第5章
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  \"Comeoutintheball,\"saidMr。McQuirk。\"I

  wanttoaskyeropinionoftheweather—onthelevel。\"

  \"Areyoucrazy,sure?\"saidAnnieMaria。

  \"Iam,\"saidthe\"Tiger。\"\"They’vebeentellingmealldaytherewasspringintheair。Weretheyliars?OramI?\"

  \"Dearme!\"saidAnnieMaria——\"haven’tyouno—

  ticedit?Icanalmostsmelltheviolets。Andthegreengrass。Ofcourse,thereain’tanyyet——it’sjustakindoffeeling,youknow。\"

  \"That’swhatI’mgettingat,\"saidMr。McQuirk。

  I’vehadit。Ididn’trecognizeitatfirst。I

  thoughtmaybeitwasen—wee,contractedtheotherdaywhenIsteppedaboveFourteenthStreet。ButthekatzenjammerI’vegotdon’tspellviolets。Itspellsyerownname,AnnieMaria,andit’syouI

  want。IgotoworknextMonday,andImakefourdollarsaday。Spielup,oldgirl——dowemakeateam?\"

  \"Jimmy,\"sighedAnnieMaria,suddenlydisap—

  pearinginhisovercoat,\"don’tyouseethatspringisallovertheworldrightthisminute?\"

  Butyouyourselfrememberhowthatdayended。

  Beginningwithsofineapromiseofvernalthings,lateintheafternoontheairchilledandaninchofsnowfell——evensolateinMarch。OnFifthAve—

  nuetheladiesdrewtheirwinterfurscloseaboutthem。Onlyintheflorists’windowscouldbeper—

  ceivedanysignsofthemorningsmileofthecominggoddessEastre。

  Atsixo’clockHerrLutzbegantoclosehisshop。

  Hebeardawell—knownshout:\"Hello,Dutch!\"

  \"Tiger\"McQuirk,inhisshirt—sleeves,withhishatonthebackofhisbead,stoodoutsideinthewhirlingsnow,puffingatablackcigar。

  \"Donnerwetter!\"shoutedLutz,\"dervinter,hehasgomebackagainyet!\"

  \"Yeraliar,Dutch,\"calledbackMr。McQuirk,withfriendlygeniality,it’sspringtime,bythewatch。\"

  THEFOOL—KILLER

  DownSouthwheneveranyoneperpetratessomeparticularlymonumentalpieceoffoolishnessevery—

  bodysays:\"SendforJesseHolmes。\"

  JesseHolmesistheFool—Killer。Ofcourseheisamyth,likeSantaClausandJackFrostandGeneralProsperityandallthoseconcreteconceptionsthataresupposedtorepresentanideathatNaturehasfailedtoembody。ThewisestoftheSouthronscan—

  nottellyouwhencecomestheFool—Killer’sname;

  butfewandhappyarethehouseholdsfromtheRo—

  anoketotheRioGrandeinwhichthenameofJesseHolmeshasnotbeenpronouncedorinvoked。Alwayswithasmile,andoftenwithatear,ishesummonedtohisofficialduty。AbusymanisJesseHolmes。

  IremembertheclearpictureofhimthathungonthewallsofmyfancyduringmybarefootdayswhenIwasdodginghisoft—threateneddevoirs。Tomebewasaterribleoldman,ingrayclothes,withalong,ragged,graybeard,andreddish,fierceeyes。

  Ilookedtoseehimcomestumpinguptheroadinacloudofdust,withawhiteoakstaffinhishandandhisshoestiedwithleatherthongs。Imayyet——

  Butthisisastory,notasequel。

  Ihavetakennoticewithregret,thatfewstoriesworthreadinghavebeenwrittenthatdidnotcon—

  taindrinkofsomesort。Downgothefluids,fromArizonaDick’sthreefingersofredpizentothein—

  efficaciousOolongthatnervesLionelMontressortoreparteeinthe\"DottyDialogues。\"So,insuchgoodcompanyImayintroduceanabsinthedrip——

  oneabsinthedrip,drippedthroughasilverdripper,orderly,opalescent,cool,green—eyed——deceptive。

  Kernerwasafool。Besidesthat,hewasanartistandmygoodfriend。Now,ifthereisonethingonearthutterlydespicabletoanother,itisanartistintheeyesofanauthorwhosestoryhehasillus—

  trated。Justtryitonce。WriteastoryaboutaminingcampinIdiho。Sellit。Spendthemoney,andthen,sixmonthslater,borrowaquarter(oradime),andbuythemagazinecontainingit。Youfindafull—pagewashdrawingofyourhero,BlackBill,thecowboy。Somewhereinyourstoryyouem—

  ployedtheword\"horse。\"Aha!theartisthasgraspedtheidea。BlackBillhasontheregulationtrousersoftheM。F。H。oftheWestchesterCountyHunt。Hecarriesaparlorrifle,andwearsamon—

  ocle。InthedistanceisasectionofForty—secondStreetduringasearchforalostgas—pipe,andtheTajMahal,thefamousmausoleuminIndia。

  \"Enough!IhatedKerner,andonedayImethimandwebecamefriends。Hewasyoungandglori—

  ouslymelancholybecausehisspiritsweresohighandlifebadsomuchinstoreforhim。Yes,hewasalmostriotouslysad。Thatwashisyouth。Whenamanbeginstobehilariousinasorrowfulwayyoucanbetamillionthatheisdyeinghishair。Ker—

  ner’shairwasplentifulandcarefullymattedasanartist’sthatchshouldbe。Hewasacigaretteur,andbeauditedhisdinnerswithredwine。But,mostofall,bewasafool。And,wisely,Ienviedhim,andlistenedpatientlywhileheknockedVelasquezandTintoretto。Oncehetoldmethathelikedastoryofminethathebadcomeacrossinananthology。Hedescribedittome,andIwassorrythatMr。Fitz—

  JamesO’Brienwasdeadandcouldnotlearnoftheeulogyofhiswork。ButmostlyKernermadefewbreaksandwasaconsistentfool。

  I’dbetterexplainwhatImeanbythat。Therewasagirl。Now,agirl,asfarasIamconcerned,isathingthatbelongsinaseminaryoranalbum;

  butIconcededtheexistenceoftheanimalinordertoretainKerner’sfriendship。Heshowedmeherpictureinalocket——shewasablondeorabrunette——Ihaveforgottenwhich。Sheworkedinafactoryforeightdollarsaweek。Lestfactoriesquotethiswagebywayofvindication,Iwilladdthatthegirlbadworkedforfiveyearstoreachthatsupremeele—

  vationofremuneration,beginningat$1。50perweek。

  Kerner’sfatherwasworthacoupleofmillionsHewaswillingtostandforart,buthedrewthelineatthefactorygirl。SoKernerdisinheritedhisfatherandwalkedouttoacheapstudioandlivedonsausagesforbreakfastandonFarronifordinner。

  Farronihadtheartisticsoulandalineofcreditforpaintersandpoets,nicelyadjusted。SometimesKer—

  riersoldapictureandboughtsomenewtapestry,aringandadozensilkcravats,andpaidFarronitwodollarsonaccount。

  OneeveningKernerhadmetodinnerwithhimselfandthefactorygirl。TheyweretobemarriedassoonasKernercouldsloshpaintprofitably。Asfortheex—father’stwomillions——pouf!

