OurfriendDobbinwasoneofthem。ItwashewhobroughtherbacktoEnglandandtohermother’shouse；
whenMrs。O’Dowd，receivingaperemptorysummonsfromherColonel，hadbeenforcedtoquitherpatient。
ToseeDobbinholdingtheinfant，andtohearAmelia’slaughoftriumphasshewatchedhim，wouldhavedoneanymangoodwhohadasenseofhumour。Williamwasthegodfatherofthechild，andexertedhisingenuityinthepurchaseofcups，spoons，pap-boats，andcoralsforthislittleChristian。
Howhismothernursedhim，anddressedhim，andliveduponhim；howshedroveawayallnurses，andwouldscarceallowanyhandbutherowntotouchhim；
howsheconsideredthatthegreatestfavourshecouldconferuponhisgodfather，MajorDobbin，wastoallowtheMajoroccasionallytodandlehim，neednotbetoldhere。Thischildwasherbeing。Herexistencewasamaternalcaress。Sheenvelopedthefeebleandunconsciouscreaturewithloveandworship。Itwasherlifewhichthebabydrankinfromherbosom。Ofnights，andwhenalone，shehadstealthyandintenserapturesofmotherlylove，suchasGod’smarvellouscarehasawardedtothefemaleinstinct——joyshowfarhigherandlowerthanreason——blindbeautifuldevotionswhichonlywomen’sheartsknow。ItwasWilliamDobbin’stasktomuseuponthesemovementsofAmelia’s，andtowatchherheart；andifhislovemadehimdivinealmostallthefeelingswhichagitatedit，alas！hecouldseewithafatalperspicuitythattherewasnoplacethereforhim。Andso，gently，heborehisfate，knowingit，andcontenttobearit。
IsupposeAmelia’sfatherandmothersawthroughtheintentionsoftheMajor，andwerenotill-disposedtoencouragehim；forDobbinvisitedtheirhousedaily，andstayedforhourswiththem，orwithAmelia，orwiththehonestlandlord，Mr。Clapp，andhisfamily。Hebrought，ononepretextoranother，presentstoeverybody，andalmosteveryday；andwent，withthelandlord’slittlegirl，whowasratherafavouritewithAmelia，bythenameofMajorSugarplums。ItwasthislittlechildwhocommonlyactedasmistressoftheceremoniestointroducehimtoMrs。Osborne。ShelaughedonedaywhenMajorSugarplums’
cabdroveuptoFulham，andhedescendedfromit，bringingoutawoodenhorse，adrum，atrumpet，andotherwarliketoys，forlittleGeorgy，whowasscarcelysixmonthsold，andforwhomthearticlesinquestionwereentirelypremature。
Thechildwasasleep。”Hush。”saidAmelia，annoyed，perhaps，atthecreakingoftheMajor’sboots；andsheheldoutherhand；smilingbecauseWilliamcouldnottakeituntilhehadridhimselfofhiscargooftoys。”Godownstairs，littleMary。”saidhepresentlytothechild。”IwanttospeaktoMrs。Osborne。”Shelookedupratherastonished，andlaiddowntheinfantonitsbed。
“Iamcometosaygood-bye，Amelia。”saidhe，takingherslenderlittlewhitehandgently。
“Good-bye？andwhereareyougoing？”shesaid，withasmile。
“Sendtheletterstotheagents。”hesaid；“theywillforwardthem；foryouwillwritetome，won’tyou？I
shallbeawayalongtime。”
“I’llwritetoyouaboutGeorgy。”shesaid。”Dear’William，howgoodyouhavebeentohimandtome。Lookathim。Isn’thelikeanangel？”
Thelittlepinkhandsofthechildclosedmechanicallyroundthehonestsoldier’sfinger，andAmelialookedupinhisfacewithbrightmaternalpleasure。Thecruellestlookscouldnothavewoundedhimmorethanthatglanceofhopelesskindness。Hebentoverthechildandmother。
Hecouldnotspeakforamoment。AnditwasonlywithallhisstrengththathecouldforcehimselftosayaGodblessyou。”Godblessyou。”saidAmelia，andheldupherfaceandkissedhim。
“Hush！Don’twakeGeorgy！”sheadded，asWilliamDobbinwenttothedoorwithheavysteps。Shedidnothearthenoiseofhiscab-wheelsashedroveaway：shewaslookingatthechild，whowaslaughinginhissleep。
