TheremarksIhavemadeonfilialloveandfraternalaffectionareapplicabletoallthepassionswhichemanatespontaneouslyfromhumannatureitself。Ifacertainmodeofthoughtorfeelingistheresultofsomepeculiarconditionoflife，whenthatconditionisalterednothingwhateverremainsofthethoughtorfeeling。Thusalawmaybindtwomembersofthecommunityverycloselytooneanother;butthatlawbeingabolished，theystandasunder。Nothingwasmorestrictthanthetiewhichunitedthevassaltothelordunderthefeudalsystem;
atthepresentdaythetwomenknownoteachother;thefear，thegratitude，andtheaffectionwhichformerlyconnectedthemhavevanished，andnotavestigeofthetieremains。Such，however，isnotthecasewiththosefeelingswhicharenaturaltomankind。
Wheneveralawattemptstotutorthesefeelingsinanyparticularmanner，itseldomfailstoweakenthem;byattemptingtoaddtotheirintensity，itrobsthemofsomeoftheirelements，fortheyareneverstrongerthanwhenlefttothemselves。
Democracy，whichdestroysorobscuresalmostalltheoldconventionalrulesofsociety，andwhichpreventsmenfromreadilyassentingtonewones，entirelyeffacesmostofthefeelingstowhichtheseconventionalruleshavegivenrise;butitonlymodifiessomeothers，andfrequentlyimpartstothemadegreeofenergyandsweetnessunknownbefore。Perhapsitisnotimpossibletocondenseintoasinglepropositionthewholemeaningofthischapter，andofseveralothersthatprecededit。
Democracyloosenssocialties，butitdrawsthetiesofnaturemoretight;itbringskindredmorecloselytogether，whilstitplacesthevariousmembersofthecommunitymorewidelyapart。
ChapterIX:EducationOfYoungWomenInTheUnitedStatesNofreecommunitieseverexistedwithoutmorals;and，asI
observedintheformerpartofthiswork，moralsaretheworkofwoman。Consequently，whateveraffectstheconditionofwomen，theirhabitsandtheiropinions，hasgreatpoliticalimportanceinmyeyes。AmongstalmostallProtestantnationsyoungwomenarefarmorethemistressesoftheirownactionsthantheyareinCatholiccountries。ThisindependenceisstillgreaterinProtestantcountries，likeEngland，whichhaveretainedoracquiredtherightofself—government;thespiritoffreedomistheninfusedintothedomesticcirclebypoliticalhabitsandbyreligiousopinions。IntheUnitedStatesthedoctrinesofProtestantismarecombinedwithgreatpoliticalfreedomandamostdemocraticstateofsociety;andnowhereareyoungwomensurrenderedsoearlyorsocompletelytotheirownguidance。
LongbeforeanAmericangirlarrivesattheageofmarriage，heremancipationfrommaternalcontrolbegins;shehasscarcelyceasedtobeachildwhenshealreadythinksforherself，speakswithfreedom，andactsonherownimpulse。Thegreatsceneoftheworldisconstantlyopentoherview;farfromseekingconcealment，itiseverydaydisclosedtohermorecompletely，andsheistaughttosurveyitwithafirmandcalmgaze。Thusthevicesanddangersofsocietyareearlyrevealedtoher;assheseesthemclearly，sheviewsthemwithoutillusions，andbravesthemwithoutfear;forsheisfullofrelianceonherownstrength，andherrelianceseemstobesharedbyallwhoareabouther。AnAmericangirlscarcelyeverdisplaysthatvirginalbloominthemidstofyoungdesires，orthatinnocentandingenuousgracewhichusuallyattendstheEuropeanwomaninthetransitionfromgirlhoodtoyouth。ItisrarelythatanAmericanwomanatanyagedisplayschildishtimidityorignorance。LiketheyoungwomenofEurope，sheseekstoplease，butsheknowspreciselythecostofpleasing。Ifshedoesnotabandonherselftoevil，atleastsheknowsthatitexists;andsheisremarkableratherforpurityofmannersthanforchastityofmind。Ihavebeenfrequentlysurprised，andalmostfrightened，atthesingularaddressandhappyboldnesswithwhichyoungwomeninAmericacontrivetomanagetheirthoughtsandtheirlanguageamidstallthedifficultiesofstimulatingconversation;aphilosopherwouldhavestumbledateverystepalongthenarrowpathwhichtheytrodwithoutaccidentsandwithouteffort。Itiseasyindeedtoperceivethat，evenamidsttheindependenceofearlyyouth，anAmericanwomanisalwaysmistressofherself;sheindulgesinallpermittedpleasures，withoutyieldingherselfuptoanyofthem;
andherreasonneverallowsthereinsofself—guidancetodrop，thoughitoftenseemstoholdthemloosely。
InFrance，whereremnantsofeveryagearestillsostrangelymingledintheopinionsandtastesofthepeople，womencommonlyreceiveareserved，retired，andalmostcloistraleducation，astheydidinaristocratictimes;andthentheyaresuddenlyabandoned，withoutaguideandwithoutassistance，inthemidstofalltheirregularitiesinseparablefromdemocraticsociety。TheAmericansaremoreconsistent。Theyhavefoundoutthatinademocracytheindependenceofindividualscannotfailtobeverygreat，youthpremature，tastesill—restrained，customsfleeting，publicopinionoftenunsettledandpowerless，paternalauthorityweak，andmaritalauthoritycontested。Underthesecircumstances，believingthattheyhadlittlechanceofrepressinginwomanthemostvehementpassionsofthehumanheart，theyheldthatthesurerwaywastoteachhertheartofcombatingthosepassionsforherself。Astheycouldnotpreventhervirtuefrombeingexposedtofrequentdanger，theydeterminedthatsheshouldknowhowbesttodefendit;andmorereliancewasplacedonthefreevigorofherwillthanonsafeguardswhichhavebeenshakenoroverthrown。Instead，then，ofinculcatingmistrustofherself，theyconstantlyseektoenhancetheirconfidenceinherownstrengthofcharacter。Asitisneitherpossiblenordesirabletokeepayoungwomaninperpetualorcompleteignorance，theyhastentogiveheraprecociousknowledgeonallsubjects。Farfromhidingthecorruptionsoftheworldfromher，theypreferthatsheshouldseethematonceandtrainherselftoshunthem;andtheyholditofmoreimportancetoprotectherconductthantobeover—scrupulousofherinnocence。
AlthoughtheAmericansareaveryreligiouspeople，theydonotrelyonreligionalonetodefendthevirtueofwoman;theyseektoarmherreasonalso。Inthistheyhavefollowedthesamemethodasinseveralotherrespects;theyfirstmakethemostvigorouseffortstobringindividualindependencetoexerciseapropercontroloveritself，andtheydonotcallintheaidofreligionuntiltheyhavereachedtheutmostlimitsofhumanstrength。Iamawarethataneducationofthiskindisnotwithoutdanger;Iamsensiblethatittendstoinvigoratethejudgmentattheexpenseoftheimagination，andtomakecoldandvirtuouswomeninsteadofaffectionatewivesandagreeablecompanionstoman。Societymaybemoretranquilandbetterregulated，butdomesticlifehasoftenfewercharms。These，however，aresecondaryevils，whichmaybebravedforthesakeofhigherinterests。Atthestageatwhichwearenowarrivedthetimeforchoosingisnolongerwithinourcontrol;ademocraticeducationisindispensabletoprotectwomenfromthedangerswithwhichdemocraticinstitutionsandmannerssurroundthem。
ChapterX:TheYoungWomanInTheCharacterOfAWifeInAmericatheindependenceofwomanisirrevocablylostinthebondsofmatrimony:ifanunmarriedwomanislessconstrainedtherethanelsewhere，awifeissubjectedtostricterobligations。Theformermakesherfather’shouseanabodeoffreedomandofpleasure;thelatterlivesinthehomeofherhusbandasifitwereacloister。Yetthesetwodifferentconditionsoflifeareperhapsnotsocontraryasmaybesupposed，anditisnaturalthattheAmericanwomenshouldpassthroughtheonetoarriveattheother。
Religiouspeoplesandtradingnationsentertainpeculiarlyseriousnotionsofmarriage:theformerconsidertheregularityofwoman’slifeasthebestpledgeandmostcertainsignofthepurityofhermorals;thelatterregarditasthehighestsecurityfortheorderandprosperityofthehousehold。TheAmericansareatthesametimeapuritanicalpeopleandacommercialnation:theirreligiousopinions，aswellastheirtradinghabits，consequentlyleadthemtorequiremuchabnegationonthepartofwoman，andaconstantsacrificeofherpleasurestoherdutieswhichisseldomdemandedofherinEurope。ThusintheUnitedStatestheinexorableopinionofthepubliccarefullycircumscribeswomanwithinthenarrowcircleofdomesticinterestandduties，andforbidshertostepbeyondit。
