ButcheredtomakeaRomanholidaysoundswellforthefirstseventeenoreighteenhundredthousandtimesoneseesitinprint，butafterthatitbeginstogrowtiresome。IfinditinallthebooksconcerningRome——andherelatterlyitremindsmeofJudgeOliver。Oliverwasayounglawyer，freshfromtheschools，whohadgoneouttothedesertsofNevadatobeginlife。Hefoundthatcountry，andourwaysoflife，there，inthoseearlydays，differentfromlifeinNewEnglandorParis。Butheputonawoollenshirtandstrappedanavyrevolvertohisperson，tooktothebaconandbeansofthecountry，anddeterminedtodoinNevadaasNevadadid。Oliveracceptedthesituationsocompletelythatalthoughhemusthavesorrowedovermanyofhistrials，henevercomplained——thatis，henevercomplainedbutonce。He，twoothers，andmyself，startedtothenewsilverminesintheHumboldtmountains——hetobeProbateJudgeofHumboldtcounty，andwetomine。Thedistancewastwohundredmiles。Itwasdeadofwinter。
Weboughtatwo—horsewagonandputeighteenhundredpoundsofbacon，flour，beans，blasting—powder，picksandshovelsinit;weboughttwosorry—lookingMexican\"plugs，\"withthehairturnedthewrongwayandmorecornersontheirbodiesthanthereareonthemosqueofOmar;wehitchedupandstarted。
Itwasadreadfultrip。ButOliverdidnotcomplain。Thehorsesdraggedthewagontwomilesfromtownandthengaveout。Thenwethreepushedthewagonsevenmiles，andOlivermovedaheadandpulledthehorsesafterhimbythebits。Wecomplained，butOliverdidnot。Thegroundwasfrozen，anditfrozeourbackswhileweslept;thewindsweptacrossourfacesandfrozeournoses。Oliverdidnotcomplain。Fivedaysofpushingthewagonbydayandfreezingbynightbroughtustothebadpartofthejourney——theFortyMileDesert，ortheGreatAmericanDesert，ifyouplease。Still，thismildest—manneredmanthateverwas，hadnotcomplained。Westartedacrossateightinthemorning，pushingthroughsandthathadnobottom;
toilingalldaylongbythewrecksofathousandwagons，theskeletonsoftenthousandoxen;bywagon—tiresenoughtohooptheWashingtonMonumenttothetop，andox—chainsenoughtogirdleLongIsland;byhumangraves;
withourthroatsparchedalways，withthirst;lipsbleedingfromthealkalidust;hungry，perspiring，andvery，veryweary——sowearythatwhenwedroppedinthesandeveryfiftyyardstorestthehorses，wecouldhardlykeepfromgoingtosleep——nocomplaintsfromOliver:nonethenextmorningatthreeo\'clock，whenwegotacross，tiredtodeath。
Awakenedtwoorthreenightsafterwardatmidnight，inanarrowcanon，bythesnowfallingonourfaces，andappalledattheimminentdangerofbeing\"snowedin，\"weharnessedupandpushedontilleightinthemorning，passedthe\"Divide\"andknewweweresaved。Nocomplaints。Fifteendaysofhardshipandfatiguebroughtustotheendofthetwohundredmiles，andtheJudgehadnotcomplained。Wewonderedifanythingcouldexasperatehim。WebuiltaHumboldthouse。Itisdoneinthisway。Youdigasquareinthesteepbaseofthemountain，andsetuptwouprightsandtopthemwithtwojoists。Thenyoustretchagreatsheetof\"cottondomestic\"fromthepointwherethejoistsjointhehill—sidedownoverthejoiststotheground;thismakestheroofandthefrontofthemansion;thesidesandbackarethedirtwallsyourdigginghasleft。Achimneyiseasilymadebyturninguponecorneroftheroof。Oliverwassittingaloneinthisdismalden，onenight，byasage—brushfire，writingpoetry;hewasveryfondofdiggingpoetryoutofhimself——orblastingitoutwhenitcamehard。Heheardananimal\'sfootstepsclosetotheroof;astoneortwoandsomedirtcamethroughandfellbyhim。Hegrewuneasyandsaid\"Hi！
