wouldhavemadehimanything！AnythinginthewideworldHecouldhavegonetotheworld’sendIwouldhavehelpedhimImadehim，didn’tI，Polly？Didn’tIcreatethatman？Doesn’theoweeverythingtome？Andtorewardme，justwheneverythingwasnicelyarranged，bythislunacythatspoiledeverything！”
“Veryfewmenunderstandyourdevotionthoroughly。”
“Oh，Polly，don’tlaughatme！IgivemenupfromthishourI
couldhavekilledhimthenandthereWhatrighthadthisman-thisThingIhadpickedoutofhisfilthypaddy-fields-tomakelovetome？”
“Hedidthat，didhe？”
“HedidIdon’trememberhalfhesaid，IwassoangryOh，hutsuchafunnythinghappened！I
can’thelplaughingatitnow，thoughIfeltnearlyreadytocrywithrageHeravedandI
stormed-I’mafraidwemusthavemadeanawfulnoiseinourkalajuggahProtectmycharacter，dear，ifit’salloverSimlabyto-morrow-andthenhebobbedforwardinthemiddleofthisinsanity-Ifirmlybelievetheman’sdemented-andkissedme！”
“Moralsabovereproach。”purredMrsMallowe。
“Sotheywer~sotheyare！ItwasthemostabsurdkissIdon’tbelievehe’deverkissedawomaninhislifebeforeIthrewmyheadback，anditwasasortofslidy，peckingdab，justontheendofthechin-here。”MrsHauksbeetappedhermasculinelittlechinwithherfan“Then，ofcourse，I
wasjuriouslyangry，andtoldhimthathewasnogentleman，andI
wassorryI’devermethim，andsoonHewascrushedsoeasilythatIcouldn’tbeveryangryThenIcameawaystraighttoyou。”
“Wasthisbeforeoraftersupper？”
“Oh！before-oceansbeforeIsn’titperfectlydisgusting？”
“LetmethinkIwithholdjudgmenttillto-morrowMorningbringscounsel。”
ButmorningbroughtonlyaservantwithadaintybouquetofAnnandalerosesforMrsHauksbeetowearatthedanceatViceregalLodgethatnight。
“Hedoesn’tseemtobeverypenitent。”saidMrsMallowe“What’sth，’billet-douxinthecentre？”
MrsHauksbeeopenedtheneatlyfoldednote，-anotheraccomplishmentthatshehadtaughtOtis，-readit，andgroanedtragically。
“Lastwreckofafeebleintellect！Poetry！Isithisown，doyouthink？Oh，thatIeverbuiltmyhopesonsuchamaudlinidiot！”
“NoIt’saquotationfromMrsBrowning，and，inviewofthefactsofthecase，asJacksays，uncommonlywellchosenListen-“’Sweetthouhastrodonaheart，Pass！There’saworldfullofmenAndwomenasfairasthouart，Mustdosuchthingsnowandthefl“’Thouonlyhaststeppedunaware-Malicenotonecanimpute；
Andwhyshouldahearthavebeenthere，Inthewayofafairwoman5foot？’
“Ididn’t-Ididn’t-Ididn’t！“-saidMrsHauksbee，angrily，hereyesfillingwithtears；“therewasnomaliceatal~Oh，it’stoovexatious！”
“You’vemisunderstoodthecompliment。”saidMrsMallowe“Heclearsyoucompletelyand-ahem-1shouldthinkbythis，thathehasclearedcompletelytooMyexperienceofmenisthatwhentheybegintoquotepoetry，theyaregoingtoflitLikeswanssingingbeforetheydie，youknow。”
’Polly，youtakemysorrowsinamostunfeelingway。”
“DoI？”Isitsoterrible？Ifhe’shurtyourvanity，Ishouldsaythatyou’vedoneacertainamountofdamagetohisheart。”
“Oh，younevercantellaboutamansaidMrsHauksbee。
AtthePit’sMouthMensayitwasastolentid~
TheLordthatsentitheknowsall，ButinmineearwillayeabideThemessagethatthebellsletfall，Andawesomebellstheyweretome，Thatinthedarkrang，“Enderby。”-
JeanIngelow。
ONCEuponatimetherewasamanandhisWifeandaTertiumQuid。
