byAnthonyTrollopeThatBelgiumisnowoneoftheEuropeankingdoms，livingbyitsownlaws，restingonitsownbottom，withakingandcourt，palacesandparliamentofitsown，isknowntoalltheworld。Andaverynicelittlekingdomitis；fullofoldtowns，fineFlemishpictures，andinterestingGothicchurches。Butinthememoryofverymanyofuswhodonotthinkourselvesoldmen，Belgium，asitisnowcalled——inthosedaysitusedtobeFlandersandBrabant——wasapartofHolland；anditobtaineditsownindependencebyarevolution。InthatrevolutionthemostimportantmilitarystepwasthesiegeofAntwerp，whichwasdefendedonthepartoftheDutchbyGeneralChasse，withtheutmostgallantry，butneverthelessineffectually。
AfterthesiegeAntwerpbecamequiteashowplace；andamongthevisitorswhoflockedtheretotalkofthegallantgeneral，andtoseewhatremainedofthegreateffortwhichhehadmadetodefendtheplace，weretwoEnglishmen。Onewastheheroofthislittlehistory；andtheotherwasayoungmanofconsiderablylessweightintheworld。ThelessIsayofthelatterthebetter；butitisnecessarythatIshouldgivesomedescriptionoftheformer。
TheRev。AugustusHornewas，atthetimeofmynarrative，abeneficedclergymanoftheChurchofEngland。Theprofessionwhichhehadgracedsateasilyonhim。Itsexternalmarksandsignswereaspleasingtohisfriendsaswereitsinternalcomfortstohimself。
Hewasamanofmuchquietmirth，fullofpolishedwit，andonsomerareoccasionshecoulddescendtothemorenoisyhilarityofajoke。Lovedbyhisfriendshelovedalltheworld。Hehadknownnocareandseennosorrow。Alwaysintendedforholyordershehadenteredthemwithoutascruple，andremainedwithintheirpalewithoutaregret。Attwenty—fourhehadbeenadeacon，attwenty—
sevenapriest，atthirtyarector，andatthirty—fiveaprebendary；
andashisrectorywasrichandhisprebendalstallwellpaid，theRev。AugustusHornewascalledbyall，andcalledhimself，ahappyman。Hisstaturewasaboutsixfeettwo，andhiscorpulenceexceededeventhoseboundswhichsymmetrywouldhavepreferredasbeingmostperfectlycompatibleevenwithsuchaheight。ButneverthelessMr。Hornewasawell—mademan；hishandsandfeetweresmall；hisfacewashandsome，frank，andfullofexpression；hisbrighteyestwinkledwithhumour；hisfinely—cutmouthdisclosedtwomarvellousrowsofwell—preservedivory；andhisslightlyaquilinenosewasjustsuchaprojectionasonewouldwishtoseeonthefaceofawell—fedgood—natureddignitaryoftheChurchofEngland。WhenIaddtoallthisthatthereverendgentlemanwasasgenerousashewasrich——andthekindmotherinwhosearmshehadbeennurturedhadtakencarethatheshouldneverwant——IneedhardlysaythatIwasblessedwithaverypleasanttravellingcompanion。
Imustmentiononemoreinterestingparticular。Mr。Hornewasratherinclinedtodandyism，inaninnocentway。Hisclericalstarchedneckclothwasalwaysofthewhitest，hiscambrichandkerchiefofthefinest，hisbandsadornedwiththebroadestborder；hissablesuitneverdegeneratedtoarustybrown；itnotonlygaveonalloccasionsglossyevidenceoffreshness，butalsoofthetalentwhichtheartisanhaddisplayedinturningoutawell—dressedclergymanoftheChurchofEngland。Hishairwaseverbrushedwithscrupulousattention，andshowedinitsregularwavestheguardiancareofeachseparatebristle。AndallthiswasdonewiththateaseandgracewhichshouldbethecharacteristicsofadignitaryoftheestablishedEnglishChurch。
IhadaccompaniedMr。HornetotheRhine；andwehadreachedBrusselsonourreturn，justatthecloseofthatrevolutionwhichendedinaffordingathronetotheson—in—lawofGeorgetheFourth。
