第6章
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  ThefirsttwoorthreebucksIeversawgavemebuckfeverbadly,butafterIhadgainedexperiencewithordinarygameIneverhadbuckfeveratallwithdangerousgame。Inmycasetheovercomingofbuckfeverwastheresultofconsciouseffortandadeliberatedeterminationtoovercomeit。Morehappilyconstitutedmenneverhavetomakethisdeterminedeffortatall——whichmayperhapsshowthattheaveragemancanprofitmorefrommyexperiencesthanhecanfromthoseoftheexceptionalman。

  Ihaveshotonlyfivekindsofanimalswhichcanfairlybecalleddangerousgame——thatis,thelion,elephant,rhinoceros,andbuffaloinAfrica,andthebiggrizzlybearaquarterofacenturyagointheRockies。Takingintoaccountnotonlymyownpersonalexperience,buttheexperiencesofmanyveteranhunters,IregardallthefourAfricananimals,butespeciallythelion,elephant,andbuffalo,asmuchmoredangerousthanthegrizzly。Asithappened,however,theonlynarrowescapeIpersonallyeverhadwasfromagrizzly,andinAfricatheanimalkilledclosesttomeasitwaschargingwasarhinoceros——allofwhichgoestoshowthatamanmustnotgeneralizetoobroadlyfromhisownpersonalexperiences。Onthewhole,Ithinkthelionthemostdangerousofallthesefiveanimals;thatis,Ithinkthat,iffairlyhunted,thereisalargerpercentageofhunterskilledormauledforagivennumberoflionskilledthanforagivennumberofanyoneoftheotheranimals。YetIpersonallyhadnodifficultieswithlions。I

  twicekilledlionswhichwereatbayandjuststartingtocharge,andIkilledaheavy-manedmalewhileitwasinfullcharge。ButineachinstanceIhadplentyofleeway,theanimalbeingsofaroffthatevenifmybullethadnotbeenfatalIshouldhavehadtimeforacouplemoreshots。TheAfricanbuffaloisundoubtedlyadangerousbeast,butithappenedthatthefewthatIshotdidnotcharge。Abullelephant,avicious“rogue。”whichhadbeenkillingpeopleinthenativevillages,didchargebeforebeingshotat。MysonKermitandIstoppeditatfortyyards。Anotherbullelephant,alsounwounded,whichcharged,nearlygotme,asIhadjustfiredbothcartridgesfrommyheavydouble-barreledrifleinkillingthebullIwasafter——thefirstwildelephantIhadeverseen。Thesecondbullcamethroughthethickbrushtomyleftlikeasteamplowthroughalightsnowdrift,everythingsnappingbeforehisrush,andwassonearthathecouldhavehitmewithhistrunk。Islippedpasthimbehindatree。PeoplehaveaskedmehowIfeltonthisoccasion。MyanswerhasalwaysbeenthatIsupposeIfeltasmostmenoflikeexperiencefeelonsuchoccasions。Atsuchamomentahunterissoverybusythathehasnotimetogetfrightened。Hewantstogetinhiscartridgesandtryanothershot。

  Rhinocerosaretruculent,blusteringbeasts,muchthemoststupidofallthedangerousgameIknow。Generallytheirattitudeisoneofmerestupidityandbluff。Butonoccasionstheydochargewickedly,bothwhenwoundedandwhenentirelyunprovoked。ThefirstIevershotI

  mortallywoundedatafewrods’distance,anditchargedwiththeutmostdetermination,whereatIandmycompanionbothfired,andmorebygoodluckthananythingelsebroughtittothegroundjustthirteenpacesfromwherewestood。Anotherrhinocerosmayormaynothavebeenmeaningtochargeme;Ihaveneverbeencertainwhich。Itheardusandcameatusthroughratherthickbrush,snortingandtossingitshead。

  Iambynomeanssurethatithadfixedlyhostileintentions,andindeedwithmypresentexperienceIthinkitlikelythatifIhadnotfireditwouldhaveflinchedatthelastmomentandeitherretreatedorgonebyme。ButIamnotarhinocerosmindreader,anditsactionsweresuchastowarrantmyregardingitasasuspiciouscharacter。I

  stoppeditwithacoupleofbullets,andthenfolloweditupandkilledit。TheskinsofalltheseanimalswhichIthuskilledareintheNationalMuseumatWashington。

  But,asIsaidabove,theonlynarrowescapeImetwithwasnotfromoneofthesedangerousAfricananimals,butfromagrizzlybear。Itwasabouttwenty-fouryearsago。Ihadwoundedthebearjustatsunset,inawoodoflodge-polepines,and,followinghim,Iwoundedhimagain,ashestoodontheothersideofathicket。Hethenchargedthroughthebrush,comingwithsuchspeedandwithsuchanirregulargaitthat,tryasIwould,Iwasnotabletogetthesightofmyrifleonthebrain-pan,thoughIhithimveryhardwithboththeremainingbarrelsofmymagazineWinchester。Itwasinthedaysofblackpowder,andthesmokehung。Aftermylastshot,thefirstthingIsawwasthebear’sleftpawashestruckatme,soclosethatImadeaquickmovementtooneside。Hewas,however,practicallyalreadydead,andafteranotherjump,andwhileintheveryactoftryingtoturntocomeatme,hecollapsedlikeashotrabbit。

