HereuponIgrewsohappyatbeingondrylandagain，andcometolookforLorna，withprettytreesaroundme，thatwhatdidIdobutfallasleepwiththeholly-stickinfrontofme，andmybestcoatsunkinabedofmoss，withwaterandwood-sorrel。MayhapIhadnotdoneso，noryetenjoyedthespringsomuch，ifsobeIhadnottakenthreepartsofagallonofciderathome，atPlover’sBarrows，becauseofthelownessandsinkingeversinceImetMotherMelldrum。
Therewasalittlerunnelgoingsoftlydownbesideme，fallingfromtheupperrockbythemeansofmossandgrass，asifitfearedtomakeanoise，andhadamothersleeping。Nowandthenitseemedtostop，infearofitsowndropping，andwaitforsomeorders；andthebladesofgrassthatstraightenedtoitturnedtheirpointsalittleway，andofferedtheirallegiancetowindinsteadofwater。Yetbeforetheircarklededgesbentmorethanadrivensaw，downthewatercameagainwithheavydropsandpatsofrunning，andbrightangeratneglect。
Thiswasverypleasanttome，nowandthen，togazeat，blinkingasthewaterblinked，andfallingbacktosleepagain。Suddenlymysleepwasbrokenbyashadecastoverme；betweenmeandthelowsunlightLornaDoonewasstanding。
’MasterRidd，areyoumad？’shesaid，andtookmyhandtomoveme。
’Notmad，buthalfasleep，’Ianswered，feigningnottonoticeher，thatsoshemightkeepholdofme。
’Comeaway，comeaway，ifyoucareforlife。Thepatrolwillbeheredirectly。Bequick，MasterRidd，letmehidethee。’
’Iwillnotstirastep，’saidI，thoughbeinginthegreatestfrightthatmightbewellimagined，’unlessyoucallme“John。“’
’Well，John，then——MasterJohnRidd，bequick，ifyouhaveanytocareforyou。’
’Ihavemanythatcareforme，’Isaid，justtoletherknow；’andIwillfollowyou，MistressLorna，albeitwithoutanyhurry，unlesstherebeperiltomorethanme。’
Withoutanotherwordsheledme，thoughwithmanytimidglancestowardstheuppervalley，to，andinto，herlittlebower，wheretheinletthroughtherockwas。I
amalmostsurethatIspokebeforethoughIcannotnowgoseekforit，andmymemoryisbutaworn-outtubofacertaindeepandperilouspit，inwhichIwasliketodrownmyselfthroughhurryandfrightofboyhood。AndeventhenIwonderedgreatly，andwasvexedwithLornaforsendingmeinthatheedlessmannerintosuchanentrance。Butnowitwasclearthatshehadbeenrightandthefaultmineownentirely；fortheentrancetothepitwasonlytohefoundbyseekingit。Insidethenicheofnativestone，theplainestthingofalltosee，atanyratebydaylight，wasthestairwayhewnfromrock，andleadingupthemountain，bymeansofwhichIhadescaped，asbeforerelated。Totherightsideofthiswasthemouthofthepit，stilllookingveryformidable；thoughLornalaughedatmyfearofit，forshedrewherwaterthence。Butontheleftwasanarrowcrevice，verydifficulttoespy，andhavingasweepofgreyivylaid，likeaslouchingbeaver，overit。Amanherecomingfromthebrightnessoftheouterair，witheyesdazedbythetwilight，wouldneverthinkofseeingthisandfollowingittoitsmeaning。
Lornaraisedthescreenforme，butIhadmuchadotopass，onaccountofbulkandstature。Insteadofbeingproudofmysizeasitseemedtomesheoughttobe
LornalaughedsoquietlythatIwasreadytoknockmyheadorelbowsagainstanything，andsaynomoreaboutit。However，Igotthroughatlastwithoutawordofcompliment，andbrokeintothepleasantroom，theloneretreatofLorna。