AtthatmomentGeneralChasse’snameandfamewereineveryman’smouth，and，likeothercuriousadmirersofthebrave，Mr。HornedeterminedtodevotetwodaystothesceneofthelateeventsatAntwerp。Antwerp，moreover，possessesperhapsthefinestspire，andcertainlyoneofthethreeorfourfinestpictures，intheworld。
OfGeneralChasse，ofthecathedral，andoftheRubens，Ihadheardmuch，andwasthereforewellpleasedthatsuchshouldbehisresolution。ThisaccomplishedweweretoreturntoBrussels；andthence，viaGhent，Ostend，andDover，ItocompletemylegalstudiesinLondon，andMr。HornetoenjoyoncemorethepeacefulretirementofOllertonrectory。AsweweretobeabsentfromBrusselsbutonenightwewereenabledtoindulgeinthegratificationoftravellingwithoutourluggage。Asmallsac—de—nuitwasprepared；brushes，combs，razors，strops，achangeoflinen，&c。&c。，werecarefullyputup；butourheavybaggage，ourcoats，waistcoats，andotherwearingapparelwereunnecessary。Itwasdelightfultofeeloneselfsolight—handed。Thereverendgentleman，withmyhumbleselfbyhisside，lefttheportaloftheHoteldeBelleVueat7a。m。，ingoodhumourwithalltheworld。Therewerenorailroadsinthosedays；
butacabriolet，bigenoughtoholdsixpersons，withropetracesandcorrespondingappendages，depositedusattheGoldenFleeceinsomethinglessthansixhours。Theinwardmanwasdulyfortified，andwestartedforthecastle。
Itbootsnotheretodescribetheeffectswhichgunpowderandgrape—
shothadhadonthewallsofAntwerp。LetthecuriousinthesemattersreadthehorrorsofthesiegeofTroy，orthehistoryofJerusalemtakenbyTitus。TheonemaybefoundinHomer，andtheotherinJosephus。OriftheypreferdoingsofalaterdatethereisthetakingofSebastopol，asnarratedinthecolumnsofthe\"Times\"newspaper。Theaccountsareequallytrue，instructive，andintelligible。InthemeantimeallowtheRev。AugustusHorneandmyselftoentertheprivatechambersoftherenownedthoughdefeatedgeneral。
Werambledforawhilethroughthecoveredway，overtheglacisandalongthecounterscarp，andlistenedtotheguideashedetailedtous，inalreadyaccustomedwords，howthesiegehadgone。Thenwegotintotheprivateapartmentsofthegeneral，and，havingdexterouslyshakenoffourattendant，wanderedatlargeamongthedesertedrooms。
\"Itisclearthatnooneevercomeshere，\"saidI。
\"No，\"saidtheRev。Augustus；\"itseemsnot；andtotellthetruth，Idon’tknowwhyanyoneshouldcome。Thechambersinthemselvesarenotattractive。\"
Whathesaidwastrue。Theywereplain，ugly，square，unfurnishedrooms，hereabigone，andtherealittleone，asisusualinmosthouses；——unfurnished，thatis，forthemostpart。Inoneplacewedidfindatableandafewchairs，inanotherabedstead，andsoon。
Buttomeitwaspleasanttoindulgeinthoseruminationswhichanytracesofthegreatorunfortunatecreateinsoftlysympathisingminds。Foratimewecommunicatedourthoughtstoeachotherasweroamedfreeasairthroughtheapartments；andthenIlingeredforafewmomentsbehind，whileMr。Hornemovedonwithaquickerstep。
AtlastIenteredthebedchamberofthegeneral，andthereI
overtookmyfriend。Hewasinspecting，withmuchattention，anarticleofthegreatman’swardrobewhichheheldinhishand。Itwaspreciselythatvirilehabilimenttowhichawell—knowngallantcaptainalludesinhisconversationwiththeposthumousappearanceofMissBailey，ascontainingaBankofEngland5poundnote。
