第9章
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  NowshefoundinWilliam’sface,notpity,butacalm,evenjovial,acceptanceofthesituationasamatterofcourse。Shehadknownshewasgoingtohatethatpity;butnow,curiouslyenough,shewasconsciousonlyofangerthatthepitywasnotthere——thatshemighthateit。

  Shetossedherheadalittle。SoevenWilliam——UncleWilliam——regardedthismonstrousthingasaninsignificantmatterofeverydayexperience。

  Maybeheexpectedittooccurfrequently——everynight,orso。Doubtlesshedidexpectittooccureverynight,orso。Indeed!Verywell。Asifsheweregoingtoshow_now_thatshecaredwhetherBertramwerethereornot!Theyshouldsee。

  Sowithheadheldhighandeyesasparkle,Billymarchedintothedining-roomandtookheraccustomedplace。

  CHAPTERVII

  THEBIGBADQUARREL

  Itwasabrilliantdinner——becauseBillymadeitso。AtfirstWilliammethersalliesofwitwithmildsurprise;butitwasnotlongbeforeherosegallantlytotheoccasion,andgavebackfullmeasureofretort。EvenPetetwicehadtoturnhisbacktohideasmile,andoncehishandshooksothattheteahewascarryingalmostspilled。

  Thisthreatenedcatastrophe,however,seemedtofrightenhimsomuchthathisfacewasverygravethroughouttherestofthedinner。

  Stilllaughingandtalkinggayly,BillyandUncleWilliam,afterthemealwasover,ascendedtothedrawing-room。There,however,theman,inspiteoftheyoungwoman’sgaybadinage,felltodozinginthebigchairbeforethefire,leavingBillywithonlySpunkieforcompany——Spunkie,who,disdainingeveryefforttoenticeherintoaromp,onlywinkedandblinkedstupideyes,andfinallycurledherselfontherugforanap。

  Billy,lefttoherowndevices,glancedatherwatch。

  Half-pastseven!Time,almost,forBertramtobecoming。Hehadsaiddinner’;and,ofcourse,afterdinnerwasoverhewouldbecominghome——toher。Verywell;shewouldshowhimthatshehadatleastgotalongwithouthimaswellashehadwithouther。Atalleventshewouldnotfindherforlornlysittingwithhernosepressedagainstthewindow-pane!AndforthwithBillyestablishedherselfinabigchairwithitsbackcarefullyturnedtowardthedoorbywhichBertramwouldenter,andopenedabook。

  Five,ten,fifteenminutespassed。Billyfidgetedinherchair,twistedhernecktolookoutintothehall——anddroppedherbookwithabang。

  UncleWilliamjerkedhimselfawake,andSpunkieopenedsleepyeyes。Thenbothsettledthemselvesforanothernap。Billysighed,pickedupherbook,andflouncedbackintoherchair。

  Butshedidnotread。Disconsolatelyshesatstaringstraightahead——untilaquicksteponthesidewalkoutsidestirredherintoinstantaction。

  Assumingalookofabsorbedinterestshetwitchedthebookopenandhelditbeforeherface……

  Butthesteppassedbythedoor:andBillysawthenthatherbookwasupsidedown。

  Five,ten,fifteenmoreminutespassed。Billystillsat,apparentlyreading,thoughshehadnotturnedapage。Thebooknow,however,wasrightsideup。Onebyoneotherminutespassedtillthegreatclockinthehallstruckninelongstrokes。

  Well,well,blessmysoul!’mumbledUncleWilliam,resolutelyforcinghimselftowakeup。

  Whattimewasthat?’

  Nineo’clock。’Billyspokewithtragicdistinctness,yetverycheerfully。

  Eh?Onlynine?’blinkedUncleWilliam。

  Ithoughtitmustbeten。Well,anyhow,I

  believeI’llgoup-stairs。Iseemtobeunusuallysleepy。’

  Billysaidnothing。`Onlynine,’indeed!’

  shewasthinkingwrathfully。

  AtthedoorUncleWilliamturned。

  You’renotgoingtositup,mydear,ofcourse,’heremarked。

  ForthesecondtimethateveningacoldhandseemedtoclutchBilly’sheart。

  _Situp!_Haditcomealreadytothat?Wassheevennowawifewhohadneedto_situp_forherhusband?

