Mydiseasewasnotacasewithintheprovinceofempirics，andI
bethoughtmyselfofconfidinginM。deisHayewhowasthendiningeverydaywithme，andmadenomysteryofhispoverty。Heplacedmeinthehandsofaskilfulsurgeon，whowasatthesametimeadentist。HerecognizedcertainsymptomswhichmadeitanecessitytosacrificemetothegodMercury，andthattreatment，owingtotheseasonoftheyear，compelledmetokeepmyroomforsixweeks。Itwasduringthewinterof1749。
WhileIwasthuscuringmyselfofanuglydisease，DelaHayeinoculatedmewithanotherasbad，perhapsevenworse，whichIshouldneverhavethoughtmyselfsusceptibleofcatching。ThisFleming，wholeftmeonlyforonehourinthemorning，togo——atleasthesaidso—
—tochurchtoperformhisdevotions，madeabigotofme！Andtosuchanextent，thatIagreedwithhimthatIwasindeedfortunatetohavecaughtadiseasewhichwastheoriginofthefaithnowtakingpossessionofmysoul。IwouldthankGodferventlyandwiththemostcompleteconvictionforhavingemployedMercurytoleadmymind，untilthenwrappedindarkness，tothepurelightofholytruth！
Thereisnodoubtthatsuchanextraordinarychangeinmyreasoningsystemwastheresultoftheexhaustionbroughtonbythemercury。
ThatimpureandalwaysinjuriousmetalhadweakenedmymindtosuchanextentthatIhadbecomealmostbesotted，andIfanciedthatuntilthenmyjudgmenthadbeeninsane。Theresultwasthat，inmynewlyacquiredwisdom，Itooktheresolutionofleadingatotallydifferentsortoflifeinfuture。DelaHayewouldoftencryforjoywhenhesawmesheddingtearscausedbythecontritionwhichhehadhadthewonderfulclevernesstosowinmypoorsicklysoul。Hewouldtalktomeofparadiseandtheotherworld，justasifhehadvisitedtheminperson，andIneverlaughedathim！Hehadaccustomedmetorenouncemyreason；nowtorenouncethatdivinefacultyamanmustnolongerbeconsciousofitsvalue，hemusthavebecomeanidiot。ThereadermayjudgeofthestatetowhichIwasreducedbythefollowingspecimen。Oneday，DelaHayesaidtome:
\"ItisnotknownwhetherGodcreatedtheworldduringthevernalequinoxorduringtheautumnalone。\"
\"Creationbeinggranted，\"Ireplied，inspiteofthemercury，\"suchaquestionischildish，fortheseasonsarerelative，anddifferinthedifferentquartersoftheglobe。\"
DelaHayereproachedmewiththeheathenismofmyideas，toldmethatImustabandonsuchimpiousreasonings……andIgaveway！
ThatmanhadbeenaJesuit。Henotonly，however，refusedtoadmitit，buthewouldnotevensufferanyonetomentionittohim。Thisishowhecompletedhisworkofseductionbytellingmethehistoryofhislife。
\"AfterIhadbeeneducatedinagoodschool，\"hesaid，\"andhaddevotedmyselfwithsomesuccesstotheartsandsciences，IwasfortwentyyearsemployedattheUniversityofParis。AfterwardsI
servedasanengineerinthearmy，andsincethattimeIhavepublishedseveralworksanonymously，whicharenowinuseineveryboys’school。Havinggivenupthemilitaryservice，andbeingpoor，Iundertookandcompletedtheeducationofseveralyoungmen，someofwhomshinenowintheworldevenmorebytheirexcellentconductthanbytheirtalents。MylastpupilwastheMarquisBotta。NowbeingwithoutemploymentIlive，asyousee，trustinginGod’sprovidence。
Fouryearsago，ImadetheacquaintanceofBaronBavois，fromLausanne，sonofGeneralBavoiswhocommandedaregimentintheserviceoftheDukeofModem，andafterwardswasunfortunateenoughtomakehimselftooconspicuous。Theyoungbaron，aCalvinistlikehisfather，didnotliketheidlelifehewasleadingathome，andhesolicitedmetoundertakehiseducationinordertofithimforamilitarycareer。Delightedattheopportunityofcultivatinghisfinenaturaldisposition，Igaveupeverythingtodevotemyselfentirelytomytask。Isoondiscoveredthat，inthequestionoffaith，heknewhimselftobeinerror，andthatheremainedaCalvinistonlyoutofrespecttohisfamily。WhenIhadfoundouthissecretfeelingsonthathead，Ihadnodifficultyinprovingtohimthathismostimportantinterestswereinvolvedinthatquestion，ashiseternalsalvationwasatstake。Struckbythetruthofmywords，heabandonedhimselftomyaffection，andItookhimtoRome，whereIpresentedhimtothePope，BenedictXIV。，who，immediatelyaftertheabjurationofmypupilgothimalieutenancyinthearmyoftheDukeofModena。Butthedearproselyte，whoisonlytwenty—fiveyearsofage，cannotliveuponhispayofsevensequinsamonth，andsincehisabjurationhehasreceivednothingfromhisparents，whoarehighlyincensedatwhattheycallhisapostacy。HewouldfindhimselfcompelledtogobacktoLausanne，ifIdidnotassisthim。
But，alas！Iampoor，andwithoutemployment，soIcanonlysendhimthetriflingsumswhichIcanobtainfromthefewgoodChristianswithwhomIamacquainted。
\"Mypupil，whoseheartisfullofgratitude，wouldbeverygladtoknowhisbenefactors，buttheyrefusetoacquainthimwiththeirnames，andtheyareright，becausecharity，inordertobemeritorious，mustnotpartakeofanyfeelingofvanity。ThankGod，Ihavenocauseforsuchafeeling！Iambuttoohappytoactasafathertowardsayoungsaint，andtohavehadashare，asthehumbleinstrumentoftheAlmighty，inthesalvationofhissoul。Thathandsomeandgoodyoungmantrustsnoonebutme，andwritestomeregularlytwiceaweek。Iamtoodiscreettocommunicatehisletterstoyou，but，ifyouweretoreadthem，theywouldmakeyouweepforsympathy。ItistohimthatIhavesentthethreegoldpieceswhichyougavemeyesterday。\"
Ashesaidthelastwordsmyconverterrose，andwenttothewindowtodryhistears，Ifeltdeeplymoved，analfullofadmirationforthevirtueofDelaHayeandofhispupil，who，tosavehissoul，hadplacedhimselfunderthehardnecessityofacceptingalms。Icriedaswellastheapostle，andinmydawningpietyItoldhimthatI
insistednotonlyuponremainingunknowntohispupil，butalsouponignoringtheamountofthesumshemighttakeoutofmypursetoforwardtohim，andIthereforebeggedthathewouldhelphimselfwithoutrenderingmeanyaccount。DelaHayeembracedmewarmly，sayingthat，byfollowingthepreceptsoftheGospelsowell，I
shouldcertainlywinthekingdomofheaven。
Themindissuretofollowthebody；itisaprivilegeenjoyedbymatter。Withanemptystomach，Ibecameafanatic；andthehollowmadeinmybrainbythemercurybecamethehomeofenthusiasm。
WithoutmentioningittoDelaHaye，Iwrotetomythreefriends，Messrs。Bragadinandcompany，severallettersfullofpathosconcerningmyTartufeandhispupil，andImanagedtocommunicatemyfanaticismtothem。Youareaware，dearreader，thatnothingissocatchingastheplague；now，fanaticism，nomatterofwhatnature，isonlytheplagueofthehumanmind。
Imademyfriendstounderstandthatthegoodofoursocietydependedupontheadmissionofthesetwovirtuousindividuals。Iallowedthemtoguessit，but，havingmyselfbecameaJesuit，Itookcarenottosayitopenly。Itwouldofcoursebebetterifsuchanideaappearedtohaveemanatedfromthosemen，sosimple，andatthesametimesotrulyvirtuous。\"ItisGod’swill，\"Iwrotetothem（fordeceitmustalwaystakerefugeundertheprotectionofthatsacredname），\"thatyouemployallyourinfluenceinVenicetofindanhonourablepositionforM。delaHaye，andtopromotetheinterestsofyoungM。Bavoisinhisprofession。\"
M。deBragadinansweredthatDelaHayecouldtakeuphisquarterswithusinhispalace，andthatBavoiswastowritetohisprotector，thePope，entreatingHisHolinesstorecommendhimtotheambassadorofVenice，whowouldthenforwardthatrecommendationtotheSenate，andthatBavoiscould，inthatway，feelsureofgoodemployment。