Allthreewereunwise，buttheWifewastheunwisestTheManshouldhavelookedafterhisWife，whoshouldhaveavoidedtheTertiumQuid，who，again，shouldhavemarriedawifeofhisown，aftercleanandopenflirtations，towhichnobodycanpossiblyobject，roundJakkoorObservatoryHillWhenyouseeayoungmanwithhisponyinawhitelather，andhishatonthebackofhisheadflyingdown-hillatfifteenmilesanhourtomeetagirlwhowillheproperlysurprisedtomeethim，younaturallyapproveofthatyoungman，andwishhimStaffAppointments，andtakeaninterestinhiswelfare，and，asthepropertimecomes，givethemsugar-tongsorside-saddleiaccordingtoyourmeansandgenerosity。
TheTertiumQuidflewdown-hillonhorseback，butitwastomeettheMan’sWife；andwhenheflewup-hillitwasforthesameend。
TheManwasinthePlains，earningmoneyforhisWifetospendondressesandfour-hundred-rupeebracelets，andinexpensiveluxuriesofthatkindHeworkedveryhard，andsentheraletterorapost-carddailyShealsowrotetohimdaily，andsaidthatshewaslongingforhimtocomeuptoSimlaTheTertiumQuidusedtoleanoverhershoulderandlaughasshewrotethenotesThenthetwowouldridetothePostOfficetogether。
Now，Simlaisastrangeplaceanditscustomsarepeculiar；norisanymanwhohasnotspentatleasttenseasonstherequalifiedtopassjudgmentoncircumstantialevidencewhichisthemostuntrustworthyintheCourtsForthesereasons，andforotherswhichneednotappear，IdeclinetostatepositivelywhethertherewasanythingirretrievablywrongintherelationsbetweentheMan’sWifeandtheTertiumQuidIftherewas，andhereonyoumustformyourownopinion，itwastheMan’sWife’sfaultShewaskittenishinhermanners，wearinggenerallyanairofATTHEPIT’SMOUTh201
“You’vemisunderstoodthecompliment。”saidMrsMallowe“Heclearsyoucompletelyand-ahem-Ishouldthinkbythis，thathehasclearedcompletelytooMyexperienceofmenisthatwhentheybegintoquotepoetry，theyaregoingtoflitLikeswanssing’ngbeforetheydie，youknow。”
’Polly，youtakemysorrowsinamostunfeelingway。”
“DoI？”Isitsoterrible？Ifhe’shurtyourvanity，Ishouldsaythatyou’vedoneacertainamountofdamagetohisheart。”
“Oh，younevercantellaboutaman！”saidMrsHauksbee。
AtthePit’sMouthMensayitwasastolentid~
TheLordthatsentitheknowsall，ButinmineearwillayeabideThemessagethatthebellsletfall，Andawesomebellstheyweretome，Thatinthedarkrang，“Enderby。”-
JeanIngelaw~
ONCEuponatimetherewasamanandhisWifeandaTertiumQuid。
Allthreewereunwise，buttheWifewastheunwisestTheManshouldhavelookedafterhisWife，whoshouldhaveavoidedtheTertiuinQuid，who，again，shouldhavemarriedawifeofhisown，aftercleanandopenflirtations，towhichnobodycanpossiblyobject，roundJakkoorObservatoryHillWhenyouseeayoungmanwithhisponyinawhitelather，andhishatonthebackofhisheadflyingdown-hillatfifteenmilesanhourtomeetagirlwhowillheproperlysurprisedtomeethim，younaturallyapproveofthatyoungman，andwishhimStaffAppointments，andtakeaninterestinhiswelfare，and，asthepropertimecomes，givethemsugar-tongsorside-saddle~accordingtoyourmeansandgenerosity。
TheTertiumQuidflewdown-hillonhorseback，butitwastomeettheMan’sWife；andwhenheflewup-hillitwasforthesameend。
TheManwasinthePlains，earningmoneyforhisWifetospendondressesandfour-hundred-rupeebracelets，andinexpensiveluxuriesofthatkindHeworkedveryhard，andsentheraletterorapost-carddailyShealsowrotetohimdaily，andsaidthatshewaslongingforhimtocomeuptoSimlaTheTertiumQuidusedtoleanoverhershoulderandlaughasshewrotethenotesThenthetwowouldridetothePostOfficetogether。
