第3章
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  ThisthawinhisdivinitysentArmstrong\'sheartgoingfaster。SomightanArcticexplorerthrillathisfirstkenofgreenfieldsandliquescentwaters。Theywereonalowerplaneofearthandlifeandweresuccumbingtoitspeculiar,subtleinfluence。Theausterityofthehillsnolongerthinnedtheairtheybreathed。Aboutthemwasthebreathoffruitandcornandbuildedhomes,thecomfortablesmellofsmokeandwarmearthandtheconsolationsmanhasplacedbetweenhimselfandthedustofhisbrotherearthfromwhichhesprung。Whiletraversingthoseawfulmountains,Mile。Giraudhadseemedtobewrappedintheirspiritofreverentreserve。

  Wasthisthatsamewoman——nowpalpitating,warm,eager,throbbingwithconsciouslifeandcharm,femininetoherfinger-tips?Ponderingoverthis,Armstrongfeltcertainmisgivingsintrudeuponhisthoughts。Hewishedhecouldstoptherewiththischangingcreature,descendingnofarther。Herewastheelevationandenvironmenttowhichhernatureseemedtorespondwithitsbest。Hefearedtogodownupontheman-dominatedlevels。Wouldherspirit-notyieldstillfurtherinthatartificialzonetowhichtheyweredescending?

  Nowfromalittleplateautheysawtheseaflashattheedgeofthegreenlowlands。Mile。Giraudgavealittle,catchingsigh。

  \"Oh!look,Mr。Armstrong,thereisthesea!Isn\'titlovely?I\'msotiredofmountains。\"Sheheavedaprettyshoulderinagestureofrepugnance。\"ThosehorridIndians!JustthinkofwhatIsuffered!AlthoughIsupposeIattainedmyambitionofbecomingastellarattraction,Iwouldn\'tcaretorepeattheengagement。Itwasveryniceofyoutobringmeaway。Tellme,Mr。

  Armstrong——honestly,now——doIlooksuchanawful,awfulfright?Ihaven\'tlookedintoamirror,youknow,formonths。\"

  Armstrongmadeansweraccordingtohischangedmoods。Alsohelaidhishanduponhersasitresteduponthehornofhersaddle。Luiswasattheheadofthepacktrainandcouldnotsee。Sheallowedittoremainthere,andhereyessmiledfranklyintohis。

  Thenatsundowntheydroppeduponthecoastlevelunderthepalmsandlemonsamongthevividgreensandsearletsandochresofthetierracaliente。TheyrodeintoMacuto,andsawthelineofvolatilebathersfrolick-

  inginthesurf。Themountainswereveryfaraway。

  Mlle。Giraud\'seyeswereshiningwithajoythatcouldnothaveexistedunderthechaperonageofthemountain-

  tops。Therewereotherspiritscallingtoher——nymphsoftheorangegroves,pixiesfromthechatteringsurf,imps,bornofthemusic,theperfumes,coloursandtheinsinuatingpresenceofhumanity。Shelaughedaloud,musically,atasuddenthought。

  \"Won\'ttherebeasensation?\"shecalledtoArmstrong。

  \"Don\'tIwishIhadanengagementjustnow,though!

  Whatapicnicthepressagentwouldhave!\'HeldaprisonerbyabandofsavageIndianssubduedbythespellofherwonderfulvoice\'——wouldn\'tthatmakegreatstuff?ButIguessIquitthegamewinner,anyhow——

  thereoughttobeacoupleofthousanddollarsinthatsackofgolddustIcollectedasencores,don\'tyouthink?\"

  HeleftheratthedoorofthelittleHoteldeBuenDescansar,whereshehadstoppedbefore。Twohourslaterhereturnedtothehotel。Heglancedinattheopendoorofthelittlecombinedreceptionroomandcafe。

  HalfadozenofMacuto\'srepresentativesocialandofficialcaballerosweredistributedabouttheroom。

  SefiorVillablanca,thewealthyrubberconcessionist,reposedhisfatfigureontwochairs,withanemollientsmilebeaminguponhischocolate-colouredface。Guil-

  bert,theFrenchminingengineer,leeredthroughhispolishednose-glasses。ColonelMendez,oftheregulararmy,ingold-laceduniformandfatuousgrin,wasbusilyextractingcorksfromchampagnebottles。Otherpat-

  ternsofMacutiangallantryandfashionprancedandposed。Theairwashazywithcigarettesmoke。Winedrippeduponthefloor。

  PercheduponatableinthecentreoftheroominanattitudeofeasypreeminencewasMlle。Giraud。A

  chiccostumeofwhitelawnandcherryribbonssupplantedhertravellinggarb。Therewasasuggestionoflace,andafrillortwo,withadiscreet,smallimplicationofhand-

  embroideredpinkhosiery。Uponherlaprestedaguitar。

  Inherfacewasthelightofresurrection,thepeaceofelysiumattainedthroughfireandsuffering。Shewassingingtoalivelyaccompanimentalittlesong:

  \"WhenyouseedebigroundmoonComin\'uplikeaballoon,DisniggerskipsfurtokissdelipsObhisstylish,black-facedcoon。\"

  ThesingercaughtsightofArmstrong。

  \"Hi!there,Johnny,\"shecalled;\"I\'vebeenexpectingyouforanhour。Whatkeptyou?Gee!butthesesmokedguysaretheslowestyoueversaw。Theyain\'ton,atall。Comealongin,andI\'llmakethiscoffee-

  colouredoldsportwiththegoldepaulettesopenoneforyourightofftheice。\"

  \"Thankyou,\"saidArmstrong;\"notjustnow,I

  believe。I\'veseveralthingstoattendto。\"

  Hewalkedoutanddownthestreet,andmetRuckercomingupfromtheConsulate。

  \"Playyouagameofbilliards,\"saidArmstrong。\"I

  wantsomethingtotakethetasteofthesealeveloutofmymouth。\"

  \"GIRL\"

  INGILTlettersonthegroundglassofthedoorofroomNo。962werethewords:\"Robbins&Hartley,Brokers。\"Theclerkshadgone。Itwaspastfive,andwiththesolidtrampofadroveofprizePercherons,scrub-

  womenwereinvadingthecloud-cappedtwenty-storyofficebuilding。Apuffofred-hotairflavouredwithlemonpeelings,soft-coalsmokeandtrainoilcameinthroughthehalf-openwindows。

  Robbins,fifty,somethingofanoverweightbeau,andaddictedtofirstnightsandhotelpalm-rooms,pretendedtobeenviousofhispartner\'scommuter\'sjoys。

  \"Goingtobesomethingdoinginthehumiditylineto-night,\"hesaid。\"Youout-of-townchapswillbethepeople,withyourkatydidsandmoonlightandlongdrinksandthingsoutonthefrontporch。\"

  Hartley,twenty-nine,serious,thin,good-looking,ner-

  vous,sighedandfrownedalittle。

  \"Yes,\"saidhe,\"wealwayshavecoolnightsinFloral-

  hurst,especiallyinthewinter。\"

  AmanwithanairofmysterycameinthedoorandwentuptoHartley。

  \"I\'vefoundwhereshelives,\"heannouncedintheportentoushalf-whisperthatmakesthedetectiveatworkamarkedbeingtohisfellowmen。

