第5章
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  However,nothingelsepassedatthattime;itwasbutasur-

  prise,andwhenhewasgoneIsoonrecoveredmyselfagain。

  Hehadstayedlongerwithme,buthehappenedtolookout

  atthewindowandseehissisterscomingupthegarden,so

  hetookhisleave,kissedmeagain,toldmehewasveryserious,

  andIshouldhearmoreofhimveryquickly,andawayhewent,

  leavingmeinfinitelypleased,thoughsurprised;andhadthere

  notbeenonemisfortuneinit,Ihadbeenintheright,butthe

  mistakelayhere,thatMrs。Bettywasinearnestandthe

  gentlemanwasnot。

  Fromthistimemyheadranuponstrangethings,andImay

  trulysayIwasnotmyself;tohavesuchagentlemantalkto

  meofbeinginlovewithme,andofmybeingsuchacharming

  creature,ashetoldmeIwas;thesewerethingsIknewnot

  howtobear,myvanitywaselevatedtothelastdegree。

  Itis

  trueIhadmyheadfullofpride,but,knowingnothingofthe

  wickednessofthetimes,Ihadnotonethoughtofmyown

  safetyorofmyvirtueaboutme;andhadmyyoungmaster

  offereditatfirstsight,hemighthavetakenanylibertyhe

  thoughtfitwithme;buthedidnotseehisadvantage,which

  wasmyhappinessforthattime。

  Afterthisattackitwasnotlongbuthefoundanopportunity

  tocatchmeagain,andalmostinthesameposture;indeed,it

  hadmoreofdesigninitonhispart,thoughnotonmypart。

  wasthus:

  theyoungladieswereallgonea-visitingwiththeir

  mother;hisbrotherwasoutoftown;andasforhisfather,he

  hadbeeninLondonforaweekbefore。

  Hehadsowellwatched

  methatheknewwhereIwas,thoughIdidnotsomuchasknow

  thathewasinthehouse;andhebrisklycomesupthestairsand,

  seeingmeatwork,comesintotheroomtomedirectly,and

  beganjustashedidbefore,withtakingmeinhisarms,and

  kissingmeforalmostaquarterofanhourtogether。

  Itwashisyoungersister’schamberthatIwasin,andasthere

  wasnobodyinthehousebutthemaidsbelow-stairs,hewas,

  itmaybe,theruder;inshort,hebegantobeinearnestwithme

  indeed。

  Perhapshefoundmealittletooeasy,forGodknows

  Imadenoresistancetohimwhileheonlyheldmeinhisarms

  andkissedme;indeed,Iwastoowellpleasedwithittoresist

  himmuch。

  However,asitwere,tiredwiththatkindofwork,wesatdown,

  andtherehetalkedwithmeagreatwhile;hesaidhewas

  charmedwithme,andthathecouldnotrestnightordaytill

  hehadtoldmehowhewasinlovewithme,and,ifIwasable

  tolovehimagain,andwouldmakehimhappy,Ishouldbethe

  savingofhislife,andmanysuchfinethings。

  Isaidlittleto

  himagain,buteasilydiscoveredthatIwasafool,andthatI

  didnotintheleastperceivewhathemeant。

  Endof

  Thenhewalkedabouttheroom,andtakingmebythehand,

  Iwalkedwithhim;andbyandby,takinghisadvantage,he

  threwmedownuponthebed,andkissedmetheremost

  violently;but,togivehimhisdue,offerednomannerof

  rudenesstome,onlykissedagreatwhile。

  Afterthishe

  thoughthehadheardsomebodycomeupstairs,sogotofffrom

  thebed,liftedmeup,professingagreatdealofloveforme,

  buttoldmeitwasallanhonestaffection,andthathemeant

  noilltome;andwiththatheputfiveguineasintomyhand,

  andwentawaydownstairs。

  IwasmoreconfoundedwiththemoneythanIwasbeforewith

  thelove,andbegantobesoelevatedthatIscarceknewthe

  groundIstoodon。

  Iamthemoreparticularinthispart,that

  ifmystorycomestobereadbyanyinnocentyoungbody,they

  maylearnfromittoguardthemselvesagainstthemischiefs

  whichattendanearlyknowledgeoftheirownbeauty。

  Ifa

  youngwomanoncethinksherselfhandsome,sheneverdoubts

  thetruthofanymanthattellsherheisinlovewithher;forif

  shebelievesherselfcharmingenoughtocaptivatehim,’tis

  naturaltoexpecttheeffectsofit。

  Thisyounggentlemanhadfiredhisinclinationasmuchashe

  hadmyvanity,and,asifhehadfoundthathehadanopportunity

  andwassorryhedidnottakeholdofit,hecomesupagainin

  halfanhourorthereabouts,andfallstoworkwithmeagainas

  before,onlywithalittlelessintroduction。

  Andfirst,whenheenteredtheroom,heturnedaboutandshut

  thedoor。

  ’Mrs。Betty,’saidhe,’Ifanciedbeforesomebody

  wascomingupstairs,butitwasnotso;however,’addshe,

  ’iftheyfindmeintheroomwithyou,theyshan’tcatchme

  a-kissingofyou。’ItoldhimIdidnotknowwhoshouldbe

  comingupstairs,forIbelievedtherewasnobodyinthehouse

  butthecookandtheothermaid,andtheynevercameupthose

  stairs。

  ’Well,mydear,’sayshe,’’tisgoodtobesure,however’;

