第3章
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  Flanneryspentadayherdinghischargesthroughanarrowopeningintheircagesothathemightcountthem。

  \"AuditDept。\"hewrote,whenhehadfinishedthecount,\"youarewayofftheremaybewasonehundredandsixtydagopigsonce,butwakeupdon\'tbeabacknumber。I\'vegoteveneighthundred,nowshallIcollectforeighthundredorwhat,howaboutsixty-fourdollarsIpaidoutforcabbages。\"

  ItrequiredagreatmanylettersbackandforthbeforetheAuditDepartmentwasabletounderstandwhytheerrorhadbeenmadeofbillingonehundredandsixtyinsteadofeighthundred,andstillmoretimeforittogetthemeaningofthe\"cabbages。\"

  Flannerywascrowdedintoafewfeetattheextremefrontoftheoffice。

  Thepigshadalltherestoftheroomandtwoboyswereemployedconstantlyattendingtothem。ThedayafterFlanneryhadcountedtheguinea-pigstherewereeightmoreaddedtohisdrove,andbythetimetheAuditDepartmentgavehimauthoritytocollectforeighthundredFlanneryhadgivenupallattemptstoattendtothereceiptorthedeliveryofgoods。Hewashastilybuildinggalleriesaroundtheexpressoffice,tierabovetier。Hehadfourthousandandsixty-fourguinea-pigstocarefor!

  Morewerearrivingdaily。

  ImmediatelyfollowingitsauthorizationtheAuditDepartmentsentanotherletter,butFlannerywastoobusytoopenit。Theywroteanotherandthentheytelegraphed:

  \"Erroringuinea-pigbill。Collectfortwoguinea-pigs,fiftycents。

  Deliveralltoconsignee。\"

  Flanneryreadthetelegramandcheeredup。HewroteoutabillasrapidlyashispencilcouldtraveloverpaperandranallthewaytotheMorehousehome。Atthegatehestoppedsuddenly。Thehousestaredathimwithvacanteyes。Thewindowswerebareofcurtainsandhecouldseeintotheemptyrooms。Asignontheporchsaid,\"ToLet。\"Mr。Morehousehadmoved!

  Flanneryranallthewaybacktotheexpressoffice。Sixty-nineguinea-pigshadbeenbornduringhisabsence。Heranoutagainandmadefeverishinquiriesinthevillage。Mr。Morehousehadnotonlymoved,buthehadleftWestcote。Flanneryreturnedtotheexpressofficeandfoundthattwohundredandsixguinea-pigshadenteredtheworldsinceheleftit。HewroteatelegramtotheAuditDepartment。

  \"Can\'tcollectfiftycentsfortwodagopigsconsigneehaslefttownaddressunknownwhatshallIdo?Flannery。\"

  ThetelegramwashandedtooneoftheclerksintheAuditDepartment,andashereadithelaughed。

  \"Flannerymustbecrazy。Heoughttoknowthatthethingtodoistoreturntheconsignmenthere,\"saidtheclerk。HetelegraphedFlannerytosendthepigstothemainofficeofthecompanyatFranklin。

  WhenFlanneryreceivedthetelegramhesettowork。Thesixboysbehadengagedtohelphimalsosettowork。Theyworkedwiththehasteofdesperatemen,makingcagesoutofsoapboxes,crackerboxes,andallkindsofboxes,andasfastasthecageswerecompletedtheyfilledthemwithguinea-pigsandexpressedthemtoFranklin。DayafterdaythecagesofguineapigsflowedinasteadystreamfromWestcotetoFranklin,andstillFlanneryandhissixhelpersrippedandnailedandpacked——relentlesslyandfeverishly。Attheendoftheweektheyhadshippedtwohundredandeightycasesofguinea-pigs,andtherewereintheexpressofficesevenhundredandfourmorepigsthanwhentheybeganpackingthem。

  \"Stopsendingpigs。Warehousefull,\"cameatelegramtoFlannery。Hestoppedpackingonlylongenoughtowireback,\"Can\'tstop,\"andkeptonsendingthem。OnthenexttrainupfromFranklincameoneofthecompany\'sinspectors。Hehadinstructionstostopthestreamofguinea-pigsatallhazards。AshistraindrewupatWestcotestationhesawacattlecarstandingontheexpresscompany\'ssiding。Whenhereachedtheexpressofficehesawtheexpresswagonbackeduptothedoor。Sixboyswerecarryingbushelbasketsfullofguinea-pigsfromtheofficeanddumpingthemintothewagon。InsidetheroomFlannery,with\'hiscoatandvestoff,wasshovelingguinea-pigsintobushelbasketswithacoalscoop。Hewaswindinguptheguinea-pigepisode。

  Helookedupattheinspectorwithasnortofanger。

  \"Wanwagonloadmorean,I\'llbequitofthim,an\'niverwillyecatchFlannerywidnomoreforeignpigsonhishands。No,sur!Theynearwasthedeatho\'me。NixttoimeI\'llknowthatpigsofwhaivernationalityisdomisticpets——an\'goatthelowestrate。\"

  Hebeganshovelingagainrapidly,speakingquicklybetweenbreaths。

  \"Rulesmayberules,butyoucan\'tfoolMikeFlannerytwicewidthesamethrick——whinutcomestolivestock,dangtherules。SolongasFlanneryrunsthisexprissoffice——pigsispets——an\'cowsispets——an\'horsesispets——an\'lionsan\'tigersan\'RockyMountaingoatsispets——an\'therateonthimistwinty-foivecints。\"

  Hepausedlongenoughtoletoneoftheboysputanemptybasketintheplaceoftheonehehadjustfilled。Therewereonlyafewguinea-pigsleft。Ashenotedtheirlimitednumberhisnaturalhabitoflookingonthebrightsidereturned。

  \"Well,annyhow,\"hesaidcheerfully,\"\'tisnotsobadasutmightbe。

  Whatifthimdagopigshadbeenelephants!\"

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