TheaffairofthePatriarchateofAquileiawasatthattimeunderdiscussion；theRepublicofVenicewasinpossessionofitaswellastheEmperorofAustria，whoclaimedthe’juseligendi’:thePopeBenedictXIV。hadbeenchosenasarbitrator，andashehadnotyetgivenhisdecisionitwasevidentthattheRepublicwouldshewverygreatdeferencetohisrecommendation。
Whilethatimportantaffairwasenlistingalloursympathies，andwhiletheywereexpectinginVenicealetterstatingtheeffectofthePope’srecommendation，Iwastheheroofacomicadventurewhich，forthesakeofmyreaders，mustnotpassunnoticed。
AtthebeginningofAprilIwasentirelycuredofmylastmisfortune。
Ihadrecoveredallmyusualvigour，andIaccompaniedmyconvertertochurcheveryday，nevermissingasermon。Welikewisespenttheeveningtogetheratthecaf？wherewegenerallymetagreatmanyofficers。TherewasamongthemaProvencalwhoamusedeverybodywithhisboastingandwiththerecitalofthemilitaryexploitsbywhichhepretendedtohavedistinguishedhimselfintheserviceofseveralcountries，andprincipallyinSpain。Ashewastrulyasourceofamusement，everybodypretendedtobelievehiminordertokeepupthegame。OnedayasIwasstaringathim，heaskedmewhetherIknewhim。
\"ByGeorge，sir！\"——Iexclaimed，\"knowyou！Why，didwenotfightsidebysideatthebattleofArbela？\"
Atthosewordseverybodyburstoutlaughing，buttheboaster，nothingdaunted，said，withanimation，\"Well，gentlemen，Idonotseeanythingsoverylaughableinthat。I
wasatthatbattle，andthereforethisgentlemanmightverywellhaveremarkedme；infact，IthinkIcanrecollecthim。\"
And，continuingtospeaktome，henamedtheregimentinwhichwewerebrotherofficers。Ofcourseweembracedoneanother，congratulatingeachotheruponthepleasurewebothfeltinmeetingagaininParma。AfterthattrulycomicjokeIleftthecoffee—roominthecompanyofmyinseparablepreacher。
Thenextmorning，asIwasatbreakfastwithDelaHaye，theboastingProvencalenteredmyroomwithouttakingoffhishat，andsaid，\"M。d’Arbela，Ihavesomethingofimportancetotellyou；makehasteandfollowme。Ifyouareafraid，youmaytakeanyoneyoupleasewithyou。Iamgoodforhalfadozenmen。\"
Ileftmychair，seizedmypistols，andaimedathim。
\"Noone，\"Isaid，withdecision，\"hastherighttocomeanddisturbmeinmyroom；beoffthisminute，orIblowyourbrainsout。\"
Thefellow，drawinghissword，daredmetomurderhim，butatthesamemomentDelaHayethrewhimselfbetweenus，stampingviolentlyonthefloor。Thelandlordcameup，andthreatenedtheofficertosendforthepoliceifhedidnotwithdrawimmediately。
Hewentaway，sayingthatIhadinsultedhiminpublic，andthathewouldtakecarethatthereparationIowedhimshouldbeaspublicastheinsult。
Whenhehadgone，seeingthattheaffairmighttakeatragicturn，I
begantoexaminewithDelaHayehowitcouldbeavoided，butwehadnotlongtopuzzleourimagination，forinlessthanhalfanhouranofficeroftheInfanteofParmapresentedhimself，andrequestedmetorepairimmediatelytohead—quarters，whereM。deBertolan，CommanderofParma，wantedtospeaktome。
IaskedDelaHayetoaccompanymeasawitnessofwhatIhadsaidinthecoffee—roomaswellasofwhathadtakenplaceinmyapartment。
Ipresentedmyselfbeforethecommander，whomIfoundsurroundedbyseveralofficers，and，amongthem，thebraggingProvencal。
M。deBertolan，whowasawittyman，smiledwhenhesawme；then，withaveryseriouscountenance，hesaidtome，\"Sir，asyouhavemadealaughing—stockofthisofficerinapublicplace，itisbutrightthatyoushouldgivehimpubliclythesatisfactionwhichheclaims，andascommanderofthiscityIfindmyselfboundindutytoaskyouforthatsatisfactioninordertosettletheaffairamicably。\"
\"Commander，\"Ianswered，\"Idonotseewhyasatisfactionshouldbeofferedtothisgentleman，foritisnottruethatIhaveinsultedhimbyturninghimintoridicule。ItoldhimthatIhadseenhimatthebattleofArbela，andIcouldnothaveanydoubtaboutitwhenhesaidthathehadbeenpresentatthatbattle，andthatheknewmeagain。\"
\"Yes，\"interruptedtheofficer，\"butIheardRodelaandnotArbela，andeverybodyknowsthatIfoughtatRodela。ButyousaidArbela，andcertainlywiththeintentionoflaughingatme，sincethatbattlehasbeenfoughtmorethantwothousandyearsago，whilethebattleofRodelainAfricatookplaceinourtime，andIwasthereundertheordersoftheDukedeMortemar。\"
\"Inthefirstplace，sir，youhavenorighttojudgeofmyintentions，butIdonotdisputeyourhavingbeenpresentatRodela，sinceyousayso；butinthatcasethetablesareturned，andnowI
demandareparationfromyouifyoudarediscreditmyhavingbeenatArbela。IcertainlydidnotserveundertheDukedeMortemar，becausehewasnotthere，atleasttomyknowledge，butIwasaid—de—
campofParmenion，andIwaswoundedunderhiseyes。Ifyouweretoaskmetoshewyouthescar，Icouldnotsatisfyyou，foryoumustunderstandthatthebodyIhadatthattimedoesnotexistanylonger，andinmypresentbodilyenvelopeIamonlytwenty—threeyearsold。\"
\"Allthisseemstomesheermadness，but，atallevents，Ihavewitnessestoprovethatyouhavebeenlaughingatme，foryoustatedthatyouhadseenmeatthatbattle，and，bythepowers！itisnotpossible，becauseIwasnotthere。Atallevents，Idemandsatisfaction。\"
\"SodoI，andwehaveequalrights，ifminearenotevenbetterthanyours，foryourwitnessesarelikewisemine，andthesegentlemenwillassertthatyousaidthatyouhadseenmeatRodela，and，bythepowers！itisnotpossible，forIwasnotthere。\"
\"Well，Imayhavemadeamistake。\"
\"SomayI，andthereforewehavenolongeranyclaimagainstoneanother。\"
Thecommander，whowasbitinghislipstorestrainhismirth，saidtohim，\"Mydearsir，Idonotseethatyouhavetheslightestrighttodemandsatisfaction，sincethisgentlemanconfesses，likeyou，thathemighthavebeenmistaken。\"
\"But，\"remarkedtheofficer，\"isitcrediblethathewasatthebattleofArbela？\"
\"Thisgentlemanleavesyoufreetobelieveornottobelieve，andheisatlibertytoassertthathewasthereuntilyoucanprovethecontrary。Doyouwishtodenyittomakehimdrawhissword？\"
\"Godforbid！Iwouldratherconsidertheaffairended。\"
\"Well，gentlemen，\"saidthecommander，\"Ihavebutonemoredutytoperform，anditistoadviseyoutoembraceoneanotherliketwohonestmen。\"
Wefollowedtheadvicewithgreatpleasure。
Thenextday，theProvencal，rathercrestfallen，cametosharemydinner，andIgavehimafriendlywelcome。Thuswasendedthatcomicadventure，tothegreatsatisfactionofM。delaHaye。
CHAPTERIV
IReceiveGoodNewsFromVenice，toWhichCityIReturnwithDelaHayeandBavois——MyThreeFriendsGiveMeaWarmWelcome；TheirSurpriseatFindingMeaModelofDevotion——BavoisLuresMeBacktoMyFormerWayofLiving——DelaHayeaThoroughHypocrite——
AdventurewiththeGirlMarchetti——IWinaPrizeintheLottery——I
MeetBaletti——DelaHayeLeavesM。deBragadin’sPalace——MyDepartureforParisWhilstDelaHayewaseverydaygaininggreaterinfluenceovermyweakenedmind，whilstIwaseverydaydevoutlyattendingmass，sermons，andeveryofficeoftheChurch，IreceivedfromVenicealettercontainingthepleasantinformationthatmyaffairhadfolloweditsnaturalcourse，namely，thatitwasentirelyforgotten；
andinanotherletterM。deBragadininformedmethattheministerhadwrittentotheVenetianambassadorinRomewithinstructionstoassuretheHolyFatherthatBaronBavoiswould，immediatelyafterhisarrivalinVenice，receiveinthearmyoftheRepublicanappointmentwhichwouldenablehimtolivehonourablyandtogainahighpositionbyhistalents。