Thechamberwasofunhewnrock，round，asnearasmightbe，eighteenortwentyfeetacross，andgaywithrichvarietyoffernandmossandlichen。Thefernwasinitswinterstill，orcoilingforthespring-tide；butmosswasinabundantlife，somefeathering，andsomegobleted，andsomewithfringeofredtoit。Overheadtherewasnoceilingbuttheskyitself，flakedwithlittlecloudsofAprilwhitelywanderingoverit。Thefloorwasmadeofsoftlowgrass，mixedwithmossandprimroses；andinanicheofsheltermovedthedelicatewood-sorrel。Hereandthere，aroundthesides，were’chairsoflivingstone，’assomeLatinwritersays，whosenamehasquiteescapedme；andinthemidstatinyspringarose，withcrystalbeadsinit，andasoftvoiceasofalaughingdream，anddimpleslikeasleepingbabe。Then，aftergoingroundalittle，withsurpriseofdaylight，thewateroverwelledtheedge，andsoftlywentthroughlinesoflighttoshadowsandanuntoldbourne。
WhileIwasgazingatallthesethingswithwonderandsomesadness，Lornaturneduponmelightlyashermannerwasandsaid，——
’Wherearethenew-laideggs，MasterRidd？Orhathbluehenceasedlaying？’
Ididnotaltogetherlikethewayinwhichshesaiditwithasortofdialect，asifmyspeechcouldbelaughedat。
’Herebesome，’Ianswered，speakingasifinspiteofher。’Iwouldhavebroughttheetwiceasmany，butthatIfearedtocrushtheminthenarrowways，MistressLorna。’
AndsoIlaidherouttwodozenuponthemossoftherock-ledge，unwindingthewispofhayfromeachasitcamesafeoutofmypocket。Lornalookedwithgrowingwonder，asIaddedonetoone；andwhenIhadplacedthemsidebyside，andbiddenhernowtotellthem，tomyamazementwhatdidshedobutburstintoafloodoftears。
’WhathaveIdone？’Iasked，withshame，scarcedaringeventolookather，becausehergriefwasnotlikeAnnie’s——athingthatcouldbecoaxedaway，andleftajoyingoing——’oh，whathaveIdonetovexyouso？’
’Itisnothingdonebyyou，MasterRidd，’sheanswered，veryproudly，asifnoughtIdidcouldmatter；’itisonlysomethingthatcomesuponmewiththescentofthepuretrueclover-hay。Moreover，youhavebeentookind；andIamnotusedtokindness。’
Somesortofawkwardnesswasonme，atherwordsandweeping，asifIwouldliketosaysomething，butfearedtomakethingsworseperhapsthantheywerealready。ThereforeIabstainedfromspeech，asIwouldinmyownpain。Andasithappened，thiswasthewaytomakehertellmemoreaboutit。NotthatIwascurious，beyondwhatpityurgedmeandthestrangeaffairsaroundher；andnowIgazeduponthefloor，lestIshouldseemtowatchher；butnonethelessforthatIknewallthatshewasdoing。
Lornawentalittleway，asifshewouldnotthinkofmenorcareforonesocareless；andallmyheartgaveasuddenjump，togolikeamadthingafterher；untilsheturnedofherownaccord，andwithalittlesighcamebacktome。Hereyesweresoftwithtrouble’sshadow，andtheproudliftofherneckwasgone，andbeauty’svanitybornedownbywoman’swantofsustenance。
’MasterRidd，’shesaidinthesoftestvoicethateverflowedbetweentwolips，’haveIdoneaughttooffendyou？’
Hereuponitwenthardwithme，nottocatchherupandkissher，inthemannerinwhichshewaslooking；onlyitsmotemesuddenlythatthiswouldbealowadvantageofhertrustandhelplessness。SheseemedtoknowwhatIwouldbeat，andtodoubtverygreatlyaboutit，whetherasachildofoldshemightpermittheusage。
Allsortsofthingswentthroughmyhead，asImademyselflookawayfromher，forfearofbeingtemptedbeyondwhatIcouldbear。AndtheupshotofitwasthatIsaid，withinmyheartandthroughit，’JohnRidd，beonthyverybestmannerswiththislonelymaiden。’
Lornalikedmeallthebetterformygoodforbearance；
