Itwasstillfulllightwhentheyrosefromthetable,anditwasscarcelytwilightwhenJeffheardCynthialettingherselfoutatthebackdoor。Hefanciedhergoingdowntoherfather’shouse,andhewentouttothecornerofthehoteltomeether。Shefalteredamomentatsightofhim,andthenkeptonwithavertedface。
Hejoinedher,andwalkedbesideher。\"Well,Cynthy,whatareyougoingtosaytome?I’moffforCambridgeagainto—morrowmorning,andI
supposewe’vegottounderstandeachother。Icameupheretoputmyselfinyourhands,tokeeportothrowaway,justasyouplease。Well?Haveyouthoughtaboutit?\"
\"Everyminute,\"saidthegirl,quietly。
\"Well?\"
\"Ifyouhadcaredforme,itcouldn’thavehappened。\"
\"Ohyes,itcould。Nowthat’sjustwhereyou’remistaken。That’swhereawomannevercanunderstandaman。Imightcarryonwithhalfadozengirls,andyetneverforgetyou,orthinklessofyou,althoughIcouldseeallthetimehowprettyandbrighteveryoneof’emwas。That’sthewayaman’smindisbuilt。It’scurious,butit’strue。\"
\"Idon’tbelieveIcareforanyshareinyourmind,then,\"saidthegirl。
\"Oh,come,now!Youdon’tmeanthat。YouknowIwasjustjoking;youknowIdon’tjustifywhatI’vedone,andIdon’texcuseit。ButIthinkI’veactedprettysquarewithyouaboutit——abouttellingyou,Imean。
Idon’twanttolayanyclaim,butyourememberwhenyoumademepromisethatiftherewasanythingshadyIwantedtohidefromyou——Well,Iactedonthat。Youdoremember?\"
\"Yes,\"saidCynthia,andshepulledthecloudoverthesideofherfacenexttohim,andwalkedalittlefaster。
Hehastenedhisstepstokeepupwithher。\"Cynthy,ifyouputyourarmsroundme,asyoudidthen——\"
\"Ican’tJeff!\"
\"Youdon’twantto。\"
\"Yes,Ido!Butyoudon’twantmeto,asyoudidthen。Doyou?\"Shestoppedabruptlyandfacedhimfull。\"Tellme,honestly!\"
Jeffdroppedhisboldeyes,andthesmilelefthishandsomemouth。
\"Youdon’t,\"saidthegirl,\"foryouknowthatifyoudid,Iwoulddoit。\"Shebegantowalkonagain。\"Itwouldn’tbehardformetoforgiveyouanythingyou’vedoneagainstme——oragainstyourself;Ishouldcareforyouthesame——ifyouwerethesameperson;butyou’renotthesame,andyouknowit。Itoldyouthen——thattimethatIdidn’twanttomakeyoudowhatyouknewwasright,andInevershalltrytodoitagain。
I’msorryIdiditthen。Iwaswrong。AndIshouldbeafraidofyouifIdidnow。Sometimeyouwouldmakemesufferforit,justasyou’vemademesufferformakingyoudothenwhatwasright。\"
ItstruckJeffasaverycuriousfactthatCynthiamustalwayshaveknownhimbetterthanheknewhimselfinsomeways,forhenowperceivedthetruthandaccuracyofherwords。Hegavehermindcreditforthepenetrationdueherheart;hedidnotunderstandthatitisthroughtheirlovewomendivinethesoulsofmen。Whatotherwitnessesofhischaracterhadslowlyandcarefullyreasonedoutfromtheirexperienceofhimshehadknownfromthebeginning,becausehewasdeartoher。
Hewassilent,andthen,withraregravity,hesaid,\"Cynthia,Ibelieveyou’reright,\"andheneverknewhowherheartleapedtowardhimathiswords。\"I’maprettybadchap,Iguess。ButIwantyoutogivemeanotherchanceandI’lltrynottomakeyoupayforit,either,\"headded,withaflickerofhissaucyhumor。
\"I’llgiveyouachance,then,\"shesaid,andsheshrankfromthehandheputouttowardher。\"Gobackandtellthatgirlyou’refreenow,andifshewantsyoushecanhaveyou。\"
