Shelookedlongatherfaceinthemirror，studyingwithafearfulinterestthelittlehardlinesandmarkingstherebeneaththeirlightcoatingofpowder。Sheexaminedthecunningtouchesofcolouringmatterhereandthereinherfronthair。Weretheycunningenough？
Didtheydeceive？Theyseemedtohersuddenlytostareout。Shefingeredandsmoothedtheslightloosenessandfulnessoftheskinbelowherchin。Shestretchedherself，andpassedherhandsdownoverherwholeform，searchingasitwereforslackness，orthickness。Andshehadthebitterthought:’I’mallout。I’mdoingallIcan。’ThelinesofalittlepoemForthadshowedherwentthrummingthroughherhead:
\"Time，youoldgipsymanWillyounotstayPutupyourcaravanJustforaday？\"
Whatmorecouldshedo？Hedidnotliketoseeherlipsreddened。
Shehadmarkedhisdisapprovals，watchedhimwipehismouthafterakiss，whenhethoughtshecouldn’tseehim。’Ineed’nt！’shethought。’Noel’slipsarenoredder，really。WhathasshebetterthanI？Youth——dewonthegrass！’Thatdidn’tlastlong！Butlongenoughto\"doherin\"ashersoldier—menwouldsay。And，suddenlysherevoltedagainstherself，againstFort，againstthischilledandfoggycountry;feltafiercenostalgiaforAfricansun，andtheAfricanflowers;thehappy—go—lucky，hand—to—mouthexistenceofthosefiveyearsbeforethewarbegan。HighConstantiaatgrapeharvest！
Howmanyyearsago——tenyears，elevenyears！Ah！Tohavebeforeherthosetenyears，withhim！Tenyearsinthesun！Hewouldhavelovedherthen，andgoneonlovingher！Andshewouldnothavetiredofhim，asshehadtiredofthoseothers。’Inhalfanhour，’shethought，’he’llbehere，sitoppositeme;Ishallseehimstrugglingforcinghimselftoseemaffectionate！It’stoohumbling！ButI
don’tcare;Iwanthim！’
Shesearchedherwardrobe，forsomegarmentortouchofcolour，noveltyofanysort，tohelpher。Butshehadtriedthemall——thoselittletricks——wasbankrupt。Andsuchadiscouraged，heavymoodcameonher，thatshedidnoteven\"change，\"butwentbackinhernurse’sdressandlaydownonthedivan，pretendingtosleep，whilethemaidsetoutthesupper。Shelaytheremoodyandmotionless，tryingtosummoncourage，feelingthatifsheshowedherselfbeatenshewasbeaten;knowingthatsheonlyheldhimbypity。Butwhensheheardhisfootsteponthestairssheswiftlypassedherhandsoverhercheeks，asiftopressthebloodoutofthem，andlayabsolutelystill。Shehopedthatshewaswhite，andindeedshewas，withfinger—marksundertheeyes，forshehadsufferedgreatlythislasthour。Throughherlashesshesawhimhalt，andlookatherinsurprise。Asleep，or—ill，which？Shedidnotmove。Shewantedtowatchhim。Hetiptoedacrosstheroomandstoodlookingdownather。
Therewasafurrowbetweenhiseyes。’Ah！’shethought，’itwouldsuityou，ifIweredead，mykindfriend。’Hebentalittletowardsher;andshewonderedsuddenlywhethershelookedgracefullyingthere，sorrynowthatshehadnotchangedherdress。Shesawhimshrughisshoulderseversofaintlywithapuzzledlittlemovement。
Hehadnotseenthatshewasshamming。Hownicehisfacewas——notmean，secret，callous！Sheopenedhereyes，whichagainstherwillhadinthemthedespairshewasfeeling。Hewentonhisknees，andliftingherhandtohislips，hidthemwithit。
\"Jimmy，\"shesaidgently，\"I’manawfulboretoyou。PoorJimmy！
No！Don’tpretend！IknowwhatIknow！\"’Oh，God！WhatamI
saying？’shethought。’It’sfatal—fatal。Ioughtnever！’Anddrawinghisheadtoher，sheputittoherheart。Then，instinctivelyawarethatthismomenthadbeenpressedtoitsuttermost，shescrambledup，kissedhisforehead，stretchedherself，andlaughed。
\"Iwasasleep，dreaming;dreamingyoulovedme。Wasn’titfunny？
