第81章
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  `Yourladyshipwillpardonmyfreedom,’Iremarked,inconclusion,`butitissaid,``bytheirfruitsyeshallknowthem。’’IamsuretheCount’sconstantkindnessandconstantattention,fromtheverybeginningofMissHalcombe’sillness,meritourbestconfidenceandesteem。Evenhislordship’sseriousmisunderstandingwithMrDawsonwasentirelyattributabletohisanxietyonMissHalcombe’saccount。’

  `Whatmisunderstanding?’inquiredherladyship,withalookofsuddeninterest。

  IrelatedtheunhappycircumstancesunderwhichMrDawsonhadwithdrawnhisattendance——mentioningthemallthemorereadilybecauseIdisapprovedofSirPercival’scontinuingtoconcealwhathadhappenedashehaddoneinmypresencefromtheknowledgeofLadyGlyde。

  Herladyshipstartedup,witheveryappearanceofbeingadditionallyagitatedandalarmedbywhatIhadtoldher。

  `Worse!worsethanIthought!’shesaid,walkingabouttheroom,inabewilderedmanner。`TheCountknewMrDawsonwouldneverconsenttoMarian’stakingajourney——hepurposelyinsultedthedoctortogethimoutofthehouse。’

  `Oh,mylady!mylady!’Iremonstrated。

  `MrsMichelson!’shewentonvehemently,`nowordsthateverwerespokenwillpersuademethatmysisterisinthatman’spowerandinthatman’shousewithherownconsent-Myhorrorofhimissuch,thatnothingSirPercivalcouldsay,andnolettersmyunclecouldwrite,wouldinduceme,ifIhadonlymyownfeelingstoconsult,toeat,drink,orsleepunderhisroof。ButmymiseryofsuspenseaboutMariangivesmethecouragetofollowheranywhere,tofollowherevenintoCountFosco’shouse。’

  Ithoughtitright,atthispoint,tomentionthatMissHalcombehadalreadygoneontoCumberland,accordingtoSirPercival’saccountofthematter。

  `Iamafraidtobelieveit!’answeredherladyship。`Iamafraidsheisstillinthatman’shouse。IfIamwrong,ifshehasreallygonetoLimmeridgeIamresolvedIwillnotsleeptomorrownightunderCountFosco’sroof。Mydearestfriendintheworld,nexttomysister,livesnearLondon。

  Youhaveheardme,youhaveheardMissHalcombe,speakofMrsVesey?I

  meantowrite,andproposetosleepatherhouse。Idon’tknowhowIshallgetthere——Idon’tknowhowIshallavoidtheCount——buttothatrefugeIwillescapeinsomeway,ifmysisterhasgonetoCumberland。AllIaskofyoutodo,istoseeyourselfthatmylettertoMrsVeseygoestoLondontonight,ascertainlyasSirPercival’slettergoestoCountFosco。Ihavereasonsfornottrustingthepost-bagdownstairs。Willyoukeepmysecret,andhelpmeinthis?itisthelastfavour,perhaps,thatIshalleveraskofyou。’

  Ihesitated,Ithoughtitallverystrange,Ialmostfearedthatherladyship’smindhadbeenalittleaffectedbyrecentanxietyandsuffering。

  Atmyownrisk,however,Iendedbygivingmyconsent。Iftheletterhadbeenaddressedtoastranger,ortoanyonebutaladysowellknowntomebyreportasMrsVesey,Imighthaverefused。IthankGod——lookingtowhathappenedafterwards——IthankGodIneverthwartedthatwish,oranyother,whichLadyGlydeexpressedtome,onthelastdayofherresidenceatBlackwaterPark。

  Theletterwaswrittenandgivenintomyhands。Imyselfputitintothepost-boxinthevillagethatevening。

  WesawnothingmoreofSirPercivalfortherestoftheday。

  Islept,byLadyGlyde’sowndesire,inthenextroomtohers,withthedooropenbetweenus。Therewassomethingsostrangeanddreadfulinthelonelinessandemptinessofthehouse,thatIwasglad,onmyside,tohaveacompanionnearme。Herladyshipsatuplate,readinglettersandburningthem,andemptyingherdrawersandcabinetsoflittlethingssheprized,asifsheneverexpectedtoreturntoBlackwaterPark。Hersleepwassadlydisturbedwhensheatlastwenttobed——shecriedoutinitseveraltimes,oncesoloudthatshewokeherself。Whateverherdreamswere,shedidnotthinkfittocommunicatethemtome。Perhaps,inmysituation,Ihadnorighttoexpectthatsheshoulddoso。Itmatterslittlenow。

  Iwassorryforher,Iwasindeedheartilysorryforherallthesame。

  Thenextdaywasfineandsunny。SirPercivalcameup,afterbreakfast,totellusthatthechaisewouldbeatthedoorataquartertotwelve——thetraintoLondonstoppingatourstationattwentyminutesafter。

  HeinformedLadyGlydethathewasobligedtogoout,butaddedthathehopedtobebackbeforesheleft。Ifanyunforeseenaccidentdelayedhim,Iwastoaccompanyhertothestation,andtotakespecialcarethatshewasintimeforthetrain。SirPercivalcommunicatedthesedirectionsveryhastily——walkinghereandthereabouttheroomallthetime。Herladyshiplookedattentivelyafterhimwhereverhewent。Heneveroncelookedatherinreturn。

  Sheonlyspokewhenhehaddone,andthenshestoppedhimasheapproachedthedoor,byholdingoutherhand。

  `Ishallseeyounomore,’shesaid。inaverymarkedmanner。`Thisisourparting——ourparting,itmaybeforever。Willyoutrytoforgiveme,Percival,asheartilyasIforgiveyou?’