——clearoutfromthere，can\'tyou！\"——fromtimetotime。Butbyandbyhefellasleepwherehesat，andprettysoonamulefelldownthechimney！
Thefireflewineverydirection，andOliverwentoverbackwards。Abouttennightsafterthat，herecoveredconfidenceenoughtogotowritingpoetryagain。Againhedozedofftosleep，andagainamulefelldownthechimney。Thistime，abouthalfofthatsideofthehousecameinwiththemule。Strugglingtogetup，themulekickedthecandleoutandsmashedmostofthekitchenfurniture，andraisedconsiderabledust。TheseviolentawakeningsmusthavebeenannoyingtoOliver，buthenevercomplained。
Hemovedtoamansionontheoppositesideofthecanon，becausehehadnoticedthemulesdidnotgothere。Onenightabouteighto\'clockhewasendeavoringtofinishhispoem，whenastonerolledin——thenahoofappearedbelowthecanvas——thenpartofacow——theafterpart。Heleanedbackindread，andshouted\"Hooy！hooy！getoutofthis！\"andthecowstruggledmanfully——lostgroundsteadily——dirtandduststreameddown，andbeforeOlivercouldgetwellaway，theentirecowcrashedthroughontothetableandmadeashapelesswreckofeverything！
Then，forthefirsttimeinhislife，Ithink，Olivercomplained。Hesaid，\"Thisthingisgrowingmonotonous！\"
ThenheresignedhisjudgeshipandleftHumboldtcounty。\"ButcheredtomakeaRomanholiday\"hasgrownmonotonoustome。
InthisconnectionIwishtosayonewordaboutMichaelAngeloBuonarotti。
IusedtoworshipthemightygeniusofMichaelAngelo——thatmanwhowasgreatinpoetry，painting，sculpture，architecture——greatineverythingheundertook。ButIdonotwantMichaelAngeloforbreakfast——forluncheon——fordinner——fortea——forsupper——forbetweenmeals。Ilikeachange，occasionally。InGenoa，hedesignedeverything;inMilanheorhispupilsdesignedeverything;hedesignedtheLakeofComo;inPadua，Verona，Venice，Bologna，whodidweeverhearof，fromguides，butMichaelAngelo？InFlorence，hepaintedeverything，designedeverything，nearly，andwhathedidnotdesignheusedtositonafavoritestoneandlookat，andtheyshowedusthestone。InPisahedesignedeverythingbuttheoldshot—tower，andtheywouldhaveat—tributedthattohimifithadnotbeensoawfullyoutoftheperpendicular。HedesignedthepiersofLeghornandthecustomhouseregulationsofCivitaVecchia。But，here——hereitisfrightful。
HedesignedSt。Peter\'s;hedesignedthePope;hedesignedthePantheon，theuniformofthePope\'ssoldiers，theTiber，theVatican，theColiseum，theCapitol，theTarpeianRock，theBarberiniPalace，St。JohnLateran，theCampagna，theAppianWay，theSevenHills，theBathsofCaracalla，theClaudianAqueduct，theCloacaMaxima——theeternalboredesignedtheEternalCity，andunlessallmenandbooksdolie，hepaintedeverythinginit！Dansaidtheotherdaytotheguide，\"Enough，enough，enough！Saynomore！Lumpthewholething！saythattheCreatormadeItalyfromdesignsbyMichaelAngelo！\"
Ineverfeltsoferventlythankful，sosoothed，sotranquil，sofilledwithablessedpeace，asIdidyesterdaywhenIlearnedthatMichaelAngelowasdead。