  Hartleyscowledhimintoastateofdramaticsilenceandquietude。ButbythattimeRobbinshadgothiscaneandsethistiepintohisliking,andwithadebonairnodwentouttohismetropolitanamusements。

  \"Hereistheaddress,\"saidthedetectiveinanaturaltone,beingdeprivedofanaudiencetofoil。

  Hartleytooktheleaftornoutofthesleuth\'sdingymemorandumbook。Onitwerepencilledthewords\"VivienneArlington,No。341East——thStreet,careofMrs。McComus。\"

  \"Movedthereaweekago,\"saidthedetective。\"Now,ifyouwantanyshadowingdone,Mr。Hartley,Icandoyouasfineajobinthatlineasanybodyinthecity。Itwillbeonly$7adayandexpenses。Cansendinadailytypewrittenreport,covering——\"

  \"Youneedn\'tgoon,\"interruptedthebroker。\"Itisn\'tacaseofthatkind。Imerelywantedtheaddress。

  HowmuchshallIpayyou?\"

  \"Oneday\'swork,\"saidthesleuth。\"Atennerwillcoverit。\"

  Hartleypaidthemananddismissedhim。ThenhelefttheofficeandboardedaBroadwaycar。Atthefirstlargecrosstownarteryoftravelhetookaneastboundcarthatdepositedhiminadecayingavenue,whoseancientstructuresonceshelteredtheprideandgloryofthetown。

  Walkingafewsquares,hecametothebuildingthathesought。Itwasanewflathouse,bearingcarveduponitscheapstoneportalitssonorousname,\"TheVallambrosa。\"

  Fire-escapeszigzaggeddownitsfront——theseladenwithhouseholdgoods,dryingclothes,andsquallingchildrenevictedbythemidsummerheat。Hereandthereapalerubberplantpeepedfromthemiscellaneousmass,asifwonderingtowhatkingdomitbelonged——

  vegetable,animalorartificial。

  Hartleypressedthe\"McComus\"button。Thedoorlatchclickedspasmodically——nowhospitably,nowdoubt-

  fully,asthoughinanxietywhetheritmightbeadmittingfriendsorduns。Hartleyenteredandbegantoclimbthestairsafterthemannerofthosewhoseektheirfriendsincityflat-houses——whichisthemannerofaboywhoclimbsanapple-tree,stoppingwhenhecomesuponwhathewants。

  OnthefourthfloorhesawViviennestandinginanopendoor。Sheinvitedhiminside,withanodandabright,genuinesmile。Sheplacedachairforhimnearawindow,andpoisedherselfgracefullyupontheedgeofoneofthoseJekyll-and-Hydepiecesoffurniturethataremaskedandmysteriouslyhooded,unguessablebulksbydayandinquisitorialracksoftorturebynight。

  Hartleycastaquick,critical,appreciativeglanceatherbeforespeaking,andtoldhimselfthathistasteinchoosinghadbeenflawless。

  Viviennewasabouttwenty-one。ShewasofthepurestSaxontype。Herhairwasaruddygolden,eachfilamentoftheneatlygatheredmassshiningwithitsownlustreanddelicategraduationofcolour。Inperfectharmonywereherivory-clearcomplexionanddeepsea-blueeyesthatlookedupontheworldwiththeingenuouscalmnessofamermaidorthepixieofanundiscoveredmountainstream。Herframewasstrongandyetpossessedthegraceofabsolutenaturalness。AndyetwithallherNorth-

  ernclearnessandfranknessoflineandcolouring,thereseemedtobesomethingofthetropicsinher——somethingoflanguorinthedroopofherpose,ofloveofeaseinheringeniouscomplacencyofsatisfactionandcomfortinthemereactofbreathing——somethingthatseemedtoclaimforherarightasaperfectworkofnaturetoexistandbeadmiredequallywitharareflowerorsomebeauti-

  ful,milk-whitedoveamongitssober-huedcompanions。

  Shewasdressedinawhitewaistanddarkskirt-thatdiscreetmasqueradeofgoose-girlandduchess。

  \"Vivienne,\"saidHartley,lookingatherpleadingly,\"youdidnotanswermylastletter。Itwasonlybynearlyaweek\'ssearchthatIfoundwhereyouhadmovedto。

  WhyhaveyoukeptmeinsuspensewhenyouknewhowanxiouslyIwaswaitingtoseeyouandhearfromyou?\"

  Thegirllookedoutthewindowdreamily。

  \"Mr。Hartley,\"shesaidhesitatingly,\"Ihardlyknowwhattosaytoyou。Irealizealltheadvantagesofyouroffer,andsometimesIfeelsurethatIcouldbecontentedwithyou。But,again,Iamdoubtful。Iwasbornacitygirl,andIamafraidtobindmyselftoaquietsub-

  urbanlife。\"

  \"Mydeargirl,\"saidHartley,ardently,\"haveInottoldyouthatyoushallhaveeverythingthatyourheartcandesirethatisinmypowertogiveyou?Youshallcometothecityforthetheatres,forshoppingandtovisityourfriendsasoftenasyoucareto。Youcantrustme,canyounot?\"

  \"Tothefullest,\"shesaid,turningherfrankeyesuponhimwithasmile。\"Iknowyouarethekindestofmen,andthatthegirlyougetwillbealuckyone。IlearnedallaboutyouwhenIwasattheMontgomerys\'。\"

  \"Ah!\"exclaimedHartley,withatender,reminiscentlightinhiseye;\"IrememberwelltheeveningIfirstsawyouattheMontgomerys\'。Mrs。Montgomerywassound-

  ingyourpraisestomealltheevening。Andshehardlydidyoujustice。Ishallneverforgetthatsupper。Come,Vivienne,promiseme。Iwantyou。You\'llneverregretcomingwithme。Nooneelsewillevergiveyouaspleasantahome。\"

  Thegirlsighedandlookeddownatherfoldedhands。

  AsuddenjealoussuspicionseizedHartley。

  \"Tellme,Vivienne,\"heasked,regardingherkeenly,\"isthereanother——istheresomeoneelse?\"

  Arosyflushcreptslowlyoverherfaircheeksandneck。

  \"Youshouldn\'taskthat,Mr。Hartley,\"shesaid,insomeconfusion。\"ButIwilltellyou。Thereisoneother——buthehasnoright——Ihavepromisedhimnothing。\"

  \"Hisname?\"demandedHartley,sternly。

  \"Townsend。\"

  \"RaffordTownsend!\"exclaimedHartley,withagrimtighteningofhisjaw。\"Howdidthatmancometoknowyou?AfterallI\'vedoneforhim——\"

  \"Hisautohasjuststoppedbelow,\"saidVivienne,bendingoverthewindow-sill。\"He\'scomingforhisanswer。OhIdon\'tknowwhattodo!\"

  Thebellintheflatkitchenwhirred。Viviennehurriedtopressthelatchbutton。

  \"Stayhere,\"saidHartley。\"Iwillmeethiminthehall。\"

  Townsend,lookinglikeaSpanishgrandeeinhislighttweeds,Panamahatandcurlingblackmustache,cameupthestairsthreeatatime。HestoppedatsightofHartleyandlookedfoolish。

