第25章
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  Ursuladidnotagree——peoplewerestillanadventuretoher——but——perhapsnotasmuchasshetriedtopersuadeherself。Perhapstherewassomethingmechanical,now,inherinterest。Perhapsalsoherinterestwasdestructive,heranalysingwasarealtearingtopieces。Therewasanunder—spaceinherwhereshedidnotcareforpeopleandtheiridiosyncracies,eventodestroythem。Sheseemedtotouchforamomentthisundersilenceinherself,shebecamestill,andsheturnedforamomentpurelytoBirkin。

  `Won\'titbelovelytogohomeinthedark?\'shesaid。`Wemighthavetearatherlate——shallwe?——andhavehightea?Wouldn\'tthatberathernice?\'

  `IpromisedtobeatShortlandsfordinner,\'hesaid。

  `But——itdoesn\'tmatter——youcangotomorrow——\'

  `Hermioneisthere,\'hesaid,inratheranuneasyvoice。`Sheisgoingawayintwodays。IsupposeIoughttosaygood—byetoher。Ishallneverseeheragain。\'

  Ursuladrewaway,closedinaviolentsilence。Heknittedhisbrows,andhiseyesbegantosparkleagaininanger。

  `Youdon\'tmind,doyou?\'heaskedirritably。

  `No,Idon\'tcare。WhyshouldI?WhyshouldImind?\'Hertonewasjeeringandoffensive。

  `That\'swhatIaskmyself,\'hesaid;`whyshouldyoumind!Butyouseemto。\'Hisbrowsweretensewithviolentirritation。

  `IassureyouIdon\'t,Idon\'tmindintheleast。Gowhereyoubelong——it\'swhatIwantyoutodo。\'

  `Ahyoufool!\'hecried,`withyour\"gowhereyoubelong。\"It\'sfinishedbetweenHermioneandme。Shemeansmuchmoretoyou,ifitcomestothat,thanshedoestome。Foryoucanonlyrevoltinpurereactionfromher——andtobeheroppositeistobehercounterpart。\'

  `Ah,opposite!\'criedUrsula。`Iknowyourdodges。Iamnottakeninbyyourword—twisting。YoubelongtoHermioneandherdeadshow。Well,ifyoudo,youdo。Idon\'tblameyou。Butthenyou\'venothingtodowithme。

  Inhisinflamed,overwroughtexasperation,hestoppedthecar,andtheysatthere,inthemiddleofthecountrylane,tohaveitout。Itwasacrisisofwarbetweenthem,sotheydidnotseetheridiculousnessoftheirsituation。

  `Ifyouweren\'tafool,ifonlyyouweren\'tafool,\'hecriedinbitterdespair,`you\'dseethatonecouldbedecent,evenwhenonehasbeenwrong。

  IwaswrongtogoonallthoseyearswithHermione——itwasadeathlyprocess。Butafterall,onecanhavealittlehumandecency。Butno,youwouldtearmysouloutwithyourjealousyattheverymentionofHermione\'sname。\'

  `Ijealous!I——jealous!Youaremistakenifyouthinkthat。I\'mnotjealousintheleastofHermione,sheisnothingtome,notthat!\'AndUrsulasnappedherfingers。`No,it\'syouwhoarealiar。

  It\'syouwhomustreturn,likeadogtohisvomit。ItiswhatHermionestandsforthatIhate。Ihateit。Itislies,itisfalse,itisdeath。Butyouwantit,youcan\'thelpit,youcan\'thelpyourself。Youbelongtothatold,deathlywayofliving——thengobacktoit。Butdon\'tcometome,forI\'venothingtodowithit。\'

  Andinthestressofherviolentemotion,shegotdownfromthecarandwenttothehedgerow,pickingunconsciouslysomeflesh—pinkspindleberries,someofwhichwereburst,showingtheirorangeseeds。