\"Isthatwhatyoucallachance?\"demandedJeff,betweenangerandinjury。Foraninstantheimaginedherderidinghimandrevengingherself。
\"It’stheonlyoneIcangiveyou。She’snevertriedtomakeyoudowhatwasright,andyou’llneverbetemptedtohurther。\"
\"You’reprettyroughonme,Cynthy,\"Jeffprotested,almostplaintively。
Heasked,moreincharacter:\"Ain’tyouafraidofmakingmedoright,now?\"
\"I’mnotmakingyou。Idon’tpromiseyouanything,evenifshewon’thaveyou。\"
\"Oh!\"
\"DidyousupposeIdidn’tmeanthatyouwerefree?ThatIwouldputalieinyourmouthforyoutobetruewith?\"
\"Iguessyou’retoodeepforme,\"saidJeff,afterasulkysilence。
\"Thenit’salloffbetweenus?Whatdoyousay?\"
\"Whatdoyousay?\"
\"Isayit’sjustasitwasbefore,ifyoucareforme。\"
\"Icareforyou,butitcanneverbethesameasitwasbefore。Whatyou’vedone,you’vedone。IwishIcouldhelpit,butIcan’t。Ican’tmakemyselfoverintowhatIwastwenty—fourhoursago。Iseemanotherperson,inanotherworld;it’sasifIdied,andcametolifesomewhereelse。I’msorryenough,ifthatcouldhelp,butitcan’t。Goandtellthatgirlthetruth:thatyoucameupheretome,andIsentyoubacktoher。\"
AgleamofamusementvisitedJeffinthegloomwhereheseemedtobedarkling。HefancieddoingthatverythingwithBessieLynde,andthewildjoyshewouldsnatchfromanexperiencesounique,soimpossible。
Thenthegleamfaded。\"AndwhatifIdidn’twanther?\"hedemanded。
\"Tellherthattoo,\"saidCynthia。
\"Isuppose,\"saidJeff,sulkily,\"you’llletmegoawayanddoasI
please,ifI’mfree。\"
\"Ohyes。Idon’twantyoutodoanythingbecauseItoldyou。Iwon’tmakethatmistakeagain。Goanddowhatyouareabletodoofyourownfreewill。YouknowwhatyououghttodoaswellasIdo;andyouknowagreatdealbetterwhatyoucando。\"
TheyhadreachedCynthia’shouse,andtheyweretalkingatthesidedoor,astheyhadthenightbefore,whentherehadbeenhopeforherinthenewnessofhercalamity,beforeshehadyetfullyimaginedit。
Jeffmadenoanswertoherlastwords。Heasked,\"AmIgoingtoseeyouagain?\"
\"Iguessnot。Idon’tbelieveIshallbeupbeforeyoustart。\"
\"Allright。Good—bye,then。\"Heheldouthishand,andsheputhersinitforthemomenthechosetoholdit。Thenheturnedandslowlyclimbedthehill。
Cynthiawasstilllyingwithherfaceinherpillowwhenherfathercameintothedarklittlehouse,andpeeredintoherroomwiththenewlylightedlampinhishand。Sheturnedherfacequicklyoverandlookedathimwithdryandshiningeyes。
\"Well,it’salloverwithJeffandme,father。\"
\"Well,I’msatisfied,\"saidWhitwell。\"Ifyoucouldha’madeitup,soyoucouldha’feltrightaboutit,Ishouldn’tha’hadanythingtosayagainstit,butI’mgladit’sturnedoutthewayithas。He’sacomicaldevil,andhealwayswas,andI’mgladyoua’n’ttakin’onabouthimanymore。Youusedtohavesomuchspiritwhenyouwaslittle。\"
\"Oh,——spirit!Youdon’tknowhowmuchspiritI’vehad,now。\"
\"Well,Ipresumenot,\"Whitwellassented。
\"I’vebeenthinking,\"saidthegirl,afteralittlepause,\"thatweshallhavetogoawayfromhere。\"
\"Well,Iguessnot,\"herfatherbegan。\"NotfornoJeffDur——\"
\"Yes,yes。Wemust!Don’tmakeonetalkaboutit。We’llstayheretillJacksongetsbackinJune,andthen——wemustgosomewhereelse。We’llgodowntoBoston,andI’lltrytogetaplacetoteach,orsomething,andFrankcangetaplace。\"
