Imperiumromanum，J。J。O’Molloysaidgently。ItsoundsnoblerthanBritishorBrixton。Thewordremindsonesomehowoffatinthefire。
MylesCrawfordblewhisfirstpuffviolentlytowardstheceiling。
That’sit，hesaid。Wearethefat。YouandIarethefatinthefire。Wehaven’tgotthechanceofasnowballinhell。TheGrandeurthatwasRomeWaitamoment，professorMacHughsaid，raisingtwoquietclaws。Wemustn’tbeledawaybywords，bysoundsofwords。WethinkofRome，imperial，imperious，imperative。
Heextendedelocutionaryarmsfromfrayedstainedshirtcuffs，pausing：
Whatwastheircivilisation？Vast，Iallow：butvile。Cloac&；Aelig；：
sewers。TheJewsinthewildernessandonthemountaintopsaid：Itismeettobehere。LetusbuildanaltartoJehovah。TheRoman，liketheEnglishmanwhofollowsinhisfootsteps，broughttoeverynewshoreonwhichhesethisfootonourshoreheneversetitonlyhiscloacalobsession。Hegazedabouthiminhistogaandhesaid：Itismeettobehere。Letusconstructawatercloset。
Whichtheyaccordinglydiddo，Lenehansaid。Ouroldancientancestors，aswereadinthefirstchapterofGuinness’s，werepartialtotherunningstream。
Theywerenature’sgentlemen，J。J。O’Molloymurmured。ButwehavealsoRomanlaw。
AndPontiusPilateisitsprophet，professorMacHughresponded。
DoyouknowthatstoryaboutchiefBaronPalles？J。J。O’Molloyasked。
Itwasattheroyaluniversitydinner。Everythingwasgoingswimmingly。
Firstmyriddle，Lenehansaid。Areyouready？
MrO’MaddenBurke，tallincopiousgreyofDonegaltweed，cameinfromthehallway。StephenDedalus，behindhim，uncoveredasheentered。
Entrez，mesenfants！Lenehancried。
Iescortasuppliant，MrO’MaddenBurkesaidmelodiously。YouthledbyExperiencevisitsNotoriety。
Howdoyoudo？theeditorsaid，holdingoutahand。Comein。Yourgovernorisjustgone。？？？Lenehansaidtoall：
Silence！Whatoperaresemblesarailwayline？Reflect，ponder，excogitate，reply。
Stephenhandedoverthetypedsheets，pointingtothetitleandsignature。
Who？theeditorasked。
Bittornoff。
MrGarrettDeasy，Stephensaid：
Thatoldpelters，theeditorsaid。Whotoreit？Washeshorttaken。OnswiftsailflamingFromstormandsouthHecomes，palevampire，Mouthtomymouth。Goodday，Stephen，theprofessorsaid，comingtopeerovertheirshoulders。
Footandmouth？Areyouturned……？
Bullockbefriendingbard。ShindyinwellknownRestaurantGoodday，sir，Stephenanswered，blushing。Theletterisnotmine。MrGarrettDeasyaskedmeto……
O，Iknowhim，MylesCrawfordsaid，andknewhiswifetoo。ThebloodiestoldtartarGodevermade。ByJesus，shehadthefootandmouthdiseaseandnomistake！Thenightshethrewthesoupinthewaiter’sfaceintheStarandGarter。Oho！
Awomanbroughtsinintotheworld。ForHelen，therunawaywifeofMenelaus，tenyearstheGreeks。O’Rourke，princeofBreffni。
Isheawidower？Stephenasked。
Ay，agrassone，MylesCrawfordsaid，hiseyerunningdownthetypescript。
Emperor’shorses。Habsburg。AnIrishmansavedhislifeontherampartsofVienna。Don’tyouforget！MaximilianKarlO’Donnell，grafvonTirconnelinIreland。SenthisheirovertomakethekinganAustrianfieldmarshalnow。Goingtobetroublethereoneday。Wildgeese。Oyes，everytime。
Don’tyouforgetthat！
Themootpointisdidheforgetit？J。J。O’Molloysaidquietly，turningahorseshoepaperweight。Savingprincesisathankyoujob。
ProfessorMacHughturnedonhim。
Andifnot？hesaid。
I’lltellyouhowitwas，MylesCrawfordbegan。Hungarianitwasoneday……LostCausesNobleMarquessmentionedWewerealwaysloyaltolostcauses，theprofessorsaid。Successforusisthedeathoftheintellectandoftheimagination。Wewereneverloyaltothesuccessful。Weservethem。IteachtheblatantLatinlanguage。I
