Racingspecial!
Dublin。Ihavemuch,muchtolearn。
TheyturnedtotheleftalongAbbeystreet。
Ihaveavisiontoo,Stephensaid。
Yes,theprofessorsaid,skippingtogetintostep。Crawfordwillfollow。
Anothernewsboyshotpastthem,yellingasheran:
Racingspecial!DearDirtyDublinDubliners。
TwoDublinvestals,Stephensaid,elderlyandpious,havelivedfiftyandfiftythreeyearsinFumbally’slane。
Whereisthat?theprofessorasked。
OffBlackpitts。
Dampnightreekingofhungrydough。Againstthewall。Faceglisteningtallowunderherfustianshawl。Frantichearts。Akasicrecords。Quicker,darlint!
Onnow。Dareit。Lettherebelife。
TheywanttoseetheviewsofDublinfromthetopofNelson’spillar。
Theysaveupthreeandtenpenceinaredtinletterboxmoneybox。Theyshakeoutthethreepennybitsandasixpenceandcoaxoutthepennieswiththebladeofaknife。Twoandthreeinsilverandoneandsevenincoppers。
Theyputontheirbonnetsandbestclothesandtaketheirumbrellasforfearitmaycomeontorain。
Wisevirgins,professorMacHughsaid。LifeontheRawTheybuyoneandfourpenceworthofbrawnandfourslicesofpanloafatthenorthcitydiningroomsinMarlboroughstreetfromMissKateCollins,proprietress……Theypurchase-ourandtwentyripeplumsfromagirlatthefootofNelson’spillartotakeoffthethirstofthebrawn。Theygivetwothreepennybitstothegentlemanattheturnstileandbegintowaddleslowlyupthewindingstaircase,grunting,encouragingeachother,afraidofthedark,panting,oneaskingtheotherhaveyouthebrawn,praisingGodandtheBlessedVirgin,threateningtocomedown,peepingattheairslits。
GlorybetoGod。Theyhadnoideaitwasthathigh。
TheirnamesareAnneKearnsandFlorenceMacCabe。AnneKearnshasthelumbagoforwhichsherubsonLourdeswatergivenherbyaladywhogotabottlefulfromapassionistfather。FlorenceMacCabetakesacrubeenandabottleofdoubleXforsuppereverySaturday。
Antithesis,theprofessorsaid,noddingtwice。Vestalvirgins。I
canseethem。What’skeepingourfriend?
Heturned。
Abevyofscamperingnewsboysrusheddownthesteps,scamperinginalldirections,yelling,theirwhitepapersfluttering。HardafterthemMylesCrawfordappearedonthesteps,hishataureolinghisscarletface,talkingwithJ。J。O’Molloy。
Comealong,theprofessorcried,wavinghisarm。
HesetoffagaintowalkbyStephen’sside。ReturnofBloomYes,hesaid。Iseethem。
MrBloom,breathless,caughtinawhirlofwildnewsboysneartheofficesoftheIrishCatholicandDublinPennyJournal,called:
MrCrawford!Amoment!
Telegraph!Racingspecial!
Whatisit?MylesCrawfordsaid,fallingbackapace。AnewsboycriedinMrBloom’sface:
TerribletragedyinRathmines!Achildbitbyabellows!InterviewwiththeEditorJustthisad,MrBloomsaid,pushingthroughtowardsthesteps,puffing,andtakingthecuttingfromhispocket。IspokewithMrKeyesjustnow。
He’llgivearenewalfortwomonths,hesays。Afterhe’llsee。ButhewantsapartocallattentionintheTelegraphtoo,theSaturdaypink。
Andhewantsitifit’snottoolateItoldcouncillorNannettifromtheKilkennyPeople。Icanhaveaccesstoitinthenationallibrary。
Houseofkeys,don’tyousee?HisnameisKeyes。It’saplayonthename。
Buthepracticallypromisedhe’dgivetherenewal。Buthewantsjustalittlepuff。WhatwillItellhim,MrCrawford?K。M。A。Willyoutellhimhecankissmyarse?MylesCrawfordsaid,throwingouthisarmforemphasis。Tellhimthatstraightfromthestable。
Abitnervy。Lookoutforsqualls。Alloffforadrink。Arminarm。
Lenehan’syachtingcaponthecadgebeyond。Usualblarney。WonderisthatyoungDedalusthemovingspirit。Hasagoodpairofbootsonhimtoday。
LasttimeIsawhimhehadhisheelsonview。Beenwalkinginmucksomewhere。
Carelesschap。WhatwashedoinginIrishtown?
