`Now，\'hesaid，whentheenvelopesweresealedandaddressed，`shallwepostthemhere，bothtogether？IknowJackiewillsay，\"Here\'sacoincidence！\"
whenhereceivestheminalltheiridentity。Shallwelethimsayit，ornot？\'
`Idon\'tcare，\'shesaid。
`No——？\'hesaid，pondering。
`Itdoesn\'tmatter，doesit？\'shesaid。
`Yes，\'hereplied。`Theirimaginationsshallnotworkonus。I\'llpostyourshere，mineafter。Icannotbeimplicatedintheirimaginings。\'
Helookedatherwithhisstrange，non—humansingleness。
`Yes，youareright，\'shesaid。
Sheliftedherfacetohim，allshiningandopen。Itwasasifhemightenterstraightintothesourceofherradiance。Hisfacebecamealittledistracted。
`Shallwego？\'hesaid。
`Asyoulike，\'shereplied。
Theyweresoonoutofthelittletown，andrunningthroughtheunevenlanesofthecountry。Ursulanestlednearhim，intohisconstantwarmth，andwatchedthepale—litrevelationracingahead，thevisiblenight。Sometimesitwasawideoldroad，withgrass—spacesoneitherside，flyingmagicandelfininthegreenishillumination，sometimesitwastreesloomingoverhead，sometimesitwasbramblebushes，sometimesthewallsofacrew—yardandthebuttofabarn。
`AreyougoingtoShortlandstodinner？\'Ursulaaskedhimsuddenly。
Hestarted。
`GoodGod！\'hesaid。`Shortlands！Neveragain。Notthat。Besidesweshouldbetoolate。\'
`Wherearewegoingthen——totheMill？\'
`Ifyoulike。Pitytogoanywhereonthisgooddarknight。Pitytocomeoutofit，really。Pitywecan\'tstopinthegooddarkness。Itisbetterthananythingeverwouldbe——thisgoodimmediatedarkness。\'
Shesatwondering。Thecarlurchedandswayed。Sheknewtherewasnoleavinghim，thedarknessheldthembothandcontainedthem，itwasnottobesurpassedBesidesshehadafullmysticknowledgeofhissuaveloinsofdarkness，dark—cladandsuave，andinthisknowledgetherewassomeoftheinevitabilityandthebeautyoffate，fatewhichoneasksfor，whichoneacceptsinfull。
HesatstilllikeanEgyptianPharoah，drivingthecar。Hefeltasifhewereseatedinimmemorialpotency，likethegreatcarvenstatuesofrealEgypt，asrealandasfulfilledwithsubtlestrength，astheseare，withavagueinscrutablesmileonthelips。Heknewwhatitwastohavethestrangeandmagicalcurrentofforceinhisbackandloins，anddownhislegs，forcesoperfectthatitstayedhimimmobile，andlefthisfacesubtly，mindlesslysmiling。Heknewwhatitwastobeawakeandpotentinthatotherbasicmind，thedeepestphysicalmind。Andfromthissourcehehadapureandmagiccontrol，magical，mystical，aforceindarkness，likeelectricity。
Itwasverydifficulttospeak，itwassoperfecttositinthispurelivingsilence，subtle，fullofunthinkableknowledgeandunthinkableforce，upheldimmemoriallyintimelessforce，liketheimmobile，supremelypotentEgyptians，seatedforeverintheirliving，subtlesilence。
`Weneednotgohome，\'hesaid。`Thiscarhasseatsthatletdownandmakeabed，andwecanliftthehood。\'
Shewasgladandfrightened。Shecoweredneartohim。
`Butwhataboutthemathome？\'shesaid。
`Sendatelegram。\'
Nothingmorewassaid。Theyranoninsilence。Butwithasortofsecondconsciousnesshesteeredthecartowardsadestination。Forhehadthefreeintelligencetodirecthisownends。HisarmsandhisbreastandhisheadwereroundedandlivinglikethoseoftheGreek，hehadnottheunawakenedstraightarmsoftheEgyptian，northesealed，slumberinghead。AlambentintelligenceplayedsecondarilyabovehispureEgyptianconcentrationindarkness。