  Shewasawonder。Smallandhalf—waypretty,andasmuchathereaseinthatcheapcafeasthoughshewereonlyinthePalmerHouse,Chicago,withasouvenirspoonalreadysafelyhiddeninhershirtwaist。Shewasnatural。TwothingsInoticedaboutherespecially。Herbeltbucklewasexactlyinthemiddleofherback,andshedidn’ttellusthatalargemanwitharubystick—pinhadfollowedherupallthewayfromFourteenthStreet。WasKernersuchafool?

  Iwondered。AndthenIthoughtofthequantityofstripedcuffsandblueglassbeadsthat$2,000,000

  canbuyfortheheathen,andIsaidtomyselfthathewas。AndthenElise——certainlythatwashernametoldus,merrily,thatthebrownspotonherwaistwascausedbyherlandladyknockingatthedoorwhileshe(thegirl——confoundtheEnglishlanguage)

  washeatinganironoverthegasjet,andshehidtheironunderthebedclothesuntilthecoastwasclear,andtherewasthepieceofchewinggumstucktoitwhenshebegantoironthewaist,and——well,Iwonderedbowintheworldthechewinggumcametobethere——don’ttheyeverstopchewingit?

  Awhileafterthat——don’tbeimpatient,theab—

  sinthedripiscomingnow——KernerandIwerediningatFarroni’s。Amandolinandaguitarwerebeingattacked;theroomwasfullofsmokeinnice,longcrinklylayersjustliketheartistsdrawthesteamfromaplumpuddingonChristmasposters,andaladyinabluesilkandgasolinedgauntletswasbe—

  ginningtobumanairfromtheCatskills。

  \"Kerner,\"saidI,\"youareafool。\"

  \"Ofcourse,\"saidKerner,\"Iwouldn’tlethergoonworking。Notmywife。What’stheusetowait?

  She’swilling。IsoldthatwatercolorofthePali—

  sadesyesterday。Wecouldcookonatwo—burnergasstove。YouknowtheragoutsIcanthrowtogether?

  Yes,Ithinkwewillmarrynextweek。\"

  \"Kerner,\"saidI,\"youareafool。\"

  \"Haveanabsinthedrip?\"saidKerner,grandly。

  \"To—nightyouaretheguestofArtinpayingquan—

  tities。Ithinkwewillgetaflatwithabath。\"

  \"Inevertriedone——Imeananabsinthedrip,\"

  saidI。

  Thewaiterbroughtitandpouredthewaterslowlyovertheiceinthedripper。

  \"ItlooksexactlyliketheMississippiRiverwaterinthebigbendbelowNatchez,\"saidI,fascinated,gazingatthebe—muddleddrip。

  \"Therearesuchflatsforeightdollarsaweek,\"

  saidKerner。

  \"Youareafool,\"saidI,andbegantosipthefiltration。\"Whatyouneed,\"Icontinued,\"istheofficialattentionofoneJesseHolmes。\"

  Kerner,notbeingaSoutherner,didnotcompre—

  hend,sohesat,sentimental,figuringonhisflatinhissordid,artisticway,whileIgazedintothegreeneyesofthesophisticatedSpiritofWormwood。

  PresentlyInoticedcasuallythataprocessionofbacchanteslimnedonthewallimmediatelybelowtheceilingbadbeguntomove,traversingtheroomfromrighttoleftinagayandspectacularpilgrimage。I

  didnotconfidemydiscoverytoKerner。Theartistictemperamentistoohigh—strungtoviewsuchdevia—

  tionsfromthenaturallawsoftheartofkalsomining。

  Isippedmyabsinthedripandsawedwormwood。

  Oneabsinthedripisnotmuch——butIsaidagaintoKerner,kindly:

  \"Youareafool。\"Andthen,inthevernacular:

  \"JesseHolmesforyours。\"

  AndthenIlookedaroundandsawtheFool—Killer,ashehadalwaysappearedtomyimagination,sittingatanearbytable,andregardinguswithhisreddish,fatal,relentlesseyes。HewasJesseHolmesfromtoptotoe;hehadthelong,gray,raggedbeard,thegrayclothesofancientcut,theexecutioner’slook,andthedustyshoesofonewhobadbeencalledfromafar。HiseyeswereturnedfixedlyuponKerner。I

  shudderedtothinkthatIbadinvokedhimfromhisassiduoussouthernduties。Ithoughtofflying,andthenIkeptmyseat,reflectingthatmanymenbades—

  capedhisministrationswhenitseemedthatnothingshortofanappointmentasAmbassadortoSpaincouldsavethemfromhim。IhadcalledmybrotherKernerafoolandwasindangerofhellfire。Thatwasnothing;butIwouldtrytosavehimfromJesseHolmes。

  TheFool—Killergotupfromhistableandcameovertoours。Herestedhishandsuponit,andturnedhisburning,vindictiveeyesuponKerner,ig—

  noringme。

  \"Youareahopelessfool,\"besaidtotheartist。

  \"Haven’tyouhadenoughofstarvationyet?Iof—

  feryouonemoreopportunity。Giveupthisgirlandcomebacktoyourhome。Refuse,andyoumusttaketheconsequences。\"

  TheFool—Killer’sthreateningfacewaswithinafootofhisvictim’s;buttomyhorror,Kernermadenottheslightestsignofbeingawareofhispresence。

  \"Wewillbemarriednextweek,\"bemutteredab—

  sent—mindedly。\"Withmystudiofurnitureandsomesecond—handstuffwecanmakeout。\"

  \"Youhavedecidedyourownfate,\"saidtheFool—

  Killer,inalowbutterriblevoice。\"Youmaycon—

  sideryourselfasonedead。Youhavehadyourlastchance。\"

  \"Inthemoonlight,\"wentonKerner,softly,\"wewillsitundertheskylightwithourguitarandsingawaythefalsedelightsofprideandmoney。\"

  \"Onyourownheadbeit,\"hissedtheFool—Killer,andmyscalpprickledwhenIperceivedthatneitherKerner’seyesnorhisearstooktheslightestcog—

  nizanceofJesseHolmes。AndthenIknewthatforsomereasontheveilhadbeenliftedformealone,andthatIbadbeenelectedtosavemyfriendfromde—

  structionattheFool—Killer’sbands。Somethingofthefearandwonderofitmusthaveshoweditselfinmyface。

  \"Excuseme,\"saidKerner,withhiswan,amiablesmile;\"wasItalkingtomyself?Ithinkitisgettingtobeahabitwithme。\"

  TheFool—KillerturnedandwalkedoutofFar—

  ronils。

  \"Waithereforme,\"saidI,rising;\"Imustspeaktothatman。Hadyounoanswerforhim?Becauseyouareafoolmustyoudielikeamouseunderhisfoot?Couldyounotutteronesqueakinyourowndefence?