UponherentranceintotheworldayoungAmericanwomanfindsthesenotionsfirmlyestablished;sheseestheruleswhicharederivedfromthem;sheisnotslowtoperceivethatshecannotdepartforaninstantfromtheestablishedusagesofhercontemporaries，withoutputtinginjeopardyherpeaceofmind，herhonor，nayevenhersocialexistence;andshefindstheenergyrequiredforsuchanactofsubmissioninthefirmnessofherunderstandingandinthevirilehabitswhichhereducationhasgivenher。Itmaybesaidthatshehaslearnedbytheuseofherindependencetosurrenderitwithoutastruggleandwithoutamurmurwhenthetimecomesformakingthesacrifice。ButnoAmericanwomanfallsintothetoilsofmatrimonyasintoasnareheldouttohersimplicityandignorance。Shehasbeentaughtbeforehandwhatisexpectedofher，andvoluntarilyandfreelydoessheenteruponthisengagement。Shesupportshernewconditionwithcourage，becauseshechoseit。AsinAmericapaternaldisciplineisveryrelaxedandtheconjugaltieverystrict，ayoungwomandoesnotcontractthelatterwithoutconsiderablecircumspectionandapprehension。Precociousmarriagesarerare。ThusAmericanwomendonotmarryuntiltheirunderstandingsareexercisedandripened;whereasinothercountriesmostwomengenerallyonlybegintoexerciseandtoripentheirunderstandingsaftermarriage。
Ibynomeanssuppose，however，thatthegreatchangewhichtakesplaceinallthehabitsofwomenintheUnitedStates，assoonastheyaremarried，oughtsolelytobeattributedtotheconstraintofpublicopinion:itisfrequentlyimposeduponthemselvesbythesoleeffortoftheirownwill。Whenthetimeforchoosingahusbandisarrived，thatcoldandsternreasoningpowerwhichhasbeeneducatedandinvigoratedbythefreeobservationoftheworld，teachesanAmericanwomanthataspiritoflevityandindependenceinthebondsofmarriageisaconstantsubjectofannoyance，notofpleasure;ittellsherthattheamusementsofthegirlcannotbecometherecreationsofthewife，andthatthesourcesofamarriedwoman’shappinessareinthehomeofherhusband。Assheclearlydiscernsbeforehandtheonlyroadwhichcanleadtodomestichappiness，sheentersuponitatonce，andfollowsittotheendwithoutseekingtoturnback。
ThesamestrengthofpurposewhichtheyoungwivesofAmericadisplay，inbendingthemselvesatonceandwithoutrepiningtotheausteredutiesoftheirnewcondition，isnolessmanifestinallthegreattrialsoftheirlives。InnocountryintheworldareprivatefortunesmoreprecariousthanintheUnitedStates。Itisnotuncommonforthesameman，inthecourseofhislife，toriseandsinkagainthroughallthegradeswhichleadfromopulencetopoverty。Americanwomensupportthesevicissitudeswithcalmandunquenchableenergy:itwouldseemthattheirdesirescontract，aseasilyastheyexpand，withtheirfortunes。*a[Footnotea:SeeAppendixS。]
Thegreaterpartoftheadventurerswhomigrateeveryyeartopeoplethewesternwilds，belong，asIobservedintheformerpartofthiswork，totheoldAnglo—AmericanraceoftheNorthernStates。Manyofthesemen，whorushsoboldlyonwardsinpursuitofwealth，werealreadyintheenjoymentofacompetencyintheirownpartofthecountry。Theytaketheirwivesalongwiththem，andmakethemsharethecountlessperilsandprivationswhichalwaysattendthecommencementoftheseexpeditions。Ihaveoftenmet，evenonthevergeofthewilderness，withyoungwomen，whoafterhavingbeenbroughtupamidstallthecomfortsofthelargetownsofNewEngland，hadpassed，almostwithoutanyintermediatestage，fromthewealthyabodeoftheirparentstoacomfortlesshovelinaforest。Fever，solitude，andatediouslifehadnotbrokenthespringsoftheircourage。Theirfeatureswereimpairedandfaded，buttheirlookswerefirm:theyappearedtobeatoncesadandresolute。IdonotdoubtthattheseyoungAmericanwomenhadamassed，intheeducationoftheirearlyyears，thatinwardstrengthwhichtheydisplayedunderthesecircumstances。Theearlycultureofthegirlmaystillthereforebetraced，intheUnitedStates，undertheaspectofmarriage:
herpartischanged，herhabitsaredifferent，buthercharacteristhesame。
BookThree—ChaptersXI—XIV
