第69章
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  FicialReceiverswithflamingswordstodriveusoutofourgarden!I’dhopedwe’dneverhaveanotherTrek。Well——anyway,itwon’tbeCrestHill。Butit’shardonTeddy。Hemustbeinsuchamessupthere。Pooroldchap。Isupposewecan’thelphim。Isupposewe’donlyworryhim。HavesomemoresoupGeorge——whilethereissome?。”

  Thenextdaywasoneofthosedaysofstrongperceptionthatstandoutclearinone’smemorywhenthecommoncourseofdaysisblurred。Icanrecallnowtheawakeninginthelargefamiliarroomthatwasalwayskeptforme,andhowIlaystaringatitschintz-coveredchairs,itsspacedfinefurniture,itsglimpseofthecedarswithout,andthoughtthatallthishadtoend。

  Ihaveneverbeengreedyformoney,Ihaveneverwantedtoberich,butIfeltnowanimmensesenseofimpendingdeprivation。

  Ireadthenewspapersafterbreakfast——Iandmyaunttogether——andthenIwalkeduptoseewhatCothopehaddoneinthematterofLordRobertsB。NeverbeforehadIappreciatedsoacutelytheamplebrightnessoftheLadyGrovegardens,thedignityandwidepeaceofallaboutme。ItwasoneofthosewarmmorningsinlateMaythathavewonallthegloryofsummerwithoutlosingthegaydelicacyofspring。Theshrubberywasbrightwithlaburnumandlilac,thebedsswarmedwithdaffodilsandnarcissiandwithliliesofthevalleyintheshade。

  Iwentalongthewell-keptpathsamongtherhododendraandthroughtheprivategateintothewoodswherethebluebellsandcommonorchidwereinprofusion。NeverbeforehadItastedsocompletelythefinesenseofprivilegeandownership。Andallthishastoend,Itoldmyself,allthishastoend。

  NeithermyunclenorIhadmadeanyprovisionfordisaster;allwehadwasinthegame,andIhadlittledoubtnowofthecompletenessofourruin。ForthefirsttimeinmylifesincehehadsentmethatwonderfultelegramofhisIhadtoconsiderthatcommonanxietyofmankind,——Employment。Ihadtocomeoffmymagiccarpetandwalkoncemoreintheworld。

  AndsuddenlyIfoundmyselfatthecrossdriveswhereIhadseenBeatriceforthefirsttimeaftersomanyyears。Itisstrange,butsofarasIcanrecollectIhadnotthoughtofheroncesinceIhadlandedatPlymouth。Nodoubtshehadfilledthebackgroundofmymind,butIdonotrememberonedefinite,clearthought。I

  hadbeenintentonmyuncleandthefinancialcollapse。

  Itcamelikeablowinthefacenow;allthat,too,hadtoend!

  SuddenlyIwasfilledwiththethoughtofherandagreatlongingforher。Whatwouldshedowhensherealisedourimmensedisaster?Whatwouldshedo?Howwouldshetakeit?ItfilledmewithastonishmenttorealisehowlittleIcouldtell。

  ShouldIperhapspresentlyhappenuponher?

  Iwentonthroughtheplantationsandoutuponthedowns,andthenceIsawCothopewithanewgliderofhisowndesignsoaringdownwindtomyoldfamiliar“grounding“place。Tojudgebyitslongrhythmitwasaverygoodglider。“LikeCothope’scheek。”

  thoughtI,“togoonwiththeresearch。Iwonderifhe’skeepingnotes。Butallthiswillhavetostop。”

  Hewassincerelygladtoseeme。“It’sbeenarumgo。”hesaid。

  Hehadbeentherewithoutwagesforamonth,amanforgottenintherushofevents。

  “IjuststuckonanddidwhatIcouldwiththestuff。Igotabitofmoneyofmyown——andIsaidtomyself,’Well,hereyouarewiththegearandnoonetolookafteryou。Youwon’tgetsuchachanceagain,myboy,notinallyourborndays。Whynotmakewhatyoucanwithit?’“

  “How’sLordRobertsB?”

  Cothopeliftedhiseyebrows。“I’vehadtorefrain。”hesaid。

  “Buthe’slookingveryhandsome。”

  “Gods!”Isaid,“I’dliketogethimupjustoncebeforewesmash。Youreadthepapers?Youknowwe’regoingtosmash?”

  “Oh!Ireadthepapers。It’sscandalous,sir,suchworkasoursshoulddependonthingslikethat。YouandIoughttobeundertheState,sir,ifyou’llexcuseme“

  “Nothingtoexcuse。”Isaid。“I’vealwaysbeenaSocialist——ofasort——intheory。Let’sgoandhavealookathim。Howishe?