  \"Youaredrunk,\"saidKerner,heartlessly。\"Nooneaddressedme。\"

  \"Thedestroyerofyourmind,\"saidI,\"stoodaboveyoujustnowandmarkedyouforhisvictim。

  Youarenotblindordeaf。\"

  \"Irecognizednosuchperson,\"saidKerner。\"I

  haveseennoonebutyouatthistable。Sitdown。

  Hereafteryoushallhavenomoreabsinthedrips。\"

  \"Waithere,\"saidI,furious;\"ifyoudon’tcareforyourownlife,Iwillsaveitforyou。\"

  Ihurriedoutandovertookthemaningrayhalf—

  waydowntheblock。HelookedasIbadseenhiminmyfancyathousandtimes—truculent,grayandawful。Hewalkedwiththewhiteoakstaff,andbutforthestreet—sprinklerthedustwouldhavebeenfly—

  ingunderhistread。

  Icaughthimbythesleeveandsteeredhimtoadarkangleofabuilding。Iknewhewasamyth,andIdidnotwantacoptoseemeconversingwithva—

  cancy,forImightlandinBellevueminusmysilvermatchboxanddiamondring。

  \"JesseHolmes,\"saidI,facinghimwithapparentbravery,\"Iknowyou。Ihaveheardofyouallmylife。Iknownowwhatascourgeyouhavebeentoyourcountry。Insteadofkillingfoolsyouhavebeenmurderingtheyouthandgeniusthatarenecessarytomakeapeopleliveandgrowgreat。Youareafoolyourself,Holmes;youbegankillingoffthebrightestandbestofourcountrymenthreegenerationsago,whentheoldandobsoletestandardsofsocietyandhonorandorthodoxywerenarrowandbigoted。YouprovedthatwhenyouputyourmurderousmarkuponmyfriendKerner——thewisestchapIeverknewinmylife。\"

  TheFool—Killerlookedatmegrimlyandclosely。

  \"You’veaqueerjag,\"saidhe,curiously。\"Oh,yes;Iseewhoyouarenow。Youweresittingwithhimatthetable。Well,ifI’mnotmistaken,Iheardyoucallhimafool,too。\"

  \"Idid,\"saidI。\"Idelightindoingso。Itisfromenvy。Byallthestandardsthatyouknowheisthemostegregiousandgrandiloquentandgorgeousfoolinalltheworld。That’swhyyouwanttokillhim。\"

  \"WouldyoumindtellingmewhoorwhatyouthinkIam?\"askedtheoldman。

  Ilaughedboisterouslyandthenstoppedsuddenly,forIrememberedthatitwouldnotdotobeseensohilariousinthecompanyofnothingbutabrickwall。

  \"YouareJesseHolmes,theFool—Killer,\"Isaid,solemnly,\"andyouaregoingtokillmyfriendKer—

  ner。Idon’tknowwhorangyouup,butifyoudokillhimI’llseethatyougetpinchedforit。Thatis,\"Iadded,despairingly,\"ifIcangetacoptoseeyou。Theyhaveapooreyeformortals,andIthinkitwouldtakethewholeforcetoroundupamythmur—

  derer。\"

  \"Well,\"saidtheFool—Killer,briskly,\"Imustbegoing。Youhadbettergohomeandsleepitoff。

  Good—night。\"

  AtthisIwasmovedbyasuddenfearforKernertoasofterandmorepleadingmood。Ileanedagainstthegrayman’ssleeveandbesoughthim:

  \"GoodMr。Fool—Killer,pleasedon’tkilllittleKer—

  ner。Whycan’tyougobackSouthandkillCon—

  gressmenandclay—catersandletusalone?Whydon’tyougouponFifthAvenueandkillmillionairesthatkeeptheirmoneylockedupandwon’tletyoungfoolsmarrybecauseoneof’emlivesonthewrongstreet?Comeandhaveadrink,Jesse。Willyounevergetontoyourjob?\"

  \"Doyouknowthisgirlthatyourfriendhasmadehimselfafoolabout?\"askedtheFool—Killer。

  \"Ihavethehonor,\"saidI,\"andthat’swhyI

  calledKernerafool。Heisafoolbecausehehaswaitedsolongbeforemarryingher。Heisafoolbecausebehasbeenwaitinginthehopesofgettingtheconsentofsomeabsurdtwo—million—dollar—foolparentorsomethingofthesort。\"

  \"Maybe,\"saidtheFool—Killer——\"maybeI——I

  mighthavelookedatitdifferently。WouldyoumindgoingbacktotherestaurantandbringingyourfriendKernerhere?\"

  \"OH,what’stheuse,Jesse,\"Iyawned。\"Hecan’tseeyou。Hedidn’tknowyouweretalkingtohimatthetable,Youareafictitiouscharacter,youknow。\"

  \"MaybeHecanthistime。Willyougofetchhim?\"

  \"Allright,\"saidI,\"butI’veasuspicionthatyou’renotstrictlysober,Jesse。Youseemtobewa—

  veringandlosingyouroutlines。Don’tvanishbeforeIgetback。\"

  IwentbacktoKernerandsaid:

  \"There’samanwithaninvisiblehomicidalmaniawaitingtoseeyououtside。Ibelievehewantstomurderyou。Comealong。Youwon’tseehim,sothere’snothingtobefrightenedabout。\"

  Kernerlookedanxious。

  \"Why,\"saidbe,\"Ihadnoideaoneabsinthewoulddothat。You’dbettersticktoWurzburger。

  I’llwalkhomewithyou。\"

  IledhimtoJesseHolmes’s。

  \"Rudolf,\"saidtheFool—Killer,\"I’llgivein。

  Bringheruptothehouse。Givemeyourhand,boy。\",\"Goodforyou,dad,\"saidKerner,shakinghandswiththeoldman。You’llneverregretitafteryouknowher。\"

  \"So,youdidseehimwhenhewastalkingtoyouatthetable?\"IaskedKerner。

  \"Wehadn’tspokentoeachotherinayear,\"saidKerner。\"It’sallrightnow。\"

  Iwalkedaway。

  \"Whereareyougoing?\"calledKerner。

  \"IamgoingtolookforJesseHolmes,\"Ian—

  swered,withdignityandreserve。

  TRANSIENTSINARCADIA

  ThereisahotelonBroadwaythathasescapeddiscoverybythesummer—resortpromoters。Itisdeepandwideandcool。Itsroomsarefinishedindarkoakofalowtemperature。Home—madebreezesanddeep—greenshrubberygiveitthedelightswithouttheinconveniencesoftheAdirondacks。Onecanmountitsbroadstaircasesorglidedreamilyupwardinitsaerialelevators,attendedbyguidesinbrassbut—

  tons,withaserenejoythatAlpineclimbershaveneverattained。ThereisachefinitskitchenwhowillprepareforyoubrooktroutbetterthantheWhiteMountainseverserved,seafoodthatwouldturnOldPointComfort——\"byGad,sah!\"——greenwithenvy,andMainevenisonthatwouldmelttheofficialheartofagamewarden。