  `Ah,youareafool,\'hecried,bitterly,withsomecontempt。

  `Yes,Iam。Iamafool。AndthankGodforit。I\'mtoobigafooltoswallowyourcleverness。Godbepraised。Yougotoyourwomen——

  gotothem——theyareyoursort——you\'vealwayshadastringofthemtrailingafteryou——andyoualwayswill。Gotoyourspiritualbrides——butdon\'tcometomeaswell,becauseI\'mnothavingany,thankyou。

  You\'renotsatisfied,areyou?Yourspiritualbridescan\'tgiveyouwhatyouwant,theyaren\'tcommonandfleshyenoughforyou,aren\'tthey?Soyoucometome,andkeeptheminthebackground!Youwillmarrymefordailyuse。Butyou\'llkeepyourselfwellprovidedwithspiritualbridesinthebackground。Iknowyourdirtylittlegame。\'Suddenlyaflameranoverher,andshestampedherfootmadlyontheroad,andhewinced,afraidthatshewouldstrikehim。`AndI,I\'mnotspiritualenough,I\'mnotasspiritualasthatHermione——!\'Herbrowsknitted,hereyesblazedlikeatiger\'s。`Thengotoher,that\'sallIsay,gotoher,go。

  Ha,shespiritual——spiritual,she!Adirtymaterialistassheis。Shespiritual?Whatdoesshecarefor,whatisherspirituality?

  Whatisit?\'Herfuryseemedtoblazeoutandburnhisface。Heshrankalittle。`Itellyouit\'sdirt,dirt,andnothingbutdirt。Andit\'sdirtyouwant,youcraveforit。Spiritual!Isthatspiritual,herbullying,herconceit,hersordidmaterialism?She\'safishwife,afishwife,sheissuchamaterialist。Andallsosordid。Whatdoessheworkoutto,intheend,withallhersocialpassion,asyoucallit。Socialpassion——whatsocialpassionhasshe?——showitme!——whereisit?

  Shewantspetty,immediatepower,shewantstheillusionthatsheisagreatwoman,thatisall。Inhersoulshe\'sadevilishunbeliever,commonasdirt。That\'swhatsheisatthebottom。Andalltherestispretence——butyouloveit。Youlovetheshamspirituality,it\'syourfood。Andwhy?Becauseofthedirtunderneath。DoyouthinkIdon\'tknowthefoulnessofyoursexlife——andher\'s?——Ido。Andit\'sthatfoulnessyouwant,youliar。Thenhaveit,haveit。You\'resuchaliar。\'

  Sheturnedaway,spasmodicallytearingthetwigsofspindleberryfromthehedge,andfasteningthem,withvibratingfingers,inthebosomofhercoat。

  Hestoodwatchinginsilence。Awonderfultendernessburnedinhim,atthesightofherquivering,sosensitivefingers:andatthesametimehewasfullofrageandcallousness。

  `Thisisadegradingexhibition,\'hesaidcoolly。

  `Yes,degradingindeed,\'shesaid。`Butmoretomethantoyou。\'

  `Sinceyouchoosetodegradeyourself,\'hesaid。Againtheflashcameoverherface,theyellowlightsconcentratedinhereyes。

  `You!\'shecried。`You!Youtruth—lover!Youpurity—monger!Itstinks,yourtruthandyourpurity。Itstinksoftheoffalyoufeedon,youscavengerdog,youeaterofcorpses。Youarefoul,foulandyoumustknowit。Yourpurity,yourcandour,yourgoodness——yes,thankyou,we\'vehadsome。Whatyouareisafoul,deathlything,obscene,that\'swhatyouare,obsceneandperverse。You,andlove!Youmaywellsay,youdon\'twantlove。No,youwantyourself,anddirt,anddeath——that\'swhatyouwant。Youaresoperverse,sodeath—eating。Andthen——\'