  \"Goback,\"saidHartley,firmly,pointingdownstairswithhisforefinger。

  \"Hullo!\"saidTownsend,feigningsurprise。\"What\'sup?Whatareyoudoinghere,oldman?\"

  \"Goback,\"repeatedHartley,inflexibly。\"TheLawoftheJungle。DoyouwantthePacktotearyouinpieces?Thekillismine。\"

  \"Icameheretoseeaplumberaboutthebathroomconnections,\"saidTownsend,bravely。

  \"Allright,\"saidHartley。\"Youshallhavethatlyingplastertostickuponyourtraitoroussoul。But,goback。\"

  Townsendwentdownstairs,leavingabitterwordtobewaftedupthedraughtofthestaircase。Hartleywentbacktohiswooing。

  \"Vivienne,\"saidhe,masterfully。\"Ihavegottohaveyou。Iwilltakenomorerefusalsordilly-dallying。\"

  \"Whendoyouwantme?\"sheasked。

  \"Now。Assoonasyoucangetready。\"

  Shestoodcalmlybeforehimandlookedhimintheeye。

  \"Doyouthinkforonemoment,\"shesaid,\"thatIwouldenteryourhomewhileH閘oiseisthere?\"

  Hartleycringedasiffromanunexpectedblow。Hefoldedhisarmsandpacedthecarpetonceortwice。

  \"Sheshallgo,\"hedeclaredgrimly。Dropsstooduponhisbrow。\"WhyshouldIletthatwomanmakemylifemiserable?NeverhaveIseenonedayoffreedomfromtroublesinceIhaveknownher。Youareright,Vivienne。H閘oisemustbesentawaybeforeIcantakeyouhome。Butsheshallgo。Ihavedecided。Iwillturnherfrommydoors。\"

  \"Whenwillyoudothis?\"askedthegirl。

  Hartleyclinchedhisteethandbenthisbrowstogether。

  \"To-night,\"hesaid,resolutely。\"Iwillsendherawayto-night。\"

  \"Then,\"saidVivienne,\"myansweris\'yes。\'Comeformewhenyouwill。\"

  Shelookedintohiseyeswithasweet,sincerelightinherown。Hartleycouldscarcelybelievethathersur-

  renderwastrue,itwassoswiftandcomplete。

  \"Promiseme,\"hesaidfeelingly,\"onyourwordandhonour。\"

  \"Onmywordandhonour,\"repeatedVivienne,softly。

  Atthedoorheturnedandgazedatherhappily,butyetasonewhoscarcelytruststhefoundationsofhisjoy。

  \"To-morrow,\"hesaid,withaforefingerofreminderuplifted。

  \"To-morrow,\"sherepeatedwithasmileoftruthandcandour。

  InanhourandfortyminutesHartleysteppedoffthetrainatFloralhurst。Abriskwalkoftenminutesbroughthimtothegateofahandsometwo-storycottagesetuponawideandwell-tendedlawn。Halfwaytothehousehewasmetbyawomanwithjet-blackbraidedhairandflowingwhitesummergown,whohalfstrangledhimwithoutapparentcause。

  Whentheysteppedintothehallshesaid:

  \"Mamma\'shere。Theautoiscomingforherinhalfanhour。Shecametodinner,butthere\'snodinner。\"

  \"I\'vesomethingtotellyou,\"saidHartley。\"Ithoughttobreakittoyougently,butsinceyourmotherisherewemayaswelloutwithit。\"

  Hestoopedandwhisperedsomethingatherear。

  Hiswifescreamed。Hermothercamerunningintothehall。Thedark-hairedwomanscreamedagain-

  thejoyfulscreamofawell-belovedandpettedwoman。

  \"Oh,mamma!\"shecriedecstatically,\"whatdoyouthink?Vivienneiscomingtocookforus!SheistheonethatstayedwiththeMontgomerysawholeyear。

  Andnow,Billy,dear,\"sheconcluded,\"youmustgorightdownintothekitchenanddischargeH閘oise。Shehasbeendrunkagainthewholedaylong。\"

  SOCIOLOGYINSERGEANDSTRAW

  Theseasonofirresponsibilityisathand。Come,letustwineroundourbrowswreathsofpoisonivythatisforidiocy,andwanderhandinhandwithsociologyinthesummerfields。

  Likelyasnottheworldisflat。Thewisemenhavetriedtoprovethatitisround,withindifferentsuccess。

  Theypointedouttousashipgoingtosea,andbadeusobservethat,atlength,theconvexityoftheearthhidfromourviewallbutthevessel\'stopmast。Butwepickedupatelescopeandlooked,andsawthedecksandhullagain。Thenthewisemensaid:\"Oh,pshaw!

  anyhow,thevariationoftheintersectionoftheequatorandtheeclipticprovesit。\"Wecouldnotseethisthroughourtelescope,soweremainedsilent。Butitstandstoreasonthat,iftheworldwereround,thequeuesofChina-

  Menwouldstandstraightupfromtheirheadsinsteadofhangingdowntheirbacks,astravellersassureustheydo。

  Anotherhot-weathercorroborationoftheflattheoryisthefactthatalloflife,asweknowit,movesinlittle,unavailingcircles。Morejustlythantoanythingelse,itcanbelikenedtothegameofbaseball。Crack!wehittheball,andawaywego。Ifweearnaruninlifewecallitsuccesswegetbacktothehomeplateandsituponabench。Ifwearethrownout,wewalkbacktothehomeplate——andsituponabench。

  Thecircumnavigatorsoftheallegedglobemayhavesailedtherimofawaterycirclebacktothesameportagain。Thetrulygreatreturnatthehightideoftheirattainmentstothesimplicityofachild。Thebillionairesitsdownathismahoganytohisbowlofbreadandmilk。Whenyoureachtheendofyourcareer,justtakedownthesign\"Goal\"andlookattheothersideofit。Youwillfind\"BeginningPoint\"there。Ithasbeenreversedwhileyouweregoingaroundthetrack。

  Butthisishumour,andmustbestopped。LetusgetbacktotheseriousquestionsthatarisewheneverSociologyturnssummerboarder。Youareinvitedtoconsiderthesceneofthestory-wild,Atlanticwaves,thunderingagainstawoodedandrock-boundshore——

  intheGreaterCityofNewYork。

  ThetownofFishampton,onthesouthshoreofLongIsland,isnotedforitsclamfrittersandthesummerresidenceoftheVanPlushvelts。

  TheVanPlushveltshaveahundredmilliondollars,andtheirnameisahouseholdwordwithtradesmenandphotographers。

  OnthefifteenthofJunetheVanPlushveltsboardedupthefrontdooroftheircityhouse,carefullydepositedtheircatonthesidewalk,instructedthecaretakernottoallowittoeatanyoftheivyonthewalls,andwhizzedawayina40-horse-powertoFishamptontostrayalonetheshade——Amaryllisnotbeingintheirclass。IfasubscribertotheToadies\'Magazine,youhaveoften——Yousayyouarenot?Well,youbuyitatanews-stand,thinkingthatthenewsdealerisnotwisetoyou。Butheknowsaboutitall。HEknows——HE

  knows!IsaythatyouhaveoftenseenintheToadies\'