Comealong。Thereareoysters，forthelasttimethisseason。\"
Allthatevening，asifbothknewtheyhadbeenlookingoveraprecipice，theyseemedtobetreadingwarily，desperatelyanxiousnottorouseemotionineachother，ortouchonthingswhichmustbringascene。AndLeilatalkedincessantlyofAfrica。
\"Don’tyoulongforthesun，Jimmy？Couldn’twe——couldn’tyougo？
Oh！whydoesn’tthiswretchedwarend？Allthatwe’vegothereathomeeveryscrapofwealth，andcomfort，andage，andart，andmusic，I’dgiveitallforthelightandthesunoutthere。Wouldn’tyou？\"
AndFortsaidhewould，knowingwellofonethingwhichhewouldnotgive。Andsheknewthat，aswellashe。
Theywerebothgayerthantheyhadbeenforalongtime;sothatwhenhehadgone，shefellbackoncemoreontothedivan，andburyingherfaceinacushion，weptbitterly。
V
1
ItwasnotquitedisillusionmentthatPiersonfeltwhilehewalkedaway。PerhapshehadnotreallybelievedinLeila’sregeneration。
Itwasmoreanacutediscomfort，anincreasingloneliness。Asoftandrestfulspotwasnowdeniedhim;acertainwarmthandallurementhadgoneoutofhislife。HehadnoteventhefeelingthatitwashisdutytotryandsaveLeilabypersuadinghertomarryFort。Hehadalwaysbeentoosensitive，toomuchasitwereofagentleman，fortherobustersortsofevangelism。Suchdelicacyhadbeenastumbling—blocktohimallthroughprofessionallife。Intheeightyearswhenhiswifewaswithhim，allhadbeenmorecertain，moredirectandsimple，withthehelpofhersympathy，judgment;andcompanionship。Atherdeathasortofmisthadgatheredinhissoul。
Noonehadeverspokenplainlytohim。Toaclergyman，whodoes？Noonehadtoldhiminsomanywordsthatheshouldhavemarriedagain——
thattostayunmarriedwasbadforhim，physicallyandspiritually，foggingandpervertinglife;notdrivinghim，indeed，asitdrovemany，tointoleranceandcruelty，buttothathalf—livingdreaminess，andthevagueunhappyyearningswhichsoconstantlybesethim。Allthesecelibateyearshehadreallyonlybeenhappyinhismusic，orinfar—awaycountryplaces，takingstrongexercise，andlosinghimselfinthebeautiesofNature;andsincethewarbeganhehadonlyonce，forthosethreedaysatKestrel，beenoutofLondon。
Hewalkedhome，goingoverinhismindveryanxiouslyalltheevidencehehadofFort’sfeelingforNoel。Howmanytimeshadhebeentothemsinceshecameback？Onlythreetimes——threeeveningvisits！Andhehadnotbeenalonewithherasingleminute！Beforethiscalamitybefellhisdaughter，hewouldneverhaveobservedanythinginFort’sdemeanour;but，inhisnewwatchfulness，hehadseenthealmostreverentialwayhelookedather，noticedtheextrasoftnessofhisvoicewhenhespoketoher，andoncealookofsuddenpain，asortofdullingofhiswholeself，whenNoelhadgotupandgoneoutoftheroom。Andthegirlherself？TwicehehadsurprisedhergazingatFortwhenhewasnotlooking，withasortofbroodinginterest。Herememberedhow，asalittlegirl，shewouldwatchagrown—up，andthensuddenlyonedayattachherselftohim，andbequitedevoted。Yes，hemustwarnher，beforeshecouldpossiblybecomeentangled。Inhisfastidiouschastity，theopinionhehadheldofFortwassuddenlylowered。He，alreadyafree—thinker，wasnowrevealedasafree—liver。PoorlittleNollie！Endangeredagainalready！Everymanakindofwolfwaitingtopounceonher！
HefoundLavendieandNoelinthedrawing—room，standingbeforetheportraitwhichwasnearingcompletion。Helookedatitforalongminute，andturnedaway:
\"Don’tyouthinkit’slikeme，Daddy？\"
\"It’slikeyou;butithurtsme。Ican’ttellwhy。\"
HesawthesmileofapainterwhosepictureisbeingcriticisedcomeonLavendie’sface。
\"Itisperhapsthecolouringwhichdoesnotpleaseyou，monsieur？\"