  Ireallywouldn’t,mydear,’advisedUncleWilliamagain。Goodnight。’

  Oh,butI’mnotsleepyatall,yet,’Billymanagedtodeclarebrightly。Goodnight。’

  ThenUncleWilliamwentup-stairs。

  Billyturnedtoherbook,whichhappenedtobeoneofWilliam’sonFakeAntiques。’

  `Tocollectanything,thesedays,requiresexpertknowledge,andtheutmostcareanddiscrimination,’’readBilly’seyes。SoUncleWilliam_expected_Bertramwasgoingtospendthewholeeveningaswellasstaytodinner!’ranBilly’sthoughts。`Theenormousquantityofbijouterie,DresdenandBatterseaenamelwarethatisnowfloodingthemarket,ismadeontheContinent——andmadechieflyfortheAmericantrade,’’continuedthebook。

  Well,whocaresifitis,’snappedBilly,springingtoherfeetandtossingthevolumeaside。

  Spunkie,comehere!You’vesimplygottoplaywithme。Doyouhear?Iwanttobegay——_gay_——GAY!He’sgay。He’sdowntherewiththosemen,wherehewantstobe。Wherehe’d_rather_bethanbewithme!DoyouthinkIwanthimtocomehomeandfindmemopingoverastupidoldbook?Notmuch!I’mgoingtohavehimfindmegay,too。Now,come,Spunkie;

  hurry——wakeup!He’llbehererightaway,I’msure。’AndBillyshookapairofworstedreins,hungwithlittlesoftballs,fullinSpunkie’sface。

  ButSpunkiewouldnotwakeup,andSpunkiewouldnotplay。Shepretendedto。Shebitatthereins,andsankhersharpclawsintothedanglingballs。Forafleetinginstant,even,somethinglikemischiefgleamedinherbigyelloweyes。

  Thenthejawsrelaxed,thepawsturnedtovelvet,andSpunkie’ssleekgrayheadsettledslowlybackintolazycomfort。Spunkiewasasleep。

  Billygazedatthecatwithreproachfuleyes。

  Andyou,too,Spunkie,’shemurmured。

  Thenshegottoherfeetandwentbacktoherchair。Thistimeshepickedupamagazineandbegantoturntheleavesveryfast,oneafteranother。

  Half-pastninecame,thenten。PeteappearedatthedoortogetSpunkie,andtoseethateverythingwasallrightforthenight。

  Mr。Bertramisnotinyet?’hebegandoubtfully。

  Billyshookherheadwithabrightsmile。

  No,Pete。Gotobed。Iexpecthimeveryminute。Goodnight。’

  Thankyou,ma’am。Goodnight。’

  Theoldmanpickedupthesleepycatandwentdown-stairs。AlittlelaterBillyheardhisquietstepscomingbackthroughthehallandascendingthestairs。Shelisteneduntilfromawayatthetopofthehousesheheardhisdoorclose。Thenshedrewalongbreath。

  Teno’clock——afterteno’clock,andBertramnotthereyet!Andwasthiswhathecalleddinner?

  Didoneeat,then,tillteno’clock,whenonedinedwithone’sfriends?

  Billywasangrynow——veryangry。Shewastooangrytobereasonable。Thisthingthatherhusbandhaddoneseemedmonstroustoher,smarting,asshewas,underthestingofhurtprideandgrievedloneliness——thestateofmindintowhichshehadworkedherself。Nolongernowdidshewishtobegaywhenherhusbandcame。Nolongerdidsheevenpretendtoassumeindifference。Bertramhaddonewrong。Hehadbeenunkind,cruel,thoughtless,inconsiderateofhercomfortandhappiness。Furthermorehe_didnot_loveheraswellasshedidhimorhenever,nevercouldhavedoneit!Shewouldlethimsee,whenhecame,justhowhurtandgrievedshewas——andhowdisappointed,too。

  Billywaswalkingthefloornow,backandforth,backandforth。

  Half-pasttencame,theneleven。AstheelevenlongstrokesreverberatedthroughthesilenthouseBillydrewinherbreathandhelditsuspended。

  Anewlookcametohereyes。Agrowingterrorcreptintothemandculminatedinafrightenedstareattheclock。

  Billyranthentothegreatouterdoorandpulleditopen。Acoldwindstungherface,andcausedhertoshutthedoorquickly。Backandforthshebegantopacetheflooragain;butinfiveminutesshehadruntothedooroncemore。ThistimesheworeaheavycoatofBertram’swhichshecaughtupasshepassedthehall-rack。