Theycametoavillagethatlinedalongtheroad。Thecarcreptslowlyalong，untilhesawthepost—office。Thenhepulledup。
`Iwillsendatelegramtoyourfather，\'hesaid。`Iwillmerelysay\"spendingthenightintown，\"shallI？\'
`Yes，\'sheanswered。Shedidnotwanttobedisturbedintotakingthought。
Shewatchedhimmoveintothepost—office。Itwasalsoashop，shesaw。
Strange，hewas。Evenashewentintothelighted，publicplaceheremaineddarkandmagic，thelivingsilenceseemedthebodyofrealityinhim，subtle，potent，indiscoverable。Therehewas！Inastrangeupliftofelationshesawhim，thebeingnevertoberevealed，awfulinitspotency，mysticandreal。Thisdark，subtlerealityofhim，nevertobetranslated，liberatedherintoperfection，herownperfectedbeing。Shetoowasdarkandfulfilledinsilence。
Hecameout，throwingsomepackagesintothecar。
`Thereissomebread，andcheese，andraisins，andapples，andhardchocolate，\'hesaid，inhisvoicethatwasasiflaughing，becauseoftheunblemishedstillnessandforcewhichwastherealityinhim。Shewouldhavetotouchhim。Tospeak，tosee，wasnothing。Itwasatravestytolookandtocomprehendthemanthere。Darknessandsilencemustfallperfectlyonher，thenshecouldknowmystically，inunrevealedtouch。Shemustlightly，mindlesslyconnectwithhim，havetheknowledgewhichisdeathofknowledge，therealityofsuretyinnot—knowing。
Soontheyhadrunonagainintothedarkness。Shedidnotaskwheretheyweregoing，shedidnotcare。Shesatinafullnessandapurepotencythatwaslikeapathy，mindlessandimmobile。Shewasnexttohim，andhunginapurerest，asastarishung，balancedunthinkably。Stillthereremainedadarklambencyofanticipation。Shewouldtouchhim。Withperfectfinefinger—tipsofrealityshewouldtouchtherealityinhim，thesuave，pure，untranslatablerealityofhisloinsofdarkness。Totouch，mindlesslyindarknesstocomeinpuretouchinguponthelivingrealityofhim，hissuaveperfectloinsandthighsofdarkness，thiswashersustaininganticipation。
Andhetoowaitedinthemagicalsteadfastnessofsuspense，forhertotakethisknowledgeofhimashehadtakenitofher。Heknewherdarkly，withthefullnessofdarkknowledge。Nowshewouldknowhim，andhetoowouldbeliberated。Hewouldbenight—free，likeanEgyptian，steadfastinperfectlysuspendedequilibrium，puremysticnodalityofphysicalbeing。
Theywouldgiveeachotherthisstar—equilibriumwhichaloneisfreedom。
Shesawthattheywererunningamongtrees——greatoldtreeswithdyingbrackenundergrowth。Thepalish，gnarledtrunksshowedghostly，andlikeoldpriestsinthehoveringdistance，thefernrosemagicalandmysterious。
Itwasanightalldarkness，withlowcloud。Themotor—caradvancedslowly。
`Wherearewe？\'shewhispered。
`InSherwoodForest。\'
Itwasevidentheknewtheplace。Hedrovesoftly，watching。Thentheycametoagreenroadbetweenthetrees。Theyturnedcautiouslyround，andwereadvancingbetweentheoaksoftheforest，downagreenlane。Thegreenlanewidenedintoalittlecircleofgrass，wheretherewasasmalltrickleofwateratthebottomofaslopingbank。Thecarstopped。
`Wewillstayhere，\'hesaid，`andputoutthelights。\'
