Itisaninsolencetowardthemajorityofthepurchasers,foritisaveryfrankandimpudentwayofsaying,\'Getthetranslationsmadeyourselfifyouwantthem,thisbookisnotwrittenfortheignorantclasses。\'TherearemenwhoknowaforeignlanguagesowellandhaveuseditsolongintheirdailylifethattheyseemtodischargewholevolleysofitintotheirEnglishwritingsunconsciously,andsotheyomittotranslate,asmuchashalfthetime。
Thatisagreatcrueltytonineoutoftenoftheman\'sreaders。Whatistheexcuseforthis?ThewriterwouldsayheonlyusestheforeignlanguagewherethedelicacyofhispointcannotbeconveyedinEnglish。
Verywell,thenhewriteshisbestthingsforthetenthman,andheoughttowarnthenineothernottobuyhisbook。
However,theexcuseheoffersisatleastanexcuse;
butthereisanothersetofmenwhoarelikeYOU;
theyknowaWORDhereandthere,ofaforeignlanguage,orafewbeggarlylittlethree-wordphrases,filchedfromthebackoftheDictionary,andthesearecontinuallypepperingintotheirliterature,withapretenseofknowingthatlanguage——whatexcusecantheyoffer?Theforeignwordsandphraseswhichtheyusehavetheirexactequivalentsinanoblerlanguage——English;yettheythinkthey\'adorntheirpage\'whentheysaySTRASSEforstreet,andBAHNHOFforrailway-station,andsoon——flauntingtheseflutteringragsofpovertyinthereader\'sfaceandimagininghewillbeassenoughtotakethemforthesignofuntoldrichesheldinreserve。Iwillletyour\'learning\'remaininyourreport;youhaveasmuchright,Isuppose,to\'adornyourpage\'withZuluandChineseandChoctawrubbishasothersofyoursorthavetoadorntheirswithinsolentoddsandendssmouchedfromhalfadozenlearnedtongueswhoseA-BABStheydon\'tevenknow。\"
Whenthemusingspiderstepsuponthered-hotshovel,hefirstexhibitsawildsurprise,thenheshrivelsup。
SimilarwastheeffectoftheseblisteringwordsuponthetranquilandunsuspectingAgent。Icanbedreadfullyroughonapersonwhenthemoodtakesme。
CHAPTERXXXI
[Alp-scalingbyCarriage]
Wenowpreparedforaconsiderablewalk——fromLucernetoInterlaken,overtheBru\"nigPass。ButatthelastmomenttheweatherwassogoodthatIchangedmymindandhiredafour-horsecarriage。Itwasahugevehicle,roomy,aseasyinitsmotionasapalanquin,andexceedinglycomfortable。
Wegotawayprettyearlyinthemorning,afterahotbreakfast,andwentbowlingoverahard,smoothroad,throughthesummerlovelinessofSwitzerland,withnearanddistantlakesandmountainsbeforeandaboutusfortheentertainmentoftheeye,andthemusicofmultitudinousbirdstocharmtheear。Sometimestherewasonlythewidthoftheroadbetweentheimposingprecipicesontherightandtheclearcoolwaterontheleftwithitsshoalsofuncatchablefishskimmingaboutthroughthebarsofsunandshadow;
andsometimes,inplaceoftheprecipices,thegrassylandstretchedaway,inanapparentlyendlessupwardslant,andwasdottedeverywherewithsnuglittlechalets,thepeculiarlycaptivatingcottageofSwitzerland。
Theordinarychaletturnsabroad,honestgableendtotheroad,anditsampleroofhoversoverthehomeinaprotecting,caressingway,projectingitsshelteringeavesfaroutward。Thequaintwindowsarefilledwithlittlepanes,andgarnishedwithwhitemuslincurtains,andbrightenedwithboxesofbloomingflowers。
Acrossthefrontofthehouse,andupthespreadingeavesandalongthefancifulrailingsoftheshallowporch,areelaboratecarvings——wreaths,fruits,arabesques,versesfromScripture,names,dates,etc。Thebuildingiswhollyofwood,reddishbrownintint,averypleasingcolor。Itgenerallyhasvinesclimbingoverit。
Setsuchahouseagainstthefreshgreenofthehillside,anditlookseversocozyandinvitingandpicturesque,andisadecidedlygracefuladditiontothelandscape。
Onedoesnotfindoutwhataholdthechalethastakenuponhim,untilhepresentlycomesuponanewhouse——
ahousewhichisapingthetownfashionsofGermanyandFrance,aprim,hideous,straight-up-and-downthing,plasteredalloverontheoutsidetolooklikestone,andaltogethersostiff,andformal,andugly,andforbidding,andsooutoftunewiththegraciouslandscape,andsodeafanddumbanddeadtothepoetryofitssurroundings,thatitsuggestsanundertakeratapicnic,acorpseatawedding,apuritaninParadise。
InthecourseofthemorningwepassedthespotwherePontiusPilateissaidtohavethrownhimselfintothelake。
ThelegendgoesthataftertheCrucifixionhisconsciencetroubledhim,andhefledfromJerusalemandwanderedabouttheearth,wearyoflifeandapreytotorturesofthemind。Eventually,hehidhimselfaway,ontheheightsofMountPilatus,anddweltaloneamongthecloudsandcragsforyears;butrestandpeacewerestilldeniedhim,sohefinallyputanendtohismiserybydrowninghimself。
Presentlywepassedtheplacewhereamanofbetterodorwasborn。Thiswasthechildren\'sfriend,SantaClaus,orSt。Nicholas。Therearesomeunaccountablereputationsintheworld。Thissaint\'sisaninstance。Hehasrankedforagesasthepeculiarfriendofchildren,yetitappearshewasnotmuchofafriendtohisown。