ChapterXI:ThatTheEqualityOfConditionsContributesToTheMaintenanceOfGoodMoralsInAmericaSomephilosophersandhistorianshavesaid，orhavehinted，thatthestrictnessoffemalemoralitywasincreasedordiminishedsimplybythedistanceofacountryfromtheequator。
Thissolutionofthedifficultywasaneasyone;andnothingwasrequiredbutaglobeandapairofcompassestosettleinaninstantoneofthemostdifficultproblemsintheconditionofmankind。ButIamnotawarethatthisprincipleofthematerialistsissupportedbyfacts。Thesamenationshavebeenchasteordissoluteatdifferentperiodsoftheirhistory;thestrictnessorthelaxityoftheirmoralsdependedthereforeonsomevariablecause，notonlyonthenaturalqualitiesoftheircountry，whichwereinvariable。Idonotdenythatincertainclimatesthepassionswhichareoccasionedbythemutualattractionofthesexesarepeculiarlyintense;butIamofopinionthatthisnaturalintensitymayalwaysbeexcitedorrestrainedbytheconditionofsocietyandbypoliticalinstitutions。
AlthoughthetravellerswhohavevisitedNorthAmericadifferonagreatnumberofpoints，theyallagreeinremarkingthatmoralsarefarmorestricttherethanelsewhere。ItisevidentthatonthispointtheAmericansareverysuperiortotheirprogenitorstheEnglish。Asuperficialglanceatthetwonationswillestablishthefact。InEngland，asinallothercountriesofEurope，publicmaliceisconstantlyattackingthefrailtiesofwomen。Philosophersandstatesmenareheardtodeplorethatmoralsarenotsufficientlystrict，andtheliteraryproductionsofthecountryconstantlyleadonetosupposeso。InAmericaallbooks，novelsnotexcepted，supposewomentobechaste，andnoonethinksofrelatingaffairsofgallantry。NodoubtthisgreatregularityofAmericanmoralsoriginatespartlyinthecountry，intheraceofthepeople，andintheirreligion:
butallthesecauses，whichoperateelsewhere，donotsufficetoaccountforit;recoursemustbehadtosomespecialreason。
Thisreasonappearstometobetheprincipleofequalityandtheinstitutionsderivedfromit。Equalityofconditionsdoesnotofitselfengenderregularityofmorals，butitunquestionablyfacilitatesandincreasesit。*a[Footnotea:SeeAppendixT。]
Amongstaristocraticnationsbirthandfortunefrequentlymaketwosuchdifferentbeingsofmanandwoman，thattheycanneverbeunitedtoeachother。Theirpassionsdrawthemtogether，buttheconditionofsociety，andthenotionssuggestedbyit，preventthemfromcontractingapermanentandostensibletie。Thenecessaryconsequenceisagreatnumberoftransientandclandestineconnections。Naturesecretlyavengesherselffortheconstraintimposeduponherbythelawsofman。Thisisnotsomuchthecasewhentheequalityofconditionshassweptawayalltheimaginary，orthereal，barrierswhichseparatedmanfromwoman。Nogirlthenbelievesthatshecannotbecomethewifeofthemanwholovesher;andthisrendersallbreachesofmoralitybeforemarriageveryuncommon:for，whateverbethecredulityofthepassions，awomanwillhardlybeabletopersuadeherselfthatsheisbeloved，whenherloverisperfectlyfreetomarryheranddoesnot。
Thesamecauseoperates，thoughmoreindirectly，onmarriedlife。Nothingbetterservestojustifyanillicitpassion，eithertothemindsofthosewhohaveconceiveditortotheworldwhichlookson，thancompulsoryoraccidentalmarriages。*bInacountryinwhichawomanisalwaysfreetoexerciseherpowerofchoosing，andinwhicheducationhaspreparedhertochooserightly，publicopinionisinexorabletoherfaults。TherigoroftheAmericansarisesinpartfromthiscause。Theyconsidermarriagesasacovenantwhichisoftenonerous，buteveryconditionofwhichthepartiesarestrictlyboundtofulfil，becausetheyknewallthoseconditionsbeforehand，andwereperfectlyfreenottohavecontractedthem。
[Footnoteb:TheliteratureofEuropesufficientlycorroboratesthisremark。WhenaEuropeanauthorwishestodepictinaworkofimaginationanyofthesegreatcatastrophesinmatrimonywhichsofrequentlyoccuramongstus，hetakescaretobespeakthecompassionofthereaderbybringingbeforehimill—assortedorcompulsorymarriages。Althoughhabitualtolerancehaslongsincerelaxedourmorals，anauthorcouldhardlysucceedininterestingusinthemisfortunesofhischaracters，ifhedidnotfirstpalliatetheirfaults。Thisartificeseldomfails:thedailysceneswewitnessprepareuslongbeforehandtobeindulgent。