\"No，no;deeper。Theexpression;whatisshewaitingfor？\"
ThedefensivesmilediedonLavendie’slips。
\"ItisasIseeher，monsieurlecure。\"
Piersonturnedagaintothepicture，andsuddenlycoveredhiseyes。
\"Shelooks’fey，\"’hesaid，andwentoutoftheroom。
LavendieandNoelremainedstaringatthepicture。\"Fey？Whatdoesthatmean，mademoiselle？\"
\"Possessed，orsomething。\"
Andtheycontinuedtostareatthepicture，tillLavendiesaid:
\"Ithinkthereisstillalittletoomuchlightonthatear。\"
Thesameevening，atbedtime，PiersoncalledNoelback。
\"Nollie，Iwantyoutoknowsomething。Inallbutthename，CaptainFortisamarriedman。\"
Hesawherflush，andfelthisownfacedarkeningwithcolour。
Shesaidcalmly:\"Iknow;toLeila。\"
\"Doyoumeanshehastoldyou？\"
Noelshookherhead。
\"Thenhow？\"
\"Iguessed。Daddy，don’ttreatmeasachildanymore。What’stheuse，now？\"
Hesatdowninthechairbeforethehearth，andcoveredhisfacewithhishands。Bythequiveringofthosehands，andthemovementofhisshoulders，shecouldtellthathewasstiflingemotion，perhapsevencrying;andsinkingdownonhiskneesshepressedhishandsandfacetoher，murmuring:\"Oh，Daddydear！Oh，Daddydear！\"
Heputhisarmsroundher，andtheysatalongtimewiththeircheekspressedtogether，notspeakingaword。
VI
1
Thedayafterthatsilentoutburstofemotioninthedrawing—roomwasaSunday。And，obeyingthelongingawakenedovernighttobeasgoodasshecouldtoherfather;Noelsaidtohim:
\"WouldyoulikemetocometoChurch？\"
\"Ofcourse，Nollie。\"
Howcouldhehaveansweredotherwise？TohimChurchwasthehomeofcomfortandabsolution，wherepeoplemustbringtheirsinsandtroubles——ahavenofsinners，thefountofcharity，offorgiveness，andlove。Nottohavebelievedthat，afteralltheseyears，wouldhavebeentodenyallhisusefulnessinlife，andtocastaslurontheHouseofGod。
AndsoNoelwalkedtherewithhim，forGratianhadgonedowntoGeorge，fortheweek—end。Sheslippedquietlyupthesideaisletotheiremptypew，underthepulpit。Neverturninghereyesfromthechancel，sheremainedunconsciousofthestirherpresencemade，duringthathourandtwentyminutes。Behindher，thedumbcurrentsofwonder，disapproval，andresentmentranastealthycourse。Onheralleyeswerefixedsoonerorlater，andeverymindbecametheplaygroundofjudgments。Fromeverysoul，kneeling，standing，orsitting，whilethevoiceoftheServicedroned，sang，orspoke，akindofglareradiatedontothatonesmalldevotedhead，whichseemedsoludicrouslydevout。Shedisturbedtheirdevotions，thisgirlwhohadbetrayedherfather，herfaith，herclass。Sheoughttorepent，ofcourse，andChurchwastherightplace;yettherewassomethingbrazeninherrepentingtherebeforetheirveryeyes;shewastoopalpableaflawinthecrystaloftheChurch’sauthority，toovisiblearentintheraimentoftheirpriest。Herfigurefocusedalltheuneasyamazementandheartsearchingsoftheselastweeks。
Mothersquiveredwiththeknowledgethattheirdaughterscouldseeher;wiveswiththeideathattheirhusbandswereseeingher。Menexperiencedsensationsvaryingfromcondemnationtoasortofcovetousness。Youngfolkwondered，andfeltinclinedtogiggle。Oldmaidscouldhardlybeartolook。Hereandthereamanorwomanwhohadseenlifefacetoface，wassimplysorry！Theconsciousnessofallwhoknewherpersonallywasatstretchhowtobehaveiftheycamewithinreachofheringoingout。For，thoughonlyhalfadozenwouldactuallyrubshoulderswithher，allknewthattheymightbe，andmanyfeltittheirdutytobe，ofthathalf—dozen，soastoestablishtheirattitudeonceforall。Itwas，infact，toosevereatestforhumannatureandthefeelingswhichChurchoughttoarouse。
