettino’s——andmademetakespecialprivatelessonsfromPerePiquedentattherateoffivefrancsperhour，outofwhichtheushergottwofrancsandtheprincipalthreefrancs.Iwastheneighteen，andwasinthephilosophyclass.
Theseprivatelessonsweregiveninalittleroomlookingoutonthestreet.ItsohappenedthatPerePiquedent，insteadoftalkingLatintome，ashedidwhenteachingpubliclyintheinstitution，kepttellingmehistroublesinFrench.Withoutrelations，withoutfriends，thepoormanconceivedanattachmenttome，andpouredouthismiserytome.
Hehadneverforthelasttenorfifteenyearschattedconfidentiallywithanyone.
\"Iamlikeanoakinadesert，\"hesaid——\"’sicutquercusinsolitudine’.\"
Theotherushersdisgustedhim.Heknewnobodyinthetown，sincehehadnotimetodevotetomakingacquaintances.
\"Noteventhenights，myfriend，andthatisthehardestthingonme.
Thedreamofmylifeistohavearoomwithmyownfurniture，myownbooks，littlethingsthatbelongtomyselfandwhichothersmaynottouch.AndIhavenothingofmyown，nothingexceptmytrousersandmyfrock—coat，nothing，notevenmymattressandmypillow！Ihavenotfourwallstoshutmyselfupin，exceptwhenIcometogivealessoninthisroom.Doyouseewhatthismeans——amanforcedtospendhislifewithouteverhavingtheright，withouteverfindingthetime，toshuthimselfupallalone，nomatterwhere，tothink，toreflect，towork，todream？Ah！
mydearboy，akey，thekeyofadoorwhichonecanlock——thisishappiness，markyou，theonlyhappiness！
\"Here，alldaylong，teachingallthoserestlessrogues，andduringthenightthedormitorywiththesamerestlessroguessnoring.AndIhavetosleepinthebedattheendoftworowsofbedsoccupiedbytheseyoungsterswhomImustlookafter.Icanneverbealone，never！IfIgooutIfindthestreetsfullofpeople，and，whenIamtiredofwalking，Igointosomecafecrowdedwithsmokersandbilliardplayers.Itellyouwhat，itisthelifeofagalleyslave.\"
Isaid：
\"Whydidyounottakeupsomeotherline，MonsieurPiquedent？\"
Heexclaimed：
\"What，mylittlefriend？Iamnotashoemaker，orajoiner，orahatter，orabaker，orahairdresser.IonlyknowLatin，andIhavenodiplomawhichwouldenablemetosellmyknowledgeatahighprice.IfIwereadoctorIwouldsellforahundredfrancswhatInowsellforahundredsous;andIwouldsupplyitprobablyofaninferiorquality，formytitlewouldbeenoughtosustainmyreputation.\"
Sometimeshewouldsaytome：
\"Ihavenorestinlifeexceptinthehoursspentwithyou.Don’tbeafraid！you’lllosenothingbythat.I’llmakeituptoyouintheclass—roombymakingyouspeaktwiceasmuchLatinastheothers.\"
Oneday，Igrewbolder，andofferedhimacigarette.Hestaredatmeinastonishmentatfirst，thenhegaveaglancetowardthedoor.
\"Ifanyoneweretocomein，mydearboy？\"
\"Well，letussmokeatthewindow，\"saidI.
Andwewentandleanedourelbowsonthewindowsilllookingonthestreet，holdingconcealedinourhandsthelittlerollspftobacco.
Justoppositetouswasalaundry.Fourwomeninloosewhitewaistswerepassinghot，heavyironsoverthelinenspreadoutbeforethem，fromwhichawarmsteamarose.
Suddenly，another，afifth，carryingonherarmalargebasketwhichmadeherstoop，cameouttotakethecustomerstheirshirts，theirhandkerchiefs，andtheirsheets.Shestoppedonthethresholdasifshewerealreadyfatigued;then，sheraisedhereyes，smiledasshesawussmoking，flungatus，withherlefthand，whichwasfree，theslykisscharacteristicofafree—and—easyworking—woman，andwentawayataslowplace，draggingherfeetasshewent.
Shewasawomanofabouttwenty，small，ratherthin，pale，ratherpretty，witharoguishairandlaughingeyesbeneathherill—combedfairhair.
PerePiquedent，affected，beganmurmuring：
\"Whatanoccupationforawoman！Reallyatradeonlyfitforahorse.\"
Andhespokewithemotionaboutthemiseryofthepeople.Hehadaheartwhichswelledwithloftydemocraticsentiment，andhereferredtothefatiguingpursuitsoftheworkingclasswithphrasesborrowedfromJean—
JacquesRousseau，andwithsobsinhisthroat.
