CAPTMPerfectly“Shelter-pitfortheOff’cer’scharger。”astheysayintheLine。
CAPTGAndIhaveeverythingtomyhandtomakeitsoI’msickofthestrainandtheworryfortheirsakesouthere；andthereisn’tasinglerealdifficultytopreventmydroppingitaltogether。
It’llonlycostme-Jack，Ihopeyou’llneverknowtheshamethatI’vebeengoingthroughforthepastsixmonths。
CAPTMHoldonthere！Idon’twishtohetoldEverymanhashismoodsandtensessometimes。
CAPTGLaughingbrtterly。Hashe？Whatdoyoucallcraningovertoseewhereyournear-forelands？
CAPTMInmycaseitmeansthatIhavebeenontheConsiderableBend，andhavecometoparadewithaHeadandaHandItpassesinthreestrides。
CAPTGLoweringvoice。Itneverpassesw’thme，JackI’malwaysthinkingaboutitPhilGadsbyfunkingafallonparade！
Sweetpicture，isn’tit！Drawitforme。
CAPTMGravely。Heavenforbid！Amanlikeyoucan’tbeasbadasthatAfallisnonicething，butonenevergivesitathought。
CAPTGDoesn’tone？Waittillyou’vegotawifeandayoungsterofyourown，andthenyou’llknowhowtheroarofthesquadronbehindyouturnsyoucoldalluptheback。
CAPTMAside。AndthismanledatAmdheranafterBagalDeasinwentunder，andwewereallmixeduptogether，andhecameoutofthesnowdrippinglikeabutcherAloud。Skittles！
Themencanalwaysopenout，andyoucanalwayspickyourwaymoreorlessWehaven’tthedusttobotherus，asthemenhave，andwhoeverheardofahorsesteppingonaman？
CAPTGNever-aslongashecanseeButdidtheyopenoutforpoorErrington？
CAPTMOh，thisischildish！
CAPTGIknowitis，worsethanthatIdon’tcareYou’veriddenVanLooIshethesortofbrutetopickhisway-’speciallywhenwe’recomingupincolumnoftroopwithanypaceon？
CAPTMOnceinaBlueMoondowegallopincolumnoftroop，andthenonlytosavetimeAren’tthreelengthsenoughforyou？
CAPTGYes-quiteenoughTheyjustallowforthefulldevelopmentofthesmashI’mtalkinglikeacur，Iknow：butItellyouthat，forthepastthreemonths，I’vefelteveryhoofofthesquadroninthesmallofmybackeverytimethatI’veled。
CAPTMBut，Gaddy，thisisawful！
CAPTGIsn’titlovely？Isn’titroyal？ACaptainofthePinkHussarswateringuphischargerbeforeparadeliketheblastedboozingColonelofaBlackRegiment！
CAPTMYouneverdid！
CAPTGOnceOnlyHesquelchedlikeamussuck，andtheTroop-Sergeant-MajorcockedhiseyeatmeYouknowoldHaffy’seyeIwasafraidtodoitagain。
CAPTMIshouldthinksoThatwasthebestwaytoruptureoldVanLoo’stummy，andmakehimcrumpleyouupYouknewthat。
CAPTGIdidn’tcareIttooktheedgeoffhim。
CAPTM“Tooktheedgeoffhim“？Gaddy，you-you-youmustn’t，youknow！Thinkofthemen。
CAPTGThat’sanotherthingIamafraidofD’yous’posetheyknow？
CAPTMLet’shopenot；butthey’redeadlyquicktospotskirm-littlethingsofthatkindSeehere，oldman，sendtheWifeHomeforthehotweatherandcometoKashmirwithmeWe’llstartaboatontheDalorcrosstheRhotang-shootibexorloaf-
whichyoupleaseOnlycome！You’reabitoffyouroatsandyou’retalkingnonsenseLookattheColonel-swag-belliedrascalthatheisHehasawifeandnoendofabow-windowofhisownCananyoneofusrideroundhim-chalkstonesandall？Ican’t，andIthinkI
canshoveacrockalongabit。
CAPTGSomemenaredifferentIhaven’tanynerveLordhelpme，Ihaven’tthenerve！I’vetakenupaholeandahalftogetmykneeswellunderthewalletsIcan’thelpitI’msoafraidofanythinghappeningtomeOnmysoul，Ioughttobebrokeinfrontofthesquadron，forcowardice。
CAPTMUglyword，thatIshouldneverhavethecouragetoownup。
CAPTGImeanttolieaboutmyreasonswhenIbegan，but-I’vegotoutofthehabitoflyingtoyou，oldmanJack，youwon’t？-ButIknowyouwon’t。
CAPTMOfcoursenotHalfaloud。ThePinksarepayingdearlyfortheirPride。
CAPTGEb！What-at？