Thestillnessofthatyoungfigure，theimpossibilityofseeingherfaceandjudgingofherstateofmindthereby;finally，afaintlurkingshamethattheyshouldbesointriguedanddisturbedbysomethingwhichhadtodowithsex，inthisHouseofWorship——allcombinedtoproduceineverymindthatherd—feelingofdefence，whichsosoonbecomes，offensive。And，halfunconscious，halfawareofitall，Noelstood，andsat，andknelt。Onceortwiceshesawherfather’seyesfixedonher;and，stillintheglowoflastnight’spityandremorse，feltakindofworshipforhisthingraveface。
Butforthemostpart，herownworetheexpressionLavendiehadtranslatedtohiscanvas——thelookofoneeverwaitingfortheextrememomentsoflife，forthosefewandfleetingpoignancieswhichexistenceholdsforthehumanheart。Alookneitherhungrynordissatisfied，butdreamyandexpectant，whichmightblazeintowarmthanddepthatanymoment，andthengobacktoitsdream。
Whenthelastnotesoftheorgandiedawayshecontinuedtositverystill，withoutlookinground。
TherewasnosecondService，andthecongregationmeltedoutbehindher，andhaddispersedintothestreetsandsquareslongbeforeshecameforth。Afterhesitatingwhetherornotogotothevestrydoor，sheturnedawayandwalkedhomealone。
Itwasthisdeliberateevasionofallcontactwhichprobablyclinchedthebusiness。Theabsenceofvent，ofanyescape—pipeforthefeelings，isalwaysdangerous。Theyfeltcheated。IfNoelhadcomeoutamongstallthosewhosedevotionsherpresencehaddisturbed，ifinthatexit，somehadshownandothershadwitnessedoneknowsnotwhatofamanifestedostracism，theoutragedsenseofsocialdecencymighthavebeenappeasedandsleepingdogsallowedtolie，forwesoongetusedtothings;and，afterall，thewartookprecedenceineverymindevenoversocialdecency。Butnoneofthishadoccurred，andasensethatSundayafterSundaythesamelittleoutragewouldhappentothem，movedmorethanadozenquiteunrelatedpersons，andcausedthepostingthateveningofasmanyletters，signedandunsigned，toacertainquarter。Londonisnoplaceforparishconspiracy，andasituationwhichinthecountrywouldhaveprovokedmeetingsmoreorlesspublic，andpossiblyaresolution，couldperhapsonlythusbedealtwith。Besides，incertainfolkthereiseveramysteriousitchtowriteanunsignedletter——suchmissivessatisfysomeobscuresenseofjustice，someuncontrollablelongingtogetevenwiththosewhohavehurtordisturbedthem，withoutaffordingtheoffenderschanceforfurtherhurtordisturbance。
Letterswhicharepostedoftenreachtheirdestination。
OnWednesdaymorningPiersonwassittinginhisstudyatthehourdevotedtothecallsofhisparishioners，whenthemaidannounced，\"CanonRushbourne，sir，\"andhesawbeforehimanoldCollegefriendwhomhehadmetbutseldominrecentyears。Hisvisitorwasashort，grey—hairedmanofratherportlyfigure，whoseround，rosy，good—
humouredfacehadalookofsobergoodness，andwhoselight—blueeyesshonealittle。HegraspedPierson’shand，andsaidinavoicetowhosenaturalheavyresonanceprofessionaldutyhadaddedacertainunction:
\"MydearEdward，howmanyyearsitissincewemet！DoyourememberdearoldBlakeway？Isawhimonlyyesterday。He’sjustthesame。
I’mdelightedtoseeyouagain，\"andhelaughedalittlesoftnervouslaugh。ThenforafewmomentshetalkedofthewarandoldCollegedays，andPiersonlookedathimandthought:’Whathashecomefor？’
\"You’vesomethingtosaytome，Alec，\"hesaid，atlast。
CanonRushbourneleanedforwardinhischair，andansweredwithevidenteffort:\"Yes;Iwantedtohavealittletalkwithyou，Edward。Ihopeyouwon’tmind。Idohopeyouwon’t。\"
\"WhyshouldImind？\"
