Hecamehomewithhisnotes，andfoundRosabeaminginacrisppeignoir，andherlovelyheaditsnaturalsizeandshape，high-bredandelegant。Hesatdown，andwithherhandinhisproceededtodescribethehousestoher，whenawaiterthrewopenthedoor——
\"Mrs。JohnCole。\"
\"Florence!\"criedRosa，startingup。
InflowedFlorence:theybothutteredalittlesquawkofdelight，andwentateachotherliketwolittletigresses，andkissedinswiftalternationwithasingularardor，drawingtheircrestsbacklikesnakes，andthendartingthemforwardandinflictingwhat，tothemalephilosopherlookingon，seemedhardkisses，violentkisses，ratherthanthetenderonestobeexpectedfromtwotendercreaturesembracingeachother。
\"Darling，\"saidRosa，\"Iknewyouwouldbethefirst。Didn\'tI
tellyouso，Christopher?——Myhusband——mydarlingFlorry!Sitdown，love，andtellmeeverything；hehasjustbeenlookingoutforahouse。Ah!youhavegotallthatoverlongago:shehasbeenmarriedsixmonths。Florry，youarehandsomerthanever；andwhatabeautifuldress!Ah!Londonistheplace。RealBrussels，I
declare，\"andshetookholdofherfriend\'slaceandgloatedonit。
Christophersmiledgood-naturedly，andsaid，\"Idaresayyouladieshaveagooddealtosaytoeachother。\"
\"Oceans，\"saidRosa。
\"Iwillgoandhunthousesagain。\"
\"There\'sagoodhusband，\"saidMrs。Cole，assoonasthedoorclosedonhim，\"andsuchafineman!Why，hemustbesixfeet。
Mineisrathershort。Butheisverygood；refusesmenothing。Mywillislaw。\"
\"Thatisallright——youaresosensible；butIwantgoverningalittle，andIlikeit——actually。Didthedressmakerfindit，dear?\"
\"Oh，no!Ihaditbyme。IboughtitatBrusselsonourweddingtour:itisdearertherethaninLondon。\"
Shesaidthisasif\"dearer\"and\"better\"weresynonymous。
\"Butaboutyourhouse，Rosiedear?\"
\"Yes，darling，I\'lltellyouallaboutit。Ineversawamoirethisshadebefore。Idon\'tcareforthemingeneral；butthisissodistingue。\"
Florencerewardedherwithakiss。
\"Thehouse，\"saidRosa。\"Oh，hehasseenoneinPortmanStreet，andoneinGloucesterPlace。\"
\"Oh，thatwillneverdo，\"criedMrs。Cole。\"Itisnousebeingaphysicianinthoseout-of-the-wayplaces。HemustbeinMayfair。\"
\"Musthe?\"
\"Ofcourse。Besides，thenmyJohnniecancallhiminwhentheyarejustgoingtodie。Johnnieisageneralprac。，andmakestwothousandayear；andheshallcallyouronein；buthemustliveinMayfair。Why，Rosie，youwouldnotbesuchagooseastoliveinthoseplaces——theyarequitegoneby。\"
\"Ishalldowhateveryouadviseme，dear。Oh，whatacomforttohaveadearfriend:andsixmonthsmarried，andknowsthings。Howrichlyitistrimmed!Why，itisnearlyalltrimmings。\"
\"Thatisthefashion。\"
\"Oh!\"
Andafterthatbigwordtherewasnomoretobesaid。
Thesetwoladiesintheirconversationgravitatedtowardsdress，andfellflatoniteveryhalf-minute。Thatgreatandelevatingtopicheldthembyasilkencord，butitallowedthemtoflutterupwardsintoothertopics；andinthoseintervals，numerousthoughbrief，theladywhohadbeenmarriedsixmonthsfoundtimetoinstructthematrimonialnovicewithgreatauthority，andevenashadeofpomposity。\"Mydear，thewayladiesandgentlemengetahouse——inthefirstplace，youdon\'tgoaboutyourselflikethat，andyounevergotothepeoplethemselves，oryouaresuretobetakenin，buttoarespectablehouse-agent。\"
\"Yes，dear，thatmustbethebestway，onewouldthink。\"
