CHAPTERV
SHOWINGHOWNEARTHETARPEIANROCKISTOTHECAPITOL
OnleavingMadamedeGodollo，laPeyradefeltthenecessityofgatheringhimselftogether。Beneaththeconversationhehadjustmaintainedwiththisstrangewoman，whatcouldhesee，——atrap，orarichanddistinguishedmarriageofferedtohim。Undersuchadoubtasthis，topressCelesteforanimmediateanswerwasneitherclevernorprudent；itwassimplytobindhimself，andclosethedoortothechanges，stillveryill—defined，whichseemedofferedtohim。TheresultoftheconsultationwhichTheodoseheldwithhimselfashewalkedalongtheboulevardwasthatheought，forthemoment，tothinkonlyofgainingtime。Consequently，insteadofgoingtotheThuilliers’tolearnCeleste’sdecision，hewenthome，andwrotethefollowinglittlenotetoThuillier：——
MydearThuillier，——YouwillcertainlynotthinkitextraordinarythatIshouldnotpresentmyselfatyourhouseto—day，——partlybecauseIfearthesentencewhichwillbepronounceduponme，andpartlybecauseIdonotwishtoseemanimpatientandunmannerlycreditor。Afewdays，moreorless，willmatterlittleundersuchcircumstances，andyetMademoiselleCollevillemayfindthemdesirablefortheabsolutefreedomofherchoice。Ishall，therefore，notgotoseeyouuntilyouwriteforme。
Iamnowmorecalm，andIhaveaddedafewmorepagestoourmanuscript；itwilltakebutlittletimetohandinthewholetotheprinter。
Everyours，TheodosedelaPeyrade。
Twohourslateraservant，dressedinwhatwasevidentlythefirststeptowardsalivery，whichtheThuilliersdidnotasyetventuretorisk，the\"maledomestic，\"whomMinardhadmentionedtothePhellions，arrivedatlaPeyrade’slodgingswiththefollowingnote：——
Cometo—night，withoutfail。WewilltalkoverthewholeaffairwithBrigitte。
YourmostaffectionatelydevotedJeromeThuillier。
\"Good！\"saidlaPeyrade；\"evidentlythereissomehindranceontheotherside；Ishallhavetimetoturnmyselfround。\"
Thatevening，whentheservantannouncedhimintheThuilliersalon，theComtessedeGodollo，whowassittingwithBrigitte，hastenedtoriseandleavetheroom。AsshepassedlaPeyradeshemadehimaveryceremoniousbow。Therewasnothingconclusivetobededucedfromthisabruptdeparture，whichmightsignifyanything，eithermuchornothing。
Aftertalkingoftheweatherandsoforthforatime，aspersonsdowhohavemettodiscussadelicatesubjectaboutwhichtheyarenotsureofcomingtoanunderstanding，thematterwasopenedbyBrigitte，whohadsentherbrothertotakeawalkontheboulevard，tellinghimtoleavehertomanagetheaffair。
\"Mydearboy，\"shesaidtoTheodose，\"itwasveryniceofyounottocomehereto—daylikeaGRASP—ALL，toputyourpistolatourthroats，forwewerenot，asithappened，quitereadytoansweryou。Ithink，\"
sheadded，\"thatourlittleCelesteneedsatriflemoretime。\"
\"Then，\"saidlaPeyrade，quickly，\"shehasnotdecidedinfavorofMonsieurFelixPhellion？\"
\"Joker！\"repliedtheoldmaid，\"youknowverywellyousettledthatbusinesslastnight；butyoualsoknow，ofcourse，thatherowninclinationsinclineherthatway。\"
\"Shortofbeingblind，Imusthaveseenthat，\"repliedlaPeyrade。
\"Itisnotanobstacletomyprojects，\"continuedMademoiselleThuillier；\"butitservestoexplainwhyIaskforCelestealittlemoretime；andalsowhyIhavewishedallalongtopostponethemarriagetoalaterdate。Iwantedtogiveyoutimetoinsinuateyourselfintotheheartofmydearlittlegirl——butyouandThuillierupsetmyplans。\"