Butwehavetakenitoutofthisguide。HehasmarchedusthroughmilesofpicturesandsculptureinthevastcorridorsoftheVatican;andthroughmilesofpicturesandsculptureintwentyotherpalaces;hehasshownusthegreatpictureintheSistineChapel，andfrescoesenoughtofrescoetheheavens——prettymuchalldonebyMichaelAngelo。Sowithhimwehaveplayedthatgamewhichhasvanquishedsomanyguidesforus——imbecilityandidioticquestions。Thesecreaturesneversuspect——theyhavenoideaofasarcasm。
Heshowsusafigureandsays:\"Statoobrunzo。\"（Bronzestatue。）
Welookatitindifferentlyandthedoctorasks:\"ByMichaelAngelo？\"
\"No——notknowwho。\"
ThenheshowsustheancientRomanForum。Thedoctorasks:\"MichaelAngelo？\"
Astarefromtheguide。\"No——thousan\'yearbeforeheisborn。\"
ThenanEgyptianobelisk。Again:\"MichaelAngelo？\"
\"Oh，mondieu，genteelmen！Zisistwothousan\'yearbeforeheisborn！\"
Hegrowssotiredofthatunceasingquestionsometimes，thathedreadstoshowusanythingatall。ThewretchhastriedallthewayshecanthinkoftomakeuscomprehendthatMichaelAngeloisonlyresponsibleforthecreationofapartoftheworld，butsomehowhehasnotsucceededyet。
Reliefforovertaskedeyesandbrainfromstudyandsightseeingisnecessary，orweshallbecomeidioticsureenough。Thereforethisguidemustcontinuetosuffer。Ifhedoesnotenjoyit，somuchtheworseforhim。Wedo。
InthisplaceImayaswelljotdownachapterconcerningthosenecessarynuisances，Europeanguides。Manyamanhaswishedinhishearthecoulddowithouthisguide;butknowinghecouldnot，haswishedhecouldgetsomeamusementoutofhimasaremunerationfortheafflictionofhissociety。
Weaccomplishedthislattermatter，andifourexperiencecanbemadeusefultootherstheyarewelcometoit。
GuidesknowaboutenoughEnglishtotangleeverythingupsothatamancanmakeneitherheadortailofit。Theyknowtheirstorybyheart——thehistoryofeverystatue，painting，cathedralorotherwondertheyshowyou。Theyknowitandtellitasaparrotwould——andifyouinterrupt，andthrowthemoffthetrack，theyhavetogobackandbeginoveragain。
Alltheirliveslong，theyareemployedinshowingstrangethingstoforeignersandlisteningtotheirburstsofadmiration。Itishumannaturetotakedelightinexcitingadmiration。Itiswhatpromptschildrentosay\"smart\"
things，anddoabsurdones，andinotherways\"showoff\"whencompanyispresent。Itiswhatmakesgossipsturnoutinrainandstormtogoandbethefirsttotellastartlingbitofnews。Think，then，whatapassionitbecomeswithaguide，whoseprivilegeitis，everyday，toshowtostrangerswondersthatthrowthemintoperfectecstasiesofadmiration！Hegetssothathecouldnotbyanypossibilityliveinasobereratmosphere。Afterwediscoveredthis，weneverwentintoecstaciesanymore——weneveradmiredanything——wenevershowedanybutimpassiblefacesandstupidindifferenceinthepresenceofthesublimestwondersaguidehadtodisplay。Wehadfoundtheirweakpoint。Wehavemadegooduseofiteversince。Wehavemadesomeofthosepeoplesavage，attimes，butwehaveneverlostourownserenity。
Thedoctorasksthequestions，generally，becausehecankeephiscountenance，andlookmorelikeaninspiredidiot，andthrowmoreimbecilityintothetoneofhisvoicethananymanthatlives。Itcomesnaturaltohim。
TheguidesinGenoaaredelightedtosecureanAmericanparty，becauseAmericanssomuchwonder，anddealsomuchinsentimentandemotionbeforeanyrelicofColumbus。Ourguidetherefidgetedaboutasifhehadswallowedaspringmattress。Hewasfullofanimation——fullofimpatience。Hesaid:
\"Comewisme，genteelmen！——come！IshowyouzeletterwritingbyChristopherColombo！——writeithimself！——writeitwishisownhand！——come！\"
Hetookustothemunicipalpalace。Aftermuchimpressivefumblingofkeysandopeningoflocks，thestainedandageddocumentwasspreadbeforeus。Theguide\'seyessparkled。Hedancedaboutusandtappedtheparchmentwithhisfinger:
\"WhatItellyou，genteelmen！Isitnotso？See！handwritingChristopherColombo！——writeithimself！\"
Welookedindifferent——unconcerned。Thedoctorexaminedthedocumentverydeliberately，duringapainfulpause。——Thenhesaid，withoutanyshowofinterest:
\"Ah——Ferguson——what——whatdidyousaywasthenameofthepartywhowrotethis？\"
\"ChristopherColombo！zegreatChristopherColombo！\"
Anotherdeliberateexamination。
\"Ah——didhewriteithimself;or——orhow？\"
\"Hewriteithimself！——ChristopherColombo！He\'sownhand—writing，writebyhimself！\"
Thenthedoctorlaidthedocumentdownandsaid:
\"Why，IhaveseenboysinAmericaonlyfourteenyearsoldthatcouldwritebetterthanthat。\"
\"ButzisiszegreatChristo——\"
\"Idon\'tcarewhoitis！It\'stheworstwritingIeversaw。Nowyoumusn\'tthinkyoucanimposeonusbecausewearestrangers。Wearenotfools，byagooddeal。Ifyouhavegotanyspecimensofpenmanshipofrealmerit，trotthemout！——andifyouhaven\'t，driveon！\"
Wedroveon。Theguidewasconsiderablyshakenup，buthemadeonemoreventure。Hehadsomethingwhichhethoughtwouldovercomeus。Hesaid:
\"Ah，genteelmen，youcomewisme！Ishowyoubeautiful，O，magnificentbustChristopherColombo！——splendid，grand，magnificent！\"
Hebroughtusbeforethebeautifulbust——foritwasbeautiful——andsprangbackandstruckanattitude:
\"Ah，look，genteelmen！——beautiful，grand，——bustChristopherColombo！
——beautifulbust，beautifulpedestal！\"
Thedoctorputuphiseye—glass——procuredforsuchoccasions:
\"Ah——whatdidyousaythisgentleman\'snamewas？\"
\"ChristopherColombo！——zegreatChristopherColombo！\"
\"ChristopherColombo——thegreatChristopherColombo。Well，whatdidhedo？\"
\"DiscoverAmerica！——discoverAmerica，Oh，zedevil！\"
\"DiscoverAmerica。No——thatstatementwillhardlywash。WearejustfromAmericaourselves。Weheardnothingaboutit。ChristopherColombo——pleasantname——is——ishedead？\"
\"Oh，corpodiBaccho！——threehundredyear！\"
\"Whatdidhedieof？\"
\"Idonotknow！——Icannottell。\"
\"Small—pox，think？\"
\"Idonotknow，genteelmen！——Idonotknowwhathedieof！\"
\"Measles，likely？\"
\"Maybe——maybe——Idonotknow——Ithinkhedieofsomethings。\"
\"Parentsliving？\"
\"Im—poseeeble！\"
\"Ah——whichisthebustandwhichisthepedestal？\"
\"SantaMaria！——ziszebust！——ziszepedestal！\"
\"Ah，Isee，Isee——happycombination——veryhappycombination，indeed。
Is——isthisthefirsttimethisgentlemanwaseveronabust？\"
Thatjokewaslostontheforeigner——guidescannotmasterthesubtletiesoftheAmericanjoke。
WehavemadeitinterestingforthisRomanguide。YesterdaywespentthreeorfourhoursintheVatican，again，thatwonderfulworldofcuriosities。
Wecameverynearexpressinginterest，sometimes——evenadmiration——