Hehadtenofthem,andwhenfiftyyearsoldheleftthem,andsoughtoutasdismalarefugefromtheworldaspossible,andbecameahermitinorderthathemightreflectuponpiousthemeswithoutbeingdisturbedbythejoyousandothernoisesfromthenursery,doubtless。
JudgingbyPilateandSt。Nicholas,thereexistsnorulefortheconstructionofhermits;theyseemmadeoutofallkindsofmaterial。ButPilateattendedtothematterofexpiatinghissinwhilehewasalive,whereasSt。Nicholaswillprobablyhavetogoonclimbingdownsootychimneys,Christmaseve,forever,andconferringkindnessonotherpeople\'schildren,tomakeupfordesertinghisown。
HisbonesarekeptinachurchinavillageSachseln
whichwevisited,andarenaturallyheldingreatreverence。
Hisportraitiscommoninthefarmhousesoftheregion,butisbelievedbymanytobebutanindifferentlikeness。
Duringhishermitlife,accordingtolegend,hepartookofthebreadandwineofthecommuniononceamonth,butalltherestofthemonthhefasted。
Aconstantmarvelwithus,aswespedalongthebasesofthesteepmountainsonthisjourney,was,notthatavalanchesoccur,butthattheyarenotoccurringallthetime。Onedoesnotunderstandwhyrocksandlandslidesdonotplungedownthesedeclivitiesdaily。Alandslipoccurredthreequartersofacenturyago,ontheroutefromArthtoBrunnen,whichwasaformidablething。
Amassofconglomeratetwomileslong,athousandfeetbroad,andahundredfeetthick,brokeawayfromacliffthreethousandfeethighandhurleditselfintothevalleybelow,buryingfourvillagesandfivehundredpeople,asinagrave。
Wehadsuchabeautifulday,andsuchendlesspicturesoflimpidlakes,andgreenhillsandvalleys,andmajesticmountains,andmilkycataractsdancingdownthesteepsandgleaminginthesun,thatwecouldnothelpfeelingsweettowardalltheworld;sowetriedtodrinkallthemilk,andeatallthegrapesandapricotsandberries,andbuyallthebouquetsofwildflowerswhichthelittlepeasantboysandgirlsofferedforsale;
butwehadtoretirefromthiscontract,foritwastooheavy。
Atshortdistances——andtheywereentirelytooshort——allalongtheroad,weregroupsofneatandcomelychildren,withtheirwaresnicelyandtemptinglysetforthinthegrassundertheshadetrees,andassoonasweapproachedtheyswarmedintotheroad,holdingouttheirbasketsandmilkbottles,andranbesidethecarriage,barefootandbareheaded,andimportunedustobuy。
Theyseldomdesistedearly,butcontinuedtorunandinsist——besidethewagonwhiletheycould,andbehindituntiltheylostbreath。Thentheyturnedandchasedareturningcarriagebacktotheirtrading-postagain。
Afterseveralhoursofthis,withoutanyintermission,itbecomesalmostannoying。Idonotknowwhatweshouldhavedonewithoutthereturningcarriagestodrawoffthepursuit。However,therewereplentyofthese,loadedwithdustytouristsandpiledhighwithluggage。
Indeed,fromLucernetoInterlakenwehadthespectacle,amongotherscenery,ofanunbrokenprocessionoffruit-peddlersandtouristscarriages。
Ourtalkwasmostlyanticipatoryofwhatweshouldseeonthedown-gradeoftheBru\"nig,byandby,afterweshouldpassthesummit。AllourfriendsinLucernehadsaidthattolookdownuponMeiringen,andtherushingblue-grayriverAar,andthebroadlevelgreenvalley;
andacrossatthemightyAlpineprecipicesthatrisestraightuptothecloudsoutofthatvalley;andupatthemicroscopicchaletspercheduponthedizzyeavesofthoseprecipicesandwinkingdimlyandfitfullythroughthedriftingveilofvapor;andstillupandup,atthesuperbOltschibackandtheotherbeautifulcascadesthatleapfromthoseruggedheights,robedinpowderyspray,ruffledwithfoam,andgirdledwithrainbows——tolookuponthesethings,theysay,wastolookuponthelastpossibilityofthesublimeandtheenchanting。Therefore,asIsay,wetalkedmainlyofthesecomingwonders;ifwewereconsciousofanyimpatience,itwastogetthereinfavorableseason;
ifwefeltanyanxiety,itwasthatthedaymightremainperfect,andenableustoseethosemarvelsattheirbest。
AsweapproachedtheKaiserstuhl,apartoftheharnessgaveway。
Wewereindistressforamoment,butonlyamoment。
Itwasthefore-and-aftgearthatwasbroken——thethingthatleadsaftfromtheforwardpartofthehorseandismadefasttothethingthatpullsthewagon。InAmericathiswouldhavebeenaheavyleathernstrap;but,alloverthecontinentitisnothingbutapieceofropethesizeofyourlittlefinger——clothes-lineiswhatitis。
Cabsuseit,privatecarriages,freight-cartsandwagons,allsortsofvehicleshaveit。InMunichIafterwardsawitusedonalongwagonladenwithfifty-fourhalf-barrelsofbeer;IhadbeforenoticedthatthecabsinHeidelbergusedit——notnewrope,butropethathadbeeninusesinceAbraham\'stime——andIhadfeltnervous,sometimes,behinditwhenthecabwastearingdownahill。ButI
hadlongbeenaccustomedtoitnow,andhadevenbecomeafraidoftheleatherstrapwhichbelongedinitsplace。