\"Nothing，Ithink，hasbeendonewithoutyoursanction，\"saidlaPeyrade，\"andif，duringthesefifteendays，Ihavenottalkedwithyouonthesubject，itwasoutofpuredelicacy。Thuilliertoldmethateverythingwasagreeduponwithyou。\"
\"Onthecontrary，ThuillierknowsverywellthatIrefusedtomixmyselfuponyournewarrangements。Ifyouhadnotmadeyourselfsoscarcelately，ImighthavebeenthefirsttotellyouthatIdidnotapproveofthem。However，IcantrulysayIdidnothingtohindertheirsuccess。\"
\"Butthatwastoolittle，\"saidlaPeyrade；\"youractivehelpwasabsolutelynecessary。\"
\"Possibly；butI，whoknowwomenbetterthanyou，beingoneofthem，——
IfeltverysurethatifCelestewastoldtochoosebetweentwosuitorsshewouldconsiderthatapermissiontothinkathereaseoftheoneshelikedbest。ImyselfhadalwaysleftherinthevagueastoFelix，knowingasIdidthepropermomenttosettlehermindabouthim。\"
\"So，\"saidlaPeyrade，\"youmeanthatsherefusesme。\"
\"Itismuchworsethanthat，\"returnedBrigitte；\"sheacceptsyou，andiswillingtopledgeherword；butitissoeasytoseesheregardsherselfasavictim，thatifIwereinyourplaceIshouldfeelneitherflatterednorsecureinsuchaposition。\"
InanyotherconditionofmindlaPeyradewouldprobablyhaveansweredthatheacceptedthesacrifice，andwouldmakeithisbusinesstowintheheartwhichatfirstwasreluctantlygiven；butdelaynowsuitedhim，andherepliedtoBrigittewithaquestion：——
\"Thenwhatdoyouadvise？WhatcoursehadIbettertake？\"
\"FinishThuillier’spamphlet，inthefirstplace，orhe’llgocrazy；
andleavemetoworktheotheraffairinyourinterests，\"repliedBrigitte。
\"ButamIinfriendlyhands？For，totellyouthetruth，littleaunt，Ihavenotbeenabletoconcealfrommyselfthatyouhave，forsometimepast，changedverymuchtome。\"
\"Changedtoyou！Whatchangedoyouseeinme，addled—patethatyouare？\"
\"Oh！nothingverytangible，\"saidlaPeyrade；\"buteversincethatCountessTornahashadafootinginyourhouse——\"
\"Mypoorboy，thecountesshasdonememanyservices，andIamverygratefultoher；butisthatanyreasonwhyIshouldbefalsetoyou，whohavedoneusstillgreaterservices？\"
\"Butyoumustadmit，\"saidlaPeyrade，craftily，\"thatshehastoldyouagreatdealofharmofme。\"
\"Naturallyshehas；thesefineladiesareallthatway；theyexpectthewholeworldtoadorethem，andsheseesthatyouarethinkingonlyofCeleste；butallshehassaidtomeagainstyourunsoffmymindlikewaterfromvarnishedcloth。\"
\"So，then，littleaunt，Imaycontinuetocountonyou？\"persistedlaPeyrade。
\"Yes；providedyouarenottormenting，andwillletmemanagethisaffair。\"
\"Tellmehowyouaregoingtodoit？\"askedlaPeyrade，withanairofgreatgood—humor。
\"Inthefirstplace，IshallsignifytoFelixthatheisnottosetfootinthishouseagain。\"
\"Isthatpossible？\"saidthebarrister；\"Imeancanitbedonecivilly？\"
\"Verypossible；IshallmakePhellionhimselftellhim。He’samanwhoisalwaysastrideofprinciples，andhe’llbethefirsttoseethatifhissonwillnotdowhatisnecessarytoobtainCeleste’shandheoughttodepriveusofhispresence。\"
\"Whatnext？\"askedlaPeyrade。
\"Next，IshallsignifytoCelestethatshewasleftatlibertytochooseonehusbandortheother，andasshedidnotchooseFelixshemustmakeuphermindtotakeyou，apiousfellow，suchasshewants。
Youneedn’tbeuneasy；I’llsingyourpraises，especiallyyourgenerosityinnotprofitingbythearrangementsheagreedtomaketo—day。Butallthatwilltakeaweekatleast，andifThuillier’spamphletisn’toutbeforethen，Idon’tknowbutwhatweshallhavetoputhiminalunaticasylum。\"