  Hisfaceturnedofanawfulwhitenessallover,andgreatbeadsofperspirationbrokeoutonhisbaldforehead。`Ishallcomeback,’hesaid,andmadeforthedoor,ashastilyasifhiswife’sfarewellwordshadfrightenedhimoutoftheroom。

  IhadneverlikedSirPercival,butthemannerinwhichheleftLadyGlydemademefeelashamedofhavingeatenhisbreadandlivedinhisservice。

  IthoughtofsayingafewcomfortingandChristianwordstothepoorlady,buttherewassomethinginherface,asshelookedafterherhusbandwhenthedoorclosedonhim,thatmademealtermymindandkeepsilenceAtthetimenamedthechaisedrewupatthegates。Herladyshipwasright——SirPercivalnevercameback。Iwaitedforhimtillthelastmoment,andwaitedinvain。

  Nopositiveresponsibilitylayonmyshoulders,andyetIdidnotfeeleasyinmymind。`Itisofyourownfreewill,’Isaid,asthechaisedrovethroughthelodge-gates,`thatyourladyshipgoestoLondon?’

  `Iwillgoanywhere,’sheanswered,`toendthedreadfulsuspensethatIamsufferingatthismoment。’

  ShehadmademefeelalmostasanxiousandasuncertainaboutMissHalcombeasshefeltherself。Ipresumedtoaskhertowritemealine,ifallwentwellinLondon。Sheanswered,`Mostwillingly,MrsMichelson。’

  `Weallhaveourcrossestobear,mylady,’Isaid,seeinghersilentandthoughtful,aftershehadpromisedtowrite。

  Shemadenoreply——sheseemedtobetoomuchwrappedupinherownthoughtstoattendtome。

  `Ifearyourladyshiprestedbadlylastnight,’Iremarked,afterwaitingalittle。

  `Yes,’shesaid,Iwasterriblydisturbedbydreams。’

  `Indeed,mylady?’Ithoughtshewasgoingtotellmeherdreams,butno,whenshespokenextitwasonlytoaskaquestion。

  `YoupostedthelettertoMrsVeseywithyourownhands?’

  `Yes,myLady。’

  `DidSirPercivalsay,yesterday,thatCountFoscowastomeetmeattheterminusinLondon?’

  `Hedid,mylady。’

  ShesighedheavilywhenIansweredthatlastquestion,andsaidnomore。

  Wearrivedatthestation,withhardlytwominutestospare。Thegardenerwhohaddrivenusmanagedabouttheluggage,whileItooktheticket。

  ThewhistleofthetrainwassoundingwhenIjoinedherladyshipontheplatform。Shelookedverystrangely,andpressedherhandoverherheart,asifsomesuddenpainorfrighthadovercomeheratthatmoment。

  `Iwishyouweregoingwithme!’shesaid,catchingeagerlyatmyarmwhenIgavehertheticket。

  Iftherehadbeentime,ifIhadfeltthedaybeforeasIfeltthen,Iwouldhavemademyarrangementstoaccompanyher,eventhoughthedoingsohadobligedmetogiveSirPercivalwarningonthespot。Asitwas,herwishes,expressedatthelastmomentonly,wereexpressedtoolateformetocomplywiththem。SheseemedtounderstandthisherselfbeforeIcouldexplainit,anddidnotrepeatherdesiretohavemeforatravellingcompanion。Thetraindrewupattheplatform。Shegavethegardenerapresentforhischildren,andtookmyhand,inhersimpleheartymanner,beforeshegotintothecarriage。

  `Youhavebeenverykindtomeandtomysister,’shesaid——`kindwhenwewerebothfriendless。Ishallrememberyougratefully,aslongasIlivetorememberanyone。Good-bye——andGodblessyou!’

  Shespokethosewordswithatoneandalookwhichbroughtthetearsintomyeyes——shespokethemasifshewasbiddingmefarewellforever。

  `Good-bye,mylady,’Isaid,puttingherintothecarriage,andtryingtocheerher;`good-bye,forthepresentonly;good-bye,withmybestandkindestwishesforhappiertimes。’

  Sheshookherhead,andshudderedasshesettledherselfinthecarriage。

  Theguardclosedthedoor。`Doyoubelieveindreams?’shewhisperedtomeatthewindow。`Mydreams,lastnight,weredreamsIhaveneverhadbefore。Theterrorofthemishangingovermestill。’ThewhistlesoundedbeforeIcouldanswer,andthetrainmoved。Herpalequietfacelookedatmeforthelasttime——lookedsorrowfullyandsolemnlyfromthewindow。

  Shewavedherhand,andIsawhernomore。

  Towardsfiveo’clockontheafternoonofthatsameday,havingalittletimetomyselfinthemidstofthehouseholddutieswhichnowpresseduponme,Isatdownaloneinmyownroom,totryandcomposemymindwiththevolumeofmyhusband’sSermons。ForthefirsttimeinmylifeIfoundmyattentionwanderingoverthosepiousandcheeringwords。ConcludingthatLadyGlyde’sdeparturemusthavedisturbedmefarmoreseriouslythanI

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