  AfewhavefoundoutthisoasisintheJulydesertofManhattan。Duringthatmonthyouwillseethehotel’sreducedarrayofguestsscatteredluxuriouslyaboutinthecooltwilightof——itsloftydining—room,gazingatoneanotheracrossthesnowywasteofun—

  occupiedtables,silentlycongratulatory。

  Superfluous,watchful,pneumaticallymovingwait—

  ershovernear,supplyingeverywantbeforeitisex—

  pressed。ThetemperatureisperpetualApril。Theceilingispaintedinwatercolorstocounterfeitasum—

  merskyacrosswhichdelicatecloudsdriftanddonotvanishasthoseofnaturedotoourregret。

  Thepleasing,distantroarofBroadwayistrans—

  formedintheimaginationofthehappygueststothenoiseofawaterfallfillingthewoodswithitsrestfulsound。Ateverystrangefootstepthegueststurnananxiousear,fearfullesttheirretreatbediscoveredandinvadedbytherestlesspleasure—seekerswhoareforeverhoundingnaturetoherdeepestlairs。

  Thusinthedepopulatedcaravansarythelittlebandofconnoisseursjealouslybidethemselvesduringtheheatedseason,enjoyingtotheuttermostthede—

  lightsofmountainandseashorethatartandskillhavegatheredandservedtothem。

  InthisJulycametothehotelonewhosecardthatshesenttotheclerkforhernametoberegisteredread\"Mme。He1oiseD’ArcyBeaumont。\"

  MadameBeaumontwasaguestsuchastheHotelLotusloved。Shepossessedthefineairofthee1ite,temperedandsweetenedbyacordialgraciousnessthatmadethehotelemployeesherslaves。Bell—boysfoughtforthehonorofansweringherring;theclerks,butforthequestionofownership,wouldhavedeededtoherthehotelanditscontents;theotherguestsregardedherasthefinaltouchoffeminineexclusivenessandbeautythatrenderedtheentourageperfect。

  Thissuper—excellentguestrarelyleftthehotel。

  Herhabitswereconsonantwiththecustomsofthedis—

  criminatingpatronsoftheHotelLotus。Toenjoythatdelectablehostelryonemustforegothecityasthoughitwereleaguesaway。Bynightabriefex—

  cursiontothenearbyroofsisinorder;butduringthetorriddayoneremainsintheumbrageousfast—

  nessesoftheLotusasatrouthangspoisedinthepel—

  lucidsanctuariesofhisfavoritepool。,ThoughaloneintheHotelLotus,MadameBeau—

  montpreservedthestateofaqueenwhoselonelinesswasofpositiononly。Shebreakfastedatten,acool,sweet,leisurely,delicatebeingwhoglowedsoftlyinthedimnesslikeajasmineflowerinthedusk。

  ButatdinnerwasMadame’sgloryatitsheight。

  Sheworeagownasbeautifulandimmaterialasthemistfromanunseencataractinamountaingorge。

  Thenomenclatureofthisgownisbeyondtheguessofthescribe。Alwayspale—redrosesreposedagainstitslace—garnishedfront。Itwasagownthatthebead—waiterviewedwithrespectandmetatthedoor。

  YouthoughtofPariswhenyousawit,andmaybeofmysteriouscountesses,andcertainlyofVersaillesandrapiersandMrs。Fiskeandrouge—et—noir。TherewasanuntraceablerumorintheHotelLotusthatMadamewasacosmopolite,andthatshewaspullingwithherslenderwhitebandscertainstringsbetweenthenationsinthefavorofRussia。Beingaciti—

  zenessoftheworld’ssmoothestroadsitwassmallwonderthatshewasquicktorecognizeintherefinedpurlieusoftheHotelLotusthemostdesirablespotinAmericaforarestfulsojournduringtheheatofmid—

  summer。

  OnthethirddayofMadameBeaumont’sresidenceinthehotelayoungmanenteredandregisteredhim—

  selfasaguest。Hisclothing——tospeakofhispointsinapprovedorder——wasquietlyinthemode;

  hisfeaturesgoodandregular;hisexpressionthatofapoisedandsophisticatedmanoftheworld。Hein—

  formedtheclerkthathewouldremainthreeorfourdays,inquiredconcerningthesailingofEuropeansteamships,andsankintotheblissfulinanitionofthenonpareilhotelwiththecontentedairofatravellerinhisfavoriteinn。

  Theyoungman——nottoquestiontheveracityoftheregister——wasHaroldFarrington。HedriftedintotheexclusiveandcalmcurrentoflifeintheLotussotactfullyandsilentlythatnotaripplealarmedhisfellow—seekersafterrest。HeateintheLotusandofitspatronym,andwaslulledintoblissfulpeacewiththeotherfortunatemariners。InonedayheacquiredhistableandhiswaiterandthefearlestthepantingchasersafterreposethatkeptBroadwaywarmshouldpounceuponanddestroythiscontiguousbutcoverthaven。

  AfterdinneronthenextdayafterthearrivalofHaroldFarringtonMadameBeaumontdroppedherhandkerchiefinpassingout。Mr。Farringtonrecov—

  eredandreturneditwithouttheeffusivenessofaseekerafteracquaintance。

  PerhapstherewasamysticfreemasonrybetweenthediscriminatingguestsoftheLotus。Perhapstheyweredrawnonetoanotherbythefactoftheircommongoodfortuneindiscoveringtheacmeofsum—

  merresortsinaBroadwayhotel。Wordsdelicateincourtesyandtentativeindeparturefromformalitypassedbetweenthetwo。And,asifintheexpedientatmosphereofarealsummerresort,anacquaintancegrew,floweredandfructifiedonthespotasdoesthemysticplantoftheconjuror。Forafewmomentstheystoodonabalconyuponwhichthecorridorended,andtossedthefeatheryballofconversation。

  \"Onetiresoftheoldresorts,\"saidMadameBeau—

  mont,withafaintbutsweetsmile。\"Whatistheusetoflytothemountainsortheseashoretoescapenoiseanddustwhentheverypeoplethatmakebothfollowusthere?\"

  \"Evenontheocean,\"remarkedFarrington,sadly,\"thePhilistinesbeuponyou。Themostexclusivesteamersaregettingtobescarcelymorethanferryboats。Heavenhelpuswhenthesummerresorterdis—

  coversthattheLotusisfurtherawayfromBroadwaythanThousandIslandsorMackinac。\"