  MagazinepicturesoftheVanPlushvelts\'summerhome;

  soitwillnotbedescribedhere。OurbusinessiswithyoungHaywoodVanPlushvelt,sixteenyearsold,heirtothecenturyofmillions,darlingofthefinancialgodsandgreatgrandsonofPeterVanPlushvelt,formerownerofaparticularlyfinecabbagepatchthathasbeenruinedbyanintrusivelotofdowntownskyscrapers。

  OneafternoonyoungHaywoodVanPlushveltstrolledoutbetweenthegranitegatepostsof\"DolcefarNiente\"——

  that\'swhattheycalledtheplace;anditwasanimprove-

  mentondolceFarRockaway,Icantellyou。

  Haywoodwalkeddownintothevillage。Hewashuman,afterall,andhisprospectivemillionsweigheduponhim。Wealthhadwreakeduponhimitsdirefullest。

  Hewastheproductofprivatetutors。Evenunderhisfirsthobby-horsehadtanbarkbeenstrewn。Hehadbeenbornwithagoldspoon,lobsterforkandfish-setinhismouth。ForwhichIhope,later,tosubmitjustification,Imustaskyourconsiderationofhishaberdasheryandtailoring。

  YoungFortunatuswasdressedinaneatsuitofdarkblueserge,aneat,whitestrawhat,neatlow-cuttanshoes,ofthewell-known\"immaculate\"trademark,aneat,narrowfour-in-handtie,andcarriedaslender,neat,bamboocane。

  DownPersimmonStreetthere\'snevertreenorthofHagerstown,Md。camefromthevillage\"Smoky\"

  Dodson,fifteenandahalf,worstboyinFishampton。

  \"Smoky\"wasdressedinaraggedredsweater,wreckedandweather-worngolfcap,run-overshoes,andtrousersofthe\"serviceable\"brand。Dust,clingingtothemois-

  tureinducedbyfreeexercise,darkenedwideareasofhisface。\"Smoky\"carriedabaseballbat,andaleagueballthatadvertiseditselfintherotundityofhistrouserspocket。Haywoodstoppedandpassedthetimeofday。

  \"Goingtoplayball?\"heasked。

  \"Smoky\'s\"eyesandcountenanceconfrontedhimwithafrankblue-and-freckledscrutiny。

  \"Me?\"hesaid,withdeadlymildness;\"surenot。

  Can\'tyouseeI\'vegotadivin\'suiton?I\'mgoin\'upinasubmarineballoontocatchbutterflieswithatwo-inchauger。

  \"Excuseme,\"saidHaywood,withtheinsultingpolite——

  nessofhiscaste,\"formistakingyouforagentleman。I

  mighthaveknownbetter。\"

  \"HowmightyouhaveknownbetterifyouthoughtI

  wasone?\"said\"Smoky,\"unconsciouslyalogician。

  \"Byyourappearances,\"saidHaywood。\"Nogentle-

  manisdirty,raggedandaliar。\"

  \"Smoky\"hootedoncelikeaferry-boat,spatonhishand,gotafirmgriponhisbaseballbatandthendroppeditagainstthefence。

  \"Say,\"saidhe,\"Iknowsyou。You\'rethepupthatbelongsinthatswellprivatesummersanitariumforcity-

  guysoverthere。Iseenyoucomeoutofthegate。Youcan\'tbluffnobodybecauseyou\'rerich。Andbecauseyougotonswellclothes。Arabella!Yah!\"

  \"Ragamuffin!\"saidHay-wood。

  \"Smoky\"pickedupafence-railsplinterandlaiditonhisshoulder。

  \"Dareyoutoknockitoff,\"hechallenged。

  \"Iwouldn\'tsoilmyhandswithyou,\"saidthearistocrat。

  \"\'Fraid,\"said\"Smoky\"concisely。\"Yousecity-

  ducksain\'tgottheIsand。Ikinlickyouwithone-

  hand。\"

  \"Idon\'twishtohaveanytroublewithyou,\"saidHaywood。\"Iaskedyouacivilquestion;andyoureplied,likea——likea——acad。\"

  \"Wot\'sacad?\"asked\"Smoky。\"

  \"Acadisadisagreeableperson,\"answeredHaywood,\"wholacksmannersanddoesn\'tknowhisplace。They,sometimesplaybaseball。\"

  \"Icantellyouwhatamollycoddleis,\"said\"Smoky。\"

  \"It\'samonkeydressedupbyitsmotherandsentouttoopickdaisiesonthelawn。\"

  \"Whenyouhavethehonourtorefertothemembersofmyfamily,\"saidHaywood,withsomedimideasofacodeinhismind,\"you\'dbetterleavetheladiesoutofyourremarks。\"

  \"Ho!ladies!\"mockedtherudeone。\"Isayladies!

  Iknowwhatthemrichwomeninthecitydoes。They,drinkcocktailsandswearandgivepartiestogorillas。

  Thepaperssaysso。\"

  ThenHaywoodknewthatitmustbe。Hetookoffhiscoat,foldeditneatlyandlaiditontheroadsidegrass,placedhishatuponitandbegantounknothisbluesilktie。

  \"Hadn\'tyerbetterringferyermaid,Arabella?\"

  taunted\"Smoky。\"\"Wotyergoingtodo——gotobed?\"

  \"I\'mgoingtogiveyouagoodtrouncing,\"saidthehero。Hedidnothesitate,althoughtheenemywasfarbeneathhimsocially。Herememberedthathisfatheroncethrashedacabman,andthepapersgaveittwocol-

  umns,firstpage。AndtheToadies\'MagazinehadaspecialarticleonUpperCutsbytheUpperClasses,andrannewpicturesoftheVanPlushveltcountryseat,atFishampton。

  \"Wot\'strouncing?\"asked\"Smoky,\"suspiciously。

  \"Idon\'twantyouroldclothes。I\'mno——oh,youmeantoscrap!My,my!Iwon\'tdoathingtomamma\'spet。

  Criminy!I\'dhatetobeahand-launderedthinglikeyou。

  \"Smoky\"waitedwithsomeawkwardnessforhisadversarytoprepareforbattle。Hisowndeckswerealwaysclearforaction。Whenheshouldspituponthepalmofhisterriblerightitwasequivalentto\"Youmayfirenow,Gridley。\"

  Thehatedpatricianadvanced,withhisshirtsleevesneatlyrolledup。\"Smoky\"waited,inanattitudeofease,expectingtheaffairtobeconductedaccordingtoFishampton\'srulesofwar。Theseallowedcombattobeprefacedbystigma,recrimination,epithet,abuseandinsultgraduallyincreasinginemphasisanddegree。

  Afteraroundofthese\"you\'reanothers\"wouldcomethechipknockedfromtheshoulder,ortheadvanceacrossthe\"dare\"linedrawnwithatoeontheground。Nextlighttapsgivenandtaken,thesealsoincreasinginforceuntilfinallythebloodwasupandfistsgoingattheirbest。

  ButHaywooddidnotknowFishampton\'srules。

  Noblesseobligekeptafaintsmileonhisfaceashewalkedslowlyupto\"Smoky\"andsaid:

  \"Goingtoplayball?\"

  \"Smoky\"quicklyunderstoodthistobeaputtingofthepreviousquestion,givinghimthechancetomakepracticalapologybyansweringitwithcivilityandrelevance。