\"Ipresume,\"Whitwellmused,\"thatMr。Westovercould——\"
\"Father!\"criedthegirl,withanenergythatstartledhim,assheliftedherselfonherelbow。\"Don’teverthinkoftroublingMr。Westover!Oh,\"
shelamented,\"Iwasthinkingoftroublinghimmyself!Butwemustn’t,wemustn’t!Ishouldbesoashamed!\"
\"Well,\"saidWhitwell,\"timeenoughtothinkaboutallthat。WegottwogoodmonthsyettoplanitoutbeforeJacksongetsback,andIguesswecanthinkofsomethingbeforethat。Ipresume,\"headded,thoughtfully,\"thatwhenMrs。Durginhearsthatyou’vegiveJeffthesack,she’llmakeconsid’ableofakick。Shedoneitwhenyougotengaged。\"
XLVII。
AfterhewentbacktoCambridge,Jeffcontinuedmechanicallyinthedirectiongivenhimbymotiveswhichhadceasedforhim。InthemidstofhisdivergencewithBessieLyndehehadstillkeptaninnerfealtytoCynthia,andtriedtofulfilthepurposesandambitionshehadforhim。
Theoperationofthishabitualallegiancenowkepthimuptohiswork,butthetimemustcomewhenitcouldnolongeroperate,whenhiswholeconsciousnessshouldacceptthefactknowntohisintelligence,andheshouldrecognizethecloseofthatincidentofhislifeasthebereavedfinallyacceptandrecognizethefactofdeath。
Theeventbroughthimrelief,anditbroughthimfreedom。Hewassensibleinhisrelaxationofhavingstraineduptoanother’sideal,ofhavingbeenhamperedbyanother’swill。Hispleasureinthereliefwastemperedbyaregret,notwhollyunpleasant,forthegirlwhoseaims,sincetheywerenolongerhis,mustbedisappointed。HewassorryforCynthia,andinhisremorsehewasfonderofherthanhehadeverbeen。
Hefelthermagnanimityandclemency;hebegantoquestion,inthatwordlessdeepofbeingwherevolitionbegins,whetheritwouldnotbepayingakindofdutytoherifhetookheratherwordandtriedtogobacktoBessieLynde。Butforthepresenthedidnothingbutrenounceallnotionofworkingathisconditions,orattemptingtotakeadegree。
Thatwaspartofathingthatwaspast,andwasnopartofanythingtocome,sofarasJeffnowforecasthisfuture。
HedidnotchoosetoreporthimselftoWestover,andriskascolding,orasnubbing。HeeasilyforgaveWestoverforthetonehehadtakenattheirlastmeeting,buthedidnotcaretoseehim。Hewouldhavemethimhalf—way,however,inafriendlyadvance,andhewasawareofmuchgood—willtowardhim,whichhecouldnothavebeenreluctanttoshowifchancehadbroughtthemtogether。
JeffmissedCynthia’sletterswhichusedtocomesoregularlyeveryTuesday,andhehadahalf—houreverySundaywhichwasatfirstratherpainfullyvacantsincehenolongerwrotetoher。Butinthisvacancyhehadatleastnolongerthepangofself—reproachwhichherlettersalwaysbroughthim,andhewasnotobligedtoputhimselftotheshameofconcealmentinwritingtoher。Hehadnevermindedthattacitlyingonhisownaccount,buthehateditinrelationtoher;italwayshurthimassomethingincongruousandunfit。HewrotetohismothernowonSunday,andinhisfirstletter,whiletheimpressionofCynthia’sdignityandgenerositywasstillvivid,heurgedhertomakeitcleartothegirlthathewishedherandherfamilytoremainatLion’sHeadasifnothinghadhappened。Heputagreatdealofrealfeelingintothisrequest,andheofferedtogoandspendayearinEurope,ifhismotherthoughtthatCynthiawouldbemorereconciledtohiscomingbackattheendofthattime。