  \"Ihopeoursecretwillbesafeforaweek,any—

  how,\"saidMadame,withasighandasmile。\"IdonotknowwhereIwouldgoiftheyshoulddescenduponthedearLotus。Iknowofbutoneplacesode—

  lightfulinsummer,andthatisthecastleofCountPolinski,intheUralMountains。\"

  \"IhearthatBaden—BadenandCannesarealmostdesertedthisseason,\"saidFarrington。\"Yearbyyeartheoldresortsfallindisrepute。Perhapsmanyothers,likeourselves,areseekingoutthequietnooksthatareoverlookedbythemajority。\"

  \"Ipromisemyselfthreedaysmoreofthisdeliciousrest,\"saidMadameBeaumont。\"OnMondaytheCedricsails。\"

  HaroldFarrington’seyesproclaimedhisregret。

  \"ItoomustleaveonMonday,\"hesaid,\"butIdonotgoabroad。\"

  MadameBeaumontshruggedoneroundshoulderinaforeigngesture。

  \"Onecannotbidehereforever,charmingthoughitmaybe。Thechateauhasbeeninpreparationformelongerthanamonth。Thosehousepartiesthatonemustgive——whatanuisance!ButIshallneverfor—

  getmyweekintheHotelLotus。\"

  \"NorshallI,\"saidFarringtoninalowvoice,andIshallneverforgivetheCedric。\"

  OnSundayevening,threedaysafterward,thetwosatatalittletableonthesamebalcony。Adiscreetwaiterbroughticesandsmallglassesofclaretcup。

  MadameBeaumontworethesamebeautifuleven—

  inggownthatshehadworneachdayatdinner。Sheseemedthoughtful。Nearherhandonthetablelayasmallchatelainepurse。Aftershehadeatenhericesheopenedthepurseandtookoutaone—dollarbill。

  \"Mr。Farrington,\"shesaid,withthesmilethathadwontheHotelLotus,\"Iwanttotellyousome—

  thing。I’mgoingtoleavebeforebreakfastinthemorning,becauseI’vegottogobacktomywork。

  I’mbehindthehosierycounteratCasey’sMammothStore,andmyvacation’supateighto’clockto—

  morrow。Thatpaper—dollaristhelastcentI’llseetillIdrawmyeightdollarssalarynextSaturdaynight。You’rearealgentleman,andyou’vebeengoodtome,andIwantedtotellyoubeforeIwent。

  I’vebeensavingupoutofmywagesforayearjustforthisvacation。IwantedtospendoneweeklikealadyifIneverdoanotherone。IwantedtogetupwhenIpleaseinsteadofhavingtocrawloutatseveneverymorning;andIwantedtoliveonthebestandbewaitedonandringbellsforthingsjustlikerichfolksdo。NowI’vedoneit,andI’vehadthehappiesttimeIeverexpecttohaveinmylife。I’mgoingbacktomyworkandmylittlehallbedroomsatisfiedforanotheryear。Iwantedtotellyouaboutit,Mr。Farrington,becauseI——Ithoughtyoukindoflikedme,andI——Ilikedyou。But,oh,I

  couldn’thelpdeceivingyouuptillnow,foritwasalljustlikeafairytaletome。SoItalkedaboutEu—

  ropeandthethingsI’vereadaboutinothercountries,andmadeyouthinkIwasagreatlady。

  \"ThisdressI’vegoton——it’stheonlyoneIhavethat’sfittowear——IboughtfromO’Dowd&Levin—

  skyontheinstalmentplan。\"

  \"Seventy—fivedollarsistheprice,anditwasmadetomeasure。Ipaid$10down,andthey’retocollect$1aweektillit’spaidfor。That’llbeaboutallI

  havetosay,Mr。Farrington,exceptthatmynameisMamieSiviterinsteadofMadameBeaumont,andI

  thankyouforyourattentions。Thisdollarwillpaytheinstalmentdueonthedressto—morrow。IguessI’llgouptomyroomnow。\"

  HaroldFarringtonlistenedtotherecitaloftheLotus’sloveliestguestwithanimpassivecountenance。

  Whenshehadconcludedhedrewasmallbooklikeacheckbookfromhiscoatpocket。Hewroteuponablankforminthiswithastubofpencil,toreouttheleaf,tosseditovertohiscompanionandtookupthepaperdollar。

  \"I’vegottogotowork,too,inthemorning,\"hesaid,\"andImightaswellbeginnow。There’sareceiptforthedollarinstalment。I’vebeenacol—

  lectorforO’Dowd&Levinskyforthreeyears。

  Funny,ain’tit,thatyouandmebothhadthesameideaaboutspendingourvacation?I’vealwayswantedtoputupataswellhotel,andIsavedupoutofmytwentyper,anddidit。Say,Mame,howaboutatriptoConeySaturdaynightontheboatwhat?\"

  ThefaceofthepseudoMadameHeloiseD’ArcyBeaumontbeamed。

  \"Oh,youbetI’llgo,Mr。Farrington。ThestoreclosesattwelveonSaturdays。IguessConey’llbeallrightevenifwedidspendaweekwiththeswells。\"

  BelowthebalconytheswelteringcitygrowledandbuzzedintheJulynight。InsidetheHotelLotusthetempered,coolshadowsreigned,andthesolicitouswaitersingle—footednearthelowwindows,readyatanodtoserveMadameandherescort。

  AtthedooroftheelevatorFarringtontookhisleave,andMadameBeaumontmadeherlastascent。

  Butbeforetheyreachedthenoiselesscagebesaid:

  \"Justforgetthat’HaroldFarrington,’willyou?

  McManusisthename——JamesMcManus。SomecallmeJimmy。\"

  \"Good—night,Jimmy,\"saidMadame。

  THERATHSKELLERANDTHEROSE

  MissPosieCarringtonhadearnedhersuc—

  cess。Shebeganlifehandicappedbythefamilynameof\"Boggs,\"inthesmalltownknownasCranberryCorners。Attheageofeighteenshehadacquiredthenameof\"Carrington\"andapositioninthechorusofametropolitanburlesquecompany。

  Thenceupwardshehadascendedbythelegitimateanddelectablestepsof\"broiler,\"memberofthefamous\"Dickey—bird\"octette,inthesuccessfulmusicalcomedy,\"FudgeandFellows,\"leaderofthepotato—

  bugdancein\"Fol—de—Rol,\"andatlengthtothepartofthemaid\"’Toinette\"in\"TheKing’sBath—Robe,\"

  whichcapturedthecriticsandgaveherherchance。

  AndwhenwecometoconsiderMissCarringtonsheisintheheydeyofflattery,fameandfizz;andthatastutemanager,HerrTimothyGoldstein,hashersignaturetoiron—cladpapersthatshewillstarthecomingseasoninDydeRich’snewplay,\"ParesisbyGaslight。\"

  PromptlytherecametoHerrTimothyacapabletwentieth—centuryyoungcharacteractorbythenameofHighsmith,whobesoughtengagementas\"SolHaytosser,\"thecomicandchiefmalecharacterpartin\"ParesisbyGaslight。\"