CanonRushbourne’seyesshonemorethanever，therewasrealfriendlinessinhisface。
\"Iknowyou’veeveryrighttosaytome:’Mindyourownbusiness。’
ButImadeupmymindtocomeasafriend，hopingtosaveyoufrom——er\"hestammered，andbeganagain:\"Ithinkyououghttoknowofthefeelinginyourparishthat——er——that——er——yourpositionisverydelicate。WithoutbreachofconfidenceImaytellyouthatlettershavebeensenttoheadquarters;youcanimagineperhapswhatImean。
Dobelieve，mydearfriend，thatI’mactuatedbymyoldaffectionforyou;nothingelse，Idoassureyou。\"
Inthesilence，hisbreathingcouldbeheard，asofamanalittletouchedwithasthma，whilehecontinuallysmoothedhisthickblackknees，hiswholefaceradiatingananxiouskindliness。Thesunshonebrightlyonthosetwoblackfigures，soverydifferent，anddrewoutoftheirwell—worngarmentsthefaintlatentgreenmossinesswhich。
underliestheclothesofclergymen。
AtlastPiersonsaid:\"Thankyou，Alec;Iunderstand。\"
TheCanonutteredaresoundingsigh。\"Youdidn’trealisehowveryeasilypeoplemisinterpretherbeingherewithyou;itseemstothemakind——akindofchallenge。Theywerebound，Ithink，tofeelthat;
andI’mafraid，inconsequence——\"Hestopped，movedbythefactthatPiersonhadclosedhiseyes。
\"Iamtochoose，youmean，betweenmydaughterandmyparish？\"
TheCanonseemed，withastammerofwords，totryandblunttheedgeofthatclearquestion。
\"Myvisitisquiteinformal，mydearfellow;Ican’tsayatall。Butthereisevidentlymuchfeeling;thatiswhatIwantedyoutoknow。
Youhaven’tquiteseen，Ithink，that——\"
Piersonraisedhishand。\"Ican’ttalkofthis。\"
TheCanonrose。\"Believeme，Edward，Isympathisedeeply。IfeltI
hadtowarnyou。\"Heheldouthishand。\"Good—bye，mydearfriend，doforgiveme\";andhewentout。Inthehallanadventurebefellhimsoplump，andawkward，thathecouldbarelyreciteittoMrs。
Rushbournethatnight。
\"Comingoutfrommypoorfriend，\"hesaid，\"Iranintoababy’sperambulatorandthatyoungmother，whomIrememberasalittlething\"——heheldhishandatthelevelofhisthigh——\"arrangingitforgoingout。Itstartledme;andIfearIaskedquitefoolishly:’Isitaboy？’Thepooryoungthinglookedupatme。Shehasverylargeeyes，quitebeautiful，strangeeyes。’HaveyoubeenspeakingtoDaddyaboutme？’’Mydearyounglady，’Isaid，’I’msuchanoldfriend，yousee。Youmustforgiveme。’Andthenshesaid:’Aretheygoingtoaskhimtoresign？’’Thatdependsonyou，’Isaid。WhydoIsaythesethings，Charlotte？Ioughtsimplytohaveheldmytongue。Pooryoungthing;soveryyoung！Andthelittlebaby！\"
\"Shehasbroughtitonherself，Alec，\"Mrs，Rushbournereplied。
VII
1
Themomenthisvisitorhadvanished，Piersonpacedupanddownthestudy，withangerrisinginhis，heart。Hisdaughterorhisparish！
Theoldsaw，\"AnEnglishman’shouseishiscastle！\"wasbeingattackedwithinhim。Musthenotthenharbourhisowndaughter，andhelpherbycandidatonementtoregainherinwardstrengthandpeace？
WashenottherebyactingasatrueChristian，inbyfarthehardestcourseheandshecouldpursue？Togobackonthatdecisionandimperilhisdaughter’sspirit，orelseresignhisparish——thealternativeswerebrutal！Thiswasthecentreofhisworld，theonlyspotwheresolonelyamancouldhopetofeeleventhesemblanceofhome;athousandlittlethreadstetheredhimtohischurch，hisparishioners，andthishouse——for，toliveonhereifhegaveuphischurchwasoutofthequestion。Buthischieffeelingwasabewilderedangerthatfordoingwhatseemedtohimhisduty，heshouldbeattackedbyhisparishioners。