Hismotheransweredwithadrynesstowhichhisearsuppliedthetonesofhervoice,thatshewouldtrytogetalonginthemanagementofLion’sHeadtillhisbrothergotback,butthatshehadnoobjectiontohisgoingtoEuropeforayearifhehadthemoneytospare。Jeffcouldnotrefuseherjoke,ashefeltit,acertainapplause,buthethoughtitprettyroughthathismothershouldtakepartsodecidedlyagainsthimassheseemedtobedoing。Hehadexpectedhertobeangrywithhim,butbeforetheypartedshehadseemedtofindsomeexcuseforhim,andyethereshewassidingagainstherownsoninwhathemightverywellconsideranunnaturalway。IfJacksonhadbeenathomehewouldhavelaidittohischarge;butheknewthatCynthiawouldhavescornedeventospeakofhimwithhismother,andheknewtoowellhismother’sslightforWhitwelltosupposethathecouldhaveinfluencedher。HismindturnedinmomentarysuspiciontoWestover。HadWestover,hewondered,withapurposetopayhimupforitformingitselfsimultaneouslywithhisquestion,beensettinghismotheragainsthim?ShemighthavewrittentoWestovertogetatthetrueinwardnessofhisbehavior,andWestovermighthavewrittenhersomethingthathadmadeherhardenherheartagainsthim。Butuponreflectionthisseemedoutofcharacterforbothofthem;andJeffwasthrownbackuponhismother’ssobersecondthoughtofhismisconductforanexplanationofhercoldness。Hecouldnotdenythathehadgrievouslydisappointedherinseveralways。
Buthedidnotseewhyheshouldnottakeacertainhintfromherletter,orconstructahintfromit,atonewithavagueintentpromptedbyhisownrestlessandcuriousvanity。SincehehadpartedwithBessieLynde,ontermsofhumiliationforherwhichmusthavebeenanguishforhimifhehadeverlovedher,orlovedanythingbuthispoweroverher,hehadremainedinabsoluteignoranceofher。Hehadnotheardwhereshewasorhowshewas;butnow,asthefewweeksbeforeClassDayandCommencementcrumbledaway,hebegantowonderwhyshemadenosign。Hebelievedthatsinceshehadbeenwillingtogosofartogethim,shewouldnotbewillingtogivehimupsoeasily。ThethoughtofCynthiahadalwaysintrudedmoreorlesseffectivelybetweenthem,butnowthatthisthoughtbegantofadeintothepast,thethoughtofBessiebegantogrowoutofitwithnointerposingshadow。
However,Jeffwasinnohurry。Itwasnotpassionthatmovedhim,andthemoodinwhichhecouldplaywiththenotionofgettingbacktohisflirtationwithBessieLyndewaspleasanteraftertheviolenceofrecenteventsthananyrenewalofstrongsensationscouldbe。Hepreferredtoloiterinthismood,andhewasmeantimemuchmorecomfortablethanhehadbeenforagreatwhile。HewasridofthedisagreeablesenseofdisloyaltytoCynthia,andhewasridofthestressoflivinguptoherconscienceinvariousways。HewasridofBessieLynde,too,andofthetroubleofforecastinganddiscountinghercaprices。Histhoughtturnedattimeswithasoftregrettohopes,disappointments,experiencesconnectedwithneither,andnowtingedwithatendermelancholy,unalloyedbyshameorremorse。AshedrewnearertoClassDayhehadasomewhatkeenercompunctionforCynthiaandthehopeshehadencouragedhertobuildandhadthendashed。Buthewascomingmoreandmoretoregarditallasfatality;andifthechancethathecountedupontobringhimandBessietogetheragainhadoccurredhecouldhavemoreeasilyforgivenhimself。
