Shepitiedhim——yes；butnowshecouldsparelittlepityforothers，sheneededasmuchherself。Forminutebyminute，asshesattherethinkingoutthisgreatproblemjustasthelittleMary-’Gustausedtothinkouthersmallones，herdutybecameclearandmorecleartohermind。EdgarFarmer’ssecretmustbekept。ForCrawford’ssakeitmustbe。Heneednot——hemustnot——learnthatthefatherhehadhonoredandrespectedallhislifewasunworthyofthathonorandrespect。Andheruncles——theymustnotknow。Theoldskeletonmustnotbedugfromitsgrave。HerUncleZoethhadtoldheronlyalittlewhilebeforethathewaslearningtoforget，orifnottoforgetatleasttobemorereconciled。Shedidnotunderstandhimthen；nowshedid。TohavehimlearnthatEdgarFarmerwasalive，thathisson——Oh，no，hemustnotlearnit！Illashewas，andweakashewaslikelytobealways，theshockmightkillhim。Andyetsoonerorlaterhewouldlearnunlessthesecretremained，asithadbeenforyears，undisclosed。
Andtokeepitstillasecretwas，shesawclearly，herduty。Shemightrebelagainstit，shemightfeelthatitwaswickedandcruel，thespoilingofherlifetosavetheseothers，butitwasherdutynevertheless。BecauseshelovedCrawford——andshewasrealizingnowthatshedidlovehimdearly，thattherecouldneverbeanotherloveintheworldforher——shemustsendhimaway，shemustendtheaffairatonce。Ifshedidthatshecouldsavehimfromlearningofhisfather’sdisgrace，couldaverttheotherwiseinevitablequarrelbetweenthem，couldmakehiscareerandhisfuturesecure。Andheruncleswouldbehappy，theskeletonwouldremainundisturbed。
Yes，shemustdoit。Butitwassohardtodo。Philosophydidnothelpintheleast。Shehadtriedtoconvinceherselfwhenshegaveupherschoolworkthatitmeanttheendofherromancealso。ShehadtriedtotellCrawfordso。Butshehadbeenweak，shehadpermittedherselftohope。Shehadrealizedthatforthepresent，perhapsforyears，shemustworkforandwiththeoldmenwhohadbeenfatherandmotherbothtoher，but——hehadsaidso——Crawfordwouldwaitforher，andsomeday——perhaps——
Butnowtherewasnoperhaps——nowsheknew。Shemustreceivenomorelettersfromhim。Shemustneverseehimagain。Thebreakmustbeabsoluteandfinal。Andtherewasbutonewaytobringthatabout。Hehadsaidrepeatedlythatonlyherdeclarationthatshedidnotlovehimwouldeverpreventhismarryingher。Verywell，thenforhissakeshemustlietohim；shemusttellhimthatverything。Shemustwritehimthatshehadbeenconsideringthematterandhaddecidedshecouldneverlovehimenoughtobecomehiswife。
Itwasalmosttwoo’clockwhenshereachedthisdecisionbutshesatdownatherdesktowritethenandtherethelettercontainingit，thelastlettershewouldeverwritehim。Andwhenthemorninglightcamestreaminginatthewindowsshestillsatthere，theletterunwritten。Shehadmademanybeginnings，butnotanend。
Shemusttryagain；shewastootired，toonervous，toohopelessandheartbrokentomakeanotherattemptthatmorning，butbeforethedaywasoveritshouldbedone。Shethrewherselfdownuponthebedbutshecouldnotsleep。Whyhadshebeenselectedtobearthisburden？
WhathadshedonethatGodshoulddelighttotortureherinthisway？
CHAPTERXXV
Thatdifficultletterwasneverwritten。Intheafternoon，businessatthestorebeingratherquietandMrs。Atkins，thenurse，desiringanhour’sleavetodoanerrandinthevillage，Maryhadtakenherplaceinthesickroom。Zoethwasimprovingslowly，sothedoctorsaid，buthetookverylittleinterestinwhatwenton，speakingbutseldom，askingfewquestions，andseemingtobebutpartiallysensibleofhissurroundings。Bestnottotrytorousehim，thephysiciansaid。Littlebylittlehewouldgainmentallyaswellasphysicallyand，byandby，therewasreasontohope，wouldbeupandaboutagain。Probably，however，hewouldneverbesostrongashehadbeenbeforehissuddenseizure，thecauseofwhich——iftherehadbeenadefinitecause——wasstillunknown。
JustthenhewasasleepandMary，sittingintherocking-chairbythebed，wasthinking，thinking，thinking。Ifshecouldonlystopthinkingforalittlewhile！UncleZoeth，thereonthebed，lookedsocalmandpeaceful。Ifonlyshemighthaverestandpeaceagain！
Ifshemightbeallowedtoforget！