  `There\'sabicyclecoming,\'hesaid,writhingunderherlouddenunciation。

  Sheglanceddowntheroad。

  `Idon\'tcare,\'shecried。

  Neverthelessshewassilent。Thecyclist,havingheardthevoicesraisedinaltercation,glancedcuriouslyattheman,andthewoman,andatthestandingmotor—carashepassed。

  `——Afternoon,\'hesaid,cheerfully。

  `Good—afternoon,\'repliedBirkincoldly。

  Theyweresilentasthemanpassedintothedistance。

  AclearerlookhadcomeoverBirkin\'sface。Heknewshewasinthemainright。Heknewhewasperverse,sospiritualontheonehand,andinsomestrangeway,degraded,ontheother。Butwassheherselfanybetter?Wasanybodyanybetter?

  `Itmayallbetrue,liesandstinkandall,\'hesaid。`ButHermione\'sspiritualintimacyisnorottenerthanyouremotional—jealousintimacy。

  Onecanpreservethedecencies,eventoone\'senemies:forone\'sownsake。

  Hermioneismyenemy——toherlastbreath!That\'swhyImustbowheroffthefield。\'

  `You!Youandyourenemiesandyourbows!Aprettypictureyoumakeofyourself。Butittakesnobodyinbutyourself。Ijealous!I!WhatIsay,\'hervoicesprangintoflame,`Isaybecauseitistrue,doyousee,becauseyouareyou,afoulandfalseliar,awhitedsepulchre。That\'swhyIsayit。Andyouhearit。\'

  `Andbegrateful,\'headded,withasatiricalgrimace。

  `Yes,\'shecried,`andifyouhaveasparkofdecencyinyou,begrateful。\'

  `Nothavingasparkofdecency,however——\'heretorted。

  `No,\'shecried,`youhaven\'taspark。Andsoyoucangoyourway,andI\'llgomine。It\'snogood,nottheslightest。Soyoucanleavemenow,Idon\'twanttogoanyfurtherwithyou——leaveme——\'

  `Youdon\'tevenknowwhereyouare,\'hesaid。

  `Oh,don\'tbother,IassureyouIshallbeallright。I\'vegottenshillingsinmypurse,andthatwilltakemebackfromanywhereyouhavebroughtmeto。\'Shehesitated。Theringswerestillonherfingers,twoonherlittlefinger,oneonherringfinger。Stillshehesitated。

  `Verygood,\'hesaid。`Theonlyhopelessthingisafool。\'

  `Youarequiteright,\'shesaid。

  Stillshehesitated。Thenanugly,malevolentlookcameoverherface,shepulledtheringsfromherfingers,andtossedthemathim。Onetouchedhisface,theothershithiscoat,andtheyscatteredintothemud。

  `Andtakeyourrings,\'shesaid,`andgoandbuyyourselfafemaleelsewhere——thereareplentytobehad,whowillbequitegladtoshareyourspiritualmess,——ortohaveyourphysicalmess,andleaveyourspiritualmesstoHermione。\'

  Withwhichshewalkedaway,desultorily,uptheroad。Hestoodmotionless,watchinghersullen,ratheruglywalk。Shewassullenlypickingandpullingatthetwigsofthehedgeasshepassed。Shegrewsmaller,sheseemedtopassoutofhissight。Adarknesscameoverhismind。Onlyasmall,mechanicalspeckofconsciousnesshoverednearhim。

  Hefelttiredandweak。Yetalsohewasrelieved。Hegaveuphisoldposition。Hewentandsatonthebank。NodoubtUrsulawasright。Itwastrue,really,whatshesaid。Heknewthathisspiritualitywasconcomitantofaprocessofdepravity,asortofpleasureinself—destruction。Therereallywasacertainstimulantinself—destruction,forhim——especiallywhenitwastranslatedspiritually。Butthenheknewit——heknewit,andhaddone。AndwasnotUrsula\'swayofemotionalintimacy,emotionalandphysical,wasitnotjustasdangerousasHermione\'sabstractspiritualintimacy?Fusion,fusion,thishorriblefusionoftwobeings,whicheverywomanandmostmeninsistedon,wasitnotnauseousandhorribleanyhow,whetheritwasafusionofthespiritoroftheemotionalbody?HermionesawherselfastheperfectIdea,towhichallmenmustcome:AndUrsulawastheperfectWomb,thebathofbirth,towhichallmenmustcome!Andbothwerehorrible。Whycouldtheynotremainindividuals,limitedbytheirownlimits?Whythisdreadfulall—comprehensiveness,thishatefultyranny?

