OldMr。Rivers，shesaid，wasaplainmanenough，butagentleman，andofasancientafamilyascouldbefound。MarshEndhadbelongedtotheRiverseversinceitwasahouse:anditwas，sheaffirmed，“aboontwohundredyearold—forallitlookedbutasmall，humbleplace，naughttocomparewi’Mr。Oliver’sgrandhalldowni’MortonVale。ButshecouldrememberBillOliver’sfatherajourneymanneedlemaker;andth’Riversworgentryi’th’owddayso’th’Henrys，asonybodymightseebylookingintoth’registersi’MortonChurchvestry。”Still，sheallowed，“theowdmaisterwaslikeotherfolk—naughtmichouto’t’commonway:starkmado’shooting，andfarming，andsichlike。”Themistresswasdifferent。Shewasagreatreader，andstudiedadeal;andthe“bairns”hadtakenafterher。Therewasnothinglikethemintheseparts，noreverhadbeen;theyhadlikedlearning，allthree，almostfromthetimetheycouldspeak;andtheyhadalwaysbeen“ofamak’oftheirown。”Mr。St。John，whenhegrewup，wouldgotocollegeandbeaparson;andthegirls，assoonastheyleftschool，wouldseekplacesasgovernesses:fortheyhadtoldhertheirfatherhadsomeyearsagolostagreatdealofmoneybyamanhehadtrustedturningbankrupt;andashewasnownotrichenoughtogivethemfortunes，theymustprovideforthemselves。Theyhadlivedverylittleathomeforalongwhile，andwereonlycomenowtostayafewweeksonaccountoftheirfather’sdeath;buttheydidsolikeMarshEndandMorton，andallthesemoorsandhillsabout。TheyhadbeeninLondon，andmanyothergrandtowns;buttheyalwayssaidtherewasnoplacelikehome;andthentheyweresoagreeablewitheachother—neverfelloutnor“threaped。”Shedidnotknowwheretherewassuchafamilyforbeingunited。
Havingfinishedmytaskofgooseberrypicking，Iaskedwherethetwoladiesandtheirbrotherwerenow。
“GoneovertoMortonforawalk;buttheywouldbebackinhalf—an—hourtotea。”
TheyreturnedwithinthetimeHannahhadallottedthem:theyenteredbythekitchendoor。Mr。St。John，whenhesawme，merelybowedandpassedthrough;thetwoladiesstopped:Mary，inafewwords，kindlyandcalmlyexpressedthepleasureshefeltinseeingmewellenoughtobeabletocomedown;Dianatookmyhand:sheshookherheadatme。
“Youshouldhavewaitedformyleavetodescend，”shesaid。“Youstilllookverypale—andsothin！Poorchild！—poorgirl！”
Dianahadavoicetoned，tomyear，likethecooingofadove。ShepossessedeyeswhosegazeIdelightedtoencounter。Herwholefaceseemedtomefillofcharm。Mary’scountenancewasequallyintelligent—herfeaturesequallypretty;butherexpressionwasmorereserved，andhermanners，thoughgentle，moredistant。Dianalookedandspokewithacertainauthority:shehadawill，evidently。Itwasmynaturetofeelpleasureinyieldingtoanauthoritysupportedlikehers，andtobend，wheremyconscienceandself—respectpermitted，toanactivewill。
“Andwhatbusinesshaveyouhere？”shecontinued。“Itisnotyourplace。MaryandIsitinthekitchensometimes，becauseathomeweliketobefree，eventolicense—butyouareavisitor，andmustgointotheparlour。”
“Iamverywellhere。”
“Notatall，withHannahbustlingaboutandcoveringyouwithflour。”
“Besides，thefireistoohotforyou，”interposedMary。
“Tobesure，”addedhersister。“Come，youmustbeobedient。”Andstillholdingmyhandshemademerise，andledmeintotheinnerroom。
“Sitthere，”shesaid，placingmeonthesofa，“whilewetakeourthingsoffandgettheteaready;itisanotherprivilegeweexerciseinourlittlemoorlandhome—toprepareourownmealswhenwearesoinclined，orwhenHannahisbaking，brewing，washing，orironing。”
Sheclosedthedoor，leavingmesoluswithMr。St。John，whosatopposite，abookornewspaperinhishand。Iexaminedfirst，theparlour，andthenitsoccupant。