Ourdrivergotafreshpieceofclothes-lineoutofhislockerandrepairedthebreakintwominutes。
SomuchforoneEuropeanfashion。Everycountryhasitsownways。Itmayinterestthereadertoknowhowthey\"puthorsesto\"onthecontinent。Themanstandsupthehorsesoneachsideofthethingthatprojectsfromthefrontendofthewagon,andthenthrowsthetangledmessofgearforwardthrougharing,andhaulsitaft,andpassestheotherthingthroughtheotherringandhaulsitaftontheothersideoftheotherhorse,oppositetothefirstone,aftercrossingthemandbringingthelooseendback,andthenbucklestheotherthingunderneaththehorse,andtakesanotherthingandwrapsitaroundthethingIspokeofbefore,andputsanotherthingovereachhorse\'shead,withbroadflapperstoittokeepthedustoutofhiseyes,andputstheironthinginhismouthforhimtogrithisteethon,uphill,andbringstheendsofthesethingsaftoverhisback,afterbucklinganotheronearoundunderhisnecktoholdhisheadup,andhitchinganotherthingonathingthatgoesoverhisshoulderstokeephisheadupwhenheisclimbingahill,andthentakestheslackofthethingwhichImentionedawhileago,andfetchesitaftandmakesitfasttothethingthatpullsthewagon,andhandstheotherthingsuptothedrivertosteerwith。
Ineverhavebuckledupahorsemyself,butIdonotthinkwedoitthatway。
Wehadfourveryhandsomehorses,andthedriverwasveryproudofhisturnout。Hewouldbowlalongonareasonabletrot,onthehighway,butwhenheenteredavillagehediditonafuriousrun,andaccompanieditwithafrenzyofceaselesswhip-crackingsthatsoundedlikevolleysofmusketry。
Hetorethroughthenarrowstreetsandaroundthesharpcurveslikeamovingearthquake,showeringhisvolleysashewent,andbeforehimsweptacontinuoustidalwaveofscamperingchildren,ducks,cats,andmothersclaspingbabieswhichtheyhadsnatchedoutofthewayofthecomingdestruction;andasthislivingwavewashedaside,alongthewalls,itselements,beingsafe,forgottheirfearsandturnedtheiradmiringgazeuponthatgallantdrivertillhethunderedaroundthenextcurveandwaslosttosight。
Hewasagreatmantothosevillagers,withhisgaudyclothesandhisterrificways。Wheneverhestoppedtohavehiscattlewateredandfedwithloavesofbread,thevillagersstoodaroundadmiringhimwhileheswaggeredabout,thelittleboysgazedupathisfacewithhumblehomage,andthelandlordbroughtoutfoamingmugsofbeerandconversedproudlywithhimwhilehedrank。
Thenhemountedhisloftybox,swunghisexplosivewhip,andawayhewentagain,likeastorm。IhadnotseenanythinglikethisbeforesinceIwasaboy,andthestageusedtoflourishthevillagewiththedustflyingandthehorntooting。
WhenwereachedthebaseoftheKaiserstuhl,wetooktwomorehorses;wehadtotoilalongwithdifficultyforanhourandahalfortwohours,fortheascentwasnotverygradual,butwhenwepassedthebackboneandapproachedthestation,thedriversurpassedallhispreviouseffortsinthewayofrushandclatter。
Hecouldnothavesixhorsesallthetime,sohemadethemostofhischancewhilehehadit。
UptothispointwehadbeenintheheartoftheWilliamTellregion。Theheroisnotforgotten,byanymeans,orheldindoubtfulveneration。Hiswoodenimage,withhisbowdrawn,abovethedoorsoftaverns,wasafrequentfeatureofthescenery。
AboutnoonwearrivedatthefootoftheBru\"nigPass,andmadeatwo-hourstopatthevillagehotel,anotherofthoseclean,pretty,andthoroughlywell-keptinnswhicharesuchanastonishmenttopeoplewhoareaccustomedtohotelsofadismallydifferentpatterninremotecountry-towns。
Therewasalakehere,inthelapofthegreatmountains,thegreenslopesthatrosetowardthelowercragsweregracedwithscatteredSwisscottagesnestlingamongminiaturefarmsandgardens,andfromoutaleafyambuscadeintheupperheightstumbledabrawlingcataract。
Carriageaftercarriage,ladenwithtouristsandtrunks,arrived,andthequiethotelwassoonpopulous。
Wewereearlyatthetabled\'ho^teandsawthepeopleallcomein。Thereweretwenty-five,perhaps。Theywereofvariousnationalities,butweweretheonlyAmericans。
NexttomesatanEnglishbride,andnexttohersathernewhusband,whomshecalled\"Neddy,\"thoughhewasbigenoughandstalwartenoughtobeentitledtohisfullname。
Theyhadaprettylittlelovers\'quarreloverwhatwinetheyshouldhave。Neddywasforobeyingtheguide-bookandtakingthewineofthecountry;butthebridesaid:
\"What,thatnahstystuff!\"
\"Itisn\'tnahsty,pet,it\'squitegood。\"
\"ItISnahsty。\"
\"No,itISN\'Tnahsty。\"
\"It\'sOfulnahsty,Neddy,andIshahn\'tdrinkit。\"
Thenthequestionwas,whatshemusthave。Shesaidheknewverywellthatsheneverdrankanythingbutchampagne。
Sheadded:
\"Youknowverywellpapaalwayshaschampagneonhistable,andI\'vealwaysbeenusedtoit。\"
Neddymadeaplayfulpretenseofbeingdistressedabouttheexpense,andthisamusedhersomuchthatshenearlyexhaustedherselfwithlaughter——andthispleasedHIM