\"Ofcourseitis；andyouaskforahouseinMayfair，andheshowsyouseveral，andrecommendsyouthebest，andseesyouarenotcheated。\"
\"Thankyou，love，\"saidRosa；\"nowIknowwhattodo；I\'llnotforgetaword。Andthetrainsobeautifullyshaped!Ah!itisonlyinLondonorParistheycanmakeadressflowbehindlikethat，\"etc。，etc。
Dr。Stainescamebacktodinneringoodspirits；hehadfoundahouseinHarewoodSquare；goodentrancehall，wherehisgratuitouspatientsmightsitonbenches；gooddining-roomwherehissuperiorpatientsmightwait；andgoodlibrary，tobeusedasaconsulting-
room。Rentonlyeighty-fivepoundsperannum。
ButRosatoldhimthatwouldneverdo；aphysicianmustbeinthefashionablepartofthetown。
\"Eventually，\"saidChristopher；\"butsurelyatfirststarting——andyouknowtheysaylittleboatsshouldnotgotoofarfromshore。\"
ThenRosarepeatedallherfriend\'sarguments，andseemedsounhappyattheideaofnotlivingnearher，thatStaines，whohadnotyetsaidthehardword\"no\"toher，gavein；consolinghisprudencewiththereflectionthat，afterall，Mr。Colecouldputmanyaguineainhisway，forMr。Colewasmiddle-aged，——thoughhiswifewasyoung，——andhadreallyaverylargepractice。
Sonextday，thenewly-weddedpaircalledonahouse-agentinMayfair，andhissonandpartnerwentwiththemtoseveralplaces。
TherentsofhousesequaltothatinHarewoodSquarewerethreehundredpoundsayearatleast，andapremiumtoboot。
Christophertoldhimthesewerequitebeyondthemark。\"Verywell，\"saidtheagent。\"ThenI\'llshowyouaBijou。\"
Rosaclappedherhands。\"Thatisthethingforus。Wedon\'twantalargehouse，onlyabeautifulone，andinMayfair。\"
\"ThentheBijouwillbesuretosuityou。\"
HetookthemtotheBijou。
TheBijouhadasmalldining-roomwithoneverylargewindowintwosheetsofplateglass，andaprojectingbalconyfullofflowers；astillsmallerlibrary，whichopenedonasquareyardenclosed。
Herewereagreatmanypots，withflowersdeadordyingfromneglect。Onthefirstfloorafair-sizeddrawing-room，andatinyoneattheback:onthesecondfloor，onegoodbedroom，andadressing-room，orlittlebedroom:threegarretsabove。
Rosawasinecstasies。\"Itisanest，\"saidshe。
\"Itisabank-note，\"saidtheagent，stimulatingequalenthusiasm，afterhisfashion。\"Youcanalwaysselltheleaseagainformoremoney。\"
Christopherkeptcool。\"Idon\'twantahousetosell，buttolivein，anddomybusiness；Iamaphysician:nowthedrawing-roomisbuiltovertheentrancetoamews；thebackroomsalllookintoamews:weshallhavetheeternalnoiseandsmellofamews。Mywife\'srestwillbebrokenbythecarriagesrollinginandout。
Thehallisfearfullysmallandstuffy。Therentisabominablyhigh；andwhatisthepremiumfor，Iwonder?\"
\"AlwaysapremiuminMayfair，sir。Aleaseispropertyhere:thegentlemanisnotacquaintedwiththispart，madam。\"
\"Oh，yes，heis，\"saidRosa，asboldlyasasixyears\'wife:\"heknowseverything。\"
\"ThenheknowsthatahouseofthiskindatahundredandthirtypoundsayearinMayfairisabank-note。\"
StainesturnedtoRosa。\"Thepoorpatients，whereamItoreceivethem?\"
\"Inthestable，\"suggestedthehouseagent。
\"Oh!\"saidRosa，shocked。
\"Well，then，thecoach-house。Why，there\'splentyofroomforabrougham，andonehorse，andfiftypoorpatientsatatime:beggarsmusn\'tbechoosers；ifyougivethemphysicgratis，thatisenough:
youain\'tboundtofind\'emapalacetositdownin，andhotcoffeeandrumpsteaksallround，doctor。\"