Heextinguishedthelampsatonce，anditwaspurenight，withshadowsoftreeslikerealitiesofother，nightlybeing。Hethrewarugontothebracken，andtheysatinstillnessandmindlesssilence。Therewerefaintsoundsfromthewood，butnodisturbance，nopossibledisturbance，theworldwasunderastrangeban，anewmysteryhadsupervened。Theythrewofftheirclothes，andhegatheredhertohim，andfoundher，foundthepurelambentrealityofherforeverinvisibleflesh。Quenched，inhuman，hisfingersuponherunrevealednuditywerethefingersofsilenceuponsilence，thebodyofmysteriousnightuponthebodyofmysteriousnight，thenightmasculineandfeminine，nevertobeseenwiththeeye，orknownwiththemind，onlyknownasapalpablerevelationoflivingotherness。
Shehadherdesireofhim，shetouched，shereceivedthemaximumofunspeakablecommunicationintouch，dark，subtle，positivelysilent，amagnificentgiftandgiveagain，aperfectacceptanceandyielding，amystery，therealityofthatwhichcanneverbeknown，vital，sensualrealitythatcanneverbetransmutedintomindcontent，butremainsoutside，livingbodyofdarknessandsilenceandsubtlety，themysticbodyofreality。
Shehadherdesirefulfilled。Hehadhisdesirefulfilled。Forshewastohimwhathewastoher，theimmemorialmagnificenceofmystic，palpable，realotherness。
Theysleptthechillynightthroughunderthehoodofthecar，anightofunbrokensleep。Itwasalreadyhighdaywhenheawoke。Theylookedateachotherandlaughed，thenlookedaway，filledwithdarknessandsecrecy。
Thentheykissedandrememberedthemagnificenceofthenight。Itwassomagnificent，suchaninheritanceofauniverseofdarkreality，thattheywereafraidtoseemtoremember。Theyhidawaytheremembranceandtheknowledge。
WomenInLove:Chapter24CHAPTERXXIVDeathandLoveTHOMASCRICHdiedslowly，terriblyslowly。Itseemedimpossibletoeverybodythatthethreadoflifecouldbedrawnoutsothin，andyetnotbreak。Thesickmanlayunutterablyweakandspent，keptalivebymorphiaandbydrinks，whichhesippedslowly。
Hewasonlyhalfconscious——athinstrandofconsciousnesslinkingthedarknessofdeathwiththelightofday。Yethiswillwasunbroken，hewasintegral，complete。Onlyhemusthaveperfectstillnessabouthim。
Anypresencebutthatofthenurseswasastrainandanefforttohimnow。EverymorningGeraldwentintotheroom，hopingtofindhisfatherpassedawayatlast。Yetalwayshesawthesametransparentface，thesamedreaddarkhaironthewaxenforehead，andtheawful，inchoatedarkeyes，whichseemedtobedecomposingintoformlessdarkness，havingonlyatinygrainofvisionwithinthem。
Andalways，asthedark，inchoateeyesturnedtohim，therepassedthroughGerald\'sbowelsaburningstrokeofrevolt，thatseemedtoresoundthroughhiswholebeing，threateningtobreakhismindwithitsclangour，andmakinghimmad。
Everymorning，thesonstoodthere，erectandtautwithlife，gleaminginhisblondness。Thegleamingblondnessofhisstrange，imminentbeingputthefatherintoafeveroffretfulirritation。Hecouldnotbeartomeettheuncanny，downwardlookofGerald\'sblueeyes。Butitwasonlyforamoment。Eachonthebrinkofdeparture，thefatherandsonlookedateachother，thenparted。