somuchthatherepeatedhisjestacoupleoftimes,andaddednewandkillingvarietiestoit。Whenthebridefinallyrecovered,shegaveNeddyalove-boxonthearmwithherfan,andsaidwitharchseverity:
\"Well,youwouldHAVEme——nothingelsewoulddo——
soyou\'llhavetomakethebestofabadbargain。
DOorderthechampagne,I\'mOfuldry。\"
Sowithamockgroanwhichmadeherlaughagain,Neddyorderedthechampagne。
Thefactthatthisyoungwomanhadnevermoistenedtheselvedgeedgeofhersoulwithalessplebeiantipplethanchampagne,hadamarkedandsubduingeffectonHarris。Hebelievedshebelongedtotheroyalfamily。
ButIhadmydoubts。
Weheardtwoorthreedifferentlanguagesspokenbypeopleatthetableandguessedoutthenationalitiesofmostofthegueststooursatisfaction,butwefailedwithanelderlygentlemanandhiswifeandayounggirlwhosatoppositeus,andwithagentlemanofaboutthirty-fivewhosatthreeseatsbeyondHarris。
Wedidnothearanyofthesespeak。Butfinallythelast-namedgentlemanleftwhilewewerenotnoticing,butwelookedupashereachedthefarendofthetable。
Hestoppedthereamoment,andmadehistoiletwithapocketcomb。SohewasaGerman;orelsehehadlivedinGermanhotelslongenoughtocatchthefashion。
Whentheelderlycoupleandtheyounggirlrosetoleave,theybowedrespectfullytous。SotheywereGermans,too。
Thisnationalcustomisworthsixoftheotherone,forexport。
AfterdinnerwetalkedwithseveralEnglishmen,andtheyinflamedourdesiretoahotterdegreethanever,toseethesightsofMeiringenfromtheheightsoftheBru\"nigPass。Theysaidtheviewwasmarvelous,andthatonewhohadseenitoncecouldneverforgetit。
Theyalsospokeoftheromanticnatureoftheroadoverthepass,andhowinoneplaceithadbeencutthroughaflankofthesolidrock,insuchawaythatthemountainoverhungthetouristashepassedby;andtheyfurthermoresaidthatthesharpturnsintheroadandtheabruptnessofthedescentwouldaffordusathrillingexperience,forweshouldgodowninaflyinggallopandseemtobespinningaroundtheringsofawhirlwind,likeadropofwhiskeydescendingthespiralsofacorkscrew。
Igotalltheinformationoutofthesegentlementhatwecouldneed;andthen,tomakeeverythingcomplete,Iaskedthemifabodycouldgetholdofalittlefruitandmilkhereandthere,incaseofnecessity。Theythrewuptheirhandsinspeechlessintimationthattheroadwassimplypavedwithrefreshment-peddlers。Wewereimpatienttogetaway,now,andtherestofourtwo-hourstopratherdragged。
Butfinallythesettimearrivedandwebegantheascent。
Indeeditwasawonderfulroad。Itwassmooth,andcompact,andclean,andthesidenexttheprecipiceswasguardedallalongbydressedstonepostsaboutthreefeethigh,placedatshortdistancesapart。TheroadcouldnothavebeenbetterbuiltifNapoleontheFirsthadbuiltit。
HeseemstohavebeentheintroducerofthesortofroadswhichEuropenowuses。AllliteraturewhichdescribeslifeasitexistedinEngland,France,andGermanyuptothecloseofthelastcentury,isfilledwithpicturesofcoachesandcarriageswallowingthroughthesethreecountriesinmudandslushhalf-wheeldeep;butafterNapoleonhadflounderedthroughaconqueredkingdomhegenerallyarrangedthingssothattherestoftheworldcouldfollowdry-shod。
Wewentonclimbing,higherandhigher,andcurvinghitherandthither,intheshadeofnoblewoods,andwitharichvarietyandprofusionofwildflowersallaboutus;
andglimpsesofroundedgrassybackbonesbelowusoccupiedbytrimchaletsandnibblingsheep,andotherglimpsesoffarloweraltitudes,wheredistancediminishedthechaletstotoysandobliteratedthesheepaltogether;
andeverynowandthensomeerminedmonarchoftheAlpsswungmagnificentlyintoviewforamoment,thendriftedpastaninterveningspuranddisappearedagain。
Itwasanintoxicatingtripaltogether;theexceedingsenseofsatisfactionthatfollowsagooddinneraddedlargelytotheenjoyment;thehavingsomethingespecialtolookforwardtoandmuseabout,liketheapproachinggrandeursofMeiringen,sharpenedthezest。Smokingwasneversogoodbefore,solidcomfortwasneversolider;
welaybackagainstthethickcushionssilent,meditative,steepedinfelicity。
Irubbedmyeyes,openedthem,andstarted。IhadbeendreamingIwasatsea,anditwasathrillingsurprisetowakeupandfindlandallaroundme。Ittookmeacouplesecondsto\"cometo,\"asyoumaysay;thenItookinthesituation。
Thehorsesweredrinkingatatroughintheedgeofatown,thedriverwastakingbeer,Harriswassnoringatmyside,thecourier,withfoldedarmsandbowedhead,wassleepingonthebox,twodozenbarefootedandbareheadedchildrenweregatheredaboutthecarriage,withtheirhandscrossedbehind,gazingupwithseriousandinnocentadmirationatthedozingtouristsbakingthereinthesun。
Severalsmallgirlsheldnight-cappedbabiesnearlyasbigasthemselvesintheirarms,andeventhesefatbabiesseemedtotakeasortofsluggishinterestinus。
Wehadsleptanhourandahalfandmissedallthescenery!
