第20章
加入书架 A- A+
点击下载App,搜索"Ulysses(尤利西斯)",免费读到尾

  J。J。O’MOLLOYHotlytothepopulace。Thisisalonehandfight。ByHades,Iwillnothaveanyclientofminegaggedandbadgeredinthisfashionbyapackofcursandlaughinghyenas。TheMosaiccodehassupersededthelawofthejungle。IsayitandIsayitemphaticallywithoutwishingforonemomenttodefeattheendsofjustice,accusedwasnotaccessorybeforetheactandprosecutrixhasnotbeentamperedwith。Theyoungpersonwastreatedbydefendantasifshewerehisveryowndaughter。BloomtakesJ。J。O’Molloy’shandandraisesittohislips。Ishallcallrebuttingevidencetoproveuptothehiltthatthehiddenhandisagainatitsoldgame。WhenindoubtpersecuteBloom。Myclient,aninnatelybashfulman,wouldbethelastmanintheworldtodoanythingungentlemanlywhichinjuredmodestycouldobjecttoorcastastoneatagirlwhotookthewrongturningwhensomedastard,responsibleforhercondition,hadworkedhisownsweetwillonher。Hewantstogostraight。IregardhimasthewhitestmanIknow。HeisdownonhisluckatpresentowingtothemortgagingofhisextensivepropertyatAgendathNetaiminfarawayAsiaMinor,slidesofwhichwillnowbeshown。ToBloom。Isuggestthatyouwilldothehandsomething。

  BLOOMApennyinthepound。

  ThemirageofthelakeofKinnerethwithblurredcattlecroppinginsilverhazeisprojectedonthewall。MosesDlugacz,ferreteyedalbino,inbluedungarees,standsupinthegallery,holdingineachhandanorangecitronandaporkkidney。

  DLUGACZHoarsely。Bleibtreustrasse,Berlin,W。13。

  J。J。O’Molloystepsontoalowplinthandholdsthelapelofhiscoatwithsolemnity。Hisfacelengthens,growspaleandbearded,withsunkeneyes,theblotchesofphthisisandhecticcheekbonesofJohnF。Taylor。Heapplieshishandkerchieftohismouthandscrutinisesthegallopingtideofrosepinkblood。

  J。J。O’MOLLOYAlmostvoicelessly。Excuseme,Iamsufferingfromaseverechill,haverecentlycomefromasickbed。Afewwellchosenwords。Heassumestheavinehead,foxymoustacheandproboscidaleloquenceofSeymourBushe。Whentheangel’sbookcomestobeopenedifaughtthatthepensivebosomhasinauguratedofsoultransfiguredandofsoultransfiguringdeservestoliveIsayaccordtheprisoneratthebarthesacredbenefitofthedoubt。Apaperwithsomethingwrittenonitishandedintocourt。

  BLOOMIncourtdress。Cangivebestreferences。MessrsCallan,Coleman。MrWisdomHelyJ。P。MyoldchiefJoeCuffe。MrV。B。Dillon,ex-lordmayorofDublin。Ihavemovedinthecharmedcircleofthehighest。QueensofDublinSociety。Carelessly。Iwasjustchattingthisafternoonattheviceregallodgetomyoldpals,sirRobertandladyBall,astronomerroyal,atthelevee。SirBob,Isaid……

  MRSYELVERTONBARRYInlowcorsagedopalballdressandelbowlengthivorygloves,wearingasabletrimmedbrickquilteddolman,acombofbrilliantsandpanacheofospreyinherhair。Arresthimconstable。HewrotemeananonymousletterinprenticebackhandwhenmyhusbandwasintheNorthRidingofTipperaryontheMunstercircuit,signedJamesLovebirch。HesaidthathehadseenfromthegodsmypeerlessglobesasIsatinaboxoftheTheatreRoyalatacommandperformanceofLaCigale。Ideeplyinflamedhim,hesaid。Hemadeimproperoverturestometomisconductmyselfathalfpastfourp。m。onthefollowingThursday,Dunsinktime。HeofferedtosendmethroughthepostaworkoffictionbyMonsieurPauldeKock,entitledTheGirlwiththeThreePairsofStays。

  MRSBELLINGHAMIncapandsealconeymantle,wrappeduptothenose,stepsoutofherbroughamandscansthroughtortoiseshellquizzingglasseswhichshetakesfrominsideherhugeopossummuff。Alsotome。Yes,Ibelieveitisthesameobjectionableperson。BecauseheclosedmycarriagedooroutsidesirThornleyStoker’sonesleetydayduringthecoldsnapofFebruaryninetythreewheneventhegridofthewastepipeandballstopinmybathcisternwerefrozen。Subsequentlyheenclosedabloomofedelweissculledontheheights,ashesaid,inmyhonour。Ihaditexaminedbyabotanicalexpertandelicitedtheinformationthatitwasablossomofthehomegrownpotatoplantpurloinedfromaforcingcaseofthemodelfarm。

  MRSYELVERTONBARRYShameonhim!

  Acrowdofslutsandragamuffinssuesforward。

  THESLUTSANDRAGAMUFFINSScreaming。Stopthief!Hurrahthere,Bluebeard!ThreecheersforIkeyMo!

  SECONDWATCHProduceshandcuffs。Herearethedarbies。

  MRSBELLINGHAMHeaddressedmeinseveralhandwritingswithfulsomecomplimentsasaVenusinfursandallegedprofoundpityformyfrostboundcoachmanBalmerwhileinthesamebreathheexpressedhimselfasenviousofhisearflapsandfleecysheepskinsandofhisfortunateproximitytomyperson,whenstandingbehindmychairwearingmyliveryandthearmorialbearingsoftheBellinghamescutcheongarnishedsable,abuck’sheadcoupedor。Helaudedalmostextravagantlymynetherextremities,myswellingcalvesinsilkhosedrawnuptothelimit,andeulogisedglowinglymyotherhiddentreasuresinpricelesslacewhich,hesaid,hecouldconjureup。Heurgedme,statingthathefeltithismissioninlifetourgeme,todefilethemarriagebed,tocommitadulteryattheearliestpossibleopportunity。

  THEHONOURABLEMRSMERVYNTALBOYSInamazoncostume,hardhat,jackbootscockspurred,vermilionwaistcoat,fawnmusketeergauntletswithbraideadrums,longtrainheldupandhuntingcropwithwhichshestrikesherweltconstantly。Alsome。BecausehesawmeonthepologroundofthePhnixparkatthematchAllIrelandversustheRestofIreland。Myeyes,Iknow,shonedivinelyasIwatchedCaptainSloggerDennehyoftheInniskillingswinthefinalchukkaronhisdarlingcobCentaur。ThisplebeianDonJuanobservedmefrombehindahackneycarandsentmeindoubleenvelopesanobscenephotograph,suchasaresoldafterdarkonParisboulevards,insultingtoanylady。Ihaveitstill。Itrepresentsapartiallynudesenorita,frailandlovelyhiswifeashesolemnlyassuredme,takenbyhimfromnature,practisingillicitintercoursewithamusculartorero,evidentlyablackguard。Heurgedmetodolikewise,tomisbehave,tosinwithofficersofthegarrison。Heimploredmetosoilhisletterinanunspeakablemanner,tochastisehimasherichlydeserves,tobestrideandridehim,togivehimamostvicioushorsewhipping。

  MRSBELLINGHAMMetoo。

  MRSYELVERTONBARRYMetoo。

  SeveralhighlyrespectableDublinladiesholdupimproperlettersreceivedfromBloom。

  THEHONOURABLEMRSMERVYNTALBOYSStampsherjinglingspursinasuddenparoxysmofsuddenfury。Iwill,bytheGodaboveme。I’llscourgethepigeonliveredcuraslongasIcanstandoverhim。I’llflayhimalive。

  BLOOMHiseyesclosing,quailsexpectantly。Here?Hesquirms。Again!Hepantscringing。Ilovethedanger。

  THEHONOURABLEMRSMERVYNTALBOYSVerymuchso!I’llmakeithotforyou。I’llmakeyoudanceJackLattenforthat。

  MRSBELLINGHAMTanhisbreechwell,theupstart!Writethestarsandstripesonit!

  MRSYELVERTONBARRYDisgraceful!There’snoexcuseforhim!Amarriedman!

  BLOOMAllthesepeople。Imeantonlythespankingidea。Awarmtinglingglowwithouteffusion。Refinedbirchingtostimulatethecirculation。

  THEHONOURABLEMRSMERVYNTALBOYSLaughsderisively。O,didyou,myfinefellow?Well,bythelivingGod,you’llgetthesurpriseofyourlifenow,believeme,themostunmercifulhidingamaneverbargainedfor。Youhavelashedthedormanttigressinmynatureintofury。

  MRSBELLINGHAMShakeshermuffandquizzing-glassesvindictively。Makehimsmart,Hannadear。Givehimginger。Thrashthemongrelwithinaninchofhislife。Thecat-o’nine-tails。Geldhim。Vivisecthim。

  BLOOMShuddering,shrinking,joinshishandswithhangdogmien。Ocold!Oshivery!Itwasyourambrosialbeauty。Forget,forgive。Kismet。Letmeoffthisonce。Heofferstheothercheek。

  MRSYELVERTONBARRYSeverely。Don’tdosoonanyaccount,MrsTalboys!Heshouldbesoundlytrounced!