  Deflated?”

  “Justaboutquarterfull。Thatlastoilglazeofyoursholdsthegassomethingbeautiful。He’snotlostacubicmetreaweek。”。

  CothopereturnedtoSocialismaswewenttowardthesheds。

  “Gladtothinkyou’reaSocialist,sir。”hesaid,“it’stheonlycivilisedstate。IbeenaSocialistsomeyears——offtheClarion。It’sarottenscramble,thisworld。Ittakesthethingswemakeandinventanditplaysthesillyfoolwith’em。

  Wescientificpeople,we’llhavetotakethingsoverandstopallthisfinancingandadvertisementandthat。It’stoosilly。

  It’sanoosance。Lookatus!”

  LordRobertsB,eveninhispartiallydeflatedconditioninhisshed,wasafinethingtostareupat。IstoodsidebysidewithCothoperegardinghim,anditwasborneinuponmemoreacutelythaneverthatallthishadtoend。Ihadafeelingjustlikethefeelingofaboywhowantstodowrong,thatIwoulduseupthestuffwhileIhaditbeforethecreditorsdescended。Ihadaqueerfancy,too,Iremember,thatifIcouldgetintotheairitwouldadvertisemyreturntoBeatrice。

  “We’llfillher。”Isaidconcisely。

  “It’sallready。”saidCothope,andaddedasanafterthought,“unlesstheycutoffthegas。”。

  IworkedandinterestedmyselfwithCothopeallthemorningandforatimeforgotmyothertroubles。ButthethoughtofBeatricefloodedmeslowlyandsteadily。Itbecameanunintelligentsicklongingtoseeher。IfeltthatIcouldnotwaitforthefillingofLordRobertsB,thatImusthuntherupandseehersoon。I

  goteverythingforwardandlunchedwithCothope,andthenwiththefeeblestexcuseslefthiminordertoprowldownthroughthewoodstowardsBedleyCorner。Ibecameapreytowretchedhesitationsanddiffidence。OughtItogonearhernow?Iaskedmyself,reviewingallthesocialabasementsofmyearlyyears。

  Atlast,aboutfive,IcalledattheDowerHouse。IwasgreetedbytheirCharlotte——withaforbiddingeyeandacoldastonishment。

  BothBeatriceandLadyOspreywereout。

  Therecameintomyheadsomeprowlingdreamofmeetingher。I

  wentalongthelanetowardsWoking,thelanedownwhichwehadwalkedfivemonthsagointhewindandrain。

  Imoonedforatimeinourformerfootsteps,thensworeandturnedbackacrossthefields,andthenconceivedadistasteforCothopeandwentDownward。AtlastIfoundmyselflookingdownonthehugeabandonedmassesoftheCrestHillhouse。

  Thatgavemymindatwistintoanewchannel。Myunclecameuppermostagain。Whatastrange,melancholyemptinessofintentionthatstrickenenterpriseseemedintheeveneveningsunlight,whatvulgarmagnificenceandcrudityandutterabsurdity!Itwasasidioticasthepyramids。Isatdownonthestile,staringatitasthoughIhadneverseenthatforestofscaffoldpoles,thatwasteofwallsandbricksandplasterandshapedstones,thatwildernessofbrokensoilandwheelingtracksanddumpsbefore。ItstruckmesuddenlyasthecompactestimageandsampleofallthatpassesforProgress,ofalltheadvertisement-inflatedspending,theaimlessbuildingupandpullingdown,theenterpriseandpromiseofmyage。Thiswasourfruit,thiswaswhathehaddone,Iandmyuncle,inthefashionofourtime。Wewereitsleadersandexponents,wewerethethingitmostflourishinglyproduced。Forthisfutilityinitsend,foranepochofsuchfutility,thesolemnscrollofhistoryhadunfolded。

  “GreatGod!”Icried,“butisthisLife?”

  Forthisthearmiesdrilled,forthistheLawwasadministeredandtheprisonsdidtheirduty,forthisthemillionstoiledandperishedinsuffering,inorderthatafewofusshouldbuildpalacesweneverfinished,makebilliard-roomsunderponds,runimbecilewallsroundirrationalestates,scorchabouttheworldinmotor-cars,deviseflying-machines,playgolfandadozensuchfoolishgamesofball,crowdintochatteringdinnerparties,gambleandmakeourlivesonevast,dismalspectacleofwitlesswaste!Soitstruckmethen,andforatimeIcouldthinkofnootherinterpretation。ThiswasLife!Itcametomelikearevelation,arevelationatonceincredibleandindisputableoftheabysmalfollyofourbeing。

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