becauseshedidnotlovemeyet，andhadnotthoughtaboutit；atleastsofarasIknew。Andthoughhereyesweresobeauteous，soverysoftandkindly，therewastomyapprehensionsomegreatpowerinthem，asifshewouldnothaveathing，unlessherjudgmentleapedwithit。
Butnowherjudgmentleapedwithme，becauseIhadbehavedsowell；andbeingofquickurgentnature——suchasIdelightin，forthechangefrommineownslowness——she，withoutanyletorhindrance，sittingoveragainstme，nowraisingandnowdroppingfringeoverthosesweeteyesthatweretheroad-lightsofhertongue，LornatoldmeallabouteverythingIwishedtoknow，everylittlethingsheknew，exceptindeedthatpointofpoints，howMasterRiddstoodwithher。
Althoughitweariedmenowhit，itmightbewearisomeforfolkwhocannotlookatLorna，tohearthestoryallinspeech，exactlyasshetoldit；thereforeletmeputitshortly，tothebestofmyremembrance。
Nay，pardonme，whosoeverthouart，forseemingfickleandrudetothee；Ihavetriedtodoasfirstproposed，totellthetaleinmyownwords，asofanother’sfortune。But，lo!Iwasbesetatoncewithmanyheavyobstacles，whichgrewasIwentonward，untilIknewnotwhereIwas，andmingledpastandpresent。Andtwoofthesedifficultiesonlywereenoughtostopme；theonethatImustcoldlyspeakwithouttheforceofpity，theotherthatI，offandon，confusedmyselfwithLorna，asmightbewellexpected。
Thereforelethertellthestory，withherownsweetvoiceandmanner；andifyefinditwearisome，seekinyourselvestheweariness。
’Icannotgothroughallmythoughtssoastomakethemcleartoyou，norhaveIeverdweltonthings，toshapeastoryofthem。Iknownotwherethebeginningwas，norwherethemiddleoughttobe，norevenhowatthepresenttimeIfeel，orthink，oroughttothink。
IfIlookforhelptothosearoundme，whoshouldtellmerightandwrongbeingolderandmuchwiser，Imeetsometimeswithlaughter，andatothertimeswithanger。
’Therearebuttwointheworldwhoeverlistenandtrytohelpme；oneofthemismygrandfather，andtheotherisamanofwisdom，whomwecalltheCounsellor。
Mygrandfather，SirEnsorDoone，isveryoldandharshofmannerexceptindeedtome；heseemstoknowwhatisrightandwrong，butnottowanttothinkofit。
TheCounsellor，ontheotherhand，thoughfulloflifeandsubtleties，treatsmyquestionsasofplay，andnotgravelyworthhiswhiletoanswer，unlesshecanmakewitofthem。
’AndamongthewomentherearenonewithwhomIcanholdconverse，sincemyAuntSabinadied，whotooksuchpainstoteachme。Shewasaladyofhighreputeandloftyways，andlearning，butgrievedandharassedmoreandmorebythecoarseness，andtheviolence，andtheignorancearoundher。Invainshestrove，fromyeartoyear，tomaketheyoungmenhearken，toteachthemwhatbecametheirbirth，andgivethemsenseofhonour。Itwasherfavouriteword，poorthing!andtheycalledher“OldAuntHonour。“VeryoftensheusedtosaythatI
washeronlycomfort，andIamsureshewasmyonlyone；andwhenshedieditwasmoretomethanifIhadlostamother。
’ForIhavenoremembrancenowoffatherorofmother，althoughtheysaythatmyfatherwastheeldestsonofSirEnsorDoone，andthebravestandthebestofthem。
Andsotheycallmeheiresstothislittlerealmofviolence；andinsorrysportsometimes，IamtheirPrincessortheirQueen。
’Manypeoplelivinghere，asIamforcedtodo，wouldperhapsbeveryhappy，andperhapsIoughttobeso。
Wehaveabeauteousvalley，shelteredfromthecoldofwinterandpowerofthesummersun，untroubledalsobythestormsandmiststhatveilthemountains；althoughImustacknowledgethatitisapttoraintoooften。