Theparlourwasratherasmallroom，veryplainlyfurnished，yetcomfortable，becausecleanandneat。Theold—fashionedchairswereverybright，andthewalnut—woodtablewaslikealooking—glass。Afewstrange，antiqueportraitsofthemenandwomenofotherdaysdecoratedthestainedwalls;acupboardwithglassdoorscontainedsomebooksandanancientsetofchina。Therewasnosuperfluousornamentintheroom—notonemodernpieceoffurniture，saveabraceofworkboxesandalady’sdeskinrosewood，whichstoodonaside—table:everything—includingthecarpetandcurtains—lookedatoncewellwornandwellsaved。
Mr。St。John—sittingasstillasoneofthedustypicturesonthewalls，keepinghiseyesfixedonthepageheperused，andhislipsmutelysealed—waseasyenoughtoexamine。Hadhebeenastatueinsteadofaman，hecouldnothavebeeneasier。Hewasyoung—perhapsfromtwenty—eighttothirty—tall，slender;hisfacerivetedtheeye;itwaslikeaGreekface，verypureinoutline:quiteastraight，classicnose;quiteanAthenianmouthandchin。Itisseldom，indeed，anEnglishfacecomessoneartheantiquemodelsasdidhis。Hemightwellbealittleshockedattheirregularityofmylineaments，hisownbeingsoharmonious。Hiseyeswerelargeandblue，withbrownlashes;hishighforehead，colourlessasivory，waspartiallystreakedoverbycarelesslocksoffairhair。
Thisisagentledelineation，isitnot，reader？Yethewhomitdescribesscarcelyimpressedonewiththeideaofagentle，ayielding，animpressible，orevenofaplacidnature。Quiescentashenowsat，therewassomethingabouthisnostril，hismouth，hisbrow，which，tomyperceptions，indicatedelementswithineitherrestless，orhard，oreager。Hedidnotspeaktomeoneword，norevendirecttomeoneglance，tillhissistersreturned。Diana，asshepassedinandout，inthecourseofpreparingtea，broughtmealittlecake，bakedonthetopoftheoven。
“Eatthatnow，”shesaid:“youmustbehungry。Hannahsaysyouhavehadnothingbutsomegruelsincebreakfast。”
Ididnotrefuseit，formyappetitewasawakenedandkeen。Mr。Riversnowclosedhisbook，approachedthetable，and，ashetookaseat，fixedhisbluepictorial—lookingeyesfullonme。Therewasanunceremoniousdirectness，asearching，decidedsteadfastnessinhisgazenow，whichtoldthatintention，andnotdiffidence，hadhithertokeptitavertedfromthestranger。
“Youareveryhungry，”hesaid。
“Iam，sir。”Itismyway—italwayswasmyway，byinstinct—evertomeetthebriefwithbrevity，thedirectwithplainness。
“Itiswellforyouthatalowfeverhasforcedyoutoabstainforthelastthreedays:therewouldhavebeendangerinyieldingtothecravingsofyourappetiteatfirst。Nowyoumayeat，thoughstillnotimmoderately。”
“ItrustIshallnoteatlongatyourexpense，sir，”wasmyveryclumsily—contrived，unpolishedanswer。
“No，”hesaidcoolly:“whenyouhaveindicatedtoustheresidenceofyourfriends，wecanwritetothem，andyoumayberestoredtohome。”
“That，Imustplainlytellyou，isoutofmypowertodo;beingabsolutelywithouthomeandfriends。”
Thethreelookedatme，butnotdistrustfully;Ifelttherewasnosuspicionintheirglances:therewasmoreofcuriosity。Ispeakparticularlyoftheyoungladies。St。John’seyes，thoughclearenoughinaliteralsense，inafigurativeoneweredifficulttofathom。Heseemedtousethemratherasinstrumentstosearchotherpeople’sthoughts，thanasagentstorevealhisown:thewhichcombinationofkeennessandreservewasconsiderablymorecalculatedtoembarrassthantoencourage。
“Doyoumeantosay，”heasked，“thatyouarecompletelyisolatedfromeveryconnection？”
“Ido。Notatielinksmetoanylivingthing:notaclaimdoIpossesstoadmittanceunderanyroofinEngland。”
“Amostsingularpositionatyourage！”
HereIsawhisglancedirectedtomyhands，whichwerefoldedonthetablebeforeme。Iwonderedwhathesoughtthere:hiswordssoonexplainedthequest。
“Youhaveneverbeenmarried？Youareaspinster？”