\"Thepamphletcanbeoutintwodays。Butisitverycertain，littleaunt，thatweareplayingabove—board？Mountains，astheysay，nevermeet，butmendo；andcertainly，whenthetimecomestopromotetheelection，IcandoThuilliereithergoodorbadservice。Doyouknow，theotherdayIwasterriblyfrightened。Ihadaletterfromhiminmypocket，inwhichhespokeofthepamphletasbeingwrittenbyme。I
fanciedforamomentthatIhaddroppeditintheLuxembourg。IfI
had，whatascandalitwouldhavecausedinthequarter。\"
\"Whowoulddaretoplaytrickswithsuchawilyoneasyou？\"saidBrigitte，fullycomprehendingthecomminatorynatureoflaPeyrade’slastwords，interpolatedintotheconversationwithoutrhymeorreason。\"Butreally，\"sheadded，\"whyshouldyoucomplainofus？Itisyouwhoarebehindhandinyourpromises。Thatcrosswhichwastohavebeengrantedwithinaweek，andthatpamphlet，whichoughttohaveappearedalongtimeago——\"
\"Thepamphletandthecrosswillbothappearingoodtime；theonewillbringtheother，\"saidlaPeyrade，rising。\"TellThuilliertocomeandseemeto—morrowevening，andIthinkwecanthencorrectthelastsheet。But，aboveall，don’tlistentothespitefulnessofMadamedeGodollo；Ihaveanideathatinordertomakeherselfcompletelymistressofthishouseshewantstoalienateallyouroldfriends，andalsothatsheiscastinghernetforThuillier。\"
\"Well，inpointoffact，\"saidtheoldmaid，whomthepartingshotoftheinfernalbarristerhadtouchedontheever—sensitivepointofherauthority，\"Imustlookintothatmatteryouspeakofthere；sheisrathercoquettish，thatlittlewoman。\"
LaPeyradegainedasecondbenefitoutofthatspeechsoadroitlyflungout；hesawbyBrigitte’sanswertoitthatthecountesshadnotmentionedtoherthevisithehadpaidherduringtheday。Thisreticencemighthaveaseriousmeaning。
Fourdayslater，theprinter，thestitcher，thepaperglazierhavingfulfilledtheiroffices，Thuillierhadtheinexpressiblehappinessofbeginningontheboulevardsapromenade，whichhecontinuedthroughthePassages，andeventothePalais—Royal，pausingbeforeallthebook—shopswherehesaw，shininginblacklettersonayellowposter，thefamoustitle：——
TAXATIONANDTHESLIDING—SCALE
byJ。Thuillier，MemberoftheCouncil—GeneraloftheSeine。
Havingreachedthepointofpersuadinghimselfthatthecarehehadbestoweduponthecorrectionofproofsmadethemeritoftheworkhisown，hispaternalheart，likethatofMaitreCorbeau，couldnotcontainitselfforjoy。Weoughttoaddthatheheldinverylowesteemthosebooksellerswhodidnotannouncethesaleofthenewwork，destinedtobecome，ashebelieved，aEuropeanevent。Withoutactuallydecidingthemannerinwhichhewouldpunishtheirindifference，heneverthelessmadealistoftheserebelliouspersons，andwishedthemasmuchevilasiftheyhadofferedhimapersonalaffront。
Thenextdayhespentadelightfulmorninginwritingacertainnumberofletters，sendingthepublicationtofriends，andputtingintopapercoverssomefiftycopies，towhichthesacramentalphrase，\"Fromtheauthor，\"impartedtohiseyesaninestimablevalue。
Butthethirddayofthesalebroughtaslightdiminutionofhishappiness。Hehadchosenforhiseditorayoungman，doingbusinessatabreakneckpace，whohadlatelyestablishedhimselfinthePassagedesPanoramas，wherehewaspayingaruinousrent。HewasthenephewofBarbetthepublisher，whomBrigittehadhadasatenantintherueSaint—Dominiqued’Enfer。ThisBarbetjuniorwasayouthwhoflinchedatnothing；andwhenhewaspresentedtoThuillierbyhisuncle，hepledgedhimself，providedhewasnotshackledinhisadvertising，toselloffthefirsteditionandprintasecondwithinaweek。