Well,MrBloomsaid,hiseyesreturning,ifIcangetthedesignIsupposeit’sworthashortpar。He’dgivetheadIthink。I’lltellhim……
HecankissmyroyalIrisharse,MylesCrawfordcriedloudlyoverhisshoulder。Anytimehelikes,tellhim。
WhileMrBloomstoodweighingthepointandabouttosmilehestrodeonjerkily。RaisingtheWindNullabona,Jack,hesaid,raisinghishandtohischin。I’muptohere。I’vebeenthroughthehoopmyself。Iwaslookingforafellowtobackabillformenolaterthanlastweek。Youmusttakethewillforthedeed。Sorry,Jack。WithaheartandahalfifIcouldraisethewindanyhow。
J。J。O’Molloypulledalongfaceandwalkedonsilently。Theycaughtupontheothersandwalkedabreast。
Whentheyhaveeatenthebrawnandthebreadandwipedtheirtwentyfingersinthepaperthebeardwaswrappedin,theygonearertotherailings。
Somethingforyou,theprofessorexplainedtoMylesCrawford。TwooldDublinwomenonthetopofNelson’spillar。SomeColumn!-That’sWhatWaddlerOneSaidThat’snew,MylesCrawfordsaid。That’scopy。Outforthewaxies’Dargle。
Twooldtrickies,what?
Buttheyareafraidthepillarwillfall,Stephenwenton。Theyseetheroofsandargueaboutwherethedifferentchurchesare:Rathmines’
bluedome,AdamandEve’s,saintLaurenceO’Toole’s。Butitmakesthemgiddytolooksotheypulluptheirskirts……ThoseSlightlyRambunctiousFemalesEasyall,MylesCrawfordsaid,nopoeticlicence。We’reinthearchdiocesehere。
Andsettledownontheirstripedpetticoats,peeringupatthestatueoftheonehandledadulterer。
Onehandledadulterer!theprofessorcried。Ilikethat。Iseetheidea。Iseewhatyoumean。DamesDonateDublin’sCitsSpeedpillsVelocitousAeroliths,BeliefItgivesthemacrickintheirnecks,Stephensaid,andtheyaretootiredtolookupordownortospeak。Theyputthebagofplumsbetweenthemandeattheplumsoutofitoneafteranother,wipingoffwiththeirhandkerchiefstheplumjuicethatdribblesoutoftheirmouthsandspittingtheplumstonesslowlyoutbetweentherailings。
Hegaveasuddenloudyounglaughasaclose。LenehanandMrO’MaddenBurke,hearing,turned,beckonedandledonacrosstowardsMooney’s。
Finished?MylesCrawfordsaid。Solongastheydonoworse。SophistWallopsHaughtyHelenSquareonProboscis。SpartansGnashMolars。
IthacansVowPenisChampYouremindmeofAntisthenes,theprofessorsaid,adiscipleofGorgias,thesophist。Itissaidofhimthatnonecouldtellifhewerebittereragainstothersoragainsthimself。Hewasthesonofanobleandabondwoman。
AndhewroteabookinwhichhetookawaythepalmofbeautyfromArgiveHelenandhandedittopoorPenelope。
PoorPenelope。PenelopeRich。
TheymadereadytocrossO’Connellstreet。HelloThere,Central!Atvariouspointsalongtheeightlinestramcarswithmotionlesstrolleysstoodintheirtracks,boundfororfromRathmines,Rathfarnham,Blackrock,KingstownandDalkey,SandymountGreen,RingsendandSandymountTower,Donnybrook,PalmerstonParkandUpperRathmines,allstill,becalmedinshortcircuit。Hackneycars,cabs,deliverywaggons,mail-vans,privatebroughams,aeratedmineralwaterfloatswithrattlingcratesofbottles,rattled,lolled,horsedrawn,rapidly。What?-andLikewise-Where?Butwhatdoyoucallit?MylesCrawfordasked。Wheredidtheygettheplums?Virgilian,SaysPedagogue。SophomorePlumpsforOldManMosesCallit,wait,theprofessorsaid,openinghislonglipswidetoreflect。
Callit,letmesee。Callit:deusnobishcotiafecit。
No,Stephensaid,IcallitAPisgahSightofPalestineortheParableofthePlums。
Isee,theprofessorsaid。
Helaughedrichly。
Isee,hesaidagainwithnewpleasure。Mosesandthepromisedland。
Wegavehimthatidea,headdedtoJ。J。O’Molloy。HoratioisCynosurethisFairJuneDayJ。J。O’Molloysentawearysidelongglancecowardsthestatueandheldhispeace。
Isee,theprofessorsaid。
HehaltedonsirJohnGray’spavementislandandpeeredaloftatNelsonthroughthemeshesofhiswrysmile。DiminishedDigitsProveTooTitillatingforFriskyFrumps。AnneWimbles,FloWangles-YetCanYouBlameThem?Onehandledadulterer,hesaidgrimly。ThatticklesmeImustsay。
Tickledtheoldonestoo,MylesCrawfordsaid,iftheGodAlmighty’struthwasknown。
JOYCE:Ulysses,LestrygoniansLestrygoniansPINEAPPLEROCK,LEMONPLATT,BUTTERSCOTCH。ASUGARSTICKYGIRLshovellingscoopfulsofcreamsforachristianbrother。Someschooltreat。Badfortheirtummies。LozengeandcomfitmanufacturertoHisMajestytheKing。
God。Save。Our。Sittingonhisthrone,suckingredjujubeswhite。
AsombreY。M。C。A。youngman,watchfulamongthewarmsweetfumesofGrahamLemon’s,placedathrowawayinahandofMrBloom。
Hearttohearttalks。
Bloo……Me?No。
BloodoftheLamb。
Hisslowfeetwalkedhimriverward,reading。Areyousaved?Allarewashedinthebloodofthelamb。Godwantsbloodvictim。Birth,hymen,martyr,war,foundationofabuilding,sacrifice,kidneyburntoffering,druid’saltars。Elijahiscoming。DrJohnAlexanderDowie,restorerofthechurchinZion,iscoming。Iscoming!Iscoming!!Iscoming!!!