  \"Myboy,\"saidGoldstein,\"takethepartifyoucangetit。MissCarringtonwon’tlistentoanyofmysuggestions。Shehasturneddownhalfadozenofthebestimitatorsoftheruraldubinthecity。

  Shedeclaresshewon’tsetafootonthestageun—

  less’Haytosser’isthebestthatcanberakedup——

  Shewasraisedinavillage,youknow,andwhenaBroadwayorchidsticksastrawinhishairandtriestocallhimselfacloverblossomshe’son,allright。

  Iaskedher,inasarcasticvein,ifshethoughtDen—

  manThompsonwouldmakeanykindofashowinthepart。’Oh,no,’saysshe。’Idon’twanthimorJohnDreworJimCorbettoranyoftheseswellactorsthatdon’tknowaturnipfromaturnstile。I

  wanttherealarticle。’So,myboy,ifyouwanttoplayI’SolHaytosser’youwillhavetoconvinceMissCarrington。Luckbewithyou。\"

  HighsmithtookthetrainthenextdayforCran—

  berryCorners。Heremainedinthatforsakenandinanimatevillagethreedays。HefoundtheBoggsfamilyandcorkscrewedtheirhistoryuntothethirdandfourthgeneration。HeamassedthefactsandthelocalcolorofCranberryCorners。ThevillagehadnotgrownasrapidlyashadMissCarrington。TheactorestimatedthatithadsufferedasfewactualchangessincethedepartureofitssolitaryfollowerofThespisashadastageuponwhich\"fouryearsissupposedtohaveelapsed。\"HeabsorbedCran—

  berryCornersandreturnedtothecityofchameleonchanges。

  ItwasintherathskellerthatHighsmithmadethehitofhishistrioniccareer。Thereisnoneedtonametheplace;thereisbutonerathskellerwhereyoucouldhopetofindMissPosieCarringtonafteraperformanceof\"TheKing’sBath—Robe。\"

  Therewasajollysmallpartyatoneofthetablesthatdrewmanyeyes。MissCarrington,petite,mar—

  vellous,bubbling,electric,fame—drunken,shallbenamedfirst。HerrGoldsteinfollows,sonorous,curly—

  haired,heavy,atrifleanxious,assomebearthathadcaught,somehow,abutterflyinhisclaws。Next,amancondemnedtoanewspaper,sad,courted,armed,analyzingforpressagent’sdrosseverysen—

  tencethatwaspouredoverhim,eatinghisalaNew—

  burginthesilenceofgreatness。Toconclude,ayouthwithpartedhair,anamethatisochretoredjournalsandgoldonthebackofasuppercheck。

  Thesesatatatablewhilethemusiciansplayed,whilewaitersmovedinthemazyperformanceoftheirdutieswiththeirbackstowardallwhodesiredtheirservice,andallwasbizarreandmerrybecauseitwasninefeetbelowthelevelofthesidewalk。

  At11。45abeingenteredtherathskeller。ThefirstviolinperceptiblyflattedaCthatshouldhavebeennatural;theclarionetblewabubbleinsteadofagracenote;MissCarringtongiggledandtheyouthwithpartedhairswallowedanoliveseed。

  Exquisitelyandirreproachablyruralwasthenewentry。Alank,disconcerted,hesitatingyoungmanitwas,flaxen—haired,gapingofmouth,awkward,strickentomiserybythelightsandcompany。Hisclothingwasbutternut,withbrightbluetie,showingfourinchesofbonywristandwhite—sockedankle。

  Heupsetachair,satinanotherone,curledafootaroundatablelegandcringedattheapproachofawaiter。

  \"Youmayfetchmeaglassoflagerbeer,\"hesaid,inresponsetothediscreetquestioningoftheservitor。

  Theeyesoftherathskellerwereuponhim。Hewasasfreshasacollardandasingenuousasahayrake。

  Helethiseyeroveabouttheplaceasonewhore—

  gards,big—eyed,hogsinthepotatopatch。HisgazerestedatlengthuponMissCarrington。Heroseandwenttohertablewithalateral,shiningsmileandablushofpleasedtrepidation。

  \"How’reye,MissPosie?\"hesaidinaccentsnottobedoubted。\"Don’tyerememberme—BillSum—

  mers—theSummersesthatlivedbackoftheblack—

  smithshop?IreckonI’vegrowedupsomesinceyeleftCranberryCorners。

  \"’LizaPerry’lowedImightseeyeinthecitywhileIwashere。Youknow’LizamarriedBennyStanfield,andshesays——\"

  \"Ah,say!\"interruptedMissCarrington,brightly,\"LizePerryisnevermarried—what!Oh,thefrecklesofher!\"

  \"MarriedinJune,\"grinnedthegossip,\"andlivin’

  intheoldTatumPlace。HamRileyperfessedreli—

  gion;oldMrs。BlitherssoldherplacetoCap’nSpooner;theyoungestWatersgirlrunawaywithamusicteacher;thecourt—houseburneduplastMarch;

  youruncleWileywaselectedconstable;MatildaHos—

  kinsdiedfromrunnin’aneedleinherhand,andTomBeedleiscourtin’SallieLathrop—theysayhedon’tmissanightbutwhathe’ssettin’ontheirporch。\"

  \"Thewall—eyedthing!\"exclaimedMissCarring—

  ton,withasperity。\"Why,TomBeedleonce——say,youfolks,excusemeawhile——thisisanoldfriendofmine——Mr。——whatwasit?Yes,Mr。Summers——Mr。Goldstein,Mr。Ricketts,Mr。——Oh,what’syours?’Johnny’’lldo——comeonoverhereandtellmesomemore。\"

  Sheswepthimtoanisolatedtableinacorner。

  HerrGoldsteinshruggedhisfatshouldersandbeck—

  onedtothewaiter。Thenewspapermanbrightenedalittleandmentionedabsinthe。Theyouthwithpartedhairwasplungedintomelancholy。Theguestsoftherathskellerlaughed,clinkedglassesandenjoyedthecomedythatPosieCarringtonwastreat—

  ingthemtoafterherregularperformance。Afewcynicaloneswhispered\"pressagent\"’andsmiledwisely。

  PosieCarringtonlaidherdimpledanddesirablechinuponherhands,andforgotheraudience——afacultythathadwonherlaurelsforher。

  \"Idon’tseemtorecollectanyBillSummers,\"shesaid,thoughtfullygazingstraightintotheinnocentblueeyesoftherusticyoungman。\"ButIknowtheSummerses,allright。Iguessthereain’tmanychangesintheoldtown。Youseeanyofmyfolkslately?\"

  AndthenHighsmithplayedhistrump。Thepartof\"SolHaytosser\"calledforpathosaswellascomedy。MissCarringtonshouldseethathecoulddothataswell。

  \"MissPosie,\"said\"BillSummers,\"\"Iwasuptoyourfolkeseshousejisttwoorthreedaysago。No,thereain’tmanychangestospeakof。Thelilacbushbythekitchenwindowisoverafoothigher,andtheelminthefrontyarddiedandhadtobecutdown。