\"Thegeneralmusthavebeenalargeman，George，orhewouldhardlyhavefilledthese，\"saidMr。Horne，holdinguptothelighttherespectableleathernarticlesinquestion。\"Hemusthavebeenaverylargeman，——thelargestmaninAntwerp，Ishouldthink；orelsehistailorhasdonehimmorethanjustice。\"
Theywerecertainlylarge，andhadaboutthemacharmingregimentalmilitaryappearance。Theyweremadeofwhiteleather，withbrightmetalbuttonsatthekneesandbrightmetalbuttonsatthetop。
Theyownednopockets，andwere，withtheexceptionofthelegitimateoutlet，continuousinthecircumferenceofthewaistband。
Nodanglingstringsgavethemanappearanceofsenileimbecility。
Wereitnotforacertainrigidity，sternness，andmentalinflexibility，——wewillcallitmilitaryardour，——withwhichtheywereimbued，theywouldhavecreatedenvyinthebosomofafox—
hunter。
Mr。Hornewasnofox—hunter，butstillheseemedtobeirresistiblytakenwiththelady—likepropensityofwishingtowearthem。
\"Surely，George，\"hesaid，\"thegeneralmusthavebeenastoutermanthanIam\"——andhecontemplatedhisownproportionswithcomplacency——\"thesewhat’s—the—namesarequitebigenoughforme。\"
Idifferedinopinion，andwasobligedtoexplainthatIthoughthedidthegoodlivingofOllertoninsufficientjustice。
\"Iamsuretheyarelargeenoughforme，\"herepeated，withconsiderableobstinacy。Ismiledincredulously；andthentosettlethematterheresolvedthathewouldtrythemon。Nobodyhadbeenintheseroomsforthelasthour，anditappearedasthoughtheywerenevervisited。Eventheguidehadnotcomeonwithus，butwasemployedinshowingotherpartiesaboutthefortifications。Itwasclearthatthisportionofthebuildingwasleftdesolate，andthattheexperimentmightbesafelymade。SothesportiverectordeclaredthathewouldforashorttimeweartheregimentalswhichhadoncecontainedthevalorousheartofGeneralChasse。
WithalldecorumtheRev。Mr。HornedivestedhimselfoftheworkoftheLondonartist’sneedle，and，carefullyplacinghisowngarmentsbeyondthereachofdust，essayedtofithimselfinmilitarygarb。
Atthatimportantmoment——atthecriticalinstantoftheattempt——
theclatteroffemalevoiceswasheardapproachingthechamber。
Theymusthavesuddenlycomeroundsomepassagecorner，foritwasevidentbythesoundthattheywerecloseuponusbeforewehadanywarningoftheiradvent。AtthisveryminuteMr。Hornewassomewhatembarrassedinhisattempts，andwasnotfullyinpossessionofhisusualactivepowersofmovement，norofhisusualpresenceofmind。
Heonlylookedforescape；andseeingadoorpartlyopen，hewithdifficultyretreatedthroughit，andIfollowedhim。Wefoundthatwewereinasmalldressing—room；andasbygoodluckthedoorwasdefendedbyaninnerbolt，myfriendwasabletoprotecthimself。
\"Thereshallbeanothersiege，atanyrateasstoutasthelast，beforeIsurrender，\"saidhe。
Astheladiesseemedinclinedtolingerintheroomitbecameamatterofimportancethattheabove—namedarticlesshouldfit，notonlyforornamentbutforuse。Itwasverycold，andMr。HornewasaltogetherunusedtomoveinaHighlandsphereoflife。Butalas，alas！GeneralChassehadnotbeennurturedintheclassicalretirementofOllerton。Theungivingleatherwouldstretchnopointtoaccommodatethedivine，thoughithadbeenwillingtoministertotheconvenienceofthesoldier。Mr。Hornewasvexedandchilled；
andthrowingthenowhatefulgarmentsintoacorner，andprotectinghimselffromthecoldasbesthemightbystandingwithhiskneestogetherandhisbodysomewhatbentsoastogivetheskirtsofhiscoatanopportunityofdoingextraduty，hebeggedmetoseeifthosejabberingfemaleswerenotgoingtoleavehiminpeacetorecoverhisownproperty。Iaccordinglywenttothedoor，andopeningittoasmallextentIpeepedthrough。