Nextday，aswewereleaningourelbowsonthesamewindowsill，thesamewomanperceivedusandcriedouttous：
\"Good—day，scholars！\"inacomicalsortoftone，whileshemadeacontemptuousgesturewithherhands.
Iflungheracigarette，whichsheimmediatelybegantosmoke.Andthefourotherironersrushedouttothedoorwithoutstretchedhandstogetcigarettesalso.
Andeachdayafriendlyintercoursewasestablishedbetweentheworking—
womenofthepavementandtheidlersoftheboardingschool.
PerePiquedentwasreallyacomicalsight.Hetrembledatbeingnoticed，forhemightlosehisposition;andhemadetimidandridiculousgestures，quiteatheatricaldisplayoflovesignals，towhichthewomenrespondedwitharegularfusilladeofkisses.
Aperfidiousideacameintomymind.Oneday，onenteringourroom，I
saidtotheoldusherinalowtone：
\"Youwouldnotbelieveit，MonsieurPiquedent，Imetthelittlewasherwoman！YouknowtheoneImean，thewomanwhohadthebasket，andIspoketoher！\"
Heasked，ratherworriedatmymanner：
\"Whatdidshesaytoyou？\"
\"Shesaidtome——why，shesaidshethoughtyouwereverynice.Thefactofthematteris，Ibelieve，Ibelieve，thatsheisalittleinlovewithyou.\"Isawthathewasgrowingpale.
\"Sheislaughingatme，ofcourse.Thesethingsdon’thappenatmyage，\"
hereplied.
Isaidgravely：
\"Howisthat？Youareallright.\"
AsIfeltthatmytrickhadproduceditseffectonhim，Ididnotpressthematter.
ButeverydayIpretendedthatIhadmetthelittlelaundressandthatI
hadspokentoherabouthim，sothatintheendhebelievedme，andsentherardentandearnestkisses.
Nowithappenedthatonemorning，onmywaytotheboardingschool，I
reallycameacrossher.Iaccostedherwithouthesitation，asifIhadknownherforthelasttenyears.
\"Good—day，mademoiselle.Areyouquitewell？\"
\"Verywell，monsieur，thankyou.\"
\"Willyouhaveacigarette？\"
\"Oh！notinthestreet.\"
\"Youcansmokeitathome.\"
\"Inthatcase，Iwill.\"
\"Letmetellyou，mademoiselle，there’ssomethingyoudon’tknow.\"
\"Whatisthat，monsieur？\"
\"Theoldgentleman——myoldprofessor，Imean——\"
\"PerePiquedent？\"
\"Yes，PerePiquedent.Soyouknowhisname？\"
\"Faith，Ido！Whatofthat？\"
\"Well，heisinlovewithyou！\"
Sheburstoutlaughingwildly，andexclaimed：
\"Youareonlyfooling.\"
\"Oh！no，Iamnotfooling！Hekeepstalkingofyouallthroughthelesson.Ibetthathe’llmarryyou！
Sheceasedlaughing.Theideaofmarriagemakeseverygirlserious.
Thensherepeated，withanincredulousair：
\"Thisishumbug！\"
\"Isweartoyou，it’strue.\"
Shepickedupherbasketwhichshehadlaiddownatherfeet.
\"Well，we’llsee，\"shesaid.Andshewentaway.
PresentlywhenIhadreachedtheboardingschool，ItookPerePiquedentaside，andsaid：
\"Youmustwritetoher;sheisinfatuatedwithyou.\"
Andhewrotealongletter，tenderlyaffectionate，fullofphrasesandcircumlocutions，metaphorsandsimiles，philosophyandacademicgallantry;andItookonmyselftheresponsibilityofdeliveringittotheyoungwoman.
Shereaditwithgravity，withemotion;thenshemurmured：
\"Howwellhewrites！Itiseasytoseehehasgoteducation！Doeshereallymeantomarryme？\"
Irepliedintrepidly：\"Faith，hehaslosthisheadaboutyou！\"
\"ThenhemustinvitemetodinneronSundayattheIledesFleurs.\"
Ipromisedthatsheshouldbeinvited.
PerePiquedentwasmuchtouchedbyeverythingItoldhimabouther.
Iadded：
\"Shelovesyou，MonsieurPiquedent，andIbelievehertobeadecentgirl.Itisnotrighttoleadheronandthenabandonher.\"
Herepliedinafirmtone：
\"IhopeI，too，amadecentman，myfriend.\"
IconfessIhadatthetimenoplan.Iwasplayingapracticaljokeaschoolboyjoke，nothingmore.Ihadbeenawareofthesimplicityoftheoldusher，hisinnocenceandhisweakness.Iamusedmyselfwithoutaskingmyselfhowitwouldturnout.Iwaseighteen，andIhadbeenforalongtimelookeduponatthelyceeasaslypracticaljoker.