  Andyetitdon’tseemthesameplacethatitusedtobe。\"

  \"How’sma?\"askedMissCarrington。

  \"Shewassettin’bythefrontdoor,crochetingalamp—matwhenIsawherlast,\"said\"Bill。\"\"She’solder’nshewas,MissPosie。Buteverythinginthehouselookedjestthesame。Yourmaaskedmetosetdown。’Don’ttouchthatwillowrocker,William,\"

  saysshe。’Itain’tbeenmovedsincePosieleft;andthat’stheapronshewashemmin’,layin’overthearmofit,jistassheflungit。I’minhopes,’shegoeson,thatPosie’llfinishrunnin’outthathemsomeday。’\"

  MissCarringtonbeckonedperemptorilytoawaiter。

  \"Apintofextradry,\"sheordered,briefly;\"andgivethechecktoGoldstein。\"

  \"Thesunwasshinin’inthedoor,\"wentonthechroniclerfromCranberry,\"andyourmawassettin’

  rightinit。Iaskedherifshehadn’tbettermovebackalittle。’William,’saysshe,’whenIgetsotdownandlookin’downtheroad,Ican’tbeartomove。

  Neveraday,’saysshe,’butwhatIsethereeveryminutethatIcanspareandwatchoverthempalin’sforPosie。Shewentawaydownthatroadinthenight,forweseenherlittleshoetracksinthedust,andsomethin’tellsmeshe’llcomebackthatwayag’inwhenshe’swearyoftheworldandbeginstothinkaboutheroldmother。\"

  \"WhenIwascomin’away,\"concluded\"Bill,\"

  \"Ipulledthisoff’nthebushbythefrontsteps。I

  thoughtmaybeImightseeyouinthecity,andI

  knowedyou’dlikesomethin’fromtheoldhome。\"

  Hetookfromhiscoatpocketarose—adrooping,yellow,velvet,odorousrose,thathungitsbeadinthefoulatmosphereofthattaintedrathskellerlikeavirginbowingbeforethehotbreathofthelionsinaRomanarena。

  MissCarrington’spenetratingbutmusicallaughroseabovetheorcbestra’srenderingof\"Bluebells。\"

  \"Oh,say!\"shecried,withglee,\"ain’tthosepokyplacesthelimit?IjustknowthattwohoursatCranberryCornerswouldgivemethehorrorsnow。

  Well,I’mawfulgladtohaveseenyou,Mr。Summers。

  GuessI’llbustlearoundtothehotelnowandgetmybeautysleep。\"

  Shethrusttheyellowroseintothebosomofherwonderful,dainty,silkengarments,stoodupandnoddedimperiouslyatHerrGoldstein。

  Herthreecompanionsand\"BillSummers\"at—

  tendedhertohercab。Whenherflouncesandstreamerswereallsafelytuckedinsideshedazzledthemwithaurevoirsfromhershiningeyesandteeth。

  \"Comearoundtothehotelandseeme,Bill,beforeyouleavethecity,\"shecalledastheglitteringcabrolledaway。

  Highsmith,stillinhismake—up,wentwithHerrGoldsteintoacafebooth。

  \"Brightidea,eh?\"askedthesmilingactor。

  \"Oughttoland’SolHaytosser’forme,don’tyouthink?Thelittleladyneveroncetumbled。\"

  \"Ididn’tbearyourconversation,\"saidGoldstein,butyourmake—upandactingwas0。K。Here’stoyoursuccess。You’dbettercallonMissCarringtonearlyto—morrowandstrikeherforthepart。Idon’tseehowshecankeepfrombeingsatisfiedwithyourexhibitionofability。\"

  At11。45A。M。onthenextdayHighsmith,hand—

  some,dressedinthelatestmode,confident,withafuchsiainhisbutton—bole,sentuphiscardtoMissCarringtoninherselectapartmenthotel。

  Hewasshownupandreceivedbytheactress’sFrenchmaid。

  \"Iamsorree,\"saidMlle。Hortense,\"butIamtosaythistoall。Itiswithgreatregret。MeesCar—

  ringtonhavecancelledallengagementsonthestageandhavereturnedtoliveinthathowyoucallthattown?CranberryCornaire!\"

  THECLARIONCALL

  HalfofthisstorycanbefoundintherecordsofthePoliceDepartment;theotherhalfbelongbehindthebusinesscounterofanewspaperoffice。

  OneafternoontwoweeksafterMillionaireNor—

  crosswasfoundinhisapartmentmurderedbyabur—

  glar,themurderer,whilestrollingserenelydownBroadwayranplumpagainstDetectiveBarneyWoods。

  \"Isthatyou,JohnnyKernan?\"askedWoods,whohadbeennear—sightedinpublicforfiveyears。

  \"Noless,\"criedKernan,heartily。\"Ifitisn’tBarneyWoods,lateandearlyofoldSaintJo!

  You’llhavetoshowme!WhatareyoudoingEast?

  Dothegreen—goodscircularsgetoutthatfar?\"

  saidWoods。

  \"I’vebeeninNewYorksomeyears,I’monthecitydetectiveforce。\"

  \"Well,well!\"saidKernan,breathingsmilingjoyandpattingthedetective’sarm。

  \"ComeintoMuller’s,\"saidWoods,\"andlet’shuntaquiettable。I’dliketotalktoyouawhile。\"

  Itlackedafewminutestothehouroffour。Thetidesoftradewerenotyetloosed,andtheyfoundaquietcornerofthecafe。Kernan,welldressedSlightlyswaggering,self—confident,seatedhimselfop—

  positethelittledetective,withhispale,sandymus—

  tache,squintingeyesandready—madecheviotsuit。

  \"Whatbusinessareyouinnow?\"askedWoods。

  \"YouknowyouleftSaintJoayearbeforeIdid。\"

  \"I’msellingsharesinacoppermine,\"saidKer—

  nan。\"Imayestablishanofficehere。Well,well!

  andsooldBarneyisaNewYorkdetective。Youalwayshadaturnthatway。Youwereonthepo—

  liceinSaintJoafterIleftthere,weren’tyou?\"

  \"Sixmonths,\"saidWoods。\"Andnowthere’sonemorequestion,Johnny。I’vefollowedyourrecordprettycloseeversinceyoudidthathoteljobinSara—

  toga,andIneverknewyoutouseyourgunbefore。

  WhydidyoukillNorcross?\"

  Kernanstaredforafewmomentswithconcen—

  tratedattentionatthesliceoflemoninhishigh—ball;

  andthenbelookedatthedetectivewithasudden,crooked,brilliantsmile。

  \"Howdidyouguessit,Barney?\"heasked,ad—

  miringly。\"IswearIthoughtthejobwasascleanandassmoothasapeeledonion。DidIleaveastringhangingoutanywhere?\"