Now，Thuillierhadspentaboutfifteenhundredfrancshimselfoncostsofpublication，such，forinstance，ascopiessentingreatprofusiontothenewspapers；butatthecloseofthethirddaySEVENcopiesonlyhadbeensold，andthreeofthoseoncredit。Itmightbebelievedthatinrevealingtothehorror—strickenThuillierthispaltryresulttheyoungpublisherwouldhavelostatleastsomethingofhisassurance。
Onthecontrary，thisGuzmanofthebook—tradehastenedtosay：——
\"Iamdelightedatwhathashappened。Ifwehadsoldahundredcopiesitwouldtroublemefarmorethanthefifteenhundrednowonourhands；that’swhatIcallhangingfire；whereasthisinsignificantsaleonlyprovesthattheeditionwillgoofflikearocket。\"
\"Butwhen？\"askedThuillier，whothoughtthisviewparadoxical。
\"Parbleu！\"saidBarbet，\"whenwegetnoticesinthenewspapers。
Newspapernoticesareonlyusefultoarouseattention。’Dearme！’saysthepublic，’there’sapublicationthatmustbeinteresting。’Thetitleisgood，——’TaxationandtheSliding—Scale，’——butIfindthatthemorepiquantatitleis，themorebuyersdistrustit，theyhavebeentakeninsooften；theywaitforthenotices。Ontheotherhand，forbooksthataredestinedtohaveonlyalimitedsale，ahundredready—
madepurchaserswillcomeinatonce，butafterthat，good—byetothem；wedon’tplaceanothercopy。\"
\"Thenyoudon’tthink，\"saidThuillier，\"thatthesaleishopeless？\"
\"Onthecontrary，Ithinkitisonthebesttrack。Whenthe’Debats，’
the’Constitutionnel，’the’Siecle，’andthe’Presse’havereviewedit，especiallyifthe’Debats’maulsit（theyareministerial，youknow），itwon’tbeaweekbeforethewholeeditionissnappedup。\"
\"Yousaythateasilyenough，\"repliedThuillier；\"buthowarewetogetholdofthosegentlemenofthepress？\"
\"Ah！I’lltakecareofthat，\"saidBarbet。\"Iamonthebestoftermswiththemanagingeditors；theysaythedevilisinme，andthatI
remindthemofLadvocatinhisbestdays。\"
\"Butthen，mydearfellow，yououghttohaveseentothisearlier。\"
\"Ah！excuseme，papaThuillier；there’sonlyonewayofseeingtothejournalists；butasyougrumbledaboutthefifteenhundredfrancsfortheadvertisements，Ididnotventuretoproposetoyouanotherextraexpense。\"
\"Whatexpense？\"askedThuillier，anxiously。
\"Whenyouwerenominatedtothemunicipalcouncil，wherewastheplanmooted？\"askedthepublisher。
\"Parbleu！inmyownhouse，\"repliedThuillier。
\"Yes，ofcourse，inyourownhouse，butatadinner，followedbyaball，andtheballitselfcrownedbyasupper。Well，mydearmaster，therearenotwowaystodothisbusiness；Boileausays：——
\"’Allisdonethroughthepalate，andnotthroughthemind；
Anditisbyourdinnerswegovernmankind。’\"
\"ThenyouthinkIoughttogiveadinnertothosejournalists？\"
\"Yes；butnotatyourownhouse；forthesejournalists，yousee，ifwomenarepresent，getstupid；theyhavetobehavethemselves。And，besides，itisn’tdinnertheywant，butabreakfast——thatsuitsthembest。Intheeveningthesegentlemenhavetogotofirstrepresentations，andmakeuptheirpapers，nottospeakoftheirownlittleprivatedoings；whereasinthemorningstheyhavenothingtothinkabout。Asforme，itisalwaysbreakfaststhatIgive。\"
\"Butthatcostsmoney，breakfastslikethat，\"saidThuillier；
\"journalistsaregourmands。\"
\"Bah！twentyfrancsahead，withoutwine。Sayyouhavetenofthem；
threehundredfrancswillseeyouhandsomelythroughthewholething。