Dianalaughed。“Why，shecan’theaboveseventeenoreighteenyearsold，St。John，”saidshe。
“Iamnearnineteen:butIamnotmarried。No。”
Ifeltaburningglowmounttomyface;forbitterandagitatingrecollectionswereawakenedbytheallusiontomarriage。Theyallsawtheembarrassmentandtheemotion。DianaandMaryrelievedmebyturningtheireyeselsewherethantomycrimsonedvisage;butthecolderandsternerbrothercontinuedtogaze，tillthetroublehehadexcitedforcedouttearsaswellascolour。
“Wheredidyoulastreside？”henowasked。
“Youaretooinquisitive，St。John，”murmuredMaryinalowvoice;butheleanedoverthetableandrequiredananswerbyasecondfirmandpiercinglook。
“Thenameoftheplacewhere，andofthepersonwithwhomIlived，ismysecret，”Irepliedconcisely。
“Which，ifyoulike，youhave，inmyopinion，arighttokeep，bothfromSt。Johnandeveryotherquestioner，”remarkedDiana。
“YetifIknownothingaboutyouoryourhistory，Icannothelpyou，”hesaid。“Andyouneedhelp，doyounot？”
“Ineedit，andIseekitsofar，sir，thatsometruephilanthropistwillputmeinthewayofgettingworkwhichIcando，andtheremunerationforwhichwillkeepme，ifbutinthebarestnecessariesoflife。”
“IknownotwhetherIamatruephilanthropist;yetIamwillingtoaidyoutotheutmostofmypowerinapurposesohonest。First，then，tellmewhatyouhavebeenaccustomedtodo，andwhatyoucando。”
Ihadnowswallowedmytea。Iwasmightilyrefreshedbythebeverage;asmuchsoasagiantwithwine:itgavenewtonetomyunstrungnerves，andenabledmetoaddressthispenetratingyoungjudgesteadily。
“Mr。Rivers，”Isaid，turningtohim，andlookingathim，ashelookedatme，openlyandwithoutdiffidence，“youandyoursistershavedonemeagreatservice—thegreatestmancandohisfellow—being;youhaverescuedme，byyournoblehospitality，fromdeath。Thisbenefitconferredgivesyouanunlimitedclaimonmygratitude，andaclaim，toacertainextent，onmyconfidence。Iwilltellyouasmuchofthehistoryofthewandereryouhaveharboured，asIcantellwithoutcompromisingmyownpeaceofmind—myownsecurity，moralandphysical，andthatofothers。
“Iamanorphan，thedaughterofaclergyman。MyparentsdiedbeforeIcouldknowthem。Iwasbroughtupadependant;educatedinacharitableinstitution。Iwilleventellyouthenameoftheestablishment，whereIpassedsixyearsasapupil，andtwoasateacher—LowoodOrphanAsylum，—shire:youwillhaveheardofit，Mr。Rivers？—theRev。RobertBrocklehurstisthetreasurer。”
“IhaveheardofMr。Brocklehurst，andIhaveseentheschool。”
“IleftLowoodnearlyayearsincetobecomeaprivategoverness。Iobtainedagoodsituation，andwashappy。ThisplaceIwasobligedtoleavefourdaysbeforeIcamehere。ThereasonofmydepartureIcannotandoughtnottoexplain:itwouldbeuseless，dangerous，andwouldsoundincredible。Noblameattachedtome:Iamasfreefromculpabilityasanyoneofyouthree。MiserableIam，andmustbeforatime;forthecatastrophewhichdrovemefromahouseIhadfoundaparadisewasofastrangeanddirefulnature。Iobservedbuttwopointsinplanningmydeparture—speed，secrecy:tosecurethese，IhadtoleavebehindmeeverythingIpossessedexceptasmallparcel;which，inmyhurryandtroubleofmind，IforgottotakeoutofthecoachthatbroughtmetoWhitcross。Tothisneighbourhood，then，Icame，quitedestitute。Islepttwonightsintheopenair，andwanderedabouttwodayswithoutcrossingathreshold:buttwiceinthatspaceoftimedidItastefood;anditwaswhenbroughtbyhunger，exhaustion，anddespairalmosttothelastgasp，thatyou，Mr。Rivers，forbademetoperishofwantatyourdoor，andtookmeundertheshelterofyourroof。Iknowallyoursistershavedoneformesince—forIhavenotbeeninsensibleduringmyseemingtorpor—andIowetotheirspontaneous，genuine，genialcompassionaslargeadebtastoyourevangelicalcharity。”