ForalongtimeGeraldpreservedaperfectsangfroid，heremainedquitecollected。Butatlast，fearunderminedhim。Hewasafraidofsomehorriblecollapseinhimself。Hehadtostayandseethisthingthrough。Someperversewillmadehimwatchhisfatherdrawnoverthebordersoflife。Andyet，now，everyday，thegreatred—hotstrokeofhorrifiedfearthroughthebowelsofthesonstruckafurtherinflammation。Geraldwentaboutalldaywithatendencytocringe，asiftherewerethepointofaswordofDamoclesprickingthenapeofhisneck。
Therewasnoescape——hewasboundupwithhisfather，hehadtoseehimthrough。Andthefather\'swillneverrelaxedoryieldedtodeath。Itwouldhavetosnapwhendeathatlastsnappedit，——ifitdidnotpersistafteraphysicaldeath。Inthesameway，thewillofthesonneveryielded。
Hestoodfirmandimmune，hewasoutsidethisdeathandthisdying。
Itwasatrialbyordeal。Couldhestandandseehisfatherslowlydissolveanddisappearindeath，withoutonceyieldinghiswill，withoutoncerelentingbeforetheomnipotenceofdeath。LikeaRedIndianundergoingtorture，Geraldwouldexperiencethewholeprocessofslowdeathwithoutwincingorflinching。Heeventriumphedinit。Hesomehowwantedthisdeath，evenforcedit。Itwasasifhehimselfweredealingthedeath，evenwhenhemostrecoiledinhorror。Still，hewoulddealit，hewouldtriumphthroughdeath。
Butinthestressofthisordeal，Geraldtoolosthisholdontheouter，dailylife。Thatwhichwasmuchtohim，cametomeannothing。Work，pleasure——itwasallleftbehind。Hewentonmoreorlessmechanicallywithhisbusiness，butthisactivitywasallextraneous。Therealactivitywasthisghastlywrestlingfordeathinhisownsoul。Andhisownwillshouldtriumph。
Comewhatmight，hewouldnotbowdownorsubmitoracknowledgeamaster。
Hehadnomasterindeath。
Butasthefightwenton，andallthathehadbeenandwascontinuedtobedestroyed，sothatlifewasahollowshellallroundhim，roaringandclatteringlikethesoundofthesea，anoiseinwhichheparticipatedexternally，andinsidethishollowshellwasallthedarknessandfearfulspaceofdeath，heknewhewouldhavetofindreinforcements，otherwisehewouldcollapseinwardsuponthegreatdarkvoidwhichcircledatthecentreofhissoul。Hiswillheldhisouterlife，hisoutermind，hisouterbeingunbrokenandunchanged。Butthepressurewastoogreat。Hewouldhavetofindsomethingtomakegoodtheequilibrium。Somethingmustcomewithhimintothehollowvoidofdeathinhissoul，fillitup，andsoequalisethepressurewithintothepressurewithout。Fordaybydayhefeltmoreandmorelikeabubblefilledwithdarkness，roundwhichwhirledtheiridescenceofhisconsciousness，anduponwhichthepressureoftheouterworld，theouterlife，roaredvastly。
InthisextremityhisinstinctledhimtoGudrun。Hethrewawayeverythingnow——heonlywantedtherelationestablishedwithher。Hewouldfollowhertothestudio，tobenearher，totalktoher。Hewouldstandabouttheroom，aimlesslypickinguptheimplements，thelumpsofclay，thelittlefiguresshehadcast——theywerewhimsicalandgrotesque——lookingatthemwithoutperceivingthem。Andshefelthimfollowingher，doggingherheelslikeadoom。Sheheldawayfromhim，andyetsheknewhedrewalwaysalittlenearer，alittlenearer。
`Isay，\'hesaidtoheroneevening，inanodd，unthinking，uncertainway，`won\'tyoustaytodinnertonight？Iwishyouwould。\'
Shestartedslightly。Hespoketoherlikeamanmakingarequestofanotherman。
`They\'llbeexpectingmeathome，\'shesaid。
`Oh，theywon\'tmind，willthey？\'hesaid。`Ishouldbeawfullygladifyou\'dstay。\'