  Whynotleavetheotherbeing,free,whytrytoabsorb,ormelt,ormerge?

  Onemightabandononeselfutterlytothemoments,butnottoanyotherbeing。

  Hecouldnotbeartoseetheringslyinginthepalemudoftheroad。

  Hepickedthemup,andwipedthemunconsciouslyonhishands。Theywerethelittletokensoftherealityofbeauty,therealityofhappinessinwarmcreation。Buthehadmadehishandsalldirtyandgritty。

  Therewasadarknessoverhismind。Theterribleknotofconsciousnessthathadpersistedtherelikeanobsessionwasbroken,gone,hislifewasdissolvedindarknessoverhislimbsandhisbody。Buttherewasapointofanxietyinhisheartnow。Hewantedhertocomeback。Hebreathedlightlyandregularlylikeaninfant,thatbreathesinnocently,beyondthetouchofresponsibility。

  Shewascomingback。Hesawherdriftingdesultorilyunderthehighhedge,advancingtowardshimslowly。Hedidnotmove,hedidnotlookagain。

  Hewasasifasleep,atpeace,slumberingandutterlyrelaxed。

  Shecameupandstoodbeforehim,hangingherhead。

  `SeewhataflowerIfoundyou,\'shesaid,wistfullyholdingapieceofpurple—redbell—heatherunderhisface。Hesawtheclumpofcolouredbells,andthetree—like,tinybranch:alsoherhands,withtheirover—fine,over—sensitiveskin。

  `Pretty!\'hesaid,lookingupatherwithasmile,takingtheflower。

  Everythinghadbecomesimpleagain,quitesimple,thecomplexitygoneintonowhere。Buthebadlywantedtocry:exceptthathewaswearyandboredbyemotion。

  Thenahotpassionoftendernessforherfilledhisheart。Hestoodupandlookedintoherface。Itwasnewandoh,sodelicateinitsluminouswonderandfear。Heputhisarmsroundher,andshehidherfaceonhisshoulder。

  Itwaspeace,justsimplepeace,ashestoodfoldingherquietlythereontheopenlane。Itwaspeaceatlast。Theold,detestableworldoftensionhadpassedawayatlast,hissoulwasstrongandatease。

  Shelookedupathim。Thewonderfulyellowlightinhereyesnowwassoftandyielded,theywereatpeacewitheachother。Hekissedher,softly,many,manytimes。Alaughcameintohereyes。

  `DidIabuseyou?\'sheasked。

  Hesmiledtoo,andtookherhand,thatwassosoftandgiven。

  `Nevermind,\'shesaid,`itisallforthegood。\'Hekissedheragain,softly,manytimes。

  `Isn\'tit?\'shesaid。

  `Certainly,\'hereplied。`Wait!Ishallhavemyownback。\'

  Shelaughedsuddenly,withawildcatchinhervoice,andflungherarmsaroundhim。

  `Youaremine,mylove,aren\'tyou?\'shecriedstraininghimclose。

  `Yes,\'hesaid,softly。

  Hisvoicewassosoftandfinal,shewentverystill,asifunderafatewhichhadtakenher。Yes,sheacquiesced——butitwasaccomplishedwithoutheracquiescence。Hewaskissingherquietly,repeatedly,withasoft,stillhappinessthatalmostmadeherheartstopbeating。