“Don’tmakehertalkanymorenow，St。John，”saidDiana，asIpaused;“sheisevidentlynotyetfitforexcitement。Cometothesofaandsitdownnow，MissElliott。”
Igaveaninvoluntaryhalfstartathearingthealias:Ihadforgottenmynewname。Mr。Rivers，whomnothingseemedtoescape，noticeditatonce。
“YousaidyournamewasJaneElliott？”heobserved。
“Ididsayso;anditisthenamebywhichIthinkitexpedienttobecalledatpresent，butitisnotmyrealname，andwhenIhearit，itsoundsstrangetome。”
“Yourrealnameyouwillnotgive？”
“No:Ifeardiscoveryaboveallthings;andwhateverdisclosurewouldleadtoit，Iavoid。”
“Youarequiteright，Iamsure，”saidDiana。“Nowdo，brother，letherbeatpeaceawhile。”
ButwhenSt。Johnhadmusedafewmomentsherecommencedasimperturbablyandwithasmuchacumenasever。
“Youwouldnotliketobelongdependentonourhospitality—youwouldwish，Isee，todispenseassoonasmaybewithmysisters’compassion，and，aboveall，withmycharity（Iamquitesensibleofthedistinctiondrawn，nordoIresentit—itisjust）:youdesiretobeindependentofus？”
“Ido:Ihavealreadysaidso。Showmehowtowork，orhowtoseekwork:thatisallInowask;thenletmego，ifitbebuttothemeanestcottage;buttillthen，allowmetostayhere:Idreadanotheressayofthehorrorsofhomelessdestitution。”
“Indeedyoushallstayhere，”saidDiana，puttingherwhitehandonmyhead。“Youshall，”repeatedMary，inthetoneofundemonstrativesinceritywhichseemednaturaltoher。
“Mysisters，yousee，haveapleasureinkeepingyou，”saidMr。St。John，“astheywouldhaveapleasureinkeepingandcherishingahalf—frozenbird，somewintrywindmighthavedriventhroughtheircasement。Ifeelmoreinclinationtoputyouinthewayofkeepingyourself，andshallendeavourtodoso;butobserve，mysphereisnarrow。Iambuttheincumbentofapoorcountryparish:myaidmustbeofthehumblestsort。Andifyouareinclinedtodespisethedayofsmallthings，seeksomemoreefficientsuccourthansuchasIcanoffer。”
“Shehasalreadysaidthatsheiswillingtodoanythinghonestshecando，”answeredDianaforme;“andyouknow，St。John，shehasnochoiceofhelpers:sheisforcedtoputupwithsuchcrustypeopleasyou。”
“Iwillbeadressmaker;Iwillbeaplain—workwoman;Iwillbeaservant，anurse—girl，ifIcanbenobetter，”Ianswered。
“Right，”saidMr。St。John，quitecoolly。“Ifsuchisyourspirit，Ipromisetoaidyou，inmyowntimeandway。”
Henowresumedthebookwithwhichhehadbeenoccupiedbeforetea。Isoonwithdrew，forIhadtalkedasmuch，andsatupaslong，asmypresentstrengthwouldpermit。
Chapter30
ThemoreIknewoftheinmatesofMoorHouse，thebetterIlikedthem。InafewdaysIhadsofarrecoveredmyhealththatIcouldsitupallday，andwalkoutsometimes。IcouldjoinwithDianaandMaryinalltheiroccupations;conversewiththemasmuchastheywished，andaidthemwhenandwheretheywouldallowme。Therewasarevivingpleasureinthisintercourse，ofakindnowtastedbymeforthefirsttime—thepleasurearisingfromperfectcongenialityoftastes，sentiments，andprinciples。
Ilikedtoreadwhattheylikedtoread:whattheyenjoyed，delightedme;whattheyapproved，Ireverenced。Theylovedtheirsequesteredhome。I，too，inthegrey，small，antiquestructure，withitslowroof，itslatticedcasements，itsmoulderingwalls，itsavenueofagedfirs—allgrownaslantunderthestressofmountainwinds;itsgarden，darkwithyewandholly—andwherenoflowersbutofthehardiestspecieswouldbloom—foundacharmbothpotentandpermanent。Theyclungtothepurplemoorsbehindandaroundtheirdwelling—tothehollowvaleintowhichthepebblybridle—pathleadingfromtheirgatedescended，andwhichwoundbetweenfern—banksfirst，andthenamongstafewofthewildestlittlepasture—fieldsthateverborderedawildernessofheath，orgavesustenancetoaflockofgreymoorlandsheep，withtheirlittlemossy—facedlambs:—theyclungtothisscene，Isay，withaperfectenthusiasmofattachment。