Herlongsilencegaveconsentatlast。
`I\'lltellThomas，shallI？\'hesaid。
`Imustgoalmostimmediatelyafterdinner，\'shesaid。
Itwasadark，coldevening。Therewasnofireinthedrawing—room，theysatinthelibrary。Hewasmostlysilent，absent，andWinifredtalkedlittle。ButwhenGeralddidrousehimself，hesmiledandwaspleasantandordinarywithher。Thentherecameoverhimagainthelongblanks，ofwhichhewasnotaware。
Shewasverymuchattractedbyhim。Helookedsopreoccupied，andhisstrange，blanksilences，whichshecouldnotread，movedherandmadeherwonderoverhim，madeherfeelreverentialtowardshim。
Buthewasverykind。Hegaveherthebestthingsatthetable，hehadabottleofslightlysweet，deliciousgoldenwinebroughtoutfordinner，knowingshewouldpreferittotheburgundy。Shefeltherselfesteemed，neededalmost。
Astheytookcoffeeinthelibrary，therewasasoft，verysoftknockingatthedoor。Hestarted，andcalled`Comein。\'Thetimbreofhisvoice，likesomethingvibratingathighpitch，unnervedGudrun。Anurseinwhiteentered，halfhoveringinthedoorwaylikeashadow。Shewasverygood—looking，butstrangelyenough，shyandself—mistrusting。
`Thedoctorwouldliketospeaktoyou，MrCrich，\'shesaid，inherlow，discreetvoice。
`Thedoctor！\'hesaid，startingup。`Whereishe？\'
`Heisinthedining—room。\'
`TellhimI\'mcoming。\'
Hedrankuphiscoffee，andfollowedthenurse，whohaddissolvedlikeashadow。
`Whichnursewasthat？\'askedGudrun。
`MissInglis——Ilikeherbest，\'repliedWinifred。
AfterawhileGeraldcameback，lookingabsorbedbyhisownthoughts，andhavingsomeofthattensionandabstractionwhichisseeninaslightlydrunkenman。Hedidnotsaywhatthedoctorhadwantedhimfor，butstoodbeforethefire，withhishandsbehindhisback，andhisfaceopenandasifrapt。Notthathewasreallythinking——hewasonlyarrestedinpuresuspenseinsidehimself，andthoughtswaftedthroughhismindwithoutorder。
`ImustgonowandseeMama，\'saidWinifred，`andseeDaddabeforehegoestosleep。\'
Shebadethembothgood—night。
Gudrunalsorosetotakeherleave。
`Youneedn\'tgoyet，needyou？\'saidGerald，glancingquicklyattheclock。\'Itisearlyyet。I\'llwalkdownwithyouwhenyougo。Sitdown，don\'thurryaway。\'
Gudrunsatdown，asif，absentashewas，hiswillhadpoweroverher。
Shefeltalmostmesmerised。Hewasstrangetoher，somethingunknown。Whatwashethinking，whatwashefeeling，ashestoodtheresorapt，sayingnothing？Hekepther——shecouldfeelthat。Hewouldnotlethergo。Shewatchedhiminhumblesubmissiveness。
`Hadthedoctoranythingnewtotellyou？\'sheasked，softly，atlength，withthatgentle，timidsympathywhichtouchedakeenfibreinhisheart。
Heliftedhiseyebrowswithanegligent，indifferentexpression。
`No——nothingnew，\'hereplied，asifthequestionwerequitecasual，trivial。`Hesaysthepulseisveryweakindeed，veryintermittent——butthatdoesn\'tnecessarilymeanmuch，youknow。\'
Helookeddownather。Hereyesweredarkandsoftandunfolded，withastrickenlookthatrousedhim。
`No，\'shemurmuredatlength。`Idon\'tunderstandanythingaboutthesethings。\'
`Justaswellnot，\'hesaid。`Isay，won\'tyouhaveacigarette？——
do！\'Hequicklyfetchedthebox，andheldheralight。Thenhestoodbeforeheronthehearthagain。
`No，\'hesaid，`we\'veneverhadmuchillnessinthehouse，either——