CAPTMDon’tyouknow？ThemenhavecalledMrsGadsbythePrideofthePinkHussarseversinceshecametous。
CAPTG’Tisn’therfaultDon’tthinkthatIt’sallmine。
CAPTMWhatdoesshesay？
CAPTGIhaven’texactlyputitbeforeherShe’sthebestlittlewomanintheworld，Jack，andallthat-butshewouldn’tcounselamantosticktohiscallingifitcamebetweenhimandherAtleast，Ithink-
CAPTMNevermindDon’ttellherwhatyoutoldmeGoonthePeerageandLanded-Gentrytack。
CAPTGShe’dseethroughitShe’sfivetimesclevererthanIam。
CAPTMAside。Thenshe’llacceptthesacrificeandthinkalittlebitworseofhimfortherestofherdays。
CAPTGAbsentl’y。Isay，doyoudespiseme？
CAPTM’QueerwayofputtingitHaveyoueverbeenaskedthatquestion？ThinkaminuteWhatanswerusedyoutogive？
CAPTGSobadasthat？I’mnotentitledtoexpectanythingmore，butit’sabithardwhenone’sbestfriendturnsroundand-
CAPTMSo！havefoundButyouwillhaveconsolations-BailiffsandDrainsandLiquidManureandthePrimroseLeague，and，perhaps，ifyou’relucky，theColonelcyofaYeomanryCav-al-ryRegiment-alluniformandnoriding，IbelieveHowoldareyou？
CAPTGThirty-threeIknowit’s-
CAPTMAtfortyyou’llbeafoolofaJPlandlordAtfiftyyou’llownabath-chair，andTheBrigadier，ifhetakesafteryou，willbeflutteringthedovecotesof-what’stheparticulardunghillyou’regoingto？Also，MrsGadsbywillbefat。
CAPTGLimply。Thisisrathermorethanajoke。
CAPTMD’youthinkso？Isn’tcuttingtheServiceajoke？ItgenerallytakesamanfiftyyearstoarriveatitYou’requiteright，thoughItismorethanajokeYou’vemanageditinthirty-three。
CAPTGDon’tmakemefeelworsethanIdoWillitsatisfyyouifIownthatIamashirker，askrim-shanker，andacoward？
CAPTMItwil！not，becauseI’mtheonlymanintheworldwhocantalktoyoulikethiswithoutbeingknockeddownYoumustn’ttakeallthatI’vesaidtoheartinthiswayIonlyspoke-alotofitatleast-outofpureselfishness，because，because-Oh，damnitall，oldman，-Idon’tknowwhatIshalldowithoutyouOfcourse，you’vegotthemoneyandtheplaceandallthat-andtherearetwoverygoodreasonswhyyoushouldtakecareofyourself。
CAPTG’Doesn’tmakeitanysweeterI’mbackingout-IknowI
amIalwayshadasoftdropinmesomewhere-andIdaren’triskanydangertothem。
CAPTMWhyintheworldshouldyou？You’reboundtothinkofyourfamily-boundtothinkEr-hmmIfIwasn’tayoungersonI’dgotoo-beshotifIwouldn’tI！
CAPTGThankyou，JackIt’sakindlie，butit’stheblackestyou’vetoldforsometimeIknowwhatI’mdoing，andI’mgoingintoitwithmyeyesopenOldman，Ican’thelpitWhatwouldyoudoifyouwereinmyplace？
CAPTMAside。’Couldn’tconceiveanywomangettingpermanentlybetweenmeandtheRegimentAloud。’Can’tsay。
’VerylikelyIshoulddonobetterI’msorryforyou-awf’lysorry-but“ifthem’syoursentiments。”Ibelieve，Ireallydo，thatyouareactingwisely。
CAPTGDoyou？IhopeyoudoInawhisper。Jack，beverysureofyourselfbeforeyoumarryI’manungratefulruffiantosaythis，butmarriage-evenasgoodamarriageasminehasbeen-
hampersaman’swork，itcrippleshissword-arm，andoh，itplaysHellwithhisnotionsofdutySometimes-goodandsweetassheis-sometimesIcouldwishthatIhadkeptmyfreedom-No，Idon’tmeanthatexactly。
MRSGComingdownveranda。Whatareyouwaggingyourheadove；Pip？
CAPTMTurningquickly。Me，asusualTheoldsermonYourhusbandisrecommendingmetogetmarried’Neversawsuchaone-ideaedman。
MRSGWell，whydon’tyou？Idaresayyouwouldmakesomewomanveryhappy。
CAPTGThere’stheLawandtheProphets，JackNevermindtheRegimentMakeawomanhappyAside。OLord！