Ididnotneedanybodytotellmethat。IfIhadbeenagirl,Icouldhavecursedforvexation。Asitwas,Iwokeuptheagentandgavehimapieceofmymind。
Insteadofbeinghumiliated,heonlyupbraidedmeforbeingsowantinginvigilance。HesaidhehadexpectedtoimprovehismindbycomingtoEurope,butamanmighttraveltotheendsoftheearthwithmeandneverseeanything,forI
wasmanifestlyendowedwiththeverygeniusofillluck。
Heeventriedtogetupsomeemotionaboutthatpoorcourier,whonevergotachancetoseeanything,onaccountofmyheedlessness。ButwhenIthoughtIhadborneaboutenoughofthiskindoftalk,IthreatenedtomakeHarristrampbacktothesummitandmakeareportonthatscenery,andthissuggestionspikedhisbattery。
WedrovesullenlythroughBrienz,deadtotheseductionsofitsbewilderingarrayofSwisscarvingsandtheclamorousHOO-hooingofitscuckooclocks,andhadnotentirelyrecoveredourspiritswhenwerattledacrossabridgeovertherushingblueriverandenteredtheprettytownofInterlaken。Itwasjustaboutsunset,andwehadmadethetripfromLucerneintenhours。
CHAPTERXXXII
[TheJungfrau,theBride,andthePiano]
WelocatedourselvesattheJungfrauHotel,oneofthosehugeestablishmentswhichtheneedsofmoderntravelhavecreatedineveryattractivespotonthecontinent。
Therewasagreatgatheringatdinner,and,asusual,oneheardallsortsoflanguages。
Thetabled\'ho^tewasservedbywaitressesdressedinthequaintandcomelycostumeoftheSwisspeasants。
Thisconsistsofasimplegrosdelaine,trimmedwithashesofroses,withoverskirtofscarebleuventresaintgris,cutbiasontheoff-side,withfacingsofpetitpolonaiseandnarrowinsertionsofpa^tedefoiegrasbackstitchedtothemiseensce`neintheformofajeud\'esprit。Itgivestothewearerasingularlypiquantandalluringaspect。
Oneofthesewaitresses,awomanofforty,hadside-whiskersreachinghalf-waydownherjaws。
Theyweretwofingersbroad,darkincolor,prettythick,andthehairswereaninchlong。Oneseesmanywomenonthecontinentwithquiteconspicuousmustaches,butthiswastheonlywomanIsawwhohadreachedthedignityofwhiskers。
Afterdinnertheguestsofbothsexesdistributedthemselvesaboutthefrontporchesandtheornamentalgroundsbelongingtothehotel,toenjoythecoolair;but,asthetwilightdeepenedtowarddarkness,theygatheredthemselvestogetherinthatsaddestandsolemnestandmostconstrainedofallplaces,thegreatblankdrawing-roomwhichisthechieffeatureofallcontinentalsummerhotels。Theretheygroupedthemselvesabout,incouplesandthrees,andmumbledinbatedvoices,andlookedtimidandhomelessandforlorn。
Therewasasmallpianointhisroom,aclattery,wheezy,asthmaticthing,certainlytheveryworstmiscarriageinthewayofapianothattheworldhasseen。Inturn,fiveorsixdejectedandhomesickladiesapproacheditdoubtingly,gaveitasingleinquiringthump,andretiredwiththelockjaw。Butthebossofthatinstrumentwastocome,nevertheless;andfrommyowncountry——fromArkansaw。
Shewasabrand-newbride,innocent,girlish,happyinherselfandhergraveandworshipingstriplingofahusband;shewasabouteighteen,justoutofschool,freefromaffections,unconsciousofthatpassionlessmultitudearoundher;
andtheveryfirsttimeshesmotethatoldwreckonerecognizedthatithadmetitsdestiny。Herstriplingbroughtanarmfulofagedsheet-musicfromtheirroom——
forthisbridewent\"heeled,\"asyoumightsay——andbenthimselflovinglyoverandgotreadytoturnthepages。
Thebridefetchedaswoopwithherfingersfromoneendofthekeyboardtotheother,justtogetherbearings,asitwere,andyoucouldseethecongregationsettheirteethwiththeagonyofit。Then,withoutanymorepreliminaries,sheturnedonallthehorrorsofthe\"BattleofPrague,\"
thatvenerableshivaree,andwadedchin-deepinthebloodoftheslain。Shemadeafairandhonorableaverageoftwofalsenotesineveryfive,buthersoulwasinarmsandsheneverstoppedtocorrect。Theaudiencestooditwithprettyfairgritforawhile,butwhenthecannonadewaxedhotterandfiercer,andthediscordaveragerosetofourinfive,theprocessionbegantomove。
Afewstragglersheldtheirgroundtenminuteslonger,butwhenthegirlbegantowringthetrueinwardnessoutofthe\"criesofthewounded,\"theystrucktheircolorsandretiredinakindofpanic。