  \"Listenthistime,\'saidhe。\"I\'mgoin\'skatin\'ontheriver。Don\'tyouseemeautomobilewithChineselanternsonitstandin\'andwaitin\'forme?\"

  Haywoodknockedhimdown。

  \"Smoky\"feltwronged。Tothusdeprivehimofpreliminarywrangleandobjurgationwastosendanarmouredknightfulltiltagainstacrashinglancewithoutpermittinghimfirsttocaracolearoundthelisttotheflourishoftrumpets。Buthescrambledupandfelluponhisfoe,head,feetandfists。

  Thefightlastedoneroundofanhourandtenminutes。

  Itwaslengtheneduntilitwasmorelikeawarorafamilyfeudthanafight。Haywoodhadlearnedsomeofthescienceofboxingandwrestlingfromhistutors,butthesehediscardedforthemoreinstinctivemethodsofbattlehandeddownbythecave-dwellingVanPlushvelts。

  So,whenhefoundhimself,duringthem阬閑,seateduponthekickingandroaring\"Smoky\'s\"chest,heimprovedtheopportunitybyvigorouslykneadinghand-

  fulsofsandandsoilintohisadversary\'sears,eyesandmouth,andwhen\"Smoky\"gottheproperlegholdand\"turned\"him,hefastenedbothhandsinthePlushvelthairandpoundedthePlushveltheadagainstthelapofmotherearth。Ofcourse,thestrifewasnotincessantlyactive。Therewereseasonswhenonesatupontheother,holdinghimdown,whileeachblewlikeagrampus,spatoutthemoreinconvenientlylargesectionsofgravelandandstrovetosubduethespiritofhisopponentwithafrightfulandsoul-paralyzingglare。

  Atlast,itseemedthatinthelanguageofthering,theireffortslackedsteam。Theybrokeaway,andeachdisappearedinacloudashebrushedawaythedustoftheconflict。Assoonashisbreathpermitted,Haywoodwalkedcloseto\"Smoky\"andsaid:

  \"Goingtoplayball?\"

  \"Smoky\"lookedpensivelyatthesky,athisbatlyingontheground,andatthe\"leaguer\"roundinghispocket。

  \"Sure,\"hesaid,offhandedly。\"The\'Yellowjackets\'\"

  playsthe\'LongIslands。\'I\'mcap\'nofthe\'LongIslands。\'

  \"IguessIdidn\'tmeantosayyouwereragged,\"saidHaywood。\"Butyouaredirty,youknow。\"

  \"Sure,\"said\"Smoky。\"\"Yergetthatwayknockin\'

  around。Say,Idon\'tbelievethemNewYorkpapersaboutladiesdrinkin\'andhavin\'monkeysdinin\'atthetablewith\'em。Iguessthey\'relies,liketheyprintaboutpeopleeatin\'outofsilverplates,andownin\'dogsthatcost$100。\"

  \"Certainly,\"saidHaywood。\"Whatdoyouplayonyourteam?\"

  \"Ketcher。Everplayany?\"

  \"Neverinmylife,\"saidHaywood。\"I\'veneverknownanyfellowsexceptoneortwoofmycousins。\"

  \"Jerliketolearn?We\'regoin\'tohaveapractice-

  gamebeforethematch。Wantercomealong?I\'llputyerinleft-field,andyerwon\'tbelongketchin\'on。\"

  \"I\'dlikeitbully,\"saidHaywood。\"I\'vealway-

  wantedtoplaybaseball。\"

  Theladies\'maidsofNewYorkandthefamiliesofWesternmineownerswithsocialambitionswillrememberwellthesensationthatwascreatedbythereportthattheyoungmulti-millionaire,HaywoodVanPlushvelt,wasplayingballwiththevillageyouthsofFishampton。Itwasconcededthatthemillenniumofdemocracyhadcome。Reportersandphotographersswarmedtotheisland。Thepapersprintedhalf-pagepicturesofhimasshort-stopstoppingahotgrounder。TheToadies\'

  MagazinegotoutaBatandBallnumberthatcoveredthesubjecthistorically,beginningwiththevampirebatandendingwiththePatriarchs\'ball——illustratedwithinteriorviewsoftheVanPlushveltcountryseat。

  Ministers,educatorsandsociologistseverywherehailedtheeventasthetocsincallthatproclaimedtheuniversalbrotherhoodofman。

  OneafternoonIwasrecliningunderthetreesneartheshoreatFishamptonintheesteemedcompanyofaneminent,bald-headedyoungsociologist。Bywayofnoteitmaybeinsertedthatallsociologistsaremoreorlessbald,andexactlythirty-two。Look\'emover。

  ThesociologistwascitingtheVanPlushveltcaseasthemostimportant\"uplift\"symptomofageneration,andasanexcuseforhisownexistence。

  Immediatelybeforeuswerethevillagebaseballgrounds。

  AndnowcamethesportiveyouthofFishamptonanddistributedthemselves,shouting,aboutthediamond。

  \"There,\"saidthesociologist,pointing,\"thereisyoungVanPlushvelt。\"

  IraisedmyselfsofaracosycophantwithMaryAnn

  andgazed。

  YoungVanPlushveltsatupontheground。Hewasdressedinaraggedredsweater,wreckedandweather-

  worngolfcap,run-overshoes,andtrousersofthe\"ser-

  viceable\"brand。Dustclingingtothemoistureinducedbyfreeexercise,darkenedwideareasofhisface。

  \"Thatishe,\"repeatedthesociologist。Ifhehadsaid\"him\"Icouldhavebeenlessvindictive。

  Onabench,withanair,sattheyoungmillionaire\'schum。

  Hewasdressedinaneatsuitofdarkblueserge,aneatwhitestrawhat,neatlow-cuttanshoes,linenofthewell-known\"immaculate\"trademark,aneat,narrowfour-in-handtie,andcarrieda-slender,neatbamboocane。

  Ilaughedloudlyandvulgarly。

  \"Whatyouwanttodo,\"saidItothesociologist,\"istoestablishareformatoryfortheLogicalViciousCircle。

  OrelseI\'vegotwheels。Itlookstomeasifthingsarerunningroundandroundincirclesinsteadofgettinganywhere。\"

  \"Whatdoyoumean?\"askedthemanofprogress。

  \"Why,lookwhathehasdoneto\"Smoky,\"Ireplied。

  \"Youwillalwaysbeafool,\"saidmyfriend,thesociolo-

  gist,gettingupandwalkingaway。

  THERANSOMOFREDCHIEF

  ITLOOKEDlikeagoodthing:butwaittillItellyou。

  WeweredownSouth,inAlabama——BillDriscollandmyself——whenthiskidnappingideastruckus。Itwas,asBillafterwardexpressedit,\"duringamomentoftemporarymentalapparition\";butwedidn\'tfindthatouttilllater。

  Therewasatowndownthere,asflatasaflannel-cake,andcalledSummit,ofcourse。ItcontainedinhabitantsOfasundeleteriousandself-satisfiedaclassofpeasantryaseverclusteredaroundaMaypole。