ButAmericanwriterscouldneverrenderthesepalliationsprobabletotheirreaders;theircustomsandlawsareopposedtoit;andastheydespairofrenderinglevityofconductpleasing，theyceasetodepictit。ThisisoneofthecausestowhichmustbeattributedthesmallnumberofnovelspublishedintheUnitedStates。]
Theverycircumstanceswhichrendermatrimonialfidelitymoreobligatoryalsorenderitmoreeasy。Inaristocraticcountriestheobjectofmarriageisrathertounitepropertythanpersons;hencethehusbandissometimesatschoolandthewifeatnursewhentheyarebetrothed。Itcannotbewonderedatiftheconjugaltiewhichholdsthefortunesofthepairunitedallowstheirheartstorove;thisisthenaturalresultofthenatureofthecontract。When，onthecontrary，amanalwayschoosesawifeforhimself，withoutanyexternalcoercionorevenguidance，itisgenerallyaconformityoftastesandopinionswhichbringsamanandawomantogether，andthissameconformitykeepsandfixestheminclosehabitsofintimacy。
Ourforefathershadconceivedaverystrangenotiononthesubjectofmarriage:astheyhadremarkedthatthesmallnumberoflove—matcheswhichoccurredintheirtimealmostalwaysturnedoutill，theyresolutelyinferredthatitwasexceedinglydangeroustolistentothedictatesoftheheartonthesubject。
Accidentappearedtothemtobeabetterguidethanchoice。Yetitwasnotverydifficulttoperceivethattheexampleswhichtheywitnesseddidinfactprovenothingatall。Forinthefirstplace，ifdemocraticnationsleaveawomanatlibertytochooseherhusband，theytakecaretogivehermindsufficientknowledge，andherwillsufficientstrength，tomakesoimportantachoice:whereastheyoungwomenwho，amongstaristocraticnations，furtivelyelopefromtheauthorityoftheirparentstothrowthemselvesoftheirownaccordintothearmsofmenwhomtheyhavehadneithertimetoknow，norabilitytojudgeof，aretotallywithoutthosesecurities。Itisnotsurprisingthattheymakeabaduseoftheirfreedomofactionthefirsttimetheyavailthemselvesofit;northattheyfallintosuchcruelmistakes，when，nothavingreceivedademocraticeducation，theychoosetomarryinconformitytodemocraticcustoms。Butthisisnotall。Whenamanandwomanarebentuponmarriageinspiteofthedifferencesofanaristocraticstateofsociety，thedifficultiestobeovercomeareenormous。Havingbrokenorrelaxedthebondsoffilialobedience，theyhavethentoemancipatethemselvesbyafinaleffortfromtheswayofcustomandthetyrannyofopinion;andwhenatlengththeyhavesucceededinthisarduoustask，theystandestrangedfromtheirnaturalfriendsandkinsmen:theprejudicetheyhavecrossedseparatesthemfromall，andplacestheminasituationwhichsoonbreakstheircourageandsourstheirhearts。If，then，acouplemarriedinthismannerarefirstunhappyandafterwardscriminal，itoughtnottobeattributedtothefreedomoftheirchoice，butrathertotheirlivinginacommunityinwhichthisfreedomofchoiceisnotadmitted。
Moreoveritshouldnotbeforgottenthatthesameeffortwhichmakesamanviolentlyshakeoffaprevailingerror，commonlyimpelshimbeyondtheboundsofreason;that，todaretodeclarewar，inhoweverjustacause，againsttheopinionofone’sageandcountry，aviolentandadventurousspiritisrequired，andthatmenofthischaracterseldomarriveathappinessorvirtue，whateverbethepaththeyfollow。Andthis，itmaybeobservedbytheway，isthereasonwhyinthemostnecessaryandrighteousrevolutions，itissoraretomeetwithvirtuousormoderaterevolutionarycharacters。Thereisthennojustgroundforsurpriseifaman，whoinanageofaristocracychoosestoconsultnothingbuthisownopinionandhisowntasteinthechoiceofawife，soonfindsthatinfractionsofmoralityanddomesticwretchednessinvadehishousehold:butwhenthissamelineofactionisinthenaturalandordinarycourseofthings，whenitissanctionedbyparentalauthorityandbackedbypublicopinion，itcannotbedoubtedthattheinternalpeaceoffamilieswillbeincreasedbyit，andconjugalfidelitymorerigidlyobserved。