ThistickledRosasothatsheburstoutlaughing，andthenceforwardgiggledatintervals，witofthisrefinednaturehavingallthecharmofnoveltyforher。
Theyinspectedthestables，whichwereindeedtheoneredeemingfeatureinthehorridlittleBijou；andthentheagentwouldshowthemthekitchen，andthenewstove。HeexpatiatedonthistoMrs。
Staines。\"Cookadinnerforthirtypeople，madam。\"
\"Andthere\'sroomforthemtoeatit——intheroad，\"saidStaines。
Theagentremindedhimtherewerelargerplacestobehad，byaverysimpleprocess，viz。，payingforthem。
Stainesthoughtofthelarge，comfortablehouseinHarewoodSquare。
\"Onehundredandthirtypoundsayearforthispokylittlehole?\"
hegroaned。
\"Why，itisnothingatallforaBijou。\"
\"Butitistoomuchforabandbox。\"
Rosalaidherhandonhisarm，withanimploringglance。
\"Well，\"saidhe，\"I\'llsubmittotherent，butIreallycannotgivethepremium，itistooridiculous。Heoughttobribemetorentit，notIhim。\"
\"Can\'tbedonewithout，sir。\"
\"Well，I\'llgiveahundredpoundsandnomore。\"
\"Impossible，sir。\"
\"Thengoodmorning。Now，dearest，justcomeandseethehouseatHarewoodSquare，——eighty-fivepoundsandnopremium。\"
\"Willyouobligemewithyouraddress，doctor?\"saidtheagent。
\"Dr。Staines，Morley\'sHotel。\"
AndsotheyleftMayfair。
Rosasighedandsaid，\"Oh，thenicelittleplace；andwehavelostitfortwohundredpounds。\"
\"Twohundredpoundsisagreatdealforustothrowaway。\"
\"BeingneartheColeswouldsoonhavemadethatuptoyou:andsuchacoseylittlenest。\"
\"Wellthehousewillnotrunaway。\"
\"Butsomebodyissuretosnapitup。ItisaBijou。\"Shewasdisappointed，andhalfinclinedtopout。ButsheventedherfeelingsinalettertoherbelovedFlorry，andappearedatdinnerassweetasusual。
Duringdinneranotecamefromtheagent，acceptingDr。Staine\'soffer。Heglozedthematterthus:hehadpersuadedtheowneritwasbettertotakeagoodtenantatamoderateloss，thantolettheBijoubeuninhabitedduringthepresentrainyseason。Anassignmentofthelease——whichcontainedtheusualcovenants——wouldbepreparedimmediately，andDr。Stainescouldhavepossessioninforty-eighthours，bypayingthepremium。
Rosawasdelighted，andassoonasdinnerwasover，andthewaitersgone，shecameandkissedChristopher。
Hesmiled，andsaid，\"Well，youarepleased；thatistheprincipalthing。Ihavesavedtwohundredpounds，andthatissomething。Itwillgotowardsfurnishing。\"
\"La!yes，\"saidRosa，\"Iforgot。Weshallhavetogetfurniturenow。Hownice!\"Itwasapleasurethemanofforecastcouldhavewillinglydispensedwith；buthesmiledather，andtheydiscussedfurniture，andChristopher，whoseretentivememoryhadpickedupalittleofeverything，saidtherewerewholesaleupholsterersintheCitywhosoldcheaperthantheWest-endhouses，andhethoughtthebestwaywastomeasuretheroomsintheBijou，andgotothecitywithaclearideaofwhattheywanted；askthepricesofvariousnecessaryarticles，andthenmakealist，anddemandadiscountoffifteenpercentonthewholeorder，beingsoconsiderable，andpaidforincash。
Rosaacquiesced，andtoldChristopherhewasthecleverestmaninEngland。