Oneofthejays,whowasspreadingonratheralargescale,wantedJefftospreadwithhim,butherefused,because,ashesaid,hemeanttokeepoutofitaltogether;andforthesamereasonhedeclinedtotakepartinthespreadofaratherjaysocietyhebelongedto。InhissecrethearthetrustedthatsomefriendlyfortuitymightthrowaninvitationtoBeckHallinhisway,oratleastacardfortheGym,which,ifnolongertheplaceithadbeen,wasstillbynomeansjay。Hegotneither;butashefeltallthejoyoftheJunedayinhisyoungbloodheconsoledhimselfverywellwiththedancingatoneofthehalls,wherethecompanyhappenedthatyeartobeopenly,almostrecklesslyjay。Jeffhadsomedistinctionamongthefellowswhoenviouslyknewofhissocialsuccessduringthewinter,andespeciallyofhisaffairwithBessieLynde;andthereweresomegirlsveryprettyandverywelldressedamongthecrowdofgirlswhowereneither。Theywerefromremotepartsofthecountry,andinthechargeofchaperonsignorantofthedifferencessopoignanttolocalsociety。Jeffwentaboutamongthem,anddancedwiththesistersandcousinsofseveralmenwhoseemedsuperiortothelostconditionoftheirkinswomen;thesewerenicefellowsenough,butdoomedbytheirgrinding,ordigging,ortheirwantofworldlywisdom,toaplaceamongthejays,whentheyreallyhadsomequalificationsforanoblerstanding。
Hehadaverygoodtime,andhewasenjoyinghimselfinhisdevotiontoalivelyyoungbrunettewhomhewasmakinglaughwithhisjokesaboutsomeoftheothers,whenhiseyewascaughtbyagroupofladieswhoadvancedamongthejayswithsomethingofthatcollectiveintrepidityandindividualapprehensioncharacteristicofpeopleinslumming。Theyhadtheairofnotknowingwhatmighthappentothem,buttheadventurousyoungBostonmatroninchargeofthegirlskeptonaboldfrontbehindherlorgnette,andsweptthestrangecompanyshefoundherselfinwithanunshrinkingeyeassheledherbandamongthepromenaders,andpastthecouplesseatedalongthewalls。ShehesitatedamomentasherglancefelluponJeff,andthensheyielded,atwhateverrisk,tothecomfortoffindingaknownfaceamongsomanyaliens。\"Why,Mr。Durgin!\"shecalledout。\"Bessie,here’sMr。Durgin,\"andsheturnedtothegirl,whowasinhertrain,asJeffhadperceivedbysomethingfinerthanthesensesfromthefirst。
Herosefromthesideofhisbrunette,whosebrotherwasstandingnear,andshookhandswiththeadventurousyoungmatron,whoseemedsuddenlymuchbetteracquaintedwithhimthanhehadeverthoughther,andwithBessieLynde;theotherswereNewYorkgirls,andthematronpresentedhim。\"Areyougoingon?\"sheasked,andthevaguechallengewiththesmilethataccompanieditwassufficientinvitationforhim。
\"Why,Ibelieveso,\"hesaid,andheturnedtotakeleaveofhisprettybrunette;butshehadpromptlyvanishedwithherbrother,andhewassparedthetroubleofgettingridofher。HewouldhavebeenequaltomuchmoreforthesakeoffindinghimselfwithBessieLyndeagain,whoseexcitementhecouldseeburninginhereyes,thoughherthickcomplexiongrewneitherbrighternorpaler。Hedidnotknowwhatqualityofexcitementitmightbe,buthesaid,audaciously:\"It’sagoodwhilesincewemet!\"andhewassensiblethathisaudacityavailed。