WhoshalldescribemyhorroratthesightwhichIthensaw？Thescene，whichhadhithertobeentintedwithcomiceffect，wasnowbecomingsodecidedlytragicthatIdidnotdareatoncetoacquaintmyworthypastorwiththatwhichwasoccurring，——and，alas！hadalreadyoccurred。
Fivecountry—womenofourown——itwaseasytoknowthembytheirdressandgeneralaspect——werestandinginthemiddleoftheroom；
andoneofthem，thecentreofthegroup，theseniorharpyofthelot，amaidenlady——Icouldhavesworntothat——witharednose，heldinonehandahugepairofscissors，andintheother——thealreadydevotedgoodsofmymostunfortunatecompanion！Downfromthewaistband，throughthatgoodlyexpanse，afellgashhadalreadygonethroughandthrough；andinuseless，unbecomingdisorderthebroadclothfellpendantfromherarmonthissideandonthat。AtthatmomentIconfessthatIhadnotthecouragetospeaktoMr。
Horne，——noteventolookathim。
Imustdescribethatgroup。OfthefigurenexttomeIcouldonlyseetheback。Itwasabroadbackdoneupinblacksilknotofthenewest。Thewholefigure，onemaysay，wasdumpy。Theblacksilkwasnotlong，asdressesnowareworn，norwideinitsskirts。Ineverywayitwasskimpy，consideringthebreadthithadtocover；
andbelowthesilkIsawtheheelsoftwothickshoes，andenoughtoswearbyoftwowoollenstockings。Abovethesilkwasaredandblueshawl；andabovethataponderous，elaboratebrownbonnet，astothematerialsofwhichIshouldnotwishtoundergoanexamination。OverandbeyondthisIcouldonlyseethebacksofhertwohands。Theywereheldupasthoughinwonderatthatwhichthered—nosedholderofthescissorshaddaredtodo。
Oppositetothislady，andwithherfacefullytamedtome，wasakindly—looking，fatmotherlywoman，withlight—colouredhair，notinthebestorder。Shewashotandscarletwithexercise，beingperhapstoostoutforthesteepstepsofthefortress；andinonehandsheheldahandkerchief，withwhichfromtimetotimeshewipedherbrow。Intheotherhandsheheldoneoftheextremitiesofmyfriend’sproperty，feeling——good，carefulsoul！——whatwasthetextureofthecloth。Asshedidso，Icouldseeaglanceofapprobationpassacrossherwarmfeatures。Ilikedthatlady’sface，inspiteofheruntidyhair，andfeltthathadshebeenalonemyfriendwouldnothavebeeninjured。
Oneithersideofhertherestoodaflaxen—hairedmaiden，withlongcurls，largeblueeyes，freshredcheeks，anundefinedlumpynose，andlargegood—humouredmouth。Theywereaslikeastwopeas，onlythatonewashalfaninchtallerthantheother；andtherewasnodifficultyindiscovering，atamoment’sglance，thattheywerethechildrenofthatover—heatedmatronwhowasfeelingthewebofmyfriend’scloth。
Buttheprincipalfigurewasshewhoheldthecentreplaceinthegroup。Shewastallandthin，withfierce—lookingeyes，renderedmorefiercebythespectacleswhichshewore；witharednoseasI
saidbefore；andaboutheranundescribablesomethingwhichquiteconvincedmethatshehadneverknown——couldneverknow——aughtofthecomfortsofmarriedlife。Itwasshewhoheldthescissorsandtheblackgarments。Itwasshewhohadgiventhatunkindcut。AsI
lookedathershewhiskedherselfquicklyroundfromonecompaniontotheother，triumphinginwhatshehaddone，andreadytotriumphfurtherinwhatshewasabouttodo。IimmediatelyconceivedadeephatredforthatQueenoftheHarpies。
\"Well，Isupposetheycan’tbewantedagain，\"saidthemother，rubbingherforehead。
\"Ohdearno！\"saidsheoftherednose。\"Theyarerelics！\"I