Thereneverwasacompletervictory;Iwastheonlynon-combatantleftonthefield。Iwouldnothavedesertedmycountrywomananyhow,butindeedIhadnodesiresinthatdirection。Noneofuslikemediocrity,butweallreverenceperfection。Thisgirl\'smusicwasperfectioninitsway;itwastheworstmusicthathadeverbeenachievedonourplanetbyamerehumanbeing。
Imovedupclose,andneverlostastrain。Whenshegotthrough,Iaskedhertoplayitagain。Shediditwithapleasedalacrityandaheightenedenthusiasm。
ShemadeitALLdiscords,thistime。Shegotanamountofanguishintothecriesofthewoundedthatshedanewlightonhumansuffering。Shewasonthewar-pathalltheevening。Allthetime,crowdsofpeoplegatheredontheporchesandpressedtheirnosesagainstthewindowstolookandmarvel,butthebravestneverventuredin。
Thebridewentoffsatisfiedandhappywithheryoungfellow,whenherappetitewasfinallygorged,andthetouristsswarmedinagain。
WhatachangehascomeoverSwitzerland,andinfactallEurope,duringthiscentury!SeventyoreightyyearsagoNapoleonwastheonlymaninEuropewhocouldreallybecalledatraveler;hewastheonlymanwhohaddevotedhisattentiontoitandtakenapowerfulinterestinit;
hewastheonlymanwhohadtraveledextensively;
butnoweverybodygoeseverywhere;andSwitzerland,andmanyotherregionswhichwereunvisitedandunknownremotenessesahundredyearsago,areinourdaysabuzzinghiveofrestlessstrangerseverysummer。
ButIdigress。
Inthemorning,whenwelookedoutofourwindows,wesawawonderfulsight。Acrossthevalley,andapparentlyquiteneighborlyandcloseathand,thegiantformoftheJungfraurosecoldandwhiteintotheclearsky,beyondagatewayinthenearerhighlands。
Itremindedme,somehow,ofoneofthosecolossalbillowswhichswellssuddenlyupbesideone\'sship,atsea,sometimes,withitscrestandshoulderssnowywhite,andtherestofitsnobleproportionsstreakeddownwardwithcreamyfoam。
Itookoutmysketch-bookandmadealittlepictureoftheJungfrau,merelytogettheshape。[Figure9]
Idonotregardthisasoneofmyfinishedworks,infactI
donotrankitamongmyWorksatall;itisonlyastudy;
itishardlymorethanwhatonemightcallasketch。
Otherartistshavedonemethegracetoadmireit;butI
amsevereinmyjudgmentsofmyownpictures,andthisonedoesnotmoveme。
ItwashardtobelievethatthatloftywoodedrampartontheleftwhichsoovertopstheJungfrauwasnotactuallythehigherofthetwo,butitwasnot,ofcourse。
Itisonlytwoorthreethousandfeethigh,andofcoursehasnosnowuponitinsummer,whereastheJungfrauisnotmuchshorteroffourteenthousandfeethighandthereforethatlowestvergeofsnowonherside,whichseemsnearlydowntothevalleylevel,isreallyaboutseventhousandfeethigherupintheairthanthesummitofthatwoodedrampart。
Itisthedistancethatmakesthedeception。Thewoodedheightisbutfourorfivemilesremovedfromus,buttheJungfrauisfourorfivetimesthatdistanceaway。
Walkingdownthestreetofshops,inthefore-noon,I
wasattractedbyalargepicture,carved,frameandall,fromasingleblockofchocolate-coloredwood。
Therearepeoplewhoknoweverything。SomeofthesehadtoldusthatcontinentalshopkeepersalwaysraisetheirpricesonEnglishandAmericans。Manypeoplehadtoldusitwasexpensivetobuythingsthroughacourier,whereasIhadsupposeditwasjustthereverse。
WhenIsawthispicture,IconjecturedthatitwasworthmorethanthefriendIproposedtobuyitforwouldliketopay,butstillitwasworthwhiletoinquire;
soItoldthecouriertostepinandasktheprice,asifhewanteditforhimself;ItoldhimnottospeakinEnglish,andaboveallnottorevealthefactthathewasacourier。
ThenImovedonafewyards,andwaited。
Thecouriercamepresentlyandreportedtheprice。
Isaidtomyself,\"Itisahundredfrancstoomuch,\"
andsodismissedthematterfrommymind。ButintheafternoonIwaspassingthatplacewithHarris,andthepictureattractedmeagain。Westeppedin,toseehowmuchhigherbrokenGermanwouldraisetheprice。
Theshopwomannamedafigurejustahundredfrancslowerthanthecourierhadnamed。Thiswasapleasantsurprise。
IsaidIwouldtakeit。AfterIhadgivendirectionsastowhereitwastobeshipped,theshipped,theshopwomansaid,appealingly:
\"Ifyourplease,donotletyourcourierknowyouboughtit。\"
Thiswasanunexpectedremark。Isaid:
\"WhatmakesyouthinkIhaveacourier?\"
\"Ah,thatisverysimple;hetoldmehimself。\"