Almostallmenindemocraciesareengagedinpublicorprofessionallife;andontheotherhandthelimitedextentofcommonincomesobligesawifetoconfineherselftothehouse，inordertowatchinpersonandverycloselyoverthedetailsofdomesticeconomy。Allthesedistinctandcompulsoryoccupationsaresomanynaturalbarriers，which，bykeepingthetwosexesasunder，renderthesolicitationsoftheonelessfrequentandlessardent—theresistanceoftheothermoreeasy。
Notindeedthattheequalityofconditionscaneversucceedinmakingmenchaste，butitmayimpartalessdangerouscharactertotheirbreachesofmorality。Asnoonehastheneithersufficienttimeoropportunitytoassailavirtuearmedinself—defence，therewillbeatthesametimeagreatnumberofcourtesansandagreatnumberofvirtuouswomen。Thisstateofthingscauseslamentablecasesofindividualhardship，butitdoesnotpreventthebodyofsocietyfrombeingstrongandalert:
itdoesnotdestroyfamilyties，orenervatethemoralsofthenation。Societyisendangerednotbythegreatprofligacyofafew，butbylaxityofmoralsamongstall。Intheeyesofalegislator，prostitutionislesstobedreadedthanintrigue。
Thetumultuousandconstantlyharassedlifewhichequalitymakesmenlead，notonlydistractsthemfromthepassionoflove，bydenyingthemtimetoindulgeinit，butitdivertsthemfromitbyanothermoresecretbutmorecertainroad。Allmenwholiveindemocraticagesmoreorlesscontractthewaysofthinkingofthemanufacturingandtradingclasses;theirmindstakeaserious，deliberate，andpositiveturn;theyareapttorelinquishtheideal，inordertopursuesomevisibleandproximateobject，whichappearstobethenaturalandnecessaryaimoftheirdesires。Thustheprincipleofequalitydoesnotdestroytheimagination，butlowersitsflighttotheleveloftheearth。Nomenarelessaddictedtoreveriethanthecitizensofademocracy;andfewofthemareeverknowntogivewaytothoseidleandsolitarymeditationswhichcommonlyprecedeandproducethegreatemotionsoftheheart。Itistruetheyattachgreatimportancetoprocuringforthemselvesthatsortofdeep，regular，andquietaffectionwhichconstitutesthecharmandsafeguardoflife，buttheyarenotapttorunafterthoseviolentandcapricioussourcesofexcitementwhichdisturbandabridgeit。
IamawarethatallthisisonlyapplicableinitsfullextenttoAmerica，andcannotatpresentbeextendedtoEurope。
Inthecourseofthelasthalf—century，whilstlawsandcustomshaveimpelledseveralEuropeannationswithunexampledforcetowardsdemocracy，wehavenothadoccasiontoobservethattherelationsofmanandwomanhavebecomemoreorderlyormorechaste。Insomeplacestheveryreversemaybedetected:someclassesaremorestrict—thegeneralmoralityofthepeopleappearstobemorelax。Idonothesitatetomaketheremark，forIamaslittledisposedtoflattermycontemporariesastomalignthem。Thisfactmustdistress，butitoughtnottosurpriseus。Thepropitiousinfluencewhichademocraticstateofsocietymayexerciseuponorderlyhabits，isoneofthosetendencieswhichcanonlybediscoveredafteratime。Iftheequalityofconditionsisfavorabletopurityofmorals，thesocialcommotionbywhichconditionsarerenderedequalisadversetoit。Inthelastfiftyyears，duringwhichFrancehasbeenundergoingthistransformation，thatcountryhasrarelyhadfreedom，alwaysdisturbance。Amidstthisuniversalconfusionofnotionsandthisgeneralstirofopinions—amidstthisincoherentmixtureofthejustandunjust，oftruthandfalsehood，ofrightandmight—publicvirtuehasbecomedoubtful，andprivatemoralitywavering。Butallrevolutions，whatevermayhavebeentheirobjectortheiragents，haveatfirstproducedsimilarconsequences;eventhosewhichhaveintheenddrawnthebondsofmoralitymoretightlybeganbylooseningthem。TheviolationsofmoralitywhichtheFrenchfrequentlywitnessdonotappeartometohaveapermanentcharacter;andthisisalreadybetokenedbysomecurioussignsofthetimes。