ThatletterovercameM。delaHayewithjoy，andIcompletedhishappinessbytellinghimthatnothinghinderedmefromgoingbacktomynativecity。
HeimmediatelymadeuphismindtogotoModenainordertoexplaintohispupilhowhewastoactinVenicetoopenforhimselfthewaytoabrilliantfortune。DelaHayedependedonmeineveryway；hesawmyfanaticism，andhewaswellawarethatitisadiseasewhichragesaslongasthecausesfromwhichithassprungareinexistence。AshewasgoingwithmetoVenice，heflatteredhimselfthathecouldeasilyfeedthefirehehadlighted。ThereforehewrotetoBavoisthathewouldjoinhimimmediately，andtwodaysafterhetookleaveofme，weepingabundantly，praisinghighlythevirtuesofmysoul，callingmehisson，hisdearson，andassuringmethathisgreataffectionformehadbeencausedbythemarkofelectionwhichhehadseenonmycountenance。Afterthat，Ifeltmycallingandelectionweresure。
AfewdaysafterthedepartureofDelaHaye，IleftParmainmycarriagewithwhichIpartedinFusina，andfromthereIproceededtoVenice。Afteranabsenceofayear，mythreefriendsreceivedmeasifIhadbeentheirguardianangel。Theyexpressedtheirimpatiencetowelcomethetwosaintsannouncedbymyletters。AnapartmentwasreadyforDelaHayeinthepalaceofM。deBragadin，andasstatereasonsdidnotallowmyfathertoreceiveinhisownhouseaforeignerwhohadnotyetenteredtheserviceoftheRepublic，tworoomshadbeenengagedforBavoisintheneighbourhood。
Theywerethoroughlyamazedatthewonderfulchangewhichhadtakenplaceinmymorals。Everydayattendingmass，oftenpresentatthepreachingandattheotherservices，nevershewingmyselfatthecasino，frequentingonlyacertaincaf？whichwastheplaceofmeetingforallmenofacknowledgedpietyandreserve，andalwaysstudyingwhenIwasnotintheircompany。Whentheycomparedmyactualmodeoflivingwiththeformerone，theymarvelled，andtheycouldnotsufficientlythanktheeternalprovidenceofGodwhoseinconceivablewaystheyadmired。Theyblessedthecriminalactionswhichhadcompelledmetoremainoneyearawayfrommynativeplace。
IcrownedtheirdelightbypayingallmydebtswithoutaskinganymoneyfromM。deBragadin，who，nothavinggivenmeanythingforoneyear，hadreligiouslyputtogethereverymonththesumhehadallowedme。Ineednotsayhowpleasedtheworthyfriendswere，whentheysawthatIhadentirelygivenupgambling。
IhadaletterfromDelaHayeinthebeginningofMay。Heannouncedthathewasontheeveofstartingwiththesonsodeartohisheart，andthathewouldsoonplacehimselfatthedispositionoftherespectablementowhomIhadannouncedhim。
KnowingthehouratwhichthebargearrivedfromModena，weallwenttomeetthem，exceptM。deBragadin，whowasengagedatthesenate。
Wereturnedtothepalacebeforehim，andwhenhecameback，findingusalltogether，hegavehisnewgueststhemostfriendlywelcome。
DelaHayespoketomeofahundredthings，butIscarcelyheardwhathesaid，somuchwasmyattentiontakenupbyBavois。HewassodifferenttowhatIhadfanciedhimtobefromtheimpressionIhadreceivedfromDelaHaye，thatmyideaswerealtogetherupset。Ihadtostudyhim；forthreedaysbeforeIcouldmakeupmymindtolikehim。Imustgivehisportraittomyreaders。
BaronBavoiswasayoungmanofabouttwenty—five，ofmiddlesize，handsomeinfeatures，wellmade，fair，ofanequabletemper，speakingwellandwithintelligence，andutteringhiswordswithatoneofmodestywhichsuitedhimexactly。Hisfeatureswereregularandpleasing，histeethwerebeautiful，hishairwaslongandfine，alwayswelltakencareof，andexhalingtheperfumeofthepomatumwithwhichitwasdressed。Thatindividual，whowastheexactoppositeofthemanthatDelaHayehadledmetoimagine，surprisedmyfriendsgreatly，buttheirwelcomedidnotinanywaybetraytheirastonishment，fortheirpureandcandidmindswouldnotadmitajudgmentcontrarytothegoodopiniontheyhadformedofhismorals。
AssoonaswehadestablishedDelaHayeinhisbeautifulapartment，IaccompaniedBavoistotheroomsengagedforhim，wherehisluggagehadbeensentbymyorders。Hefoundhimselfinverycomfortablequarters，andbeingreceivedwithdistinctionbyhisworthyhost，whowasalreadygreatlyprejudicedinhisfavour，theyoungbaronembracedmewarmly，pouringoutallhisgratitude，andassuringmethathefeltdeeplyallIhaddoneforhimwithoutknowinghim，asDelaHayehadinformedhimofallthathadoccurred。Ipretendednottounderstandwhathewasalludingto，andtochangethesubjectofconversationIaskedhimhowheintendedtooccupyhistimeinVeniceuntilhismilitaryappointmentgavehimseriousdutiestoperform。
\"Itrust，\"heanswered，\"thatweshallenjoyourselvesinanagreeableway，forIhavenodoubtthatourinclinationsarethesame。\"
MercuryandDelaHayehadsocompletelybesottedmethatIshouldhavefoundsomedifficultyinunderstandingthesewords，howeverintelligibletheywere；butifIdidnotgoanyfurtherthantheoutwardsignificationofhisanswer，Icouldnothelpremarkingthathehadalreadytakenthefancyofthetwodaughtersofthehouse。
Theywereneitherprettynorugly，butheshewedhimselfgracioustowardsthemlikeamanwhounderstandshisbusiness。Ihad，however，alreadymadesuchgreatprogressinmymysticaleducation，thatIconsideredthecomplimentsheaddressedtothegirlsasmereformsofpoliteness。
Forthefirstday，ItookmyyoungbarononlytotheSt。Mark’sSquareandtothecaf？whereweremaineduntilsupper—time，asithadbeenarrangedthathewouldtakehismealswithus。Atthesupper—tableheshewedhimselfverywitty，andM。Dandolonamedanhourforthenextday，whenheintendedtopresenthimtothesecretaryforwar。IntheeveningIaccompaniedhimtohislodging，whereIfoundthatthetwoyounggirlsweredelightedbecausetheyoungSwissnoblemanhadnoservant，andbecausetheyhopedtoconvincehimthathewouldnotrequireone。
Thenextday，alittleearlierthanthetimeappointed，IcalleduponhimwithM。DandoloandM。Barbaro，whowerebothtopresenthimatthewaroffice。Wefoundhimathistoiletunderthedelicatehandsoftheeldestgirl，whowasdressinghishair。Hisroom，wasfragrantwiththeperfumesofhispomatumsandscents。Thisdidnotindicateasaintedman；yetmytwofriendsdidnotfeelscandalized，althoughtheirastonishmentwasveryevident，fortheyhadnotexpectedthatshowofgallantryfromayoungneophyte。Iwasnearlyburstingintoaloudlaugh，whenIheardM。Dandoloremarkthat，unlesswehurried，wewouldnothavetimetohearmass，whereuponBavoisenquiredwhetheritwasafestival。M。Dandolo，withoutpassinganyremark，answerednegatively，andafterthat，masswasnotagainmentioned。WhenBavoiswasready，Ileftthemandwentadifferentway。Imetthemagainatdinner—time，duringwhichthereceptiongiventotheyoungbaronbythesecretarywasdiscussed，andintheeveningmyfriendsintroducedhimtoseveralladieswhoweremuchpleasedwithhim。Inlessthanaweekhewassowellknownthattherewasnofearofhistimehangingwearilyonhishands，butthatweekwaslikewiseenoughtogivemeaperfectinsightintohisnatureandwayofthinking。Ishouldnothaverequiredsuchalongstudy，ifIhadnotatfirstbegunonawrongscent，orratherifmyintelligencehadnotbeenstultifiedbymyfanaticism。Bavoiswasparticularlyfondofwomen，ofgambling，ofeveryluxury，and，ashewaspoor，womensuppliedhimwiththebestpartofhisresources。Astoreligiousfaithhehadnone，andashewasnohypocriteheconfessedasmuchtome。
\"Howhaveyoucontrived，\"Isaidtohimoneday，\"suchasyouare，todeceiveDelaHaye？\"