Aboutnineo\'clockMrs。Colecameintocondolewithherfriend，andheardthegoodnews。WhenRosatoldherhowtheythoughtoffurnishing，shesaid，\"Ohno，youmustnotdothat；youwillpaydoubleforeverything。ThatisthemistakeJohnnieandImade；andafterthatafriendofminetookmetotheauction-rooms，andIsaweverythingsold——oh，suchbargains；half，andlessthanhalf，theirvalue。Shehasfurnishedherhousealmostentirelyfromsales，andshehastheloveliestthingsintheworld——suchducksoftables，andjardinieres，andthings；andbeautifulrarechina——herhouseswarmswithit——foranoldsong。Asaleistheplace。Andthensoamusing。\"
\"Yes，but，\"saidChristopher，\"Ishouldnotlikemywifetoencounterapublicroom。\"
\"Notalone，ofcourse；butwithme。La!Dr。Staines，theyaretoofullofbuyingandsellingtotroubletheirheadsaboutus。\"
\"Oh，Christopher，doletmegowithher。AmIalwaystobeachild?\"
Thusappealedtobeforeastranger，Stainesrepliedwarmly，\"No，dearest，no；youcannotpleasemebetterthanbybeginninglifeinearnest。Ifyoutwoladiestogethercanfaceanauction-room，gobyallmeans；onlyImustaskyounottobuychinaorormulu，oranythingthatwillbreakorspoil，butonlysolid，goodfurniture。\"
\"Won\'tyoucomewithus?\"
\"No；oryoumightfeelyourselfinleading-strings。RemembertheBijouisasmallhouse；chooseyourfurnituretofitit，andthenweshallsavesomethingbyitsbeingsosmall。\"
ThiswasWednesday。TherewasaweeklysaleinOxfordStreetonFridays；andtheladiesmadetheappointmentaccordingly。
Nextday，afterbreakfast，Christopherwassilentandthoughtfulawhile，andatlastsaidtoRosa，\"I\'llshowyouIdon\'tlookonyouasachild；I\'llconsultyouinadelicatematter。\"
Rosa\'seyessparkled。
\"ItisaboutmyUnclePhilip。Hehasbeenverycruel；hehaswoundedmedeeply；hehaswoundedmethroughmywife。Ineverthoughthewouldrefusetocometoourmarriage。\"
\"Anddidhe?Younevershowedmehisletter。\"
\"Youwerenotmywifethen。Ikeptanaffrontfromyou；butnow，yousee，Ikeepnothing。\"
\"DearChristie!\"
\"Iamsohappy，Ihavegotoverthatsting——almost；andthememoryofmanykindactscomesbacktome；andIdon\'tknowwhattodo。
Itseemsungratefulnottovisithim——itseemsalmostmeantocall。\"
\"I\'lltellyou；takemetoseehimdirectly。Hewon\'thateusforever，ifheseesusoften。Wemayaswellbeginatonce。
Nobodyhatesmelong。\"
Christopherwasproudofhiswife\'scourageandwisdom。Hekissedher，beggedhertoputontheplainestdressshecould，andtheywenttogethertocallonUnclePhilip。
WhentheygottohishouseinGloucesterPlace，PortmanSquare，Rosa\'sheartbegantoquake，andshewasrightgladwhentheservantsaid\"Notathome。\"
Theylefttheircardsandaddress；andshepersuadedChristophertotakehertothesale-roomtoseethethings。
Alotofbrokerswerethere，likevultures；andoneafteranothersteppedforwardandpesteredthemtoemployhiminthemorning。
Dr。Stainesdeclinedtheirservicescivillybutfirmly，andheandRosalookedoveraquantityoffurniture，andsettledwhatsortofthingstobuy。
Anotherbrokercameup，andwheneverthecouplestoppedbeforeanarticle，proceededtopraiseitassomethingmostextraordinary。
Staineslistenedincold，satiricalsilence，andtoldhiswife，inFrench，todothesame。Notwithstandingtheirmarkeddisgust，theimpudent，intrusivefellowstucktothem，andforcedhisvenalcriticismonthem，andmadethemuncomfortable，andshortenedtheirtourofobservation。
\"IthinkIshallcomewithyouto-morrow，\"saidChristopher，\"orI
shallhavetheseblackguardspesteringyou。\"
\"Oh，Florrywillsendthemtotheright-about。Sheisasbraveasalion。\"
NextdayDr。StaineswassentforintotheCityattwelvetopaythemoneyandreceivetheleaseoftheBijou，andthisandthetakingpossessionoccupiedhimtillfouro\'clock，whenhecametohishotel。
Meantime，hiswifeandMrs。Colehadgonetotheauction-room。
Itwasalargeroom，withagoodsprinklingofpeople，butnotcrowdedexceptaboutthetable。Attheheadofthistable——fulltwentyfeetlong——wastheauctioneer\'spulpit，andthelotswerebroughtinturntotheotherendofthetableforsightandsale。
\"Wemusttryandgetaseat，\"saidtheenterprisingMrs。Cole，andpushedboldlyin；thetimidRosafollowedstrictlyinherwake，andsoevadedthehumanwavesherleaderclove。Theywereimportunedateverystepbybrokersthrustingcataloguesonthem，withoffersoftheirservices，yettheysoongottothetable。Agentlemanresignedonechair，abrokeranother，andtheywereseated。
Mrs。Stainesletdownhalfherveil，butMrs。Colesurveyedthecompanypoint-blank。
Thebrokerwhohadgivenuphisseat，andnowstoodbehindRosa，offeredherhiscatalogue。\"No，thankyou，\"saidRosa；\"Ihaveone；\"andsheproducedit，andstudiedit，yetmanagedtolookfurtivelyatthecompany。
TherewerenotaboveadozenprivatepersonsvisiblefromwhereRosasat；perhapsasmanymoreinthewholeroom。Theywereeasilydistinguishablebytheircleanlyappearance:thedealers，maleorfemale，weremoreorlessrusty，greasy，dirty，aquiline。Noteventheamateurswerebrightlydressed；thatfundamentalerrorwasconfinedtoMesdamesColeandStaines。Theexperienced，howeverwealthy，donothuntbargainsinsilkandsatin。
Theauctioneercalled\"Lot7。Foursaucepans，twotrays，akettle，abootjack，andatowel-horse。\"
Thesewereputupattwoshillings，andspeedilyknockeddownforfivetoafatoldwomaninagreasyvelvetjacket；blindindustryhadsewedbuglesonit，notartfully，butagriculturally。
\"Theladyontheleft!\"saidtheauctioneertohisclerk。Thatmeant\"Getthemoney。\"
Theoldladyplungedahugepawintoahugepocket，andpulledoutahugehandfulofcoin——copper，silver，andgold——andpaidforthelot；andRosasurveyedherdirtyhandsandnailswithinnocentdismay。\"Oh，whatadreadfulcreature!\"shewhispered；\"andwhatcanshewantwiththoseoldrubbishythings?Isawaholeinonefromhere。\"Thebrokeroverheard，andsaid，\"Sheisadealer，ma\'am，andthethingsweregivenaway。She\'llsellthemforaguinea，easy。\"
\"Didn\'tItellyou?\"saidMrs。Cole。
Soonafterthisthesuperiorlotscameon，andsixveryneatbedroomchairsweresoldtoallappearanceforfifteenshillings。
Thenextlotwasidentical，andRosahazardedabid，——\"Sixteenshillings。\"
Instantlysomedealer，oneofthehook-nosedthatgatheredroundeachlotasitcametothefootofthetable，cried\"Eighteenshillings。\"
\"Nineteen，\"saidRosa。
\"Aguinea，\"saidthedealer。
\"Don\'tletitgo，\"saidthebrokerbehindher。\"Don\'tletitgo，ma\'am。\"
Shecoloredattheintrusion，andleftoffbiddingdirectly，andaddressedherselftoMrs。Cole。\"WhyshouldIgivesomuch，whenthelastweresoldforfifteenshillings?\"
Therealreasonwasthatthefirstlotwasnotbidforatall，exceptbytheproprietor。However，thebrokergaveheraverydifferentsolution；hesaid，\"Thetradealwaysrunupaladyoragentleman。Letmebidforyou；theywon\'trunmeup；theyknowbetter。\"
Rosadidnotreply，butlookedatMrs。Cole。
\"Yes，dear，\"saidthatlady；\"youhadmuchbetterlethimbidforyou。\"
\"Verywell，\"saidRosa；\"youcanbidforthischestofdrawers——lot25。\"