  Bytheway,Ihadamostexasperatingtimetryingtobringinhisskin。Iwasalone,travelingonfootwithoneverydocilelittlemountainmareforapackpony。Thelittlemarecarednothingforbearsoranythingelse,sotherewasnodifficultyinpackingher。Butthemanwithoutexperiencecanhardlyrealizetheworkitwastogetthatbearskinoffthecarcassandthentopackit,wet,slippery,andheavy,sothatitwouldrideevenlyonthepony。Iwasatthetimefairlywellversedinpackingwitha“diamondhitch。”thestandbyofRockyMountainpackersinmyday;butthediamondhitchisatwo-manjob;andevenworkingwitha“squawhitch。”Igotintoendlesstroublewiththatwetandslipperybearskin。WithinfinitelaborIwouldgettheskinontheponyandruntheropesoverituntiltoallseemingitwasfastenedproperly。Thenoffwewouldstart,andaftergoingaboutahundredyardsIwouldnoticethehidebeginningtobulgethroughbetweentworopes。Iwouldshiftoneofthem,andthenthehidewouldbulgesomewhereelse。Iwouldshifttheropeagain;andstillthehidewouldflowslowlyoutasifitwaslava。ThefirstthingIknewitwouldcomedownononeside,andthelittlemare,withherfeetplantedresolutely,wouldwaitformetoperformmypartbygettingthatbearskinbackinitsproperplaceontheMcClellansaddlewhichI

  wasusingasamakeshiftpacksaddle。Thefeatofkillingthebearthepreviousdaysankintonothingcomparedwiththefeatofmakingthebearskinrideproperlyasapackonthefollowingthreedays。

  ThereasonwhyIwasaloneinthemountainsonthisoccasionwasbecause,fortheonlytimeinallmyexperience,Ihadadifficultywithmyguide。Hewasacrippledoldmountainman,withaprofoundcontemptfor“tenderfeet。”acontemptthatinmycasewasaccentuatedbythefactthatIworespectacles——whichatthatdayandinthatregionwereusuallyheldtoindicateadefectivemoralcharacterinthewearer。Hehadneverpreviouslyactedasguide,or,asheexpressedit,“trundledatenderfoot。”andthoughagoodhunter,whoshowedmemuchgame,ourexperiencetogetherwasnothappy。Hewasveryrheumaticandlikedtolieabedlate,sothatIusuallyhadtogetbreakfast,and,infact,domostoftheworkaroundcamp。Finallyonedayhedeclinedtogooutwithme,sayingthathehadapain。

  When,thatafternoon,Igotbacktocamp,Ispeedilyfoundwhatthe“pain“was。Weweretravelingverylightindeed,Ihavingpracticallynothingbutmybuffalosleeping-bag,mywashkit,andapairofsocks。

  Ihadalsotakenaflaskofwhiskyforemergencies——although,asI

  foundthattheemergenciesneveraroseandthatteawasbetterthanwhiskywhenamanwascoldordoneout,Iabandonedthepracticeoftakingwhiskyonhuntingtripstwentyyearsago。WhenIgotbacktocamptheoldfellowwassittingonatree-trunk,veryerect,withhisrifleacrosshisknees,andinresponsetomynodofgreetinghemerelyleeredatme。Ileanedmyrifleagainstatree,walkedovertowheremybedwaslying,and,happeningtorummageinitforsomething,Ifoundthewhiskyflaskwasempty。Iturnedonhimatonceandaccusedhimofhavingdrunkit,towhichhemerelyrespondedbyaskingwhatIwasgoingtodoaboutit。Theredidnotseemmuchtodo,soI

  saidthatwewouldpartcompany——wewereonlyfourorfivedaysfromasettlement——andIwouldgoinalone,takingoneofthehorses。HerespondedbycockinghisrifleandsayingthatIcouldgoaloneandbedamnedtome,butIcouldnottakeanyhorse。Ianswered“allright。”

  thatifIcouldnotIcouldnot,andbegantomovearoundtogetsomeflourandsaltpork。HewasmisledbymyquietnessandbythefactthatIhadnotinanywayresentedeitherhisactionsorhislanguageduringthedayswehadbeentogether,anddidnotwatchmeascloselyasheoughttohavedone。Hewassittingwiththecockedrifleacrosshisknees,themuzzletotheleft。Myriflewasleaningagainstatreenearthecookingthingstohisright。Managingtogetnearit,I