Allheartilywelcome。Payinggame。TorryandAlexanderlastyear。Polygamy。Hiswifewillputthestopperonthat。WherewasthatadsomeBirminghamfirmtheluminouscrucifix?OurSaviour。Wakeupinthedeadofnightandseehimonthewall,hanging。Pepper’sghostidea。Ironnailsranin。
Phosphorusitmustbedonewith。Ifyouleaveabitofcodfishforinstance。
Icouldseetheblueysilveroverit。NightIwentdowntothepantryinthekitchen。Don’tlikeallthesmellsinitwaitingtorushout。Whatwasitshewanted?TheMalagaraisins。ThinkingofSpain。BeforeRudywasborn。Thephosphorescence,thatblueygreeny。Verygoodforthebrain。
FromButler’smonumenthousecornerheglancedalongBachelor’swalk。
Dedalus’daughtertherestilloutsideDillon’sauctionrooms。Mustbesellingoffsomeoldfurniture。Knewhereyesatoncefromthefather。Lobbingaboutwaitingforhim。Homealwaysbreaksupwhenthemothergoes。Fifteenchildrenhehad。Birtheveryyearalmost。That’sintheirtheologyorthepriestwon’tgivethepoorwomantheconfession,theabsolution。Increaseandmultiply。Didyoueverhearsuchanidea?Eatyououtofhouseandhome。Nofamiliesthemselvestofeed。Livingonthefatoftheland。Theirbutteriesandlarders。I’dliketoseethemdotheblackfastYomKippur。
Crossbuns。Onemealandacollationforfearhe’dcollapseonthealtar。
AhousekeeperofoneofthosefellowsIfyoucouldpickitoutofher。
Neverpickitoutofher。LikegettingL。s。d。outofhim。Doeshimselfwell。Noguests。Allfornumberone。Watchinghiswater。Bringyourownbreadandbutter。Hisreverence。Mum’stheword。
GoodLord,thatpoorchild’sdressisinflitters。Underfedshelookstoo。Potatoesandmarge,margeandpotatoes。It’saftertheyfeelit。Proofofthepudding。Underminestheconstitution。
AshesetfootonO’Connellbridgeapuffballofsmokeplumedupfromtheparapet。Brewerybargewithexportstout。England。Seaairsoursit,Iheard。BeinterestingsomedaygetapassthroughHancocktoseethebrewery。Regularworldinitself。Vatsofporter,wonderful。Ratsgetintoo。Drinkthemselvesbloatedasbigasacolliefloating。Deaddrunkontheporter。Drinktilltheypukeagainlikechristians。Imaginedrinkingthat!Rats:vats。Wellofcourseifweknewallthethings。
Lookingdownhesawflappingstrongly,wheelingbetweenthegauntquaywalls,gulls。Roughweatheroutside。IfIthrewmyselfdown?ReubenJ’ssonmusthaveswallowedagoodbellyfulofthatsewage。Oneandeightpencetoomuch。Hhhhm。It’sthedrollwayhecomesoutwiththethings。Knowshowtotellastorytoo。
Theywheeledlower。Lookingforgrub。Wait。
Hethrewdownamongthemacrumpledpaperball。Elijahthirtytwofeetperseciscom。Notabit。Theballbobbedunheededonthewakeofswells,floatedunderbythebridgepiers。Notsuchdamnfools。AlsothedayI
threwthatstalecakeoutoftheErin’sKingpickeditupinthewakefiftyyardsastern。Livebytheirwits。Theywheeled,flapping。ThehungryfamishedgullFlapso’erthewatersdull。Thatishowpoetswrite,thesimilarsounds。ButthenShakespearehasnorhymes:blankverse。Theflowofthelanguageitis。Thethoughts。Solemn。Hamlet,Iamthyfather’sspiritDoomedforacertaintimetowalktheearth。Twoapplesapenny!Twoforapenny!
Hisgazepassedovertheglazedapplesserriedonherstand。Australianstheymustbethistimeofyear。Shinypeels:polishesthemupwitharagorahandkerchief。