Apassionofdesiretoknowwhattheyreallythoughtandfelt——theseparishionersofhis，whomhehadbefriended，andforwhomhehadworkedsolong——besethimnow，andhewentout。ButtheabsurdityofhisqueststruckhimbeforehehadgonethelengthoftheSquare。
Onecouldnotgotopeopleandsay:\"Standanddelivermeyourinmostjudgments。\"Andsuddenlyhewasawareofhowfarawayhereallywasfromthem。Throughallhisministrationshadheevercometoknowtheirhearts？Andnow，inthisdirenecessityforknowledge，thereseemednowayofgettingit。Hewentatrandomintoastationer’sshop;theshopmansangbassinhischoir。TheyhadmetSundayafterSundayforthelastsevenyears。Butwhen，withthisitchforintimateknowledgeonhim，hesawthemanbehindthecounter，itwasasifhewerelookingonhimforthefirsttime。TheRussianproverb，\"Theheartofanotherisadarkforest，\"gashedintohismind，whilehesaid:
\"Well，Hodson，whatnewsofyourson？\"
\"Nothingmore，Mr。Pierson，thankyou，sir，nothingmoreatpresent。\"
AnditseemedtoPierson，gazingattheman’sfaceclothedinashort，grizzlingbeardcutratherlikehisown，thathemustbethinking:’Ah！sir，butwhatnewsofyourdaughter？’Noonewouldevertellhimtohisfacewhathewasthinking。Andbuyingtwopencils，hewentout。Ontheothersideoftheroadwasabird—
fancier’sshop，keptbyawomanwhosehusbandhadbeentakenfortheArmy。Shewasnotfriendlytowardshim，foritwasknowntoherthathehadexpostulatedwithherhusbandforkeepinglarks，andotherwildbirds。Andquitedeliberatelyhecrossedtheroad，andstoodlookinginatthewindow，withthemorbidhopethatfromthisunfriendlyonehemightheartruth。Shewasinhershop，andcametothedoor。
\"Haveyouanynewsofyourhusband，Mrs。Cherry？\"
\"No，Mr。Pierson，I’avenot;notthisweek。\"
\"Hehasn’tgoneoutyet？\"
\"No，Mr。Pierson;’e’asnot。\"
Therewasnoexpressiononherface，perfectlyblankitwas——Piersonhadamadlongingtosay’ForGod’ssake，woman，speakoutwhat’sinyourmind;tellmewhatyouthinkofmeandmydaughter。Nevermindmycloth！’Buthecouldnomoresayitthanthewomancouldtellhimwhatwasinhermind。Andwitha\"Goodmorning\"hepassedon。Nomanorwomanwouldtellhimanything，unless，perhaps，theyweredrunk。Hecametoapublichouse，andforamomentevenhesitatedbeforeit，butthethoughtofinsultaimedatNoelstoppedhim，andhepassedthattoo。Andthenrealitymadeitselfknowntohim。
Thoughhehadcomeouttohearwhattheywerethinking，hedidnotreallywanttohearit，couldnotendureitifhedid。Hehadbeentoolongimmunefromcriticism，toolonginthepositionofonewhomaytellotherswhathethinksofthem。Andstandingthereinthecrowdedstreet，hewasattackedbythatlongingforthecountrywhichhadalwayscomeonhimwhenhewashardpressed。Helookedathismemoranda。Bystupendousluckitwasalmostablankday。Anomnibuspassedclosebywhichwouldtakehimfarout。Heclimbedontoit，andtravelledasfarasHendon;thengettingdown，setforthonfoot。
Itwasbrightandhot，andtheMayblossominfullfoam。HewalkedfastalongtheperfectlystraightroadtillhecametothetopofElstreeHill。Thereforafewmomentshestoodgazingattheschoolchapel，thecricket—field，thewidelandbeyond。Allwasveryquiet，foritwaslunch—time。Ahorsewastetheredthere，andastrollingcat，asthoughstruckbythetallblackincongruityofhisfigure，pausedinherprogress，then，slitheringunderthewicketgate，archedherbackandrubbedherselfagainsthisleg，crinklingandwavingthetipofhertail。Piersonbentdownandstrokedthecreature’shead;bututteringafaintmiaou，thecatsteppeddaintilyacrosstheroad，Piersontoosteppedon，pastthevillage，anddownoverthestile，intoafieldpath。