speakthetongueofaracetheacmeofwhosementalityisthemaxim：timeismoney。Materialdomination。Dominus！Lord！Whereisthespirituality？
LordJesus！LordSalisbury。Asofainawestendclub。ButtheGreek！KyrieEleison！Asmileoflightbrightenedhisdarkrimmedeyes，lengthenedhislonglips。
TheGreek！hesaidagain。Kyrios！Shiningword！ThevowelstheSemiteandtheSaxonknownot。Kyrie！Theradianceoftheintellect。
IoughttoprofessGreek，thelanguageofthemind。Kyrieeleison！Theclosetmakerandthecloacamakerwillneverbelordsofourspirit。
WeareliegesubjectsofthecatholicchivalryofEuropethatfounderedatTrafalgarandoftheempireofthespirit，notanimperium，thatwentunderwiththeAthenianfleetsat&；Aelig；gospotami。Yes，yes。
Theywentunder。Pyrrhus，misledbyanoracle，madealastattempttoretrievethefortunesofGreece。Loyaltoalostcause。
Hestrodeawayfromthemtowardsthewindow。
Theywentforthtobattle，MrO’MaddenBurkesaidgreyly，buttheyalwaysfell。
Boohoo！Lenehanweptwithalittlenoise。Owingtoabrickreceivedinthelatterhalfofthematiné；e。Poor，poor，poorPyrrhus！
HewhisperedthennearStephen’sear：Lenehan’sLimerickThere’saponderouspunditMacHughWhowearsgogglesofebonyhue。
AshemostlyseesdoubleTowearthemwhytrouble？
Ican’tseetheJoeMiller。Canyou？InmourningforSallust，Mulligansays。Whosemotherisbeastlydead。
MylesCrawfordcrammedthesheetsintoasidepocket。
That’llbeallright，hesaid。I’llreadtherestafter。That’llbeallright。
Lenehanextendedhishandsinprotest。
Butmyriddle！hesaid。Whatoperaislikearailwayline？
Opera？MrO’MaddenBurke’ssphinxfacereriddled。
Lenehanannouncedgladly：
TheRoseofCastille。Seethewheeze？Rowsofcaststeel。
Gee！
HepokedMrO’MaddenBurkemildlyinthespleen。MrO’MaddenBurkefellbackwithgraceonhisumbrella，feigningagasp。
Help！hesighed。Ifeelastrongweakness。
Lenehan，risingtotiptoe，fannedhisfacerapidlywiththerustlingtissues。
Theprofessor，returningbywayofthefiles，swepthishandacrossStephen’sandMrO’MaddenBurke’slooseties。
Paris，pastandpresent，hesaid。Youlooklikecommunards。
Likefellowswhohadblownupthebastille，J。J。O’Molloysaidinquietmockery。OrwasityoushotthelordlieutenantofFinlandbetweenyou？Youlookasthoughyouhaddonethedeed。GeneralBobrikoff。OmniumGatherumWewereonlythinkingaboutit，Stephensaid。
Allthetalents，MylesCrawfordsaid。Law，theclassics。
Theturf，Lenehanputin。
Literature，thepress。
IfBloomwerehere，theprofessorsaid。Thegentleartofadvertisement。
AndMadamBloom，MrO’MaddenBurkeadded。Thevocalmuse。Dublin’sprimefavourite。
Lenehangavealoudcough。
Ahem！hesaidverysoftly。O，forafreshofbreathair！Icaughtacoldinthepark。Thegatewasopen。Youcandoit！TheeditorlaidanervoushandonStephen’sshoulder。
Iwantyoutowritesomethingforme，hesaid。Somethingwithabiteinit。Youcandoit。Iseeitinyourface。Inthelexiconofyouth……
Seeitinyourface。Seeitinyoureye。Lazyidlelittleschemer。
Footandmouthdisease！theeditorcriedinscornfulinvective。GreatnationalistmeetinginBorris-in-Ossory。Allballs！Bulldosingthepublic！
Givethemsomethingwithabiteinit。Putusallintoit，damnitssoul。
FatherSonandHolyGhostandfakesM’Carthy。
Wecanallsupplymentalpabulum，MrO’MaddenBurkesaid。
Stephenraisedhiseyestotheboldunheedingstare。
