第14章
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  “Youleavethisland?“shesaid。“Thatmeansthatyouleaveme,wholoveyou,togoforthastheWandererwent——followingadreamtotheSouth。Well,itisbestthatyoushouldgo,forwhatevertheyhavepromisedyoubutnow,itissurethatthepriestswillkillyou,evenifyouescapethevengeanceofthegod。“Andshelookedaskanceattheshatteredstatuewhichhadsatinitsplaceforsomanygenerationsthatnoneknewwhohadsetitthere,orwhen。

  “Ihavekilledthegod,“Ianswered,pointingtothecrushedviper。

  “Notquite,Olaf,for,see,itstailstillmoves。“

  Thenshewent,leavingmealone。IsatmyselfdownbythemurderedSteinar,andstaredathim。Couldhebereallydead,Iwondered,ordidheliveonelsewhere?MyfaithhadtaughtmeofaplacecalledValhallawherebravemenwent,butinthatfaithanditsgodsI

  believednomore。ThisValhallawasbutachild’stale,inventedbyabloody-mindedfolkwholovedslaughter。WhereverSteinarandtheotherswere,itwasnotinValhalla。Then,perhaps,theysleptlikethebeastsdoafterthesehavebeenbutchered。Perhapsdeathwastheendofall。Itmightbeso,andyetIdidnotbelieveit。TherewereothergodsbesidesOdinandhiscompany,forwhatwerethosewhichwehadfoundintheWanderer’stomb?Ilongedtoknow。

  Yes,Iwouldgosouth,astheWandererwent,andsearchforthem。

  PerhapsthereintheSouthIshouldlearnthesecrettruth——andotherthings。

  Igrewwearyofthesethoughtsofgodswhocouldnotbefound,orwho,iffound,werebutdevils。Mymindwentbacktomychildhood’sdays,whenSteinarandIplayedtogetheronthemeads,beforeanywomanhadcometowreckourlives。Irememberedhowweusedtoplayuntilwewereweary,andhowatnightsIwouldtellhimtalesthatIhadlearnedorwoven,untilatlengthwesanktosleep,ourarmsabouteachother’snecks。Myheartgrewfullofsorrowthatintheendbrokefrommyeyesintears。Yes,IweptoverSteinar,mybrotherSteinar,andkissedhiscoldandgorylips。

  Theeveninggathered,thetwilightgrew,and,onebyone,thestarssprangoutinthequietsky,tillthemoonappearedandgatheredalltheirradiancetoherself。Iheardthesoundofawoman’sdress,andlookedup,thinkingtoseeFreydisa。ButthiswomanwasnotFreydisa;

  itwasIduna!Yes,Iduna’sself!

  Irosetomyfeetandstoodstill。Shealsostoodstill,onthefarthersideofthestoneofsacrificewhereonthatwhichhadbeenSteinarwasstretchedbetweenus。Thencameastruggleofsilence,inwhichshewonatlast。

  “Haveyoucometosavehim?“Iasked。“Ifso,itistoolate。Woman,beholdyourwork。“

  Sheshookherbeautifulheadandanswered,almostinawhisper:

  “Nay,Olaf,Iamcometobegaboonofyou:thatyouwillslayme,hereandnow。“

  “AmIabutcher——orapriest?“Imuttered。

  “Oh,slayme,slayme,Olaf!“shewenton,throwingherselfuponherkneesbeforeme,andrendingopenherbluerobethatheryoungbreastmighttakethesword。“Thus,perchance,I,wholovelife,maypaysomeofthepriceofsin,who,ifIslewmyself,wouldbutmultiplythedebt,whichintruthIdarenotdo。“

  StillIshookmyhead,andoncemoreshespoke:

  “Olaf,inthiswayorinthatdoubtlessmyendwillfindme,for,ifyourefusethisoffice,thereareothersofsternerstuff。TheknifethatsmoteSteinarisnotblunted。Yet,beforeIdie,whoamcomeherebuttodie,Iprayyouhearthetruth,thatmymemorymaybesomewhatlessviletoyouintheafteryears。Olaf,youthinkmethefalsestofthefalse,yetIamnotaltogetherso。Harkyounow!AtthetimethatSteinarsoughtme,somemadnesstookhim。Sosoonaswewerealonetogether,hisfirstwordswere:’Iambewitched。Iloveyou。’

  “Olaf,I’llnotdenythathisworshipstirredmyblood,forhewasgoodly——well,anddifferenttoyou,withyourdreamingeyesandthoughtsthataretoodeepforme。Andyet,bymybreath,IswearthatImeantnoharm。Whenwerodetogethertotheship,itwasmypurposetoreturnuponthemorrowandbemadeyourwife。Butthereupontheshipmyfathercompelledme。ItwashisfancythatIshouldbreakwithyouandbewedtoSteinar,whohadbecomesogreatalordandwhopleasedhimbetterthanyoudid,Olaf。And,asforSteinar——why,haveInottoldyouthathewasmadforme?“

  “Steinar’stalewasotherwise,Iduna。Hesaidthatyouwentfirst,andthathefollowed。“

  “Werethosehiswords,Olaf?For,ifso,howcanIgivethedeadthelie,andonewhodiedthroughme?Itseemsunholy。YetinthismatterSteinarhadnoreasonlefttohimand,whetheryoubelievemeorno,I

  tellthetruth。Oh!hearmeout,forwhoknowswhentheywillcometotakeme,whohavewalkedintothisnestoffoesthatImaybetaken?

  PrayasIwould,theshipwasrunout,andwesailedforLesso。There,inmyfather’shall,uponmyknees,Ientreatedhimtoholdhishand。

  Itoldhimwhatwastrue:that,ofyoutwain,itwasyouIloved,notSteinar。Itoldhimthatifheforcedthismarriage,warwouldcomeofitthatmightmeanallourdeaths。Butthesethingsmovedhimnothing。

  ThenItoldhimthatsuchadeedofshamewouldmeanthelossofSteinar’slordship,sothatbyithewouldgainnoprofit。Atlasthelistened,forthistouchedhimnear。Youknowtherest。Thorvald,yourfather,andRagnar,whoeverhatedme,pressedonthewardespiteallourofferingsofpeace。Sotheshipsmet,andHelahadherfill。“

  “Aye,Iduna,whateverelseisfalse,thisistrue,thatHelahadherfill。“

  “Olaf,Ihavebutonethingmoretosay。Itisthis:Onlyoncedidthosedeadlipstouchmine,andthenitwasagainstmywill。Aye,althoughitisshameful,youmustlearnthetruth。Myfatherheldme,Olaf,whileItookthebetrothalkiss,becauseImust。But,asyouknow,therewasnomarriage。“

  “Aye,Iknowthat,“Isaid,“becauseSteinartoldmeso。“

  “And,saveforthatonekiss,Olaf,Iamstillthemaidwhomonceyoulovedsowell。“

  NowIstaredather。CouldthiswomanliesoblacklyoverdeadSteinar’scorpse?Whenallwassaidanddone,wasitnotpossiblethatshespokethetruth,andthatwehadbeenbutplaythingsinthehandsofanevilFate?Saveforsometriflingerror,whichmightbeforgiventoonewho,asshesaid,lovedtheworshipthatwasherbeauty’sdue,whatifshewereinnocent,afterall?