  THEHONOURABLEMRSMERVYNTALBOYSUnbuttoninghergauntletviolently。I’lldonosuchthing。Pigdogandalwayswaseversincehewaspupped!Todareaddressme!I’llfloghimblackandblueinthepublicstreets。I’lldigmyspursinhimuptotherowel。Heisawellknowncuckold。Sheswishesherhuntingcropsavagelyintheair。Takedownhistrouserswithoutlossoftime。Comehere,sir!Quick!Ready?

  BLOOMTrembling,beginningtoobey。Theweatherhasbeensowarm。

  DavyStephens,ringleted,passeswithabevyofbarefootnewsboys。

  DAVYSTEPHENSMessengeroftheSacredHeartandEveningTelegraphwithSaintPatrick’sDaySupplement。ContainingthenewaddressesofallthecuckoldsinDublin。

  TheveryreverendCanonO’Hanloninclothofgoldcopeelevatesandexposesamarbletimepiece。BeforehimFatherConroyandthereverendJohnHughesS。J。bendlow。

  THETIMEPIECEUnportalling。

  Cuckoo

  Cuckoo

  Cuckoo

  Thebrassquoitsofabedareheardtojingle。

  THEQUOITSJigjag,Jigajiga。Jigjag。

  Apaneloffogrollsbackrapidly,revealingrapidlyinthejuryboxthefacesofMartinCunningham,foremansilkhatted,JackPowerSimonDedalus,TomKernan,NedLambert,JohnHenryMenton,MylesCrawford,Lenehan,PaddyLeonardNoseyFlynn,M’CoyandthefeaturelessfaceofaNamelessOne。

  THENAMELESSONEBarebackriding。Weightforage。Gob,heorganisedher。

  THEJURORSAlltheirheadsturnedtohisvoice。Really?

  THENAMELESSONESnarls。Arseovertip。Hundredshillingstofive。

  THEJURORSAlltheirheadsloweredinassent。Mostofusthoughtasmuch。

  FIRSTWATCHHeisamarkedman。Anothergirl’splaitcut。Wanted:JacktheRipper。Athousandpoundsreward。

  SECONDWATCHAwed,whispers。Andinblack。Amormon。Anarchist。

  THECRIERLoudly。WhereasLeopoldBloomofnofixedabodeisawell-knowndynamitard,forger,bigamist,bawdandcuckoldadapublicnuisancetothecitizensofDublinandwhereasatthiscommissionofassizesthemosthonourable。

  HisHonoursirFrederickFalkinerrecorderofDublin,injudicialgarbofgreystonerisesfromthebench,stonebearded。Hebearsinhisarmsanumbrellasceptre。FromhisforeheadarisestarklytheMosaicramshorns。

  THERECORDERIwillputanendtothiswhiteslavetrafficandridDublinofthisodiouspest。Scandalous!Hedonstheblackcap。Lethimbetaken,MrSubsheriff,fromthedockwherehenowstandsanddetainedincustodyinMountjoyprisonduringHisMajesty’spleasureandtherebehangedbytheneckuntilheisdeadandthereinfailnotatyourperilormaytheLordhave-mercyonyoursoul。Removehim。Ablackskullcapdescendsuponhishead。

  ThesubsherifflongJohnFanningappears,smokingapungentHenryClay。

  LONGJOHNFANNINGScowlsandcallswithrichrollingutterance。Who’llhangJudasIscariot?

  H。Rumbold,masterbarberinabloodcolouredjerkinandtanner’sapron,aropecoiledoverhisshouldermountstheblock。Alifepreserverandanailstuddedbludgeonarestuckinhisbelt。Herubsgrimlyhisgrappinghands,knobbedwithknuckledusters。

  RUMBOLDTotherecorderwithsinisterfamiliarity。HangingHarry,yourMajesty,theMerseyterror。Fiveguineasajugular。Neckornothing。

  ThebellsofGeorge’schurchtollslowly,louddarkiron。

  THEBELLSHeigho!Heigho!

  BLOOMDesperately。Wait。Stop。Gulls。Goodheart。Isaw。Innocence。Girlinthemonkeyhouse。Zoo。Lewdchimpanzees。Breathlessly。Pelvicbasin。Herartlessblushunmannedme。Overcomewithemotion。Ilefttheprecincts。Heturnstoafigureinthecrowd,appealing。Hynes,mayIspeaktoyou?Youknowme。Thatthreeshillingsyoucankeep。Ifyouwantalittlemore。

  HYNESColdly。Youareaperfectstranger。

  SECONDWATCHPointstothecorner。Thebombishere。FIRSTWATCHInfernalmachinewithatimefuse。BLOOMNo,no。Pig’sfeet。Iwasatafuneral。FIRSTWATCHDrawshistruncheon。Liar!

  Thebeagleliftshissnout,showingthegreyscorbuticfaceofPaddyDignam。Hehasgnawedall。Heexhalesaputridcarcasefedbreath。Hegrowstohumansizeandshape。Hisdachshundcoatbecomesabrownmortuaryhabit。Hisgreeneyeflashesbloodshot。Halfofoneearallthenoseandboththumbsareghouleaten。

  PADDYDIGNAMInahollowvoice。Itistrue。Itwasmyfuneral。DoctorFinucanepronouncedlifeextinctwhenIsuccumbedtothediseasefromnaturalcauses。

  Heliftshismutilatedashenfacemoonwardsandbayslugubriously。

  BLOOMIntriumph。Youhear?

  PADDYDIGNAMBloom,IamPaddyDignam’sspirit。List,list,Olist!

  BLOOMThevoiceisthevoiceofEsau。

  SECONDWATCHBlesseshimself。Howisthatpossible?

  FIRSTWATCHItisnotinthepennycatechism。

  PADDYDIGNAMBymetempsychosis。Spooks。

  AVOICEOrocks。

  PADDYDIGNAMEarnestly。OnceIwasintheemployofMrJ。H。Menton,solicitor,commissionerforoathsandaffidavits,of27Bachelor’sWalk。NowIamdefunct,thewallofthehearthypertrophied。Hardlines。Thepoorwifewasawfullycutup。Dowisshebearingit?Keepheroffthatbottleofsherry。Helooksroundhim。Alamp。Imustsatisfyananimalneed。Thatbuttermilkdidn’tagreewithme。

  TheportlyfigureofJohnO’Connell,caretakerstandsforth,holdingabunchofkeystiedwithcrape。BesidehimstandsFatherCoffey,chaplain,toadbellied,wrynecked,inasurpliceandbandannanightcap,holdingsleepilyastaffoftwistedpoppies。

  FATHERCOFFEYYawns,thenchantswithahoarsecroak。Namine。JacobsVobiscuits。Amen。

  Foghornsstormilythroughhismegaphone。Dignam,PatrickT。,deceased。

  PADDYDIGNAMWithprickedupears,winces。Overtones。

  Hewrigglesforward,placesaneartotheground。Mymasters’voice!

  JOHNO’CONNELLBurialdocketletternumberU。P。Eightyfivethousand。Fieldseventeen。HouseofKeys。Plot,onehundredandone。

  PaddyDignamlistenswithvisibleeffort,thinking,histailstiffpointed,hisearscocked。

  PADDYDIGNAMPrayforthereposeofhissoul。

  Hewormsdownthroughacoalhole,hisbrownhabittrailingitstetheroverrattlingpebbles。Afterhimtoddlesanobesegrandfatherratonfungusturtlepawsunderagreycarapace。Dignam’svoice,muffled,isheardbayingunderground:Dignam’sdeadandgonebelow。TomRochford,robinredbreasted,incapandbreeches,jumpsfromhistwo-columnedmachine。

  TOMROCHFORDAhandtohisbreastbone,bows。ReubenJ。AflorinIfindhim。Hefixesthemanholewitharesolutestare。Myturnnowon。FollowmeuptoCarlow。

  Heexecutesadaredevilsalmonleapintheairandisengulfedinthecoalhole。Twodiscsonthecolumnswobbleeyesofnought。Allrecedes。Bloomplodgesforwardagain。Hestandsbeforealightedhouse,listening。Thekisses,wingingfromtheirbowers,flyabouthim,twittering,warbling,cooing。

  THEKISSESWarbling。Leo!Twittering。IckylickymickystickyforLeo!Cooing。Coocoocoo!YummyummWomworn!Warbling。Bigcomebig!Pirouette!Leopopold!Twittering。Leeolee!Warbling。OLeo!