Infact，asamatterofeconomy，breakfastsarepreferable；foradinneryouwouldn’tgetoffunderfivehundredfrancs。\"
\"Howyoutalk，youngman！\"saidThuillier。
\"Oh，hangit！everybodyknowsitcostsdeartogetelectedtotheChamber；andallthisfavorsyournomination。\"
\"ButhowcanIinvitethosegentlemen？MustIgoandseethemmyself？\"
\"Certainlynot；sendthemyourpamphletandappointthemtomeetyouatPhilippe’sorVefour’s——they’llunderstandperfectly。\"
\"Tenguests，\"saidThuillier，beginningtoenterintotheidea。\"Ididnotknowthereweresomanyleadingjournals。\"
\"Therearenot，\"saidthepublisher；\"butwemusthavethelittledogsaswell，fortheybarkloudest。Thisbreakfastiscertaintomakeanoise，andifyoudon’taskthemthey’llthinkyoupickandchoose，andeveryoneexcludedwillbeyourenemy。\"
\"Thenyouthinkitisenoughmerelytosendtheinvitations？\"
\"Yes；I’llmakethelist，andyoucanwritethenotesandsendthemtome。I’llseethattheyaredelivered；someofthemIshalltakeinperson。\"
\"IfIweresure，\"saidThuillier，undecidedly，\"thatthisexpensewouldhavethedesiredeffect——\"
\"IFIWERESURE，——that’saqueerthingtosay，\"saidBarbet。\"Mydearmaster，thisismoneyplacedonmortgage；forit，Iwillguaranteethesaleoffifteenhundredcopies，——sayatfortysousapiece；allowingthediscounts，thatmakesthreethousandfrancs。Youseethatyourcostsandextracostsarecovered，andmorethancovered。\"
\"Well，\"saidThuillier，turningtogo，\"I’lltalktolaPeyradeaboutit。\"
\"Asyouplease，mydearmaster；butdecidesoon，fornothinggetsmouldysofastasabook；writehot，servehot，andbuyhot，——that’stheruleforauthors，publishers，andpublic；allisboshoutsideofit，andnogoodtotouch。\"
WhenlaPeyradewasconsulted，hedidnotthinkinhisheartthattheremedywasheroic，buthehadnowcometofeelthebitterestanimosityagainstThuillier，sothathewaswellpleasedtoseethisnewtaxleviedonhisself—importantinexperienceandpompoussilliness。
AsforThuillier，themaniaforposingasapublicistandgettinghimselftalkedaboutsopossessedhimthatalthoughhemoanedoverthisfreshbleedingofhispurse，hehaddecidedonthesacrificebeforeheevenspoketolaPeyrade。Thereservedandconditionalapprovalofthelatterwas，therefore，morethanenoughtosettlehisdetermination，andthesameeveninghereturnedtoBarbetjuniorandaskedforthelistofguestswhomheoughttoinvite。
Barbetgailyproducedhislittlecatalogue。Insteadofthetenguestsoriginallymentioned，thereprovedtobefifteen，notcountinghimselforlaPeyrade，whomThuillierwantedtosecondhiminthisencounterwithasetofmenamongwhomhehimselffeltheshouldbealittleoutofplace。Castinghiseyesoverthelist，heexclaimed，vehemently：——
\"Heavens！mydearfellow，herearenamesofpapersnobodyeverheardof。Where’sthe’Moralisateur，’the’LanternedeDiogene，’the’Pelican，’the’EchodelaBievre’？\"
\"You’dbetterbecarefulhowyouscornthe’EchodelaBievre，’\"saidBarbet；\"why，that’sthepaperofthe12tharrondissement，fromwhichyouexpecttobeelected；itspatronsarethosebigtannersoftheMouffetardquarter！\"
\"Well，letthatgo——butthe’Pelican’？\"
\"The’Pelican’？that’sapaperyou’llfindineverydentist’swaiting—
room；dentistsarethefirstPUFFISTSintheworld！HowmanyteethdoyousupposearedailypulledinParis？\"
\"Come，come，nonsense，\"saidThuillier，whoproceededtomarkoutcertainnames，reducingthewholenumberpresenttofourteen。