  Billandmehadajointcapitalofaboutsixhundreddollars,andweneededjusttwothousanddollarsmoretopulloffafraudulenttown-lotschemeinWesternIllinoiswith。Wetalkeditoveronthefrontstepsofthehotel。Philoprogenitiveness,sayswe,isstronginsemi-

  ruralcommunities;thereforeandforotherreasons,akidnappingprojectoughttodobettertherethanintheradiusofnewspapersthatsendreportersoutinplainclothestostiruptalkaboutsuchthings。WeknewthatSummitcouldn\'tgetafteruswithanythingstrongerthanconstablesandmaybesomelackadaisicalblood-

  houndsandadiatribeortwointheWeeklyFarmers\'

  Budget。So,itlookedgood。

  WeselectedforourvictimtheonlychildofaprominentcitizennamedEbenezerDorset。Thefatherwasrespect-

  ableandtight,amortgagefancierandastern,uprightcollection-platepasserandforecloser。Thekidwasaboyoften,withbas-relieffreckles,andhairthecolourofthecoverofthemagazineyoubuyatthenews-standwhenyouwanttocatchatrain。BillandmefiguredthatEbenezerwouldmeltdownforaransomoftwothousanddollarstoacent。ButwaittillItellyou。

  AbouttwomilesfromSummitwasalittlemountain,coveredwithadensecedarbrake。Ontherearelevationofthismountainwasacave。Therewestoredprovisions。

  Oneeveningaftersundown,wedroveinabuggypastoldDorset\'shouse。Thekidwasinthestreet,throw-

  ingrocksatakittenontheoppositefence。

  \"Hey,littleboy!\"saysBill,\"wouldyouliketohaveabagofcandyandaniceride?\"

  TheboycatchesBillneatlyintheeyewithapieceofbrick。

  \"Thatwillcosttheoldmananextrafivehundreddollars,\"saysBill,climbingoverthewheel。

  Thatboyputupafightlikeawelter-weightcinnamonbear;but,atlast,wegothimdowninthebottomofthebuggyanddroveaway。WetookhimuptothecaveandIhitchedthehorseinthecedarbrake。AfterdarkI

  drovethebuggytothelittlevillage,threemilesaway,wherewehadhiredit,andwalkedbacktothemoun-

  tain。

  Billwaspastingcourt-plasteroverthescratchesandbruisesonhisfeatures。Therewasaburningbehindthebigrockattheentranceofthecave,andtheboywaswatchingapotofboilingcoffee,withtwobuzzardtail-

  feathersstuckinhisredhair。HepointsastickatmewhenIcomeup,andsays:

  \"Ha!cursedpaleface,doyoudaretoenterthecampofRedChief,theterroroftheplains?

  \"He\'sallrightnow,\"saysBill,rollinguphistrousersandexaminingsomebruisesonhisshins。\"We\'replayingIndian。We\'remakingBuffaloBill\'sshowlooklikemagic-lanternviewsofPalestineinthetownhall。

  I\'mOldHank,theTrapper,RedChief\'scaptive,andI\'mtobescalpedatdaybreak。ByGeronimo!thatkidcankickhard。\"

  Yes,sir,thatboyseemedtobehavingthetimeofhislife。Thefunofcampingoutinacavehadmadehimforgetthathewasacaptive,himself。HeimmediatelychristenedmeSnake-eye,theSpy,andannouncedthat,whenhisbravesreturnedfromthewarpath,Iwastobebroiledatthestakeattherisingofthesun。

  Thenwehadsupper;andhefilledhismouthfullofbaconandbreadandgravy,andbegantotalk。Hemadeaduring-dinnerspeechsomethinglikethis:

  \"Ilikethisfine。Inevercampedoutbefore;butI

  hadapet\'possumonce,andIwasninelastbirthday。

  Ihatetogotoschool。RatsateupsixteenofJimmyTalbot\'saunt\'sspeckledhen\'seggs。ArethereanyrealIndiansinthesewoods?Iwantsomemoregravy。

  Doesthetreesmovingmakethewindblow?Wehadfivepuppies。Whatmakesyournosesored,Hank?

  Myfatherhaslotsofmoney。Arethestarshot?I

  whippedEdWalkertwice,Saturday。Idon\'tlikegirls。

  Youdassentcatchtoadsunlesswithastring。Dooxenmakeanynoise?Whyareorangesround?Haveyougotbedstosleeponinthiscave?AmosMurrayhasgotSixtoes。Aparrotcantalk,butamonkeyorafishcan\'t。

  Howmanydoesittaketomaketwelve?\"

  Everyfewminuteshewouldrememberthathewasapeskyredskin,andpickuphisstickrifleandtiptoetothemouthofthecavetorubberforthescoutsofthehatedpaleface。Nowandthenhewouldletoutawar-

  whoopthatmadeOldHanktheTrappershiver。ThatboyhadBillterrorizedfromthestart。

  \"RedChief,\"saysItothekid,\"wouldyouliketogohome?\"

  \"Aw,whatfor?\"sayshe。\"Idon\'thaveanyfunathome。Ihatetogotoschool。Iliketocampout。Youwon\'ttakemebackhomeagain,Snake-eye,willyou?\"

  \"Notrightaway,\"saysI。\"We\'llstayhereinthecaveawhile。\"

  \"Allright!\"sayshe。\"That\'llbefine。Ineverhadsuchfuninallmylife。\"

  Wewenttobedabouteleveno\'clock。WespreaddownsomewideblanketsandquiltsandputRedChiefbetweenus。Weweren\'tafraidhe\'drunaway。Hekeptusawakeforthreehours,jumpingupandreachingforhisrifleandscreeching:\"Hist!pard,\"inmineandBill\'sears,asthefanciedcrackleofatwigortherustleofaleafrevealedtohisyoungimaginationthestealthyapproachoftheoutlawband。Atlast,Ifellintoatroubledsleep,anddreamedthatIhadbeenkidnappedandchainedtoatreebyaferociouspiratewithredhair。

  Justatdaybreak,IwasawakenedbyaseriesofawfulscreamsfromBill。Theyweren\'tyells,orhowls,orshouts,orwhoops,oryalps,suchasyou\'dexpectfromamanlysetofvocalorgans——theyweresimplyindecent,terrifying,humiliatingscreams,suchaswomenemitwhentheyseeghostsorcaterpillars。It\'sanawfulthingtohearastrong,desperate,fatmanscreamincontinentlyinacaveatdaybreak。

  Ijumpeduptoseewhatthematterwas。RedChiefwassittingonBill\'schest,withonehandtwinedinBill\'shair。Intheotherhehadthesharpcase-knifeweusedforslicing,bacon;andhewasindustriouslyandrealisticallytryingtotakeBill\'sscalp,accordingtothesentencethathadbeenpronounceduponhimtheeveningbefore。

  Igottheknifeawayfromthekidandmadehimliedownagain。But,fromthatmoment,Bill\'sspiritwasbroken。Helaiddownonhissideofthebed,butheneverclosedaneyeagaininsleepaslongasthatboywaswithus。

  Idozedoffforawhile,butalongtowardsun-upIremem-

  beredthatRedChiefhadsaidIwastobeburnedatthestakeattherisingofthesun。Iwasn\'tnervousorafraid;

  butIsatupandlitmypipeandleanedagainstarock。

  \"Whatyougettingupsosoonfor,Sam?\"askedBill。

  \"Me?\"saysI。\"Oh,Igotakindofapaininmyshoulder。Ithoughtsittingupwouldrestit。\"