  Theyrustle,flutteruponhisgarments,alight,brightgiddyflecks,silverysequins。

  BLOOMAman’stouch。Sadmusic。Churchmusic。Perhapshere。

  ZoeHiggins,ayoungwhoreinasapphireslip,closedwiththreebronzebuckles,aslimblackvelvetfilletroundherthroat,nods,tripsdownthestepsandaccostshim。

  ZOEAreyoulookingforsomeone?He’sinsidewithhisfriend。

  BLOOMIsthisMrsMack’s?

  ZOENo,eightyone。MrsCohen’s。Youmightgofartherandfareworse。MotherSlipperslapper。Familiarly。She’sonthejobherselftonightwiththevet,hertipster,thatgivesherallthewinnersandpaysforhersoninOxford。Workingovertimebutherluck’sturnedtoday。Suspiciously。You’renothisfather,areyou?

  BLOOMNotI!

  ZOEYoubothinblack。Haslittlemouseyanyticklestonight?

  Hisskin,alert,feelsherfingertipsapproach。Ahandslidesoverhisleftthigh。

  ZOEHow’sthenuts?

  BLOOMOffside。Curiouslytheyareontheright。HeavierIsuppose。Oneinamillionmytailor,Mesias,says。

  ZOEInsuddenalarm。You’veahardchancre。

  BLOOMNotlikely。

  ZOEIfeelit。

  Herhandslidesintohislefttrouserpocketandbringsoutahardblackshrivelledpotato。SheregardsitandBloomwithdumbmoistlips。

  BLOOMAtalisman。Heirloom。

  ZOEForZoe?Forkeeps?Forbeingsonice,eh?

  Sheputsthepotatogreedilyintoapocket,thenlinkshisarm,cuddlinghimwithsupplewarmth。Hesmilesuneasily。Slowly,notebynote,orientalmusicisplayed。Hegazesinthetawnycrystalofhereyes,ringedwithkohol。Hissmilesoftens。

  ZOEYou’llknowmethenexttime。

  BLOOMForlornly。Ineverlovedadeargazellebutitwassureto。

  Gazellesareleaping,feedingonthemountains。Neararelakes。Roundtheirshoresfileshadowsblackofcedargroves。Aromarises,astronghairgrowthofresin。Itburns,theorient,askyofsapphire,cleftbythebronzeflightofeagles。Underitliesthewomancity,nude,white,still,cool,inluxury。Afountainmurmursamongdamaskroses。Mammothrosesmurmurofscarletwinegrapes。Awineofshame,lust,bloodexudes,strangelymurmuring。

  ZOEMurmuringsingsongwiththemusic,herodalisklipslusciouslysmearedwithsalveofswinefatandrosewater。Schorachaniwenowach,benoithHierushaloim。

  BLOOMFascinated。Ithoughtyouwereofgoodstockbyyouraccent。

  ZOEAndyouknowwhatthoughtdid?

  Shebiteshiseargentlywithlittlegoldstoppedteethsendingonhimacloyingbreathofstalegarlic。Therosesdrawapart,discloseasepulchreofthegoldofkingsandtheirmoulderingbones。

  BLOOMDrawsback,mechanicallycaressingherrightbubwithaflatawkwardhand。AreyouaDublingirl?

  ZOECatchesastrayhairdeftlyandtwistsittohercoil。Nobloodyfear。I’mEnglish。Haveyouaswaggerroot?

  BLOOMAsbefore。Rarelysmoke,dear。Cigarnowandthen。Childishdevice。Lewdly。Themouthcanbebetterengagedthanwithacylinderofrankweed。

  ZOEGoon。Makeastumpspeechoutofit。

  BLOOMInworkman’scorduroyoveralls,blackgansywithredfloatingtieandapachecap。Mankindisincorrigible。SirWalterRaleighbroughtfromthenewworldthatpotatoandthatweed,theoneakillerofpestilencebyabsorption,theotherapoisoneroftheear,eye,heart,memory,will,understanding,all。Thatistosay,hebroughtthepoisonahundredyearsbeforeanotherpersonwhosenameIforgetbroughtthefood。Suicide。Lies。Allourhabits。Why,lookatourpubliclife!

  Midnightchimesfromdistantsteeples。

  THECHIMESTurnagain,Leopold!LordMayorofDublin!

  BLOOMInalderman’sgownandchain。ElectorsofArranQuay,InnsQuay,Rotunda,MountjoyandNorthDock,betterrunatramline,Isay,fromthecattlemarkettotheriver。That’sthemusicofthefuture。That’smyprogramme。CuiBono?ButourbuccaneeringVanderdeckensintheirphantomshipoffinance……

  ANELECTORThreetimesthreeforourfuturechiefmagistrate!

  Theauroraborealisofthetorchlightprocessionleaps。

  THETORCHBEARERSHooray!

  Severalwellknownburgesses,citymagnatesandfreemenofthecityshakehandswithBloomandcongratulatehim。TimothyHarrington,latethriceLordMayorofDublin,imposinginmayoralscarlet,goldchainandwhitesilktie,conferswithcouncillorLorcanSherlock,locumtenens。Theynodvigorouslyinagreement。

  LATELORDMAYORHARRINGTONInscarletrobewithmace,goldmayoralchainandlacewhitesilkscarfThataldermansirLeoBloom’sspeechbeprintedattheexpenseoftheratepayers。ThatthehouseinwhichhewasbornbeornamentedwithacommemorativetabletandthatthethoroughfarehithertoknownasCowParlouroffCorkstreetbehenceforthdesignatedBoulevardBloom。

  COUNCILLORLORCANSHERLOCKCarriedunanimously。

  BLOOMImpassionedly。TheseflyingDutchmenorlyingDutchmenastheyreclineintheirupholsteredpoop,castingdice,whatreckthey?Machinesistheircry,theirchimera,theirpanacea。Laboursavingapparatuses,supplanters,bug-bears,manufacturedmonstersformutualmurder,hideoushobgoblinsproducedbyahordeofcapitalisticlustsuponourprostitutedlabour。Thepoormanstarveswhiletheyaregrassingtheirroyalmountainstagsorshootingpeasantsandphartridgesintheirpurblindpompofpelfandpower。Buttheirreignisroverforreverandeverandev……

  Prolongedapplause。Venetianmasts,maypolesandfestalarchesspringup。AstreamerbearingthelegendsCeadMilleFailteandMahTtobMelekIsraelspansthestreet。Allthewindowsarethrongedwithsightseers,chieflyladies。AlongtheroutetheregimentsoftheroyalDublinFusiliers,theKingsOwnScottishBoraerers,theCameronHighlandersandtheWelshFusiliers,standingtoattention,keepbackthecrowd。BoysfromHighschoolareperchedonthelampposts,telegraphpoles,windowsills,cornices,gutters,chimneypots,railings,rainspouts,whistlingandcheering。Thepillarofthecloudappears。AfifeanddrumbandisheardinthedistanceplayingtheKolNidre。Thebeatersapproachwithimperialeagleshoisted,trailingbannersandwavingorientalpalms。Thechryselephantinepapalstandardriseshigh,surroundedbypennonsofthecivicflag。ThevanoftheprocessionappearsheadedbyJohnHowardParnell,citymarshal,inachessboardtabard,theAthlonePoursuivantandUlsterKingofArms。TheyarefollowedbytheRightHonourableJosephHutchinson,lordmayorofDublin,thelordmayorofCork,theirworshipsthemayorsofLimerick,Galway,SligoandWatedord,twentyeightIrishrepresentativepeers,sirdars,grandeesandmaharajahsbearingtheclothofestate,theDublinMetropolitanFireBrigade,thechapterofthesaintsoffinanceintheirplutocraticorderofprecedence,thebishopofDownandConnorHisEminenceMichaelcardinalLoguearchbishopofArmagh,primateofallIreland,HisGrace,themostreverendDrWilliamAlexanderarchbishopofArmagh,primateofallIreland,thechiefrabbi,thepresbyterianmoderator,theheadsofthebaptist,anabaptist,methodistandMoravianchapelsandthehonorarysecretaryofthesocietyoffriends。herthemmarchtheguildsandtradesandtrainbandswithflyingcolours:coopen,birdfanciers,millwrights,newspapercanvassers,lawscriveners,masseurs,vintners,trussmakers,chimneysweeps,lardrefiners,tabinetandpoplinweavers,farriers,Italianwarehousemen,churchdecorators,bootjackmanufacturers,undertaken,silkmercers,lapidaries,salesmasters,corkcutters,assessorsoffirelosses,dyersandcleaners,exportbottlers,fellmongers,ticketwriters,heraldicsealengravers,horserepositoryhands,bullionbroken,cricketandarcheryoutfitters,riddlemakers,eggandpotatofactors,hosiersandglovers,plumbingcontractors。AfterthemmarchgentlemenofthebedchamberBlackRod,DeputyGarterGoldStick,themasterofhone,thelordgreatchamberlain,theearlmarshal,thehighconstablecarryingtheswordofstate,saintStephen’sironcrown,thechaliceandbible。Fourbuglersonfootblowasennet。Beefeatenreply,windingclarionsofwelcome。UnderanarchoftriumphBloomappearsbareheaded,inacrimsonvelvetmantletrimmedwithermine,bearingSaintEdward’sstafftheorbandsceptrewiththedove,thecurtana。Heisseatedonamilkwhitehonewithlongflowingcrimsontail,richlycaparisoned,withgoldenheadstall。Wildexcitement。Theladiesfromtheirbalconiesthrowdownrosepetals。Theairisperfumedwithessences。Themencheer。Bloom’sboysrunamidthebystanderswithbranchesofhawthornandwrenbushes。

  BLOOM’SBOYS

  Thewren,thewren,

  Thekingofallbirds,

  SaintStephen’shisday,

  Wascaughtinthefurze。

  ABLACKSMITHMurmurs。FortheHonourofGod!AndisthatBloom?Hescarcelylooksthirtyone。

  APAVIORANDFLAGGERThat’sthefamousBloomnow,theworld’sgreatestreformer。Hatsoff!

  Alluncovertheirheads。Womenwhispereagerly。

  AMILLIONAIRESSRichly。Isn’thesimplywonderful?

  ANOBLEWOMANNobly。Allthatmanhasseen!

  AFEMINISTMasculinely。Anddone!

  ABELLHANGERAclassicface!Hehastheforeheadofathinker。

  Bloom’sweather。Asunburstappearsinthenorthwest。

  THEBISHOPOFDOWNANDCONNORIherepresentyourundoubtedemperorpresidentandkingchairman,themostsereneandpotentandverypuissantrulerofthisrealm。GodsaveLeopoldtheFirst!

  ALLGodsaveLeopoldtheFirst!

  BLOOMIndalmaticandpurplemantle,tothebishopofDownandConnorwithdignity。Thanks,somewhateminentsir。

  WILLIAM,ARCHBISHOPOFARMAGHInpurplestockandshovelhat。WillyoutoyourpowercauselawandmercytobeexecutedinallyourjudgmentsinIrelandandterritoriesthereuntobelonging?

  BLOOMPlacinghisrighthandonhistesticles,swears。SomaytheCreatordealwithme。AllthisIpromisetodo。

  MICHAEL,ARCHBISHOPOFARMAGHPoursacruseofhairoiloverBloom’shead。Gaudiummagnumannuntiovobis。Habemuscarneficem。Leopold,Patrick,Andrew,David,George,bethouanointed!

  Bloomassumesamantleofclothofgoldandputsonarubyring。Heascendsandstandsonthestoneofdestiny。Therepresentativepeersputonatthesametimetheirtwentyeightcrowns。JoybellsringinChristchurch,SaintPatrick’s,George’sandgayMalahide。Mirusbazaarfireworksgoupfromallsideswithsymbolicalphallopyrotechnicdesigns。Thepeersdohomage,onebyone,approachingandgenuflecting。

  THEPEERSIdobecomeyourliegemanoflifeandlimbtoearthlyworship。

  BloomholdsuphisrighthandonwhichsparklestheKoh-i-Noordiamond。Hispalfreyneighs。Immediatesilence。Wirelessintercontinentalandinterplanetarytransmittersaresetforreceptionofmessage。

  BLOOMMysubjects!WeherebynominateourfaithfulchargerCopulaFelixhereditaryGrandVizierandannouncethatwehavethisdayrepudiatedourformerspouseandhavebestowedourroyalhandupontheprincessSelene,thesplendourofnight。

  TheformermorganaticspouseofBloomishastilyremovedintheBlackMaria。TheprincessSelene,inmoonbluerobes,asilvercrescentonherhead,descendsfromaSedanchairbornebytwogiants。Anoutburstofcheering。

  JOHNHOWARDPARNELLRaisestheroyalstandard。IllustriousBloom!Successortomyfamousbrother!

  BLOOMEmbracesJohnHowardParnell。Wethankyoufromourheart,John,forthisrightroyalwelcometogreenErin,thepromisedlandofourcommonancestors。

  Thefreedomofthecityispresentedtohimembodiedinacharter。ThekeysofDublin,crossedonacrimsoncushion,aregiventohim。Heshowsallthatheiswearinggreensocks。

  TOMKERNANYoudeserveit,yourhonour。

  BLOOMOnthisdaytwentyyearsagoweovercamethehereditaryenemyatLadysmith。Ourhowitzersandcamelswivelgunsplayedonhislineswithtellingeffect。Halfaleagueonward!Theycharge!Allislostnow!Doweyield?No!Wedrivethemheadlong!Lo!Wecharge!DeployingtotheleftourlighthorsesweptacrosstheheightsofPlevnaand,utteringtheirwarcry,BonafideSabaoth,sabredtheSaracengunnerstoaman。

  THECHAPELOFFREEMANTYPESETTERSHear!Hear!

  JOHNWYSENOLANThere’sthemanthatgotawayJamesStephens。

  ABLUECOATSCHOOLBOYBravo!

  ANOLDRESIDENTYou’reacredittoyourcountry,sir,that’swhatyouare。

  ANAPPLEWOMANHe’samanlikeIrelandwants。

  BLOOMMybelovedsubjects,aneweraisabouttodawn。I,Bloom,tellyouverilyitisevennowathand。Yea,onthewordofaBloom,yeshallerelongenterintothegoldencitywhichistobe,thenewBloomusalemintheNovaHiberniaofthefuture。

  Thirtytwoworkmenwearingrosettes,fromallthecountiesofIreland,undertheguidanceofDerwanthebuilderconstructthenewBloomusalem。Itisacolossaledifice,withcrystalroofbuiltintheshapeofahugeporkkidney,containingfortythousandrooms。Inthecourseofitsextensionseveralbuildingsandmonumentsaredemolished。Governmentofficesaretemporarilytransferredtorailwaysheds。Numeroushousesarerazedtotheground。Theinhabitantsarelodgedinbarrelsandboxes,allmarkedinredwiththeletters:L。B。Severalpaupersfallfromaladder。ApartofthewallsofDublin,crowdedwithloyalsightseers,collapses。

  THESIGHTSEERSDyingMorituritesalutant。Theydie。

  Amaninabrownmacintoshspringsupthroughatrap-door。HepointsanelongatedfingeratBloom。

  THEMANINTHEMACINTOSHDon’tyoubelieveawordheSays。ThatmanisLeopoldM’Intosh,thenotoriousfireraiser。HisrealnameisHiggins。

  BLOOMShoothim!Dogofachristian!SomuchforM’Intosh!

  Acannonshot。Themaninthemacintoshdisappears。Bloomwithhissceptrestrikesdownpoppies。Theinstantaneousdeathsofmanypowerfulenemies,graziers,membersofparliament,membersofstandingcommittees,arereported。Bloom’sbodyguarddistributeMaundymoney,commemorationmedals,loavesandfishes,temperancebadges,expensiveHenryClaycigars,freecowbonesforsoup,rubberpreservatives,insealedenvelopestiedwithgoldthread,butterscotch,pineapplerock,billetsdouxintheformofcockedhats,readymadesuits,porringersoftoadinthehole,bottlesofJeyes’Fluid,purchasestamps,40days’indulgences,spuriouscoins,dairyfedporksausages,theatrepasses,seasonticketsavailableforalltramlines,couponsoftheroyalandprivilegedHungarianlottery,pennydinnercounters,cheapreprintsoftheWorld’sTwelveWorstBooks:FroggyandFritzpolitic,CareoftheBabyinfantilic,SoMealsfor7/6culinic,WasJesusaSunMyth?historic,ExpelthatPainmedic,Infant’sCompendiumoftheUniversecosmic,Let’sAllChortlehilaric,Canvasser’sVadeMecumjournalic,love-lettersofMotherAssistanterotic,Who’sWhoinSpaceastric,SongsthatReachedOurHeartmelodic,Pennywise’sWaytoWealthparsimonic。Ageneralrushandscramble。WomenpressforwardtotouchthehemofBloom’srobe。TheladyGwendolenDubedatburststhroughthethrong,leapsonhishorseandkisseshimonbothcheeksamidgreatacclamation。Amagnesiumflashlightphotographistaken。Babesandsucklingsareheldup。

  THEWOMENLittlefather!Littlefather!