itwasveryhardtokeepfromit。Wesucceededthough。Nobodyelseeverdid，intheVaticanmuseums。Theguidewasbewildered——non—plussed。Hewalkedhislegsoff，nearly，huntingupextraordinarythings，andexhaustedallhisingenuityonus，butitwasafailure;wenevershowedanyinterestinanything。Hehadreservedwhatheconsideredtobehisgreatestwondertillthelast——aroyalEgyptianmummy，thebestpreservedintheworld，perhaps。Hetookusthere。Hefeltsosure，thistime，thatsomeofhisoldenthusiasmcamebacktohim:
\"See，genteelmen！——Mummy！Mummy！\"
Theeye—glasscameupascalmly，asdeliberatelyasever。
\"Ah，——Ferguson——whatdidIunderstandyoutosaythegentleman\'snamewas？\"
\"Name？——hegotnoname！——Mummy！——\'Gyptianmummy！\"
\"Yes，yes。Bornhere？\"
\"No！\'Gyptianmummy！\"
\"Ah，justso。Frenchman，Ipresume？\"
\"No！——notFrenchman，notRoman！——borninEgypta！\"
\"BorninEgypta。NeverheardofEgyptabefore。Foreignlocality，likely。
Mummy——mummy。Howcalmheis——howself—possessed。Is，ah——ishedead？\"
\"Oh，sacrebleu，beendeadthreethousan\'year！\"
Thedoctorturnedonhimsavagely:
\"Here，now，whatdoyoumeanbysuchconductasthis！PlayingusforChinamenbecausewearestrangersandtryingtolearn！Tryingtoimposeyourvilesecond—handcarcassesonus！——thunderandlightning，I\'veanotionto——to——ifyou\'vegotanicefreshcorpse，fetchhimout！——orbyGeorgewe\'llbrainyou！\"
WemakeitexceedinglyinterestingforthisFrenchman。However，hehaspaidusback，partly，withoutknowingit。Hecametothehotelthismorningtoaskifwewereup，andheendeavoredaswellashecouldtodescribeus，sothatthelandlordwouldknowwhichpersonshemeant。Hefinishedwiththecasualremarkthatwewerelunatics。Theobservationwassoinnocentandsohonestthatitamountedtoaverygoodthingforaguidetosay。
Thereisoneremark（alreadymentioned，）whichneveryethasfailedtodisgusttheseguides。Weuseitalways，whenwecanthinkofnothingelsetosay。Aftertheyhaveexhaustedtheirenthusiasmpointingouttousandpraisingthebeautiesofsomeancientbronzeimageorbroken—leggedstatue，welookatitstupidlyandinsilenceforfive，ten，fifteenminutes——aslongaswecanholdout，infact——andthenask:
\"Is——ishedead？\"
Thatconquerstheserenestofthem。Itisnotwhattheyarelookingfor——especiallyanewguide。OurRomanFergusonisthemostpatient，unsuspecting，long—sufferingsubjectwehavehadyet。Weshallbesorrytopartwithhim。Wehaveenjoyedhissocietyverymuch。Wetrusthehasenjoyedours，butweareharassedwithdoubts。
Wehavebeeninthecatacombs。Itwaslikegoingdownintoaverydeepcellar，onlyitwasacellarwhichhadnoendtoit。Thenarrowpassagesareroughlyhewnintherock，andoneachhandasyoupassalong，thehollowedshelvesarecarvedout，fromthreetofourteendeep;eachheldacorpseonce。Therearenames，andChristiansymbols，andprayers，orsentencesexpressiveofChristianhopes，carveduponnearlyeverysarcophagus。ThedatesbelongawaybackinthedawnoftheChristianera，ofcourse。Here，intheseholesintheground，thefirstChristianssometimesburrowedtoescapepersecution。Theycrawledoutatnighttogetfood，butremainedundercoverinthedaytime。ThepriesttoldusthatSt。Sebastianlivedundergroundforsometimewhilehewasbeinghunted;hewentoutoneday，andthesoldierydiscoveredandshothimtodeathwitharrows。FiveorsixoftheearlyPopes——thosewhoreignedaboutsixteenhundredyearsago——heldtheirpapalcourtsandadvisedwiththeirclergyinthebowelsoftheearth。Duringseventeenyears——fromA。D。235toA。D。252——