  `Mylove!\'shecried,liftingherfaceandlookingwithfrightened,gentlewonderofbliss。Wasitallreal?Buthiseyeswerebeautifulandsoftandimmunefromstressorexcitement,beautifulandsmilinglightlytoher,smilingwithher。Shehidherfaceonhisshoulder,hidingbeforehim,becausehecouldseehersocompletely。Sheknewhelovedher,andshewasafraid,shewasinastrangeelement,anewheavenroundabouther。Shewishedhewerepassionate,becauseinpassionshewasathome。

  Butthiswassostillandfrail,asspaceismorefrighteningthanforce。

  Again,quickly,sheliftedherhead。

  `Doyouloveme?\'shesaid,quickly,impulsively。

  `Yes,\'hereplied,notheedinghermotion,onlyherstillness。

  Sheknewitwastrue。Shebrokeaway。

  `Soyouought,\'shesaid,turningroundtolookattheroad。`Didyoufindtherings?\'

  `Yes。\'

  `Wherearethey?\'

  `Inmypocket。\'

  Sheputherhandintohispocketandtookthemout。

  Shewasrestless。

  `Shallwego?\'shesaid。

  `Yes,\'heanswered。Andtheymountedtothecaroncemore,andleftbehindthemthismemorablebattle—field。

  Theydriftedthroughthewild,lateafternoon,inabeautifulmotionthatwassmilingandtranscendent。Hismindwassweetlyatease,thelifeflowedthroughhimasfromsomenewfountain,hewasasifbornoutofthecrampofawomb。

  `Areyouhappy?\'sheaskedhim,inherstrange,delightedway。

  `Yes,\'hesaid。

  `SoamI,\'shecriedinsuddenecstacy,puttingherarmroundhimandclutchinghimviolentlyagainsther,ashesteeredthemotor—car。

  `Don\'tdrivemuchmore,\'shesaid。`Idon\'twantyoutobealwaysdoingsomething。\'

  `No,\'hesaid。`We\'llfinishthislittletrip,andthenwe\'llbefree。\'

  `Wewill,mylove,wewill,\'shecriedindelight,kissinghimasheturnedtoher。

  Hedroveoninastrangenewwakefulness,thetensionofhisconsciousnessbroken。Heseemedtobeconsciousallover,allhisbodyawakewithasimple,glimmeringawareness,asifhehadjustcomeawake,likeathingthatisborn,likeabirdwhenitcomesoutofanegg,intoanewuniverse。

  Theydroppeddownalonghillinthedusk,andsuddenlyUrsularecognisedonherrighthand,belowinthehollow,theformofSouthwellMinster。

  `Arewehere!\'shecriedwithpleasure。

  Therigid,sombre,uglycathedralwassettlingunderthegloomofthecomingnight,astheyenteredthenarrowtown,thegoldenlightsshowedlikeslabsofrevelation,intheshop—windows。

  `Fathercameherewithmother,\'shesaid,`whentheyfirstkneweachother。Helovesit——helovestheMinster。Doyou?\'

  `Yes。Itlookslikequartzcrystalsstickingupoutofthedarkhollow。

  We\'llhaveourhighteaattheSaracen\'sHead。\'

  Astheydescended,theyheardtheMinsterbellsplayingahymn,whenthehourhadstrucksix。GlorytotheemyGodthisnightForalltheblessingsofthelight——So,toUrsula\'sear,thetunefellout,dropbydrop,fromtheunseenskyontotheduskytown。Itwaslikedim,bygonecenturiessounding。Itwasallsofaroff。Shestoodintheoldyardoftheinn,smellingofstrawandstablesandpetrol。Above,shecouldseethefirststars。Whatwasitall?

