第17章
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  Hewasnotsurprised,therefore,whenhereceivednoreplytohisring。

  ThattherewastheslightesttruthinBessieBailey’sabsurdelopement’idea,Bertramdidnot,ofcourse,foraninstantbelieve。Theonlythingthatrankledaboutthatwasthefactthatshehadsuggestedsuchathing,andthatMissWinthropandthosesillychildrenhadheardher。HerecognizedhalfofBessie’sfriendsasneighborhoodyoungsters,andheknewverywellthattherewouldbemanyaquietlaughathisexpensearoundvariousBeaconStreetdinner-

  tablesthatnight。Atthethoughtofthosedinner-tables,hescowledagain。_He_hadnodinner-table——atleast,hehadnodinneronit!

  WhothemanmightbeBertramthoughthecouldeasilyguess。ItwaseitherArkwrightorCalderwell,ofcourse;andprobablythattiresomeAliceGreggorywasmixedupinitsomehow。

  HedidwishBilly——

  Sixo’clockcame,thenhalf-past。Bertramwasindeedfrightenednow,buthewasmoreangry,andstillmorehungry。Hehad,infact,reachedthatstateofblindunreasonablenesssaidtobepeculiartohungrymalesfromtimeimmemorial。

  Attenminutesofsevenakeyclickedinthelockoftheouterdoor,andWilliamandBillyenteredthehall。

  Itwasalmostdark。Bertramcouldnotseetheirfaces。Hehadnotlightedthehallatall。

  Well,’hebegansharply,isthisthewayyoureceiveyourcallers,Billy?IcamehomeandfoundMissWinthropjustleaving——nooneheretoreceiveher!Where’veyoubeen?Where’sEliza?Where’smydinner?OfcourseIdon’tmeantoscold,Billy,butthereisalimittoevenmypatience——andit’sreachednow。Ican’thelpsuggestingthatifyouwouldtendtoyourhusbandandyourhomealittlemore,andgogallivantingoffwithCalderwellandArkwrightandAliceGreggoryalittleless,that——WhereisEliza,anyway?’hefinishedirritably,switchingonthelightswithasnap。

  Therewasamomentofdeadsilence。AtBertram’sfirstwordsBillyandWilliamhadstoppedshort。Neitherhadmovedsince。NowWilliamturnedandbegantospeak,butBillyinterrupted。Shemetherhusband’sgazesteadily。

  Iwillbedownatoncetogetyourdinner,’

  shesaidquietly。Elizawillnotcometo-night。

  Peteisdead。’

  Bertramstartedforwardwithaquickcry。

  Dead!Oh,Billy!Thenyouwere——_there!_

  Billy!’

  Buthiswifedidnotapparentlyhearhim。Shepassedhimwithoutturningherhead,andwentonupthestairs,leavinghimtomeetthesorrowful,accusingeyesofWilliam。

  Theyounghusband’sapologieswereprofuseandabject。Bertramwasheartilyashamedofhimself,andwasmanenoughtoacknowledgeit。

  AlmostonhiskneeshebeggedBillytoforgivehim;andinafrenzyofself-denunciationhefollowedherdownintothekitchenthatnight,piteouslybeseechinghertospeaktohim,tojust_look_athim,even,sothathemightknowhewasnotutterlydespised——thoughhedid,indeed,deservetobemorethandespised,hemoaned。

  AtfirstBillydidnotspeak,orevenvouchsafeaglanceinhisdirection。Veryquietlyshewentaboutherpreparationsforasimplemeal,payingapparentlynomoreattentiontoBertramthanasifhewerenotthere。Butthatherearswereonlyseemingly,andnotreallydeaf,wasshownveryclearlyalittlelater,when,ataparticularlyabjectwailonthepartofthebabblingshadowatherheels,Billychokedintoalittlegasp,halflaughter,halfsob。Itwasalloverthen。Bertramhadherinhisarmsinatwinkling,whiletothefloorclatteredandrolledaknifeandahalf-peeledbakedpotato。

  Naturally,afterthat,therecouldbenomoredignifiedsilencesonthepartoftheinjuredwife。

  Therewere,instead,half-smiles,tears,sobs,atremuloustellingofPete’sgoingandhismessages,followedbyatearfullisteningtoBertram’sstoryofthetorturehehadenduredatthehandsofMissWinthrop,BessieBailey,andanempty,dinnerlesshouse。Andthus,inonecornerofthekitchen,sometimelater,ahungry,desperateWilliamfoundthem,thehalf-peeled,coldbakedpotatostillattheirfeet。

  Tornbetweenhiscravingforfoodandhisdesirenottointerferewithanypossiblepeace-

  making,Williamwasobviouslyhesitatingwhattodo,whenBillyglancedupandsawhim。Shesaw,too,atthesametime,theempty,blazinggas-stoveburner,andthepileofhalf-preparedpotatoes,towarmwhichtheburnerhadlongsincebeenlighted。Withalittlecryshebrokeawayfromherhusband’sarms。

  Mercy!andhere’spoorUncleWilliam,blesshisheart,withnotathingtoeatyet!’