  THEBABESANDSUCKLINGS

  ClapclaphandstillPoldycomeshome,

  CakesinhispocketforLeoalone。

  Bloom,bendingdown,pokesBabyBoardmangentlyinthestomach。

  BABYBOARDMANHiccups,curdledmilkflowingfromhismouth。Hajajaja。

  BLOOMShakinghandswithablindstripling。MymorethanBrother!Placinghisarmsroundtheshouldersofanoldcouple。Dearoldfriends!Heplayspussyfourcornerswithraggedboysandgirls。Peep!Bopeep!Hewheelstwinsinaperambulator。Ticktacktwowouldyousetashoe?Heperformsjuggler’stricks,drawsred,orange,yellow,green,blue,indigoandvioletsilkhandkerchiefsfromhismouth。Roygbiv。32feetpersecond。Heconsolesawidow。Absencemakestheheartgrowyounger。HedancestheHighlandflingwithgrotesqueantics。Legit,yedevils!Hekissesthebedsoresofapalsiedveteran。Honourablewounds!Hetripsupafatpoliceman。U。p。:up。U。p。:up。Hewhispersintheearofablushingwaitressandlaughskindly。Ah,naughty,naughty!HeeatsarawturnipofferedhimbyMauriceButterly,farmer。Fine!Splendid!HerefusestoacceptthreeshillingsofferedhimbyJosephHynes,journalist。Mydearfellow,notatall!Hegiveshiscoattoabeggar。Pleaseaccept。Hetakespartinastomachracewithelderlymaleandfemalecripples。Comeon,boys!Wriggleit,girls!

  THECITIZENChokedwithemotion,brushesasideatearinhisemeraldmuffler。MaythegoodGodblesshim!

  Therams’hornssoundforsilence。ThestandardofZionishoisted。

  BLOOMUncloaksimpressively,revealingobesity,unrollsapaperandreadssolemnly。AlephBethGhimelDalethHagadahTephilimKosherYomKippurHanukahRoschaschanaBeniBrithBarMitzvahMazzothAskenazimMeshuggahTalith。

  AnofficialtranslationisreadbyJimmyHenry,assistanttownclerk。

  JIMMYHENRYTheCourtofConscienceisnowopen。HisMostCatholicMajestywillnowadministeropenairjustice。Freemedicalandlegaladvice,solutionofdoublesandotherproblems。Allcordiallyinvited。GivenatthisourloyalcityofDublinintheyearIoftheParadisiacalEra。

  PADDYLEONARDWhatamItodoaboutmyratesandtaxes?

  BLOOMPaythem,myfriend。

  PADDYLEONARDThankyou。

  NOSEYFLYNNCanIraiseamortgageonmyfireinsurance?

  BLOOMObdurately。Sirs,takenoticethatbythelawoftortsyouareboundoverinyourownrecognisancesforsixmonthsinthesumoffivepounds。

  J。J。O’MOLLYADanieldidIsay?Nay!APeterO’Brien!

  NOSEYFLYNNWheredoIdrawthefivepounds?

  PISSERBURKEForbladdertrouble?

  BLOOM

  Acid。nit。hydrochlordil。,20minims,

  Tinct。mix。vom。,4minims。

  Extr。taraxel。lig。,30minims。

  Aq。dis。terindie。

  CHRISCALLINANWhatistheparallaxofthesubsolareclipticofAldebaran?

  BLOOMPleasedtohearfromyou,Chris。K。II。

  JOEHYNESWhyaren’tyouinuniform?

  BLOOMWhenmyprogenitorofsaintedmemoryworetheuniformoftheAustriandespotinadankprisonwherewasyours?

  BENDOLLARDPansies?

  BLOOMEmbellishbeautifysuburbangardens。

  BENDOLLARDWhentwinsarrive?

  BLOOMFatherpater,dadstartsthinking。

  LARRYO’ROURKEAneightdaylicenceformynewpremises。Yourememberme,sirLeo,whenyouwereinnumberseven。I’msendingaroundadozenofstoutforthemissus。

  BLOOMColdly。Youhavetheadvantageofme。LadyBloomacceptsnopresents。

  CROFTONThisisindeedafestivity。

  BLOOMSolemnly。Youcallitafestivity。Icallitasacrament。

  ALEXANDERKEYESWhenwillwehaveourownhouseofkeys?

  BLOOMIstandforthereformofmunicipalmoralsandtheplaintencommandments。Newworldsforold。Unionofall,jew,moslemandgentile。Threeacresandacowforallchildrenofnature。Saloonmotorhearses。Compulsorymanuallabourforall。Allparksopentothepublicdayandnight。Electricdishscrubbers。Tuberculosis,lunacy,warandmendicancymustnowcease。Generalamnesty,weeklycarnival,withmaskedlicence,bonusesforall,esperantotheuniversalbrotherhood。Nomorepatriotismofbarspongersanddropsicalimpostors。Freemoney,freeloveandafreelaychurchinafreelaystate。

  O’MADDENBURKEFreefoxinafreehenroost。

  DAVYBYRNEYawning。Iiiiiiiiiaaaaaaach!

  BLOOMMixedracesandmixedmarriage。

  LENEHANWhataboutmixedbathing?

  Bloomexplainstothosenearhimhisschemesforsocialregeneration。Allagreewithhim。ThekeeperoftheKildareStreetMuseumappears,draggingalorryonwhicharetheshakingstatuesofseveralnakedgoddesses,VenusCallipyge,VenusPandemosVenusMetempsychosis,andplasterfigures,alsonaked,representingthenewninemuses,Commerce,OperaticMusic,AmorPublicity,Manufacture,libertyofSpeech,PluralVoting,Gastronomy,PrivateHygiene,SeasideConcertEntertainments,PainlessObstetricsandAstronomyforthePeople。

  FATHERFARLEYHeisanepiscopalian,anagnostic,ananythingarianseekingtooverthrowourholyfaith。

  MRSRIORDANTearsupherwill。I’mdisappointedinyou!Youbadman!

  MOTHERGROGANRemovesherboottothrowitatBloom。Youbeast!Youabominableperson!

  NOSEYFLYNNGiveusatune,Bloom。Oneoftheoldsweetsongs。

  BLOOMWithrollickinghumour。

  IvowedthatIneverwouldleaveher,

  Sheturnedoutacrueldeceiver。

  Withmytooraloomtooraloomtooralcomtooraloom。

  HOPPYHOLOHANGoodoldBloom!There’snobodylikehimafterall。

  PADDYLEONARDStageIrishman!

  BLOOMWhatrailwayoperaislikeatramlineinGibraltar?TheRowsofCasteele。Laughter。

  LENEHANPlagiarist!DownwithBloom!

  THEVEILEDSIBYLEnthusiastically。I’maBloomiteandIgloryinit。Ibelieveinhiminspiteofall。I’dgivemylifeforhim,thefunniestmanonearth。

  BLOOMWinksatthebystanders。Ibetshe’sabonnylassie。

  THEODOREPUREFOYInfishingcapandoilskinjacket。Heemploysamechanicaldevicetofrustratethesacredendsofnature。

  THEVEILEDSIBYLStabsherself。Myherogod!Shedies。

  Manymostattractiveandenthusiasticwomenalsocommitsuicidebystabbing,drowning,drinkingprussicacid,aconite,arsenic,openingtheirveins,refusingfood,castingthemselvesundersteamrollers,fromthetopofNelson’sPillar,intothegreatvatofGuinness’sbrewery,asphyxiatingthemselvesbyplacingtheirheadsingasovens,hangingthemselvesinstylishgarters,leapingfromwindowsofdifferentstoreys。

  ALEXANDERJ。DOWIEViolently。FellowchristiansandantiBloomites,themancalledBloomisfromtherootsofhell,adisgracetochristianmen。AfiendishlibertinefromhisearliestyearsthisstinkinggoatofMendesgaveprecocioussignsofinfantiledebaucheryrecallingthecitiesoftheplain,withadissolutegranddam。Thisvilehypocrite,bronzedwithinfamy,isthewhitebullmentionedintheApocalypse。AworshipperoftheScarletWoman,intrigueistheverybreathofhisnostrils。Thestakefaggotsandthecaldronofboilingoilareforhim。Caliban!

  THEMOBLynchhim!Roasthim!He’sasbadasParnellwas。MrFox!