  Thiswasnoactualworld,itwasthedream—worldofone\'schildhood——

  agreatcircumscribedreminiscence。Theworldhadbecomeunreal。Sheherselfwasastrange,transcendentreality。

  Theysattogetherinalittleparlourbythefire。

  `Isittrue?\'shesaid,wondering。

  `What?\'

  `Everything——iseverythingtrue?\'

  `Thebestistrue,\'hesaid,grimacingather。

  `Isit?\'shereplied,laughing,butunassured。

  Shelookedathim。Heseemedstillsoseparate。Neweyeswereopenedinhersoul。Shesawastrangecreaturefromanotherworld,inhim。Itwasasifshewereenchanted,andeverythingweremetamorphosed。SherecalledagaintheoldmagicoftheBookofGenesis,wherethesonsofGodsawthedaughtersofmen,thattheywerefair。Andhewasoneofthese,oneofthesestrangecreaturesfromthebeyond,lookingdownather,andseeingshewasfair。

  Hestoodonthehearth—ruglookingather,atherfacethatwasupturnedexactlylikeaflower,afresh,luminousflower,glintingfaintlygoldenwiththedewofthefirstlight。Andhewassmilingfaintlyasiftherewerenospeechintheworld,savethesilentdelightofflowersineachother。Smilinglytheydelightedineachother\'spresence,purepresence,nottobethoughtof,evenknown。Buthiseyeshadafaintlyironicalcontraction。

  Andshewasdrawntohimstrangely,asinaspell。Kneelingonthehearth—rugbeforehim,sheputherarmsroundhisloins,andputherfaceagainsthisthigh。Riches!Riches!Shewasoverwhelmedwithasenseofaheavenfulofriches。

  `Weloveeachother,\'shesaidindelight。

  `Morethanthat,\'heanswered,lookingdownatherwithhisglimmering,easyface。

  Unconsciously,withhersensitivefingertips,shewastracingthebackofhisthighs,followingsomemysteriouslife—flowthere。Shehaddiscoveredsomething,somethingmorethanwonderful,morewonderfulthanlifeitself。

  Itwasthestrangemysteryofhislife—motion,there,atthebackofthethighs,downtheflanks。Itwasastrangerealityofhisbeing,theverystuffofbeing,thereinthestraightdownflowofthethighs。ItwashereshediscoveredhimoneofthesonsofGodsuchaswereinthebeginningoftheworld,notaman,somethingother,somethingmore。

  Thiswasreleaseatlast。Shehadhadlovers,shehadknownpassion。

  Butthiswasneitherlovenorpassion。ItwasthedaughtersofmencomingbacktothesonsofGod,thestrangeinhumansonsofGodwhoareinthebeginning。

  Herfacewasnowonedazzleofreleased,goldenlight,asshelookedupathim,andlaidherhandsfullonhisthighs,behind,ashestoodbeforeher。Helookeddownatherwitharichbrightbrowlikeadiademabovehiseyes。Shewasbeautifulasanewmarvellousfloweropenedathisknees,aparadisalflowershewas,beyondwomanhood,suchaflowerofluminousness。

  Yetsomethingwastightandunfreeinhim。Hedidnotlikethiscrouching,thisradiance——notaltogether。

  Itwasallachieved,forher。ShehadfoundoneofthesonsofGodfromtheBeginning,andhehadfoundoneofthefirstmostluminousdaughtersofmen。

  Shetracedwithherhandsthelineofhisloinsandthighs,attheback,andalivingfireranthroughher,fromhim,darkly。Itwasadarkfloodofelectricpassionshereleasedfromhim,drewintoherself。Shehadestablishedarichnewcircuit,anewcurrentofpassionalelectricenergy,betweenthetwoofthem,releasedfromthedarkestpolesofthebodyandestablishedinperfectcircuit。Itwasadarkfireofelectricitythatrushedfromhimtoher,andfloodedthembothwithrichpeace,satisfaction。