HowtoLiveWellonNothingaYearIsupposethereisnomaninthisVanityFairofourssolittleobservantasnottothinksometimesabouttheworldlyaffairsofhisacquaintances，orsoextremelycharitableasnottowonderhowhisneighbourJones，orhisneighbourSmith，canmakebothendsmeetattheendoftheyear。Withtheutmostregardforthefamily，forinstanceforIdinewiththemtwiceorthriceintheseason，IcannotbutownthattheappearanceoftheJenkinsesinthepark，inthelargebarouchewiththegrenadier-footmen，willsurpriseandmystifymetomydyingday：forthoughIknowtheequipageisonlyjobbed，andalltheJenkinspeopleareonboardwages，yetthosethreemenandthecarriagemustrepresentanexpenseofsixhundredayearattheveryleast——andthentherearethesplendiddinners，thetwoboysatEton，theprizegovernessandmastersforthegirls，thetripabroad，ortoEastbourneorWorthing，intheautumn，theannualballwithasupperfromGunter’swho，bytheway，suppliesmostofthefirst-ratedinnerswhichJ。gives，asIknowverywell，havingbeeninvitedtooneofthemtofillavacantplace，whenIsawatoncethattheserepastsareverysuperiortothecommonrunofentertainmentsforwhichthehumblersortofJ。’sacquaintancesgetcards——who，Isay，withthemostgood-naturedfeelingsintheworld，canhelpwonderinghowtheJenkinsesmakeoutmatters？WhatisJenkins？Weallknow——CommissioneroftheTapeandSealingWaxOffice，with1200poundsayearforasalary。Hadhiswifeaprivatefortune？Pooh！——MissFlint——oneofelevenchildrenofasmallsquireinBuckinghamshire。AllsheevergetsfromherfamilyisaturkeyatChristmas，inexchangeforwhichshehastoboardtwoorthreeofhersistersintheoffseason，andlodgeandfeedherbrotherswhentheycometotown。HowdoesJenkinsbalancehisincome？I
say，aseveryfriendofhismustsay，Howisitthathehasnotbeenoutlawedlongsince，andthatheevercamebackashedidtothesurpriseofeverybodylastyearfromBoulogne？
“I“ishereintroducedtopersonifytheworldingeneral——theMrs。Grundyofeachrespectedreader’sprivatecircle——everyoneofwhomcanpointtosomefamiliesofhisacquaintancewholivenobodyknowshow。Manyaglassofwinehaveweallofusdrunk，Ihaveverylittledoubt，hob-and-nobbingwiththehospitablegiverandwonderinghowthedeucehepaidforit。
SomethreeorfouryearsafterhisstayinParis，whenRawdonCrawleyandhiswifewereestablishedinaverysmallcomfortablehouseinCurzonStreet，MayFair，therewasscarcelyoneofthenumerousfriendswhomtheyentertainedatdinnerthatdidnotasktheabovequestionregardingthem。Thenovelist，ithasbeensaidbefore，knowseverything，andasIaminasituationtobeabletotellthepublichowCrawleyandhiswifelivedwithoutanyincome，mayIentreatthepublicnewspaperswhichareinthehabitofextractingportionsofthevariousperiodicalworksnowpublishednottoreprintthefollowingexactnarrativeandcalculations——ofwhichIought，asthediscovererandatsomeexpense，too，tohavethebenefit？Myson，Iwouldsay，wereIblessedwithachild——youmaybydeepinquiryandconstantintercoursewithhimlearnhowamanlivescomfortablyonnothingayear。Butitisbestnottobeintimatewithgentlemenofthisprofessionandtotakethecalculationsatsecondhand，asyoudologarithms，fortoworkthemyourself，dependuponit，willcostyousomethingconsiderable。
Onnothingperannumthen，andduringacourseofsometwoorthreeyears，ofwhichwecanaffordtogivebutaverybriefhistory，CrawleyandhiswifelivedveryhappilyandcomfortablyatParis。ItwasinthisperiodthathequittedtheGuardsandsoldoutofthearmy。Whenwefindhimagain，hismustachiosandthetitleofColonelonhiscardaretheonlyrelicsofhismilitaryprofession。
IthasbeenmentionedthatRebecca，soonafterherarrivalinParis，tookaverysmartandleadingpositioninthesocietyofthatcapital，andwaswelcomedatsomeofthemostdistinguishedhousesoftherestoredFrenchnobility。TheEnglishmenoffashioninPariscourtedher，too，tothedisgustoftheladiestheirwives，whocouldnotbeartheparvenue。ForsomemonthsthesalonsoftheFaubourgSt。Germain，inwhichherplacewassecured，andthesplendoursofthenewCourt，whereshewasreceivedwithmuchdistinction，delightedandperhapsalittleintoxicatedMrs。Crawley，whomayhavebeendisposedduringthisperiodofelationtoslightthepeople——honestyoungmilitarymenmostly——whoformedherhusband’schiefsociety。
ButtheColonelyawnedsadlyamongtheDuchessesandgreatladiesoftheCourt。Theoldwomenwhoplayedecartemadesuchanoiseaboutafive-francpiecethatitwasnotworthColonelCrawley’swhiletositdownatacard-table。Thewitoftheirconversationhecouldnotappreciate，beingignorantoftheirlanguage。