Nothingismorewretchedlycorruptthananaristocracywhichretainsitswealthwhenithaslostitspower，andwhichstillenjoysavastdealofleisureafteritisreducedtomerevulgarpastimes。Theenergeticpassionsandgreatconceptionswhichanimateditheretofore，leaveitthen;andnothingremainstoitbutahostofpettyconsumingvices，whichclingaboutitlikewormsuponacarcass。NoonedeniesthattheFrencharistocracyofthelastcenturywasextremelydissolute;whereasestablishedhabitsandancientbeliefstillpreservedsomerespectformoralityamongsttheotherclassesofsociety。Norwillitbecontestedthatatthepresentdaytheremnantsofthatsamearistocracyexhibitacertainseverityofmorals;whilstlaxityofmoralsappearstohavespreadamongstthemiddleandlowerranks。Sothatthesamefamilieswhichweremostprofligatefiftyyearsagoarenowadaysthemostexemplary，anddemocracyseemsonlytohavestrengthenedthemoralityofthearistocraticclasses。TheFrenchRevolution，bydividingthefortunesofthenobility，byforcingthemtoattendassiduouslytotheiraffairsandtotheirfamilies，bymakingthemliveunderthesameroofwiththeirchildren，andinshortbygivingamorerationalandseriousturntotheirminds，hasimpartedtothem，almostwithouttheirbeingawareofit，areverenceforreligiousbelief，aloveoforder，oftranquilpleasures，ofdomesticendearments，andofcomfort;whereastherestofthenation，whichhadnaturallythesesametastes，wascarriedawayintoexcessesbytheeffortwhichwasrequiredtooverthrowthelawsandpoliticalhabitsofthecountry。TheoldFrencharistocracyhasundergonetheconsequencesoftheRevolution，butitneitherfelttherevolutionarypassionsnorsharedintheanarchicalexcitementwhichproducedthatcrisis;itmayeasilybeconceivedthatthisaristocracyfeelsthesalutaryinfluenceoftheRevolutioninitsmanners，beforethosewhoachieveit。Itmaythereforebesaid，thoughatfirstitseemsparadoxical，that，atthepresentday，themostanti—democraticclassesofthenationprincipallyexhibitthekindofmoralitywhichmayreasonablybeanticipatedfromdemocracy。IcannotbutthinkthatwhenweshallhaveobtainedalltheeffectsofthisdemocraticRevolution，afterhavinggotridofthetumultithascaused，theobservationswhicharenowonlyapplicabletothefewwillgraduallybecometrueofthewholecommunity。
ChapterXII:HowTheAmericansUnderstandTheEqualityOfTheSexesIHaveshownhowdemocracydestroysormodifiesthedifferentinequalitieswhichoriginateinsociety;butisthisall？ordoesitnotultimatelyaffectthatgreatinequalityofmanandwomanwhichhasseemed，uptothepresentday，tobeeternallybasedinhumannature？Ibelievethatthesocialchangeswhichbringnearertothesamelevelthefatherandson，themasterandservant，andsuperiorsandinferiorsgenerallyspeaking，willraisewomanandmakehermoreandmoretheequalofman。Buthere，morethanever，Ifeelthenecessityofmakingmyselfclearlyunderstood;forthereisnosubjectonwhichthecoarseandlawlessfanciesofouragehavetakenafreerrange。
TherearepeopleinEuropewho，confoundingtogetherthedifferentcharacteristicsofthesexes，wouldmakeofmanandwomanbeingsnotonlyequalbutalike。Theywouldgivetoboththesamefunctions，imposeonboththesameduties，andgranttoboththesamerights;theywouldmixtheminallthings—theiroccupations，theirpleasures，theirbusiness。Itmayreadilybeconceived，thatbythusattemptingtomakeonesexequaltotheother，botharedegraded;andfromsopreposterousamedleyoftheworksofnaturenothingcouldeverresultbutweakmenanddisorderlywomen。ItisnotthusthattheAmericansunderstandthatspeciesofdemocraticequalitywhichmaybeestablishedbetweenthesexes。Theyadmit，thatasnaturehasappointedsuchwidedifferencesbetweenthephysicalandmoralconstitutionofmanandwoman，hermanifestdesignwastogiveadistinctemploymenttotheirvariousfaculties;andtheyholdthatimprovementdoesnotconsistinmakingbeingssodissimilardoprettynearlythesamethings，butingettingeachofthemtofulfiltheirrespectivetasksinthebestpossiblemanner。TheAmericanshaveappliedtothesexesthegreatprincipleofpoliticaleconomywhichgovernsthemanufacturesofourage，bycarefullydividingthedutiesofmanfromthoseofwoman，inorderthatthegreatworkofsocietymaybethebettercarriedon。