  Theyallgotdinnerthen,together,withmanyasighandquick-comingtearaseverywheretheymetsomesadreminderofthegentleoldhandsthatwouldneveragainministertotheircomfort。

  Itwasasilentmeal,andlittle,afterall,waseaten,thoughbraveattemptsatcheerfulnessandnaturalnessweremadebyallthree。Bertram,especially,talked,andtriedtomakesurethattheshadowonBilly’sfacewasatleastnottheonehisownconducthadbroughtthere。

  Foryoudo——yousurelydoforgiveme,don’tyou?’hebegged,ashefollowedherintothekitchenafterthesorrymealwasover。

  Why,yes,dear,yes,’sighedBilly,tryingtosmile。

  Andyou’llforget?’

  Therewasnoanswer。

  Billy!Andyou’llforget?’Bertram’svoicewasinsistent,reproachful。

  Billychangedcolorandbitherlip。Shelookedplainlydistressed。

  Billy!’criedtheman,stillmorereproachfully。

  But,Bertram,Ican’tforget——quiteyet,’

  falteredBilly。

  Bertramfrowned。Foraminutehelookedasifhewereabouttotakeupthematterseriouslyandargueitwithher;butthenextmomenthesmiledandtossedhisheadwithjauntyplayfulness——

  Bertram,totellthetruth,hadnowhadquiteenoughofwhatheprivatelytermedscenes’andheroics’;and,manlike,hewasveryardentlylongingfortheoldeasy-goingfriendliness,withallunpleasantnessbanishedtooblivion。

  Oh,butyou’llhavetoforget,’heclaimed,withcheeryinsistence,foryou’vepromisedtoforgiveme——andonecan’tforgivewithoutforgetting。

  So,there!’hefinished,withasmilinglydeterminednow-everything-is-just-as-it-was-before’air。

  Billymadenoresponse。Sheturnedhurriedlyandbegantobusyherselfwiththedishesatthesink。Inherheartshewaswondering:couldsheeverforgetwhatBertramhadsaid?Wouldanythingeverblotoutthoseawfulwords:Ifyouwouldtendtoyourhusbandandyourhomealittlemore,andgogallivantingoffwithCalderwellandArkwrightandAliceGreggoryalittleless——’?Itseemednowthatalways,forevermore,theywouldringinherears;always,forevermore,theywouldburndeeperanddeeperintohersoul。Andnotonce,inallBertram’sapologies,hadhereferredtothem——thosewordshehaduttered。Hehadnotsaidhedidnotmeanthem。Hehadnotsaidhewassorryhespokethem。Hehadignoredthem;andheexpectedthatnowshe,too,wouldignorethem。Asifshecould!’Ifyouwouldtendtoyourhusbandandyourhomealittlemore,andgogallivantingoffwithCalderwellandArkwrightandAliceGreggoryalittleless——’Oh,ifonlyshecould,indeed,——forget!

  WhenBillywentup-stairsthatnightsheranacrossherTalktoYoungWives’inherdesk。

  Withahalf-stifledcryshethrustitfarbackoutofsight。

  Ihateyou,Ihateyou——withallyouroldtalkabout`brushingupagainstoutsideinterests’!’

  shewhisperedfiercely。Well,I’ve`brushed’——andnowseewhatI’vegotforit!’

  Later,however,afterBertramwasasleep,Billycreptoutofbedandgotthebook。Underthecarefullyshadedlampintheadjoiningroomsheturnedthepagessoftlytillshecametothesentence:

  Perhapsitwouldbehardtofindamoreutterlyunreasonable,irritable,irresponsiblecreaturethanahungryman。’Withalongsighshebegantoread;andnotuntilsomeminuteslaterdidsheclosethebook,turnoffthelight,andstealbacktobed。

  Duringthenextthreedays,untilafterthefuneralattheshabbylittleSouthBostonhouse,ElizaspentonlyabouthalfofeachdayattheStrata。This,muchtoherdistress,leftmanyofthehouseholdtasksforheryoungmistresstoperform。Billy,however,attackedeachnewdutywithafeverisheagernessthatseemedtomaketheperformanceofitverylikesomegladpenancedoneforpastmisdeeds。Andwhen——onthedayaftertheyhadlaidtheoldservantinhislastrestingplace——adespairingmessagecamefromElizatotheeffectthatnowhermotherwasveryill,andwouldneedhercare,BillypromptlytoldElizatostayaslongaswasnecessary;thattheycouldgetalongallrightwithouther。

  But,Billy,what_are_wegoingtodo?’