Hewantsyouforthepressgang，J。J。O’Molloysaid。TheGreatGallaherYoucandoit，MylesCrawfordrepeated，clenchinghishandinemphasis。
Waitaminute。We’llparalyseEuropeasIgnatiusGallaherusedtosaywhenhewasontheshaughraun，doingbilliardmarkingintheClarence。Gallaher，thatwasapressmanforyou。Thatwasapen。Youknowhowhemadehismark？
I’lltellyou。Thatwasthesmartestpieceofjournalismeverknown。Thatwasineightyone，sixthofMay，timeoftheinvincibles，murderinthePhoenixpark，beforeyouwereborn，Isuppose。I’llshowyou。
Hepushedpastthemtothefiles。
Lookathere，hesaid，turning。TheNewYorkWorldcabledforaspecial。Rememberthattime？
ProfessorMacHughnodded。
NewYorkWorld，theeditorsaid，excitedlypushingbackhisstrawhat。Whereittookplace。TimKelly，orKavanaghImean，JoeBradyandtherestofthem。WhereSkin-the-goatdrovethecar。Wholeroute，see？
Skin-the-goat，MrO’MaddenBurkesaid。Fitzharris。Hehasthatcabman’sshelter，theysay，downthereatButtbridge。Holohantoldme。YouknowHolohan？
Hopandcarryone，isit？MylesCrawfordsaid。
AndpoorGumleyisdowntheretoo，sohetoldme，mindingstonesforthecorporation。Anightwatchman。
Stephenturnedinsurprise。
Gumley？hesaid。Youdon’tsayso？Afriendofmyfather’s，ishe？
NevermindGumley，MylesCrawfordcriedangrily。LetGumleymindthestones，seetheydon’trunaway。Lookathere。WhatdidIgnatiusGallaherdo？I’lltellyou。Inspirationofgenius。Cabledrightaway。HaveyouWeeklyFreemanof17March？Right。Haveyougotthat？
Heflungbackpagesofthefilesandstuckhisfingeronapoint。
Takepagefour，advertisementforBransome’scoffeeletussay。Haveyougotthat？Right。
Thetelephonewhirred。AdistantvoiceI’llanswerit，theprofessorsaidgoing。
Bisparkgate。Good。
Hisfingerleapedandstruckpointafterpoint，vibrating。
Tisviceregallodge。Ciswheremurdertookplace。KisKnockmaroongate。
Theloosefleshofhisneckshooklikeacock’swattles。Anillstarcheddickyjuttedupandwitharudegesturehethrustitbackintohiswaistcoat。
Hello？EveningTelegraphhere……Hello？……Who’sthere？……
Yes……Yes……
FtoPistherouteSkin-the-goatdrovethecarforanalibi。Inchicore，Roundtown，WindyArbour，PalmerstonPark，Ranelagh。F。A。B。P。Gotthat？
XisDavy’spublichouseinupperLeesonstreet。
Theprofessorcametotheinnerdoor。
Bloomisatthetelephone，hesaid。
Tellhimgotohell，theeditorsaidpromptly。XisBurke’spublichouse，see？Clever，VeryClever，Lenehansaid。Very。
Gaveittothemonahotplate，MylesCrawfordsaid，thewholebloodyhistory。
Nightmarefromwhichyouwillneverawake。
Isawit，theeditorsaidproudly。Iwaspresent，DickAdams，thebestheartedbloodyCorkmantheLordeverputthebreathoflifein，andmyself。
Lenehanbowedtoashapeofair，announcing：
Madam，I’mAdam。AndAblewasIereIsawElba。
History！MylesCrawfordcried。TheOldWomanofPrince’sstreetwastherefirst。Therewasweepingandgnashingofteethoverthat。Outofanadvertisement。GregorGreymadethedesignforit。Thatgavehimthelegup。ThenPaddyHooperworkedTayPaywhotookhimontotheStar。
Nowhe’sgotinwithBlumenfeld。That’spress。That’stalent。Pyatt！Hewasalltheirdaddies。
Thefatherofscarejournalism，Lenehanconfirmed，andthebrother-in-lawofChrisCallinan。
Hello？……Areyouthere？……Yes，he’sherestill。Comeacrossyourself。
Wheredoyoufindapressmanlikethatnow，eh？theeditorcried。
Heflungthepagesdown。
Clamndever，LenehansaidtoMrO’MaddenBurke。
Verysmart，MrO’MaddenBurkesaid。
ProfessorMacHughcamefromtheinneroffice。
Talkingabouttheinvincibles，hesaid，didyouseethatsomehawkerswereupbeforetherecorder