  \"You\'realiar!\"saysBill。\"You\'reafraid。Youwastobeburnedatsunrise,andyouwasafraidhe\'ddoit。Andhewould,too,ifhecouldfindamatch。

  Ain\'titawful,Sam?Doyouthinkanybodywillpayoutmoneytogetalittleimplikethatbackhome?\"

  \"Sure,\"saidI。\"Arowdykidlikethatisjustthekindthatparentsdoteon。Now,youandtheChiefgetupandcookbreakfast,whileIgouponthetopofthismountainandreconnoitre。\"

  Iwentuponthepeakofthelittlemountainandranmyeyeoverthecontiguousvicinity。OvertowardSummitI

  expectedtoseethesturdyyeomanryofthevillagearmedwithscythesandpitchforksbeatingthecountrysideforthedastardlykidnappers。ButwhatIsawwasapeacefullandscapedottedwithonemanploughingwithadunmule。Nobodywasdraggingthecreek;nocouriersdashedhitherandyon,bringingtidingsofnonewstothedistractedparents。TherewasasylvanattitudeofsomnolentsleepinesspervadingthatsectionoftheexternaloutwardsurfaceofAlabamathatlayexposedtomyview。

  \"Perhaps,\"saysItomyself,\"ithasnotyetbeendiscov-

  eredthatthewolveshavehomeawaythetenderlambkinfromthefold。Heavenhelpthewolves!\"saysI,andI

  wentdownthemountaintobreakfast。

  WhenIgottothecaveIfoundBillbackedupagainstthesideofit,breathinghard,andtheboythreateningtosmashhimwitharockhalfasbigasacocoanut。

  \"Heputared-hotboiledpotatodownmyback,\"

  explainedBill,\"andthemasheditwithhisfoot;andIboxedhisears。Haveyougotagunaboutyou,Sam?

  Itooktherockawayfromtheboyandkindofpatcheduptheargument。\"I\'llfixyou,\"saysthekidtoBill。

  \"NomaneveryetstrucktheRedChiefbutwhathegotpaidforit。Youbetterbeware!\"

  Afterbreakfastthekidtakesapieceofleatherwithstringswrappedarounditoutofhispocketandgoesout-

  sidethecaveunwindingit。

  \"What\'sheuptonow?\"saysBill,anxiously。\"Youdon\'tthinkhe\'llrunaway,doyou,Sam?\"

  \"Nofearofit,\"saysI。\"Hedon\'tseemtobemuchofahomebody。Butwe\'vegottofixupsomeplanabouttheransom。Theredon\'tseemtobemuchexcitementaroundSummitonaccountofhisdisappearance;butmaybetheyhaven\'trealizedyetthathe\'sgone。Hisfolksmaythinkhe\'sspendingthenightwithAuntJaneoroneoftheneighbours。Anyhow,he\'llbemissedto-day。

  To-nightwemustgetamessagetohisfatherdemandingthetwothousanddollarsforhisreturn。\"

  JustthenweheardakindOfwar-whoop,suchasDavidmighthaveemittedwhenheknockedoutthechampionGoliath。ItwasaslingthatRedChiefhadpulledoutofhispocket,andhewaswhirlingitaroundhishead。

  Idodged,andheardaheavythudandakindofasighfromBill,likeahorsegivesoutwhenyoutakehissaddleoff。AniggerheadrockthesizeofanegghadcaughtBilljustbehindhisleftear。Heloosenedhimselfalloverandfellinthefireacrossthefryingpanofhotwaterforwashingthedishes。Idraggedhimoutandpouredcoldwateronhisheadforhalfanhour。

  Byandby,Billsitsupandfeelsbehindhisearandsays:\"Sam,doyouknowwhomyfavouriteBiblicalcharacteris?\"

  \"Takeiteasy,\"saysI。\"You\'llcometoyoursensespresently。\"

  \"KingHerod,\"sayshe。\"Youwon\'tgoawayandleavemeherealone,willyou,Sam?\"

  Iwentoutandcaughtthatboyandshookhimuntilhisfrecklesrattled。

  \"Ifyoudon\'tbehave,\"saysI,\"I\'lltakeyoustraighthome。Now,areyougoingtobegood,ornot?\"

  \"Iwasonlyfunning,\"sayshesullenly。\"Ididn\'tmeantohurtOldHank。Butwhatdidhehitmefor?

  \"I\'llbehave,Snake-eye,ifyouwon\'tsendmehome,andifyou\'llletmeplaytheBlackScoutto-day。\"

  \"Idon\'tknowthegame,\"saysI。\"That\'sforyouandMr。Billtodecide。He\'syourplaymatefortheday。

  I\'mgoingawayforawhile,onbusiness。Now,youcomeinandmakefriendswithhimandsayyouaresorryforhurtinghim,orhomeyougo,atonce。\"

  ImadehimandBillshakehands,andthenItookBillasideandtoldhimIwasgoingtoPoplarCove,alittlevillagethreemilesfromthecave,andfindoutwhatI

  couldabouthowthekidnappinghadbeenregardedinSummit。Also,IthoughtitbesttosendaperemptorylettertooldmanDorsetthatday,demandingtheransomanddictatinghowitshouldbepaid。

  \"Youknow,Sam,\"saysBill,\"I\'vestoodbyyouwith-

  outbattinganeyeinearthquakes,fireandflood——inpokergames,dynamiteoutrages,policeraids,trainrobberiesandcyclones。Ineverlostmynerveyettillwekidnappedthattwo-leggedskyrocketofakid。He\'sgotmegoing。Youwon\'tleavemelongwithhim,willyou,Sam?\"

  \"I\'llbebacksometimethisafternoon,\"saysI。\"YoumustkeeptheboyamusedandquiettillIreturn。Andnowwe\'llwritethelettertooldDorset。\"

  BillandIgotpaperandpencilandworkedontheletterwhileRedChief,withablanketwrappedaroundhim,struttedupanddown,guardingthemouthofthecave。Billbeggedmetearfullytomaketheransomfifteenhundreddollarsinsteadoftwothousand。\"I

  ain\'tattempting,\"sayshe,\"todecrythecelebratedmoralaspectofparentalaffection,butwe\'redealingwithhumans,anditain\'thumanforanybodytogiveuptwothousanddollarsforthatforty-poundchunkoffreckledwildcat。I\'mwillingtotakeachanceatfifteenhundreddollars。Youcanchargethedifferenceuptome。\"

  So,torelieveBill,Iacceded,andwecollaboratedaletterthatranthisway:

  EbenezerDorset,Esq。:

  WehaveyourboyconcealedinaplacefarfromSummit。

  Itisuselessforyouorthemostskilfuldetectivestoattempttofindhim。Absolutely,theonlytermsonwhichyoucanhavehimrestoredtoyouarethese:Wedemandfifteenhundreddollarsinlargebillsforhisreturn;

  themoneytobeleftatmidnightto-nightatthesamespotandinthesameboxasyourreply——ashereinafterdescribed。Ifyouagreetotheseterms,sendyouranswerinwritingbyasolitarymessengerto-nightathalf-pasteighto\'clock。AftercrossingOwlCreek,ontheroadtoPoplarCove,therearethreelargetreesaboutahundredyardsapart,closetothefenceofthewheatfieldontheright-handside。Atthebottomofthefence-post,oppositethethirdtree,willbefoundasmallpasteboardbox。