  MotherGroganthrowsherbootatBloom。SeveralshopkeepersfromupperandlowerDorsetstreetthrowobjectsoflittleornocommercialvalue,hambones,condensedmilktins,unsaleablecabbage,stalebread,sheeps’tails,oddpiecesoffat。

  BLOOMExcitedly。Thisismidsummermadness,someghastlyjokeagain。Byheaven,Iamguiltlessastheunsunnedsnow!ItwasmybrotherHenry。Heismydouble。Helivesinnumber2Dolphin’sBarn。Slander,theviper,haswrongfullyaccusedme。Fellowcountrymen,sgenlinnbanbatacoisdegancapall。Icallonmyoldfriend,DrMalachiMulligan,sexspecialisttogivemedicaltestimonyonmybehalf。

  DRMULLIGANInmotorjerkin,greenmotorogglesonhisbrow。DrBloomisbisexuallyabnormal。HehasrecentlyescapedfromDrEustace’sprivateasylumfordementedgentlemen。Bornoutofbedlockhereditaryepilepsyispresent,theconsequenceofunbridledlust。Tracesofelephantiasishavebeendiscoveredamonghisascendants。Therearemarkedsymptomsofchronicexhibitionism。Ambidexterityisalsolatent。Heisprematurelybaldfromselfabuse,perverselyidealisticinconsequence,areformedrake,andhasmetalteeth。InconsequenceofafamilycomplexhehastemporarilylosthismemoryandIbelievehimtobemoresinnedagainstthansinning。Ihavemadeapervaginalexaminationand,afterapplicationoftheacidtestto5427anal,axillary,pectoralandpubichairs,Ideclarehimtobevirgointacta。

  Bloomholdshishighgradehatoverhisgenitalorgans。

  DRMADDENHypsospadiaisalsomarked。IntheinterestofcominggenerationsIsuggestthatthepartsaffectedshouldbepreservedinspiritsofwineinthenationalteratologicalmuseum。

  DRCROTTHERSIhaveexaminedthepatient’surine。Itisalbuminoid。Salivationisinsufficient,thepatellarreflexintermittent。

  DRPUNCHCOSTELLOThefetorjudaicusismostperceptible。

  DRDIXONReadsabillofhealth。ProfessorBloomisafinishedexampleofthenewwomanlyman。Hismoralnatureissimpleandlovable。Manyhavefoundhimadearman,adearperson。Heisaratherquaintfellowonthewhole,coythoughnotfeeble-mindedinthemedicalsense。Hehaswrittenareallybeautifulletter,apoeminitself,tothecourtmissionaryoftheReformedPriests’ProtectionSocietywhichclearsupeverything。HeispracticallyatotalabstainerandIcanaffirmthathesleepsonastrawlitterandeatsthemostSpartanfood,colddriedgrocer’speas。HewearsahairshirtwinterandsummerandscourgeshimselfeverySaturday。Hewas,Iunderstand,atonetimeafirstclassmisdemeanantinGlencreereformatory。Anotherreportstatesthathewasaveryposthumouschild。Iappealforclemencyinthenameofthemostsacredwordourvocalorganshaveeverbeencalledupontospeak。Heisabouttohaveababy。

  Generalcommotionandcompassion。Womenfaint。AwealthyAmericanmakesastreetcollectionforBloom。Goldandsilvercoins,bankcheques,banknotes,jewels,treasurybonds,maturingbillsofexchange,I。O。U。s,weddingrings’watch-chains,lockets,necklacesandbraceletsarerapidlycollected。

  BLOOMO,Isowanttobeamother。

  MRSTHORNTONInnursetender’sgown。Embracemetight,dear。You’llbesoonoverit。Tight,dear。

  Bloomembraceshertightlyandbearseightmaleyellowandwhitechildren。Theyappearonaredcarpetedstaircaseadornedwithexpensiveplants。Allarehandsome,withvaluablemetallicfaces,wellmade,respectablydressedandwellconducted,speakingfivemodernlanguagesfluentlyandinterestedinvariousartsandsciences。Eachhashisnameprintedinlegiblelettersonhisshirtfront:Nasodoro,Goldfinger,Chrysostomos,Maindorée,Silversmile,SilberselberVifargent,Panargros。Theyareimmediatelyappointedtopositionsofhighpublictrustinseveraldifferentcountriesasmanagingdirectorsofbanks,trafficmanagersofrailways,chairmenoflimitedliabilitycompanies,vicechairmenofhotelsyndicates。

  AVOICEBloom,areyoutheMessiahbenJosephorbenDavid?

  BLOOMDarkly。Youhavesaidit。

  BROTHERBUZZThenperformamiracle。

  BANTAMLYONSProphesywhowillwintheSaintLeger。

  Bloomwalksonanet,covershislefteyewithhisleftear,passesthroughseveralwalls,climbsNelson’sPillar,hangsfromthetheledgebyhiseyelids,eatstwelvedozenoystersshellsincluded,healsseveralsufferersfromkingsevil,contractshisfacesoastoresemblemanyhistoricalpersonages,lordBeaconsfield,lordByron,WatTyler,MosesofEgypt,MosesMaimonides,MosesMendelssohn,HenryIrving,RipvanWinkle,Rossuth,JeanJacquesRousseau,BaronLeopoldRothschild,RobinsonCrusoe,SherlockHolmes,Pasteur,turnseachfootsimultaneouslyindifferentdirections,bidsthetideturnback,eclipsesthesunbyextendinghislittlefinger。

  BRINI,PAPALNUNCIOInpapalzouave’suniform,steelcuirassesasbreastplate,armplates,thighplates,legplates,largeprofanemoustachesandbrownpapermitre。Leopoldiautemgeneratio。MosesbegatNoahandNoahbegatEunuchandEunuchbegatO’HalloranandO’HalloranbegatGuggenheimandGuggenheimbegatAgendathandAgendathbegatNetaimandNetaimbegatLeHirschandLeHirschbegatJesurumandJesurumbegatMacKayandMacKaybegatOstrolopskyandOstrolopskybegatSmerdozandSmerdozbegatWeissandWeissbegatSchwarzandSchwarzbegatAdrianopoliandAdrianopolibeganAranjuezandAranjuezbegatLewyLawsonandLewyLawsonbegatIchabudonosorandIchabudonosorbegatO’DonnellMagnusandO’DonnellMagnusbegatChristbaumandChristbaumbegatBenMaimunandBenMaimunbegatDustyRhodesandDustyRhodesbegatBenamorandBenamorbegatJones-SmithandJones-SmithbegatSavorgnanovichandSavorgnanovichbegatJasperstoneandJasperstonebegatVingtetuniemeandVingtetuniemebegatSzombathelyandSzombathelybegatViragandViragbegatBloometvocabiturnomeneiusEmmanuel。

  ADEADHANDWritesonthewall。Bloomisacod。ACRABInbushranger’skit。WhatdidyoudointhecattlecreepbehindKilbarrack?

  AFEMALEINFANTShakesarattle。AndunderBallyboughbridge?

  AHOLLYBUSHAndinthedevil’sglen?

  BLOOMBlushesfuriouslyalloverfromfronttonates,threetearsfallingfromhislefteye。Sparemypast。

  THEIRISHEVICTEDTENANTSInbodycoats,kneebreeches,withDonnybrookfairshillelaghs。Sjambokhim!

  Bloomwithasses’earsseatshimselfinthepillorywithcrossedarms,hisfeetprotruding。HewhistlesDonGiovanni,acenarteco。Artaneorphans,joininghands,caperroundhim。GirlsofthePrisonGateMission,joininghands,caperroundintheoppositedirection。

  THEARTANEORPHANS

  Youbig,youbog,youdirtydog!

  Youthinktheladiesloveyou!

  THEPRISONGATEGIRLS

  Ifyouseekay

  Tellhimhemay

  Seeyouintea

  Tellhimfromme。

  HORNBLOWERInephodandhuntingcap,announces。AndheshallcarrythesinsofthepeopletoAzazel,thespiritwhichisinthewilderness,andtoLilith,thenighthag。Andtheyshallstonehimanddefilehim,yea,allfromAgendathNetaimandfromMizraim,thelandofHam。

  AllthepeoplecastsoftpantomimestonesatBloom。Manybonafidetravellersandownerlessdogscomenearhimanddefilehim。MastianskyandCitronapproachingaberdines,wearinglongearlocks。TheywagtheirbeardsatBloom。

  MASTIANSKYANDCITRONBelial!LaemleinofIstria!thefalseMessiah!Abulafia!

  GeorgeS。Mesias,Bloom’stailor,appears,atailor’sgooseunderhisarm,presentingabill。

  MESIASToalterationonepairtrouserselevenshillings。

  BLOOMRubshishandscheerfully。Justlikeoldtimes。PoorBloom!

  ReubenJ。Dodd,blackbeardedIscariot,badshepherd,bearingonhisshouldersthedrownedcorpseofhisson,approachesthepillory。

  REUBENJ。Whispershoarsely。Thesqueakisout。Asplitisgonefortheflatties。Nipthefirstrattler。

  THEFIREBRIGADEPflaap!

  BROTHERBUZZInvestsBloominayellowhabitwithembroideryofpaintedflamesandhighpointedhat。Heplacesabagofgunpowderroundhisneckandhandshimovertothecivilpower,saying。Forgivehimhistrespasses。

  LieutenantMyersoftheDublinFireBrigadebygeneralrequestsetsfiretoBloom。Lamentations。

  THECITIZENThankheaven!