SoitwasagreedthatPerePiquedentandIshouldsetoutinahackfortheferryofQueuedeVache，thatweshouldtherepickupAngele，andthatIshouldtakethemintomyboat，forinthosedaysIwasfondofboating.IwouldthenbringthemtotheIledesFleurs，wherethethreeofuswoulddine.Ihadinflictedmyselfonthem，thebettertoenjoymytriumph，andtheusher，consentingtomyarrangement，provedclearlythathewaslosinghisheadbythusriskingthelossofhisposition.
Whenwearrivedattheferry，wheremyboathadbeenmooredsincemorning，Isawinthegrass，orratherabovethetallweedsofthebank，anenormousredparasol，resemblingamonstrouswildpoppy.BeneaththeparasolwasthelittlelaundressinherSundayclothes.Iwassurprised.
Shewasreallypretty，thoughpale;andgraceful，thoughwitharathersuburbangrace.
PerePiquedentraisedhishatandbowed.Sheputoutherhandtowardhim，andtheystaredatoneanotherwithoututteringaword.Thentheysteppedintomyboat，andItooktheoars.Theywereseatedsidebysidenearthestern.
Theusherwasthefirsttospeak.
\"Thisisniceweatherforarowinaboat.\"
Shemurmured：
\"Oh！yes.\"
Shedippedherhandintothewater，skimmingthesurface，makingathin，transparentfilmlikeasheetofglass，whichmadeasoftplashingalongthesideoftheboat.
Whentheywereintherestaurant，shetookitonherselftospeak，andordereddinner，friedfish，achicken，andsalad;thensheledusontowardtheisle，whichsheknewperfectly.
Afterthis，shewasgay，romping，andevenrathertantalizing.
Untildessert，noquestionoflovearose.Ihadtreatedthemtochampagne，andPerePiquedentwastipsy.Herselfslightlytheworse，shecalledouttohim：
\"MonsieurPiquenez.\"
Hesaidabruptly：
\"Mademoiselle，MonsieurRaoulhascommunicatedmysentimentstoyou.\"
Shebecameasseriousasajudge.
\"Yes，monsieur.\"
\"Whatisyourreply？\"
\"Weneverreplytothesequestions！\"
Hepuffedwithemotion，andwenton：
\"Well，willthedayevercomethatyouwilllikeme？\"
Shesmiled.
\"Youbigstupid！Youareverynice.\"
\"Inshort，mademoiselle，doyouthinkthat，lateron，wemight——\"
Shehesitatedasecond;theninatremblingvoiceshesaid：
\"Doyoumeantomarrymewhenyousaythat？Foronnoothercondition，youknow.\"
\"Yes，mademoiselle！\"
\"Well，that’sallright，MonsieurPiquedent！\"
Itwasthusthatthesetwosillycreaturespromisedmarriagetoeachotherthroughthetrickofayoungscamp.ButIdidnotbelievethatitwasserious，nor，indeed，didthey，perhaps.
\"Youknow，Ihavenothing，notfoursous，，\"shesaid.
Hestammered，forhewasasdrunkasSilenus：
\"Ihavesavedfivethousandfrancs.\"
Sheexclaimedtriumphantly：
\"Thenwecansetupinbusiness？\"
Hebecamerestless.
\"Inwhatbusiness？\"
\"WhatdoIknow？Weshallsee.Withfivethousandfrancswecoulddomanythings.Youdon’twantmetogoandliveinyourboardingschool，doyou？\"
Hehadnotlookedforwardsofarasthis，andhestammeredingreatperplexity：
\"Whatbusinesscouldwesetupin？Thatwouldnotdo，forallIknowisLatin！\"
Shereflectedinherturn，passinginreviewallherbusinessambitions.
\"Youcouldnotbeadoctor？\"
\"No，Ihavenodiploma.\"
\"Orachemist？\"
\"Nomorethantheother.\"
Sheutteredacryofjoy.Shehaddiscoveredit.
\"Thenwe’llbuyagrocer’sshop！Oh！whatluck！we’llbuyagrocer’sshop.Notonabigscale，ofcourse;withfivethousandfrancsonedoesnotgofar.\"
Hewasshockedatthesuggestion.
\"No，Ican’tbeagrocer.Iam——Iam——toowellknown：IonlyknowLatin，thatisallIknow.\"
Butshepouredaglassofchampagnedownhisthroat.Hedrankitandwassilent.