  ThemessengerwillplacetheanswerinthisboxandreturnimmediatelytoSummit。

  Ifyouattemptanytreacheryorfailtocomplywithourdemandasstated,youwillneverseeyourboyagain。

  Ifyoupaythemoneyasdemanded,hewillbereturnedtoyousafeandwellwithinthreehours。Thesetermsarefinal,andifyoudonotaccedetothemnofurthercoin-

  municationwillbeattempted。

  TWODESPERATEMEN。

  IaddressedthislettertoDorset,andputitinmypocket。

  AsIwasabouttostart,thekidcomesuptomeandsays:

  \"Aw,Snake-eye,yousaidIcouldplaytheBlackScoutwhileyouwasgone。\"

  \"Playit,ofcourse,\"saysI。\"Mr。Billwillplaywithyou。Whatkindofagameisit?\"

  \"I\'mtheBlackScout,\"saysRedChief,\"andI

  havetoridetothestockadetowarnthesettlersthattheIndiansarecoming。I\'mtiredofplayingIndianmyself。

  IwanttobetheBlackScout。\"

  \"Allright,\"saysI。\"Itsoundsharmlesstome。

  IguessMr。Billwillhelpyoufoilthepeskysavages。\"

  \"WhatamItodo?\"asksBill,lookingatthekidsuspiciously。

  \"Youarethehoss,\"saysBlackScout。\"Getdownonyourhandsandknees。HowcanIridetothestockadewithoutahoss?\"

  \"You\'dbetterkeephiminterested,\"saidI,\"tillwegettheschemegoing。Loosenup。\"

  Billgetsdownonhisallfours,andalookcomesinhiseyelikearabbit\'swhenyoucatchitinatrap。

  \"Howfarisittothestockade,kid?\"heasks,inahuskymannerofvoice。

  \"Ninetymiles,\"saystheBlackScout。\"Andyouhavetohumpyourselftogetthereontime。Whoa,now!\"

  TheBlackScoutjumpsonBill\'sbackanddigshisheelsinhisside。

  \"ForHeaven\'ssake,\"saysBill,\"hurryback,Sam,assoonasyoucan。Iwishwehadn\'tmadetheransommorethanathousand。Say,youquitkickingmeorI\'llgetupandwarmyougood。\"

  IwalkedovertoPoplarCoveandsataroundthepost-

  officeandstore,talkingwiththechawbaconsthatcameintotrade。OnewhiskerandosaysthathehearsSummitisallupsetonaccountofElderEbenezerDorset\'sboyhavingbeenlostorstolen。ThatwasallIwantedtoknow。

  Iboughtsomesmokingtobacco,referredcasuallytothepriceofblack-eyedpeas,postedmylettersurreptitiouslyandcameaway。Thepostmastersaidthemail-carrierwouldcomebyinanhourtotakethemailontoSummit。

  WhenIgotbacktothecaveBillandtheboywerenottobefound。Iexploredthevicinityofthecave,andriskedayodelortwo,buttherewasnoresponse。

  SoIlightedmypipeandsatdownonamossybanktoawaitdevelopments。

  InabouthalfanhourIheardthebushesrustle,andBillwabbledoutintothelittlegladeinfrontofthecave。

  Behindhimwasthekid,steppingsoftlylikeascout,withabroadgrinonhisface。Billstopped,tookoffhishatandwipedhisfacewitharedhandkerchief。Thekidstoppedabouteightfeetbehindhim。

  \"Sam,\"saysBill,\"Isupposeyou\'llthinkI\'marene-

  gade,butIcouldn\'thelpit。I\'magrownpersonwithmasculineproclivitiesandhabitsofself-defense,butthereisatimewhenallsystemsofegotismandpredominancefail。Theboyisgone。Ihavesenthimhome。Allisoff。Therewasmartyrsinoldtimes,\"goesonBill,\"thatsuffereddeathratherthangiveuptheparticulargrafttheyenjoyed。Noneof\'emeverwassubjugatedtosuchsupernaturaltorturesasIhavebeen。Itriedtobefaithfultoourarticlesofdepredation;buttherecamealimit。\"

  \"What\'sthetrouble,Bill?\"Iaskshim。

  \"Iwasrode,\"saysBill,\"theninetymilestothestockade,notbarringaninch。Then,whenthesettlerswasrescued,Iwasgivenoats。Sandain\'tapalatablesubstitute。

  Andthen,foranhourIhadtotrytoexplaintohimwhytherewasnothin\'inholes,howaroadcanrunbothwaysandwhatmakesthegrassgreen。Itellyou,Sam,ahumancanonlystandsomuch。Itakeshimbytheneckofhisclothesanddragshimdownthemountain。

  Onthewayhekicksmylegsblack-and-bluefromthekneesdown;andI\'vegottohavetwoorthreebitesonmythumbandhandcauterized。

  \"Buthe\'sgone\"——continuesBill——\"gonehome。

  IshowedhimtheroadtoSummitandkickedhimabouteightfeetnearerthereatonekick。I\'msorrywelosetheransom;butitwaseitherthatorBillDriscolltothemadhouse。\"

  Billispuffingandblowing,butthereisalookofineffablepeaceandgrowingcontentonhisrose-pinkfeatures。

  \"Bill,\"saysI,\"thereisn\'tanyheartdiseaseinyourfamily,isthere?

  \"No,\"saysBill,\"nothingchronicexceptmalariaandaccidents。Why?\"

  \"Thenyoumightturnaround,\"saysI,\"andhaveatookbehindyou。\"

  Billturnsandseestheboy,andloseshiscomplexionandsitsdownplumpontheroundandbeginstopluckaimlesslyatgrassandlittlesticks。ForanhourIwasafraidforhismind。AndthenItoldhimthatmyschemewastoputthewholejobthroughimmediatelyandthatwewouldgettheransomandbeoffwithitbymidnightifoldDorsetfellinwithourproposition。SoBillbracedupenoughtogivethekidaweaksortofasmileandapromisetoplaytheRussianinaJapanesewarwithhimissoonashefeltalittlebetter。

  Ihadaschemeforcollectingthatransomwithoutdangerofbeingcaughtbycounterplotsthatoughttocommenditselftoprofessionalkidnappers。Thetreeunderwhichtheanswerwastobeleft——andthemoneylateron——wasclosetotheroadfencewithbig,barefieldsonallsides。Ifagangofconstablesshouldbewatchingforanyonetocomeforthenotetheycouldseehimalongwayoffcrossingthefieldsorintheroad。Butno,sirree!Athalf-pasteightIwasupinthattreeaswellhiddenasatreetoad,waitingforthemessengertoarrive。

  Exactlyontime,ahalf-grownboyridesuptheroadonabicycle,locatesthepasteboardboxatthefootofthefence-post,slipsafoldedpieceofpaperintoitandpedalsawayagainbacktowardSummit。

  Iwaitedanhourandthenconcludedthethingwassquare。Isliddownthetree,gotthenote,slippedalongthefencetillIstruckthewoods,andwasbackatthecaveinanotherhalfanhour。Iopenedthenote,gotnearthelanternandreadittoBill。Itwaswrittenwithapeninacrabbedhand,andthesumandsubstanceofitwasthis:

  TwoDesperateMen。

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