Icouldcomprehendthefeeling，andsharebothitsstrengthandtruth。Isawthefascinationofthelocality。Ifelttheconsecrationofitsloneliness:myeyefeastedontheoutlineofswellandsweep—onthewildcolouringcommunicatedtoridgeanddellbymoss，byheath—bell，byflower—sprinkledturf，bybrilliantbracken，andmellowgranitecrag。Thesedetailswerejusttomewhattheyweretothem—somanypureandsweetsourcesofpleasure。Thestrongblastandthesoftbreeze;theroughandthehalcyonday;thehoursofsunriseandsunset;themoonlightandthecloudednight，developedforme，intheseregions，thesameattractionasforthem—woundroundmyfacultiesthesamespellthatentrancedtheirs。
Indoorsweagreedequallywell。TheywerebothmoreaccomplishedandbetterreadthanIwas;butwitheagernessIfollowedinthepathofknowledgetheyhadtroddenbeforeme。Idevouredthebookstheylentme:thenitwasfullsatisfactiontodiscusswiththemintheeveningwhatIhadperusedduringtheday。Thoughtfittedthought;opinionmetopinion:wecoincided，inshort，perfectly。
Ifinourtriotherewasasuperiorandaleader，itwasDiana。Physically，shefarexcelledme:shewashandsome;shewasvigorous。Inheranimalspiritstherewasanaffluenceoflifeandcertaintyofflow，suchasexcitedmywonder，whileitbaffledmycomprehension。Icouldtalkawhilewhentheeveningcommenced，butthefirstgushofvivacityandfluencygone，IwasfaintositonastoolatDiana’sfeet，torestmyheadonherknee，andlistenalternatelytoherandMary，whiletheysoundedthoroughlythetopiconwhichIhadbuttouched。DianaofferedtoteachmeGerman。Ilikedtolearnofher:Isawthepartofinstructresspleasedandsuitedher;thatofscholarpleasedandsuitedmenoless。Ournaturesdovetailed:mutualaffection—ofthestrongestkind—wastheresult。TheydiscoveredIcoulddraw:theirpencilsandcolour—boxeswereimmediatelyatmyservice。Myskill，greaterinthisonepointthantheirs，surprisedandcharmedthem。Marywouldsitandwatchmebythehourtogether:thenshewouldtakelessons;andadocile，intelligent，assiduouspupilshemade。Thusoccupied，andmutuallyentertained，dayspassedlikehours，andweekslikedays。
AstoMr。StJohn，theintimacywhichhadarisensonaturallyandrapidlybetweenmeandhissistersdidnotextendtohim。Onereasonofthedistanceyetobservedbetweenuswas，thathewascomparativelyseldomathome:alargeproportionofhistimeappeareddevotedtovisitingthesickandpooramongthescatteredpopulationofhisparish。
Noweatherseemedtohinderhiminthesepastoralexcursions:rainorfair，hewould，whenhishoursofmorningstudywereover，takehishat，and，followedbyhisfather’soldpointer，Carlo，gooutonhismissionofloveorduty—Iscarcelyknowinwhichlightheregardedit。Sometimes，whenthedaywasveryunfavourable，hissisterswouldexpostulate。Hewouldthensay，withapeculiarsmile，moresolemnthancheerful—
“AndifIletagustofwindorasprinklingofrainturnmeasidefromtheseeasytasks，whatpreparationwouldsuchslothbeforthefutureIproposetomyself？”
DianaandMary’sgeneralanswertothisquestionwasasigh，andsomeminutesofapparentlymournfulmeditation。
Butbesideshisfrequentabsences，therewasanotherbarriertofriendshipwithhim:heseemedofareserved，anabstracted，andevenofabroodingnature。Zealousinhisministeriallabours，blamelessinhislifeandhabits，heyetdidnotappeartoenjoythatmentalserenity，thatinwardcontent，whichshouldbetherewardofeverysincereChristianandpracticalphilanthropist。Often，ofanevening，whenhesatatthewindow，hisdeskandpapersbeforehim，hewouldceasereadingorwriting，resthischinonhishand，anddeliverhimselfuptoIknownotwhatcourseofthought;butthatitwasperturbedandexcitingmightbeseeninthefrequentflashandchangefuldilationofhiseye。