  OutontothebroadtopstepBillyhurried,andpeereddownthestreet。Asfarasshecouldseenotapersonwasinsight。AcrossthestreetinthePublicGardenthewindstirredthegraytree-branchesandsetthemtocastingweirdshadowsonthebare,frozenground。AwarningsomethingbehindhersentBillyscurryingintothehousejustintimetopreventtheheavydoor’sclosingandshuttingherout,keyless,inthecold。

  Half-pastelevencame,andagainBillyrantothedoor。Thistimesheputthefloor-matagainstthecasingsothatthedoorcouldnotclose。Oncemoreshepeeredwildlyupanddownthestreet,andacrossintothedeserted,wind-sweptGarden。

  TherewasonlyterrornowinBilly’sface。Theangerwasallgone。InBilly’smindtherewasnotashadowofdoubt——somethinghadhappenedtoBertram。

  Bertramwasill——hurt——dead!Andhewassogood,sokind,sonoble;suchadear,dearhusband!Ifonlyshecouldseehimonce。Ifonlyshecouldaskhisforgivenessforthosewicked,unkind,accusingthoughts。Ifonlyshecouldtellhimagainthatshedidlovehim。Ifonly——

  Fardownthestreetasteprangsharplyonthefrostyair。Amasculinefigurewashurryingtowardthehouse。Retreatingwellintotheshadowofthedoorway,Billywatchedit,herheartpoundingagainsthersideingreatsuffocatingthrobs。

  NearerandnearerstrodetheapproachingfigureuntilBillyhadalmostsprungtomeetitwithagladcry——almost,butnotquite;forthefigureneitherturnednorpaused,butmarchedstraighton——andBillysawthen,underthearclight,abrown-beardedmanwhowasnotBertramatall。

  Threetimesduringthenextfewminutesdidthewaitinglittlebrideonthedoorstepwatchwithpalpitatingyearningashadowyformappear,approach——andpassby。Atthethirdheart-breakingdisappointment,Billywrungherhandshelplessly。

  Idon’tseehowtherecanbe——somany——

  utterly_useless_peopleintheworld!’shechoked。

  Then,thoroughlychilledandsickatheart,shewentintothehouseandclosedthedoor。

  Onceagain,backandforth,backandforth,Billytookupherwearyvigil。Shestillworetheheavycoat。Shehadforgottentotakeitoff。

  Herfacewaspitifullywhiteanddrawn。Hereyeswerewild。Oneofherhandswasnervouslycaressingtheroughsleeveofthecoatasithungfromhershoulder。

  One——two——three——

  Billygaveasharpcryandranintothehall。

  Yes,itwastwelveo’clock。Andnow,always,alltherestofthedreary,uselesshoursthatthatclockwouldtickawaythroughanendlessexistence,shewouldhavetolive——withoutBertram。

  Ifonlyshecouldseehimoncemore!Butshecouldnot。Hewasdead。Hemustbedead,now。

  Hereitwastwelveo’clock,and——

  Therecameaquickstep,theclickofakeyinthelock,thenthedoorswungbackandBertram,big,strong,andmerry-eyed,stoodbeforeher。

  Well,well,hullo,’hecalledjovially。Why,Billy,what’sthematter?’hebrokeoff,inquiteadifferenttoneofvoice。

  Andthenacuriousthinghappened。Billy,who,aminutebefore,hadbeenseeingonlyadear,noble,adorable,_lost_Bertram,sawnowsuddenlyonlythemanthathadstayed_happily_tillmidnightwithtwofriends,whileshe——she——

  Matter!Matter!’exclaimedBillysharply,then。Isthiswhatyoucallstayingtodinner,BertramHenshaw?’

  Bertramstared。Aslowredstoletohisforehead。Itwashisfirstexperienceofcominghometomeetangryeyesthatquestionedhisbehavior——andhedidnotlikeit。Hehadbeen,perhaps,alittleconscience-smittenwhenhesawhowlatehehadstayed;andhehadintendedtosayhewassorry,ofcourse。Buttobethussharplycalledtoaccountforaperfectlyinnocentgoodtimewithacoupleoffriends——!TocomehomeandfindBillymakingaridiculousscenelikethis——!He——hewouldnotstandforit!He——

  Bertram’slipssnappedopen。Theangryretortwasalmostspokenwhensomethinginthepiteouslyquiveringchinandwhite,drawnfaceoppositestoppeditjustintime。

  Why,Billy——darling!’hemurmuredinstead。

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