thePopesdidnotappearaboveground。Fourwereraisedtothegreatofficeduringthatperiod。Fouryearsapiece，orthereabouts。Itisverysuggestiveoftheunhealthinessofundergroundgraveyardsasplacesofresidence。
OnePopeafterwardspenthisentirepontificateinthecatacombs——eightyears。Anotherwasdiscoveredinthemandmurderedintheepiscopalchair。
TherewasnosatisfactioninbeingaPopeinthosedays。Thereweretoomanyannoyances。ThereareonehundredandsixtycatacombsunderRome，eachwithitsmazeofnarrowpassagescrossingandrecrossingeachotherandeachpassagewalledtothetopwithscoopedgravesitsentirelength。
Acarefulestimatemakesthelengthofthepassagesofallthecatacombscombinedfootupninehundredmiles，andtheirgravesnumbersevenmillions。
Wedidnotgothroughallthepassagesofallthecatacombs。Wewereveryanxioustodoit，andmadethenecessaryarrangements，butourtoolimitedtimeobligedustogiveuptheidea。SoweonlygropedthroughthedismallabyrinthofSt。Callixtus，undertheChurchofSt。Sebastian。Inthevariouscatacombsaresmallchapelsrudelyhewninthestones，andheretheearlyChristiansoftenheldtheirreligiousservicesbydim，ghostlylights。
Thinkofmassandasermonawaydowninthosetangledcavernsunderground！
InthecatacombswereburiedSt。Cecilia，St。Agnes，andseveralotherofthemostcelebratedofthesaints。InthecatacombofSt。Callixtus，St。Bridgetusedtoremainlonghoursinholycontemplation，andSt。CharlesBorromeowaswonttospendwholenightsinprayerthere。Itwasalsothesceneofaverymarvelousthing。\"HeretheheartofSt。PhilipNeriwassoinflamedwithdivineloveastobursthisribs。\"IfindthatgravestatementinabookpublishedinNewYorkin1808，andwrittenby\"Rev。WilliamH。Neligan，LL。D。，M。A。，TrinityCollege，Dublin;
MemberoftheArchaeologicalSocietyofGreatBritain。\"Therefore，Ibelieveit。Otherwise，Icouldnot。UnderothercircumstancesIshouldhavefeltacuriositytoknowwhatPhiliphadfordinner。
Thisauthorputsmycredulityonitsmettleeverynowandthen。HetellsofoneSt。JosephCalasanctiuswhosehouseinRomehevisited;hevisitedonlythehouse——thepriesthasbeendeadtwohundredyears。HesaystheVirginMaryappearedtothissaint。Thenhecontinues:\"Histongueandhisheart，whichwerefoundafternearlyacenturytobewhole，whenthebodywasdisinterredbeforehiscanonization，arestillpreservedinaglasscase，andaftertwocenturiestheheartisstillwhole。WhentheFrenchtroopscametoRome，andwhenPiusVII。
wascarriedawayprisoner，blooddroppedfromit。\"ToreadthatinabookwrittenbyamonkfarbackintheMiddleAges，wouldsurprisenoone;itwouldsoundnaturalandproper;butwhenitisseriouslystatedinthemiddleofthenineteenthcentury，byamanoffinishededucation，anLL。D。，M。A。，andanArchaeologicalmagnate，itsoundsstrangelyenough。
Still，IwouldgladlychangemyunbeliefforNeligan\'sfaith，andlethimmaketheconditionsashardashepleased。