  andsohesitsdown,andwebegantotalk。

  Andnow,though

  Iwasstillallonfirewithhisfirstvisit,andsaidlittle,hedid

  asitwereputwordsinmymouth,tellingmehowpassionately

  helovedme,andthatthoughhecouldnotmentionsuchathing

  tillhecametothisestate,yethewasresolvedtomakemehappy

  then,andhimselftoo;thatistosay,tomarryme,andabundance

  ofsuchfinethings,whichI,poorfool,didnotunderstandthe

  driftof,butactedasiftherewasnosuchthingasanykindof

  lovebutthatwhichtendedtomatrimony;andifhehadspoke

  ofthat,Ihadnoroom,aswellasnopower,tohavesaidno;

  butwewerenotcomethatlengthyet。

  Wehadnotsatlong,buthegotup,and,stoppingmyvery

  breathwithkisses,threwmeuponthebedagain;butthen

  beingbothwellwarmed,hewentfartherwithmethandecency

  permitsmetomention,norhaditbeeninmypowertohave

  deniedhimatthatmoment,hadheofferedmuchmorethan

  hedid。

  However,thoughhetookthesefreedomswithme,itdidnot

  gotothatwhichtheycallthelastfavour,which,todohim

  justice,hedidnotattempt;andhemadethatself-denialofhis

  apleaforallhisfreedomswithmeuponotheroccasionsafter

  this。

  Whenthiswasover,hestayedbutalittlewhile,buthe

  putalmostahandfulofgoldinmyhand,andleftme,making

  athousandprotestationsofhispassionforme,andofhis

  lovingmeaboveallthewomenintheworld。

  ItwillnotbestrangeifInowbegantothink,butalas!itwas

  butwithverylittlesolidreflection。

  Ihadamostunbounded

  stockofvanityandpride,andbutaverylittlestockofvirtue。

  Ididindeedcasesometimeswithmyselfwhatyoungmaster

  aimedat,butthoughtofnothingbutthefinewordsandthe

  gold;whetherheintendedtomarryme,ornottomarryme,

  seemedamatterofnogreatconsequencetome;nordidmy

  thoughtssomuchassuggesttomethenecessityofmaking

  anycapitulationformyself,tillhecametomakeakindof

  formalproposaltome,asyoushallhearpresently。

  ThusIgaveupmyselftoareadinessofbeingruinedwithout

  theleastconcernandamafairmementotoallyoungwomen

  whosevanityprevailsovertheirvirtue。

  Nothingwaseverso

  stupidonbothsides。

  HadIactedasbecameme,andresisted

  asvirtueandhonourrequire,thisgentlemanhadeitherdesisted

  hisattacks,findingnoroomtoexpecttheaccomplishmentof

  hisdesign,orhadmadefairandhonourableproposalsof

  marriage;inwhichcase,whoeverhadblamedhim,nobody

  couldhaveblamedme。

  Inshort,ifhehadknownme,and

  howeasythetrifleheaimedatwastobehad,hewouldhave

  troubledhisheadnofarther,buthavegivenmefourorfive

  guineas,andhavelainwithmethenexttimehehadcomeatme。

  AndifIhadknownhisthoughts,andhowhardhethoughtI

  wouldbetobegained,Imighthavemademyowntermswith

  him;andifIhadnotcapitulatedforanimmediatemarriage,

  Imightforamaintenancetillmarriage,andmighthavehad

  whatIwould;forhewasalreadyrichtoexcess,besideswhat

  hehadinexpectation;butIseemedwhollytohaveabandoned

  allsuchthoughtsasthese,andwastakenuponlywiththepride

  ofmybeauty,andofbeingbelovedbysuchagentleman。

  forthegold,Ispentwholehoursinlookinguponit;Itoldthe

  guineasoverandoverathousandtimesaday。

  Neverpoor

  vaincreaturewassowraptupwitheverypartofthestoryas

  Iwas,notconsideringwhatwasbeforeme,andhownearmy

  ruinwasatthedoor;indeed,IthinkIratherwishedforthat

  ruinthanstudiedtoavoidit。

  Inthemeantime,however,Iwascunningenoughnottogive

  theleastroomtoanyinthefamilytosuspectme,ortoimagine

  thatIhadtheleastcorrespondencewiththisyounggentleman。

  Iscarceeverlookedtowardshiminpublic,oransweredifhe

  spoketomewhenanybodywasnearus;butforallthat,we

  hadeverynowandthenalittleencounter,wherewehadroom

  forawordortwo,annowandthenakiss,butnofairopportunity

  forthemischiefintended;andespeciallyconsideringthathe

  mademorecircumlocutionthan,ifhehadknownbythoughts,

  hehadoccasionfor;andtheworkappearingdifficulttohim,

  hereallymadeitso。

  Butasthedevilisanunweariedtempter,soheneverfailsto

  findopportunityforthatwickednessheinvitesto。

  Itwasone

  eveninethatIwasinthegarden,withhistwoyoungersisters

  andhimself,andallveryinnocentlymerry,whenhefound

  meanstoconveyanoteintomyhand,bywhichhedirected

  metounderstandthathewouldto-morrowdesiremepublicly

  togoofanerrandforhimintothetown,andthatIshouldsee

  himsomewherebytheway。

  Accordingly,afterdinner,heverygravelysaystome,his

  sistersbeingallby,’Mrs。Betty,Imustaskafavourofyou。’

  ’What’sthat?’sayshissecondsister。

  ’Nay,sister,’sayshe

  verygravely,’ifyoucan’tspareMrs。Bettyto-day,anyother

  timewilldo。’

  Yes,theysaid,theycouldspareherwellenough,

  andthesisterbeggedpardonforasking,whichtheydidbutof

  merecourse,withoutanymeaning。

  ’Well,but,brother,’says

  theeldestsister,’youmusttellMrs。Bettywhatitis;ifitbe

  anyprivatebusinessthatwemustnothear,youmaycallher

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