Ithink，moreover，thatNaturewasnottohimthattreasuryofdelightitwastohissisters。Heexpressedonce，andbutonceinmyhearing，astrongsenseoftheruggedcharmofthehills，andaninbornaffectionforthedarkroofandhoarywallshecalledhishome;buttherewasmoreofgloomthanpleasureinthetoneandwordsinwhichthesentimentwasmanifested;andneverdidheseemtoroamthemoorsforthesakeoftheirsoothingsilence—neverseekoutordwelluponthethousandpeacefuldelightstheycouldyield。
Incommunicativeashewas，sometimeelapsedbeforeIhadanopportunityofgauginghismind。IfirstgotanideaofitscalibrewhenIheardhimpreachinhisownchurchatMorton。IwishIcoulddescribethatsermon:butitispastmypower。Icannotevenrenderfaithfullytheeffectitproducedonme。
Itbegancalm—andindeed，asfarasdeliveryandpitchofvoicewent，itwascalmtotheend:anearnestlyfelt，yetstrictlyrestrainedzealbreathedsooninthedistinctaccents，andpromptedthenervouslanguage。Thisgrewtoforce—compressed，condensed，controlled。Theheartwasthrilled，themindastonished，bythepowerofthepreacher:neitherweresoftened。Throughouttherewasastrangebitterness;anabsenceofconsolatorygentleness;sternallusionstoCalvinisticdoctrines—election，predestination，reprobation—werefrequent;andeachreferencetothesepointssoundedlikeasentencepronouncedfordoom。Whenhehaddone，insteadoffeelingbetter，calmer，moreenlightenedbyhisdiscourse，Iexperiencedaninexpressiblesadness;foritseemedtome—Iknownotwhetherequallysotoothers—thattheeloquencetowhichIhadbeenlisteninghadsprungfromadepthwherelayturbiddregsofdisappointment—wheremovedtroublingimpulsesofinsatiateyearningsanddisquietingaspirations。IwassureSt。JohnRivers—pure—lived，conscientious，zealousashewas—hadnotyetfoundthatpeaceofGodwhichpassethallunderstanding:hehadnomorefoundit，Ithought，thanhadIwithmyconcealedandrackingregretsformybrokenidolandlostelysium—regretstowhichIhavelatterlyavoidedreferring，butwhichpossessedmeandtyrannisedovermeruthlessly。
Meantimeamonthwasgone。DianaandMaryweresoontoleaveMoorHouse，andreturntothefardifferentlifeandscenewhichawaitedthem，asgovernessesinalarge，fashionable，south—of—Englandcity，whereeachheldasituationinfamiliesbywhosewealthyandhaughtymemberstheywereregardedonlyashumbledependants，andwhoneitherknewnorsoughtouttheirinnateexcellences，andappreciatedonlytheiracquiredaccomplishmentsastheyappreciatedtheskilloftheircookorthetasteoftheirwaiting—woman。Mr。St。Johnhadsaidnothingtomeyetabouttheemploymenthehadpromisedtoobtainforme;yetitbecameurgentthatIshouldhaveavocationofsomekind。Onemorning，beingleftalonewithhimafewminutesintheparlour，Iventuredtoapproachthewindow—recess—whichhistable，chair，anddeskconsecratedasakindofstudy—andIwasgoingtospeak，thoughnotverywellknowinginwhatwordstoframemyinquiry—foritisatalltimesdifficulttobreaktheiceofreserveglassingoversuchnaturesashis—whenhesavedmethetroublebybeingthefirsttocommenceadialogue。
LookingupasIdrewnear—“Youhaveaquestiontoaskofme？”hesaid。
“Yes;IwishtoknowwhetheryouhaveheardofanyserviceIcanoffermyselftoundertake？”
“Ifoundordevisedsomethingforyouthreeweeksago;butasyouseemedbothusefulandhappyhere—asmysistershadevidentlybecomeattachedtoyou，andyoursocietygavethemunusualpleasure—IdeemeditinexpedienttobreakinonyourmutualcomforttilltheirapproachingdeparturefromMarshEndshouldrenderyoursnecessary。”
