saidmyfathertomeonthefifteenthday。’Ifitshouldbeinvainonthemorrow,thenIshallsellmycross,thatyou,Louis,maynotneedtobehungryanymore,andthenmayGodhavemercyuponus!’Sowewentthenextdaytothegalleryagain。Myfatherwasto-daypalerthanbefore,butheheldhisheaderect;hefixedhiseye,fullofanexpressionofdefianceandscorn,uponthetalkative,laughinggentlemenaroundhim,whostruttedintheirrichclothes,andoverlookedthepoorchevalierwhostoodnearthem,despisedandalone。Inmypoorboy’shearttherewasafearfulrageagainsttheseproud,superciliousmen,whothoughtthemselvessograndbecausetheyworebetterclothes,andbecausetheyhaddistinguishedacquaintancesandrelations,andyetwerenomorethanmyfather——nomorethansuppliantsandpetitioners;tearsofangerandofgrieffilledmyeyes,andthedepthofourpovertyexasperatedmysoulagainsttheinjusticeoffate。Allatoncethewhisperingandtalkingceased,——thekingandthequeenhadenteredthegallery。Thekingadvancedtothemiddleofthehall,thegrandalmonercalledthenames,andthefavoredonesapproachedtheking,toreceivefromhimthefulfilmentoftheirwishes,oratleastkeeptheirhopealive。Nearhimstoodtheyoungqueen,andwhileshewasconvergingwithsomegentlemenofthecourt,herbeautifuleyesglancedovertous,andlingereduponthenoblebutsadformofmyfather。Ihadnoticedthatonpreviousdays,andeverytimeitseemedtomeasifarayfromthesunhadwarmedmypoortremblingheart——asifnewblossomsofhopewereputtingforthinmysoul。To-daythissensation,whenthequeenlookedatus,wasmoreintensethanbefore。Myfatherlookedatthekingandwhisperedsoftly,’Iseehimto-dayforthelasttime!’ButIsawonlythequeen,andwhileI
pressedthecold,moisthandofmyfathertomylips,Iwhispered,’Courage,dearfather,courage!Thequeenhasseenus。’Shestoppedshortinherconversationwiththegentlemanandadvancedthroughthehallwithaquick,lightstepdirectlytous;herlargegray-
blueeyesbeamedwithkindness,aheavenlysmileplayedaroundherrosylips,hercheekswereflushedwithfeeling;shewassimplydressed,andyettherefloatedaroundheranatmosphereofgraceandnobleness。’Mydearchevalier,’saidshe,andhervoiceranglikethesweetestmusic,’mydearchevalier,haveyougivenapetitiontotheking?’’Yes,madame,’answeredmyfathertrembling,’fourteendaysagoIpresentedapetitiontotheking。’’Andhaveyoureceivednoansweryet?’sheaskedquickly。’Iseeyoueverydayherewiththeladthere,andconcludeyouarestillhopingforananswer。’’Soitis,madame,’answeredmyfather,’Iexpectananswer,thatisI
expectadecisioninvolvingmylifeordeath。’’Poorman!’saidthequeen,withatoneofdeepsympathy。’Fourteendaysofsuchwaitingmustbedreadful!Ipityyousincerely。Haveyounoonetopresentyourclaims?’’Madame,’answeredmyfather,’Ihavenooneelsetopresentmyclaimsthanthisemptysleevewhichlacksarightarm——nootherprotectionthanthejusticeofmycause。’’Poorman!’sighedthequeen,’youmustknowtheworldverylittleifyoubelievethatthisisenough。But,ifyouallowme,Iwillundertakeyourprotection,andbeyourintercessorwiththeking。Tellmeyournameandaddress。’Myfathergavethem,thequeenlistenedattentivelyandsmiledinfriendlyfashion。’Behereto-morrowatthishour——I
myselfwillbringyoutheking’sanswer。’Weleftthepalacewithnewcourage,withnewhope。Wefeltnolongerthatweweretiredandhungry,andheedednotthecomplaintsofourhost,whodeclaredthathehadnomorepatience,andthathewouldnolongergiveuscreditforthemiserablechamberwhichwehad。Hisscoldingandthreateningtroubledusthatdaynomore。Webeggedhimtohavepatiencewithustillto-morrow。Wetoldhimourhopesforthefuture,andwerejoicedinourowncheerfulexpectations。Atlengththenextdayarrived,thehouroftheaudiencecame,andwerepairedtothegreatgallery。MyheartbeatsoviolentlythatIcouldfeelituponmylips,andmyfather’sfacewaslightedupwithaglowofhope;hiseyehaditsoldfire,hiswholebeingwasfilledwithnewlife,hiscarriageerectasinourhappydays。Atlastthedoorsopenedandtheroyalcoupleentered。’Prayforme,myson,’myfatherwhispered——’prayformethatmyhopesbenotdisappointed,elseI