\"GodforbidIshoulddeceiveanyone。DelaHayeisperfectlywellawareofmysystem，andofmywayofthinkingonreligiousmatters，but，beinghimselfverydevout，heentertainsaholysympathyformysoul，andIdonotobjecttoit。Hehasbestowedmanykindnessesuponme，andIfeelgratefultohim；myaffectionforhimisallthegreaterbecauseheneverteasesmewithhisdogmaticlessonsorwithsermonsrespectingmysalvation，ofwhichIhavenodoubtthatGod，inHisfatherlygoodness，willtakecare。AllthisissettledbetweenDelaHayeandme，andweliveonthebestofterms:\"
Thebestpartofthejokeisthat，whileIwasstudyinghim，Bavois，withoutknowingit，restoredmymindtoitsoriginalstate，andIwasashamedofmyselfwhenIrealizedthatIhadbeenthedupeofaJesuitwhowasanarranthypocrite，inspiteofthecharacterofholinesswhichheassumed，andwhichhecouldplaywithsuchmarvellousability。FromthatmomentIfellagainintoallmyformerpractices。ButletusreturntoDelaHaye。
ThatlateJesuit，whoinhisinmostheartlovednothingbuthisowncomfort，alreadyadvancedinyears，andthereforenolongercaringforthefairsex，wasexactlythesortofmantopleasemysimplemindedtriooffriends。AsheneverspoketothembutofGod，ofHisangels，andofeverlastingglory，andashewasalwaysaccompanyingthemtochurch，theyfoundhimadelightfulcompanion。
Theylongedforthetimewhenhewoulddiscoverhimself，fortheyimaginedhewasattheveryleastaRosicrucian，orperhapsthehermitofCourpegna，whohadtaughtmethecabalisticscienceandmademeapresentoftheimmortalParalis。Theyfeltgrievedbecausetheoraclehadforbiddenthem，throughmycabalisticlips，evertomentionmyscienceinthepresenceofTartufe。
AsIhadforeseen，thatinterdictionleftmetoenjoyasIpleasedallthetimethatIwouldhavebeencalledupontodevotetotheirdevoutcredulity，andbesides，IwasnaturallyafraidlestDelaHaye，suchasItrulybelievedhimtobe，wouldneverlendhimselftothattriflingnonsense，andwould，forthesakeofdeservinggreaterfavourattheirhands，endeavourtoundeceivethemandtotakemyplaceintheirconfidence。
IsoonfoundoutthatIhadactedwithprudence，forinlessthanthreeweeksthecunningfoxhadobtainedsogreataninfluenceoverthemindofmythreefriendsthathewasfoolishenough，notonlytobelievethathedidnotwantmeanymoretosupporthiscreditwiththem，butlikewisethathecouldsupplantmewheneverhechose。I
couldseeitclearlyinhiswayofaddressingme，aswellasinthechangeinhisproceedings。
HewasbeginningtoholdwithmyfriendsfrequentconversationstowhichIwasnotsummoned，andhehadcontrivedtomakethemintroducehimtoseveralfamilieswhichIwasnotinthehabitofvisiting。Heassumedhisgrandjesuiticairs，and，althoughwithhoneyedwordhewouldtakethelibertyofcensuringmebecauseIsometimesspentanightout，and，ashewouldsay，\"Godknowswhere！\"
Iwasparticularlyvexedathisseemingtoaccusemeofleadinghispupilastray。Hethenwouldassumethetoneofamanspeakingjestingly，butIwasnotdeceived。Ithoughtitwastimetoputanendtohisgame，andwiththatintentionIpaidhimavisitinhisbedroom。WhenIwasseated，Isaid，\"Icome，asatrueworshipperoftheGospel，totellyouinprivatesomethingthat，anothertime，Iwouldsayinpublic。\"
\"Whatisit，mydearfriend？\"
\"IadviseyouforthefuturenottohurlatmetheslightesttauntrespectingthelifeIamleadingwithBavois，whenweareinthepresenceofmythreeworthyfriends。Idonotobjecttolistentoyouwhenwearealone。\"
\"Youarewrongintakingmyinnocentjestsseriously。\"
\"Wrongorright，thatdoesnotmatter。Whydoyouneverattackyourproselyte？Becarefulforthefuture，orImightonmyside，andonlyinjestlikeyou，throwatyourheadsomereparteewhichyouhaveeveryreasontofear，andthusrepayyouwithinterest。\"
AndbowingtohimIlefthisroom。
AfewdaysafterwardsIspentafewhourswithmyfriendsandParalis，andtheoracleenjoinedthemnevertoaccomplishwithoutmyadviceanythingthatmightberecommendedoreveninsinuatedbyValentine；thatwasthecabalisticnameofthediscipleofEscobar。
IknewIcouldrelyupontheirobediencetothatorder。
DelaHayesoontooknoticeofsomeslightchange；hebecamemorereserved，andBavois，whomIinformedofwhatIhaddone，gavemehisfullapprobation。Hefeltconvinced，asIwas，thatDelaHayehadbeenusefultohimonlythroughweakorselfishreasons，thatis，thathewouldhavecaredlittleforhissoulifhisfacehadnotbeenhandsome，andifhehadnotknownthathewouldderiveimportantadvantagesfromhavingcausedhisso—calledconversion。
FindingthattheVenetiangovernmentwaspostponinghisappointmentfromdaytoday，BavoisenteredtheserviceoftheFrenchambassador。
ThedecisionmadeitnecessaryforhimnotonlytoceasehisvisitstoM。deBragadin，buteventogiveuphisintercoursewithDelaHaye，whowastheguestofthatsenator。
ItisoneofthestrictestlawsoftheRepublicthatthepatriciansandtheirfamiliesshallnotholdanyintercoursewiththeforeignambassadorsandtheirsuites。ButthedecisiontakenbyBavoisdidnotpreventmyfriendsspeakinginhisfavour，andtheysucceededinobtainingemploymentforhim，aswillbeseenfurtheron。
ThehusbandofChristine，whomInevervisited，invitedmetogotothecasinowhichhewasinthehabitoffrequentingwithhisauntandhiswife，whohadalreadypresentedhimwithatokenoftheir。
mutualaffection。Iacceptedhisinvitation，andIfoundChristineaslovelyasever，andspeakingtheVenetiandialectlikeherhusband。Imadeinthatcasinotheacquaintanceofachemist，whoinspiredmewiththewishtofollowacourseofchemistry。Iwenttohishouse，whereIfoundayounggirlwhogreatlypleasedme。Shewasaneighbour，andcameeveryeveningtokeepthechemist’selderlywifecompany，andataregularhouraservantcalledtotakeherhome。Ihadnevermadelovetoherbutonceinatriflingsortofway，andinthepresenceoftheoldlady，butIwassurprisednottoseeherafterthatforseveraldays，andIexpressedmyastonishment。Thegoodladytoldmethatverylikelythegirl’scousin，anabbe，withwhomshewasresiding，hadheardofmyseeinghereveryevening，hadbecomejealous，andwouldnotallowhertocomeagain。
\"Anabbejealous？\"
\"Whynot？HeneverallowshertogooutexceptonSundaystoattendthefirstmassattheChurchofSantaMariaMaterDomini，closebyhisdwelling。Hedidnotobjecttohercominghere，becauseheknewthatweneverhadanyvisitors，andverylikelyhehasheardthroughtheservantofyourbeinghereeveryevening。\"
Agreatenemytoalljealouspersons，andagreaterfriendtomyamorousfancies，Iwrotetotheyounggirlthat，ifshewouldleavehercousinforme，Iwouldgiveherahouseinwhichsheshouldbethemistress，andthatIwouldsurroundherwithgoodsocietyandwitheveryluxurytobefoundinVenice。IaddedthatIwouldbeinthechurchonthefollowingSundaytoreceiveheranswer。
Ididnotforgetmyappointment，andheranswerwasthattheabbebeinghertyrant，shewouldconsiderherselfhappytoescapeoutofhisclutches，butthatshecouldnotmakeuphermindtofollowmeunlessIconsentedtomarryher。Sheconcludedherletterbysayingthat，incaseIentertainedhonestintentionstowardsher，Ihadonlytospeaktohermother，JeanneMarchetti，whoresidedinLusia，acitythirtymilesdistantfromVenice。
Thisletterpiquedmycuriosity，andIevenimaginedthatshehadwrittenitinconcertwiththeabbe。Thinkingthattheywantedtodupeme，andbesides，findingtheproposalofmarriageridiculous，I