Now，Simlaisastrangeplaceanditscustomsarepeculiar；norisanymanwhohasnotspentatleasttenseasonstherequalifiedtopassjudgmentoncircumstantialevidencewhichisthemostuntrustworthyintheCourtsForthesereasons，andforotherswhichneednotappear，IdeclinetostatepositivelywhethertherewasanythingirretrievablywrongintherelationsbetweentheMan’sWifeandtheTertiumQuidIftherewas，andhereonyoumustformyourownopinion，itwastheMan’sWife’sfaultShewaskittenishinhermanners，wearinggenerallyanairof201
WORKSOFRUDYARDKIPLING
渙ftandfluffyinnocenceButshewasdeidlilylearnedandevil-instructed；and，nowandagain，whenthemaskdropped，mensawthis，snudueredand~almostdrewbackMenareoccasionallyparucular，andtheleastparticularmenarealwaysthemostexacting。
SimlaiseccentricinitsfashionoftearingfriendshipsCertainattachments~iclihavesetandcrystallizedthroughhalfadozenseasonsacquirealmostthesanctityofthemarriagebond，andarereveredassuchAgain，certainattachmentsequallyold，and，toallappearance，equallyvenerable，neverseemtowinanyrecognizedofficialstatus；whileachance-sprungacquaintancenowtwomonthsborn，stepsintotheplacewhichbyrightbelongstothe~eniorThereisnolawreducibletoprintwhichregulatestheseaffairs。
Somepeoplehaveagjftwhichsecurestheminfiniteteleration，andothershavenotTheMan’sWifehadnotIfshelookedoverthegardenwall，forin-stance，womentaxedherwithstealingtheirhusbandsShecomplainedpatheticallythatshewasnotallowedtochooseherownfriends。
Whensheputupherbigwhitemufftoherlips，andgazedoveritandunderhereyebrowsatyouas~hesaidthisthing，youfeltthatshehadbeeninfamouslymisjudged，andthatalltheotherwomen’sinstinctswereallwrong；whichwasabsurdShewasnotallowedtoowntheTertiumQuidinpeace；andwassostrangelyconstructedthatshewouldnothaveenjoyedpeacehadshebeensopermittedShepreferredsomesemblanceofintriguetocloakevenhermostcornmonpiaceactions。
Afte~twomonthsofriding，firstroundJakko，thenElysium，thenSummerHill，thenObservatoryHill，thepunderJutogh，andlastlyupanddowntheCartRoadasfarastheTaraDevigapinthedusk，shesaidtotheTertiumQuid，’~Frank，peoplesaywearetoomuchtogether，andpeoplearesohorrid。”
TheTertiumQuidpulledhismoustache，andrepliedthathorridpeoplewereunworthyoftheconsiderationoinicepeople。
“Buttheyhavedonemorethantalk-theyhavewritten-writtentomyhubby-I’msureofit。”saidtheMan’sWife，andshepulledaletterfromherhusbandoutofhersaddle-pocketan~gaveittotheTertiumQuid。
Itwasanhonestletter，writtenb~anhonestman，thenstewinginth~Plainsontwohundredrupeesamonthforheallowedhiswifeeighthundre~andfifty，andinasilkbanianandcottontrousersItissaidthat，perhaps，shehadnothoughtoftheunwisdomofallowinghernametobesogenerallycoupledwiththeTertiumQuid’s；thatshewastoomuchofachildtounderstandthedangersofthatsortofthing；thathe，herhusband，wasthelastmanintheworldtointerferejealouslywithherlittleamusementsandinterests，butthatitwouldbebetterwereshetodroptheTertiumQuidquietlyandforherhusband’ssakeTheletterwassweetenedwithmanyprettylittlepetnames，anditamusedtheTertiumQuidconsiderablyHeandShelaughedoverit，sothatyou，fiftyyardsaway，couldseetheirshouldersshakingwhilethehorsesslouchedalongsidebyside。
TheirconversationwasnotworthreportingTheupshotofitwasthat，ATTHEPIT’la，MOUTh203
nextday，noonesawtheMan’sWifeandtheTertiumQuidtogetherTheyhadbothgonedowntotheCemetery，whiob，asarule，isonlyvisitedofficiallybytheinhabitantsofSimla。