  `Mylove,\'shecried,liftingherfacetohim,hereyes,hermouthopenintransport。

  `Mylove,\'heanswered,bendingandkissingher,alwayskissingher。

  Sheclosedherhandsoverthefull,roundedbodyofhisloins,ashestoopedoverher,sheseemedtotouchthequickofthemysteryofdarknessthatwasbodilyhim。Sheseemedtofaintbeneath,andheseemedtofaint,stoopingoverher。Itwasaperfectpassingawayforbothofthem,andatthesametimethemostintolerableaccessionintobeing,themarvellousfullnessofimmediategratification,overwhelming,out—floodingfromthesourceofthedeepestlife—force,thedarkest,deepest,strangestlife—sourceofthehumanbody,atthebackandbaseoftheloins。

  Afteralapseofstillness,aftertheriversofstrangedarkfluidrichnesshadpassedoverher,flooding,carryingawayhermindandfloodingdownherspineanddownherknees,pastherfeet,astrangeflood,sweepingawayeverythingandleavingheranessentialnewbeing,shewasleftquitefree,shewasfreeincompleteease,hercompleteself。Sosherose,stillyandblithe,smilingathim。Hestoodbeforeher,glimmering,soawfullyreal,thatherheartalmoststoppedbeating。Hestoodthereinhisstrange,wholebody,thathaditsmarvellousfountains,likethebodiesofthesonsofGodwhowereinthebeginning。Therewerestrangefountainsofhisbody,moremysteriousandpotentthananyshehadimaginedorknown,moresatisfying,ah,finally,mystically—physicallysatisfying。Shehadthoughttherewasnosourcedeeperthanthephallicsource。Andnow,behold,fromthesmittenrockoftheman\'sbody,fromthestrangemarvellousflanksandthighs,deeper,furtherinmysterythanthephallicsource,camethefloodsofineffabledarknessandineffableriches。

  Theywereglad,andtheycouldforgetperfectly。Theylaughed,andwenttothemealprovided。Therewasavenisonpasty,ofallthings,alargebroad—facedcutham,eggsandcressesandredbeet—root,andmedlarsandapple—tart,andtea。

  `Whatgoodthings!\'shecriedwithpleasure。`Hownobleitlooks!

  ——shallIpouroutthetea?——\'

  Shewasusuallynervousanduncertainatperformingthesepublicduties,suchasgivingtea。Buttodaysheforgot,shewasatherease,entirelyforgettingtohavemisgivings。Thetea—potpouredbeautifullyfromaproudslenderspout。Hereyeswerewarmwithsmilesasshegavehimhistea。

  Shehadlearnedatlasttobestillandperfect。

  `Everythingisours,\'shesaidtohim。

  `Everything,\'heanswered。

  Shegaveaqueerlittlecrowingsoundoftriumph。

  `I\'msoglad!\'shecried,withunspeakablerelief。

  `SoamI,\'hesaid。`ButI\'mthinkingwe\'dbettergetoutofourresponsibilitiesasquickaswecan。\'

  `Whatresponsibilities?\'sheasked,wondering。

  `Wemustdropourjobs,likeashot。\'

  Anewunderstandingdawnedintoherface。

  `Ofcourse,\'shesaid,`there\'sthat。\'

  `Wemustgetout,\'hesaid。`There\'snothingforitbuttogetout,quick。\'

  Shelookedathimdoubtfullyacrossthetable。

  `Butwhere?\'shesaid。

  `Idon\'tknow,\'hesaid。`We\'lljustwanderaboutforabit。\'

  Againshelookedathimquizzically。

  `IshouldbeperfectlyhappyattheMill,\'shesaid。

  `It\'sveryneartheoldthing,\'hesaid。`Letuswanderabit。\'

  Hisvoicecouldbesosoftandhappy—go—lucky,itwentthroughherveinslikeanexhilaration。Neverthelessshedreamedofavalley,andwildgardens,andpeace。Shehadadesiretooforsplendour——anaristocraticextravagantsplendour。Wanderingseemedtoherlikerestlessness,dissatisfaction。