CAPTMWe’llseeImustbeofftomakeaTroopCookdesperatelyunhappyIwon’thavethewilyHussarfedonGovernmentBullockTrainshinbones-Hastily。Surelyblackantscan’tbegoodforTheBrigadierHe’spickingemoffthemattingandeating’emHere，SenorComandanteDonGrubbynuse，comeandtalktomeLiftsGJUNIORinhisarms。’Wantmywatch？
Youwon’tbeabletoputitintoyourmouth，butyoucantryG。
JUNIORdropswatch，breakingdialandhands。
MRSGOh，CaptainMafflin，Iamsosorry！Jack，youbad，badlittlevillainAhhh！
CAPTMIt’snottheleastconsequence，IassureyouHe’dtreattheworldinthesamewayifhecouldgetitintohishands。
Everything’smadetobeplayed，withandbroken，isn’tit，young’un？
*
MRSGMafflindidn’tatalllikehiswatchbeingbroken，thoughhewastoopolitetosaysoItwasentirelyhisfaultforgivingittothechildDemlittlepudsarewerry，werryfeeble，aren’tdey，byJack-in-de-box？ToG。Whatdidhewanttoseeyoufor？
CAPTGRegimentalshopasusual。
MRSGTheRegiment！AlwaystheRegimentOnmyword，I
sometimesfeeljealousofMafflin。
CAPTGWearily。PooroldJack？Idon’tthinkyouneedIsn’tittimeforTheButchatohavehisnap？Bringachairouthere，dear。
I’vegotsomethingtotalkoverwithyou。
ANDTHISISTHEENDOFTHESTORYOFTHEGADSBYS
VOLUMEVIIIfromMINEOWNPEOPLE
BimiNamgayDoolaTheRecrudescenceOfImrayMotiGuj-MutineerBIMI
THEorang-outanginthebigironcagelashedtothesheep-penbeganthediscussionThenightwasstiflinglyhot，andasHansBreitmannandIpassedhim，draggingourbeddingtothefore-peakofthesteamer，herousedhimselfandchatteredobscenelyHehadbeencaughtsomewhereintheMalayanArchipelago，andwasgoingtoEnglandtobeexhibitedatashillingaheadForfourdayshehadstruggled，yelled，andwrenchedattheheavyironbarsofhisprisonwithoutceasing，andhadnearlyslainaLascarincautiousenoughtocomewithinreachofthegreathairypaw。
“Itwouldhewellforyou，minefriend，ifyouwasaliddleseasick。”
saidHansBreitmann，pausingbythecage“YouhaftoomuchEgoinyourCosmos。”
Theorang-outang’sarmslidoutnegligentlyfrombetweenthebarsNoonewouldhavebelievedthatitwouldmakeasuddensnake-likerushattheGerman’sbreastThethinsilkofthesleeping-suittoreout：Hanssteppedbackunconcernedly，topluckabananafromabunchhangingclosetooneoftheboats。
“ToomuchEgo。”saidbe，peelingthefruitandofferingittothecageddevil，whowasrendingthesilktotatters。
Thenwelaidoutourbeddinginthebows，amongthesleepingLascars，tocatchanybreezethatthepaceoftheshipmightgiveus。
Theseawaslikesmokyoil。，exceptwhereitturnedtofireunderourforefootandWhirledbackintothedarkinsmearsofdullflameTherewasathunderstormsomemilesaway：wecouldseetheglimmerofthelightningTheship’scow，distressedbytheheatandthesmelloftheape-beastinthecage，lowedunhappilyfromtimetotimeinexactlythesamekeyasthelookoutmanatthebowsansweredthehourlycallfromthebridgeThetramplingtuneoftheengineswasverydistinct，andthejarringoftheash-lift，asitwastippedintothesea，hurttheprocessionofhushednoise。
Hanslaydownbymysideandlightedagood-nightcigarThiswasnaturallythebeginningofconversationHeownedavoiceassoothingasthewashofthesea，andstoresofexperiencesasvastastheseaitself；forhisbusinessinlifewastowanderupanddowntheworld，collectingorchidsandwildbeastsandethnologicalspecimensforGermanandAmericandealersIwatchedtheglowingendofhiscigarwaxandwaneinthegloom，asthesentencesroseandfell，tillIwasnearlyasleepTheorang-outang，troubledbysomedreamoftheforestsofhisfreedom，begantoyelllikeasoulinpurgatory，andtowrenchmadlyatthebarsofthecage。
“Ifhewasoutnowderewouldnotbemuchofuslefthereabouts。”
saidHans，lazily“HescreamsgoodSee，now，howIshalltamehimwhenhestopshimself。”