Attheedgeoftheyoungclover，underabankofhawthorn，helaydownonhisback，withhishatbesidehimandhisarmscrossedoverhischest，liketheeffigyofsomecrusaderonemayseecarvedonanoldtomb。Thoughhelayquietasthatoldknight，hiseyeswerenotclosed，butfixedontheblue，wherealarkwassinging。Itssongrefreshedhisspirit;itspassionatelight—heartednessstirredalltheloveofbeautyinhim，awokerevoltagainstaworldsomurderousanduncharitable。Oh！topassupwiththatsongintoalandofbrightspirits，wherewasnothingugly，hard，merciless，andthegentlefaceoftheSaviourradiatedeverlastinglove！Thescentofthemayflowers，bornedownbythesunshine，drenchedhissenses;heclosedhiseyes，and，atonce，asifresentingthatmomentaryescape，hismindresumeddebatewithstartlingintensity。Thismatterwenttotheverywell—springs，hadaterribleandsecretsignificance。Iftoactasconsciencebadehimrenderedhimunfittokeephisparish，allwasbuiltonsand，hadnodeepreality，wasbutrootedinconvention。Charity，andtheforgivenessofsinshonestlyatonedfor——whatbecameofthem？
Eitherhewaswrongtohaveespousedstraightforwardconfessionandatonementforher，ortheywerewronginchasinghimfromthatespousal。Therecouldbenomakingthoseextremestomeet。Butifhewerewrong，havingdonethehardestthingalready——wherecouldheturn？HisChurchstoodbankruptofideals。Hefeltasifpushedovertheedgeoftheworld，withfeetonspace，andheadinsomeblindingcloud。’Icannothavebeenwrong，’hethought;’anyothercoursewassomucheasier。Isacrificedmypride，andmypoorgirl’spride;Iwouldhavelovedtoletherrunaway。Ifforthiswearetobestonedandcastforth，whatlivingforceisthereinthereligionIhaveloved;whatdoesitallcometo？HaveIservedasham？I
cannotandwillnotbelieveit。Somethingiswrongwithme，somethingiswrong——butwhere——what？’Herolledover，layonhisface，andprayed。Heprayedforguidanceanddeliverancefromthegustsofangerwhichkeptsweepingoverhim;evenmoreforrelieffromthefeelingofpersonaloutrage，andtheunfairnessofthisthing。Hehadstriventobeloyaltowhathethoughttheright，hadsacrificedallhissensitiveness，allhissecretfastidiousprideinhischildandhimself。Forthathewastobethrownout！Whetherthroughprayer，orinthescentandfeeloftheclover，hefoundpresentlyacertainrest。AwayinthedistancehecouldseethespireofHarrowChurch。
TheChurch！No！Shewasnot，couldnotbe，atfault。Thefaultwasinhimself。’Iamunpractical，’hethought。’Itisso，Iknow。
Agnesusedtosayso，BobandThirzathinkso。Theyallthinkmeunpracticalanddreamy。Isitasin——Iwonder？’Therewerelambsinthenextfield;hewatchedtheirgambollingsandhisheartrelaxed;
brushingthecloverdustoffhisblackclothes，hebegantoretracehissteps。Theboyswereplayingcricketnow，andhestoodafewminuteswatchingthem。Hehadnotseencricketplayedsincethewarbegan;itseemedalmostotherworldly，withtheclickofthebats，andtheshrillyoung’voices，underthedistantdroneofthatsky—hornetthreshingalongtoHendon。Aboymadeagoodleghit。\"Wellplayed！\"hecalled。Then，suddenlyconsciousofhisownincongruityandstrangenessinthatgreenspot，heturnedawayontheroadbacktoLondon。Toresign;toawaitevents;tosendNoelaway——ofthosethreecourses，thelastaloneseemedimpossible。’AmIreallysofarfromthem，’hethought，’thattheycanwishmetogo，forthis？Ifso，Ihadbettergo。Itwillbejustanotherfailure。ButIwon’tbelieveityet;Ican’tbelieveit。’
Theheatwassweltering，andhebecameverytiredbeforeatlasthereachedhisomnibus，andcouldsitwiththebreezecoolinghishotface。Hedidnotreachhometillsix，havingeatennothingsincebreakfast。Intendingtohaveabathandliedowntilldinner，hewentupstairs。