  Bertramdemanded,whenheheardthenews。Wemusthavesomebody!’

  _I’m_goingtodoit。’

  Nonsense!Asifyoucould!’scoffedBertram。

  Billyliftedherchin。

  Couldn’tI,indeed,’sheretorted。Doyourealize,youngman,howmuchI’vedonethelastthreedays?Howaboutthosemuffinsyouhadthismorningforbreakfast,andthatcakelastnight?Anddidn’tyouyourselfsaythatyouneverateabetterpuddingthanthatdatepuffyesterdaynoon?’

  Bertramlaughedandshruggedhisshoulders。

  Mydearlove,I’mnotquestioningyour_ability_todoit,’hesoothedquickly。Still,’headded,withawhimsicalsmile,ImustremindyouthatElizahasbeenherehalfthetime,andthatmuffinsanddatepuffs,howeverdelicious,aren’tallthereistorunningabighouselikethis。

  Besides,justbesensible,Billy,’hewentonmoreseriously,ashenotedtherebelliousgleamcomingintohisyoungwife’seyes;you’dknowyoucouldn’tdoit,ifyou’djuststoptothink。There’stheCarletonscomingtodinnerMonday,andmystudioTeato-morrow,tosaynothingoftheSymphonyandtheopera,andtheconcertsyou’dlosebecauseyouweretoodeadtiredtogotothem。

  YouknowhowitwaswiththatconcertyesterdayafternoonwhichAliceGreggorywantedyoutogotowithher。’

  Ididn’t——want——togo,’chokedBilly,underherbreath。

  Andthere’syourmusic。Youhaven’tdoneathingwiththatfordays,yetonlylastweekyoutoldmethepublisherswerehurryingyouforthatlastsongtocompletethegroup。’

  Ihaven’tfeltlike——writing,’stammeredBilly,stillhalfunderherbreath。

  Ofcourseyouhaven’t,’triumphedBertram。

  You’vebeentoodeadtired。Andthat’sjustwhatIsay。Billy,you_can’t_doitallyourself!’

  ButIwantto。Iwantto——totendtothings,’falteredBilly,withahalf-fearfulglanceintoherhusband’sface。

  BillywashearingveryloudlynowthataccusingIfyou’dtendtoyourhusbandandyourhomealittlemore——’Bertram,however,wasnothearingit,evidently。Indeed,heseemednevertohaveheardit——muchlesstohavespokenit。

  `Tendtothings,’’helaughedlightly。

  Well,you’llhaveenoughtodototendtothemaid,Ifancy。Anyhow,we’regoingtohaveone。

  I’lljuststepintooneofthose——whatdoyoucall’em?——intelligenceofficesonmywaydownandsendoneup,’hefinished,ashegavehiswifeagood-bykiss。

  AnhourlaterBilly,strugglingwiththebroomandthedrawing-roomcarpet,wascalledtothetelephone。Itwasherhusband’svoicethatcametoher。

  Billy,forheaven’ssake,takepityonme。

  Won’tyouputonyourdudsandcomeandengageyourmaidyourself?’

  Why,Bertram,what’sthematter?’

  Matter?Holysmoke!Well,I’vebeentothreeofthoseintelligenceoffices——thoughwhytheycallthemthatIcan’timagine。Ifevertherewasaplaceutterlydevoidofintelligence-butnevermind!I’veinterviewedfourfatladies,twothinones,andonemediumwithawart。I’vecheerfullydivulgedallourfamilysecrets,promisedeveryotherhalf-hourout,andtakenoaththatourhouseholdnumbersthreeadultmembers,andnomore;butIsimply_can’t_rememberhowmanyhandkerchiefswehaveinthewasheachweek。Billy,willyoucome?Maybeyoucandosomethingwiththem。I’msureyoucan!’

  Why,ofcourseI’llcome,’chirpedBilly。

  WhereshallImeetyou?’

  Bertramgavethestreetandnumber。

  Good!I’llbethere,’promisedBilly,asshehungupthereceiver。

  Quiteforgettingthebroominthemiddleofthedrawing-roomfloor,Billytrippedup-stairstochangeherdress。Onherlipswasagaylittlesong。Inherheartwasjoy。

  Iratherguess_now_I’mtendingtomyhusbandandmyhome!’shewascrowingtoherself

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