  BLOOMInaseamlessgarmentmarkedI。H。S。standsuprightamidphoenixflames。Weepnotforme,OdaughtersofErin。

  HeexhibitstoDublinreporterstracesofburning。ThedaughtersofErin,inblackgarmentswithlaceprayerbooksandlonglightedcandlesintheirhands,kneeldownandpray。

  THEDAUGHTERSOFERINKidneyofBloom,prayforus。FloweroftheBath,prayforus。MentorofMenton,prayforus。CanvasserfortheFreeman,prayforus。CharitableMason,prayforus。WanderingSoap,prayforus。SweetsofSin,prayforus。MusicwithoutWords,prayforus。ReproveroftheCitizen,prayforus。FriendofallFrillies,prayforus。MidwifeMostMerciful,prayforus。PotatoPreservativeagainstPlagueandPestilence,prayforus。

  Achoirofsixhundredvoices,conductedbyMrVincentO’Brien,singstheAlleluiachorus,accompaniedontheorganbyJosephGlynn。Bloombecomesmute,shrunken,carbonised。

  ZOETalkawaytillyou’reblackintheface。

  BLOOMIncaubeenwithclaypipestuckintheband,dustybrogues,anemigrant’sredhandkerchiefbundleinhishand,leadingablackbogoakpigbyasugaun,withasmileinhiseye。Letmebegoingnow,womanofthehouse,forbyallthegoatsinConnemaraI’mafterhavingthefatherandmotherofabating。Withatearinhiseye。Allinsanity。Patriotism,sorrowforthedead,music,futureoftherace。Tobeornottobe。Life’sdreamiso’er。Enditpeacefully。Theycanliveon。Hegazesfarawaymournfully。Iamruined。Afewpastillesofaconite。Theblindsdrawn。Aletter。Thenliebacktorest。Hebreathessoftly。Nomore。Ihavelived。Fare。Farewell。

  ZOEStiffly,herfingerinherneckfillet。Honest?Tillthenexttime。Shesneers。Supposeyougotupthewrongsideofthebedorcametooquickwithyourbestgirl。O,Icanreadyourthoughts。

  BLOOMBitterly。Manandwoman,love,whatisit?Acorkandbottle。

  ZOEInsuddensulks。Ihatearotterthat’sinsincere。Giveableedingwhoreachance。

  BLOOMRepentantly。Iamverydisagreeable。Youareanecessaryevil。Whereareyoufrom?London?

  ZOEGlibly。Hog’sNortonwherethepigsplaytheorgans。I’mYorkshireborn。Sheholdshishandwhichisfeelingforhernipple。Isay,TommyTittlemouse。Stopthatandbeginworse。Haveyoucashforashorttime?Tenshillings?

  BLOOMSmiles,nodsslowly。More,houri,more。

  ZOEAndmore’smother?Shepatshimoffhandedlywithvelvetpaws。Areyoucomingintothemusicroomtoseeournewpianola?ComeandI’llpeeloff。

  BLOOMFeelinghisocciputdubiouslywiththeunparalleledembarrassmentofaharassedpedlargaugingthesymmetryofherpeeledpears。Somebodywouldbedreadfullyjealousifsheknew。Thegreeneyedmonster。Earnestly。Youknowhowdifficultitis。Ineedn’ttellyou。

  ZOEFlattered。Whattheeyecan’tseetheheartcan’tgrievefor。Shepatshim。Come。

  BLOOMLaughingwitch!Thehandthatrocksthecradle。

  ZOEBabby!

  BLOOMInbabylinenandpelisse,bigheaded,withacaulofdarkhair,fixesbigeyesonherfluidslipandcountsitsbronzebuckleswithachubbyfinger,hismoisttonguetollingandlisping。Onetwotlee:tleetlwotlone。

  THEBUCKLESLoveme。Lovemenot。Loveme。

  ZOESilentmeansconsent。Withlittlepartedtalonsshecaptureshishand,herforefingergivingtohispalmthepasstouchofsecretmonitor,luringhimtodoom。Hothandscoldgizzard。

  Hehesitatesamidscents,music,temptations。Sheleadshimtowardsthesteps,drawinghimbytheodourofherarmpits,theviceofherpaintedeyes,therustleofherslipinwhosesinuousfoldslurksthelionreekofallthemalebrutesthathavepossessedher。

  THEMALEBRUTESExhalingsulphurofrutanddungandrampingintheirloosebox,faintlyroaring,theirdruggedheadsswayingtoandfro。Good!

  ZoeandBloomreachthedoorwaywheretwosisterwhoresareseated。Theyexaminehimcuriouslyfromundertheirpencilledbrowsandsmiletohishastybow。Hetripsawkwardly。

  ZOEHerluckyhandinstantlysavinghim。Hoopsa!Don’tfallupstairs。

  BLOOMThejustmanfallsseventimes。Hestandsasideatthethreshold。Afteryouisgoodmanners。

  ZOELadiesfirst,gentlemenafter。

  Shecrossesthethreshold。Hehesitates。Sheturnsand,holdingoutherhands,drawshimover。Hehops。Ontheantieredrackofthehallhangaman’shatandwaterproofBloomuncovershimselfbut,seeingthem,frowns,thensmiles,preoccupied。Adooronthereturnlandingisthrownopen。Amaninpurpleshirtandgreytrousers,brownsocked,passeswithanapesgait,hisbaldheadandgoateebeardupheld,huggingafullwaterjugjarhistwotailedblackbracesdanglingatheels。AvertinghisfacequicklyBloombendstoexamineonthehalltablethespanieleyesofarunningfox:then,hisliftedheadsniffing,followsZoeintothemusicroom。Ashadeofmauvetissuepaperdimsthelightofthechandelier。Roundandroundamothflies,colliding,escaping。Theflooriscoveredwithanoilclothmosaicofjadeandazureandcinnabarrhomboids。Footmarksarestampedoveritinallsenses,heeltoheel,heeltohollow,toetotoe,feetlocked,amorrisofshufflingfeetwithoutbodyphantoms,allinascrimmagehiggledypiggledy。Thewallsaretapes-triedwithapaperofyewfrondsandclearglades。Inthegrateisspreadascreenofpeacockfeathers。Lynchsquatscrossleggedonthehearthrugofmattedhair,hiscapbacktothefront。Withawandhebeatstimeslowly。KittyRicketts,abonypallidwhoreinnavycostume,doeskinglovesrolledbackfromacoralwristlet,achainpurseinherhand,sitsperchedontheedgeofthetableswingingherlegandglancingatherselfinthegiltmirroroverthemantelpiece。Atagofhercorsetlacehangsslightlybelowherjacket。Lynchindicatesmockinglythecoupleatthepiano。

  KITTYCoughsbehindherhand。She’sabitimbecilic。Shesignswithawagglingforefinger。Blemblem。Lynchliftsupherskirtandwhitepetticoatwiththewand。Shesettlesthemdownquickly。Respectyourself。Shehiccups,thenbendsquicklyhersailorhatunderwhichherhairglows,redwithhenna。O,excuse!

  ZOEMorelimelight,Charley。Shegoestothechandelierandturnsthegasfullcock。

  KITTYPeersatthegasjet。Whatailsittonight?

  LYNCHDeeply。Enteraghostandhobgoblins。

  ZOEClaponthebackforZoe。

  ThewandinLynch’shandflashes:abrasspoker。Stephenstandsatthepianolaonwhichsprawlhishatandashplant。Withtwofingersherepeatsoncemoretheseriesofemptyfifths。FlorryTalbot,ablondfeeblegoosefatwhoreinatatterdemaliongownofmildewedstrawberry,lollsspreadeagleinthesofacorner,herlimpforearmpendentoverthebolster,listening。Aheavystyedroopsoverhersleepyeyelid。

  KITTYHiccupsagainwithakickofherhorsedfoot。O,excuse!

  ZOEPromptly。Yourboy’sthinkingofyou。Tieaknotonyourshift。

  KittyRickettsbendsherhead。Herboauncoils,slides,glidesoverhershoulder,back,arm,chairtotheground。Lynchliftsthecurledcaterpillaronhiswand。Shesnakesherneck,nestling。Stephenglancesbehindatthesquattedfigurewithitscapbacktothefront。

  STEPHENAsamatteroffactitisofnoimportancewhetherBenedettoMarcellofounditormadeit。Theriteisthepoet’srest。ItmaybeanoldhymntoDemeteroralsoillustrateClaenarrantgloriamDomini。ItissusceptibleofnodesormodesasfarapartashyperphrygianandmixolydianandoftextssodivergentaspriestshaihoopingroundDavid’sthatisCirce’sorwhatamIsayingCeres’altarandDavid’stipfromthestabletohischiefbassoonistabouthisalmightiness。Mais,nomdenom,thatisanotherpairoftrousers。Jetezlagourme。Fautquejeunessesepasse。Hestops,pointsatLynch’scap,smiles,laughs。Whichsideisyourknowledgebump?

  THECAPWithsaturninespleen。Bah!Itisbecauseitis。Woman’sreason。Jewgreekisgreekjew。Extremesmeet。Deathisthehighestformoflife。Bah!

  STEPHENYourememberfairlyaccuratelyallmyerrors,boasts,mistakes。HowlongshallIcontinuetoclosemyeyestodisloyalty?Whetstone!

  THECAPBah!

