第28章
加入书架 A- A+
点击下载App,搜索"Ulysses(尤利西斯)",免费读到尾

  MulveyswasthefirstwhenIwasinbedthatmorningandMrsRubiobroughtitinwiththecoffeeshestoodtherestandingwhenIaskedhertohandmeandIpointingatthemIcouldntthinkofthewordahairpintoopenitwithahhorquilladisobligingoldthinganditstaringherinthefacewithherswitchoffalsehaironherandvainaboutherappearanceuglyasshewasnear80ora100herfaceamassofwrinkleswithallherreligiondomineeringbecauseshenevercouldgetovertheAtlanticfleetcominginhalftheshipsoftheworldandtheUnionJackflyingwithallhercarabinerosbecause4drunkenEnglishsailorstookalltherockfromthemandbecauseIdidntrunintomassoftenenoughinSantaMariatopleaseherwithhershawluponherexceptwhentherewasamarriageonwithallhermiraclesofthesaintsandherblackblessedvirginwiththesilverdressandthesundancing3timesonEasterSundaymorningandwhenthepriestwasgoingbywiththebellbringingthevaticantothedyingblessingherselfforhisMajestadanadmirerhesigneditInearjumpedoutofmyskinIwantedtopickhimupwhenIsawhimfollowingmealongtheCalleRealintheshopwindowthenhetippedmejustinpassingIneverthoughthedwritemakinganappointmentIhaditinsidemypetticoatbodicealldayreadingitupineveryholeandcornerwhilefatherwasupatthedrillinstructingtofindoutbythehandwritingorthelanguageofstampssingingIremembershallIwearawhiteroseandIwantedtoputontheoldstupidclocktonearthetimehewasthefirstmankissedmeundertheMoorishwallmysweetheartwhenaboyitneverenteredmyheadwhatkissingmeanttillheputhistongueinmymouthhismouthwassweetlikeyoungIputmykneeuptohimafewtimestolearnthewaywhatdidItellhimIwasengagedforfuntothesonofaSpanishnoblemannamedDonMigueldelaFloraandhebelievedthatIwastobemarriedtohimin3yearstimetheresmanyatruewordspokeninjestthereisaflowerthatbloomethafewthingsItoldhimtrueaboutmyselfjustforhimtobeimaginingtheSpanishgirlshedidntlikeIsupposeoneofthemwouldnthavehimIgothimexcitedhecrushedalltheflowersonmybosomhebroughtmehecouldntcountthepesetasandtheperragordastillItaughthimCappoquinhecamefromhesaidontheBlackwaterbutitwastooshortthenthedaybeforeheleftMayyesitwasMaywhentheinfantkingofSpainwasbornImalwayslikethatinthespringIdlikeanewfelloweveryyearuponthetiptopundertherockgunnearOHarastowerItoldhimitwasstruckbylightningandallabouttheoldBarbaryapestheysenttoClaphamwithoutatailcareeringallovertheshowoneachothersbackMrsRubiosaidshewasaregularoldrockscorpionrobbingthechickensoutofIncesfarmandthrowstonesatyouifyouwentanearhewaslookingatmeIhadthatwhiteblouseonopenatthefronttoencouragehimasmuchasIcouldwithouttooopenlytheywerejustbeginningtobeplumpIsaidIwastiredwelayoverthefirtreecoveawildplaceIsupposeitmustbethehighestrockinexistencethegalleriesandcasematesandthosefrightfulrocksandSaintMichaelscavewiththeiciclesorwhatevertheycallthemhangingdownandladdersallthemudplotchingmybootsImsurethatsthewaydownthemonkeysgoundertheseatoAfricawhentheydietheshipsoutfarlikechipsthatwastheMaltaboatpassingYestheseaandtheskyyoucoulddowhatyoulikedliethereforeverhecaressedthemoutsidetheylovedoingthatitstheroundnessthereIwasleaningoverhimwithmywhitericestrawhattotakethenewnessoutofittheleftsideofmyfacethebestmyblouseopenforhislastdaytransparentkindofshirthehadIcouldseehischestpinkhewantedtotouchminewithhisforamomentbutIwouldn’tlethimhewasawfullyputoutfirstforfearyouneverknowconsumptionorleavemewithachildembarazadathatoldservantInestoldmethatonedropevenifitgotintoyouatallafterItriedwiththeBananabutIwasafraiditmightbreakandgetlostupinmesomewhereyesbecausetheyoncetooksomethingdownoutofawomanthatwasupthereforyearscoveredwithlimesaltstheyreallmadtogetintherewheretheycomeoutofyoudthinktheycouldnevergetfarenoughupandthentheyredonewithyouinawaytillthenexttimeyesbecausetheresawonderfulfeelingthereallthetimesotenderhowdidwefinishitoffyesOyesIpulledhimoffintomyhandkerchiefpretendingnottobeexcitedbutIopenedmylegsIwouldntlethimtouchmeinsidemypetticoatIhadaskirtopeningupthesideItorturedthelifeoutofhimfirstticklinghimIlovedrousingthatdoginthehotelrrrsssstawokwokawokhiseyesshutandabirdflyingbelowushewasshyallthesameIlikedhimlikethatmorningImadehimblushalittlewhenIgotoverhimthatwaywhenIunbuttonedhimandtookhisoutanddrewbacktheskinithadakindofeyeinittheyreallButtonsmendownthemiddleonthewrongsideofthemMollydarlinghecalledmewhatwashisnameJackJoeHarryMulveywasityesIthinkalieutenanthewasratherfairhehadalaughingkindofavoicesoIwentaroundtothewhatyoucalliteverythingwaswhatyoucallitmoustachehadhehesaidhedcomebackLorditsjustlikeyesterdaytomeandifIwasmarriedheddoittomeandIpromisedhimyesfaithfullyIdlethimblockmenowflyingperhapshesdeadorkilledoraCaptainoradmiralitsnearly20yearsifIsaidfirtreecovehewouldifhecameupbehindmeandputhishandsovermyeyestoguesswhoImightrecognisehimhesyoungstillabout40perhapshesmarriedsomegirlontheblackwaterandisquitechangedtheyalldotheyhaventhalfthecharacterawomanhasshelittleknowswhatIdidwithherbelovedhusbandbeforeheeverdreamtofherinbroaddaylighttoointhesightofthewholeworldyoumightsaytheycouldhaveputanarticleaboutitintheChronicleIwasabitwildafterwhenIblewouttheoldbagthebiscuitswereinfromBenadyBrosandexplodeditLordwhatabangallthewoodcocksandpigeonsscreamingcomingbackthesamewaythatwewentovermidd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ppositeusedtobetherethewholetimewatchingwiththelightsoutinthesummerandIinmyskinhoppingaroundIusedtolovemyselfthenstrippedatthewashstanddabbingandcreamingonlywhenitcametothechamberperformanceIputoutthelighttoosothentherewere2ofusGoodbyetomysleepforthisnightanyhowIhopehesnotgoingtogetinwiththosemedicalsleadinghimastraytoimaginehesyoungagaincominginat4inthemorningitmustbeifnotmorestillhehadthemannersnottowakemewhatdotheyfindtogabberaboutallnightsquanderingmoneyandgettingdrunkeranddrunkercouldnttheydrinkwaterthenhestartsgivingushisordersforeggsandteaFindonhaddyandhotbutteredtoastIsupposewellhavehimsittinguplikethekingofthecountrypumpingthewrongendofthespoonupanddowninhiseggwhereverhelearnedthatfromandIlovetohearhimfallingupthestairsofamorningwiththecupsrattlingonthetrayandthenplaywiththecatsherubsupagainstyouforherownsakeIwonderhasshefleasshesasbadasawomanalwayslickingandleckingbutIhatetheirclawsIwonderdotheyseeanythingthatwecantstaringlikethatwhenshesitsatthetopofthestairssolongandlisteningasIwaitalwayswhatarobbertoothatlovelyfreshplaiceIboughtIthinkIllgetabitoffishtomorrowortodayisitFridayyesIwillwithsomeblancmangewithblackcurrantjamlikelongagonotthose2lbpotsofmixedplumandapplefromtheLondonandNewcastleWilliamsandWoodsgoestwiceasfaronlyforthebonesIhatethoseeelscodyesIllgetanicepieceofcodImalwaysgettingenoughfor3forgettinganywayImsickofthateverlastingbutchersmeatfromBuckleysloinchopsandlegbeefandribsteakandscragofmuttonandcalfsplucktheverynameisenoughorapicnicsupposeweallgave5/-eachandorlethimpayandinvitesomeotherwomanforhimwhoMrsFleminganddriveouttothefurryglenorthestrawberrybedswedhavehimexaminingallthehorsestoenailsfirstlikehedoeswiththelettersnonotwithBoylanthereyeswithsomecoldvealandhammixedsandwichestherearelittlehousesdownatthebottomofthebanksthereonpurposebutitsashotasblazeshesaysnotabankholidayanyhowIhatethoseruckofMaryAnncoalboxesoutforthedayWhitMondayisacurseddaytoonowonderthatbeebithimbettertheseasidebutIdneveragaininthislifegetintoaboatwithhimafterhimatBraytellingtheboatmenheknewhowtorowifanyoneaskedcouldheridethesteeplechaseforthegoldcuphedsayyesthenitcameontogetroughtheoldthingcrookedingaboutandtheweightalldownmysidetellingmetopulltherightreinsnowpulltheleftandthetideallswampinginfloodsinthroughthroughthebottomandhisoarslippingoutofthestirrupitsamercywewerentalldrownedhecanswimofcoursemenotheresnodangerwhatsoeverkeepyourselfcalminhisflanneltrousersIdliketohavetatteredthemdownoffhimbeforeallthepeopleandgivehimwhatthatonecallsflagellatetillhewasblackandbluedohimallthegoodintheworldonlyforthatlongnosedchapIdontknowwhoheiswiththatotherbeautyBurkeoutoftheCityArmshotelwastherespyingaroundasusualontheslipalwayswherehewasntwantediftherewasarowonyouvomitabetterfacetherewasnolovelostbetweenusthatsIconsolationIwonderwhatkindisthatbookhebroughtmeSweetsofSinbyagentlemanoffashionsomeotherMrdeKockIsupposethepeoplegavehimthatnicknamegoingaboutwithhistubefromonewomantoanotherIcouldntevenchangemynewwhiteshoesallruinedwiththesaltwaterandthehatIhadwiththatfeatherallblowyandtossedonmehowannoyingandprovokingbecausethesmelloftheseaexcitedmeofcoursethesardinesandthebreaminCatalanbayroundthebackoftherocktheywerefineallsilverinthefishermensbasketsoldLuiginearahundredtheysaidcamefromGenoaandthetalloldchapwiththeearringsIdontlikeamanyouhavetoclimbuptogogetatIsupposetheyrealldeadandrottenlongagobesidesIdontlikebeingaloneinthisbigbarracksofaplaceatnightIsupposeIllhavetoputupwithitIneverbroughtabitofsaltinevenwhenwemovedintheconfusionmusicalacademyhewasgoingtomakeonthefirstfloordrawingroomwithabrassplateorBloomsprivatehotelhesuggestedgoandruinhimselfaltogetherthewayhisfatherdiddowninEnnislikeallthethingshetoldfatherhewasgoingtodoandmebutIsawthroughhimtellingmeallthelovelyplaceswecouldgoforthehoneymoonVenicebymoonlightwiththegondolasandthelakeofComohehadapicturecutoutofsomepaperofandmandolinesandlanternsOhowniceIsaidwhateverIlikedhewasgoingtodoimmediatelyifnotsoonerwillyoubemymanwillyoucarrymycanheoughttogetaleathermedalwithaputtyrimforalltheplansheinventsthenleavingusherealldayyouneverknowwhatoldbeggaratthedoorforacrustwithhislongstorymightbeatrampandputhisfootinthewaytopreventmeshuttingitlikethatpictureofthathardenedcriminalhewascalledinLloydsWeeklyNews20yearsinjailthenhecomesoutandmurdersanoldwomanforhermofleyimaginehispoorwifeormotherorwhoeversheissuchafaceyoudrunmilesawayfromIcouldntresteasytillIboltedallthedoorsandwindowstomakesurebutitsworseagainbeinglockeduplikeinaprisonoramadhousetheyoughttobeallshotorthecatofninetailsabigbrutelikethatthatwouldattackapooroldwomantomurderherinherbedIdcutthemoffsoIwouldnotthathedbemuchusestillbetterthannothingthenightIwassureIheardburglarsinthekitchenandhewentdowninhisshirtwithacandleandapokerasifhewaslookingforamouseaswhiteasasheetfrightenedoutofhiswitsmakingasmuchnoiseashepossiblycouldfortheburglarsbenefitthereisntmuchtostealindeedtheLordknowsstillitsthefeelingespeciallynowwithMillyawaysuchanideaforhimtosendthegirldowntheretolearntotakephotographsonaccountofhisgrandfatherinsteadofsendinghertoSkerrysacademywhereshedhavetolearnnotlikemegettingallatschoolonlyheddoathinglikethatallthesameonaccountofmeandBoylanthatswhyhediditImcertainthewayheplotsandplanseverythingoutIcouldntturnroundwithherintheplacelatelyunlessIboltedthedoorfirstgavemethefidgetscominginwithoutknockingfirstwhenIputthechairagainstthedoorjustasIwaswashingmyselftherebelowwiththeglovegetonyournervesthendoingthelogladyalldayputherinaglasscasewithtwoatatimetolookatherifheknewshebrokeoffthehandoffthatlittlegimcrackstatuewithherroughnessandcarelessnessbeforesheleftthatIgotthatlittleItalianboytomendsothatyoucantseethejoinfor2shillingswouldnteventeemthepotatoesforyouofcourseshesrightnottoruinherhandsInoticedhewasalwaystalkingtoherlatelyatthetableexplainingthingsinthepaperandshepretendingtounderstandslyofcoursethatcomesfromhissideofthehouseandhelpingherintohercoatbutiftherewasanythingwrongwithheritsmeshedtellnothimheCantsayIpretendthingscanheImtoohonestasamatteroffactIsupposehethinksImfinishedoutandlaidontheshelfwellImnotnonoranythinglikeitwellseewellseenowsheswellonforflirtingtoowithTomDevanstwosonsimitatingmewhistlingwiththoserompsofMurraygirlscallingforhercanMillycomeoutpleaseshesingreatdemandtopickwhattheycanoutofherroundinNelsonstreetridingHarryDevansbicycleatnightitsaswellhesentherwheresheisshewasjustgettingoutofboundswantingtogoontheskatingrinkandsmokingtheircigarettesthroughtheirnoseIsmeltitoffherdresswhenIwasbitingoffthethreadofthebuttonIsewedontothebottomofherjacketshecouldnthidemuchfrommeItellyouonlyIoughtnttohavestitcheditanditonheritbringsapartingandthelastplumpuddingtoosplitin2halvesseeitcomesoutnomatterwhattheysayhertongueisabittoolongformytasteyourblouseisopentoolowshesaystomethepancallingthekettleblackbottomandIhadtotellherno!tocockherlegsuplikethatonshowonthewindowsillbeforeallthepeoplepassingtheyalllookatherlikemewhenIwasherageofcourseanyoldraglookswellonyouthenagreattouchmenottooinherownwayattheOnlyWayintheTheatreroyaltakeyourfootawayoutofthatIhatepeopletouchingmeafraidofherlifeIdcrushherskirtwiththepleatsalotofthattouchingmustgoonintheatresinthecrushinthedarktheyrealwaystryingtowiggleuptoyouthatfellowinthepitatthepitattheGaietyforBeerbohmTreeinTrilbythelasttimeIllevergotheretobesquashedlikethatforanyTrilbyorherbarebumeverytwominutestippingmethereandlookingawayhesabitdaftIthinkIsawhimaftertryingtogetneartwostylishdressedladiesoutsideSwitzerswindowatthesamelittlegameIrecognisedhimonthemomentthefaceandeverythingbuthedidn’tremembermeandshedidntevenwantmetokissherattheBroadstonegoingawaywellIhopeshellgetsomeonetodanceattendanceonherthewayIdidwhenshewasdownwiththemumpsherglandsswollenwheresthisandwheresthatofcourseshecantfeelanythingdeepyetInevercameproperlytillIwaswhat22orsoitwentintothewrongplacealwaysonlytheusualgirlsnonsenseandgigglingthatConnyConnollywritingtoherinwhiteinkonblackpapersealedwithsealingwaxthoughsheclappedwhenthecurtaincamedownbecausehelookedsohandsomethenwehadMartinHarveyforbreakfastdinnerandsupperIthoughttomyselfafterwardsitmustberealloveifamangivesuphislifeforherthatwayfornothingIsupposetherearefewmenlikethatleftitshardtobelieveinitthoughunlessitreallyhappenedtomethemajorityofthemwithnotaparticleofloveintheirnaturestofindtwopeoplelikethatnowadaysfullupofeachotherthatwouldfeelthesamewayasyoudotheyreusuallyabitfoolishintheheadhisfathermusthavebeenabitqueertogoandpoisonhimselfafterherstillpooroldmanIsupposehefeltlostalwaysmakinglovetomythingstoothefewoldragsIhavewantingtoputherhairupat15mypowdertooonlyruinherskinonhershestimeenoughforthatallherlifeafterofcourseshesrestlessknowingshesprettywithherlipssoredapitytheywontstaythatwayIwastoobuttheresnousegoingtothefairwiththethingansweringmelikeafishwomanwhenIaskedtogoforahalfastoneofpotatoesthedaywemetMrsJoeGallaheratthetrottingmatchesandshepretendednottoseeusinhertrapwithFrierythesolicitorwewerentgrandenoughtillIgaveher2damnfinecracksacrosstheearforherselftakethatnowforansweringmelikethatandthatforyourimpudenceshehadmethatexasperatedofcoursecontradictingIwasbadtemperedtoobecausehowwasittherewasaweedintheteaorIdidntsleepthenightbeforecheeseIatewasitandItoldheroverandoveragainnottoleaveknivescrossedlikethatbecauseshehasnobodytocommandherasshesaidherselfwellifhedoesntcorrectherfaithIwillthatwasthelasttimesheturnedontheteartapIwasjustlikethatmyselftheydarentordermeabouttheplaceitshisfaultofcoursehavingthetwoofusslavinghereinsteadofgettinginawomanlongagoamIevergoingtohaveaproperservantagainofcoursethenshedseehimcomingIdhavetoletherknoworshedrevengeitarenttheyanuisancethatoldMrsFlemingyouhavetobewalkingroundafterherputtingthethingsintoherhandssneezingandfartingintothepotswellofcourseshesoldshecanthelpitagoodjobIfoundthatrottenoldsmellydishcloththatgotlostbehindthedresserIknewtherewassomethingandopenedthewindowtoletoutthesmellbringinginhisfriendstoentertainthemlikethenighthewalkedhomewithadogifyoupleasethatmighthavebeenmadespeciallySimonDedalussonhisfathersuchacriticiserwithhisglassesupwithhistallhatonhimatthecricketmatchandagreatbigholeinhissockonethinglaughingattheotherandhissonthatgotallthoseprizesforwhateverhewonthemintheintermediateimagineclimbingovertherailingsifanybodysawhimthatknewuswonderhedidnttearabigholeinhisgrandfuneraltrousersasiftheonenaturegavewasntenoughforanybodyhawkinghimdownintothedirtyoldkitchennowisherightinhisheadIaskpityitwasn’twashingdaymyoldpairofdrawersmighthavebeenhanginguptooonthelineonexhibitionforallhedevercarewiththeironmouldmarkthestupidoldbundleburnedonthemhemightthinkwassomethingelseandsheneverevenrendereddownthefatItoldherandnowshesgoingsuchasshewasonaccountofherparalysedhusbandgettingworsetheresalwayssomethingwrongwiththemdiseaseortheyhavetogounderanoperationorifitsnotthatitsdrinkandhebeatsherIllhavetohuntaroundagainforsomeoneeverydayIgetuptheressomenewthingonsweetGodsweetGodwellwhenImstretchedoutdeadinmygraveIsupposeIllhavesomepeaceIwanttogetupaminuteifImletwaitOJesuswaityesthatthinghascomeonmeyesnowwouldntthatafflictyouofcourseallthepokingandrootingandploughinghehadupinmenowwhatamItodoFridaySaturdaySundaywouldntthatpesterthesouloutofabodyunlesshelikesitsomemendoGodknowstheresalwayssomethingwrongwithus5daysevery3or4weeksusualmonthlyauctionisntitsimplysickeningthatnightitcameonmelikethattheoneandonlytimewewereinaboxthatMichaelGunngavehimtoseeMrsKendalandherhusbandattheGaietysomethinghedidaboutinsuranceforhimDrimmiesIwasfittobetiedthoughIwouldntgiveinwiththatgentlemanoffashionstaringdownatmewithhisglassesandhimtheothersideofmetalkingaboutSpinozaandhissoulthatsdeadIsupposemillionsofyearsagoIsmiledthebestIcouldallinaswampleaningforwardasifIwasinterestedhavingtosititoutthentothelasttagIwontforgetthatwifeofScarliinahurrysupposedtobeafastplayaboutadulterythatidiotinthegalleryhissingthewomanadulteressheshoutedIsupposehewentandhadawomaninthenextlanerunningroundallthebackwaysaftertomakeupforitIwishhehadwhatIhadthenhedbooIbetthecatitselfisbetteroffthanushavewetoomuchbloodupinusorwhatOpatienceaboveitspouringoutofmeliketheseaanyhowhedidntmakemepregnantasbigasheisIdontwanttoruinthecleansheetsthecleanlinenIworebroughtitontoodamnitdamnitandtheyalwayswanttoseeastainonthebedtoknowyoureavirginforthemallthatstroublingthemtheyresuchfoolstooyoucouldbeawidowordivorced40timesoveradaubofredinkwoulddoorblackberryjuicenothatstoopurplyOJamesyletmeupoutofthispoohsweetsofsinwhoeversuggestedthatbusinessforwomenwhatbetweenclothesandcookingandchildrenthisdamnedoldbedtoojinglinglikethedickensIsupposetheycouldhearusawayovertheothersideoftheparktillIsuggestedtoputthequiltonthefloorwiththepillowundermybottomIwonderisitnicerinthedayIthinkitiseasyIthinkIllcutallthishairoffmetherescaldingmeImightlooklikeayounggirlwouldnthegetthegreatsuckinthenexttimeheturnedupmyclothesonmeIdgiveanythingtoseehisfacewheresthechambergoneeasyIveaholyhorrorofitsbreakingundermeafterthatoldcommodeIwonderwasItooheavysittingonhiskneeImadehimsitontheeasychairpurposelywhenItookoffonlymyblouseandskirtfirstintheotherroomhewassobusywhereheoughtnttobeheneverfeltmeIhopemybreathwassweetafterthosekissingcomfitseasyGodIrememberonetimeIcouldscoutitoutstraightwhistlinglikeamanalmosteasyOLordhownoisyIhopetheyrebubblesonitforawadofmoneyfromsomefellowIllhavetoperfumeitinthemorningdontforgetIbetheneversawabetterpairofthighsthanthatlookhowwhitetheyarethesmoothestplaceisrighttherebetweenthisbitherehowsoftlikeapeacheasyGodIwouldntmindbeingamanandgetuponalovelywomanOLordwhatarowyouremakinglikethejerseylilyeasyOhowthewaterscomedownatLahore

  whoknowsisthereanythingthematterwithmyinsidesorhaveIsomethinggrowinginmegettingthatthinglikethateveryweekwhenwasitlastIWhitMondayyesitsonlyabout3weeksIoughttogotothedoctoronlyitwouldbelikebeforeImarriedhimwhenIhadthatwhitethingcomingfrommeandFloeymademegotothatdryoldstickDrCollinsforwomensdiseasesonPembrokeroadyourvaginahecalleditIsupposethatshowhegotallthegiltmirrorsandcarpetsgettingroundthoserichonesoffStephensgreenrunninguptohimforeverylittlefiddlefaddlehervaginaandhercochinchinatheyvemoneyofcoursesotheyreallrightIwouldntmarryhimnotifhewasthelastmanintheworldbesidestheresomethingqueerabouttheirchildrenalwayssmellingaroundthosefilthybitchesallsidesaskingmeifwhatIdidhadanoffensiveodourwhatdidhewantmetodobuttheonethinggoldmaybewhataquestionifIsmathereditalloverhiswrinklyoldfaceforhimwithallmycomprimentIsupposehedknowthenandcouldyoupassiteasilypasswhatIthoughthewastalkingabouttherockofGibraltarthewayheputsitthatsaveryniceinventiontoobythewayonlyIlikelettingmyselfdownafterintheholeasfarasIcansqueezeandpullthechainthentoflushitnicecoolpinsandneedlesstilltheressomethinginitIsupposeIalwaysusedtoknowbyMillyswhenshewasachildwhethershehadwormsornotstillallthesamepayinghimforthathowmuchisthatdoctoroneguineapleaseandaskingmehadIfrequentomissionswheredothoseoldfellowsgetallthewordstheyhaveomissionswithhisshortsightedeyesonmecockedsidewaysIwouldnttrusthimtoofartogivemechloroformorGodknowswhatelsestillIlikedhimwhenhesatdowntowritethethingoutfrowningsoseverehisnoseintelligentlikethatyoubedamnedyoulyingstrapOanythingnomatterwhoexceptanidiothewascleverenoughtospotthatofcoursethatwasallthinkingofhimandhismadcrazylettersmyPreciousoneeverythingconnectedwithyourgloriousBodyeverythingunderlinedthatcomesfromitisathingofbeautyandofjoyforeversomethinghegotoutofsomenonsensicalbookthathehadmealwaysatmyself4or5timesadaysometimesandIsaidIhadntareyousureOyesIsaidIamquitesureinawaythatshuthimupIknewwhatwascomingnextonlynaturalweaknessitwasheexcitedmeIdontknowhowthefirstnighteverwemetwhenIwaslivinginRehobothterracewestoodstaringatoneanotherforabout10minutesasifwemetsomewhereIsupposeonaccountofmybeingjewesslookingaftermymotherheusedtoamusemethethingshesaidwiththehalfslootheringsmileonhimandalltheDoylessaidhewasgoingtostandforamemberofParliamentOwasntIthebornfooltobelieveallhisblatherabouthomeruleandthelandleaguesendingmethatlongstroolofasongoutoftheHuguenotstosinginFrenchtobemoreclassyObeaupaysdelaTourainethatIneverevensangonceexplainingandrigmarolingaboutreligionandpersecutionhewontletyouenjoyanythingnaturallythenmightheasagreatfavourthevery1stopportunityhegotachanceinBrightonsquarerunningintomybedroompretendingtheinkgotonhishandstowashitoffwiththeAlbionmilkandsulphursoapIusedtouseandthegelatinestillrounditOIlaughedmyselfsickathimthatdayIdbetternotmakeanallnightsittingonthisaffairtheyoughttomakechambersanaturalsizesothatawomancouldsitonitproperlyhekneelsdowntodoitIsupposethereisntinallcreationanothermanwiththehabitshehaslookatthewayhessleepingatthefootofthebedhowcanhewithoutahardbolsteritswellhedoesntkickorhemightknockoutallmyteethbreathingwithhishandonhisnoselikethatIndiangodhetookmetoshowonewetSundayinthemuseuminKildarestreetallyellowinapinaforelyingonhissideonhishandwithhistentoesstickingoutthathesaidwasabiggerreligionthanthejewsandOurLordsbothputtogetheralloverAsiaimitatinghimashesalwaysimitatingeverybodyIsupposeheusedtosleepatthefootofthebedtoowithhisbigsquarefeetupinhiswifesmouthdamnthisstinkingthinganywaywheresthisthosenapkinsareahyesIknowIhopetheoldpressdoesntcreakahIknewitwouldhessleepinghardhadagoodtimesomewherestillshemusthavegivenhimgreatvalueforhismoneyofcoursehehastopayforitfromherOthisnuisanceofathingIhopetheyllhavesomethingbetterforusintheotherworldtyingourselvesupGodhelpusthatsallrightfortonightnowthelumpyoldjinglybedalwaysremindsmeofoldCohenIsupposehescratchedhimselfinitoftenenoughandhethinksfatherboughtitfromLordNapierthatIusedtoadmirewhenIwasalittlegirlbecauseItoldhimeasypianoOIlikemybedGodhereweareasbadaseverafter16yearshowmanyhouseswereweinatallRaymondTerraceandOntarioterraceandLombardstreetandHollesstreetandhegoesaboutwhistlingeverytimewereontherunagainhishuguenotsorthefrogsmarchpretendingtohelpthemenwithour4sticksoffurnitureandthentheCityArmshotelworseandworsesaysWardenDalythatcharmingplaceonthelandingalwayssomebodyinsideprayingthenleavingalltheirstinksafterthemalwaysknowwhowasintherelasteverytimewerejustgettingonrightsomethinghappensorheputshisbigfootinitThomsandHelysandMrCuffesandDrimmieseitherhesgoingtoberunintoprisonoverhisoldlotteryticketsthatwastobealloursalvationsorhegoesandgivesimpudencewellhavehimcominghomewiththesacksoonoutoftheFreemantooliketherestonaccountofthoseSinnerFeinortheFreemasonsthenwellseeifthelittlemanheshowedmedribblingalonginthewetallbyhimselfroundbyCoadyslanewillgivehimmuchconsolationthathesaysissocapableandsincerelyIrishheisindeedjudgingbythesincerityofthetrousersIsawonhimwaittheresGeorgeschurchbellswait3quartersthehourwait2oclockwellthatsanicehourofthenightforhimtobecominghomeattoanybody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dthecitymeetingGodknowswhonightwalkersandpickpocketshispoormotherwouldntlikethatifshewasaliveruininghimselfforlifeperhapsstillitsalovelyhoursosilentIusedtolovecominghomeafterdancestheairofthenighttheyhavefriendstheycantalktowevenoneeitherhewantswhathewontgetoritssomewomanreadytostickherknifeinyouIhatethatinwomennowondertheytreatusthewaytheydoweareadreadfullotofbitchesIsupposeitsallthetroubleswehavemakesussosnappyImnotlikethathecouldeasyhavesleptinthereonthesofaintheotherroomsupposehewasasshyasaboyhebeingsoyounghardly20ofmeinthenextroomhedhaveheardmeonthechamberarrahwhatharmDedalusIwonderitslikethosenamesinGibraltarDelapazDelagraciatheyhadthedevilsqueernamestherefatherVialplanaofSantaMariathatgavemetherosaryRosalesyOReillyintheCallelasSieteRevueltasandPisimboandMrsOpissoinGovernorstreetOwhatanameIdgoanddrownmyselfinthefirstriverifIhadanamelikeherOmyandallthebitsofstreetsParadiserampandBedlamrampandRodgersrampandCrutchettsrampandthedevilsgapstepswellsmallblametomeifIamaharumscarumIknowIamabitIdeclaretoGodIdontfeeladayolderthanthenIwondercouldIgetmytongueroundanyoftheSpanishcomoestaustedmuybiengraciasyustedseeIhaven’tforgottenitallIthoughtIhadonlyforthegrammaranounisthenameofanypersonplaceorthingpityInevertriedtoreadthatnovelcantankerousMrsRubiolentmebyValerawiththequestionsinitallupsidedownthetwowaysIalwaysknewwedgoawayintheendIcantellhimtheSpanishandhetellmetheItalianthenhellseeImnotsoignorantwhatapityhedidntstayImsurethepoorfellowwasdeadtiredandwantedagoodsleepbadlyIcouldhavebroughthiminhisbreakfastinbedwithabitoftoastsolongasIdidntdoitontheknifeforbadluckorifthewomanwasgoingherroundswiththewatercressandsomethingniceandtastythereareafewolivesinthekitchenhemightlikeInevercouldbearthelookoftheminAbrinesIcoulddothecriadatheroomlooksallrightsinceIchangedittheotherwayyouseesomethingwastellingmeallthetimeIdhavetointroducemyselfnotknowingmefromAdamveryfunnywouldntitImhiswifeorpretendwewereinSpainwithhimhalfawakewithoutaGodsnotionwhereheisdoshuevosestrelladossenorLordthecrackedthingscomeintomyheadsometimesitdbegreatfunsupposinghestayedwithuswhynottherestheroomupstairsemptyandMillysbedinthebackroomhecoulddohiswritingandstudiesatthetableinthereforallthescribblinghedoesatitandifhewantstoreadinbedinthemorninglikemeashesmakingthebreakfastforIhecanmakeitfor2ImsureImnotgoingtotakeinlodgersoffthestreetforhimifhetakesagesaboofahouselikethisIdlovetohavealongtalkwithanintelligentwell-educatedpersonIdhavetogetanicepairofredslipperslikethoseTurkswiththefezusedtoselloryellowandanicesemitransparentmorninggownthatIbadlywantorapeachblossomdressingjacketliketheonelongagoinWalpolesonly8/6or18/6IlljustgivehimonemorechanceIllgetupearlyinthemorningImsickofCohensoldbedinanycaseImightgoovertothemarketstoseeallthevegetablesandcabbagesandtomatoesandcarrotsandallkindsofsplendidfruitsallcominginlovelyandfreshwhoknowswhodbethe1stmanIdmeettheyreoutlookingforitinthemorningMamyDillonusedtosaytheyareandthenighttoothatwashermassgoingIdloveabigjuicypearnowtomeltinyourmouthlikewhenIusedtobeinthelongingwaythenIllthrowhimuphiseggsandteainthemoustachecupshegavehimtomakehismouthbiggerIsupposehedlikemynicecreamtooIknowwhatIlldoIllgoaboutrathergaynottoomuchsingingabitnowandthenmifapietiMasettothenIllstartdressingmyselftogooutprestononsonpillforteIllputonmybestshiftanddrawerslethimhaveagoodeyefuloutofthattomakehismickystandforhimIlllethimknowifthatswhathewantedthathiswifeisfuckedyesanddamnwellfuckedtoouptomynecknearlynotbyhim5or6timeshandrunningtheresthemarkofhisspunkonthecleansheetIwouldntbothertoevenironitoutthatoughttosatisfyhimifyoudontbelievemefeelmybellyunlessImadehimstandthereandputhimintomeIveamindtotellhimeveryscrapandmakehimdoitinfrontofmeservehimrightitsallhisownfaultifIamanadulteressasthethinginthegallerysaidOmuchaboutitifthatsalltheharmeverwedidinthisvaleoftearsGodknowsitsnotmuchdoesnteverybodyonlytheyhideitIsupposethatswhatawomanissupposedtobetherefororHewouldnthavemadeusthewayHedidsoattractivetomenthenifhewantstokissmybottomIlldragopenmydrawersandbulgeitrightoutinhisfaceaslargeaslifehecanstickhistongue7milesupmyholeashestheremybrownpartthenIlltellhimIwant#1orperhaps30/-IlltellhimIwanttobuyunderclothesthenifhegivesmethatwellhewontbetoobadIdontwanttosoakitalloutofhimlikeotherwomendoIcouldoftenhavewrittenoutafinechequeformyselfandwritehisnameonitforacoupleofpoundsafewtimesheforgottolockitupbesideshewontspenditIlllethimdoitoffonmebehindprovidedhedoesntsmearallmygooddrawersOIsupposethatcantbehelpedIlldotheindifferentIor2questionsIllknowbytheanswerswhenheslikethathecantkeepathingbackIknoweveryturninhimIlltightenmybottomwellandletoutafewsmuttywordssmellrumporlickmyshitorthefirstmadthingcomesintomyheadthenIllsuggestaboutyesOwaitnowsonnymyturniscomingIllbequitegayandfriendlyoveritObutIwasforgettingthisbloodypestofathingpfoohyouwouldn’tknowwhichtolaughorcryweresuchamixtureofplumandapplenoIllhavetoweartheoldthingssomuchthebetteritllbemorepointedhellneverknowwhetherhediditnornottherethatsgoodenoughforyouanyoldthingatallthenIllwipehimoffmejustlikeabusinesshisomissionthenIllgooutIllhavehimeyeingupattheceilingwhereisshegonenowmakehimwantmethatstheonlywayaquarterafterwhatanunearthlyhourIsupposetheyrejustgettingupinChinanowcombingouttheirpigtailsforthedaywellsoonhavethenunsringingtheangelustheyvenobodycomingintospoiltheirsleepexceptanoddpriestortwoforhisnightofficethealarmclocknextdooratcockshoutclatteringthebrainsoutofitselfletmeseeifIcandoseoff12345whatkindofflowersarethosetheyinventedlikethestarsthewallpaperinLombardstreetwasmuchnicertheapronhegavemewaslikethatsomethingonlyIonlyworeittwicebetterlowerthislampandtryagainsoasIcangetupearlyIllgotoLambestherebesideFindlatersandgetthemtosendussomeflowerstoputabouttheplaceincasehebringshimhometomorrowtodayImeannonoFridaysanunluckydayfirstIwanttodotheplaceupsomewaythedustgrowsinitIthinkwhileImasleepthenwecanhavemusicandcigarettesIcanaccompanyhimfirstImustcleanthekeysofthepianowithmilkwhatllIwearshallIwearawhiteroseorthosefairycakesinLiptonsIlovethesmellofarichbigshopat71/2dalbortheotheroneswiththecherriesinthemandthepinkysugarlidacoupleoflbsofcourseaniceplantforthemiddleofthetableIdgetthatcheaperinwaitwheresthisIsawthemnotlongagoIloveflowersIdlovetohavethewholeplaceswimminginrosesGodofheaventheresnothinglikenaturethewildmountainsthentheseaandthewavesrushingthenthebeautifulcountrywithfieldsofoatsandwheatandallkindsofthingsandallthefinecattlegoingaboutthatwoulddoyourheartgoodtoseeriversandlakesandflowersallsortsofshapesandsmellsandcoloursspringingupevenoutoftheditchesprimrosesandvioletsnatureitisasforthemsayingtheresnoGodIwouldntgiveasnapofmytwofingersforalltheirlearningwhydonttheygoandcreatesomethingIoftenaskedhimatheistsorwhatevertheycallthemselvesgoandwashthecobblesoffthemselvesfirstthentheygohowlingforthepriestandtheydyingandwhywhybecausetheyreafraidofhellonaccountoftheirbadconscienceahyesIknowthemwellwhowasthefirstpersonintheuniversebeforetherewasanybodythatmadeitallwhoahthattheydontknowneitherdoIsothereyouaretheymightaswelltrytostopthesunfromrisingtomorrowthesunshinesforyouhesaidthedaywewerelyingamongtherhododendronsonHowthheadinthegreytweedsuitandhisstrawhatthedayIgothimtoproposetomeyesfirstIgavehimthebitofseedcakeoutofmymouthanditwasleapyearlikenowyes16yearsagomyGodafterthatlongkissInearlostmybreathyeshesaidwasaflowerofthemountainyessoweareflowersallawomansbodyyesthatwasonetruethinghesaidinhislifeandthesunshinesforyoutodayyesthatwaswhyIlikedhimbecauseIsawheunderstoodorfeltwhatawomanisandIknewIcouldalwaysgetroundhimandIgavehimallthepleasureIcouldleadinghimontillheaskedmetosayyesandIwouldntanswerfirstonlylookedoutovertheseaandtheskyIwasthinkingofsomanythingshedidntknowofMulveyandMrStanhopeandHesterandfatherandoldcaptainGrovesandthesailorsplayingallbirdsflyandIsaystoopandwashingupdishestheycalleditonthepierandthesentryinfrontofthegovernorshousewiththethingroundhiswhitehelmetpoordevilhalfroastedandtheSpanishgirlslaughingintheirshawlsandtheirtallcombsandtheauctionsinthemorningtheGreeksandthejewsandtheArabsandthedevilknowswhoelsefromalltheendsofEuropeandDukestreetandthefowlmarketallcluckingoutsideLarbySharansandthepoordonkeysslippinghalfasleepandthevaguefellowsinthecloaksasleepintheshadeonthestepsandthebigwheelsofthecartsofthebullsandtheoldcastlethousandsofyearsoldyesandthosehandsomeMoorsallinwhiteandturbanslikekingsaskingyoutositdownintheirlittlebitofashopandRondawiththeoldwindowsoftheposadasglancingeyesalatticehidforherlovertokisstheironandthewineshopshalfopenatnightandthecastanetsandthenightwemissedtheboatatAlgecirasthewatchmangoingaboutserenewithhislampandOthatawfuldeepdowntorrentOandtheseatheseacrimsonsometimeslikefireandtheglorioussunsetsandthefigtreesintheAlamedagardensyesandallthequeerlittlestreetsandpinkandblueandyellowhousesandtherosegardensandthejessamineandgeraniumsandcactusesandGibraltarasagirlwhereIwasaFlowerofthemountainyeswhenIputtheroseinmyhairliketheAndalusiangirlsusedorshallIweararedyesandhowhekissedmeundertheMoorishwallandIthoughtwellaswellhimasanotherandthenIaskedhimwithmyeyestoaskagainyesandthenheaskedmewouldIyestosayyesmymountainflowerandfirstIputmyarmsaroundhimyesanddrewhimdowntomesohecouldfeelmybreastsallperfumeyesandhisheartwasgoinglikemadandyesIsaidyesIwillYes。

  Trieste-Zürich-Paris,1914——1921

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