shallfalldeadtotheearth。’ButIcouldnotpray,Icouldnotthink。Icouldonlygazeatthebeautifulyoungqueen,whoseemedtomyeyesasifbeaminginagoldencloudsurroundedbyallthestarsofheaven。Theeyesofthequeendartedinquiringlythroughthehall;atlastshecaughtmineandsmiled。Ohthatsmile!itshotlikearayofsunlightthroughmysoul,itfilledmywholebeingwithrapture。Isankuponmyknee,foldedmyhands,andnowIcouldthink,couldpray:’Ablessinguponthequeen!shecomestosavemydearfather’slife,forshefreesusfromoursufferings。’Thequeenapproached,sobeautiful,solovely,withsuchabeamingeye。Sheheldasealedpaperinherhandandgaveittomyfatherwithagentleinclinationofherhead。’Here,sir,’shesaid,’thekingishappytobeabletoreward,inthenameofFrance,oneofhisbestofficers。Thekinggrantsyouayearlypensionofthreehundredlouis-d’or,andIwishforyouandyoursonthatyoumayliveyetmanyyearstoenjoyhappinessandhealth。Goatoncewiththispapertothetreasury,andyouwillreceivethefirstquarterlypayment。’
Then,whenshesawthatmyfatherwasalmostswooning,shesummonedwithaloudvoicesomegentlemenofthecourt,andcommandedthemtotakecareofmyfather;totakehimoutintothefreshair,andtoarrangethathebesenthomeinacarriage。Nowallthesefinegentlemenwerebusyinhelpingus。Everyoneviedwiththeothersinbeingfriendlytous;andthepoorneglectedinvalidwhohadbeencrowdedtothewall,theoverlookedofficerToulan,wasnowanobjectofuniversalcareandattention。Werodehometoourinninaroyalcarriage,andthehostdidnotgrumbleanylonger;hewasanxioustoprocureusfood,andveryactiveincaringforallourneeds。Thequeenhadsavedusfrommisfortune,thequeenhadmadeushappyandwelltodo。“
“Ablessinguponthedearheadofourqueen!“criedMargaret,raisingherfoldedhandstoheaven。“NowIshalldoublyloveher,forsheisthebenefactorofhimIlove。Oh,whyhaveyouwaiteduntilnowbeforetellingmethisbeautiful,touchingstory?WhyhaveInotenjoyeditbefore?ButIthankyoufrommyheartforthegoodwhichithasdoneme。“
“Mydearone,“answeredToulan,gravely,“thereareexperiencesinthehumansoulthatonemayrevealonlyinthemostmomentousepochsoflife——justasintheJewishtempletheHolyofHolieswasrevealedonlyonthechieffeast-days。Suchatime,mydearone,isto-day,andIwithdrawallveilsfrommyheart,andletyouseeandknowwhat,besidesyou,onlyGodseesandknows。SincethatdaywhenIreturnedwithmyfatherfromthepalace,andwhenthequeenhadmadeushappyagain——sincethatdaymywholesoulhasbelongedtothequeen。Ithankedherforall,forthecontentmentofmyfather,foreverycheerfulhourwhichwespenttogether;andalltheknowledgeIhavegained,allthestudiesIhaveattempted,Iowetothebeautiful,nobleMarieAntoinette。Wewenttoourhome,andI
enteredthehigh-schoolinordertofitmyselftobeamerchant,abookseller。Myfatherhadenjoineduponmeriottochooseasoldier’slot。Thesadexperienceofhisinvalidlifehungoverhimlikeadarkcloud,andhedidnotwishthatIshouldeverenterintothesame。’Beanindependent,freeman,’saidhetome。’Learntodependonyourownstrengthandyourownwillalone。Usethepowersofyourmind,becomeasoldieroflabor,andsoserveyourcountry。
Iknow,indeed,thatifthehourofdangerevercomes,youwillbeatrue,boldsoldierforyourqueen,andfightforhertillyourlastbreath。’Ihadtopromisehimonhisdeath-bedthatIwouldsodo。
Eventhenhesawthedarkanddangerousdaysapproach,whichhavenowbrokenupontherealm——eventhenheheardthemutteringofthetempestwhichnowsoinevitablyisapproaching;andoftenwhenI
wenthometohissilentchamberIfoundhimreading,withtearsinhiseyes,thepamphletsandjournalswhichhadcomefromParistousatRouen,andwhichseemedtouslikethestorm-birdsannouncingthetempest。’Thequeenissogood,soinnocent,’hewouldsigh,’andtheymakehergoodnessacrimeandherinnocencetheymakeguilt!