determinedonhavingmyrevenge。ButIwantedtogettothebottomofit，andImadeupmymindtoseethegirl’smother。Shefelthonouredbymyvisit，andgreatlypleasedwhen，afterIhadshewnherherdaughter’sletter，ItoldherthatIwishedtomarryher，butthatIshouldneverthinkofitaslongassheresidedwiththeabbe。
\"Thatabbe，\"shesaid，\"isadistantrelative。HeusedtolivealoneinhishouseinVenice，andtwoyearsagohetoldmethathewasinwantofahousekeeper。Heaskedmetoletmydaughtergotohiminthatcapacity，assuringmethatinVeniceshewouldhavegoodopportunitiesofgettingmarried。Heofferedtogivemeadeedinwritingstatingthat，onthedayofhermarriage，hewouldgiveherallhisfurniturevaluedataboutonethousandducats，andtheinheritanceofasmallestate，bringingonehundredducatsayear，whichliepossesseshere。Itseemedtomeagoodbargain，and，mydaughterbeingpleasedwiththeoffer，Iaccepted。Hegavemethedeeddulydrawnbyanotary，andmydaughterwentwithhim。Iknowthathemakesaregularslaveofher，butshechosetogo。
Nevertheless，Ineednottellyouthatmymostardentwishistoseehermarried，for，aslongasagirliswithoutahusband，sheistoomuchexposedtotemptation，andthepoormothercannotrestinpeace。\"
\"ThencometoVenicewithme。Youwilltakeyourdaughteroutoftheabbe’shouse，andIwillmakehermywife。UnlessthatisdoneI
cannotmarryher，forIshoulddishonourmyselfifIreceivedmywifefromhishands。\"
\"Oh，no！forheismycousin，althoughonlyinthefourthdegree，and，whatismore，heisapriestandsaysthemasseveryday。\"
\"Youmakemelaugh，mygoodwoman。Everybodyknowsthatapriestsaysthemasswithoutdeprivinghimselfofcertaintriflingenjoyments。Takeyourdaughterwithyou，orgiveupallhopeofeverseeinghermarried。\"
\"ButifItakeherwithme，hewillnotgiveherhisfurniture，andperhapshewillsellhissmallestatehere。\"
\"Iundertaketolooktothatpartofthebusiness。Ipromisetotakeheroutofhishands，andtomakehercomebacktoyouwithallthefurniture，andtoobtaintheestatewhensheismywife。Ifyouknewmebetter，youwouldnotdoubtwhatIsay。CometoVenice，andI
assureyouthatyoushallreturnhereinfourorfivedayswithyourdaughter。\"
Shereadtheletterwhichhadbeenwrittentomebyherdaughteragain，andtoldmethat，beingapoorwidow，shehadnotthemoneynecessarytopaytheexpensesofherjourneytoVenice，orofherreturntoLouisa。
\"InVeniceyoushallnotwantforanything，\"Isaid；\"inthemeantime，herearetensequins。\"
\"Tensequins！ThenIcangowithmysister—in—law？\"
\"Comewithanyoneyoulike，butletusgosoonsoastoreachChiozza，wherewemustsleep。To—morrowweshalldineinVenice，andIundertaketodefrayallexpenses。\"
WearrivedinVenicethenextdayatteno’clock，andItookthetwowomentoCastello，toahousethefirstfloorofwhichwasempty。I
leftthemthere，andprovidedwiththedeedsignedbytheabbeIwenttodinewithmythreefriends，towhomIsaidthatIhadbeentoChiozzaonimportantbusiness。Afterdinner，Icalleduponthelawyer，MarcodeLesse，whotoldmethatifthemotherpresentedapetitiontothePresidentoftheCouncilofTen，shewouldimmediatelybeinvestedwithpowertotakeherdaughterawaywithallthefurnitureinthehouse，whichshecouldsendwherevershepleased。Iinstructedhimtohavethepetitionready，sayingthatI
wouldcomethenextmorningwiththemother，whowouldsignitinhispresence。
Ibroughtthemotherearlyinthemorning，andaftershehadsignedthepetitionwewenttotheBoussole，whereshepresentedittothePresidentoftheCouncil。Inlessthanaquarterofanhourabailiffwasorderedtorepairtothehouseofthepriestwiththemother，andtoputherinpossessionofherdaughter，andofallthefurniture，whichshewouldimmediatelytakeaway。
Theorderwascarriedintoexecutiontotheveryletter。Iwaswiththemotherinagondolaasnearaspossibletothehouse，andIhadprovidedalargeboatinwhichthesbirristowedallthefurniturefoundonthepremises。Whenitwasalldone，thedaughterwasbroughttothegondola，andshewasextremelysurprisedtoseeme。
Hermotherkissedher，andtoldherthatIwouldbeherhusbandtheverynextday。Sheansweredthatshewasdelighted，andthatnothinghadbeenleftinhertyrant’shouseexcepthisbedandhisclothes。
WhenwereachedCastello，Iorderedthefurnituretobebroughtoutoftheboat；wehaddinner，andItoldthethreewomenthattheymustgobacktoLusia，whereIwouldjointhemassoonasIhadsettledallmyaffairs。Ispenttheafternoongailywithmyintended。ShetoldusthattheabbewasdressingwhenthebailiffpresentedtheorderoftheCouncilofTen，withinjunctionstoallowitsfreeexecutionunderpenaltyofdeath；thattheabbefinishedhistoilet，wentouttosayhismass，andthateverythinghadbeendonewithouttheslightestopposition。\"Iwastold，\"sheadded，\"thatmymotherwaswaitingformeinthegondola，butIdidnotexpecttofindyou，andIneversuspectedthatyouwereatthebottomofthewholeaffair。\"
\"ItisthefirstproofIgiveyouofmylove。\"
Thesewordsmadehersmileverypleasantly。
Itookcaretohaveagoodsupperandsomeexcellentwines，andafterwehadspenttwohoursattableinthemidstofthejoysofBacchus，Idevotedfourmoretoapleasanttete—a—tetewithmyintendedbride。
Thenextmorning，afterbreakfast，Ihadthewholeofthefurniturestowedinapeotta，whichIhadengagedforthepurposeandpaidforbeforehand。Igavetenmoresequinstothemother，andsentthemawayallthreeingreatdelight。Theaffairwascompletedtomyhonouraswellastomyentiresatisfaction，andIreturnedhome。
Thecasehadmadesomuchnoisethatmyfriendscouldnothaveremainedignorantofit；theconsequencewasthat，whentheysawme，theyshewedtheirsurpriseandsorrow。DelaHayeembracedmewithanairofprofoundgrief，butitwasafeignedfeeling——aharlequin’sdress，whichhehadthetalentofassumingwiththegreatestfacility。M。deBragadinalonelaughedheartily，sayingtotheothersthattheydidnotunderstandtheaffair，andthatitwastheforerunnerofsomethinggreatwhichwasknownonlytoheavenlyspirits。Onmyside，beingignorantoftheopiniontheyentertainedofthematter，andcertainthattheywerenotinformedofallthecircumstances，IlaughedlikeM。deBragadin，butsaidnothing。I
hadnothingtofear，andIwantedtoamusemyselfwithallthatwouldbesaid。
Wesatdowntotable，andM。Barbarowasthefirsttotellmeinafriendlymannerthathehopedatleastthatthiswasnotthedayaftermywedding。
\"ThenpeoplesaythatIammarried？\"
\"Itissaideverywhereandbyeverybody。ThemembersoftheCouncilthemselvesbelieveit，andtheyhavegoodreasontobelievethattheyareright。\"
\"Toberightinbelievingsuchathing，theyoughttobecertainofit，andthosegentlemenhavenosuchcertainty。Astheyarenotinfallibleanymorethananyone，exceptGod，Itellyouthattheyaremistaken。Iliketoperformgoodactionsandtogetpleasureformymoney，butnotattheexpenseofmyliberty:Wheneveryouwanttoknowmyaffairs，recollectthatyoucanreceiveinformationaboutthemonlyfromme，andpublicrumourisonlygoodtoamusefools。\"
\"But，\"saidM。Dandolo，\"youspentthenightwiththepersonwhoisrepresentedasyourwife？\"
\"Quitetrue，butIhavenoaccounttogivetoanyonerespectingwhatIhavedonelastnight。Areyounotofmyopinion，M。delaHaye？\"
\"Iwishyouwouldnotaskmyopinion，forIdonotknow。ButImustsaythatpublicrumouroughtnottobedespised。ThedeepaffectionIhaveforyoucausesmetogrieveforwhatthepublicvoicesaysaboutyou。\"
\"HowisitthatthosereportsdonotgrieveM。deBragadin，whohascertainlygreateraffectionformethanyouhave？\"