\"Hewasverythoughtful。Buttellme——whydidyouchargehimmorethanyouarechargingme?\"
\"Thatisverysimple,also:Idonothavetopayyouapercentage。\"
\"Oh,Ibegintosee。Youwouldhavehadtopaythecourierapercentage。\"
\"Undoubtedly。Thecourieralwayshashispercentage。
Inthiscaseitwouldhavebeenahundredfrancs。\"
\"Thenthetradesmandoesnotpayapartofit——
thepurchaserpaysallofit?\"
\"Thereareoccasionswhenthetradesmanandthecourieragreeuponapricewhichistwiceorthricethevalueofthearticle,thenthetwodivide,andbothgetapercentage。\"
\"Isee。Butitseemstomethatthepurchaserdoesallthepaying,eventhen。\"
\"Oh,tobesure!Itgoeswithoutsaying。\"
\"ButIhaveboughtthispicturemyself;thereforewhyshouldn\'tthecourierknowit?\"
Thewomanexclaimed,indistress:
\"Ah,indeeditwouldtakeallmylittleprofit!Hewouldcomeanddemandhishundredfrancs,andIshouldhavetopay。\"
\"Hehasnotdonethebuying。Youcouldrefuse。\"
\"Icouldnotdaretorefuse。Hewouldneverbringtravelershereagain。Morethanthat,hewoulddenouncemetotheothercouriers,theywoulddivertcustomfromme,andmybusinesswouldbeinjured。\"
Iwentawayinathoughtfulframeofmind。Ibegantoseewhyacouriercouldaffordtoworkforfifty-fivedollarsamonthandhisfares。AmonthortwolaterIwasabletounderstandwhyacourierdidnothavetopayanyboardandlodging,andwhymyhotelbillswerealwayslargerwhenIhadhimwithmethanwhenIlefthimbehind,somewhere,forafewdays。
Anotherthingwasalsoexplained,now,apparently。
InonetownIhadtakenthecouriertothebanktodothetranslatingwhenIdrewsomemoney。Ihadsatinthereading-roomtillthetransactionwasfinished。
Thenaclerkhadbroughtthemoneytomeinperson,andhadbeenexceedinglypolite,evengoingsofarastoprecedemetothedoorandholdingitopenformeandbowmeoutasifIhadbeenadistinguishedpersonage。
Itwasanewexperience。ExchangehadbeeninmyfavoreversinceIhadbeeninEurope,butjustthatonetime。
Igotsimplythefaceofmydraft,andnoextrafrancs,whereasIhadexpectedtogetquiteanumberofthem。
ThiswasthefirsttimeIhadeverusedthecourieratthebank。Ihadsuspectedsomethingthen,andaslongasheremainedwithmeafterwardImanagedbankmattersbymyself。
Still,ifIfeltthatIcouldaffordthetax,Iwouldnevertravelwithoutacourier,foragoodcourierisaconveniencewhosevaluecannotbeestimatedindollarsandcents。Withouthim,travelisabitterharassment,apurgatoryoflittleexasperatingannoyances,aceaselessandpitilesspunishment——Imeantoanirasciblemanwhohasnobusinesscapacityandisconfusedbydetails。
Withoutacourier,travelhasn\'tarayofpleasureinit,anywhere;butwithhimitisacontinuousandunruffleddelight。Heisalwaysathand,neverhastobesentfor;ifyourbellisnotansweredpromptly——anditseldomis——youhaveonlytoopenthedoorandspeak,thecourierwillhear,andhewillhavetheorderattendedtoorraiseaninsurrection。Youtellhimwhatdayyouwillstart,andwhitheryouaregoing——leavealltheresttohim。Youneednotinquireabouttrains,orfares,orcarchanges,orhotels,oranythingelse。
Atthepropertimehewillputyouinacaboranomnibus,anddriveyoutothetrainortheboat;hehaspackedyourluggageandtransferredit,hehaspaidallthebills。
Otherpeoplehaveprecededyouhalfanhourtoscrambleforimpossibleplacesandlosetheirtempers,butyoucantakeyourtime;thecourierhassecuredyourseatsforyou,andyoucanoccupythematyourleisure。
Atthestation,thecrowdmashoneanothertopulpintheefforttogettheweigher\'sattentiontotheirtrunks;
theydisputehotlywiththesetyrants,whoarecoolandindifferent;theygettheirbaggagebillets,atlast,andthenhaveanothersqueezeandanotherrageoverthedishearteningbusinessoftryingtogetthemrecordedandpaidfor,andstillanotherovertheequallydishearteningbusinessoftryingtogetnearenoughtotheticketofficetobuyaticket;andnow,withtheirtempersgonetothedogs,theymuststandpennedupandpackedtogether,ladenwithwrapsandsatchelsandshawl-straps,withthewearywifeandbabies,inthewaiting-room,tillthedoorsarethrownopen——andthenallhandsmakeagrandfinalrushtothetrain,finditfull,andhavetostandontheplatformandfretuntilsomemorecarsareputon。
Theyareinaconditiontokillsomebodybythistime。
Meantime,youhavebeensittinginyourcar,smoking,andobservingallthismiseryintheextremestcomfort。