Sheislikealamb,surroundedbytigers,thatplaysthoughtlesslywiththeflowers,anddoesnotknowthepoisonthatlurksbeneaththem。Sweartome,Louis,thatyouwillseek,ifGodgivesyouthepower,tofreethelambfromthebloodthirstytigers。Sweartomethatyourwholelifeshallbedevotedtoherservice。’AndIdidswearit,Margaret,notmerelytomydearfather,buttomyselfaswell。EverydayIhaverepeated,’ToQueenMarieAntoinettebelongsmylife,foreverythingthatmakeslifevaluableIowetoher。’
“Whenmyfatherdied,IleftRouenandremovedtoParis,theretopursuemybusinessasabookseller。Mysuspicionstoldmethatthetimewouldsooncomewhenthefriendsofthequeenmustrallyaroundher,andmustperhapsputamaskovertheirfaces,inordertosustainthemselvesuntilthedaysofrealdanger。Thattimehasnowcome,Margaret;thequeenisindanger!Thetigershavesurroundedthelamb,anditcannotescape。Enemieseverywhere,whereveryoulook!——enemieseveninthepalaceitself。TheCountdeProvence,herownbrother-in-law,hasforyearspersecutedherwithhisepigrams,becausehecannotforgiveitinherthatthekingpaysmoreattentiontohercounselsthanhedoestothoseofhisbrother,whohatestheAustrian。TheCountd’Artois,formerlytheonlyfriendofMarieAntoinetteintheroyalfamily,desertedherwhenthequeentookgroundagainsttheviewoftheking’sbrothersinfavorofthedoublerepresentationoftheThirdEstate,andpersuadedherhusbandtocomplywiththewishesofthenationandcalltogethertheStates-General。Hehasgoneovertothecampofherenemies,andragesagainstthequeen,becausesheisinclinedtofavorthewishesofthepeople。Andyetthisverypeopleisturnedagainsther,doesnotbelieveinthelove,butonlyinthehateofthequeen,andallpartiesareagreedinkeepingthepeopleinthisfaith。TheDuked’Orleansrevengeshimselfupontheinnocentandpurequeenforthescornwhichshedisplaystothisinfamousprince。Theauntsofthequeenrevengethemselvesfortheobscurepositiontowhichfatehasconsignedthem,theyhavingtoplaythesecondpartatthebrilliantcourtofVersailles,andbethrownintotheshadebyMarieAntoinette。Thewholecourt——allthesejealous,enviousladies——
revengethemselvesforthefavorwhichthequeenhasshowntothePolignacs。Theyhaveunderminedhergoodname;theyhavefoughtagainstherwiththepoisonedarrowsofdenunciation,calumny,pamphlets,andlibels。Everythingbadthathashappenedhasbeenascribedtoher。Shehasbeenheldresponsibleforeveryevilthathashappenedtothenation。
Thequeenisaccountableforthefinancialtroublesthathavebrokenoverus,andsincetheministryhavedeclaredthestatebankrupt,ParisianscallthequeenMadameDeficit。Cursesfollowherwhenshedrivesout,andevenwhensheentersthetheatre。EveninherowngardensofSt。CloudandTrianonmendaretoinsultthequeenasshepassesby。InalltheclubsofParistheythunderatthequeen,andcallherthedestructionofPrance。ThedownfallofMarieAntoinetteisresolveduponbyherenemies,andthetimehascomewhenherfriendsmustbeactiveforher。ThetimehascomeformetopaythevowwhichImadetomydyingfatherandtomyself。Godhasblessedmyeffortsandcrownedmyindustryandactivitywithsuccess。Ihavereachedanindependentposition。Theconfidenceofmyfellow-
citizenshasmademeacouncillor。Ihaveacceptedtheposition,notoutofvanityorambition,butbecauseitwillgivemeopportunitytoservethequeen。Iwearamaskbeforemyface。Ibelongtothedemocratsandagitators。Iappeartotheworldasanenemyofthequeen,inordertobeabletodohersomesecretserviceasafriend;forIsaytoyou,andrepeatitbeforeGod,tothequeenbelongmywholelife,mywholebeing,andthought。Iloveyou,Margaret!Everythingwhichcanmakemylifehappywillcomefromyou,andyetIshallbereadyeveryhourtoleaveyou——toseemyhappinessgotoruinwithoutacomplaint,withoutasigh,ifIcanbeofservicetothequeen。Youmyheartloves;hermysouladores。
WhereverIshallbe,Margaret,ifthecallofthequeencomestome,Ishallfollowit,evenifIknowthatdeathlurksatthedoorbehindwhichthequeenawaitsme。Westandbeforeadarkandtempestuoustime,andourcountryistobetornwithfearfulstrife。