nottillfather。\'Heseemedtomeditateawhile。Thenlookingdownather，withstrangelycommunicativeblueeyes，thatfilledherwithdread，hecontinued:`It\'ssomethingyoudon\'treckonwith，youknow，tillitisthere。Andthenyourealisethatitwasthereallthetime——itwasalwaysthere——youunderstandwhatImean？——thepossibilityofthisincurableillness，thisslowdeath。\'
Hemovedhisfeetuneasilyonthemarblehearth，andputhiscigarettetohismouth，lookingupattheceiling。
`Iknow，\'murmuredGudrun:`itisdreadful。\'
Hesmokedwithoutknowing。Thenhetookthecigarettefromhislips，baredhisteeth，andputtingthetipofhistonguebetweenhisteethspatoffagrainoftobacco，turningslightlyaside，likeamanwhoisalone，orwhoislostinthought。
`Idon\'tknowwhattheeffectactuallyis，onone，\'hesaid，andagainhelookeddownather。Hereyesweredarkandstrickenwithknowledge，lookingintohis。Hesawhersubmerged，andheturnedasidehisface。`ButIabsolutelyamnotthesame。There\'snothingleft，ifyouunderstandwhatImean。Youseemtobeclutchingatthevoid——andatthesametimeyouarevoidyourself。Andsoyoudon\'tknowwhattodo。\'
`No，\'shemurmured。Aheavythrillrandownhernerves，heavy，almostpleasure，almostpain。`Whatcanbedone？\'sheadded。
Heturned，andflippedtheashfromhiscigaretteontothegreatmarblehearth—stones，thatlaybareintheroom，withoutfenderorbar。
`Idon\'tknow，I\'msure，\'hereplied。`ButIdothinkyou\'vegottofindsomewayofresolvingthesituation——notbecauseyouwantto，butbecauseyou\'vegotto，otherwiseyou\'redone。Thewholeofeverything，andyourselfincluded，isjustonthepointofcavingin，andyouarejustholdingitupwithyourhands。Well，it\'sasituationthatobviouslycan\'tcontinue。Youcan\'tstandholdingtheroofupwithyourhands，forever。
Youknowthatsoonerorlateryou\'llhavetoletgo。DoyouunderstandwhatImean？Andsosomething\'sgottobedone，orthere\'sauniversalcollapse——asfarasyouyourselfareconcerned。\'
Heshiftedslightlyonthehearth，crunchingacinderunderhisheel。
Helookeddownatit。Gudrunwasawareofthebeautifuloldmarblepanelsofthefireplace，swellingsoftlycarved，roundhimandabovehim。Shefeltasifshewerecaughtatlastbyfate，imprisonedinsomehorribleandfataltrap。
`Butwhatcanbedone？\'shemurmuredhumbly。`YoumustusemeifIcanbeofanyhelpatall——buthowcanI？Idon\'tseehowIcanhelpyou。\'
Helookeddownathercritically。
`Idon\'twantyoutohelp，\'hesaid，slightlyirritated，`becausethere\'snothingtobedone。Ionlywantsympathy，doyousee:I
wantsomebodyIcantalktosympathetically。Thateasesthestrain。Andthereisnobodytotalktosympathetically。That\'sthecuriousthing。
Thereisnobody。There\'sRupertBirkin。Butthenheisn\'tsympathetic，hewantstodictate。Andthatisnousewhatsoever。\'
Shewascaughtinastrangesnare。Shelookeddownatherhands。
Thentherewasthesoundofthedoorsoftlyopening。Geraldstarted。
Hewaschagrined。ItwashisstartingthatreallystartledGudrun。Thenhewentforward，withquick，graceful，intentionalcourtesy。
`Oh，mother！\'hesaid。`Howniceofyoutocomedown。Howareyou？\'
Theelderlywoman，looselyandbulkilywrappedinapurplegown，cameforwardsilently，slightlyhulked，asusual。Hersonwasatherside。Hepushedherupachair，saying`YouknowMissBrangwen，don\'tyou？\'
