第39章
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  Ididallamancoulddotoreclaimher。Quiteuseless!ShehadneverreallyreturnedtheloveIfeltforher:Ihadnoinfluence;

  Icoulddonothing。Mymother,hearingofthislastworsetrouble,resolvedtotrywhatherinfluencecoulddo。Illasshewas,I

  foundheronedaydressedtogoout。

  “Iamnotlongforthisworld,Francis,“shesaid。“Ishallnotfeeleasyonmydeathbed,unlessIhavedonemybesttothelasttomakeyouhappy。Imeantoputmyownfearsandmyownfeelingsoutofthequestion,andgowithyoutoyourwife,andtrywhatIcandotoreclaimher。Takemehomewithyou,Francis。LetmedoallIcantohelpmyson,beforeitistoolate。“

  HowcouldIdisobeyher?Wetooktherailwaytothetown:itwasonlyhalfanhour’sride。Byoneo’clockintheafternoonwereachedmyhouse。Itwasourdinnerhour,andAliciawasinthekitchen。Iwasabletotakemymotherquietlyintotheparlorandthentopreparemywifeforthevisit。Shehaddrunkbutlittleatthatearlyhour;and,luckily,thedevilinherwastamedforthetime。

  Shefollowedmeintotheparlor,andthemeetingpassedoffbetterthanIhadventuredtoforecast;withthisonedrawback,thatmymother——thoughshetriedhardtocontrolherself——shrankfromlookingmywifeinthefacewhenshespoketoher。ItwasarelieftomewhenAliciabegantopreparethetablefordinner。

  Shelaidthecloth,broughtinthebreadtray,andcutsomeslicesforusfromtheloaf。Thenshereturnedtothekitchen。Atthatmoment,whileIwasstillanxiouslywatchingmymother,IwasstartledbyseeingthesameghastlychangepassoverherfacewhichhadaltereditinthemorningwhenAliciaandshefirstmet。

  BeforeIcouldsayaword,shestartedupwithalookofhorror。

  “Takemeback!——home,homeagain,Francis!Comewithme,andnevergobackmore!“

  Iwasafraidtoaskforanexplanation;Icouldonlysignhertobesilent,andhelpherquicklytothedoor。Aswepassedthebreadtrayonthetable,shestoppedandpointedtoit。

  “Didyouseewhatyourwifecutyourbreadwith?“sheasked。

  “No,mother;Iwasnotnoticing。Whatwasit?“

  “Look!“

  Ididlook。Anewclaspknife,withabuckhornhandle,laywiththeloafinthebreadtray。Istretchedoutmyhandtopossessmyselfofit。Atthesamemoment,therewasanoiseinthekitchen,andmymothercaughtmebythearm。

  “TheknifeoftheDream!Francis,I’mfaintwithfear——takemeawaybeforeshecomesback!“

  Icouldn’tspeaktocomfortoreventoanswerher。SuperiorasI

  wastosuperstition,thediscoveryoftheknifestaggeredme。Insilence,Ihelpedmymotheroutofthehouse;andtookherhome。

  Iheldoutmyhandtosaygood-by。Shetriedtostopme。

  “Don’tgoback,Francis!don’tgoback!“

  “Imustgettheknife,mother。Imustgobackbythenexttrain。“

  Iheldtothatresolution。BythenexttrainIwentback。

  Mywifehad,ofcourse,discoveredoursecretdeparturefromthehouse。Shehadbeendrinking。Shewasinafuryofpassion。Thedinnerinthekitchenwasflungunderthegrate;theclothwasofftheparlortable。Wherewastheknife?

  Iwasfoolishenoughtoaskforit。Sherefusedtogiveittome。

  Inthecourseofthedisputebetweenuswhichfollowed,I

  discoveredthattherewasahorriblestoryattachedtotheknife。

  Ithadbeenusedinamurder——yearssince——andhadbeensoskillfullyhiddenthattheauthoritieshadbeenunabletoproduceitatthetrial。Byhelpofsomeofherdisreputablefriends,mywifehadbeenabletopurchasethisrelicofabygonecrime。Herpervertednaturesetsomehorridunacknowledgedvalueontheknife。

  Seeingtherewasnohopeofgettingitbyfairmeans,Ideterminedtosearchforit,laterintheday,insecret。Thesearchwasunsuccessful。Nightcameon,andIleftthehousetowalkaboutthestreets。YouwillunderstandwhatabrokenmanIwasbythistime,whenItellyouIwasafraidtosleepinthesameroomwithher!