  Perhapsmyfaceshowedthethoughtsthatwerepassingthroughmymind。

  Attheleast,shewhoknewmewellfoundskilltoreadthem。Shecrepttowardsme,stillonherknees;shecastherarmsaboutme,and,restingherweightuponme,drewherselftoherfeet。

  “Olaf,“shewhispered,“Iloveyou,Iloveyouwell,asIhavealwaysdone,thoughImayhaveerredalittle,aswomenwaywardandstillunwedareapttodo。Olaf,theytoldmeyonderhowyouhadmatchedyourselfagainstthegod,withhispriestsforjudges,andsmittenhim,andIthoughtthisthegreatestdeedthateverIhaveknown。I

  usedtothinkyousomethingofaweakling,Olaf,notinyourbodybutinyourmind,onelostinmusicandinrunes,whofearedtoputthingstothetouchofwar;butyouhaveshownmeotherwise。Youslewthebear;youovercameSteinar,whowassomuchstrongerthanyouare,inthebattleoftheships;andnowyouhavebeardedOdin,theAll-

  father。Look,hisheadliesthere,hewnoffbyyouforthesakeofonewho,afterall,haddoneyouwrong。Olaf,suchadeedasthattouchesawoman’sheart,andhewhodoesitisthemanshewouldwishtolieuponherbreastandbeherlord。Olaf,allthisevilpastmayyetbeforgotten。Wemightgoandliveelsewhereforawhile,oralways,forwithyourwisdomandmybeautyjoinedtogetherwhatcouldwenotconquer?Olaf,IloveyounowasIhaveneverlovedbefore,cannotyoulovemeagain?“

  Herarmsclungaboutme;herbeautifulblueeyes,shimmeringwithmoonlittears,heldmyeyes,andmyheartmeltedbeneathherbreathaswintersnowsmeltinthewindsofspring。Shesaw,sheunderstood;shecastherselfuponme,shakingherlonghairoverbothofus,andseekingmylips。Almostshehadfoundthem,when,feelingsomethinghardbetweenmeandher,somethingthathurtme,Ilookeddown。Hercloakhadslippedorbeenthrownaside,andmyeyecaughttheglintofgoldandjewels。InaninstantIremembered——theWanderer’snecklaceandthedream——andwiththosememoriesmyheartfrozeagain。

  “Nay,Iduna,“Isaid,“Ilovedyouwell;there’snomanwilleverloveyoumore,andyouareveryfair。Whetheryouspeaktruewordsorfalse,Idonotknow;itisbetweenyouandyourownspirit。ButthisIdoknow:thatbetwixtusrunstheriverofSteinar’sblood,aye,andthebloodofThorvald,myfather,ofThora,mymother,ofRagnar,mybrother,andofmanyanothermanwhoclungtous,andthatisastreamwhichIcannotcross。Findyouanotherhusband,IdunatheFair,sinceneverwillIcallyouwife。“

  Sheloosedherarmsfromroundme,and,liftingthemagain,unclaspedtheWanderer’snecklacefromaboutherbreast。

  “Thisitis,“shesaid,“whichhasbroughtalltheseevilsonme。Takeitbackagain,and,whenyoufindher,giveittothatoneforwhomitismeant,thatonewhomyoulovetruly,as,whateveryoumayhavethought,youneverhavelovedme。“

  Thenshesankupontheground,andrestinghergoldenheadupondeadSteinar’sbreast,shewept。

  IthinkitwasthenthatFreydisareturned;atleast,Irecallhertallformstandingnearthestoneofsacrifice,gazingatusboth,astrangesmileonherface。

  “Haveyouwithstood?“shesaid。“Then,truly,youareinthewayofvictoryandhavelesstofearfromwomanthanIthought。Allthingsarereadyasyoucommanded,mylordOlaf,andthereremainsbuttosayfarewell,whichyouhadbestdoquickly,fortheyplotyourdeathyonder。“

  “Freydisa,“Ianswered,“Igo,butperchanceIshallreturnagain。

  Meanwhile,allIhaveisyours,withthischarge。Guardyouyonderwoman,andseehersafetoherhome,orwherevershewouldgo,andtoSteinarheregivehonourableburial。“

  Thenthedarknessofoblivionfalls,andIremembernomoresavethewhitefaceofIduna,herbrowstainedwithSteinar’slife-blood,watchingmeasIwent。

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