Onthejourneytheguardispoliteandwatchful——won\'tallowanybodytogetintoyourcompartment——tellsthemyouarejustrecoveringfromthesmall-poxanddonotliketobedisturbed。Forthecourierhasmadeeverythingrightwiththeguard。Atway-stationsthecouriercomestoyourcompartmenttoseeifyouwantaglassofwater,oranewspaper,oranything;ateating-stationshesendsluncheonouttoyou,whiletheotherpeoplescrambleandworryinthedining-rooms。Ifanythingbreaksaboutthecaryouarein,andastation-masterproposestopackyouandyouragentintoacompartmentwithstrangers,thecourierrevealstohimconfidentiallythatyouareaFrenchdukeborndeafanddumb,andtheofficialcomesandmakesaffablesignsthathehasorderedachoicecartobeaddedtothetrainforyou。
Atcustom-housesthemultitudefiletediouslythrough,hotandirritated,andlookonwhiletheofficersburrowintothetrunksandmakeamessofeverything;
butyouhandyourkeystothecourierandsitstill。
Perhapsyouarriveatyourdestinationinarain-stormattenatnight——yougenerallydo。Themultitudespendhalfanhourverifyingtheirbaggageandgettingittransferredtotheomnibuses;butthecourierputsyouintoavehiclewithoutamoment\'slossoftime,andwhenyoureachyourhotelyoufindyourroomshavebeensecuredtwoorthreedaysinadvance,everythingisready,youcangoatoncetobed。Someofthoseotherpeoplewillhavetodriftaroundtotwoorthreehotels,intherain,beforetheyfindaccommodations。
Ihavenotsetdownhalfofthevirtuesthatarevestedinagoodcourier,butIthinkIhavesetdownasufficiencyofthemtoshowthatanirritablemanwhocanaffordoneanddoesnotemployhimisnotawiseeconomist。MycourierwastheworstoneinEurope,yethewasagooddealbetterthannoneatall。
Itcouldnotpayhimtobeabetteronethanhewas,becauseIcouldnotaffordtobuythingsthroughhim。
Hewasagoodenoughcourierforthesmallamounthegotoutofhisservice。Yes,totravelwithacourierisbliss,totravelwithoutoneisthereverse。
Ihavehaddealingswithsomeverybadcouriers;butIhavealsohaddealingswithonewhomightfairlybecalledperfection。
HewasayoungPolander,namedJosephN。Verey。Hespokeeightlanguages,andseemedtobeequallyathomeinallofthem;hewasshrewd,prompt,posted,andpunctual;
hewasfertileinresources,andsingularlygiftedinthematterofovercomingdifficulties;henotonlyknewhowtodoeverythinginhisline,butheknewthebestwaysandthequickest;hewashandywithchildrenandinvalids;
allhisemployerneededtodowastotakelifeeasyandleaveeverythingtothecourier。Hisaddressis,careofMessrs。Gay&Son,Strand,London;hewasformerlyaconductorofGay\'stouristparties。Excellentcouriersaresomewhatrare;ifthereaderisabouttotravel,hewillfindittohisadvantagetomakeanoteofthisone。
CHAPTERXXXIII
[WeClimbFar——byBuggy]
ThebeautifulGiesbachFallisnearInterlaken,ontheothersideofthelakeofBrienz,andisilluminatedeverynightwiththosegorgeoustheatricalfireswhosenameIcannotcalljustatthismoment。Thiswassaidtobeaspectaclewhichthetouristoughtbynomeanstomiss。Iwasstronglytempted,butIcouldnotgotherewithpropriety,becauseonegoesinaboat。
ThetaskwhichIhadsetmyselfwastowalkoverEuropeonfoot,notskimoveritinaboat。Ihadmadeatacitcontractwithmyself;itwasmydutytoabidebyit。
Iwaswillingtomakeboattripsforpleasure,butIcouldnotconscientiouslymaketheminthewayofbusiness。
Itcostmesomethingofapangtolosethatfinesight,butIliveddownthedesire,andgainedinmyself-respectthroughthetriumph。Ihadafinerandagrandersight,however,whereIwas。ThiswasthemightydomeoftheJungfrausoftlyoutlinedagainsttheskyandfaintlysilveredbythestarlight。Therewassomethingsubduingintheinfluenceofthatsilentandsolemnandawfulpresence;oneseemedtomeettheimmutable,theindestructible,theeternal,facetoface,andtofeelthetrivialandfleetingnatureofhisownexistencethemoresharplybythecontrast。
Onehadthesenseofbeingunderthebroodingcontemplationofaspirit,notaninertmassofrocksandice——aspiritwhichhadlookeddown,throughtheslowdriftoftheages,uponamillionvanishedracesofmen,andjudgedthem;
andwouldjudgeamillionmore——andstillbethere,watching,unchangedandunchangeable,afteralllifeshouldbegoneandtheearthhavebecomeavacantdesolation。