thoughttoleapforth；butforwhatpurposeshouldIhaveleaped？
Theaccursedscissorshadalreadydonetheirwork；andthesymmetry，nay，eventheutilityofthevestmentwasdestroyed。
\"GeneralChasseworeaverygoodarticle；——Iwillsaythatforhim，\"
continuedthemother。
\"Ofcoursehedid！\"saidtheQueenHarpy。\"Whyshouldhenot，seeingthatthecountrypaidforitforhim？Well，ladies，who’sforhavingabit？\"
\"Ohmy！youwon’tgofortocutthemup，\"saidthestoutback。
\"Won’tI，\"saidthescissors；andsheimmediatelymadeanotherincision。\"Who’sforhavingabit？Don’tallspeakatonce。\"
\"Ishouldlikeamorselforapincushion，\"saidflaxen—hairedMissNo。1，ayoungladyaboutnineteen，actuatedbyageneralaffectionforallsword—bearing，fire—eatingheroes。\"Ishouldliketohavesomethingtomakemethinkofthepoorgeneral！\"
Snip，snipwentthescissorswithprofessionalrapidity，andaroundpiecewasextractedfromthebackofthecalfoftheleftleg。I
shudderedwithhorror；andsodidtheRev。AugustusHornewithcold。
\"Ihardlythinkit’spropertocutthemup，\"saidMissNo。2。
\"Ohisn’tit？\"saidtheharpy。\"ThenI’lldowhat’simproper！\"Andshegotherfingerandthumbwellthroughtheholesinthescissors’
handles。Asshespokeresolutionwasplainlymarkedonherbrow。
\"Well，iftheyaretobecutup，Ishouldcertainlylikeabitforapen—wiper，\"saidNo。2。No。2wasaliteraryyoungladywithaperiodicalcorrespondence，ajournal，andanalbum。Snip，snipwentthescissorsagain，andthebroadpartoftheupperrightdivisionaffordedamplematerialsforapen—wiper。
Thentheladywiththeback，seeingthatthedesecrationofthearticlehadbeencompleted，pluckedupheartofcourageandputinherlittlerequest；\"IthinkImighthaveaneedle—caseoutofit，\"
saidshe，\"justasasuvneerofthepoorgeneral\"——andalongfragmentcutrapidlyoutofthewaistbandaffordedherunqualifieddelight。
Mamma，withthehotfaceanduntidyhair，camenext。\"Well，girls，\"
shesaid，\"asyouareallserved，Idon’tseewhyI’mtobeleftout。Perhaps，MissGrogram\"——shewasanoldmaid，yousee——
\"perhaps，MissGrogram，youcouldgetmeasmuchaswouldmakeadecent—sizedreticule。\"
Therewasnottheslightestdifficultyindoingthis。Theharpyinthecentreagainwenttowork，snip，snip，andextractingfromthatportionoftheaffairswhichusuallysustainedthegreaterportionofMr。Horne’sweighttwolargeroundpiecesofcloth，presentedthemtothewell—pleasedmatron。\"Thegeneralknewwellwheretogetabitofgoodbroadcloth，certainly，\"saidshe，againfeelingthepieces。
\"AndnowforNo。1，\"saidshewhomIsoabsolutelyhated；\"Ithinkthereisstillenoughforapairofslippers。There’snothingsoniceforthehouseasgoodblackclothslippersthatarewarmtothefeetanddon’tshowthedirt。\"Andsosaying，shespreadoutonthefloorthelaceratedremainders。
\"There’sanicebitthere，\"saidyoungladyNo。2，pokingatoneofthepocketswiththeendofherparasol。
\"Yes，\"saidtheharpy，contemplatingherplunder。\"ButI’mthinkingwhetherIcouldn’tgetleggingsaswell。Ialwayswearleggingsinthethickofthewinter。\"Andsosheconcludedheroperations，andtherewasnothingleftbutamelancholyskeletonofseamsandbuttons。
Allthishavingbeenachieved，theypocketedtheirplunderandpreparedtodepart。Therearepeoplewhohaveawonderfulappetiteforrelics。AstonewithwhichWashingtonhadbrokenawindowwhenaboy——withwhichhehaddonesoorhadnot，forthereislittledifference；abuttonthatwasonacoatofNapoleon’s，oronthatofoneofhislackeys；abulletsaidtohavebeenpickedupatWaterlooorBunker’sHill；these，andsuchlikethingsaregreattreasures。