  Threeweekspassed。Stillsherefusedtogiveuptheknife;andstillthatfearofsleepinginthesameroomwithherpossessedme。

  Iwalkedaboutatnight,ordozedintheparlor,orsatwatchingbymymother’sbedside。Beforetheendofthefirstweekinthenewmonth,theworstmisfortuneofallbefellme——mymotherdied。Itwantedthenbutashorttimetomybirthday。Shehadlongedtolivetillthatday。Iwaspresentatherdeath。Herlastwordsinthisworldwereaddressedtome。“Don’tgoback,myson——don’tgoback!“

  Iwasobligedtogoback,ifitwasonlytowatchmywife。Inthelastdaysofmymother’sillnessshehadspitefullyaddedastingtomygriefbydeclaringshewouldassertherrighttoattendthefuneral。InspiteofallthatIcoulddoorsay,sheheldtoherword。Onthedayappointedfortheburialsheforcedherself,inflamedandshamelesswithdrink,intomypresence,andsworeshewouldwalkinthefuneralprocessiontomymother’sgrave。

  Thislastinsult——afterallIhadgonethroughalready——wasmorethanIcouldendure。Itmaddenedme。Trytomakeallowancesforamanbesidehimself。Istruckher。

  Theinstanttheblowwasdealt,Irepentedit。Shecroucheddown,silent,inacorneroftheroom,andeyedmesteadily。Itwasalookthatcooledmyhotbloodinaninstant。Therewasnotimenowtothinkofmakingatonement。Icouldonlyrisktheworst,andmakesureofhertillthefuneralwasover。Ilockedherintoherbedroom。

  WhenIcameback,afterlayingmymotherinthegrave,Ifoundhersittingbythebedside,verymuchalteredinlookandbearing,withabundleonherlap。Shefacedmequietly;shespokewithacuriousstillnessinhervoice——strangelyandunnaturallycomposedinlookandmanner。

  “Nomanhaseverstruckmeyet,“shesaid。“Myhusbandshallhavenosecondopportunity。Setthedooropen,andletmego。“

  Shepassedme,andlefttheroom。Isawherwalkawayupthestreet。Wasshegoneforgood?

  AllthatnightIwatchedandwaited。Nofootstepcamenearthehouse。Thenextnight,overcomewithfatigue,Ilaydownonthebedinmyclothes,withthedoorlocked,thekeyonthetable,andthecandleburning。Myslumberwasnotdisturbed。Thethirdnight,thefourth,thefifth,thesixth,passed,andnothinghappened。Ilaydownontheseventhnight,stillsuspiciousofsomethinghappening;stillinmyclothes;stillwiththedoorlocked,thekeyonthetable,andthecandleburning。

  Myrestwasdisturbed。Iawoketwice,withoutanysensationofuneasiness。Thethirdtime,thathorridshiveringofthenightatthelonelyinn,thatawfulsinkingpainattheheart,camebackagain,androusedmeinaninstant。Myeyesturnedtotheleft-

  handsideofthebed。Andtherestood,lookingatme——

  TheDreamWomanagain?No!Mywife。Thelivingwoman,withthefaceoftheDream——intheattitudeoftheDream——thefairarmup;

  theknifeclaspedinthedelicatewhitehand。

  Ispranguponherontheinstant;butnotquicklyenoughtostopherfromhidingtheknife。Withoutawordfromme,withoutacryfromher,Ipinionedherinachair。WithonehandIfeltuphersleeve;andthere,wheretheDreamWomanhadhiddentheknife,mywifehadhiddenit——theknifewiththebuckhornhandle,thatlookedlikenew。

  WhatIfeltwhenImadethatdiscoveryIcouldnotrealizeatthetime,andIcan’tdescribenow。Itookonesteadylookatherwiththeknifeinmyhand。“Youmeanttokillme?“Isaid。

  “Yes,“sheanswered;“Imeanttokillyou。“Shecrossedherarmsoverherbosom,andstaredmecoollyintheface。“Ishalldoityet,“shesaid。“Withthatknife。“

  Idon’tknowwhatpossessedme——IsweartoyouIamnocoward;andyetIactedlikeacoward。Thehorrorsgotholdofme。Icouldn’tlookather——Icouldn’tspeaktoher。Ileftherwiththeknifeinmyhand,andwentoutintothenight。

  Therewasableakwindabroad,andthesmellofrainwasintheair。ThechurchclockschimedthequarterasIwalkedbeyondthelasthouseinthetown。IaskedthefirstpolicemanImetwhathourthatwas,ofwhichthequarterpasthadjuststruck。

  Themanlookedathiswatch,andanswered,“Twoo’clock。“Twointhemorning。Whatdayofthemonthwasthisdaythathadjustbegun?Ireckoneditupfromthedateofmymother’sfuneral。Thehorridparallelbetweenthedreamandtherealitywascomplete——itwasmybirthday!

  HadIescapedthemortalperilwhichthedreamforetold?orhadI

  onlyreceivedasecondwarning?AsthatdoubtcrossedmymindI

  stoppedonmywayoutofthetown。Theairhadrevivedme——Ifeltinsomedegreelikemyownselfagain。Afteralittlethinking,I

  begantoseeplainlythemistakeIhadmadeinleavingmywifefreetogowhereshelikedandtodoasshepleased。

  Iturnedinstantly,andmademywaybacktothehouse。Itwasstilldark。Ihadleftthecandleburninginthebedchamber。WhenIlookeduptothewindowoftheroomnow,therewasnolightinit。Iadvancedtothehousedoor。Ongoingaway,Irememberedtohaveclosedit;ontryingitnow,Ifounditopen。

  Iwaitedoutside,neverlosingsightofthehousetilldaylight。

  ThenIventuredindoors——listened,andheardnothing——lookedintothekitchen,scullery,parlor,andfoundnothing——wentupatlastintothebedroom。Itwasempty。

  Apicklocklayonthefloor,whichtoldmehowshehadgainedentranceinthenight。AndthatwastheonetraceIcouldfindoftheDreamWoman。

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