ThemotherglancedatGudrunindifferently。
`Yes，\'shesaid。Thensheturnedherwonderful，forget—me—notblueeyesuptoherson，assheslowlysatdowninthechairhehadbroughther。
`Icametoaskyouaboutyourfather，\'shesaid，inherrapid，scarcely—audiblevoice。`Ididn\'tknowyouhadcompany。\'
`No？Didn\'tWinifredtellyou？MissBrangwenstayedtodinner，tomakeusalittlemorelively——\'
MrsCrichturnedslowlyroundtoGudrun，andlookedather，butwithunseeingeyes。
`I\'mafraiditwouldbenotreattoher。\'Thensheturnedagaintoherson。`Winifredtellsmethedoctorhadsomethingtosayaboutyourfather。
Whatisit？\'
`Onlythatthepulseisveryweak——missesaltogetheragoodmanytimes——sothathemightnotlastthenightout，\'Geraldreplied。
MrsCrichsatperfectlyimpassive，asifshehadnotheard。Herbulkseemedhunchedinthechair，herfairhairhungslackoverherears。Butherskinwasclearandfine，herhands，asshesatwiththemforgottenandfolded，werequitebeautiful，fullofpotentialenergy。Agreatmassofenergyseemeddecayingupinthatsilent，hulkingform。
Shelookedupatherson，ashestood，keenandsoldierly，neartoher。
Hereyesweremostwonderfullyblue，bluerthanforget—me—nots。SheseemedtohaveacertainconfidenceinGerald，andtofeelacertainmotherlymistrustofhim。
`Howareyou？\'shemuttered，inherstrangelyquietvoice，asifnobodyshouldhearbuthim。`You\'renotgettingintoastate，areyou？
You\'renotlettingitmakeyouhysterical？\'
ThecuriouschallengeinthelastwordsstartledGudrun。
`Idon\'tthinkso，mother，\'heanswered，rathercoldlycheery。
`Somebody\'sgottoseeitthrough，youknow。\'
`Havethey？Havethey？\'answeredhismotherrapidly。`Whyshouldyoutakeitonyourself？Whathaveyougottodo，seeingitthrough。Itwillseeitselfthrough。Youarenotneeded。\'
`No，Idon\'tsupposeIcandoanygood，\'heanswered。`It\'sjusthowitaffectsus，yousee。\'
`Youliketobeaffected——don\'tyou？It\'squitenutsforyou？Youwouldhavetobeimportant。Youhavenoneedtostopathome。Whydon\'tyougoaway！\'
Thesesentences，evidentlytheripenedgrainofmanydarkhours，tookGeraldbysurprise。
`Idon\'tthinkit\'sanygoodgoingawaynow，mother，atthelastminute，\'
hesaid，coldly。
`Youtakecare，\'repliedhismother。`Youmindyourself——that\'syourbusiness。Youtaketoomuchonyourself。Youmindyourself，oryou\'llfindyourselfinQueerStreet，that\'swhatwillhappentoyou。
You\'rehysterical，alwayswere。\'
`I\'mallright，mother，\'hesaid。`There\'snoneedtoworryaboutme，Iassureyou。\'
`Letthedeadburytheirdead——don\'tgoandburyyourselfalongwiththem——that\'swhatItellyou。Iknowyouwellenough。\'
Hedidnotanswerthis，notknowingwhattosay。Themothersatbunchedupinsilence，herbeautifulwhitehands，thathadnoringswhatsoever，claspingthepommelsofherarm—chair。
`Youcan\'tdoit，\'shesaid，almostbitterly。`Youhaven\'tthenerve。
You\'reasweakasacat，really——alwayswere。Isthisyoungwomanstayinghere？\'
`No，\'saidGerald。`Sheisgoinghometonight。\'
`Thenshe\'dbetterhavethedog—cart。Doesshegofar？\'
`OnlytoBeldover。\'
`Ah！\'TheelderlywomanneverlookedatGudrun，yetsheseemedtotakeknowledgeofherpresence。
`Youareinclinedtotaketoomuchonyourself，Gerald，\'saidthemother，pullingherselftoherfeet，withalittledifficulty。