\"Irespectyou，butIhavelearnedatmyownexpensethatslanderistobefeared。Itissaidthat，inordertogetholdofayounggirlwhowasresidingwithheruncle——aworthypriest，yousubornedawomanwhodeclaredherselftobethegirl’smother，andthusdeceivedtheSupremeCouncil，throughtheauthorityofwhichsheobtainedpossessionofthegirlforyou。ThebailiffsentbytheCouncilswearsthatyouwereinthegondolawiththefalsemotherwhentheyounggirljoinedher。Itissaidthatthedeed，invirtueofwhichyoucausedtheworthyecclesiastic’sfurnituretobecarriedoff，isfalse，andyouareblamedforhavingmadethehighestbodyoftheStateastepping—stonetocrime。Infine，itissaidthat，evenifyouhavemarriedthegirl，andnodoubtofitisentertained，themembersoftheCouncilwillnotbesilentastothefraudulentmeansyouhavehadrecoursetoinordertocarryoutyourintentionssuccessfully。\"
\"Thatisaverylongspeech，\"Isaidtohim，coldly，\"butlearnfrommethatawisemanwhohasheardacriminalaccusationrelatedwithsomanyabsurdparticularsceasestobewisewhenhemakeshimselftheechoofwhathehasheard，foriftheaccusationshouldturnouttobeacalumny，hewouldhimselfbecometheaccompliceoftheslanderer。\"
Afterthatsentence，whichbroughtthebloodtothefaceoftheJesuit，butwhichmyfriendsthoughtverywise，Ientreatedhim，inameaningvoice，tosparehisanxietyaboutme，andtobequitecertainthatIknewthelawsofhonour，andthatIhadjudgmentenoughtotakecareofmyself，andtoletfoultonguessaywhattheylikedaboutme，justasIdidwhenIheardthemspeakillofhim。
Theadventurewasthetalkofthecityforfiveorsixdays，afterwhichitwassoonforgotten。
ButthreemonthshavingelapsedwithoutmyhavingpaidanyvisittoLusia，orhavingansweredtheletterswrittentomebythedamigellaMarchetti，andwithoutsendingherthemoneysheclaimedofme，shemadeuphermindtotakecertainproceedingswhichmighthavehadseriousconsequences，althoughtheyhadnonewhateverintheend。
Oneday，Ignacio，thebailiffofthedreadedtribunaloftheStateinquisitors，presentedhimselfasIwassittingattablewithmyfriends，DelaHaye，andtwootherguests。HeinformedmethattheCavaliereCantarinidalZoffowishedtoseeme，andwouldwaitformethenextmorningatsuchanhourattheMadonnadel’Orto。Irosefromthetableandanswered，withabow，thatIwouldnotfailtoobeythewishesofhisexcellency。Thebailiffthenleftus。
IcouldnotpossiblyguesswhatsuchahighdignitaryofStatecouldwantwithmyhumbleperson，yetthemessagemadeusratheranxious，forCantarinidalZoffowasoneoftheInquisitors，thatistosay，abirdofveryillomen。M。deBragadin，whohadbeenInquisitorwhilehewasCouncillor，andthereforeknewthehabitsofthetribunal，toldmethatIhadnothingtofear。
\"Ignaciowasdressedinprivateclothes，\"headded，\"andthereforehedidnotcomeastheofficialmessengerofthedreadtribunal。
M。Cantariniwishestospeaktoyouonlyasaprivatecitizen，ashesendsyouwordtocallathispalaceandnotatthecourt—house。Heisanelderlyman，strictbutjust，towhomyoumustspeakfranklyandwithoutequivocating，otherwiseyouwouldmakemattersworse。\"
IwaspleasedwithM。deBragadin’sadvice，whichwasofgreatusetome。Icalledattheappointedtime。
Iwasimmediatelyannounced，andIhadnotlongtowait。Ienteredtheroom，andhisexcellency，seatedatatable，examinedmefromheadtofootforoneminutewithoutspeakingtome；hethenrangthebell，andorderedhisservanttointroducethetwoladieswhowerewaitinginthenextroom。Iguessedatoncewhatwasthematter，andfeltnosurprisewhenIsawthewomanMarchettiandherdaughter。
HisexcellencyaskedmeifIknewthem。
\"Imustknowthem，monsignor，asoneofthemwillbecomemywifewhenshehasconvincedmebyhergoodconductthatsheisworthyofthathonour。\"
\"Herconductisgood，sheliveswithhermotheratLusia；youhavedeceivedher。Whydoyoupostponeyourmarriagewithher？Whydoyounotvisither？Youneveranswerherletters，andyouletherbeinwant。\"
\"Icannotmarryher，yourexcellency，beforeIhaveenoughtosupporther。Thatwillcomeinthreeorfouryears，thankstoasituationwhichM。deBragadin，myonlyprotector，promisestoobtainforme。
Untilthenshemustlivehonestly，andsupportherselfbyworking。
IwillonlymarryherwhenIamconvincedofherhonesty，andparticularlywhenIamcertainthatshehasgivenupallintercoursewiththeabbe，hercousininthefourthdegree。Idonotvisitherbecausemyconfessorandmyconscienceforbidmetogotoherhouse。\"
\"Shewishesyoutogiveheralegalpromiseofmarriage，andsustentation。\"
\"Monsignor，Iamundernoobligationtogiveherapromiseofmarriage，andhavingnomeanswhateverIcannotsupporther。Shemustearnherownlivingwithhermother\"
\"Whenshelivedwithhercousin，\"saidhermother，\"sheneverwantedanything，andsheshallgobacktohim。\"
\"IfshereturnstohishouseIshallnottakethetroubleoftakingheroutofhishandsasecondtime，andyourexcellencywillthenseethatIwasrighttodefermymarriagewithheruntilIwasconvincedofherhonesty。\"
Thejudgetoldmethatmypresence，wasnolongernecessary。Itwastheendoftheaffair，andIneverheardanymoreaboutit。Therecitalofthedialoguegreatlyamusedmyfriends。
AtthebeginningoftheCarnivalof1750Iwonaprizeofthreethousandducatsatthelottery。FortunemademethatpresentwhenI
didnotrequireit，forIhadheldthebankduringtheautumn，andhadwon。Itwasatacasinowherenonoblemandaredtopresenthimself，becauseoneofthepartnerswasanofficerintheserviceoftheDukedeMontalegre，theSpanishAmbassador。ThecitizensofVenicefeltillateasewiththepatricians，andthatisalwaysthecaseunderanaristocraticgovernment，becauseequalityexistsinrealityonlybetweenthemembersofsuchagovernment。
AsIintendedtotakeatriptoParis，IplacedonethousandsequinsinM。deBragadin’shands，andwiththatprojectinviewIhadthecouragetopassthecarnivalwithoutriskingmymoneyatthefaro—
table。Ihadtakenashareofone—fourthinthebankofanhonestpatrician，andearlyinLenthehandedmealargesum。
Towardsmid—LentmyfriendBalettireturnedfromMantuatoVenice。
HewasengagedattheSt。MosesTheatreasballet—masterduringtheFairoftheAssumption。HewaswithMarina，buttheydidnotlivetogether。ShemadetheconquestofanEnglishJew，calledMendez，whospentagreatdealofmoneyforher。ThatJewgavemegoodnewsofTherese，whomhehadknowninNaples，andinwhosehandshehadleftsomeofhisspoils。Theinformationpleasedme，andIwasverygladtohavebeenpreventedbyHenriettefromjoiningThereseinNaples，asIhadintended，forIshouldcertainlyhavefalleninlovewithheragain，andGodknowswhattheconsequencesmighthavebeen。
ItwasatthattimethatBavoiswasappointedcaptainintheserviceoftheRepublic；heroserapidlyinhisprofession，asIshallmentionhereafter。
DelaHayeundertooktheeducationofayoungnoblemancalledFelixCalvi，andashorttimeafterwardsheaccompaniedhimtoPoland。I
methimagaininViennathreeyearslater。
IwasmakingmypreparationstogototheFairofReggio，thentoTurin，wherethewholeofItalywascongregatingforthemarriageoftheDukeofSavoywithaprincessofSpain，daughterofPhilipV。，andlastlytoParis，where，MadamelaDauphinebeingpregnant，magnificentpreparationsweremadeintheexpectationofthebirthofaprince。Balettiwaslikewiseonthepointofundertakingthesamejourney。Hewasrecalledbyhisparents，whoweredramaticartists:
hismotherwasthecelebratedSilvia。
BalettiwasengagedattheItalianTheatreinParisasdancerandfirstgentleman。Icouldnotchooseacompanionmoretomytaste，moreagreeable，orinabetterpositiontoprocuremenumerousadvantageousacquaintancesinParis。