“Andtheywillgointhreedaysnow？”Isaid。
“Yes;andwhentheygo，IshallreturntotheparsonageatMorton:Hannahwillaccompanyme;andthisoldhousewillbeshutup。”
Iwaitedafewmoments，expectinghewouldgoonwiththesubjectfirstbroached:butheseemedtohaveenteredanothertrainofreflection:hislookdenotedabstractionfrommeandmybusiness。Iwasobligedtorecallhimtoathemewhichwasofnecessityoneofcloseandanxiousinteresttome。
“Whatistheemploymentyouhadinview，Mr。Rivers？Ihopethisdelaywillnothaveincreasedthedifficultyofsecuringit。”
“Oh，no;sinceitisinemploymentwhichdependsonlyonmetogive，andyoutoaccept。”
Heagainpaused:thereseemedareluctancetocontinue。Igrewimpatient:arestlessmovementortwo，andaneagerandexactingglancefastenedonhisface，conveyedthefeelingtohimaseffectuallyaswordscouldhavedone，andwithlesstrouble。
“Youneedbeinnohurrytohear，”hesaid:“letmefranklytellyou，Ihavenothingeligibleorprofitabletosuggest。BeforeIexplain，recall，ifyouplease，mynotice，clearlygiven，thatifIhelpedyou，itmustbeastheblindmanwouldhelpthelame。Iampoor;forIfindthat，whenIhavepaidmyfather’sdebts，allthepatrimonyremainingtomewillbethiscrumblinggrange，therowofscathedfirsbehind，andthepatchofmoorishsoil，withtheyew—treesandholly—bushesinfront。Iamobscure:Riversisanoldname;butofthethreesoledescendantsoftherace，twoearnthedependant’scrustamongstrangers，andthethirdconsidershimselfanalienfromhisnativecountry—notonlyforlife，butindeath。Yes，anddeems，andisboundtodeem，himselfhonouredbythelot，andaspiresbutafterthedaywhenthecrossofseparationfromfleshlytiesshallbelaidonhisshoulders，andwhentheHeadofthatchurch—militantofwhosehumblestmembersheisone，shallgivetheword，‘Rise，followMe！’”
St。Johnsaidthesewordsashepronouncedhissermons，withaquiet，deepvoice;withanunflushedcheek，andacoruscatingradianceofglance。Heresumed—
“AndsinceIammyselfpoorandobscure，Icanofferyoubutaserviceofpovertyandobscurity。Youmayeventhinkitdegrading—forIseenowyourhabitshavebeenwhattheworldcallsrefined:yourtastesleantotheideal，andyoursocietyhasatleastbeenamongsttheeducated;butIconsiderthatnoservicedegradeswhichcanbetterourrace。IholdthatthemorearidandunreclaimedthesoilwheretheChristianlabourer’staskoftillageisappointedhim—thescantierthemeedhistoilbrings—thehigherthehonour。His，undersuchcircumstances，isthedestinyofthepioneer;andthefirstpioneersoftheGospelweretheApostles—theircaptainwasJesus，theRedeemer，Himself。”
“Well？”Isaid，asheagainpaused—“proceed。”
Helookedatmebeforeheproceeded:indeed，heseemedleisurelytoreadmyface，asifitsfeaturesandlineswerecharactersonapage。Theconclusionsdrawnfromthisscrutinyhepartiallyexpressedinhissucceedingobservations。
“IbelieveyouwillacceptthepostIofferyou，”saidhe，“andholditforawhile:notpermanently，though:anymorethanIcouldpermanentlykeepthenarrowandnarrowing—thetranquil，hiddenofficeofEnglishcountryincumbent;forinyournatureisanalloyasdetrimentaltoreposeasthatinmine，thoughofadifferentkind。”
“Doexplain，”Iurged，whenhehaltedoncemore。