\"Isit?\"sheasked。Heputhimselfatherside,andhedidnotleaveheragaintillhewenttodressforthestrugglearoundtheTree。Hefoundhimselfeasilyincludedintheadventurousyoungmatron’sparty。Hehadnottheeleganceofsomeofthetallerandslenderermeninthescholar’sgown,butthecapbecamehishandsomeface。HisaffairwithBessieLyndehadgivenhimacertainnote,andanadventurousyoungmatron,whowasnaturallyalittleindiscriminate,mightverywellhavebeenwillingtolethimgoaboutwithherparty。ShecouldnotknowhowimpudenthismerepresencewaswithreferencetoBessie,andthegirlherselfmadenosignthatcouldhaveenlightenedher。Sheacceptedsomethingmorethathershareofhisgeneralusefulnesstotheparty;shedancedwithhimwheneverheaskedher,andsheseemednottoscrupletopublishheraffairwithhimintheopenestmanner。Ifhecouldhavestilledacertainshameforherwhichhefelt,hewouldhavethoughthewashavingthebestkindoftime。Theymadenoaccountofby—gonesintheirtalk,butshehadneverbeensobrilliant,orpromptedhimtosomanyoftheeffronterieswhichwerethespiritofhishumor。Hethoughtherawfullynice,withlotsofsense;helikedherlettinghimcomebackwithoutanyfoolingorfuss,andhebegantoadmireinsteadofdespisingherforit。
Decidedlyitwas,asshewouldhavesaid,thechicquestsortofthing。
Whatwastheuse,anyway?Hemadeuphismind。
WhenhesaidhemustgoanddressfortheTree,hetookleaveofherfirst,andhewasawareofavividemotion,whichwaslikeregretinheratpartingwithhim。Shesaid,Musthe?Sheseemedtowanttosaysomethingmoretohim;whilehewasdismissinghimselffromtheothers,henoticedthatonceortwicesheopenedherlipsasifsheweregoingtospeak。Intheendshedidnothingmoreimportantthantoaskifhehadseenherbrother;butafterhehadleftthepartyheturnedandsawherfollowinghimwitheyesthathefanciedanxiousandevenfrightenedintheirgaze。
TheriotroundtheTreeroareditselfthroughitswontedevents。Classafterclassoftheundergraduatesfiledinandsankuponthegrassbelowtheterracesandparterresofbrilliantlydressedladieswithinthequadrangleofseats;thealumnipushedthemselvestogetheragainstthewallofHolderChapel;themenoftheSeniorclasscamelastintheirgrotesquevarietyofsweatersandsecondandthirdbestclothesforthescrambleattheTree。Theregulationcheerstorefromthroatsthatgrewhoarserandhoarser,tilleveryclassandeveryfavoriteinthefacultyhadbeencheered。Thenthesignal—hatwasflungintotheair,andtherushattheTreewasmade,andthecombat’fortheflowersthatgarlandeditsburlywaistbegan。
Jeff’ssizeandshapeforbadehimtotryfortheflowersfromtheshouldersofothers。HewasoneofagroupofjayswhosettheirbackstotheTree,andfoughtawayallcomersexcepttheirown;theypulleddowneverymannotoftheirsort,andputupajay,whostrippedtheTreeofitsflowersandflungthemtohisfellowsbelow。Ashewasletdroptotheground,Jeffsnatchedahandfulofhisspoilfromhim,andmadeoffwithittowardtheplacewherehehadseenBessieLyndeandherparty。Butwhenhereachedtheplace,shoulderingandelbowinghiswaythroughthepress,shewasnolongerthere。Hesawherhatatadistancethroughthecrowd,wherehedidnotchoosetofollow,andhestuffedtheflowersintohisbreasttogivetoherlater。Heexpectedtomeethersomewhereintheevening;ifnot,hewouldtrytofindheratheraunt’shouseintown;failingthat,hecouldsendhertheflowers,andtrustherforsomesortofleadingacknowledgment。