Whenlot25cameon，thebrokerbidinthesilliestpossibleway，ifhisobjecthadbeentogetabargain。Hebegantobidearlyandostentatiously；thearticlewasprotectedbysomebodyorothertherepresent，whonowofcoursesawhiswayclear；heranitupaudaciously，anditwaspurchasedforRosaataboutthepriceitcouldhavebeenboughtforatashop。
Thenextthingshewantedwasasetofoakchairs。
Theywentuptotwenty-eightpounds；thenshesaid，\"Ishallgivenomore，sir。\"
\"Betternotlosethem，\"saidtheagent；\"theyareagreatbargain；\"
andbidanotherpoundforheronhisownresponsibility。
Theywerestillrunup，andRosaperemptorilyrefusedtogiveanymore。Shelostthem，accordingly，bygoodluck。Herfaithfulbrokerlookedblank；sodidtheproprietor。
But，asthesaleproceeded，shebeingyoung，thecompetition，thoughmostofitsham，beingartfulandexciting，andthetraitorsheemployedconstantlypuffingeveryarticle，shewasdrawnintowishingforthings，andbiddingbyherfeelings。
Thenhertraitorplayedagamethathasbeenplayedahundredtimes，andtheperpetratorsneveroncelynched，astheyoughttobe，onthespot。Hesignalledaconfederatewithahookednose；
theJewrascalbidagainsttheChristianscoundrel，andsotheyranupthemoreenticingthingstotwicetheirvalueunderthehammer。
Rosagotflushed，andhereyegleamedlikeagambler\'s，andsheboughtawaylikewildfire。Inwhichsportshecaughtsightofanoldgentleman，withlittleblackeyesthatkepttwinklingather。
ShecomplainedoftheseeyestoMrs。Cole。\"Whydoeshetwinkleso?Icanseeitisatme。Iamdoingsomethingfoolish——IknowI
am。\"
Mrs。Coleturned，andfixedahaughtystareontheoldgentleman。
Wouldyoubelieveit?insteadofsinkingthroughthefloor，hesathisground，andretortedwithacold，cleargrin。
Butnow，wheneverRosa\'sagentbidforher，andtheothermanofstrawagainsthim，theblackeyestwinkled，andRosa\'scouragebegantooozeaway。Atlastshesaid，\"Thatisenoughforoneday。
Ishallgo。Whocouldbearthoseeyes?\"
Thebrokertookheraddress；sodidtheauctioneer\'sclerk。Theauctioneeraskedherfornodeposit；herbeautiful，innocent，andhigh-bredfacewasenoughforamanwhowasalwaysreadingfaces，andinterpretingthem。
Andsotheyretired。
Butthischarmingsexislikethatsameauctioneer\'shammer，itcannotgoabruptly。Itisalwaysgoing——going——going——alongtimebeforeitisgone。Ithinkitwouldperhapsloiteratthedoorofajail，withtheorderofreleaseinitshand，aftersixyears\'
confinement。Gettinguptogoquenchesinitthedesiretogo。Sotheseladieshavinggotuptogo，turnedandlingered，andhungfiresolong，thatatlastanothersetofoakchairscameup。\"Oh!
Imustseewhatthesegofor，\"saidRosa，atthedoor。
ThebiddingwasmightylanguidnowRosa\'sbrokerwasnotstimulatingit；andtheauctioneerwasjustknockingdowntwelvechairs——oakandleather——andtwoarm-chairs，fortwentypounds，when，castinghiseyesaround，hecaughtsightofRosalookingathimratherexcited。Helookedinquiringlyather。Shenoddedslightly；heknockedthemdowntoherattwentyguineas，andtheywerereallyagreatbargain。
\"Twenty-two，\"criedthedealer。
\"Toolate，\"saidtheauctioneer。
\"Ispokewiththehammer，sir。\"
\"Afterthehammer，Isaacs。\"
\"ShelpmeGod，wewastogether。\"
Oneortwomoreofhistribeconfirmedthispiousfalsehood，andclamoredtohavethemputupagain。
\"Callthenextlot，\"saidtheauctioneer，peremptorily。\"Makeupyourmindalittlequickernexttime，Mr。Isaacs；youhavebeenlongenoughatittoknowthevalueofoakandmoroccar。\"