  STEPHENHere’sanotherforyou。Hefrowns。Thereasonisbecausethefundamentalandthedominantareseparatedbythegreatestpossibleintervalwhich。

  THECAPWhich?Finish。Youcan’t。

  STEPHENWithoneffort。Intervalwhich。Isthegreatestpossibleellipse。Consistentwith。Theultimatereturn。Theoctave。Which。

  THECAPWhich?OutsidethegramophonebeginstoblareTheHolyCity。

  STEPHENAbruptly。Whatwentforthtotheendsoftheworldtotraversenotitself。God,thesun,Shakespeare,acommercialtraveller,havingitselftraversedinrealityitself,becomesthatself。Waitamoment。Waitasecond。Damnthatfellow’snoiseinthestreet。Selfwhichititselfwasineluctablypreconditionedtobecome。Ecco!

  LYNCHWithamockingwhinnyoflaughtergrinsatBloomandZoeHiggins。Whatalearnedspeech,eh?

  ZOEBriskly。Godhelpyourhead,heknowsmorethanyouhaveforgotten。

  WithobesestupidityFlorryTalbotregardsStephen。

  FLORRYTheysaythelastdayiscomingthissummer。

  KITTYNo!

  ZOEExplodesinlaughter。GreatunjustGod!

  FLORRYOffended。Well,itwasinthepapersaboutAntichrist。O,myfoot’stickling。

  Raggedbarefootnewsboys,joggingawagtailkite,patterpast,yelling。

  THENEWSBOYSStoppressedition。Resultoftherockinghorseraces。Seaserpentintheroyalcanal。SafearrivalofAntichrist。

  StephenturnsandseesBloom。

  STEPHENAtime,timesandhalfatime。

  ReubenJ。Antichrist,wanderingjew,aclutchinghandopenonhisspine,stumpsforward。Acrosshisloinsisslungapilgrimswalletfromwhichprotrudepromissorynotesanddishonouredbills。Aloftoverhisshoulderhebearsalongboatpolefromthehookofwhichthesoddenhuddledmassofhisonlyson,savedfromLiffeywaters,hangsfromtheslackofitsbreeches。AhobgoblinintheimageofPunchCostello,hipshot,crookbacked,hydrocephalic,prognathicwithrecedingforeheadandAllySlopernose,tumblesinsomersaultsthroughthegatheringdarkness。

  ALLWhat?

  THEHOBGOBLINHisjawschattering,caperstoandfro,gogglinghiseyes,squeaking,kangaroohopping,withoutstretchedclutchingarms,thenallatoncethrustshisliplessfacethroughtheforkofhisthighs。Ilvient!C’estmoi!L’hommequirit!L’hommeprimigene!Hewhirlsroundandroundwithdervishhowls。Sieursetdames,faitesvosjeux!Hecrouchesjuggling。Tinyrouletteplanetsflyfromhishands。Lesjeuxson!faits!Theplanetsrushtogether,utteringcrepitantcracks。Rienn’vaplus。Theplanets,buoyantballoons,sailswollenupandaway。Hespringsoffintovacuum。

  FLORRYSinkingintotorpor,crossesherselfsecretly。Theendoftheworld!

  Afemaletepideffluviumleaksoutfromher。Nebulousobscurityoccupiesspace。Throughthedriftingfogwithoutthegramophoneblaresovercoughsandfeetshuffling。

  THEGRAMOPHONEJerusalem!OpenyourgatesandsingHosanna……

  Arocketrushesuptheskyandbursts。Awhitestarfallsfromit,proclaimingtheconsummationofallthingsandsecondcomingofElijah。Alonganinfiniteinvisibletight-ropetautfromzenithtonadirtheEndoftheWorld,atwoheadedoctopusingillieskilts,busbyandtartanfilibegs,whirlsthroughthemurk,headoverheels,inthefoboftheThreeLugsofMan。

  THEENDOFTHEWORLDWithaScotchaccent。Wha’lldancethekeelrow,thekeelrow,thekeelrow?

  Overthepassingdriftandchokingbreathcoughs,Elijah’svoice,harshasacorncrakes,jarsonhigh。Perspiringinalooselawnsurplicewithfunnelsleevesheisseen,vergefacedabovearostrumaboutwhichthebannerofoldgloryisdraped。Hethumpstheparapet。

  ELIJAHNoyapping,ifyouplease,inthisbooth。JakeCrane,CreoleSue,DaveCampbell,AbeKirschner,doyourcoughingwithyourmouthsshut。Say,Iamoperatingallthistrunkline。Boys,doitnow。God’stimeis12。25。Tellmotheryou’llbethere。Rushyourorderandyouplayaslickace。Joinonrighthere!Bookthroughtoeternityjunction,thenonstoprun。Justonewordmore。Areyouagodoradoggoneclod?IfthesecondadventcametoConeyIslandareweready?FlorryChrist,StephenChrist,ZoeChrist,BloomChrist,KittyChrist,LynchChrist,it’suptoyoutosensethatcosmicforce。Havewecoldfeetaboutthecosmos?No。Beonthesideoftheangels。Beaprism。Youhavethatsomethingwithin,thehigherself。YoucanrubshoulderswithaJesus,aGautama,anIngersoll。Areyouallinthisvibration?Isayyouare。Youoncenobblethat,congregation,andabuckjoyridetoheavenbecomesabacknumber。Yougotme?It’salifebrightener,sure。Thehotteststuffeverwas。It’sthewholepiewithjamin。It’sjustthecutestsnappiestlineout。Itisimmense,supersumptuous。Itrestores。Itvibrates。IknowandIamsomevibrator。Jokingapartandgettingdowntobedrock,A。J。ChristDowieandtheharmonialphilosophy,haveyougotthat?O。K。Seventysevenwestsixtyninthstreet。Gotme?That’sit。Youcallmeupbysunphoneanyoldtime。Bumboosers,saveyourstamps。Heshouts。Nowthenourglorysong。Alljoinheartilyinthesinging。Encore!Hesings。Jeru……

  THEGRAMOPHONEDrowninghisvoice。Whorusalaminyourhighhohhhh。

  Thediscraspsgratinglyagainsttheneedle。

  THETHREE’WHORESCoveringtheirears,squawk。Ahhkkk!

  ELIJAHInrolledupshirtsleeves,blackintheface,shoutsatthetopofhisvoice,hisarmsuplifted。BigBrotherupthere,MrPresident,youhearwhatIdonejustbeensayingtoyou。Certainly,Isortofbelievestronginyou,MrPresident。IcertainlyamthinkingnowMissHigginsandMissRickettsgotreligionwayinsidethem。CertainlyseemstomeIdon’tneverseenowusserscaredfemalethanthewayyoubeen,MissFlorry,justnowasIdoneseedyou。MrPresident,youcomelongandhelpmesaveoursistersdear。Hewinksathisaudience。OurMrPresident,hetwigthewholelotandheain’tsayingnothing。

  KITTY-KATEIforgotmyself。InaweakmomentIerredanddidwhatIdidonConstitutionhill。Iwasconfirmedbythebishop。Mymother’ssistermarriedaMontmorency。ItwasaworkingplumberwasmyruinationwhenIwaspure。

  ZOE-FANNYIlethimlarrupitintomeforthefunofit。

  FLORRY-TERESAItwasinconsequenceofaportwinebeverageontopofHennessy’sthreestarsIwasguiltywithWhelanwhenheslippedintothebed。

  STEPHENInthebeginningwastheword,intheendtheworldwithoutend。Blessedbetheeightbeatitudes。

  Thebeatitudes,Dixon,Madden,Crotthers,Costello,Lenehan,Bannon,MulliganandLynchinwhitesurgicalstudents’gowns,fourabreast,goosestepping,trampfastpastinnoisymarching。

  THEBEATITUDESIncoherently。Beerbeefbattledogbuybullbusinumbarnumbuggerumbishop。

  LYSTERInquakergreykneebreechesandbroadbrimmedhat,saysdiscreetly。Heisourfriend。Ineednotmentionnames。Seekthouthelight。

  Hecorantosby。Bestentersinhairdresserattire,shinilylaundered,hislocksincurlpapers。HeleadsJohnEglintonwhowearsamandarin’skimonoofNankeenyellow,lizard-lettered,andahighpagodahat。

  BESTSmiling,liftsthehatanddisplaysashavenpollfromthecrownofwhichbristlesapigtailtoupeetiedwithanorangetopknot。Iwasjustbeautifyinghim,don’tyouknow。Athingofbeauty,don’tyouknow。Yeatssays,orImean,Keatssays。Producesagreencappeddarklanternandflashesittowardsacorner;withcarpingaccent。Estheticsandcosmeticsarefortheboudoir。Iamoutfortruth。Plaintruthforaplainman。Tanderageewantsthefactsandmeanstogetthem。

  Intheconeofthesearchlightbehindthecoalscuttle,ollave,holyeyed,thebeardedfigureofMananaanMacLirbroods,chinonknees。Herisesslowly。Acoldseawindblowsfromhisdruidmantle。Abouthisheadwritheeelsandelvers。Heisencrustedwithweedsandshells。Hisrighthandholdsabicyclepump。Hislefthandgraspsahugecrayfishbyitstwotalons。

点击下载App,搜索"Ulysses(尤利西斯)",免费读到尾