\"Ifonefallsoffweshallbethirteen，\"remarkedBarbet。
\"Pooh！\"saidThuillier，thefree—thinker，\"doyousupposeIgiveintothatsuperstition？\"
Thelistbeingfinallyclosedandsettledatfourteen，Thuillierseatedhimselfatthepublisher’sdeskandwrotetheinvitations，naming，inviewoftheurgencyofthepurpose，thenextdaybutoneforthemeeting，Barbethavingassuredhimthatnojournalistwouldobjecttotheshortnessoftheinvitation。ThemeetingwasappointedatVefour’s，therestaurantparexcellenceofthebourgeoisieandallprovincials。
BarbetarrivedonthedaynamedbeforeThuillier，whoappearedinacravatwhichalonewasenoughtocreateastirinthesatiricalcircleinwhichhewasabouttoproducehimself。Thepublisher，onhisownauthority，hadchangedvariousarticlesonthebilloffareasselectedbyhispatron，moreespeciallydirectingthatthechampagne，orderedintruebourgeoisfashiontobeservedwiththedessert，shouldbeplacedonthetableatthebeginningofbreakfast，withseveraldishesofshrimps，anecessitywhichhadnotoccurredtotheamphitryon。
Thuillier，whogavealip—approvaltotheseamendments，wasfollowedbylaPeyrade；andthencamealongdelayinthearrivaloftheguests。Breakfastwasorderedateleveno’clock；ataquartertotwelvenotajournalisthadappeared。Barbet，whowasneverataloss，madetheconsolingremarkthatbreakfastsatrestaurantswerelikefunerals，where，aseveryoneknew，eleveno’clockmeantmid—day。
Sureenough，shortlybeforethathour，twogentlemen，withpointedbeards，exhalingastrongodoroftobacco，madetheirappearance。
Thuillierthankedthemeffusivelyforthe\"honor\"theyhaddonehim；
afterwhichcameanotherlongperiodofwaiting，ofwhichweshallnotrelatethetortures。Atoneo’clocktheassembledcontingentcomprisedfiveoftheinvitedguests，BarbetandlaPeyradenotincluded。Itisscarcelynecessarytosaythatnoneoftheself—respectingjournalistsofthebetterpapershadtakenanynoticeoftheabsurdinvitation。
Breakfastnowhadtobeservedtothisreducednumber。AfewpolitephrasesthatreachedThuillier’searsaboutthe\"immense\"interestofhispublication，failedtoblindhimtothebitternessofhisdiscomfiture；andwithoutthegaietyofthepublisher，whohadtakeninhandthereinshispatron，gloomyasHippolytusontheroadtoMycenae，letfall，nothingcouldhavesurpassedtheglumandglacialcoldnessofthemeeting。
Aftertheoysterswereremoved，thechampagneandchabliswhichhadwashedthemdownhadbegun，nevertheless，toraisethethermometer，when，rushingintotheroomwherethebanquetwastakingplace，ayoungmaninacapconveyedtoThuillieramostunexpectedandcrushingblow。
\"Master，\"saidthenew—comertoBarbet（hewasaclerkinthebookseller’sshop），\"wearedonefor！Thepolicehavemadearaiduponus；acommissaryandtwomenhavecometoseizemonsieur’spamphlet。
Here’sapapertheyhavegivenmeforyou。\"
\"Lookatthat，\"saidBarbet，handingthedocumenttolaPeyrade，hiscustomaryassurancebeginningtoforsakehim。
\"Asummonstoappearatoncebeforethecourtofassizes，\"saidlaPeyrade，afterreadingafewlinesofthesheriff’sscrawl。
Thuillierhadturnedaspaleasdeath。
\"Didn’tyoufulfilallthenecessaryformalities？\"hesaidtoBarbet，inachokingvoice。
\"Thisisnotamatterofformalities，\"saidlaPeyrade，\"itisaseizureforwhatiscalledpressmisdemeanor，excitingcontemptandhatredofthegovernment；youprobablyhavethesamesortofcomplimentawaitingyouathome，mypoorThuillier。\"
\"Thenitistreachery！\"criedThuillier，losinghisheadcompletely。