Andwhatgoodcouldhiswifeget，heurged，bymakingcurtsieseverynighttoawholecircleofPrincesses？HeleftRebeccapresentlytofrequentthesepartiesalone，resuminghisownsimplepursuitsandamusementsamongsttheamiablefriendsofhisownchoice。
Thetruthis，whenwesayofagentlemanthatheliveselegantlyonnothingayear，weusetheword“nothing“tosignifysomethingunknown；meaning，simply，thatwedon’tknowhowthegentlemaninquestiondefraystheexpensesofhisestablishment。Now，ourfriendtheColonelhadagreataptitudeforallgamesofchance：
andexercisinghimself，ashecontinuallydid，withthecards，thedice-box，orthecue，itisnaturaltosupposethatheattainedamuchgreaterskillintheuseofthesearticlesthanmencanpossesswhoonlyoccasionallyhandlethem。Touseacueatbilliardswellislikeusingapencil，oraGermanflute，orasmall-sword——youcannotmasteranyoneoftheseimplementsatfirst，anditisonlybyrepeatedstudyandperseverance，joinedtoanaturaltaste，thatamancanexcelinthehandlingofeither。
NowCrawley，frombeingonlyabrilliantamateur，hadgrowntobeaconsummatemasterofbilliards。LikeagreatGeneral，hisgeniususedtorisewiththedanger，andwhentheluckhadbeenunfavourabletohimforawholegame，andthebetswereconsequentlyagainsthim，hewould，withconsummateskillandboldness，makesomeprodigioushitswhichwouldrestorethebattle，andcomeinavictorattheend，totheastonishmentofeverybody——ofeverybody，thatis，whowasastrangertohisplay。Thosewhowereaccustomedtoseeitwerecautioushowtheystakedtheirmoneyagainstamanofsuchsuddenresourcesandbrilliantandoverpoweringskill。
Atgamesofcardshewasequallyskilful；forthoughhewouldconstantlylosemoneyatthecommencementofanevening，playingsocarelesslyandmakingsuchblunders，thatnewcomerswereofteninclinedtothinkmeanlyofhistalent；yetwhenrousedtoactionandawakenedtocautionbyrepeatedsmalllosses，itwasremarkedthatCrawley’splaybecamequitedifferent，andthathewasprettysureofbeatinghisenemythoroughlybeforethenightwasover。Indeed，veryfewmencouldsaythattheyeverhadthebetterofhim。
Hissuccessesweresorepeatedthatnowondertheenviousandthevanquishedspokesometimeswithbitternessregardingthem。AndastheFrenchsayoftheDukeofWellington，whoneversufferedadefeat，thatonlyanastonishingseriesofluckyaccidentsenabledhimtobeaninvariablewinner；yeteventheyallowthathecheatedatWaterloo，andwasenabledtowinthelastgreattrick：soitwashintedatheadquartersinEnglandthatsomefoulplaymusthavetakenplaceinordertoaccountforthecontinuoussuccessesofColonelCrawley。
ThoughFrascati’sandtheSalonwereopenatthattimeinParis，themaniaforplaywassowidelyspreadthatthepublicgambling-roomsdidnotsufficeforthegeneralardour，andgamblingwentoninprivatehousesasmuchasiftherehadbeennopublicmeansforgratifyingthepassion。AtCrawley’scharminglittlereunionsofaneveningthisfatalamusementcommonlywaspractised——
muchtogood-naturedlittleMrs。Crawley’sannoyance。
Shespokeaboutherhusband’spassionfordicewiththedeepestgrief；shebewailedittoeverybodywhocametoherhouse。Shebesoughttheyoungfellowsnever，nevertotouchabox；andwhenyoungGreen，oftheRifles，lostaveryconsiderablesumofmoney，Rebeccapassedawholenightintears，astheservanttoldtheunfortunateyounggentleman，andactuallywentonherkneestoherhusbandtobeseechhimtoremitthedebt，andburntheacknowledgement。Howcouldhe？HehadlostjustasmuchhimselftoBlackstoneoftheHussars，andCountPunteroftheHanoverianCavalry。Greenmighthaveanydecenttime；butpay？——ofcoursehemustpay；totalkofburningIOU’swaschild’splay。
Otherofficers，chieflyyoung——fortheyoungfellowsgatheredroundMrs。Crawley——camefromherpartieswithlongfaces，havingdroppedmoreorlessmoneyatherfatalcard-tables。Herhousebegantohaveanunfortunatereputation。Theoldhandswarnedthelessexperiencedoftheirdanger。ColonelO’Dowd，ofthe——thregiment，oneofthoseoccupyinginParis，warnedLieutenantSpooneyofthatcorps。AloudandviolentfracastookplacebetweentheinfantryColonelandhislady，whowerediningattheCafedeParis，andColonelandMrs。Crawley；whowerealsotakingtheirmealthere。