`Willyougo，mother？\'heasked，politely。
`Yes，I\'llgoupagain，\'shereplied。TurningtoGudrun，shebadeher`Good—night。\'Thenshewentslowlytothedoor，asifshewereunaccustomedtowalking。Atthedoorsheliftedherfacetohim，implicitly。Hekissedher。
`Don\'tcomeanyfurtherwithme，\'shesaid，inherbarelyaudiblevoice。
`Idon\'twantyouanyfurther。\'
Hebadehergood—night，watchedheracrosstothestairsandmountslowly。
ThenheclosedthedoorandcamebacktoGudrun。Gudrunrosealso，togo。
`Aqueerbeing，mymother，\'hesaid。
`Yes，\'repliedGudrun。
`Shehasherownthoughts。\'
`Yes，\'saidGudrun。
Thentheyweresilent。
`Youwanttogo？\'heasked。`Halfaminute，I\'lljusthaveahorseputin——\'
`No，\'saidGudrun。`Iwanttowalk。\'
Hehadpromisedtowalkwithherdownthelong，lonelymileofdrive，andshewantedthis。
`Youmightjustaswelldrive，\'hesaid。
`I\'dmuchratherwalk，\'sheasserted，withemphasis。
`Youwould！ThenIwillcomealongwithyou。Youknowwhereyourthingsare？I\'llputbootson。\'
Heputonacap，andanovercoatoverhiseveningdress。Theywentoutintothenight。
`Letuslightacigarette，\'hesaid，stoppinginashelteredangleoftheporch。`Youhaveonetoo。\'
So，withthescentoftobaccoonthenightair，theysetoffdownthedarkdrivethatranbetweenclose—cuthedgesthroughslopingmeadows。
Hewantedtoputhisarmroundher。Ifhecouldputhisarmroundher，anddrawheragainsthimastheywalked，hewouldequilibriatehimself。
Fornowhefeltlikeapairofscales，thehalfofwhichtipsdownanddownintoanindefinitevoid。Hemustrecoversomesortofbalance。Andherewasthehopeandtheperfectrecovery。
Blindtoher，thinkingonlyofhimself，heslippedhisarmsoftlyroundherwaist，anddrewhertohim。Herheartfainted，feelingherselftaken。
Butthen，hisarmwassostrong，shequailedunderitspowerfulclosegrasp。
Shediedalittledeath，andwasdrawnagainsthimastheywalkeddownthestormydarkness。Heseemedtobalanceherperfectlyinoppositiontohimself，intheirdualmotionofwalking。So，suddenly，hewasliberatedandperfect，strong，heroic。
Heputhishandtohismouthandthrewhiscigaretteaway，agleamingpoint，intotheunseenhedge。Thenhewasquitefreetobalanceher。
`That\'sbetter，\'hesaid，withexultancy。
Theexultationinhisvoicewaslikeasweetish，poisonousdrugtoher。
Didshethenmeansomuchtohim！Shesippedthepoison。
`Areyouhappier？\'sheasked，wistfully。
`Muchbetter，\'hesaid，inthesameexultantvoice，`andIwasratherfargone。\'
Shenestledagainsthim。Hefeltherallsoftandwarm，shewastherich，lovelysubstanceofhisbeing。Thewarmthandmotionofherwalksuffusedthroughhimwonderfully。
`I\'msogladifIhelpyou，\'shesaid。
`Yes，\'heanswered。`There\'snobodyelsecoulddoit，ifyouwouldn\'t。\'
`Thatistrue，\'shesaidtoherself，withathrillofstrange，fatalelation。
Astheywalked，heseemedtolifthernearerandnearertohimself，tillshemoveduponthefirmvehicleofhisbody。
Hewassostrong，sosustaining，andhecouldnotbeopposed。Shedriftedalonginawonderfulinterfusionofphysicalmotion，downthedark，blowyhillside。FaracrossshonethelittleyellowlightsofBeldover，manyofthem，spreadinathickpatchonanotherdarkhill。Butheandshewerewalkinginperfect，isolateddarkness，outsidetheworld。
`Buthowmuchdoyoucareforme！\'camehervoice，almostquerulous。