InnocountryhassuchconstantcarebeentakenasinAmericatotracetwoclearlydistinctlinesofactionforthetwosexes，andtomakethemkeeppaceonewiththeother，butintwopathwayswhicharealwaysdifferent。Americanwomennevermanagetheoutwardconcernsofthefamily，orconductabusiness，ortakeapartinpoliticallife;norarethey，ontheotherhand，evercompelledtoperformtheroughlaborofthefields，ortomakeanyofthoselaboriousexertionswhichdemandtheexertionofphysicalstrength。Nofamiliesaresopoorastoformanexceptiontothisrule。IfontheonehandanAmericanwomancannotescapefromthequietcircleofdomesticemployments，ontheotherhandsheisneverforcedtogobeyondit。HenceitisthatthewomenofAmerica，whooftenexhibitamasculinestrengthofunderstandingandamanlyenergy，generallypreservegreatdelicacyofpersonalappearanceandalwaysretainthemannersofwomen，althoughtheysometimesshowthattheyhavetheheartsandmindsofmen。
NorhavetheAmericanseversupposedthatoneconsequenceofdemocraticprinciplesisthesubversionofmaritalpower，oftheconfusionofthenaturalauthoritiesinfamilies。Theyholdthateveryassociationmusthaveaheadinordertoaccomplishitsobject，andthatthenaturalheadoftheconjugalassociationisman。Theydonotthereforedenyhimtherightofdirectinghispartner;andtheymaintain，thatinthesmallerassociationofhusbandandwife，aswellasinthegreatsocialcommunity，theobjectofdemocracyistoregulateandlegalizethepowerswhicharenecessary，nottosubvertallpower。Thisopinionisnotpeculiartoonesex，andcontestedbytheother:IneverobservedthatthewomenofAmericaconsiderconjugalauthorityasafortunateusurpationoftheirrights，northattheythoughtthemselvesdegradedbysubmittingtoit。Itappearedtome，onthecontrary，thattheyattachasortofpridetothevoluntarysurrenderoftheirownwill，andmakeittheirboasttobendthemselvestotheyoke，nottoshakeitoff。Suchatleastisthefeelingexpressedbythemostvirtuousoftheirsex;theothersaresilent;andintheUnitedStatesitisnotthepracticeforaguiltywifetoclamorfortherightsofwomen，whilstsheistramplingonherholiestduties。
IthasoftenbeenremarkedthatinEuropeacertaindegreeofcontemptlurksevenintheflatterywhichmenlavishuponwomen:althoughaEuropeanfrequentlyaffectstobetheslaveofwoman，itmaybeseenthatheneversincerelythinksherhisequal。IntheUnitedStatesmenseldomcomplimentwomen，buttheydailyshowhowmuchtheyesteemthem。Theyconstantlydisplayanentireconfidenceintheunderstandingofawife，andaprofoundrespectforherfreedom;theyhavedecidedthathermindisjustasfittedasthatofamantodiscovertheplaintruth，andherheartasfirmtoembraceit;andtheyhaveneversoughttoplacehervirtue，anymorethanhis，undertheshelterofprejudice，ignorance，andfear。ItwouldseemthatinEurope，wheremansoeasilysubmitstothedespoticswayofwomen，theyareneverthelesscurtailedofsomeofthegreatestqualitiesofthehumanspecies，andconsideredasseductivebutimperfectbeings;and（whatmaywellprovokeastonishment）womenultimatelylookuponthemselvesinthesamelight，andalmostconsideritasaprivilegethattheyareentitledtoshowthemselvesfutile，feeble，andtimid。ThewomenofAmericaclaimnosuchprivileges。
Again，itmaybesaidthatinourmoralswehavereservedstrangeimmunitiestoman;sothatthereis，asitwere，onevirtueforhisuse，andanotherfortheguidanceofhispartner;
andthat，accordingtotheopinionofthepublic，theverysameactmaybepunishedalternatelyasacrimeoronlyasafault。
TheAmericansknownotthisiniquitousdivisionofdutiesandrights;amongstthemtheseducerisasmuchdishonoredashisvictim。ItistruethattheAmericansrarelylavishuponwomenthoseeagerattentionswhicharecommonlypaidtheminEurope;
buttheirconducttowomenalwaysimpliesthattheysupposethemtobevirtuousandrefined;andsuchistherespectentertainedforthemoralfreedomofthesex，thatinthepresenceofawomanthemostguardedlanguageisused，lestherearshouldbeoffendedbyanexpression。InAmericaayoungunmarriedwomanmay，aloneandwithoutfear，undertakealongjourney。