Andtheirmostdesirablecharacteristicistheeasewithwhichtheyareattained。Anybulletoranybuttondoesthework。Faithaloneisnecessary。Andnowtheseladieshadmadethemselveshappyandgloriouswith\"Relics\"ofGeneralChassecutfromtheill—usedhabilimentsofanelderlyEnglishgentleman！
Theydepartedatlast，andMr。Horne，foronceinanillhumour，followedmeintothebedroom。HereImustbeexcusedifIdrawaveiloverhismanlysorrowatdiscoveringwhatfatehaddoneforhim。Rememberwhatwashisposition，unclothedintheCastleofAntwerp！ThenearestsuitablechangeforthosewhichhadbeendestroyedwaslockedupinhisportmanteauattheHoteldeBelleRueinBrussels！Hehadnothinglefttohim——literallynothing，inthatAntwerpworld。TherewasnootherwretchedbeingwanderingtheninthatDutchtownsoutterlydenudedofthegoodsoflife。Forwhatisamanfit，——forwhatcanhebefit，——whenleftinsuchaposition？Therearesomeevilswhichseemutterlytocrushaman；
andiftherebeanymisfortunetowhichamanmaybeallowedtosuccumbwithoutimputationonhismanliness，surelyitissuchasthis。HowwasMr。Hornetoreturntohishotelwithoutincurringthedispleasureofthemunicipality？Thatwasmyfirstthought。
Hehadacloak，butitwasattheinn；andIfoundthatmyfriendwasoppressedwithagreathorrorattheideaofbeingleftalone；
sothatIcouldnotgoinsearchofit。Thereisanoldsaying，thatnomanisaherotohisvaletdechambre，thereasondoubtlessbeingthis，thatitiscustomaryforhisvalettoseetheherodivestedofthosetrappingsinwhichsomuchoftheheroicconsists。
Whoreverencesaclergymanwithouthisgown，orawarriorwithouthisswordandsabre—tasche？WhatwouldevenMinervabewithoutherhelmet？
IdonotwishittobeunderstoodthatInolongerreverencedMr。
Hornebecausehewasinanundress；buthehimselfcertainlylostmuchofhiscomposed，well—sustaineddignityofdemeanour。Hewasfearfulandquerulous，cold，andrathercross。When，forgettinghissize，Iofferedhimmyown，hethoughtthatIwaslaughingathim。
Hebegantobeafraidthatthestorywouldgetabroad，andhethenandthereexactedapromisethatIwouldnevertellitduringhislifetime。Ihavekeptmyword；butnowmyoldfriendhasbeengatheredtohisfathers，fullofyears。
AtlastIgothimtothehotel。Itwaslongbeforehewouldleavethecastle，cloakedthoughhewas；——not，indeed，tilltheshadesofeveninghaddimmedtheoutlinesofmenandthings，andmadeindistincttheoutwardgarnitureofthosewhopassedtoandfrointhestreets。Then，wrappedinhiscloak，Mr。Hornefollowedmealongthequaysandthroughthenarrowestofthestreets；andatlength，withoutventuringtoreturnthegazeofanyoneinthehotelcourt，hemadehiswayuptohisownbedroom。
Dinnerlessandsupperlesshewenttohiscouch。Butwhentherehedidconsenttoreceivesomeconsolationintheshapeofmuttoncutletsandfriedpotatoes，asavoryomelet，andabottleofclaret。
ThemuttoncutletsandfriedpotatoesattheGoldenFleeceatAntwerpare——orwerethen，forIamspeakingnowofwell—nighthirtyyearssince——remarkablygood；theclaret，also，wasofthebest；andso，bydegrees，thelookofdespairingdismaypassedfromhisface，andsomescintillationsoftheoldfirereturnedtohiseyes。
\"Iwonderwhethertheyfindthemselvesmuchhappierforwhattheyhavegot？\"saidhe。
\"Agreatdealhappier，\"saidI。\"They’llboastofthosethingstoalltheirfriendsathome，andweshalldoubtlessseesomeaccountoftheirsuccessinthenewspapers。\"
\"Itwouldbedelightfultoexposetheirblunder，——toshowthemup。