  whippeditupandthrewthebeadonhim,calling,“Handsup!”Heofcourseputuphishands,andthensaid,“Oh,come,Iwasonlyjoking“;

  towhichIanswered,“Well,Iamnot。Nowstraightenyourlegsandletyourriflegototheground。”Heremonstrated,sayingtheriflewouldgooff,andItoldhimtoletitgooff。However,hestraightenedhislegsinsuchfashionthatitcametothegroundwithoutajar。Ithenmadehimmoveback,andpickeduptherifle。Bythistimehewasquitesober,andreallydidnotseemangry,lookingatmequizzically。HetoldmethatifIwouldgivehimbackhisrifle,hewouldcallitquitsandwecouldgoontogether。Ididnotthinkitbesttotrusthim,soItoldhimthatourhuntwasprettywellthrough,anyway,andthatIwouldgohome。Therewasablastedpineonthetrail,inplainviewofthecamp,aboutamileoff,andItoldhimthatIwouldleavehisrifleatthatblastedpineifIcouldseehimincamp,butthathemustnotcomeafterme,forifhedidIshouldassumethatitwaswithhostileintentandwouldshoot。Hesaidhehadnointentionofcomingafterme;andashewasverymuchcrippledwithrheumatism,Ididnotbelievehewoulddoso。

  AccordinglyItookthelittlemare,withnothingbutsomeflour,bacon,andtea,andmybed-roll,andstartedoff。AttheblastedpineIlookedround,andasIcouldseehimincamp,Ilefthisriflethere。Ithentraveledtilldark,andthatnight,fortheonlytimeinmyexperience,Iusedincampingatrickoftheold-timetrappersintheIndiandays。IdidnotbelieveIwouldbefollowed,butstillitwasnotpossibletobesure,so,aftergettingsupper,whilemyponyfedround,Ileftthefireburning,repackedthemareandpushedaheaduntilitliterallybecamesodarkthatIcouldnotsee。ThenI

  picketedthemare,sleptwhereIwaswithoutafireuntilthefirststreakofdawn,andthenpushedonforacoupleofhoursbeforehaltingtotakebreakfastandtoletthelittlemarehaveagoodfeed。

  Noplainsmanneedstobetoldthatamanshouldnotlienearafireifthereisdangerofanenemycreepinguponhim,andthataboveallamanshouldnotputhimselfinapositionwherehecanbeambushedatdawn。OnthisseconddayIlostthetrail,andtowardnightfallgaveuptheefforttofindit,campedwhereIwas,andwentouttoshootagrouseforsupper。ItwaswhilehuntinginvainforagrousethatI

  cameonthebearandkilleditasabovedescribed。

  WhenIreachedthesettlementandwentintothestore,thestorekeeperidentifiedmebyremarking:“You’rethetenderfootthatoldHankwastrundling,ain’tyou?”IadmittedthatIwas。Agoodmanyyearslater,afterIhadbeenelectedVice-President,IwentonacougarhuntinnorthwesternColoradowithJohnnyGoff,afamoushunterandmountainman。Itwasmidwinter。Iwasratherproudofmyachievements,andpicturedmyselfasbeingknowntothefewsettlersintheneighborhoodasasuccessfulmountain-lionhunter。IcouldnothelpgrinningwhenI

  foundoutthattheydidnotevenalludetomeastheVice-President-

  elect,letaloneasahunter,butmerelyas“JohnnyGoff’stourist。”

  OfcourseduringtheyearswhenIwasmostbusyatseriousworkI

  coulddonohunting,andevenmyridingwasofadecorouskind。Butamanwhosebusinessissedentaryshouldgetsomekindofexerciseifhewishestokeephimselfinasgoodphysicaltrimashisbrethrenwhodomanuallabor。WhenIworkedonaranch,Ineedednoformofexerciseexceptmywork,butwhenIworkedinanofficethecasewasdifferent。

  AcoupleofsummersIplayedpolowithsomeofmyneighbors。Ishallalwaysbelieveweplayedpoloinjusttherightwayformiddle-agedmenwithstablesofthegeneralutilityorder。Ofcourseitwaspolowhichwaschieflyofinteresttoourselves,theonlyonlookersbeingthemembersofourfaithfulfamilies。Mytwoponiesweretheonlyoccupantsofmystableexceptacart-horse。MywifeandIrodeanddrovethem,andtheywereusedforhouseholderrandsandforthechildren,andfortwoafternoonsaweektheyservedmeaspoloponies。

  Poloisagoodgame,infinitelybetterforvigorousmenthantennisorgolforanythingofthatkind。Thereisallthefunoffootball,withthehorsethrownin;andifonlypeoplewouldbewillingtoplayitinsimplefashionitwouldbealmostasmuchwithintheirreachasgolf。

  ButatOysterBayourgreatandpermanentamusementswererowingandsailing;Idonotcareforthelatter,andamfondoftheformer。I

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