“Iwill;andyoushallhearhowpoortheproposalis，—howtrivial—howcramping。IshallnotstaylongatMorton，nowthatmyfatherisdead，andthatIammyownmaster。Ishallleavetheplaceprobablyinthecourseofatwelve—month;butwhileIdostay，Iwillexertmyselftotheutmostforitsimprovement。Morton，whenIcametoittwoyearsago，hadnoschool:thechildrenofthepoorwereexcludedfromeveryhopeofprogress。Iestablishedoneforboys:Imeannowtoopenasecondschoolforgirls。Ihavehiredabuildingforthepurpose，withacottageoftworoomsattachedtoitforthemistress’shouse。Hersalarywillbethirtypoundsayear:herhouseisalreadyfurnished，verysimply，butsufficiently，bythekindnessofalady，MissOliver;theonlydaughterofthesolerichmaninmyparish—Mr。Oliver，theproprietorofaneedle—factoryandiron—foundryinthevalley。Thesameladypaysfortheeducationandclothingofanorphanfromtheworkhouse，onconditionthatsheshallaidthemistressinsuchmenialofficesconnectedwithherownhouseandtheschoolasheroccupationofteachingwillpreventherhavingtimetodischargeinperson。Willyoubethismistress？”
Heputthequestionratherhurriedly;heseemedhalftoexpectanindignant，oratleastadisdainfulrejectionoftheoffer:notknowingallmythoughtsandfeelings，thoughguessingsome，hecouldnottellinwhatlightthelotwouldappeartome。Intruthitwashumble—butthenitwassheltered，andIwantedasafeasylum:itwasplodding—butthen，comparedwiththatofagovernessinarichhouse，itwasindependent;andthefearofservitudewithstrangersenteredmysoullikeiron:itwasnotignoble—notunworthy—notmentallydegrading，Imademydecision。
“Ithankyoufortheproposal，Mr。Rivers，andIacceptitwithallmyheart。”
“Butyoucomprehendme？”hesaid。“Itisavillageschool:yourscholarswillbeonlypoorgirls—cottagers’children—atthebest，farmers’daughters。Knitting，sewing，reading，writing，ciphering，willbeallyouwillhavetoteach。Whatwillyoudowithyouraccomplishments？What，withthelargestportionofyourmind—sentiments—tastes？”
“Savethemtilltheyarewanted。Theywillkeep。”
“Youknowwhatyouundertake，then？”
“Ido。”
Henowsmiled:andnotabitterorasadsmile，butonewellpleasedanddeeplygratified。
“Andwhenwillyoucommencetheexerciseofyourfunction？”
“Iwillgotomyhouseto—morrow，andopentheschool，ifyoulike，nextweek。”
“Verywell:sobeit。”
Heroseandwalkedthroughtheroom。Standingstill，heagainlookedatme。Heshookhishead。
“Whatdoyoudisapproveof，Mr。Rivers？”Iasked。
“YouwillnotstayatMortonlong:no，no！”
“Why？Whatisyourreasonforsayingso？”
“Ireaditinyoureye;itisnotofthatdescriptionwhichpromisesthemaintenanceofaneventenorinlife。”
“Iamnotambitious。”
Hestartedattheword“ambitious。”Herepeated，“No。Whatmadeyouthinkofambition？Whoisambitious？IknowIam:buthowdidyoufinditout？”
“Iwasspeakingofmyself。”
“Well，ifyouarenotambitious，youare—”Hepaused。
“What？”
“Iwasgoingtosay，impassioned:butperhapsyouwouldhavemisunderstoodtheword，andbeendispleased。Imean，thathumanaffectionsandsympathieshaveamostpowerfulholdonyou。Iamsureyoucannotlongbecontenttopassyourleisureinsolitude，andtodevoteyourworkinghourstoamonotonouslabourwhollyvoidofstimulus:anymorethanIcanbecontent，”headded，withemphasis，“tolivehereburiedinmorass，pentinwithmountains—mynature，thatGodgaveme，contravened;myfaculties，heaven—bestowed，paralysed—madeuseless。YouhearnowhowIcontradictmyself。I，whopreachedcontentmentwithahumblelot，andjustifiedthevocationevenofhewersofwoodanddrawersofwaterinGod’sservice—I，Hisordainedminister，almostraveinmyrestlessness。Well，propensitiesandprinciplesmustbereconciledbysomemeans。”
Helefttheroom。InthisbriefhourIhadlearntmoreofhimthaninthewholepreviousmonth:yetstillhepuzzledme。
DianaandMaryRiversbecamemoresadandsilentasthedayapproachedforleavingtheirbrotherandtheirhome。Theybothtriedtoappearasusual;batthesorrowtheyhadtostruggleagainstwasonethatcouldnotbeentirelyconqueredorconcealed。Dianaintimatedthatthiswouldbeadifferentpartingfromanytheyhadeveryetknown。Itwouldprobably，asfarasSt。Johnwasconcerned，beapartingforyears:itmightbeapartingforlife。