Ibadefarewelltomythreeexcellentfriends，promisingtoreturnwithintwoyears。
IleftmybrotherFrancoisinthestudioofSimonetti，thepainterofbattlepieces，knownastheParmesan。IgavehimapromisetothinkofhiminParis，where，atthattimeparticularly，greattalentwasalwayscertainofahighfortune。MyreaderswillseehowIkeptmyword。
IlikewiseleftinVenicemybrotherJean，whohadreturnedtothatcityafterhavingtravelledthroughItalywithGuarienti。HewasonthepointofgoingtoRome，whereheremainedfourteenyearsinthestudioofRaphaelMengs。HeleftRomeforDresdenin1764，wherehediedintheyear1795。
Balettistartedbeforeme，andIleftVenice，tomeethiminReggio，onthe1stofJune，1750。Iwaswellfittedout，wellsuppliedwithmoney，andsurenottowantforany，ifIledaproperlife。Weshallsoonsee，dearreader，whatjudgmentyouwillpassonmyconduct，orratherIshallnotseeit，forIknowthatwhenyouareabletojudge，Ishallnolongercareforyoursentence。
CHAPTERV
IStopatFerrara，WhereIHaveaComicAdventure——MyArrivalinParisPreciselyattwelveo’clockthepeottalandedmeatPontediLagoOscuro，andIimmediatelytookapost—chaisetoreachFerraraintimefordinner。IputupatSt。Mark’sHotel。Iwasfollowingthewaiterupthestairs，whenajoyfuluproar，whichsuddenlyburstfromaroomthedoorofwhichwasopen，mademecurioustoascertainthecauseofsomuchmirth。Ipeepedintotheroom，andsawsometwelvepersons，menandwomen，seatedroundawell—suppliedtable。Itwasaverynaturalthing，andIwasmovingon，whenIwasstoppedbytheexclamation，\"Ah，hereheis！\"utteredbytheprettyvoiceofawoman，andatthesamemoment，thespeaker，leavingthetable，cametomewithopenarmsandembracedme，saying，\"Quick，quick，aseatforhimnearme；takehisluggagetohisroom。\"
Ayoungmancameup，andshesaidtohim，\"Well，Itoldyouhewouldarriveto—day？\"
Shemademesitnearheratthetable，afterIhadbeensalutedbyalltheguestswhohadrisentodomehonour。
\"Mydearcousin，\"shesaid，addressingme，\"youmustbehungry；\"andasshespokeshesqueezedmyfootunderthetable。\"HereismyintendedhusbandwhomIbegtointroducetoyou，aswellasmyfatherandmother—in—law。Theotherguestsroundthetablearefriendsofthefamily。But，mydearcousin，tellmewhymymotherhasnotcomewithyou？\"
AtlastIhadtoopenmylips！
\"Yourmother，mydearcousin，willbehereinthreeorfourdays，atthelatest。\"
Ithoughtthatmynewly—foundcousinwasunknowntome，butwhenI
lookedatherwithmoreattention，IfanciedIrecollectedherfeatures。ShewastheCatinella，adancerofreputation，butIhadneverspokentoherbefore。Ieasilyguessedthatshewasgivingmeanimpromptupartinaplayofherowncomposition，andIwastobea’deuxexmachina’。Whateverissingularandunexpectedhasalwaysattractedme，andasmycousinwaspretty，Ilentmyselfmostwillinglytothejoke，entertainingnodoubtthatshewouldrewardmeinanagreeablemanner。AllIhadtodowastoplaymypartwell，butwithoutimplicatingmyself。Therefore，pretendingtobeveryhungry，IgavehertheopportunityofspeakingandofinformingmebyhintsofwhatIhadtoknow，inordernottomakeblunders。
Understandingthereasonofmyreserve，sheaffordedmetheproofofherquickintelligencebysayingsometimestooneperson，sometimestotheother，everythingitwasnecessaryformetoknow。ThusI
learntthattheweddingcouldnottakeplaceuntilthearrivalofhermother，whowastobringthewardrobeandthediamondsofmycousin。
IwastheprecentorgoingtoTurintocomposethemusicoftheoperawhichwastoberepresentedatthemarriageoftheDukeofSavoy。
Thislastdiscoverypleasedmegreatly，becauseIsawthatIshouldhavenodifficultyintakingmydeparturethenextmorning，andI
begantoenjoythepartIhadtoplay。Yet，ifIhadnotreckoneduponthereward，Imightverywellhaveinformedthehonourablecompanythatmyfalsecousinwasmad，but，althoughCatinellawasverynearthirty，shewasveryprettyandcelebratedforherintrigues；thatwasenough，andshecouldturnmeroundherlittlefinger。
Thefuturemother—in—lawwasseatedopposite，andtodomehonourshefilledaglassandofferedittome。Alreadyidentifiedwithmypartinthecomedy，Iputforthmyhandtotaketheglass，butseeingthatmyhandwassomewhatbent，shesaidtome，\"Whatisthematterwithyourhand，sir？\"
\"Nothingserious，madam；onlyaslightsprainwhichalittlerestwillsooncure。\"
Atthesewords，Catinella，laughingheartily，saidthatsheregrettedtheaccidentbecauseitwoulddepriveherfriendsofthepleasuretheywouldhaveenjoyedinhearingmeplaytheharpsichord。
\"Iamgladtofinditalaughingmatter，cousin。\"
\"Ilaugh，becauseitremindsmeofasprainedanklewhichIoncefeignedtohaveinordernottodance。\"
Aftercoffee，themother—in—law，whoevidentlyunderstoodwhatwasproper，saidthatmostlikelymycousinwantedtotalkwithmeonfamilymatters，andthatweoughttobeleftalone。
Everyoneoftheguestslefttheroom。
AssoonasIwasalonewithherinmyroom，whichwasnexttoherownshethrewherselfonasofa，andgavewaytoamostimmoderatefitoflaughter。
\"AlthoughIonlyknowyoubyname，\"shesaidtome，\"Ihaveentireconfidenceinyou，butyouwilldowelltogoawayto—morrow。Ihavebeenherefortwomonthswithoutanymoney。Ihavenothingbutafewdressesandsomelinen，whichIshouldhavebeencompelledtoselltodefraymyexpensesifIhadnotbeenluckyenoughtoinspirethesonofthelandlordwiththedeepestlove。Ihaveflatteredhispassionbypromisingtobecomehiswife，andtobringhimasamarriageportiontwentythousandcrowns’worthofdiamondswhichIamsupposedtohaveinVenice，andwhichmymotherisexpectedtobringwithher。
Butmymotherhasnothingandknowsnothingoftheaffair，thereforesheisnotlikelytoleaveVenice。\"
\"But，tellme，lovelymadcap，whatwillbetheendofthisextravaganza？Iamafraiditwilltakeatragicturnatthelast。\"
\"Youaremistaken；itwillremainacomedy，andaveryamusingone，too。IamexpectingeveryhourthearrivalofCountHolstein，brotheroftheElectorofMainz。HehaswrittentomefromFrankfort；hehasleftthatcity，andmustbythistimehavereachedVenice。HewilltakemetotheFairofReggio，andifmyintendedtakesitintohisheadtobeangry，thecountwillthrashhimandpaymybill，butIamdeterminedthatheshallbeneitherthrashednorpaid。AsIgoaway，IhaveonlytowhisperinhisearthatIwillcertainlyreturn，anditwillbeallright。IknowmypromisetobecomehiswifeassoonasIcomebackwillmakehimhappy。\"
\"That’sallverywell！YouareaswittyasacousinofSatan，butI
shallnotwaityourreturntomarryyou；ourweddingmusttakeplaceatonce。\"
\"Whatfolly！Well，waituntilthisevening。\"
\"Notabitofit，forIcanalmostfancyIhearthecount’scarriage。
Ifheshouldnotarrive，wecancontinuethesportduringthenight。\"
\"Doyouloveme？\"
\"Todistraction！butwhatdoesitmatter？However，yourexcellentcomedyrendersyouworthyofadoration。Now，supposewedonotwasteourtime。\"
\"Youareright:itisanepisode，andallthemoreagreeableforbeingimpromptu。\"
IcanwellrecollectthatIfounditadelightfulepisode。Towardseveningallthefamilyjoinedusagain，awalkwasproposed，andwewereonthepointofgoingout，whenacarriagedrawnbysixpost—