Theoldgentleman\'sundoubting，unquestioningsimplicityhasararefreshnessaboutitinthesematter—of—factrailroadingandtelegraphingdays。Hearhim，concerningthechurchofAraCoeli:\"Intheroofofthechurch，directlyabovethehighaltar，isengraved，\'ReginaCoelilaetareAlleluia。\"InthesixthcenturyRomewasvisitedbyafearfulpestilence。GregorytheGreaturgedthepeopletodopenance，andageneralprocessionwasformed。ItwastoproceedfromAraCoelitoSt。Peter\'s。AsitpassedbeforethemoleofAdrian，nowtheCastleofSt。Angelo，thesoundofheavenlyvoiceswasheardsinging（itwasEastermorn，）ReginaCoeli，laetare！alleluia！quiaquemmeruistiportare，alleluia！resurrexitsicutdixit;alleluia！\"ThePontiff，carryinginhishandstheportraitoftheVirgin，（whichisoverthehighaltarandissaidtohavebeenpaintedbySt。Luke，）answered，withtheastonishedpeople，\'OrapronobisDeum，alleluia！\'Atthesametimeanangelwasseentoputupaswordinascabbard，andthepestilenceceasedonthesameday。Therearefourcircumstanceswhichconfirm*thismiracle:theannualprocessionwhichtakesplaceinthewesternchurchonthefeastofStMark;thestatueofSt。Michael，placedonthemoleofAdrian，whichhassincethattimebeencalledtheCastleofSt。Angelo;
theantiphonReginaCoeliwhichtheCatholicchurchsingsduringpaschaltime;andtheinscriptioninthechurch。\"*Theitalicsaremine——M。T。
Chapter28
FromthesanguinarysportsoftheHolyInquisition;theslaughteroftheColiseum;andthedismaltombsoftheCatacombs，InaturallypasstothepicturesquehorrorsoftheCapuchinConvent。WestoppedamomentinasmallchapelinthechurchtoadmireapictureofSt。MichaelvanquishingSatan——apicturewhichissobeautifulthatIcannotbutthinkitbelongstothereviled\"Renaissance，\"notwithstandingIbelievetheytoldusoneoftheancientoldmasterspaintedit——andthenwedescendedintothevastvaultunderneath。
Herewasaspectacleforsensitivenerves！Evidentlytheoldmastershadbeenatworkinthisplace。Thereweresixdivisionsintheapartment，andeachdivisionwasornamentedwithastyleofdecorationpeculiartoitself——andthesedecorationswereineveryinstanceformedofhumanbones！
Therewereshapelyarches，builtwhollyofthighbones;therewerestartlingpyramids，builtwhollyofgrinningskulls;therewerequaintarchitecturalstructuresofvariouskinds，builtofshinbonesandthebonesofthearm;
onthewallwereelaboratefrescoes，whosecurvingvinesweremadeofknottedhumanvertebræ;whosedelicatetendrilsweremadeofsinewsandtendons;
whoseflowerswereformedofknee—capsandtoe—nails。Everylastingportionofthehumanframewasrepresentedintheseintricatedesigns（theywerebyMichaelAngelo，Ithink，）andtherewasacarefulfinishaboutthework，andanattentiontodetailsthatbetrayedtheartist\'sloveofhislaborsaswellashisschooledability。Iaskedthegood—naturedmonkwhoaccompaniedus，whodidthis？Andhesaid，\"Wedidit\"——meaninghimselfandhisbrethrenupstairs。Icouldseethattheoldfriartookahighprideinhiscuriousshow。Wemadehimtalkativebyexhibitinganinterestweneverbetrayedtoguides。
\"Whowerethesepeople？\"
\"We——upstairs——MonksoftheCapuchinorder——mybrethren。\"
\"Howmanydepartedmonkswererequiredtoupholsterthesesixparlors？\"
\"Thesearethebonesoffourthousand。\"
\"Ittookalongtimetogetenough？\"
\"Many，manycenturies。\"
\"Theirdifferentpartsarewellseparated——skullsinoneroom，legsinanother，ribsinanother——therewouldbestirringtimeshereforawhileifthelasttrumpshouldblow。Someofthebrethrenmightgetholdofthewrongleg，intheconfusion，andthewrongskull，andfindthemselveslimping，andlookingthrougheyesthatwerewiderapartorclosertogetherthantheywereusedto。Youcannottellanyofthesepartiesapart，Isuppose？\"