Hewentandhadabathanddressedhimselffreshly,andthenhewentforawalkinthestilleveningair。Hewasveryhotfromthebattlewhichhadbeenfoughtoverhim,andwhichhehadsharedwithallhisstrength,anditseemedtohimasifhecouldnotgetcool。HestrolledfaroutalongConcordAvenue,beyondtheexpansesandice—horsesofFreshPond,intothecountrytowardBelmont,withhishatoffandhisheaddown。Hewasverywellsatisfied,andhewassmilingtohimselfattheeaseofhisreturntoBessie,andsecurelyspeculatingupontheoutcomeoftheirrenewedunderstanding。
Heheardavehiclebehindhim,rapidlydriven,andheturnedoutforitwithoutlookingaround。Thensuddenlyhefeltafierystingonhisforehead,andthenashowerofstingsswiftlyfollowingeachotheroverhisheadandface。Herememberedstumbling,whenhewasaboy,intoanestofyellow—jackets,thatswarmeduparoundhimandpiercedhimlikesparksoffireateveryuncoveredpoint。Butheknewatthesametimethatitwassomeoneinthevehiclebesidehimwhowaslashinghimovertheheadwithawhip。Hebowedhisheadwithhiseyesshutandlungedblindlyouttowardhisassailant,hopingtoseizehim。
Butthehorsesprangaside,andtorepasthimdowntheroad。Jeffopenedhiseyes,andthroughthebloodthatdrippedfromthecutsabovethemhesawthewickedfaceofAlanLyndelookingbackathimfromthedogcartwherehesatwithhismanbesidehim。Hebrandishedhisbrokenwhipintheair,andflungitintothebushes。Jeffwalkedon,andpickeditup,beforeheturnedasidetothepoolsofthemarshstretchingoneitherhand,andtriedtostanchhishurts,andgethimselfintoshapeforreturningtotownandstealingbacktohislodging。Hehadtowaittillafterdark,andwatchhischancetogetintothehouseunnoticed。
XLVIII
ThechumtowhomJeffconfidedthestoryofhisencounterwithamanheleftnamelessinwardlythankedfortunethathewasnotthatman;forheknewhimdestinedsoonerorlatertomakesuchreparationfortheinjurieshehadinflictedasJeffchosetoexact。Hetendedhimcarefully,andrespectedthereticenceJeffguardedconcerningthewholematter,evenwiththeyoungdoctorwhomhisfriendcalled,andwhokepttohimselfhisimpressionsofthenatureofJeff’sinjuries。
Jefflayinhisdarkenedroom,andburnedwiththem,andwiththethoughts,guesses,purposeswhichflamedthroughhismind。Hadshe,thatgirl,knownwhatherbrothermeanttodo?Hadshewishedhimtothinkofherinthemomentofhispunishment,andhadshespokenofherbrothersothathemightrecallher,orhadshehadsomeineffectiveimpulsetowarnhimagainstherbrotherwhenshespokeofhim?
Helayandragedinvainwithhisconjectures,andhedidathousandimaginedmurdersuponLyndeinrevengeofhisshame。
Towardtheendoftheweek,whilehishurtswerestilltooevidenttoallowhimtogoout—of—doorsbeforedark,hehadanotefromWestoveraskinghimtocomeinatoncetoseehim。
\"YourbrotherJackson,\"Westoverwrote,\"reachedBostonbytheNewYorktrainthismorning,andiswithmehere。ImusttellyouIthinkheisnotatallwell,buthedoesnotknowhowsickheis,andsoIforewarnyou。Hewantstogetonhome,butIdonotfeeleasyaboutlettinghimmaketherestofthejourneyalone。Someoneoughttogowithhim。I
writenotknowingwhetheryouarestillinCambridgeornot;orwhether,ifyouare,youcangetawayatthistime。ButIthinkyonought,andI
wish,atanyrate,thatyouwouldcomeinatonceandseeJackson。Thenwecansettlewhathadbestbedone。\"