\"Hangit，mydearfellow！youknowverywellwhatyouputinyourpamphlet；formypart，Idon’tseeanythingworthwhippingacatfor。\"
\"There’ssomemisunderstanding，\"saidBarbet，recoveringcourage；\"itwillallbeexplained，andtheresultwillbeafinecauseofcomplaint——won’tit，messieurs？\"
\"Waiter，pensandink！\"criedoneofthejournaliststhusappealedto。
\"Nonsense！you’llhavetimetowriteyourarticlelater，\"saidanotherofthebrotherhood；\"whathasabombshelltodowiththis’filetsaute’？\"
That，ofcourse，wasaparodyonthefamousspeechofCharlesXII。，KingofSweden，whenashotinterruptedhimwhiledictatingtoasecretary。
\"Messieurs，\"saidThuillier，rising，\"Iamsureyouwillexcusemeforleavingyou。If，asMonsieurBarbetthinks，thereissomemisunderstanding，itoughttobeexplainedatonce；Imusttherefore，withyourpermission，gotothepolicecourt。LaPeyrade，\"headdedinasignificanttone，\"youwillnotrefuse，Ipresume，toaccompanyme。
Andyou，mydearpublisher，youwoulddowelltocometoo。\"
\"No，faith！\"saidBarbet，\"whenIbreakfast，Ibreakfast；ifthepolicehavecommittedablunder，somuchtheworseforthem。\"
\"Butsupposethematterisserious？\"criedThuillier，ingreatagitation。
\"Well，Ishouldsay，whatisperfectlytrue，thatIhadneverreadalineofyourpamphlet。Onethingisveryannoying；thosedamnedjurieshatebeards，andImustcutoffmineifI’mcompelledtoappearincourt。\"
\"Come，mydearamphitryon，sitdownagain，\"saidtheeditorofthe\"EchodelaBievre，\"\"we’llstandbyyou；I’vealreadywrittenanarticleinmyheadwhichwillstirupallthetannersinParis；and，letmetellyou，thathonorablecorporationisapower。\"
\"No，monsieur，\"repliedThuillier，\"no；amanlikemecannotrestanhourundersuchanaccusationasthis。Continueyourbreakfastwithoutus；Ihopesoontoseeyouagain。LaPeyrade，areyoucoming？\"
\"He’scharming，isn’the？\"saidBarbet，whenThuillierandhiscounselhadlefttheroom。\"Toaskmetoleaveabreakfastaftertheoysters，andgoandtalkwiththepolice！Come，messieurs，closeuptheranks，\"
headded，gaily。
\"Tiens！\"saidoneofthehungryjournalists，whohadcasthiseyesintothegardenofthePalais—Royal，onwhichthedining—roomoftherestaurantopened，\"there’sBarbanchugoingby；supposeIcallhimin？\"
\"Yes，certainly，\"saidBarbetjunior，\"havehimup。\"
\"Barbanchu！Barbanchu！\"calledoutthejournalist。
Barbanchu，hishatbeingoverhiseyes，wassometimeindiscoveringthecloudabovehimwhencethevoiceproceeded。
\"Here，uphere！\"calledthevoice，whichseemedtoBarbanchucelestialwhenhesawhimselfhailedbyamanwithaglassofchampagneinhishand。Then，asheseemedtohesitate，thepartyabovecalledoutinchorus：——
\"Comeup！comeup！THERE’SFATTOBEHAD！\"
WhenThuillierlefttheofficeofthepublicprosecutorhecouldnolongerhaveanyillusions。Thecaseagainsthimwasserious，andthesternmannerinwhichhehadbeenreceivedmadehimseethatwhenthetrialcameuphewouldbetreatedwithoutmercy。Then，asalwayshappensamongaccomplicesafterthenon—successofanaffairtheyhavedoneincommon，heturneduponlaPeyradeinthesharpestmanner：LaPeyradehadpaidnoattentiontowhathewrote；hehadgivenfullswingtohisstupidSaint—Simonianideas；HEdidn’tcarefortheconsequences；itwasnotHEwhowouldhavetopaythefineandgotoprison！Then，whenlaPeyradeansweredthatthematterdidnotlooktohimserious，andheexpectedtogetaverdictofacquittalwithoutdifficulty，Thuillierburstforthuponhim，vehemently：——