horsesnoisilyenteredtheyard。Catinellalookedthroughthewindow，anddesiredtobeleftalone，sayingthatitwasaprincewhohadcometoseeher。Everybodywentaway，shepushedmeintomyroomandlockedmein。Iwenttothewindow，andsawanoblemanfourtimesasbigasmyselfgettingoutofthecarriage。Hecameupstairs，enteredtheroomoftheintendedbride，andallthatwaslefttomewastheconsolationofhavingseizedfortunebytheforelock，thepleasureofhearingtheirconversation，andaconvenientview，throughacreviceinthepartition，ofwhatCatinellacontrivedtodowiththatheavylumpofflesh。Butatlastthestupidamusementweariedme，foritlastedfivehours，whichwereemployedinamorouscaresses，inpackingCatinella’srags，inloadingthemonthecarriage，intakingsupper，andindrinkingnumerousbumpersofRhenishwine。Atmidnightthecountleftthehotel，carryingawaywithhimthebelovedmistressofthelandlord’sson。
Nooneduringthoselonghourshadcometomyroom，andIhadnotcalled。Iwasafraidofbeingdiscovered，andIdidnotknowhowfartheGermanprincewouldhavebeenpleasedifhehadfoundoutthathehadanindiscreetwitnessoftheheavyandpowerlessdemonstrationsofhistenderness，whichwereacredittoneitheroftheactors，andwhichsuppliedmewithamplefoodforthoughtsuponthemiseriesofmankind。
Afterthedepartureoftheheroine，catchingthroughthecreviceaglimpseoftheabandonedlover，Icalledouttohimtounlockmydoor。Thepoorsillyfellowtoldmepiteouslythat，Catinellahavingtakenthekeywithher，itwouldbenecessarytobreakthedooropen。
Ibeggedhimtohaveitdoneatonce，becauseIwashungry。AssoonasIwasoutofmyprisonIhadmysupper，andtheunfortunateloverkeptmecompany。HetoldmethatCatinellahadfoundamomenttopromisehimthatshewouldreturnwithinsixweeks，thatshewassheddingtearsingivinghimthatassurance，andthatshehadkissedhimwithgreattenderness。
\"Hastheprincepaidherexpenses？\"
\"Notatall。Wewouldnothaveallowedhimtodoit，evenifhehadoffered。Myfuturewifewouldhavefeltoffended，foryoucanhavenoideaofthedelicacyofherfeelings。\"
\"Whatdoesyourfathersayofherdeparture？\"
\"Myfatheralwaysseestheworstsideofeverything；hesaysthatshewillnevercomeback，andmymothershareshisopinionratherthanmine。Butyou，signormaestro，whatdoyouthink？\"
\"Thatifshehaspromisedtoreturn，shewillbesuretokeepherword。\"
\"Ofcourse；forifshedidnotmeantocomeback，shewouldnothavegivenmeherpromise。\"
\"Precisely；Icallthatagoodargument。\"
Ihadformysupperwhatwasleftofthemealpreparedbythecount’scook，andIdrankabottleofexcellentRhenishwinewhichCatinellahadjuggledawaytotreatherintendedhusband，andwhichtheworthyfellowthoughtcouldnothaveabetterdestinationthantotreathisfuturecousin。AftersupperItookpost—horsesandcontinuedmyjourney，assuringtheunhappy，forlornloverthatIwoulddoallI
couldtopersuademycousintocomebackverysoon。Iwantedtopaymybill，butherefusedtoreceiveanymoney。IreachedBolognaafewminutesafterCatinella，andputupatthesamehotel，whereI
foundanopportunityoftellingherallherloverhadsaid。I
arrivedinReggiobeforeher，butIcouldnotspeaktoherinthatcity，forshewasalwaysinthecompanyofherpotentandimpotentlord。Afterthefair，duringwhichnothingofimportanceoccurredtome，IleftReggiowithmyfriendBalettiandweproceededtoTurin，whichIwantedtosee，forthefirsttimeIhadgonetothatcitywithHenrietteIhadstoppedonlylongenoughtochangehorses。
IfoundeverythingbeautifulinTurin，thecity，thecourt，thetheatre，andthewomen，includingtheDuchessofSavoy，butIcouldnothelplaughingwhenIwastoldthatthepoliceofthecitywasveryefficient，forthestreetswerefullofbeggars。Thatpolice，however，wasthespecialcareoftheking，whowasveryintelligent；
ifwearetobelievehistory，butIconfessthatIlaughedwhenIsawtheridiculousfaceofthatsovereign。
Ihadneverseenakingbeforeinmylife，andafoolishideamademesupposethatakingmustbepreeminent——averyrarebeing——byhisbeautyandthemajestyofhisappearance，andineverythingsuperiortotherestofmen。ForayoungRepublicanendowedwithreason，myideawasnot，afterall，soveryfoolish，butIverysoongotridofitwhenIsawthatKingofSardinia，ugly，hump—backed，moroseandvulgareveninhismanners。Ithenrealizedthatitwaspossibletobeakingwithoutbeingentirelyaman。
IsawL’AstruaandGafarello，thosetwomagnificentsingersonthestage，andIadmiredthedancingofLaGeofroi，whomarriedatthattimeaworthydancernamedBodin。
DuringmystayinTurin，noamorousfancydisturbedthepeaceofmysoul，exceptanaccidentwhichhappenedtomewiththedaughterofmywasherwoman，andwhichincreasedmyknowledgeinphysicsinasingularmanner。Thatgirlwasverypretty，and，withoutbeingwhatmightbecalledinlovewithher，Iwishedtoobtainherfavours。
Piquedatmynotbeingabletoobtainanappointmentfromher，I
contrivedonedaytocatchheratthebottomofabackstaircasebywhichsheusedtocometomyroom，and，Imustconfess，withtheintentionofusingalittleviolence，ifnecessary。
HavingconcealedmyselfforthatpurposeatthetimeIexpectedher，Igotholdofherbysurprise，and，halfbypersuasion，halfbytherapidityofmyattack，shewasbroughttoarightposition，andI
lostnotimeinengaginginaction。Butatthefirstmovementoftheconnectionaloudexplosionsomewhatcooledmyardour，themoresothattheyounggirlcoveredherfacewithherhandsasifshewishedtohidehershame。However，encouragingherwithalovingkiss，I
beganagain。But，areport，loudereventhanthefirst，strikesatthesamemomentmyearandmynose。Icontinue；athird，afourthreport，and，tomakealongmattershort，eachmovementgivesanexplosionwithasmuchregularityasaconductormakingthetimeforapieceofmusic！
Thisextraordinaryphenomenon，theconfusionofthepoorgirl，ourposition——everything，infact，struckmeassocomical，thatIburstintothemostimmoderatelaughter，whichcompelledmetogiveuptheundertaking。Ashamedandconfused，theyounggirlranaway，andI
didnothingtohinderher。Afterthatsheneverhadthecouragetopresentherselfbeforeme。Iremainedseatedonthestairsforaquarterofanhouraftershehadleftme，amusedatthefunnycharacterofascenewhichevennowexcitesmymirth。Isupposethattheyounggirlwasindebtedforhervirtuetothatsingulardisease，andmostlikely，ifitwerecommontoallthefairsex，therewouldbefewergallantwomen，unlesswehaddifferentorgans；fortopayforonemomentofenjoymentattheexpensebothofthehearingandofthesmellistogivetoohighaprice。
Baletti，beinginahurrytoreachParis，wheregreatpreparationswerebeingmadeforthebirthofaDukeofBurgundy——fortheduchesswasnearthetimeofherdelivery——easilypersuadedmetoshortenmystayinTurin。Wethereforeleftthatcity，andinfivedayswearrivedatLyons，whereIstayedaboutaweek。
Lyonsisaveryfinecityinwhichatthattimetherewerescarcelythreeorfournoblehousesopenedtostrangers；but，incompensation，thereweremorethanahundredhospitableonesbelongingtomerchants，manufacturers，andcommissionagents，amongstwhomwastobefoundanexcellentsocietyremarkableforeasymanners，politeness，frankness，andgoodstyle，withouttheabsurdpridetobemetwithamongstthenobilityintheprovinces，withveryfewhonourableexceptions。ItistruethatthestandardofgoodmannersisbelowthatofParis，butonesoongetsaccustomedtoit。ThewealthofLyonsarisesfromgoodtasteandlowprices，andFashionisthegoddesstowhomthatcityowesitsprosperity。Fashionalterseveryyear，andthestuff，towhichthefashionofthedaygivesavalueequal，saytothirty，isthenextyearreducedtofifteenortwenty，andthenitissenttoforeigncountrieswhereitisboughtupasanovelty。