  `Wherewillyouwanderto?\'sheasked。

  `Idon\'tknow。IfeelasifIwouldjustmeetyouandwe\'dsetoff——

  justtowardsthedistance。\'

  `Butwherecanonego?\'sheaskedanxiously。`Afterall,thereisonlytheworld,andnoneofitisverydistant。\'

  `Still,\'hesaid,`Ishouldliketogowithyou——nowhere。Itwouldberatherwanderingjusttonowhere。That\'stheplacetogetto——nowhere。

  Onewantstowanderawayfromtheworld\'ssomewheres,intoourownnowhere。\'

  Stillshemeditated。

  `Yousee,mylove,\'shesaid,`I\'msoafraidthatwhileweareonlypeople,we\'vegottotaketheworldthat\'sgiven——becausethereisn\'tanyother。\'

  `Yesthereis,\'hesaid。`There\'ssomewherewherewecanbefree——

  somewherewhereoneneedn\'twearmuchclothes——noneeven——whereonemeetsafewpeoplewhohavegonethroughenough,andcantakethingsforgranted——whereyoubeyourself,withoutbothering。Thereissomewhere——thereareoneortwopeople——\'

  `Butwhere——?\'shesighed。

  `Somewhere——anywhere。Let\'swanderoff。That\'sthethingtodo——

  let\'swanderoff。\'

  `Yes——\'shesaid,thrilledatthethoughtoftravel。Buttoheritwasonlytravel。

  `Tobefree,\'hesaid。`Tobefree,inafreeplace,withafewotherpeople!\'

  `Yes,\'shesaidwistfully。Those`fewotherpeople\'depressedher。

  `Itisn\'treallyalocality,though,\'hesaid。`It\'saperfectedrelationbetweenyouandme,andothers——theperfectrelation——sothatwearefreetogether。\'

  `Itis,mylove,isn\'tit,\'shesaid。`It\'syouandme。It\'syouandme,isn\'tit?\'Shestretchedoutherarmstohim。Hewentacrossandstoopedtokissherface。Herarmsclosedroundhimagain,herhandsspreaduponhisshoulders,movingslowlythere,movingslowlyonhisback,downhisbackslowly,withastrangerecurrent,rhythmicmotion,yetmovingslowlydown,pressingmysteriouslyoverhisloins,overhisflanks。Thesenseoftheawfulnessofrichesthatcouldneverbeimpairedfloodedhermindlikeaswoon,adeathinmostmarvellouspossession,mystic—sure。Shepossessedhimsoutterlyandintolerably,thatsheherselflapsedout。Andyetshewasonlysittingstillinthechair,withherhandspresseduponhim,andlost。

  Againhesoftlykissedher。

  `Weshallnevergoapartagain,\'hemurmuredquietly。Andshedidnotspeak,butonlypressedherhandsfirmerdownuponthesourceofdarknessinhim。

  Theydecided,whentheywokeagainfromthepureswoon,towritetheirresignationsfromtheworldofworkthereandthen。Shewantedthis。

  Herangthebell,andorderednote—paperwithoutaprintedaddress。

  Thewaiterclearedthetable。

  `Nowthen,\'hesaid,`yoursfirst。Putyourhomeaddress,andthedate——then\"DirectorofEducation,TownHall——Sir——\"Nowthen!——Idon\'tknowhowonereallystands——Isupposeonecouldgetoutofitinlessthanmonth——Anyhow\"Sir——IbegtoresignmypostasclassmistressintheWilleyGreenGrammarSchool。Ishouldbeverygratefulifyouwouldliberatemeassoonaspossible,withoutwaitingfortheexpirationofthemonth\'snotice。\"That\'lldo。Haveyougotit?Letmelook。\"UrsulaBrangwen。\"Good!NowI\'llwritemine。Ioughttogivethemthreemonths,butIcanpleadhealth。Icanarrangeitallright。\'

  Hesatandwroteouthisformalresignation。

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