Thegrassmoreoverissofresh，andthebrooksobrightandlively，andflowersofsomanyhuescomeafteroneanotherthatnooneneedbedull，ifonlyleftalonewiththem。
’Andsointheearlydaysperhaps，whenmorningbreathesaroundme，andthesunisgoingupward，andlightisplayingeverywhere，Iamnotsofarbesidethemallastoliveinshadow。Butwhentheeveninggathersdown，andtheskyisspreadwithsadness，andthedayhasspentitself；thenacloudoflonelytroublefalls，likenight，uponme。IcannotseethethingsIquestforofaworldbeyondme；Icannotjointhepeaceandquietofthedepthaboveme；neitherhaveIanypleasureinthebrightnessofthestars。
’WhatIwanttoknowissomethingnoneofthemcantellme——whatamI，andwhysethere，andwhenshallIbewiththem？Iseethatyouaresurprisedalittleatthismycuriosity。Perhapssuchquestionsneverspringinanywholesomespirit。Buttheyareinthedepthsofmine，andIcannotbequitofthem。
’Meantime，allaroundmeisviolenceandrobbery，coarsedelightandsavagepain，recklessjokeandhopelessdeath。IsitanywonderthatIcannotsinkwiththese，thatIcannotsoforgetmysoul，astolivethelifeofbrutes，anddiethedeathmorehorriblebecauseitdreamsofwaking？Thereisnonetoleadmeforward，thereisnonetoteachmeright；youngasI
am，Ilivebeneathacursethatlastsforever。’
HereLornabrokedownforawhile，andcriedsoverypiteously，thatdoubtingofmyknowledge，andofanypowertocomfort，Ididmybesttoholdmypeace，andtriedtolookverycheerful。Thenthinkingthatmightbebadmanners，Iwenttowipehereyesforher。
’MasterRidd，’shebeganagain，’Iambothashamedandvexedatmyownchildishfolly。Butyou，whohaveamother，whothinksyousaysomuchofyou，andsisters，andaquiethome；youcannottellitisnotlikelywhatalonelynatureis。Howitleapsinmirthsometimes，withonlyheaventouchingit；andhowitfallsawaydesponding，whenthedrearyweightcreepson。
’ItdoesnothappenmanytimesthatIgivewaylikethis；moreshamenowtodoso，whenIoughttoentertainyou。SometimesIamsofullofanger，thatI
darenottrusttospeech，atthingstheycannothidefromme；andperhapsyouwouldbemuchsurprisedthatrecklessmenwouldcaresomuchtoeludeayounggirl’sknowledge。TheyusedtoboasttoAuntSabinaofpillageandofcruelty，onpurposetoenrageher；buttheyneverboasttome。Itevenmakesmesmilesometimestoseehowawkwardlytheycomeandofferfortemptationtomeshiningpackets，halfconcealed，ofornamentsandfinery，ofrings，orchains，orjewels，latelybelongingtootherpeople。
’ButwhenItrytosearchthepast，togetasenseofwhatbefellmeeremyownperceptionformed；tofeelbackforthelinesofchildhood，asatraceofgossamer，thenIonlyknowthatnoughtliveslongerthanGodwillsit。Somayaftersingoby，forwearechildrenalways，astheCounsellorhastoldme；somaywe，beyondtheclouds，seekthisinfancyoflife，andneverfinditsmemory。
’ButIamtalkingnowofthingswhichnevercomeacrossmewhenanyworkistoward。Itmighthavebeenagoodthingformetohavehadafathertobeattheserovingsoutofme；oramothertomakeahome，andteachmehowtomanageit。For，beingleftwithnone——Ithink；andnothingevercomesofit。Nothing，Imean，whichIcangraspandhavewithanysurety；nothingbutfaintimages，andwonderment，andwandering。Butoften，whenIamneithersearchingbackintoremembrance，noraskingofmyparents，butoccupiedbytrifles，somethinglikeasign，ormessage，oratokenofsomemeaning，seemstoglanceuponme。Whetherfromtherustlingwind，orsoundofdistantmusic，orthesingingofabird，likethesunonsnowitstrikesmewithapainofpleasure。