\"Oh，yes，Iknowmanyofthem。\"
Heputhisfingeronaskull。\"ThiswasBrotherAnselmo——deadthreehundredyears——agoodman。\"
Hetouchedanother。\"ThiswasBrotherAlexander——deadtwohundredandeightyyears。ThiswasBrotherCarlo——deadaboutaslong。\"
Thenhetookaskullandhelditinhishand，andlookedreflectivelyuponit，afterthemannerofthegrave—diggerwhenhediscoursesofYorick。
\"This，\"hesaid，\"wasBrotherThomas。Hewasayoungprince，thescionofaproudhousethattraceditslineagebacktothegrandolddaysofRomewellnightwothousandyearsago。Helovedbeneathhisestate。Hisfamilypersecutedhim;persecutedthegirl，aswell。TheydroveherfromRome;hefollowed;hesoughtherfarandwide;hefoundnotraceofher。
HecamebackandofferedhisbrokenheartatouraltarandhiswearylifetotheserviceofGod。Butlookyou。Shortlyhisfatherdied，andlikewisehismother。Thegirlreturned，rejoicing。Shesoughteverywhereforhimwhoseeyeshadusedtolooktenderlyintohersoutofthispoorskull，butshecouldnotfindhim。Atlast，inthiscoarsegarbwewear，sherecognizedhiminthestreet。Heknewher。Itwastoolate。Hefellwherehestood。
Theytookhimupandbroughthimhere。Heneverspokeafterward。Withintheweekhedied。Youcanseethecolorofhishair——faded，somewhat——
bythisthinshredthatclingsstilltothetemple。\"This，\"[takingupathighbone，]\"washis。Theveinsofthisleafinthedecorationsoveryourhead，werehisfinger—joints，ahundredandfiftyyearsago。\"
Thisbusiness—likewayofillustratingatouchingstoryoftheheartbylayingtheseveralfragmentsoftheloverbeforeusandnamingthem，wasasgrotesqueaperformance，andasghastly，asanyIeverwitnessed。
Ihardlyknewwhethertosmileorshudder。Therearenervesandmusclesinourframeswhosefunctionsandwhosemethodsofworkingitseemsasortofsacrilegetodescribebycoldphysiologicalnamesandsurgicaltechnicalities，andthemonk\'stalksuggestedtomesomethingofthiskind。Fancyasurgeon，withhisnippersliftingtendons，musclesandsuchthingsintoview，outofthecomplexmachineryofacorpse，andobserving，\"Nowthislittlenervequivers——thevibrationisimpartedtothismuscle——fromhereitispassedtothisfibroussubstance;hereitsingredientsareseparatedbythechemicalactionoftheblood——onepartgoestotheheartandthrillsitwithwhatispopularlytermedemotion，anotherpartfollowsthisnervetothebrainandcommunicatesintelligenceofastartlingcharacter——thethirdpartglidesalongthispassageandtouchesthespringconnectedwiththefluidreceptaclesthatlieintherearoftheeye。Thus，bythissimpleandbeautifulprocess，thepartyisinformedthathismotherisdead，andheweeps。\"
Horrible！
Iaskedthemonkifallthebrethrenupstairsexpectedtobeputinthisplacewhentheydied。Heansweredquietly:
\"Wemustallliehereatlast。\"
Seewhatonecanaccustomhimselfto。——Thereflectionthathemustsomedaybetakenapartlikeanengineoraclock，orlikeahousewhoseownerisgone，andworkedupintoarchesandpyramidsandhideousfrescoes，didnotdistressthismonkintheleast。Ithoughtheevenlookedasifhewerethinking，withcomplacentvanity，thathisownskullwouldlookwellontopoftheheapandhisownribsaddacharmtothefrescoeswhichpossiblytheylackedatpresent。