  Woodslaiduponthetableasmallgoldpencilin—

  tendedforawatch—charm。

  \"It’stheoneIgaveyouthelastChristmaswewereinSaintJo。I’vegotyourshavingmugyet。

  IfoundthisunderacorneroftheruginNorcross’sroom。Iwarnyoutobecarefulwhatyousay。I’vegotitputontoyou,Johnny。Wewereoldfriendsonce,butImustdomyduty。You’llhavetogotothechairforNorcross。\"Kernanlaughed。

  \"Myluckstayswithme,\"saidbe。\"Who’dhavethoughtoldBarneywasonmytrail!\"Heslippedonehandinsidehiscoat。InaninstantWoodshadarevolveragainsthisside。

  \"Putitaway,\"saidKernan,wrinklinghisnose。

  \"I’monlyinvestigating。Aha!Ittakesninetailorstomakeaman,butonecandoamanup。There’saholeinthatvestpocket。Itookthatpenciloffmychainandslippeditinthereincaseofascrap。Putupyourgun,Barney,andI’lltellyouwhyIhadtoshootNorcross。Theoldfoolstarteddownthehallafterme,poppingatthebuttonsonthebackofmycoatwithapeevishlittle。22andIhadtostophim。Theoldladywasadarling。Shejustlayinbedandsawher$12,000diamondnecklacegowith—

  outachirp,whileshebeggedlikeapanhandlertohavebackalittlethingoldringwithagarnetworthabout$3。1guessshemarriedoldNorcrossforhismoney,allright。Don’ttheyhangontothelittletrinketsfromtheManWhoLostOut,though?

  Thereweresixrings,twobroochesandachatelainewatch。Fifteenthousandwouldcoverthelot。\"

  \"Iwarnedyounottotalk,\"saidWoods。

  \"Oh,that’sallright,\"saidKernan。\"Thestuffisinmysuitcaseatthehotel。AndnowI’lltellyouwhyI’mtalking。Becauseit’ssafe。I’mtalkingtoamanIknow。Youowemeathousanddollars,Bar—

  neyWoods,andevenifyouwantedtoarrestmeyourhandwouldn’tmakethemove。\"

  \"Ihaven’tforgotten,\"saidWoods。\"Youcountedouttwentyfiftieswithoutaword。I’llpayitbacksomeday。Thatthousandsavedmeand——well,theywerepilingmyfurnitureoutonthesidewalkwhenI

  gotbacktothehouse。\"

  \"Andso,\"continuedKernan,\"youbeingBarneyWoods,bornastrueassteel,andboundtoplayawhiteman’sgame,can’tliftafingertoarrestthemanyou’reindebtedto。Oh,IhavetostudymenaswellasYalelocksandwindowfasteningsinmybusiness。Now,keepquietwhileIringforthewaiter。I’vehadathirstforayearortwothatwor—

  riesmealittle。IfI’mevercaughttheluckysleuthwillhavetodividehonorswitholdboyBooze。ButI

  neverdrinkduringbusinesshours。AfterajobI

  cancrookelbowswithmyoldfriendBarneywithaclearconscience。Whatareyoutaking?\"

  Thewaitercamewiththelittledecantersandthesiphonandleftthemaloneagain。

  \"You’vecalledtheturn,\"saidWoods,asherolledthelittlegoldpencilaboutwithathoughtfulfore—

  finger。I’vegottopassyouup。Ican’tlayahandonyou。IfI’da—paidthatmoneyback——butIdidn’t,andthatsettlesit。It’sabadbreakI’mmaking,Johnny,butIcan’tdodgeit。Youhelpedmeonce,anditcallsforthesame。\"

  \"Iknewit,\"saidKernan,raisinghisglass,withaflushedsmileofself—appreciation。\"Icanjudgemen。Here’stoBarney,for——’he’sajollygoodfellow。’\"

  \"Idon’tbelieve,\"wentonWoodsquietly,asifbewerethinkingaloud,\"thatifaccountshadbeensquarebetweenyouandme,allthemoneyinallthebanksinNewYorkcouldhaveboughtyououtofmyhandsto—night。\"

  \"Iknowitcouldn’t,\"saidKernan。\"That’swhyIknewIwassafewithyou。\"

  \"Mostpeople,\"continuedthedetective,\"lookside—

  waysatmybusiness。Theydon’tclassitamongthefineartsandtheprofessions。ButI’vealwaystakenakindoffoolprideinit。AndhereiswhereIgo’busted。’IguessI’mamanfirstandadetectiveafterward。I’vegottoletyougo,andthenI’vegottoresignfromtheforce。IguessIcandriveanex—

  presswagon。Yourthousanddollarsisfurtheroffthanever,Johnny。\"

  \"Oh,you’rewelcometoit,\"saidKernan,withalordlyair。\"I’dbewillingtocallthedebtoff,butIknowyouwouldn’thaveitItwasaluckydayformewhenyouborrowedit。Andnow,let’sdropthesubject。I’mofftotheWestonamorningtrain。

  IknowaplaceouttherewhereIcannegotiatetheNorcrosssparks。Drinkup,Barney,andforgetyourtroubles。We’llhaveajollytimewhilethepoliceareknockingtheirheadstogetheroverthecase。

  I’vegotoneofmySaharathirstsonto—night。ButI’minthebands——theunofficialbands——ofmyoldfriendBarney,andIwon’tevendreamofacop。\"

  Andthen,asKernan’sreadyfingerkeptthebut—

  tonandthewaiterworking,hisweakpoint——atre—

  mendousvanityandarrogantegotism,begantoshowitself。Herecountedstoryafterstoryofhissuc—

  cessfulplunderings,ingeniousplotsandinfamoustransgressionsuntilWoods,withallhisfamiliaritywithevil—doers,feltgrowingwithinhimacoldab—

  horrencetowardtheutterlyviciousmanwhohadoncebeenhisbenefactor。

  \"I’mdisposedof,ofcourse,\"saidWoods,atlength。\"ButIadviseyoutokeepundercoverforaspell。ThenewspapersmaytakeupthisNorcrossaffair。Therehasbeenanepidemicofburglariesandmanslaughterintownthissummer。\"

  ThewordsentKernanintoahighglowofsullenandvindictiverage。

  \"Tohellwiththenewspapers,\"hegrowled。

  \"Whatdotheyspellbutbragandblowandboodleinbox—carletters?Supposetheydotakeupacasewhatdoesitamountto?Thepoliceareeasyenoughtofool;butwhatdothenewspapersdo?Theysendalotofpin—headreportersaroundtothescene;andtheymakeforthenearestsaloonandhavebeerwhiletheytakephotosofthebartender’soldestdaughterineveningdress,toprintasthefianceeoftheyoungmaninthetenthstory,whothoughtheheardanoisebelowonthenightofthemurder。That’saboutasnearasthenewspapersevercometorunningdownMr。Burglar。\"

  \"Well,Idon’tknow,\"saidWoods,reflecting。

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