ThedooropenedgentlyandMr。Chaseappeared。Hebeckonedtohertocomeout。Withaglanceatthepatient，shetiptoedfromtheroomintothehall。
“Whatisit，Isaiah？“sheasked。
Isaiahseemedtobeexcitedaboutsomething。
“I’vegotasurpriseforyou，Mary-’Gusta，“hewhispered。“There’ssomebodydownstairstoseeyou。“
HismannerwassoimportantandmysteriousthatMarywaspuzzled。
“Someonetoseeme？“sherepeated。“Whoisit？“
Mr。Chasewinked。
“It’ssomebodyyouwan’texpectin’tosee，Ibetyou！“hedeclared。
“IknowIwan’t。WhenIopenedthedoorandseehimstandin’thereI——“
“Sawhim？Who？Whoisit，Isaiah？Stopthatridiculouswinkingthisinstant。Whoisit？“
“It’sthatyoungCrawfordSmithfellerfromwayoutWest，that’swho’tis。Ah，ha！Itoldyouyou’dbesurprised。“
Shewassurprised，therecouldbenodoubtofthat。Foramomentshestoodperfectlystill。HaditnotbeenthatthehallwasalmostdarkintheshadowsofthelateafternoonIsaiahwouldhavenoticedhowpaleshehadbecome。Butitwasevidentthathedidnotnoticeit，forhechuckled。
“Itoldyouyou’dbesomesurprised，“hecrowed。“Well，ain’tyoucomin’ondowntoseehim？SeemstomeifIhadabeau——excuseme，agentlemanfriend——whocomea-cruisin’allthewayfromt’othersideofcreationtoseemeIwouldn’tkeephimwaitin’verylong。
Ho！ho！“
Marydidnotansweratonce。Whenshedidshewassurprisedtofindthatshewasabletospeaksocalmly。
“Ishallbedowninamoment，“shesaid。“Isaiah，willyoupleasegoinandstaywithUncleZoethuntilIcome？“
Isaiahlookedchagrinedanddisappointed。VisitorsfromthefarWestwererareandespeciallyrarewasayounggentlemanwhoMr。
Chase，withwhatCaptainShadrachtermedhis“lovesickimagination，“
surmisedwasMary-’Gusta’sbeau。Hewishedtoseemoreofhim。
“Aw，say，Mary-’Gusta，“hepleaded，“I’mawfulbusy。Idon’tseehowIcansetalongofZoeth——Say，Mary’Gusta！“
ButMaryhadgone。Shewashurryingalongthehalltowardherownroom。SoIsaiah，rememberingthatthedoctorhadsaidMr。Hamiltonmustnotbeleftalone，grumblinglyobeyedordersandwentintositbesidehim。
InherownroomMarystood，whiteandshaken，strivingtoregainhercomposure。Shemustregainit，shemustbecoolandcalminordertogothroughtheordealsheknewwasbeforeher。Hiscomingcouldmeanbutonething：hisfatherhadstillrefusedconsentandhehadcometotellhersoandtobeghertowaitforhiminspiteofit。
Ifonlyhehadwrittensayinghewascoming，ifshehadbeenforewarned，thenshemighthavebeenmoreready，moreprepared。Nowshemustsummonallherresolutionandbefirmandunwavering。Herpurposewasassetandstrongasever，butah，itwouldbesohardtotellhim！Towritethelettershehadmeanttowritewouldhavebeeneasycomparedtothis。However，itmustbedone——anddonenow。
Shewentdownthestairsandenteredthesitting-room。
Hewassittingintherockerbythewindowandwhenshecameintotheroomhesprangtohisfeetandcametowardher。Hisface，orsoitseemedtoher，showedsometracesofthetroubleandanxietythroughwhichhehadpassedsorecently。Hewasalittlethinnerandhelookedlessboyish。Heheldouthishands。
“Well，Mary，“hecried，eagerly，“hereIam。Aren’tyougladtoseeme？“
Heseizedbothherhandsinhis。Shedisengagedthemgently。Hermannerseemedoddtohimandheregardedherinapuzzledway。
“AREN’Tyouglad？“herepeated。“Why，Mary，whatisthematter？“
Shesmiledsadlyandshookherhead。“Oh，Crawford，“shesaid，“whydidyoucome？Or，atleast，whydidn’tyouwritemeyouwerecoming？“
Helaughed。“Ididn’twrite，“heanswered，“becauseIwasafraidifIdidyouwouldwritemenottocome。“
“Icertainlyshould。“
“Ofcourseyouwould。SoItooknochancesbutjustcameinstead。“
“Butwhydidyoucome？“
“Why？Toseeyou，ofcourse。“
“Oh，Crawford，pleasedon’tjoke。YouknowIaskedyounottocomehere。Whenwelastspoketogether，overthetelephone，ItoldyouthatifyoucamehereIshouldnotseeyou。Andyetyoucame。“
Hismannerchanged。Hewasseriousenoughnow。
“Icame，“hesaid，“because——well，becauseIfeltthatImust。I
hadmanythingstotellyou，Mary，andsomethingtoask。AndI
couldneithertellnoraskinaletter。DadandIhavequarreled——
we’vepartedcompany。“
Shehadexpectedtohearit，butitshockedandgrievedher，nevertheless。Sheknewhowhehadlovedhisfather。